Mirror Mirror: A Contemporary Christian Epic-Novel (The Grace Series Book 1)
Author: Stallings, Staci
Date: 2016-05-24

Mirror Mirror

The Grace Series

Book One

By:  Staci Stallings

KINDLE EDITION

~*~*~*~

Spirit Light Publishing

Mirror Mirror

Copyright © 2014 by Staci Stallings

Cover Art by Marion Ueckermann
www.marionueckermann.net

Author’s Website
http://www.stacistallings.net

Kindle Edition License Notes

This eBook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only.  This eBook may not be resold or given away to other people.  If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each person you share it with.  If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then you should return to eStore and purchase your own copy.  Thank you for respecting the author’s work.

Publisher’s Note:  This is a work of fiction. Names, places, characters, and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.

What Readers Are Saying About

“Mirror Mirror”

Coming Soon!

Table of Contents

What Readers Are Saying

Dedication

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Chapter 12

Chapter 13

Chapter 14

Chapter 15

Chapter 16

Chapter 17

Chapter 18

Chapter 19

Chapter 20

Chapter 21

Chapter 22

Chapter 23

Chapter 24

Chapter 25

Chapter 26

Chapter 27

Chapter 28

Chapter 29

Chapter 30

Chapter 31

Chapter 32

Chapter 33

Chapter 34

Chapter 35

Chapter 36

Chapter 37

Chapter 38

Chapter 39

Epilogue

Also Available from Staci Stallings

About the Author

*~*

To those who think they

“Got it all wrong,”

There’s still time to make

A new decision!

*~*

Mirror, Mirror

Chapter 1

“She’s coming. I cannot believe she is coming. Seriously.” Jaycee Lawrence plunked down next to Luke Baker for two seconds and then jumped back up and continued to pace in front of the back step of his parents’ home. He watched her—back and forth, back and forth—unsure of just what to say to defuse the time bomb in her voice and movements.

“Is it really so bad?” Luke finally asked, his longish, blondish hair threatening to slide down his forehead and into his eye as it always did. He scratch at the summer scruff on his jaw in concern and worry. He’d been trying for ten minutes to calm Jaycee down, but he of all people knew when she got riled, calm was a long shot on a short horse.

Just like that she spun on him, sending her high, light brown ponytail swinging behind her. She glared at him through the harsh black glasses she insisted on wearing so everyone knew she was not just a dumb girl. “You’re kidding me. Right?” She crossed her arms and the glare became a scowl. “Please tell me you’re kidding. How can you even sit there and ask that question? You know as well as I do that nothing good can come from her coming here. And for the whole summer too!” Jaycee’s hands went into the air simultaneously and then crashed down onto her hips. With a shake of her head, she pursed her lips and her eyes narrowed as if focusing their laser-heat onto a target. “I cannot believe they are doing this to me. This was supposed to be my summer. Mine. Not hers. Mine.”

“Well, how long is she staying?” Not that there was any way of talking Jaycee down at this point, but Luke was still searching for an angle just the same.

“Three months.” Storm waning, she sat down next to him in a huff and shook her head, the desolation trailing every movement. “I’m done. Seriously. I am so done. She is going to waltz in here like the Queen of Persia, and I’m going to totally be yesterday’s news.”

Luke’s smile only lifted half his lips, and he anchored his arm on the porch planks behind her. They weren’t together in a dating sense, but they had known each other since well before kindergarten, and with only one year separating them not to mention only a little more than half a mile between their houses, they had been fast friends for practically forever. Jaycee was more the tomboy, basketball-playing type where Luke much preferred more laid back pursuits that didn’t involve scoreboards or report cards. But somehow, their friendship fit them both.

Besides, Jaycee had her eye on Rory Harris, the top jock at Ridgemount High School, and that didn’t look to change any time soon. With no warning, she put her forehead over onto Luke’s shoulder and moaned. “Ugh. My life stinks on ice.”

Gamely, he put his hand on her opposite shoulder and patted it. “I think you’ll survive. I can almost guarantee it.”

But that only brought out another moan. It was going to be a long summer.

Sage Wentworth pulled out her compact to check her makeup once again. Yes, she was being banished to nowheresville North Carolina, but she didn’t have to show up looking like a doormat. Lips, perfectly perfect red; eyeliner remarkably holding up even after the second leg of the cross-country flight, and blush that had begun to fade just slightly. Ugh.

Taking out the applicator, she brushed a touch more on, checked her reflection in the tiny mirror and clicked it shut just as the stewardess came to offer ice water.

“Ma’am,” the stewardess said, handing her the water.

However, Sage expertly dogged the offer. “Do you not have some that’s room temp? I don’t do ice. And not this off-brand either.”

The stewardess swallowed whatever she was about to say and smiled. “Certainly.”

When she was gone, Sage wiggled herself straight up in the first class seat. At least not everything was completely, horrifically awful about her life at the moment. Okay, so her parents were starting their summer trip around the world—without her. And, true, she was being shipped off to live for three months with people she barely remembered. And, granted, she had wanted to stay in Beverly Hills for the summer, shopping with Mackenzie and Patelyn.

Sage sighed. Okay. Her life stunk, royally.

Why had they insisted on making her completely miserable? What had she done to deserve this exile to the netherworld? Carefully, she ticked through the options. Her grades were good. Not stellar maybe, but adequate. She didn’t overspend. Sure there was that binge two months ago, but no one could blame a girl for wanting to look good at the Prom. She wasn’t a druggie or an alkie. Though both were frequent options in the crowd she ran with.

No. There was no real rhyme or reason to this banishment.

They said it was because her dad wanted to see her before she headed into senior year and then off into her life, but the sad fact was, Sage wasn’t even really sure what that “life” might look like. College? Maybe. Okay. Probably. But where?

Berkley? UCLA? Or somewhere farther away?

Maybe she could study abroad for a semester. Sweden or France. Studying in Paris. How amazing would that be?

“Ma’am.” The stewardess was back with the requested water. So this brand wasn’t much better, Sage accepted it with the graciousness due her station in life.

“And may I have just a bit of lemon?” she asked in her sweetest, asking-for voice.

It was truly astonishing how quickly the stewardess could eat words that never came from her mouth but shot from her eyes. “Of course.”

It was to be expected. The help, helpful though they were, often seemed one request away from losing it completely. Her mother always said it was the plight they suffered under—trying to keep good help. Sadly, it was true. As she sipped on her water, Sage let her mind trace back through her childhood nannies. There were truly too many to count. Of course, most of them were less than adequate, but still…

There was Mika from Italy, and Olga from Germany, and Carmela from Spain or was it South America? Sage had never really been sure. But she had learned, her place was to tell the nannies what to do, and it was their place to do it. When they got that dynamic out-of-sync—and they always did, it was time for a new nanny.

Sage reached into the pocket with the reading material and thumbed through the fashion magazine that held little fascination for her. Those people didn’t know how to dress, and they wouldn’t know a tasteful accessory if it walked up and introduced itself.

Bawdy and classless. That’s what most of them were, and those were the ones who were trying. She flipped three more pages and gave up completely, pushing the magazine back into its holder. Putting her head back, she let her gaze go out to the soft, sunlit day beyond. They had told her that her father would be meeting her at the airport, and her mind traced back over the one photograph she had of him along with the dusky images she barely remembered.

In the picture he was young, mid-twenties, maybe, with dark curly hair. A nice nose. Nice eyes. Her mother had said once that she had her father’s eyes, which seemed a strange thing to say at the time. Then again, she was five and didn’t know you could have someone else’s eyes without actually having someone else’s eyes. She took another sip and let the sigh out in an inaudible breath.

Ladies of her station didn’t sigh, not for others to hear anyway. No. If nothing else in the whole world, she had learned how to carry herself in public, how to be graceful, charming, and cheerful—even if the whole world was falling apart around her. She wasn’t royal exactly, but her training had gone right up to that gate and knocked. Teas. Ballet. Violin in the orchestra.

Oh, yes. She had culture running out her ears, and she was proud of it.

So all she had to do was get through the next three months, and when she returned, her mother was planning the biggest coming out party for her 18th birthday that the Hills had ever seen. No one would ever, ever forget it, and to Sage, that was what life was all about—being completely unforgettable.

“I thought I told you to dust the living room,” Jaycee’s mom said in an all-out panic. The queen would arrive in less than two hours, and the place still did not resemble the palace her mother clearly wished it was.

“I did dust. Twice.” And with that Jaycee turned and stalked off. Halfway to her room, she stopped when her mother called something about the entertainment center.

Putting her head back, she fought the frustration clawing at her. “You have got to be kidding me. I don’t think a little dust is going to kill anyone.” But she knew her mother was frantic, and she knew why. Everyone was—her father, her mother, even her little brother, Ryder who had taken an outright shower that morning without being asked, something he never did. In fact, most of the time they were lucky if he wasn’t covered in dust, dirt and grime when they went to church.

It was what normal 10-year-old boys did. So long as the queen wasn’t coming. But today, the queen was coming, and so nothing was normal.

“Jaycee!” her mother called again, and Jaycee had to say a quick prayer to get God to give her patience. The only question was, could she conceivably pray her way through an entire summer?

“Sage?” The man was older, much older, than the picture. However, he had those same grey-green eyes and the nice smile that was at once boyish and a question.

“Dad?” It was such a strange place to stand in life—with fellow travelers bumping this way and that around them, staring at her past as the present swirled around her.

His smile filled out with even more questions and words he never said.

What was the protocol in such a situation? Should she shake his hand or Heaven help her, hug him? A moment more and he put his hand out even as his gaze continued to drink her in. Thankful it was turned for a handshake and not a hug, she took it and let her gaze drop beneath his.

“I’m so glad you could come,” he said, sounding choked.

“Thanks for having me.”

His hand dropped from hers, and she lifted her gaze and fought to put it on his and keep it there. But it was just all so awkward.

“Did you have a good flight?”

She nodded. “It was fine.”

“I’m glad.” Standing there in jeans, a pressed shirt and a light grayish jacket, he looked like all the dads on television. Nothing at all like her dad. Okay, her stepdad. Jason Wentworth the Fourth. The man she had called dad practically her whole life if you didn’t count the short visits during the first five years of it, which she hadn’t until this very minute.

His eyebrows went up questioningly. “I’m sure you have luggage?”

“Some.”

“Great. Why don’t we go get it and get you home and settled?”

Home and settled. They were such strange words.

Luke wondered as the day wore on if Jaycee’s stepsister had made it yet. Truthfully, he couldn’t imagine the whole step situation. The youngest of five, he had never known a time until just this past year of not having siblings who were in the bathroom when you had to go or who could keep their hands off of your stuff even when it was clearly marked My Stuff!

Down the aisle of the grocery store he went, ticking off items for the church outreach day. It was a twice-a-month thing for their youth group. The other two weeks were taken by the women’s society, and sometimes the youth helped out for those as well.

As cultures went, their little town didn’t really have any homeless people, but they did have their share of disadvantaged ones. Luke pulled several large cans of tomato sauce from the shelves and put them in the cart. If he had learned no other words in the time Pastor Steve had been there, the words “help others” were seared into his brain and on his spirit. That was, according to Pastor Steve, the point of everything in life and especially Christianity—helping others, reaching out to them, making them feel welcome and loved. It truly didn’t matter if they ever showed up for church beyond those meals. That was what the church was about, and if they failed in that mission, nothing else really mattered.

He looked at the list Ms. Patty had given him. Ms. Patty, or Ms. P, as most of the youth referred to her was a large, African-American woman with a personality to match her girth. She had never met a stranger because according to her, once you hug a person, they are no longer a stranger, and Ms. P hugged everybody—whether they needed one or not.

In fact, Luke had had his fair share of hugs from Ms. P because next to introducing herself with a hug, she also paid with them as well. As president of the youth group, he was often tasked with… well, tasks. Cleaning the church center’s kitchen, getting the groceries, working out the schedules, covering when others couldn’t make it.

“He’s my Superman,” Ms. P often said of Luke, and though it embarrassed him, he’d learned not to try to get out of the compliment because Ms. P really came after you good then.

Pulling five large bags of spaghetti off the shelf, he added them to the growing mound in his cart. Only bread remained on the list, and he pushed his way around the aisle cap to get it. As soon as he finished here, he needed to get over to the church. They wouldn’t be cooking until in the morning, but the food needed to be put away, and he would probably have to do some cleaning on the kitchen as well. The last thing he wanted was for Ms. P to show up and have to do it. She did enough.

Grabbing loaves of bread, he thought again of Jaycee. Normally she would be here, meeting up with him with another cart about now. But not today. Today, she was re-meeting her sister, and Luke had to admit he was glad he was here rather than there. “God, help them… both,” he breathed as he headed for the checkout.

From her seat in the aging family minivan, Sage did her best to check her adverse reaction to practically everything as they rolled through the little town and out into the country. Somehow she hadn’t really remembered this part. Not that the town would have been any better. She was quite sure the newest home there was at least a decade old and had not weathered its age very well.

“Jaycee and Ryder are really excited you’re coming,” her dad said, glancing over at her. “It’s all they’ve been talking about.”

Sage smiled, but it was forced. Had it not been for his efforts, no one would have even spoken on the ride. She just didn’t know what to say to the man. It wouldn’t be, couldn’t be what she was really thinking, and the truth was, pretending her thoughts were something they were not was not working at all.

“So, do you remember any of this?” he asked as if hoping she might.

The smile got swallowed in her fight to cushion the truth. “Not much. I kind of remember going to the church. It’s the little one, right? With the wooden floors?”

His smile was the brightest one she had seen so far. “You remember that, huh?”

“Yes.” Clutching her white handbag, she willed the panic in her to settle down. Why had she agreed to this? The second she got the chance to text her mother, she was going to find another option and take it because this was a bad idea. A very, very bad idea.

“They’re here.” Jaycee’s mom veritably swooned as she checked both children before heading for the front door of their house which no one ever used. It took more than one wrench of the doorknob to get it open after she fluffed and fretted about her own appearance.

Jaycee knotted her arms and shook her head. “Mom, come on. This is ridiculous.”

When her mother turned and caught sight of her, she scowled. “Jaycee Marie, stand up straight. We want to make a good impression.”

With a deep sigh and a roll of her eyes, Jaycee straightened. This was going to be a long three months.

The house was small, tiny in fact, and as Sage exited the vehicle, she took it all in, wondering how many rooms it could even have. Five? Six? And that was being generous.

“I can come back and get your bags,” her dad said, coming around the front of the van to walk with her. Wow. That felt so off-kilter, him standing there waiting for her, looking at her like she was an angel fallen from Heaven.

Fighting every horrible thought in her, Sage squared her shoulders, lifted her chin and put her head back. Somehow she managed to smile at him brightly.

“Ready?” he asked, and he offered her his arm.

The nod was kind of sideways, but she did get her head to go down. Her heels clicked on the concrete sidewalk as they passed the modest flowerbed that was filled with growing things and a few flowers all the way to the front door. There, he opened it for her, and called, “We’re home!”

He took a step back to let her enter first. Stepping up and into the home was a challenge mostly because it seemed so very dark and dim inside. The last thing she wanted to do was trip.

“Oh!” The woman with the long, dark wavy hair on the other side of the threshold clapped her hands and put them to her mouth. “Sage. Oh! You’ve grown so much. We’re so glad you could come.”

Without warning, she was pulled into a hug that lasted mere seconds but felt much longer than that.

“Oh. Yes. Thank you.” Exiting the hug, Sage tugged on her short white skirt and had to square her shoulders again to get her composure back in hand. “Hm.” Smiling was beginning to hurt.

“Oh, I’m sorry. I’m Mrs. Lawrence, Gregory’s wife.” The woman was going in five directions at once, and Sage did her best to keep her own nerves in check as the woman shook her hand. “You can call me Mrs. Lawrence or Emily or… Stepmom if you would like.” She laughed a hollow, nervous kind of laugh.

“It’s nice to see you again, Mrs. Lawrence.” Okay, the truth was, she didn’t really remember seeing her the last time, but it was something to say that didn’t sound totally ridiculous.

“Oh good. Okay. And these are our children.” Mrs. Lawrence went over to the two figures on the other side of the room. “This is Jaycee. You probably remember her from last time, and this is Ryder.”

Nodding and trying to smile at both of them, Sage willed her polite training to overtake her judgment of everyone and everything. “It’s nice to meet you both.”

“Nice to meet you,” Ryder said, staring at her as if he had been star struck.

“Yeah,” Jaycee said, and Sage noted without any trouble the dismissive nature of the syllable from the young woman in jeans with the hard, black framed glasses. Then Jaycee looked over at her mom. “Can I go now? I’m supposed to meet Luke at church to do the groceries.”

Mrs. Lawrence glanced over at Sage with an apology in her eyes and then leveled her gaze at her daughter. “Don’t you think it would be better to stay and help Sage get settled? Maybe she could go with you afterward.”

The tilt of Jaycee’s head and eyebrows told Sage loud and clear that if that happened, it would not be a welcome change of plans.

“Oh, that’s fine, Mrs. Lawrence,” Sage said quickly, wanting to rescue the situation if that was even possible. “I’m sure Jaycee has better things to do than to wait on me. I’m sure I’ll be fine getting my things set up.”

Hope and vindication sprang into Jaycee’s eyes as she looked at her mom. “Please. Can I go now?”

A moment and Mrs. Lawrence sighed. “Fine. Go.”

“Awesome.” And that’s all it took for Jaycee to be out of the room.

“But be back by seven!” Mrs. Lawrence called.

“Will do.” And a door somewhere on the other side of the house banged closed.

Mrs. Lawrence looked down at Ryder who was still staring at Sage with a goofy look on his face. “Ryder, why don’t you show Sage to the guest room?” Then her gaze came back up to Sage. “It’s not much of a guest room. It’s honestly my sewing room, but we’ve moved some things around, and there’s a daybed in there.”

“I’m sure it will be lovely.”

Lovely it was not. Cramped, crumpled and befuddled came much closer. The cabinet didn’t even close for all the scraps of cloth sticking out of it, and Sage had no desire to open the closed closet doors to find out what else might be in there.

“Like I said,” Mrs. Lawrence continued, “it’s not much.” She worked on fixing and fluffing the daybed which didn’t help at all.

The bedspread was lime-green and white striped with small pink flowers on it. Sage didn’t even want to contemplate how old it might be. Her skin crawled just thinking about sleeping there.

“We freed up a little room in the closet.” Pushing the things in the closet back, Mrs. Lawrence stepped back to show Sage who wondered what she was going to do with the eight suitcases of stuff waiting in the van.

“It’s wonderful,” Sage said with a smile, wondering how she could even say the words.

“Ryder,” her father said from the doorway, “why don’t we go get Sage’s things?”

In a daze, Ryder followed his father out.

“Don’t mind him,” Mrs. Lawrence said when they were gone. “He’s just discovered that girls are on the planet.”

“He seems very sweet.” Sweet. It was how her voice sounded, and she was having great difficulty trying to force it not to crack right down the center.

“We’re so glad you’re here. Gregory was thrilled when your mom called about this.”

Sage was still a little fuzzy on the details of how her banishment had come to be, but she smiled and nodded as if she knew every fact by heart. “I’m glad it worked out.”

“Ryder!” her father’s hushed voice traveled with nearly no trouble down the hall and right to her.

“I’m just saying. How much stuff can one person need?”

Horror and surprise coursed across Mrs. Lawrence’s face as she rushed for the door. “I’ll just go help the guys.”

“No. I’m being serious. She looks like a Barbie doll. Perfect hair, perfect nails, perfect makeup. It’s like she’s made of plastic.” Jaycee was transferring the lettuce into the refrigerator from the bags on the counter, and Luke was becoming a bit concerned that it might be both bruised and shredded in the process. “I think her hair is made of real platinum. And you should have seen Ryder. His tongue was practically hanging out. Ugh.”

“Well, at least she’s not an ogre.” Not that he was trying to help, but Luke knew that wasn’t going to sit well.

“And you should have seen Dad. He looked like someone could snap a flashbulb in his face and he wouldn’t have even noticed. And Mom, oh my gosh, she was just… ‘this needs dusted… put this away… fluff these pillows… why didn’t you dust this?’  It’s a good thing I had to come here, or someone was going to be put out of their misery in that house.”

Finished with the lettuce, she turned and put her hands over the back pockets of her jeans. “What else?”

“We need to get the trash bags in the cans, and the plates and plastic ware out on the line.”

“Got it.”

Luke watched her as he worked to get things in order in the kitchen for the next morning’s marathon cooking session. Efficient. Hardworking. Down-to-earth. All the things he’d always thought he would want in a girl. The smile that crossed his heart was sad and futile. No, Jaycee Lawrence would never see him like that, and he really didn’t blame her. What did he have to offer in the boyfriend department anyway?

He wasn’t the guy who stood out in the class pictures, and he was as apt to make a goofy move as to make a smooth one. Truth was, he admired her taste in not choosing him. She was smart enough to know he wasn’t worth the time or the effort. Pushing those thoughts back and away, he finished up at the sink and went to take care of the trash on his own. Even Jaycee shouldn’t have to be subjected to that job.

Ten seconds after they left her to the room, Sage yanked out her cell and typed like her life depended on it, which it almost certainly did. She had to get out of here. She could act with the best of them, but this place would require more than acting. Mom. I made it. I know we talked about me going to stay with Aunt Anna as well this summer. Can we talk about doing that sooner rather than later? PLEASE!

She hit send and sat very gently on the edge of the bed. It squeaked with the movement. Pulling up the next number in her phone, she sent a text to Patelyn and then one to McKenzie. Desperation texts, meant to explain the horrible plight she now found herself in. There was no mall here, no shopping centers that she had seen. There was one grocery store that they passed on the way through town, and it had cars with actual dents in them sitting there.

Her fingers told the sad, sad tale of just how far she had fallen in the world, and the more she typed, the worse it got. When she finished, she considered letting the tears start, but she didn’t dare. First off, they would surely ruin her makeup. Secondly, if anyone knew she was crying… Well, they couldn’t know. She would put on the Wentworth charm until she could escape this disaster, and then she would leave and all things Lawrence would be forever behind her, a sad chapter in her life that she would never have to think of again.

With that thought, she glanced across the room at her luggage stacked there. It was pointless to unpack. She wouldn’t be here long enough to make it worth the effort.

Chapter 2

Dinner was on the table—the table that was actually in the kitchen. There was no dining room, and Sage thought she might actually be sick over the thought. Who ate in the kitchen? It was inhumane. Wait until her mother heard this. She surely would have Sage on a plane by the next day at the very latest.

“So, Sage,” Mrs. Lawrence said, passing a bowl of bread her direction. Sage quietly passed it on to Ryder. Carbs did very bad things to her concept of self-image. “You will be a senior in the fall?”

“Yes. I have one more year left, and then it’s off to college for me.” Sage was proud of her ability to sound light and airy about the topic. Half of a giggle put a stamp on the statement.

“Have you thought about schools? Um, colleges… universities?”

“Well, I’ve thought about Berkley. Of course, Dad… uh, Jason is pushing for Brown. That’s where he went. Mom doesn’t want me to go Ivy since that means being so far away.”

“Those are all really good schools.” Mrs. Lawrence looked to her husband as if to express she needed help carrying the conversation.

“Hm. So are you interested in moving away?” he asked, still sounding like he was being strangled when he spoke to her.

“I’m not sure.” She spooned up some of the yellow squash stuff but didn’t eat it. Her diet was going to go great here. Appetizing this meal was not. “It sounds romantic… uh, adventuresome, but then again, a lot of things sound wonderful until you get there and reality doesn’t quite match up to the dreams.”

Praying she could get the bite down with everyone looking at her, she took it, chewed, smiled, and fought with everything in her not to grimace. “Mmm. Mrs. Lawrence, you must give me the recipe for this delicious dish. I think Margaret would love it.”

“Margaret?” her father asked.

“Our cook. Oh, she makes the most divine gnocchi. It’s simply to die for.” This on the other hand was death in a much different context. She willed her stomach not to revolt as she took a bite of what appeared to be carrots. They were orange, so carrots was a good guess.

“So do you know any stars?” Ryder suddenly asked, piping up from across the table.

“Stars?” Sage put on her best sparkly demeanor. “Like Hollywood stars?”

“Yeah. Like that.”

She noticed but tried not to how he talked with food in his mouth.

“She lives in Beverly Hills, Ry,” Jaycee said, jumping into the middle of the conversation with her usual anti-cheerfulness. “Not Hollywood.”

“Actually,” Sage checked her half-sister with a soft questioning look, “I met Cameron Jenkins at a party last year.”

Ryder’s eyes widened. “From ‘Bad Boys’?”

“The one and only.” Sage didn’t bother to tell him that Cameron was a real jerk or that his hero as a junkie. It was the image he was most interested in anyway. Most people were like that—they had a picture of their stars, and like many things about reality, what was real was far less glamorous than the fantasy.

“So how are your parents?” Mrs. Lawrence asked. “They are going on a cruise?”

“And then on a trek through Europe. Daddy… hm, Jason promised Mom he would take her around the world for her birthday this year.”

“It sounds so romantic. A cruise. Paris in the summer.”

“Sounds like a waste of money to me,” Jaycee said.

“Jaycee Marie,” Mrs. Lawrence hissed.

However, Jaycee just shrugged. “What? It does.”

If her stepsister could be more openly insolent, Sage didn’t really want to know how. She was hardly what anyone would call accommodating or welcoming. After dinner, she practically threw the towels for the bath at Sage, and every conversation was punctuated with either sarcasm or dismissal.

So once again when she was in her room later, Sage took out her cell phone and sent another S.O.S. to her mother. If she didn’t get her out of this situation and fast, Sage was going to be forced to take matters into her own hands.

They had, after all, given her a line of credit in case of an emergency, and it was looking more and more like an emergency situation all the time.

The knock on her door yanked her attention up, and she found herself looking at her father who looked both apologetic and awkward. “I just wanted to make sure you have everything you need. Pillows, towels, blankets?”

Sage was proud of herself for her ability to lie through her teeth and doing it with a smile. “Everything’s just peachy.”

He regarded her a moment and then nodded. “Okay. Well, let us know if you need anything.”

She smiled brightly. “Of course I will.”

Another nod and he ducked out with a soft ‘night, and instantly Sage went back to her frantic get-me-out-of-here texts.

Saturday morning dawned bright and sunny. Luke was thankful for that. Rain was in the forecast for later that evening, a chance of it anyway, and he hoped if it did rain, it would hold off until after the noon meal because if it didn’t, they would have an extra hour of cleaning up the tracked-in mud. He’d done that more than once, and he didn’t want a repeat.

He made it to the church kitchen at just after 9:30. Pastor Steve and Ms. P were already supervising no one.

“Morning,” Luke said to both of them as he entered through the back kitchen door.

“Oh, good morning, Luke,” Pastor Steve, a man in his early forties, said, extending his hand.

“Now I’m sure you’re not forgetting my hug,” Ms. P said, holding her arms out. Luke obliged the proffered embrace though sideways and with some tinting of his ears a shade of pink he could feel.

“So do you want me to chop up the lettuce?” he asked.

“Tomatoes too,” Ms. P said with a hearty laugh. “I’m hoping you won’t be the only one to show.”

He took out the cutting board and one of the extra-large salad bowls. “Nah, Jaycee’s coming. She helped me with the stuff last night.”

“Oh, good. We’ll probably have 200 or more. Things just seem to be tight all over these days. Lots of good folks who need lots of help.” Ms. P went to work washing the lettuce and tomatoes and laying them out for him. “Right Pastor?”

“Absolutely. Too many folks in that category these days. It’s a blessing that the church can help as much as we do.”

They continued to talk about the plight of the community and the folks who lived there. Luke just listened and worked. He couldn’t do much about any of it, but he could do this. So he would.

“You should take Sage today,” her mother said as Jaycee ate cornflakes at warp speed.

“What? Ugh. Come on, Mom. Seriously? Sage and volunteering? I don’t think the two of them exactly go together.” Jaycee pulled her foot up next to her thigh on the chair and continued crunching.

“Now, you don’t know that. She seems very nice. Maybe you are misjudging her.”

“Misjudging her? Hello. Did you see her last night? It’s like she’s in some display case all the time. I’d bet you money she doesn’t come out of that room in anything but full dress and makeup.”

Her mother turned and leaned on the counter and put her hands on her hips which perfectly accompanied the scowl on her face. “I would really appreciate it if you would give her a chance. That’s all I’m asking. I know your dad would appreciate it as well.” The scowl dropped even further. “And taking her with you won’t kill you either.”

“Is that an order?”

“Maybe it is.”

Sage took one more long breath before breezing into the kitchen which was lit with beams from the sun streaming in through the east window. “Good morning to everyone.”

Mrs. Lawrence was the first to react as she straightened from the sink counter. “Oh, good morning, Sage. You look lovely this morning.”

Of course she did. Why was there ever any reason not to? She had dressed in her white chiffon blouse over skin-tight leopard-inspired leggings that hugged her figure perfectly.

Over her bowl of little golden things, Jaycee snorted, and Mrs. Lawrence sent a glare her direction. It was perfectly clear that her stepsister hadn’t acquired taste nor decorum overnight.

Willing a bright smile onto her face, Sage regarded her stepsister. “Good morning, Jaycee.” She was going to make a comment about how lovely she looked, but upon closer inspection, Jaycee was in threadbare lounge pants that were no match at all for the skin-hugging gray T-shirt she wore. Her hair was up in an ungodly twisted thing, and she looked like she’d been sunning on a rock and came inside way too early.

“I hope you had a good night’s sleep, Sage,” Mrs. Lawrence said, and Sage fought to show no signs of the grimace at the thought of the lumpy, uneven daybed that was in her current prison cell.

“Oh, of course. It is so quiet out here. It’s positively provincial.”

“That’s us,” Jaycee said. “We’re nothing if not provincial.”

Sage’s face fell into a frown that she didn’t quite catch fast enough; however, she recovered quickly.

“Oh, would you like some cornflakes for breakfast?” Mrs. Lawrence asked, and Sage sorted through all the ways she could ask just what that was and then politely decline.

“Well. I usually prefer eggs Benedict on Saturday mornings.”

“Eggs… Benedict?” Mrs. Lawrence sounded both confused and concerned.

“But if that’s too much trouble…”

“Oh, no. It’s not too much trouble at all. I’ll just…” Mrs. Lawrence nodded. “I’ll be right back.”

Jaycee ducked over her bowl, crunching loudly and clearly trying not to laugh outright.

“Is something humorous?” Sage asked, not fully understanding just how to defend herself from this passive-aggressive attack Jaycee had clearly perfected.

Tucking her lips between her teeth, Jaycee shook her head. “No. Not at all. Why would you think that?”

Sage wanted to ask again because it was clear she was being laughed at if not worse, but she didn’t dare. With Mrs. Lawrence gone, Jaycee might actually have the courage to say what she wasn’t saying out loud, and Sage wasn’t at all sure how to respond to a full-on attack.

Standing in the sunlit kitchen, unsure of what to do, she watched without watching as Jaycee munched her way through the bowl of whatever it was. How anyone could sit and be so unkempt was something Sage would never, ever understand. Presenting oneself to the world, even if that world was just your family on Saturday morning involved taking at least a bit of pride in oneself. Jaycee was about the polar opposite of that.

Mrs. Lawrence came back in, a computer print-out in hand. “I’m afraid we’re going to have to wait until next Saturday to tackle the Eggs Benedict. How about poached ones for today?”

Poached? That sounded completely unappetizing. “It sounds wonderful.”

“Luke, we had some clothing donations brought in during the week,” Pastor Steve said. “Would you mind going to the church office and bringing them over?”

“Sure thing.” Luke left his task of chopping the basil and parsley for the spaghetti sauce with two swipes of his hands. “I’ll be right back, Mrs. P.”

“Just don’t go getting lost, sugar.”

“I won’t. I promise.”

With that, he headed out into the bright sunlight beyond the solid metal door. The church office was across the parking lot from the community center where the meal would be served. Since congregation members knew about the weekly outreach meals, they often dropped off spare items in case someone else could use them. Luke was just glad it wasn’t the two-ton couch someone had dropped off one time.

The air hung in a muggy blanket over everything. It always did that when there was too much moisture for the air to hold but not enough for it to fall. He hustled across the parking lot and was thankful for the blast of cool air that whooshed over him when he opened the door to the office.

“Morning, Mildred,” he called to the elderly secretary. He had made the mistake of assuming she had heard him one too many times and nearly sent her to the emergency room once.

“Oh, good morning, son. Are you here to get the clothing?”

“That I am.” He leaned on the counter that was split from where she sat by a large solid piece of glass that slid to the side when she was on duty.

“Oh, well, come on back then.”

Ducking back around the opening, he went to the other side of the office.

“We have several today,” Mildred said. “And they are very heavy. I thought I could move them to a better location the other day. Found out the limits of my strength which isn’t much.” She chuckled at her own joke.

“Well, I’ll bet I can manage.” Sure enough he hefted both boxes from the floor. Yes, they were heavy enough to stretch his arms out the full-length, but it was more awkward than heavy.

“Here, let me get the door.” She went for the office door, which was already propped open but not fully.

“Thank you kindly, Ma’am.”

“Thank you. I don’t know what this church would do without you young folks helping out. Just gladdens my heart the way you pitch in.”

Luke smiled, hoping she wouldn’t go into a long speech because the boxes could decide to get heavy if they wanted to. “I’d better get these over to the center.”

“Yes. Pastor Steve has plans for them I’m sure.”

“As usual.” Luke hoisted the boxes up again and headed out into the sunshine beyond the tinted glass door. He was halfway across the parking lot when trouble came barreling at him, turning and stopping not four feet in front of him. Squelching the sigh and mustering up as much patience as he could, he watched Rory Harris pull up in his tricked out red Dodge pickup, and just in case Luke didn’t get the message that Rory was on a power trip, he revved the engine making the pickup bounce. He hit the window until his sickly suave face came into full view.

“Hey, there choirboy, whatcha doing?” Rory’s smirk could have easily provoked Luke into something very unhealthy if he let it, so he had learned not to let it in the 13 years they had been in school together.

“I don’t have time for this, Harris.” Luke resettled the boxes on his knee to keep them up and then jerked them up into his hands once more. “Can you move that thing? You’re in my way.”

Rory’s smirk deepened as he bounced the pickup again much to the delight of his passenger, Trey Fenton. “Make me.”

Patience threatened to slide away from him, but Luke knew where the lines were in this reality, and he was on the wrong side of them. “Quit being a jerk, Harris. Why is that so hard for you?”

“Quit being a jerk, Harris,” Rory mocked back. “Good news is I can change anytime. Too bad you’re stuck being a loser.” His laugh was derisive and cruel. “You know what they say once a pantywaist always a pantywaist, right?”

Trey laughed as if that was the funniest thing he’d ever heard.

It took everything in Luke to hold onto his temper, but here, in the middle of the church parking lot was not exactly the best place in the world to lay waste to Rory Harris and his big mouth. “Whatever. Would you move, so I can get on with life?”

“Life? Is that what you call that, choirboy? I think you should try getting you one ‘stead of making nicey-nice with the preacher all the time. What’re you trying out to be a saint? Saint Luke, saint of loser choirboys.”

At that moment across the parking lot, Jaycee’s little blue car pulled in. Luke’s gaze went over to it and then back to Rory. “Why don’t you stay and make yourself useful for a change?” He knew very well that would get Rory off the lot.

“Yeah. No. I don’t think so. See ya later, Saint Luke. Buh-bye.” And with a mocking wave, he headed out.

Luke watched him go, bracing himself for Jaycee’s hurt face when she asked why Rory hadn’t stayed. What she saw in that jerk was beyond him. He resettled the boxes and started over to her, but it was then that he realized she wasn’t alone. Slim and curved in all the right places, platinum blonde hair that waved down a perfectly porcelain face, Jaycee’s stepsister was runway perfect and then some as she stepped from the confines of the car.

“Hey, you made it.” He was smart enough to go to Jaycee’s side and direct his attention only at her. The last thing he needed was for fireworks to start from a fuse he’d inadvertently lit.

“We did.” Jaycee glanced across the hood of the car but replaced her gaze on him with nearly no pause. “Is Rory not staying?”

There it was, that look just before she took the top box from him.

“Uh, no. He had some things to go do.”

“Oh.” Why did she always have to sound so hurt? Why couldn’t she see Rory Harris for the jerk he was?

With the stepsister trailing behind them and no way to make a proper introduction, Luke walked with Jaycee to the doors of the hall. There he managed to catch the door and hold it open with his body for the young woman who had all the grace of a goddess. How high were those heels anyway?

“Oh, Luke, good.” Pastor Steve came over to them, leaving the serving line without a backward glance. “I thought we would put them over here.”

At a table to the side, Luke set his box down and then reached for Jaycee’s, but she yanked it away. “I’ve got it.”

He put his hands in the air. “Forgive me for trying to help.” Okay. It wasn’t her fault, but frustration with life was a hard thing to pull back when the train got to moving down that track.

Pastor Steve checked him with one, short look, and Luke knew he’d better dial it back.

Together they went about stacking the donated clothing on the table. They had most of it out before Luke sensed the shadow in the body-hugging leggings standing just behind them, not moving. His gaze jerked back to her, but it never really got that far because his brain kicked in at just that second and saved him from a fate worse than death—Jaycee’s undying wrath.

“Much better,” Pastor Steve said as he took one box and went to turn. It was then that he noticed her, and he yanked up short. “Oh, my. Hello.”

“Hello,” she said like smooth silk, honeysuckle, and moonlight all mixed together.

It even took a full second for Pastor Steve to regain his bearings. He stuck out his hand. “I’m Pastor Steve.”

“It’s very nice to meet you, Sir,” she said, her face brightening like she was meeting her dream idol.

“And you are…?” he prompted.

“Oh.” Her smile became a short laugh like the soft tinkling of bells. “Where are my manners? I’m Sage Wentworth, Jaycee’s stepsister.”

“Jaycee’s…” Pastor Steve turned back as if to question how the two of them could have come from the same gene pool. Then he turned back to Sage with a smile. “Well, it’s nice to have you here, Ms. Wentworth. Thank you so much for coming to help.”

“You’re welcome, Sir. I do what I can.”

With a dramatic sigh and roll of her eyes, Jaycee turned next to Luke with one box and reached for the box the pastor held. “Here, Pastor, let me get that for you.”

He relinquished the box into her care with nearly no glance at her at all. “Thank you, Jaycee. So, Sage…” With a duck of his head, he turned both of them for the kitchen and continued the conversation that went out of earshot in three steps.

Luke’s gaze went after them, and knowing he was in for the tongue-lashing of his life, he dragged it over to Jaycee who had stowed the boxes in the corner and was trekking over to him with a look of wanting to kill the next thing she saw move. He fought the grimace, but it didn’t work. “I take it this wasn’t your idea.”

Her eyes narrowed even further at him as her mouth dropped into a scowl. “Mom thought it would be such a good idea.” The scowl dropped further. “Not.”

Biting his lip, Luke tried to think of some encouraging something, but he was coming up emptier than the gas tank of his beat-up, fifteen-year-old sports car.

“I know. I know,” Jaycee said with a hard bite to the words. “I need to be nice to her, include her. You don’t have to say it. Mom already gave me the whole lecture.”

However, that wasn’t what he was going to say at all, but before he got the chance to sort through what he should say and how to say it, Jaycee heaved a sigh.

“We’d better go get to cooking. No use standing around here whining about my sucky life.” She took off before he got more words out, and fighting the urge to give her a hug which she wouldn’t appreciate, he followed her to the kitchen.

Across the threshold, they found Mrs. P ooing and ahing over Sage.

“Now ain’t you just the prettiest little thing I ever did lay eyes on.”

Luke’s gaze shot to Jaycee who was about to spit nails or eat them.

“I’m going into the back to get the bread ready,” she said, and every word sliced through the air like a sword. She didn’t give him the chance to ask if she needed help. Instead, she stomped to the back, and if he didn’t miss his guess, there were tears behind those dark glasses.

“Luke, honey,” Mrs. P said, breaking into the war going on in him over what to do, “can you come help me with these bags of noodles? My old fingers just don’t wanna cooperate today.”

Seeing no other option, he put his hand on the back of his neck and nodded with only one more glance at the door to the back. “Sure.”

Volunteering. Of course Sage had heard of it, but she’d never quite pictured this. If Patelyn and McKenzie saw her now, she would never live it down. The kitchen, if it could be called that, was an expansive room with burners to one side, a huge island in the middle, and a serving line to the other side. The décor itself left a lot to be desired, and Sage dared not touch anything or the grease from the surroundings would surely ruin her expensive SPR blouse for good.

“Yes, just set them right here, hon,” the rotund black lady with the hideous floral print not-chiffon top said. Sage suppressed a shiver at the memory of her skin being next to that material. It probably came from a dime store if not right off the giveaway rack.

Oh, how very, very far she had fallen.

“Ms. Sage,” the pastor said, bringing in two bags of plates from the storeroom, “would you mind helping me with the extra paper goods?”

Her mouth formed the word me, but it didn’t make it to the air. He couldn’t be serious, could he?

“We’ll need more cups and plastic ware.” And he disappeared through the door to the hall beyond.

Apparently he was. Sage dragged in a hard breath and wondered how she had gotten talked into this. Cups and plastic ware. That didn’t sound too hard. She started across the kitchen only to find another hallway on the other side. One way led to a lighted room, the other into near pitch black darkness. “Um?” Unsure, she glanced back into the kitchen for help but found neither the cook nor the guy in the awful brown plaid shirt looking at her. Nope. She was on her own with this one. “Okay.”

She turned back and just before she headed toward the light, she caught sight of Jaycee that direction, knife in hand, ripping into bread sacks.

“Oh, I’m sorry.” Pastor Steve returned. “I forgot you don’t know where we keep things.”

“No. I’m sorry. I don’t,” Sage said, sounding both light and apologetic.

“They’re right here.” He went down the opposite way of Jaycee, and for that, Sage was imminently grateful. In the small closet at the end of the hall, he produced two large bags of plastic cups which he handed to her. “Just take those out and put them at the end of the line.”

“The line,” she said with a nod that probably indicated she knew what he was talking about, which she didn’t. Back down the hallway and out into the kitchen she went, wondering just how many cups they might need.

“It’s this way,” and with that Pastor Steve led her out into the hall. “You can put them over there on that table. Have you ever made tea before?”

“Uh?” She nearly dropped the cups. “Tea?”

“Yes, you know tea—sweet tea, iced tea. The stuff you drink?”

“Oh. Uh, no. No I don’t think I’ve ever made tea before.”

At the other end of the serving line, he arranged the plastic ware. “Well, I guess it’s a good day to learn.”

As Pastor Steve tutored Sage on the fine art of tea making, Luke tried not to watch. Some of the attraction was how very out-of-place she looked; some was just that, to be honest, she was gorgeous. However, he berated himself for that thought as Jaycee came in pushing the cart with the bread on it. He snapped his gaze from them back to the task at hand and finished up opening the last of the sauce cans for Mrs. P.

“I’m beginning to think it’s just gonna be us today, Pastor,” Mrs. P said. She was chopping things to add to the salad. “That’s what summer does to us every year.”

“We’ve got the tea brewing,” the pastor said, coming over with Sage following if it could be called that. She looked so incredibly out of place, like she wanted to escape out the door if anybody gave her half a chance. “What do you need in here? Just tell us what to do.”

“Well, that sauce needs to go in these here pots. Then someone needs to start breaking up the spaghetti into these pans.”

“Do you just want the spaghetti in half?” he asked as Sage stood behind him, her arms crossed in front of her.

“That will be fine, Pastor.” Mrs. P continued to chop at the speed of light. “Why don’t you girls take care of the sauce? Luke, you can start on the lettuce.”

“Sure thing,” he said and headed for the refrigerator; however, the chill that went through the room had nothing whatsoever to do with the opening of the walk-in.

“I’ll get this,” Jaycee said, pushing in front of Sage who took a hesitant step toward the cans, her eyes wide. “Why don’t you do the spaghetti?”

However, Sage didn’t let herself be angled out of her designated position. “I can do the sauce.” She stepped toward Jaycee’s spot but didn’t get very far.

Jaycee took hold of one can and dumped it over into one of the pots, before using a spatula to clean out the inside as Luke returned with the bags of lettuce. “I’ve got this. Just go help with the spaghetti.”

“She said I could do the sauce.” Sage tried to get around Jaycee who was blocking access to the cans almost with no effort at all.

“Now girls,” Mrs. P said, seeing the oncoming train wreck much too late.

“I’m not five,” Sage said, grabbing for a can. “I can empty a can.”

“Sage, give me that.” Jaycee whirled and grabbed hold of the same can. “I said I’ve got this.”

“I said I would.”

“Girls!”

“Stop it!” Jaycee shrieked. “You’re going to make a mess.”

“Me? I’m not going to make a mess, you are. Let it go!”

And with that the can slung open between them, dousing both them and the surrounding kitchen in tart red-orange goop.

“UGH!” Sage said, her hands going out as she looked down at her now-ruined white blouse and formerly stylish pants.

“What did you do that for?” Jayce demanded as she slammed the can onto the cabinet, make a fountain of what was left of the sauce. She wiped the goo from her glasses and face. “I said I would get it.”

“And I said…”

“I don’t care what anybody said to anybody else.” Mrs. P suddenly stood between them. “I don’t care who done said what to whom. I want both of you out of my kitchen.” She pointed at the door, but neither of them moved. “Now!”

The word jolted even Luke who shrank over his own task at the far end of the counter and fought to become invisible. In a huff and still arguing without even really talking to each other, they exited.

“I don’t know what this world is coming to.” Mrs. P retrieved the spatula from the floor and slung it into the sink near Luke at the end of the cabinet. “Like two four-year-olds in a sandbox those two.” She stopped muttering and looked over the mess clearly about to lose her patience or just start crying.

“Here,” Luke said, all but jumping around the cabinet. “Let me get this, Mrs. P. Really. I can clean this up. I’ll get the sauce in the pots and get it going, and then you can work your magic on it just like always.” And in the next heartbeat, he was doing just that heedless of the absolute disaster the kitchen now was in around him.

“What was that called?” In the ladies’ room, Jaycee yanked her glasses off and held them out from her, looking like she might actually try to clean them with her now-tomato-stained shirt tail. “UGH!”

“That was called trying to help.” Sage took one look at herself in the mirror and wanted to cry. Red streaks now dripped off her hair in uneven, hideous patterns. The stuff was all over her clothes and even on her shoes. “Ugh. Look at this mess.”

“Yeah, a mess you created.” Jaycee went to the sink and turned on the tap full blast. Removing the clip and holder from her hair, she put her whole head under the water and proceeded to wash out her hair in the very public sink.

Sage couldn’t stomach the thought of doing that. Instead, she grabbed ten paper towels from the towel holder and started dabbing at and then rubbing on her blouse. That only succeeded in smearing the stuff everywhere.

Coming up for air, Jaycee leveled a not kind nor impressed look at her. “What did you do that for?”

“What did I do now?” Sage held the orange-stained paper towels away from her body, stopping the rubbing that was becoming increasingly panicked.

“You’re using all the towels. Those things cost money and waste trees, you know?” Going over to the hand dryer, she punched it on and whipped her hair under it.

“Oh, like using electricity is going to save the planet. Puh-lease.” Sage recommenced wiping the sauce from her attire, but it was doing no good at all. Abandoning that pursuit, she went to work on her face instead, which wasn’t any more successful. “Ugh. This stuff is awful.”

“Knock. Knock.” A thin lady about Mrs. Lawrence’s age stepped in, took one look at them, and stifled a laugh. “Oh, my.”

“Don’t start,” Jaycee said, straightening from the dryer.

“Steve sent me. He thought you two could use these,” the lady said. She came all the way in then and handed Jaycee one of the bundles she held before turning to hand Sage the other.

“What’re these?” The second the thing unfurled in her hands, abject horror hit Sage like a knockout punch. “Oh, I couldn’t wear…”

“Stuff the pride,” Jaycee said, disappearing into a stall. “It won’t kill you to put it on.”

“I washed them all last night,” the lady said. “So they are clean.”

Truly, truly, Sage wanted to cry. She really, really did. Her gaze traced up helplessly to the woman who stood looking at her as if she understood completely.

“There.” Jaycee made a triumphant return in a celery green polo shirt that was probably bought for a man twice her size 20 years before. “See. It’s not so bad.” She went back to the sink, wound her hair up into the ponytail holder and then the clip. “Thank you, Mrs. Mitchell.”

“You’re welcome, Jaycee.” The lady smiled at Sage’s stepsister who grabbed her tomato-stained shirt from the sink and headed out.

“I’d better get back to help clean up the mess.” With that, Jaycee yanked the door open and left.

Nothing and no one moved for a full ten seconds as Sage pleaded with the woman to think of another solution. Finally, Mrs. Mitchell gave Sage a tentative smile. “I hear you’re Jaycee’s sister.”

“Yeah—yes, Ma’am. I am. Stepsister.” Not that that was anything to be proud of or excited about at the moment or ever.

However, the lady stuck out her hand. “I’m Jane Mitchell, Pastor Steve’s wife.”

“Oh.” Wow, was it hard to get graciousness and manners over this one. “It’s very nice to meet you.” Sage shook the woman’s hand, noticing how unassuming she was. Just about her own height with dark hair that had no real style to it, dark glasses, though not as harsh as Jaycee’s, and an outfit she probably bought at a flea market, Mrs. Mitchell was hardly the height of fashion.

“I know it’s not great,” she said, nodding to the cloth in Sage’s hand. “But it’s all we had on such short notice.”

Sage lifted her eyebrows and fought the desire to cry that rose in her like a tsunami. “I don’t think even I can pull this one off.” Her smile spoke of desperation and despair.

“Ah, a pretty girl like you? I’m sure you’ll be able to make it work.” This smile inexplicably lifted Sage’s spirits. “Now come on. Let’s get you out of this tomato get up because, girl, this look does nothing for your skin color.”

Chapter 3

Luke wanted to ask, but with the kitchen to clean, sauce to make, noodles to boil, and Mrs. P about one wrong move away from a full-blown conniption, he didn’t dare. Instead, he spent the next 30 minutes or so jumping every time Mrs. P looked like she might need something. He was just finishing wiping the floor when he caught sight of Sage helping Mrs. Mitchell take out the lettuce bowls and salad dressing bottles from the refrigerator.

Jaycee was working the drinks. That’s what Pastor Steve had said anyway. That was good. At least they weren’t working in the same area.

“Luke, honey, can you carry this pot out there? I think we’re about ready to start,” Mrs. P said, and sure enough, he heard the increase of noise from the other side of the wall right on time. “The Pastor done opened the doors. We’d better get a move on.”

Two other girls from the youth group had shown up, and they grabbed the spaghetti pots and butter. Luke led them out to the serving line where he dumped the sauce into the warmers. The crowd was amassing like a swell of geese coming in for feeding.

“If I could have your attention, please,” Pastor Steve said from the end of the serving line. It took a minute for the hush to come, but it did. “I’d like to offer grace over the meal. If you would kindly remove any head covering.”

Luke never had to worry about that, but the pastor went through the same routine every time because folks who weren’t used to praying over meals didn’t always know the protocol. Bending his head, Luke half listened to the pastor and half tipped his head enough to look at first Sage and then Jaycee. They were both in different shirts though Jaycee didn’t look nearly as put together as Sage did. “Amen,” he echoed with the crowd.

Quickly he grabbed up the pot and headed back for the kitchen.

“How many you think we have?” Mrs. P asked.

“Couple hundred it looks like.” He’d gotten very good at guestimating over the years, and that’s always what it was – somewhere between a guess and an estimate.

“I just hope we’re going to have enough sauce,” she said with worry, and Luke came over to put his arm around her.

“Loaves and the fishes, Ms. P,” he said with a grin. “Loaves and the fishes. Jesus did that miracle once, surely He can do a repeat performance with spaghetti and a little sauce.”

Her grin was more reluctant. “Oh, you. I should’ve known you wouldn’t let some tomato-sauce disaster get you down.”

“Aaa.” He leaned back and shook his head. “Gonna take a lot more than that to keep us down.”

She nodded. “Why don’t you get to stirring the rest of that sauce? I’ll finish up these noodles.”

“Works for me.” Obediently, Luke went to work stirring the sauce. He took a glance at his watch. 12:15. Right on time. Yep. It would take a lot more than a tomato sauce disaster to stop God from feeding His people.

Sage was trying not to get a headache from the situation and the smell. Oh, the smell of humanity. Did these people not shower?

“Sage, we need more lettuce,” Mrs. Mitchell called from the end of the line. “There’s more in the fridge.”

“Okay,” she said, grinding a smile onto her face as if she really was glad to do this. Turning, she went back into the kitchen, and the fact that the cook didn’t want her anywhere near the cooking was not lost on Sage. She skirted the kitchen, keeping an extremely low profile, or hoping she was anyway. At the refrigerator, she opened it and peered inside. Salad. Salad. Salad. Lettuce. It had to be there somewhere.

“Looking for something?” the guy in the plaid shirt came over to her, wiping his hands on a cloth rag and tossing it to the cabinet.

“Oh. Um.” Sage spun like she’d been caught robbing from the collection plate. She pinched her teeth together as if asking would get her shot. “Lettuce?”

“We’re out already?” he asked, and she wondered how to answer that.

“Um… yes? Mrs. Mitchell said to bring more?”

He shook his head which had longish sandy brown hair at the top. “Hope we’re going to have enough.” Instead of going to the refrigerator where she stood, he turned and went to the back corner of the kitchen and disappeared into a large white metal thing.

Concerned but unsure of if to follow him or not, Sage waited, praying a cloak of invisibility over herself so the cook wouldn’t notice her.

“Here you go,” the guy said coming back out with two bags. “When that runs low, we’re going to have to switch to plain lettuce.”

She took the bags from him and nodded. “I’ll tell Mrs. Mitchell.” And with that she ducked, turned, and hurried out. “Here’s the lettuce.”

“Oh, thank you, Sage. You’re a lifesaver.”

“Miss?” a small elderly lady said from the other side of the line, “could you carry this for us?”

Just behind her stood a stooped over man pushing a walker.

“Me?” Sage asked barely squelching the abject horror and disbelief.

“I’ve got this, Sage,” Mrs. Mitchell said. “Why don’t you help Mr. and Mrs. Andrus?”

Sage let out a breath that snagged somewhere between her lungs and her ribcage. “Oh, of… of course. Certainly.” She went around the table and awkward hit like a freight train. She’d never helped anyone in her life. What did they expect her to do?

“If you can get his plate,” Mrs. Andrus said, nodding at her husband’s paper plate setting on the table, “and if you could get him some tea as well. That would be wonderful.”

Plate. Sage picked it up, and had to squelch the thoughts that streamed through her head at the sight of that tomato sauce. If she never saw tomato sauce again in her life, it would be too soon. She followed the lady five steps.

“Tea,” Mrs. Andrus reminded her.

“Tea. Of course,” Sage parroted. She went over and had to juggle the plate and plastic ware to get the plastic cup of tea. “Sugar…?” But when she turned, they were already gone, headed down a long, thin aisle between tables and chairs. “Oh. I guess not.”

Thankfully Jaycee had gone in search of something because Sage hated the thought of what her stepsister might say about this situation. Pride? It was such a strange word at the moment. She followed the two down the aisle to where they were shifting and working to get seated. Once he was down, she put the plate in front of him and situated the glass, knife, fork, and spoon as well.

“Thank you, dear,” the woman said in a shaky but kind voice.

“Um, you’re… you’re welcome.” Unsure what to do next, Sage stood for ten seconds and then turned to go back up the aisle. However, there were three other people shifting and shuffling into their own chairs there.

She yanked in a hard breath and fought to keep control of the rising panic. It was as if the world was closing in on her.

Two seconds before she thought she would actually be sick, the sea parted, and she fled for safety.

“Oh, Sage, good you’re back,” Mrs. Mitchell said. “Could you bring these to the first table?” She handed her two glasses of water. “The gentlemen there couldn’t carry everything.”

It was as if someone had mispunched the line on her card that told everyone else her station in life. She wasn’t the help. She was Sage Wentworth. Socialite. What was she doing here?

Stifling that question as best as she could, she went over to the table Mrs. Mitchell had indicated.

“Miss, could I get a refill?” an elderly man with no teeth asked, holding up his cup.

Barely swallowing the aversion, she set the other two glasses down and accepted his, trying to grip it between only two fingers. “Sure.” Her mother was going to pay dearly for this one.

By one-thirty, Luke was no longer thinking, just reacting. They needed more salad dressing and more spaghetti. Did they have any more bread? What about butter?

Generally they had at least five other people helping. Today, not so much. He raced one way, grabbing, fixing, solving, filling. Whatever someone needed, he did.

The tide began to roll back out around two o’clock, and he was very thankful because they were down to their last couple of plates of spaghetti. There wouldn’t even be enough for them to eat today as there sometimes was, but that was okay. God had provided just enough for the multitudes. That was all that really mattered.

“I think we’re about to wind this down, Sugar,” Mrs. P said as she rinsed out a colander. “Why don’t you go consolidate anything you can on the line and start bringing things back here to wash up?”

It was hard to swallow the tired sigh, but he did just the same. “Sure thing.”

Out on the line, he surveyed everything as Rachel, one of the other teen volunteers, served a last straggler.

“I’m going to take this,” Luke said to her as he pulled one metal well of sauce out. There wasn’t even enough to make another serving left in there.

“Fine by me. We’re about out of everything.”

That he could tell. Just as he headed for the kitchen with the pan in hand, Sage came out through the door, very nearly crashing right into him.

“Hold up!” he said, yanking to a stop. He looked at her and couldn’t stop the grin. In the orange T-shirt that was 3 sizes too big, she looked like a traffic cone. “Looks like they put you to work.”

“Yeah,” and she didn’t look overly thrilled about that at all. “Yay me.”

Swallowing the snarky comeback that jumped to his mind, Luke traced around behind her as she walked out of the kitchen, and he made a beeline for the sink. “I’m going to start breaking the line down if that’s okay.”

“Sounds good to me, Sugar. Don’t nobody come after about two anyway.”

Luke set the pan by the sink and headed back out, only to meet Sage coming back the other way looking not one ounce happier than she had the first time. “Well, we meet again,” he said, backing out of her way.

“It must be destiny.” She sounded so dire about it, Luke didn’t have the heart to laugh.

“Must be.”

However, right in front of him, she stopped completely and put her hands on her hips. “Do you have any idea where the trash bags are? Pastor Steve needs more, and I’m kind of afraid to go back into that storage room alone.”

He laughed at that. “What? Afraid you’ll get eaten?”

Her perfect eyebrows raised as she peered up at him. “With my luck today? Nothing would surprise me.”

This laugh came with no effort at all. “Sure. Come on. I’ll save you from the storage room monster.”

Sage was too grateful to think how this might look to whom. She needed trashbags. He knew where they were. End of story.

She followed him to the back and into the darkened hallway where he pulled a box from the storage closet.

“Here you go,” the guy said, handing the box to her as he snapped off the light in the storage room, plunging that part of the hallway back into darkness.

“My hero.” She was looking back and up at him as they came out of the hallway into the kitchen, where they met Jaycee coming the other direction.

“Oh!” Jaycee pulled up short, at first to avoid running into them, but then seeming to realize who they were. “Oh.” That one sounded darker, angrier, and Sage didn’t want any part of what came next.

“Well, I’d better get these out there to the good pastor,” Sage said, holding up the box.

“Yeah,” plaid-shirt shirt guy said with only one glace her direction. “You should.”

Oh, to be able to flee like Sage had. Luke wanted to do that with everything in him, but he couldn’t. He didn’t dare.

“Really?” Jaycee folded her arms in front of her.

“What?” he asked, both innocently and with an edge to it. He jerked his head backward toward the hallway. “Come on, Jayc. Seriously. I was getting her trashbags.”

She nailed him with a deep glare. “Oh? Is that what they’re calling it these days?”

Luke barely held the frustration in. “You cannot be serious. I don’t even know her. And you know me. I’m not into playing spin the bottle in the storage closet with some girl I just met.”

Jaycee’s face softened a tiny bit, and Luke saw his opening.

“Come on, Jayc. You’re being just a touch ridiculous here, don’t you think? However, I do have to say you are rocking this moldy-mustard green number.” Reaching over he picked at the shoulder of her shirt.

Instantly the knives in her eyes were back. “Ha. Ha.”

“Seriously, Jayc. This isn’t you. You have got to uncoil a little bit or you’re going to snap.”

She didn’t look happy about it, but her arms unwound just the same. “I guess you’re right. It’s just that… she makes me crazy.”

“I can see that.” He nodded. “Tell you what. They’re having a bonfire tonight out at Chester’s. What do you say, we go out there, eat s’mores until our teeth fall out and chill-ax a little bit?” Pulling her into a hug, he held her there.

“With double marshmallow?” she asked like a little kid.

“Whatever you want.”

The ride home had been about as peaceful as the entire day, and by the time they made it back to the Lawrence residence, Sage thought her head might actually explode.

“Well, that was enjoyable,” Jaycee said as she pulled up next to the little garage.

“I’m glad you thought so.” Sure, Sage shouldn’t be mean, but what good did it do to hold onto animosity when Jaycee was more than happy to let the arrows fly?

When the car was off, Jaycee didn’t get out right away. Instead she heaved a breath and glanced over at Sage. “I’m sorry. About today. I guess… I guess I should have let you help with the sauce.”

Sage shrugged. “I’m sorry too. I was just trying to help.”

“I know. But next time, can you try just a little less hard?” Reaching up, Jaycee ran her fingers over her hair. “I’m going to be washing this tomato smell out for a month.”

“Noted,” Sage said, and they both climbed out. It was truly unbelievable how tired she was. Every muscle hurt, and she had to will herself to follow Jaycee into the house.

In the backdoor, they met up with Mrs. Lawrence who was sorting through the laundry. “Oh, hi, girls. Did you all have fun?”

“Blast,” Jaycee said and stalked past her mother.

“Thrilling.” Sage followed but kept walking even when Jaycee stopped.

“Oh, I’m going out with Luke tonight,” Jaycee said to her mother as Sage headed through the kitchen. “There’s a bonfire out at Chester’s.”

Sage kept walking. Truth be known, she was ready for a shower and bed even though it was only four o’clock.

“Oh, great,” her mother said. “You can take Sage. She can meet everybody.”

How she kept her feelings from spilling all over the floor, Jaycee would never know. “No. Mom. I don’t want to take Sage. Not tonight. Not to this.”

Her mother stopped the folding. “Why not? Jaycee, we talked about this.”

“Because Mom. I don’t want her tagging around behind me all summer, that’s why. This is me with my friends. Not hers.”

“Well, how is she supposed to make friends if you don’t introduce her to anyone?”

“You know, that’s not really my problem.” Jaycee leaned on the doorframe, tired from the all-out battle she had been waging with life the whole day.

“Jaycee…”

“What? Mom. You spend five hours with her and see if you would want her tagging along everywhere. The voice alone will do you in.”

Clutching a tan T-shirt to her, her mother stopped and looked at her. “Okay. This one time, but after this, you need to include her.”

That was good enough for Jaycee. Next time, when there was a next time and there would be, she would talk her way out of that one too. No way was she spending her whole summer glued to the hip with Ms. Let-Me-Help.

There really were streaks of actual tomato sauce in Sage’s hair she realized with horror when she ducked to examine her reflection in the little mirror on the vanity next to the closet. No way would she ever tell Patelyn or McKenzie about this. They might disown her completely. She would if there was a way to do that.

Worse, she realized as she took a sniff of herself she smelled like the humanity she’d been forced to rub elbows with all day. A shiver went through her at the memory. No one should be subjected to that.

Carefully she sorted through her clothes still in the suitcases finally settling on her Vance Hall Jeans and a lightly sequined top. No reason to go all-out dressy if she was staying in. Crossing out into the hallway, she padded down it to the closed white door midway down. Well, this was a problem.

She waited a few seconds, leaned in to listen to see if she could ascertain who might be in there. Finally, she reached up, gathered her courage and knocked.

“It’s occupied!” Jaycee called back.

“Oh.” That stymied Sage. She’d never had to wait for grooming purposes before. “Um, how… how long will you be?”

“I’m taking a shower,” came the reply. “However long it takes to get this tomato smell out of my hair.”

“Oh,” Sage said again, dropping her hand and her voice. “Okay. Well…” She turned slightly and glanced one way down the hall and then the other. “Um. I guess I’ll just come back later then.”

“Yeah, you do that.”

Seeing no other option, Sage turned fully and forced her feet back down the hallway. Sharing a bathroom? This was going to be a major issue. Back in her room, she closed the door, set the clothes gently on the corner of the bed and sat down next to them. For a minute she simply rested her hands between her knees and looked around. The sound of water down the hall invaded the stillness.

No one was around to see, so she blew out a breath of frustration, which sent the one tendril of hair on her forehead spiraling upward. A moment and she looked around again. Now what?

With the way Jaycee was behaving it might be Christmas before she got into that bathroom, and until she took a shower, she wasn’t going to so much as touch the rest of her stuff. Finally, realizing there really wasn’t anything else to do, she laid over on the bed, grabbed the pillow, pulled her feet and knees onto the bed and was asleep in seconds.

When he pulled up at the Lawrence residence, Luke braced for a second War of the Stepsisters episode. His only hope was he could keep them separated and from throwing actual flaming things at each other. With a knock on the back door, he stood and waited ten seconds before Jaycee came flying out the door, very nearly smacking him in the nose with the screen.

“Luke’s here!  I’m gone! We’ll be back.” She was simultaneously striding and sliding her denim jacket on, and she never even stopped as she went right past him and down the sidewalk. With a half a turn she surveyed him. “You coming?”

“Uh. Oh.” He glanced back at the door, unsure he should follow so quickly if this was in fact a get-away her parents hadn’t sanctioned. “Um.” Swinging his foot, he stepped off the porch. “Is Sage not coming?”

“No.” At his car, Jaycee laughed a short, little derisive laugh. “Why would she?”

Luke wasn’t at all sure how to put his thoughts into words, so he didn’t. Instead, he went to his car and climbed in as Jayce got in the other way. He reached down to start the car. “Are you… Do you want to swing by Callahan’s before we go, or did you eat already?”

Jaycee shrugged and smiled. “I don’t care. It’s up to you.”

That was comforting. He scratched his nose, and carefully spun the car wheel before heading out.

How so much time had passed, Sage had no idea, but when she awoke again the light was fading in her room.

“Sage?” It was Mrs. Lawrence knocking at the door. “Honey, do you want to join us for supper?”

Supper? Already? She hadn’t even eaten lunch.

“Oh. Uh. Yeah… yes. I’ll… I’ll be right there.” When she sat up, the room did a topsy-turvy move that nearly pitched her onto the floor. “Wow.” She grabbed hold of the little bed post and worked on righting her world. “Okay. That was fun.”

Her hand went up to her hair, and she remembered then. There was no sound of the water anymore, and she wondered how long it had been off. With a wide yawn, she stood, blinked hard, and grabbed her clothes. No way was she going to the table in this—even if the table was in the kitchen.

Carefully she went to the door and out, the light on the other side threatening to blind her completely. “Wow. Okay.” At the door to the kitchen, she slowed her already slow steps, trying to hear from the voices who she might be facing on the other side. When she turned at the doorframe, three faces looked up from the table.

Mrs. Lawrence was the first to react. “Oh, Sage, honey. Were you sleeping? I’m sorry. I didn’t realize.”

“No. No. It’s fine. I just took a little nap.” Thankfully she counted everyone but Jaycee sitting there. “Um, if you don’t mind, I really need to take just a teeny-weeny really quick little shower. It’ll be fast. I promise.”

“Oh, no problem,” Mrs. Lawrence said. “Take your time. We can reheat yours if we need to.”

Only then did Sage glance down at the table. If it wasn’t so awful, she would have actually laughed. Spaghetti. It was a done-sure fact now. The universe truly was out to get her.

“I’ll have a cheeseburger and fries,” Luke said to Jessica, the waitress, a girl in his senior class.

“Great. And for you, Jaycee?” the sprite-like girl asked.

“Oh. Uh.” Jaycee wrenched her bottom lip to the side as if she hadn’t realized they would be ordering. “Um, how about some chili cheese fries, I guess.”

“Okay.” Jessica wrote that down and collected their menus. “I’ll be back.” She turned on her heel and left.

For a long minute Luke just waited in his own little patient world. He wanted to ask, but part of him said he had to be crazy for even thinking that thought. “I’m surprised….”

“Don’t start,” Jayce snapped. “Seriously. I don’t want to hear it.” On her side of the booth, she leaned back and anchored her arms at her chest. The only way the message could have been clearer was if she had taken a swing at him.

Nodding slowly, trying to think of something else to talk about, Luke sorted through everything and came up with nothing.

“I know,” Jaycee said, uncurling and putting her hands on the seat so when she pushed up her shoulders nearly touched her ears, “I’m acting like a two-year-old, but I can’t help it. She’s annoying with all her perfect hair and perfect clothes and amazing shoes.”

“You sound jealous.”

She considered that. “It’s not that. I don’t want to be her. I just don’t want her around.” Then she deflated. “That makes me a terrible person, I know.”

“Confused and very defensive, but not terrible.”

That brought her smile out from its hiding place, and she tossed the wrapper from her straw at him. “Judgmental much?”

He swiped a hand through one side of his hair. “Just calling it like I see it.”

The bells at the door of the establishment dinged, and Jaycee looked over, instantly hitting panic. She sat straight up and smoothed her hair and her jeans.

“How do I look?” she asked breathlessly. “Do I look okay?”

Luke rolled his eyes. He knew without even looking back at the door. Rory. With one glance, it was confirmed. “I don’t know what you see in that guy.”

“Well, he’s drop dead gorgeous for one thing.”

With a shrug Luke settled back in the booth. “Eh. I’ve seen better.”

Jaycee shot him a look. “You’re a guy.”

“Yes, and I have eyes and a brain. Rory Harris is not worth the DNA it took to make him.”

“Shhhh,” she hissed. “He’s coming this way.”

From his side, Luke’s eyes slid upward. This should prove to be more than a little unpleasant.

“Well, well, well, if it isn’t J.C.,” Rory said it as if her name was made up of the letters. “What’s up, girlfriend?”

This was already nauseating, and to make it worse, she actually giggled. “Hi, Rory.” Her fingers slipped down her hair as she angled her gaze up to him.

“What brings you… guys out this evening?” Rory put his foot on the booth seat next to Jaycee and his glance at Luke was at once condescending and dismissive.

She giggled again which was really starting to work Luke’s nerves over. “We’re going to Chester’s in a little while. Are you coming?”

Rory swept his head back so his hair fell in feathers across his eye. “Of course. I wouldn’t miss it. I’ll see you there?”

If he didn’t leave soon, Jayce was going to be a puddle of mush. “Yeah. We’ll be there.”

“Cool.” His foot slid off, and it ca-thunked on the ground. “Catch ya later, girlfriend.” He put both index fingers up and pointed them at her.

Yep, that puddle thing might happen any minute now.

Thankfully the jerk walked off, and Luke shook his head as he raised an eyebrow and surveyed Jaycee. How could someone so sane lose it so badly every time that idiot showed up? Luke waited for Rory to grab his takeout and leave before he broached the subject again. “You know, you really need to give that dream up, Jayc. Seriously, he’s just jerking you around with that girlfriend thing.”

“I don’t know.” The smile said Rory had made her whole night. “He’s nice. He’s sweet. I mean, he’s totally hot, that’s a given, but there’s just… something…”

Luke didn’t pursue it. There were things in this life he would never understand. Jaycee’s undying attraction to Rory Harris topped that list.

Jessica picked that moment to bring their food, and Luke was glad. Maybe now things could get back to normal.

“I’m really not that hungry,” Sage said when she got only salad and a piece of bread. Yes, bread was carbs, and carbs would surely kill her figure. But she was also starving and eating spaghetti was out of the question.

“So did you have fun with the kids today?” Mrs. Lawrence asked. It was strange how she was the only one who ventured out into conversation any time Sage was in this house.

Fun, Sage thought with sarcasm dripping from the word like honey. “Oh, yes. It was… what do they say? A blast.”

“Oh, good. I’m so glad. They do that every two weeks, you know.”

“Hm.” The bread nearly went down the wrong pipe. “Do… what?”

“Volunteer. Feed the disadvantaged. I think it’s a wonderful program.”

“Hm.” This was getting worse. “Wonderful.”

So this wasn’t a once-and-done proposition? They would have to do that again in two weeks? Well, one way or the other, she wouldn’t be there when they did it the next time. She was getting out. Bailing. Escaping. Digging a hole under Alcatraz and swimming for her life.

“Hey, Jaycee,” Rachel said, coming up to where they stood near the burning lean-to structure.

The boys all brought the wood to create the thing, and everybody was invited though no invitations were ever issued. It wasn’t a formal occasion, just something to do on a Saturday night in a town with no other hangouts available.

“Hey, Rach. Thanks for helping today. Talk about short-handed. That was a little ridiculous.”

“Tell me about it. It was a good thing you brought your cousin.” Rachel looked around. “Where is she anyway? I was wanting to say hello.”

Jaycee wanted to scream that she wasn’t her cousin and she wasn’t here either. Instead, she swallowed both of those and smiled stiffly. “She wasn’t feeling well, so she stayed home.”

“Oh.” Rachel, one of Jaycee’s classmates with a long dark hair and a pixy-style nose, nodded. “That’s too bad. She seemed kind of nice.”

It was all Jaycee could do to nod once. Nice was not a word she would have used to describe Sage Wentworth. Annoying. Counterfeit. Fake. Obnoxious. Unbearable. Yeah, those were much, much closer.

“Hey, I got you a DP,” Luke said, appearing at her elbow. He handed her the Dr. Pepper and snapped his own Coke open.

“Hi, Luke,” Rachel said, and if Jaycee didn’t miss her guess, Rachel was batting her eyelashes at the guy standing right next to Jaycee.

“Oh, hey, Rach,” he said in return before tipping up his Coke and taking a long drink, and Jaycee’s heart hurt for Rachel. Luke didn’t intentionally brush girls off. He just didn’t realize how little attention he ever gave them.

“Well.” Rachel let out a breath. “I’m going to go see what Brianna is up to.” And with that, she sauntered off.

“You know, you could be such a babe-magnet if you ever decided to try,” Jaycee said, ducking behind her drink.

Luke leveled a skeptical gaze at her. “What does that mean?”

“Rachel. She likes you.”

He looked at her with something between surprise and horror. “She does not.”

“Does too. I bet if you went over there right now, you could have a date for next Friday.”

Wanting to laugh her off, Luke scrunched his face as if that was the worst idea in the whole history of ideas. “Yeah, right.”

Jaycee turned her gaze on him. “I’m serious, Luke.” Then she shook her head. “You are just so oblivious in the girl department.”

“Yeah, well, at least I’m not mooning over Rory Harris.”

The knives in her eyes were back. “Leave Rory out of this. I just don’t know why you won’t give a nice girl a try. It wouldn’t kill you.”

Well, he could have said the same thing about her and boys, but he wisely chose not to.

Chapter 4

As Sage carefully painted her fingernails later that evening, she reviewed the day that had been basically a complete disaster from minute one. Of course there was the forced-volunteering which still grated on her nerves, and then, as if life could get no worse, it was the text she had received from her mother not thirty minutes before.

Aunt Anna cannot have you right now. You know that. She is dealing with the divorce and moving. Make the best of it, Sage. This is where you are this summer. Period. Deal with it.

It was amazing how incredibly hard it was to keep the tears at bay. Yes, she knew about Aunt Anna’s troubles, but Aunt Anna always had troubles. That had never prevented her from spending time with her before. Sage sniffed the hot, stinging back from her eyes as she concentrated on applying the soft pink polish. Why did her mother insist on being so unreasonable?

Probably because she didn’t grasp how completely unreasonable this place really was. Sniffing again, she carefully raised her wrist and swiped at her nose. A nice mani-pedi at LaToure Spa would feel so good right now. Alas, that was three months away if she made it that far, which at the moment was anything but a given. She hated being pathetic even alone, and pathetic was exactly how she felt.

However, she had learned that her feelings were the least of anyone’s concern. Feelings were to be squelched and hidden if they got in the way of life—her family’s, her friends’, hers. So what she needed to do was breathe them down, square her shoulders, lift her chin, and just get through this. She only wished three months didn’t seem so much like an eternity.

“So,” Luke said when they were back at Jaycee’s long after dark-thirty, “I guess I’ll see you at church tomorrow?”

“Yeah. Of course.” Jaycee shot him a brilliant smile. “Why wouldn’t you?”

Well, for one thing he wasn’t sure of anything anymore. He shrugged. “No reason. Just wondering.”

“Cool. Well, thanks for tonight. I needed that.” And then, quickly she crossed the console and kissed his cheek. “See you tomorrow.” With that she was gone, out, and striding up the walk.

“Yeah. Tomorrow.” Luke watched until she got in the house, and he put the car in drive for the short journey up the road to his own house.

They had warned her about the church thing the night before at supper, and Sage was determined to get her everything-is-absolutely-perfect act over the shattering pieces of her life. So she got up early, showered quickly, and went to get ready. Pulling out her nicest white Chanel dress suit and hanging it there, she began the arduous task of making herself beautiful. Foundation, two tones of blush, four complementing eye shadows. Eye liner. Mascara.

Undergarments.

Perfume.

Hose.

Heels.

The dress.

And then she started on her hair. A severe high bun would have to do because anything more sophisticated with actual curls and waves was just out of sanity’s reach this morning.

She was just applying the final touches to her soft pink lipstick when the knock sounded on her door.

“Sage, honey?” It was Mrs. Lawrence.

“Come in!” Sage called brightly, and when Mrs. Lawrence opened the door, surprise jumped to her face.

She was still in her bathrobe, her hair a mess of dark tangles. “Oh, my. Um, I was just wanting to make sure you were awake.”

With a smart, sassy smile, Sage flipped on the bright bulb of her awesome awesomeness. “Of course. I didn’t want to inconvenience anyone in the bathroom so I got up early. I know how things can get around here.” Somehow she took the edge off the end of that statement at the last possible second.

“Oh.” Mrs. Lawrence lifted her chin and then slipped a small smile on her face. “Great. Well, we’ll be leaving in about an hour. There’s breakfast if you want. Just cereal though.”

“Okay.” Sage fought to keep the brightness on her face. “I think I’ll just wait for later if you don’t mind. I don’t want to damage the masterpiece.” She fanned her fingernails up by her face and struck a pose.

Mrs. Lawrence battled to keep the smile on her face though it partially fell from her eyes. “Okay. That’s fine. I’ll just go and get ready then.”

“Fab-oo. I’ll be ready in 30.”

Clearly wondering what else there would be to get ready, Mrs. Lawrence nodded again and ducked back out.

The second the door closed, Sage let the bright-act fall from her. She should have been in Hollywood. She was way too good at this. Turning back to the mirror, she scowled into it. “Mirror, mirror on the wall, why can’t Mom see how much I hate this?”

The late night did nothing for Luke’s getting ready ability the next morning. Dragging himself out of bed, he grabbed a pair of jeans and a blue plaid shirt out of the closet before taking his gray sports coat from the back of the desk chair. Standard church attire. Down the hall he padded and into the bathroom. At the mirror, he scoffed at himself. No wonder he was single. That look would scare anyone away.

He thought about Jaycee’s comment about Rachel the night before as he climbed into the shower. She was wrong. For one thing, Rachel was nice, but she wasn’t someone he’d ever spent ten minutes with. For another, she wasn’t what he was looking for. Not that she was bad—for someone else, just not for him.

Turning under the water, he let it hit him square in the face, hoping that would drill the sleep out of him. No. Jaycee was wrong. About a lot of things actually. He turned again and reached for the shampoo. Him for one. Why couldn’t she see they would be good together? Why was friendship all she ever wanted from him? Why did she have to kiss him on the cheek and say, ‘See ya’ like it was easy to pick him up and drop him off wherever she wanted to?

Okay, he was being a little dramatic, and that wasn’t exactly attractive. Worse, he couldn’t let her ever see how dramatic he sometimes got about the situation because frankly, she would probably laugh him right out of the county if she knew. Rinsing off, he sighed. No. Jaycee Lawrence had no interest like that in him at all, and maybe that was for the best. If her taste in guys ran to Rory Harris, then he didn’t even want to be in the running for that prize.

He cut the water, reached for a towel and went to the mirror where he ran his forearm over it to clear it of the fog. “Face it, Baker,” he said to his own reflection, “she’s just not into you.”

And while that hurt, it was the truth, and it was time to face that truth and move on. Maybe Rachel was free Friday night…

At the small church, Sage followed the kids in, sandwiched between the parents. One look on the other side of that door and she knew she was going to need some fantastic acting skills for this one. The lobby was about as big as her bedroom back home, and the people in every corner of it, turned, looked at them, and then looked again.

Fear pummeled into her like a mega-ton wrecking ball. How many of them knew? About her? About the situation? About… them? Panic reached up and dragged the air right out of her lungs, and her head swam from the sudden lack of oxygen.

Maybe there wasn’t a hush, but she heard it cross the room just the same, right before she heard the whispers that suddenly accompanied the curious glances their direction. Lifting her chin was the hardest thing she had ever done, but she did it anyway. She was Sage Wentworth, and some poorly, dressed, small-town wanna-bes were not going to make her feel like dirt.

“Oh, Gregory, Emily,” an older woman who looked somewhere north of 70 said, greeting them with an outstretched, wrinkled hand. “We’re so glad you could join us this morning.”

Then her gaze slid to the children, and her face registered the extra. Sage wanted to disappear, but she breathed that back and fought not to shrink back.

“And who is this beautiful young woman?” the lady asked.

“Oh,” her dad said and cleared his throat. Sage wanted to look at him, but she didn’t. She couldn’t. If she did, the hesitation and awkwardness would surely yank the tears right out of her heart. “Mrs. Cameron, this is my…” He reached back for Sage and pulled her forward in front of him. If someone was going to take a bullet, it was going to be her not him. “…my daughter.”

“Your…?” The lady, Mrs. Cameron, tilted her head as if the information wasn’t registering correctly. “Oh. Well, I didn’t know you had another…” Then her words stopped, and she looked at Sage with eyes that clearly said very different words as she held out her hand. “Well, welcome, Miss…?”

“Wentworth,” Sage supplied as she took the lady’s hand. “Sage Wentworth.”

“Sage?” Mrs. Cameron seemed to stumble on the name. “Sage. Well, that’s a lovely name. A little untraditional perhaps, but that’s to be expected with the younger generation I suppose.”

How she kept smiling, Sage would never, ever know.

“Well,” Mrs. Lawrence said, breaking into the pleasantries as she herded the others to the interior door and away from Mrs. Cameron, “we’d better get inside.”

Nothing in Sage wanted to go up those brick stairs and through that next door. Nothing. But she pursed her lips together and fought to get the smile there as she allowed herself to be led to her doom.

Luke sat five rows from the back. He was supposed to be an usher today, to help out with the collection, and he was glad. It was tough to party all night and look church ready the next morning. He didn’t go to sleep through the sermon. He wouldn’t dare. His grandmother would skin him alive if he did anything so disrespectful. However, it was that and only that keeping him awake.

Pastor Steve’s sermon went on and on and on, and Luke willed himself not to look at his watch. Next to his parents, that would surely be noticed and noted and used against him the next time he wanted to go out the night before church. So he sat, insisting that his eyes stay open like there were toothpicks holding them up.

Finally the sermon was over, and time to pass the plate had come. He stood and smoothed down his plaid shirt under the sports coat as he headed for the back. The others, all older men, gathered and divvied up the baskets. Moving felt very, very good. He wondered if there was a church where you could stand, walk around, and exercise during the sermon. That might actually help him pay attention.

“Luke, you take that side,” Trent Guthery said, indicating the far side from where they stood.

Luke nodded and headed that direction as everyone sat and the music started. He waited for the other men to get into place, and then he walked down his appointed aisle, carefully keeping abreast of the other three spread throughout the church. At the front, he handed the basket to the first gentleman and turned for the choirs’ offering basket. Gathering it up, he turned back and handed that basket to the third row person. That pattern had been determined to take the least amount of time.

Standing, waiting for the first basket to get back to him, he glanced across the church—full of people, all singing in various pitches to the song the choir was currently leading. Then just as the second basket got to him, his gaze tripped over to and then gripped onto someone in all white. He wasn’t sure if it was the white or her that he noticed first, but he swallowed just the same. Barely remembering what he was supposed to be doing, Luke transferred the basket to the next person and stepped forward to wait for the other one.

Just more than halfway back she sat, back completely straight, looking like she was posing for a portrait that would hang in Buckingham Palace. Sanity and air escaped from his consciousness. And only when he pulled his gaze from her face, knowing he was both staring and that he shouldn’t be, did he realize who she was with and in the next second who she was.

As both of those tore through him, Luke put his gaze down, fighting to keep it there. On the carpet. Where it might be safe. Breathing was impossible. Thinking was worse. He took the basket, came to the row just in front of hers and handed it off. Like it was pulling him with it, his gaze came back up and fused to her. Why could he not just look somewhere else? Why was his whole being so magnetized to that sight?

It took him a full second to realize the other basket was being handed to him, and somehow, he got it to the correct next person without spilling the change everywhere, and then he was by her, and then beyond her bench, back to life that would never, ever be the same again.

The songs were old and the whole thing was a huge waste of time, except of course, for the judging part of it. Every time Sage stood, she felt the gazes of those around her, and she truly hated every one of them. Worst of all, she was a sitting duck once they got out. She couldn’t run to the van. She couldn’t ask to go with her friends. She couldn’t do anything other than absorb the knowing and unknowing looks darting her direction.

By the time the service was over, her nerves and will to be strong and not let it bother her were in tatters. If getting out was just an option. But it wasn’t, and it wouldn’t be. Part of her whispered that it would be like this every weekend from now until August, but another part of her told that part to shut up because she didn’t need to hear it right now.

When the final song ended, the others turned to follow her father out, and she did too, praying to the God Who she hoped was listening that He would set this place on fire so she could get out without anyone else asking any questions.

“Well, Gregory,” a woman about her father’s age said as he turned with her. They continued up the aisle in front of her, talking.

Behind her, Ryder broke for the door, and she shrugged out of his way. She didn’t dare look back at Jaycee and Mrs. Lawrence. By the scowl that had been on Jaycee’s face all morning, she knew better. Instead, she swallowed the lump in her throat, lifted her chin and followed the crowd to the door. It would really have helped if breathing didn’t make her feel so much like crying, or if she could have figured out a way to just quit breathing. But neither were happening. Step by arduous step, she followed the crowd and somehow got to the back.

“Bulletin?” the guy standing there in the plaid shirt, jeans and sports coat asked. Who wore something like that out in public?

Sage tipped her head slightly at him in question because she didn’t really trust the white paper he was holding out to her. “Bulletin?” she asked, knowing she sounded like a complete idiot the second she said it. Then she jumped out of that. “Oh, no. No.” The smile hurt, like it might split the carefully glued on mask in half. “I don’t need one. Thanks.”

Talking was a worse idea than breathing, and her head had started that swimming thing again.

However, the guy smiled at her as he let the paper drop. “You don’t remember me.”

That yanked her up short. “Remember?”

His smile dimmed as shyness overtook his features which were partially hidden under dark-sandy blond strands of hair that hung down over his forehead. “I’m Luke. From yesterday at the charity community meal thing?”

“Good morning, Luke,” an older man said, stepping past Sage and reaching for a bulletin which Luke gave him.

Luke nodded at the man. “Good morning, Mr. Larson.”

That forced Sage to take a step to the left rather than to the right and past him, and with the foot traffic continuing to her right, she was now trapped right in front of him.

With no other plausible option, she reached down and turned on the charm as she looked back up at him, smiling and blinking just so. “Oh, yes. Of course. Luke. Jaycee’s friend. You look… different.”

What did that mean? Great, Sage. That was brilliant.

“Oh, yeah, huh?” He lifted his elbows from his sides, looked down at himself, and handed the out next bulletin. “It’s kinda hard to pull off wearing spaghetti sauce to church.”

Sage glanced back at the person getting a bulletin even though she didn’t see them. “I hear that.” She looked down at herself. “Give me Chanel any day.”

He glanced past her again to hand the next bulletin out as he laughed. “Morning, Ms. P.”

“Well, good morning, Luke.” Ms. P, the cook from the day before gave Luke a hug first and then turned to Sage, clearly thinking she didn’t know her until she saw her. “My. My. My. Don’t you clean up all nice, Miss Sage.”

Not fully knowing how, Sage accepted the hug, hoping it wouldn’t wrinkle her suit. “Well, thank you.”

Ms. P backed up and settled her eyes on Luke after they took only one more trip down Sage. “Now, listen here, you need to stop by my house this week. We need to look at the menus for the summer. I’m thinking about changing a few things up.”

Sage realized the foot traffic was gone and she was in the way, so she smiled politely at Luke and said, “I’ll just be…” She pointed out the doors as if he wouldn’t understand otherwise, and carefully she stepped past them.

However, she only made it to the doors where she met up with Pastor Steve coming the other direction, and there on the top step, he stopped her. “Well, Sage!  It’s so nice to have you here this morning. I’m so glad you could come with your family.”

Oh, dear heavens. Please don’t do this here. But what could she do? Now, everyone standing in the lobby was looking up at her, wondering, whispering, and asking. “Well, I’m glad they invited me, Pastor.”

“Yes. Yes. So am I. So am I. Well, I hope you will join us again. You are surely a welcome addition to our humble services.”

“Thank you… for that… Sir.”

He turned to go back into the church, leaving her to face the crowd who was rapidly putting pieces together as their stares became longer and less shielded.

Taking the railing lest she do a digger onto the lobby floor, she lifted her chin and stepped purposefully down the brick-laid stairs. Down. Down. Down. Until she was level with all of them, but that didn’t help. She still felt their stares, their questions, their understanding.

Fighting to keep her feet from running, Sage let her gaze slide across the crowd, looking for a friendly face. However, her mind asked who she was kidding. There wasn’t a friendly face here. Not a single one.

Luke hurried with the clean-up portion of being an usher. He didn’t even really want to talk to her again necessarily, just see her again. That would be enough. “If that’s it,” he said to the head usher.

“Oh, sure. Go on. Thanks, Luke,” Trent said.

Hurrying, he headed out the double front interior doors and down the three brick steps, scanning the dwindling crowd. Then he spotted Jaycee standing, arms crossed in the dimmest corner on the far side. It was then that he saw Sage as well, across the lobby, talking with her father and one of his friends. Clearly that wasn’t an option, so he angled his steps over to Jaycee.

“Morning,” he said as if nothing at all was out of the ordinary.

Across the way, Sage laughed, and Jaycee’s scowl dropped another two octaves. “I know I shouldn’t say this here, but I really, really hate her.”

Luke put his hands on his waistline as he glanced over at Sage, trying to make it be just that. Wow, she was hot and gorgeous and dynamic and beautiful all rolled into one. If Jaycee was going to be jealous, there was plenty of material there to work with. He turned back to his friend. “Eh. She’s got nothing on you.”

Had he wanted to be reduced to cinders, that look would have done it.

“What?” he asked. “Come on, Jayc. She’s all image, all flash, no substance. You can tell that by looking at her.” He put his hands on Jaycee’s arms. “You, on the other hand, are deep and complex and intriguing.” And he pulled her into his embrace.

There she sniffed and pushed up her glasses. “Do you really think so?”

“I know so.”

The thoughts of Sage, however, didn’t leave Luke even after the Lawrence family did. He couldn’t get her out of his thoughts, and that bothered him. What kind of a friend goes crushing on that friend’s sister? Especially when said friend knows how said sister feels about said other sister? He was really glad they were going to his grandmother’s for lunch. A day of kicking back with the family and forgetting everything else was just what he needed.

“Honey, you need to eat,” Mrs. Lawrence said when they had gotten their food at the little restaurant that should have been closed down for all the health violations Sage could see without even trying. “You didn’t eat breakfast either.”

A hunger strike. That was a great idea. Sage shrugged. “I guess I’m just not very hungry after that wonderful meal we had last night.”

“Ugh,” Jaycee breathed next to her and bit into her bread in a very unladylike manner.

Sage glanced in her sister’s direction but chose to say nothing.

“If she’s not going to eat, can I have her fries?” Ryder asked.

Mrs. Lawrence grimaced. “Ryder, it’s not polite to take food off of other people’s plates.”

“Why not? We do it all the time.” He bit into his own fry and continued to eat as Mrs. Lawrence looked first at Sage and then at her husband, clearly begging for help.

He shifted in his chair, holding a fry above his plate. “You know, I’ve been thinking. We haven’t been out to the lake in a while. Why don’t we do that today? We could get the stuff, and go spend some time together, just the four… uh, five of us.” His glance around the table asked for all of them to rescue him.

“The lake!” Ryder said as if it was the Super Bowl. “Yes. Can we fish too?”

Her father glanced at her and then smiled. “Of course.”

“Did you know that girl is Gregory’s daughter?” Luke’s grandmother, Virginia Cameron, was saying to his mother when Luke walked into the kitchen. It already smelled heavenly.

“Well, of course,” his mother said. “Don’t you remember when she was here before? She had to have been like… what? Five or something?”

“Well.” His grandmother turned to accept the kiss he planted on her cheek as she stirred the potatoes. “It’s just a crying shame that he ever went to California in the first place. Leaving Emily like that. What did he think he was going to find out there? It’s California after all.”

Not wanting to interrupt or to be a part of this conversation, Luke went out to the living room where he found the rest of his family hunched over a game of dominoes. Hannah, his now-in-college sister sat on the couch, and he gratefully collapsed there with her. “Hey, there, Hannah-banana! I didn’t know you were coming.”

She beamed a smile at him as he gave her a hug. “Hey, they said fried chicken. Where else would I be?”

The headache wasn’t getting any better, and Sage really couldn’t tell if it was from the not-eating or the not breathing or just what. But by the time they got home, all she wanted was to curl up under the covers and sleep for three months.

“Thirty minutes,” her father said as they each got out of their respective doors of the van. “Ryder, we’ll need to get the stuff out of the garage.”

“Got it,” the boy said and bounded into the house to change.

Sage crawled out, feeling like the next step might kill her outright. She searched for an excuse, something to get her out of this, but she couldn’t find one. In the house, she went straight to her room, closed the door, and leaned back on it. How those tears could be so close to the surface, she had no accounting for. They hadn’t been there like that for a long time. With a sniff and a sigh, she took two steps and dropped onto the bed. Oh, how wonderful it would feel to just lay right here and shut the world out forever.

On the little table her cell phone beeped and just like that she was upright, grabbing for it. Sanity!  In two taps she had it on and the text pulled up.

Headed to Bloomy’s wish you were here.

Patelyn.

Oh, me too!!!!!!!!! She typed back. Infinity of exclamation marks would not have captured the desire.

Went to Cloe’s party last night. Everyone was asking about you.

The want to be there instead of here crashed over Sage in great waves. I bet it was fab.

Oh, and you’re never going to believe… Mac and Ben hooked up last night.

MacKenzie and BEN GRIFFIN?!!!

The one and only!

I bet Mac is on Cloud 9!

Haven’t gotten her to stop talking about it all day. That’s why we’re going, so she can tell me and we can shop for something for their date next Friday.

Sage could hardly stand it. One of her best friends was falling in love, and she was not there to witness it. Tell her she’d better text me with the deets. This is so obnoxiously UNFAIR of her to do this NOW!!!!

I know, right? I told her you’d be torqued, but you know, Mac. What the heart wants is what the heart gets.

“Not always,” Sage said to the empty room.

The knock jumped her out of the other world into this one. “Uh. Just a second!”

“Sage,” Jaycee said, and the ice in her voice was hard to miss. “You about ready?”

“Ready?” she breathed, finishing up the text and then looking down at herself. “Uh, n… yeah. Yes! I’ll be right there.”

“Well, hurry up. They’re about ready to go.”

“Oh. Uh. Okay.” She tossed the phone onto the desk and went to work on the dress suit, wondering what one was to wear to the lake in backwoods nowheresville.

“I heard you went with Jaycee to the bonfire last night,” Hannah said in that I-know-all-about-your-secrets voice she used when she wanted to needle him. They had survived dinner and were back on the couch as the dominoes game resumed.

“So?” Luke shrugged.

“Come on, little bro,” his sister said. “I’m gone. I’m not blind. I saw you after church talking to her today.”

That memory brought up another one of a beautiful young woman in white, but he squelched that thought the second it entered his mind. “What? Now I can’t talk to a girl without you sending invites to the wedding?”

“Oh, come on. I know you’ve got a thing for her,” Hannah said.

“Yeah, well,” he scratched his sideburn, “in order for that thing to work out, she would have to have a thing for me, which she doesn’t, so I think that’s pretty much a moot point.” He heaved a sigh and decided right then and there it was time to stop mooning over Jaycee Lawrence. “Besides, for your information, I’m thinking about asking Rachel out for Friday.”

That slammed Hannah to a backing-up stop. “Rachel Murphy? Why?”

Luke shrugged. “She’s nice, and according to Jaycee, I might have a chance with her.”

Hannah lifted her chin. “According to Jaycee. Oh, Luke, you’re making my heart hurt for you.”

“Ha. Ha. Thank you for your concern.” He ducked, regrouped, and brought his gaze back to hers. “So how are summer classes?”

The lake. It had sounded like a bad idea. It turned out to be much worse.

Sage carried a floppy chair across the rocky, uneven sand of the area near the water as every drunk redneck within a sixty-mile radius cavorted on the sparkling water beyond. They were everywhere. Families, up and down the expanse, and all the way around in every direction. Disparate smells wafted to them from the campfires, and Sage fought the urge to be sick. She did not need to know what they were cooking. The smell was enough to do her in.

The little kids racing around. The noise. The shouts from the water-skiers on the lake. Not a single thing she liked about this experience. Putting that chair down and fighting to get it righted, she worked to block it all out, not in any way sure she could make it through this.

“Nice of you to do your part,” Jaycee said, hauling the two chairs she was carrying and the one on her back over to where Sage stood. With that, Jaycee let the one chair slide to the ground and started snapping the others out.

“Here’s the cooler,” their father said as he brought the blue and white plastic thing over. “Once we get it all unloaded, Ryder and I are going to go across. If anyone wants to fish, you’re welcome to come.”

“No thank you,” Mrs. Lawrence said. “I plan on having a nice long siesta followed by a couple hours of a really good book.”

“Okay.” He leaned over and kissed her. “Suit yourself. Jayc? Sage? You guys want to come?”

“Come?” Jaycee asked with sarcasm dripping from the word. “Uh, no. Thanks, Dad. I think I’ll just stay here and work on my tan.”

“Sage?” His soft eyes found hers, pleading with her to love this whole idea.

It took her a second and a half to find her voice. “Me? Wh…? Uh. Oh. Fishing? Uh, no. Um, I think I’ll just… stay here… with Jaycee and work on my tan too.” Her eyes cut from his over to her sister’s who looked like she’d rather eat raw fish than to agree to that plan.

With a shake of her head, Jaycee stalked off to get her chair out without another word. Their father’s gaze slipped with her back to the vehicle before coming back to Sage’s. “Are you sure you don’t want to come?”

‘Sure’ about anything was asking a whole lot. “Uh, yeah. I’m sure.”

It wasn’t fifteen minutes of sunning when Sage realized that maybe she should have taken them up on the offer to go fishing—as absolutely horrid as that sounded. She was kicked back, enjoying the warm rays of the sun when suddenly the air around her fell into a shadow. Arching one eye open, she found a tall, nice-looking guy standing there. Both eyes came open, and she glanced over at Jaycee who was lying on the long lounge chair next to her, eyes closed.

“Um, can I help you?” Sage asked.

“With what?” Jaycee asked, and Sage wasn’t sure how to answer that.

However, he didn’t give her the chance to figure it out. “I’m sorry to bother you,” the guy said, and even Mrs. Lawrence came awake from the other side of Sage at that. “But my buddies and I are playing some volleyball. We were wondering if you’d like to come join us.”

That brought Sage full awake, and she sat up. “Volleyball?”

“Yeah, come on. It’ll be fun.” He put out his hand. “I’m Pete, by the way.”

“Well, Pete by the way,” she said as if that was his full name. A second and she shook his hand but barely. “I appreciate the offer, but I’m not really a sports-y kind of girl.”

“Oh, well, that’s okay. You could come watch.”

Her gaze slid over to the others watching them, and then she realized this was some kind of a dare or something. She smiled sweetly at Pete, feeling sorry for him. “Not now but thanks.”

“No?” he asked, clearly hoping he had misunderstood. “Not even for a little while?”

She looked back over at the guys. Four of them. One of her. “Not now, but thanks for asking.”

With that, he shrugged and jogged off, going right past Jaycee who watched him leave then turned to her sister, glared at her, shook her head, and put the other way, closing her eyes for emphasis.

What? Sage wanted to ask. Four guys and her? That wasn’t smart no matter who you were or how many people were on the beach. Anger nipped at her spirit as she put her head back again. How could every single thing she did be wrong?

“John, Felicia, we’ve got steaks if you all want to stay for supper,” Luke’s grandfather said as the clock hands headed into the five o’clock realm.

Part of Luke hoped they agreed; part of him wanted to go home and take a real nap. Lounging with Hannah-the-all-knowing was getting him nowhere because she was watching and surmising about last night and his whole life, which he really did not need right now.

His father looked over to his mother. “Probably not. I’ve got to go to Raleigh tomorrow.”

“Yeah,” his mother said. “I need to be getting home soon too. We’ve got the community garage sale next weekend. I’ve got to get the stuff packed up to take up there on Tuesday.”

Luke fought not to groan. A whole day of packing and then set up and clean up bookending two days of sitting there, praying someone would take their castoffs. Not his idea of a good time.

“Ooo,” Hannah said as she flipped through a magazine on the other side of the couch. “The community garage sale. Fun. Too bad I’m going to be knee-deep in biochemistry this week.”

“You’re knee-deep in something,” Luke said, “but it ain’t chemistry.”

“Speak for yourself.” She shot him a look. “Not my fault the rest of us flew the coop already.”

“Good news. We caught supper!”

Sage should really have been smart enough not to look up at them, but her eyes betrayed her before her brain could think it through. Not five feet from her stood her father with a whole line of very dead, very smelly fish.

“Ugh, Dad!” Jaycee was the first to react, almost falling off of her tanning chair. “That’s disgusting!”

“What?” He lowered them as if he was hurt.

“You should have seen the one I almost caught!” Ryder said, bursting forward. “It was this long!” He put his hands out.

“Oh, yeah?” Mrs. Lawrence said, clearly as disgusted as the two girls. “Where is it?”

“It got away at the last minute. But it was huge.”

“The one that got away,” Jaycee said, pulling up and shaking her head. “That’s a new one.”

Well, at least she was sarcastic with everyone, Sage thought sullenly. Maybe it wasn’t just her after all.

“We’re not really going to cook that, are we?” Mrs. Lawrence asked, the skepticism pouring from the words. She scrunched her nose. “I mean… here? Now?”

“I thought we could run up to the outpost store and grab some wood,” her father said, and suddenly Sage was cheering on her stepmom. “We could build a fire, do the fish, roast some marshmallows.”

“I’m not…” Mrs. Lawrence yawned and stretched. “Don’t you think we should be getting home? Tomorrow’s Monday.”

“Yeah, Dad,” Jaycee chimed in. “I’ve got to get the stuff ready for the garage sale, and it’s going to be late when we get home as it is.”

His face registered his displeasure, but he acquiesced to the whining. “Fine. I’ll just put these on ice and we can have them tomorrow night.”

Oh, joy. Something to look forward to.

Back home, Luke gathered up his laundry and headed downstairs. If he didn’t get it done now, it would surely be next week before he had another chance. At the washer, he dumped in everything but his whites and reds. No sense doing more loads than necessary.

“So what’re your plans tomorrow?” his mother asked, coming in to get something from under the little sink. He swiveled his shoulders around, surprised at her presence.

“Oh, you know, probably helping some damsel in distress drag stuff down from the spiders in the attic.”

His mother smiled as she brushed past him. “You know me so well.”

“Yeah, well.” He put in the detergent and softener and punched the buttons. “I haven’t lived here 18 years for nothing.”

The second Sage was back in her room, she grabbed her phone like a man dying of thirst at an oasis.

Help me!!!! She typed the words and sent the message to Patelyn. In seconds a message was back.

Still that bad, huh?

Today, we went to the lake.

That sounds like fun.

They went fishing!

For reals? Like real, actual live fish?

Well, they weren’t too live when they got back to us.

Ewww!

That’s what I said!!!

“Sage! Honey, can you come here and help us with supper? You really don’t have to hole up in your room all evening.”

She looked up, sighed and typed. Gotta go. Get me OUT OF HERE!!!

With one brush of her blonde hair from her shoulder, she went to the door where she found Mrs. Lawrence, arms folded, looking like a lecture was imminent. Thankfully, she did uncoil when Sage came out. “Sage, sweetheart, you don’t have to feel like you have to stay in your room all the time. Come out. Join us. Come on, help us with supper.” She leaned in. “I promise… no fish.”

The smile hurt as did holding back the grimace. “Yay.”

Chapter 5

“Did you get the two boxes in the back corner?” Luke’s mother asked the next day as she surveyed the haul Luke had manhandled down the old ladder from the top floor of their home.

“Think so. It’s these two.” He looked over the boxes that were in horrible shape, and he was very glad they had stayed together on the descending trip. “What is all this stuff anyway?”

“Oh, it’s from my grandmother’s place. When she passed away, Mom and Dad didn’t have a good place to store it. It’s been up there for years.” She opened one flap which sent dust flying in all directions.

Luke waved at the onslaught. “I would’ve never guessed.”

“Ha. Ha.” She reached inside and pulled out a piece of a broken dish. “Well, we might not make it to the garage sale with any of it after all.” Two more pieces of the green, white, and yellow dish came out.

“Nice,” he said, nodding though the assessment was clearly sarcastic.

However, her face fell in sadness as she sighed. “I remember this dish. It used to hang in her living room. Wow. That seems like so long ago.” Setting it aside, she reached in to get the next object. And old box came out. “And her jewelry. Oh, wow.” With the medium-sized sea-blue, padded box in hand, she sat down on the ottoman and opened it on her lap. Amazed nostalgia coursed through her eyes. “Oh, wow. Look at this.”

She lifted one set of pearls out. “I remember her wearing these.” Reaching in again, she pulled a set of earrings out. “Oh, and clip-on earrings. I can’t believe they ever wore these things.”

Luke stood in the center of the living room, hands on belt line, watching though he didn’t fully understand the awe. It all looked like junk to him.

His mother lifted an orange plastic-looking necklace out, and he really didn’t want to know what one would wear with something like that. It looked like costume jewelry gone really, really, badly wrong.

“Oh, my.” She kept digging as if forgetting his presence completely. “I’m going to have to call Mom to see what she wants to do with this stuff. She might want some of it.”

Raising his eyebrows, he surveyed her. “Why?”

However, the look on his mother’s face told him there was far more to this story than he was grasping.

“Someday,” she said, gazing up at him wistfully, “you’ll understand.”

He half-nodded. “Well, that day is not today. You want me to start taking the stuff in the utility out to the van?”

“Yeah, go on. I think I’ll just give Mama a quick call.”

The second half of the nod escaped his being. “Works for me.”

Sage was summoned for breakfast and then lunch. In fact, every time she managed to escape forced family time, she was ruthlessly drawn back into it. She sat at the table, watching but trying not to as Jaycee sat on one side crunching on potato chips and reading the paper and Ryder sat on the other eating Cheetos and tapping on his video game. At the head of the table sat Mrs. Lawrence, clearly wishing she could be anywhere but here.

“Um, I was thinking we need to get to the library,” Mrs. Lawrence said, coming to life over the driest sandwich Sage had ever tasted. “We need to sign up for the summer reading program.”

“Ah, Mom,” Ryder groaned, and Jaycee looked like she’d been shot with a flaming arrow.

“The library? Seriously?”

“Yes, seriously. I do not want your education to swirl down the drain just because there’s sunshine outside.”

Sage had learned to take very small bites and move as little as possible to draw no attention to herself. Carefully, slowly, she took a drink. No one could eat this and survive, of that she was sure. She had also learned that keeping her head down and just getting through things was the best bet in any situation involving North Carolina, and truth be told, she was getting pretty good at it. Not that life was any better from an actually getting better standpoint, but at least this way she could quietly disappear and no one seemed to notice the difference.

“I’m sure Sage would love to get out and see our fair little town.” Mrs. Lawrence dropped a bright smile her direction.

She smiled her winningest smile. “What? Oh, yes. Love it.”

The van was packed and loaded down with boxes from his sisters’ over-the-years collections. His mother was considering converting one of their rooms into a workout area, so that meant everything they hadn’t taken with them at Easter was fair game for the garage sale. However, if his mother decided things from the old boxes needed to go as well, she was going to have to make a separate trip.

“I’m headed to town,” Luke said, grabbing the keys from the little hook as he stepped back into the living room with one foot.

“Oh, okay. That’s great. Mom’s coming over. We’re just going to go through some of this before we decide,” his mother said, glancing up.

“Great by me. Nothing else will fit anyway.”

At the library, Sage conveniently went the other direction from the rest of them. Not that she was at all interested in modern architecture or space, but it was far safer than trekking around the fiction sections with Jaycee and Mrs. Lawrence.

Ambling once she got lost in the shelves, she came around the bookshelf really liking this escape plan when she met up with a solid, dark form coming the other direction. “Oh!” Just like that, she stopped, very nearly toppling backward. “I’m… sorry.”

“Oh! Hey!” Strong hands reached out and snagged her, righting her with no trouble. “Wow. No. Sorry. That was me. It was all…” At that moment the young man now holding her arms took a good long look at her and his smile spoke volumes of assessment that traveled all the way up to his gray-green eyes. “me.” Making sure she was on her feet and staying there, he reached up and swiped his fingers through the short-cropped dark hair. Football. Track. Soccer. Sports. Sage could see them written all over the tanned handsome face. “Oh. I’m sorry.” The smile was back on his lips and in his eyes. “Where are my manners?” He put out a hand. “I’m Rory. Rory Harris.”

“Well, hello, Rory Harris.” Sage pulled her best flirtatious pitch into her voice. “It’s very nice to meet you.”

He looked like he’d been hit by a Mars rock just before he shook out of the trance. “You… too.” Still holding her hand, he leaned in. “I’m sorry. Did I catch your name?”

Flirting came as easy as breathing. “Sage. Sage Wentworth.”

“Well, Sage Wentworth.” He let go of her hand and put his forearm on the shelf support next to them. “I haven’t seen you around, have I?”

She casually leaned her hip on the shelf well within his sphere of influence. “Maybe. Maybe not.”

His eyes drank her in. “No. No maybe to it. I would have remembered that, believe me.”

The giggle was soft, almost not there, and his delighted smile beamed down at her. His strong, handsome face was one a girl could definitely get used to.

“You’re not from around here,” he said, stating the obvious. “To what do we owe this pleasure?”

Okay, he was a kid from the sticks, but he was both charming and very smooth. She brushed her hair from her eyes and let her hand linger on her shoulder a second longer than it had to. “I’m visiting… family.”

His eyebrows bounced up. “Lucky family.” The smile was getting wider and speaking a lot of words his mouth wasn’t saying. “So does this family of yours have a name?”

Somehow she wondered if he would still be at all impressed when she uttered the word.

“Sage?” Jaycee came around the other corner, meeting up with their little tête-à-tête with a jerk. “What’re…?” Then she shrank back when she saw Sage’s conversation partner. “Oh, Rory.” She leaned back into the opposite bookshelf, trying to look smooth but missing by a country mile. “Hey.” However, she misjudged the shelf and hit the books instead. Mortified, she turned and started frantically righting the books as the moment shattered between Rory and Sage.

“Oh, Jaycee, here let me help you with that.” Rory sprang forward righting the books with her as Sage watched, knowing their nice moment was gone forever.

With the books back in order, Rory stood between them and crossed his large arms, nice arms, the kind that spoke of hours in the gym. He looked at Sage. “I guess this is the family.”

She smiled but said nothing.

However, he kept looking between the two of them. “Wow. You guys sure look a lot alike.”

Instantly, Jaycee dragged a fake, hard smile to her face and adjusted her glasses. “Um, I’m surprised to see you here. I didn’t know you hung out in libraries.”

He smiled that casual, smooth smile and leaned on the opposite bookshelf. Holy smokes that boy was gorgeous!  “Just grabbing the summer reading for Ms. Kline’s English class next year. Thought I’d get a jump on it.”

Somehow Jaycee’s smile became wider. “Awesome. I should look into the junior list. Is it posted online?”

Rory crossed his arms again, and Sage was wondering how well Jaycee knew him, where he lived, and how hard it would be to wangle a date out of him. He could definitely be an improvement on her summer. “It’s on her little blog-thingy. Just put it up this morning.”

“There you two are,” Mrs. Lawrence came up from the other direction, and both Sage and Jaycee turned. “Oh, hello, Rory.”

“Hello, Ms. Lawrence.” He stood and stuffed his hands in the front pockets of his jeans, looking incredibly innocent and a little boyish which stole Sage’s heart with one look. “I’m sorry. We were just…”

“Oh, don’t mind me.” She waved him off. “I was just ready to get going, that’s all.”

Rory nodded. “Oh, well, sure. Of course.”

Mrs. Lawrence looked at him once more and nodded with a smile. “Well, let’s go, girls. I have a couple more stops to make.”

And with that they left Rory Harris standing in the middle of an aisle lined with books looking like a young Superman without the cape.

Luke had never been thrilled about the weight lifting classes he’d been forced to take for JV football his freshman year, but today, they were sure paying off. The garage sale was an annual event to benefit the church, and people came from far and wide to get a can’t-pass-up bargain on mismatched dishes and children’s clothes from a family whose children were grown and gone.

So Luke wasn’t at all surprised to see the church hall brimming with worker-bee ants hauling, sorting, tagging and organizing the boxes other worker bee ants had brought in.

“Oh, Luke,” Trent’s wife, Macy, said about two seconds after his foot first crossed the threshold. “I’m so glad you’re here. Can you help us move this television that the Johnsons brought in?”

Macy, a young mother of about 30, had two little ones and another on the way. With one look her, Luke knew he’d better be the one to be moving the television.

“Sure. Lead the way.”

They had been to the library, the grocery store, and the bank—such that it wasn’t. Who let people who worked in a three-room building keep their money? It was inhuman. In fact, Sage thought, they probably didn’t even have online anything. They might as well be living in the Stone Age. She tried to keep the sighs of boredom and annoyance from slipping out, but a few had, and every time one did, Jaycee would peg her hard and fast with that glare she was becoming famous for.

“Only one more stop,” Mrs. Lawrence said from the front seat of the van. Happy. She always sounded so blasted happy, which made no sense whatsoever because in that van, happiness was the last thing anyone else was feeling. “I just need to run by the garage sale and see if they have space for a few of our things.”

From the passenger’s front seat even Sage heard the exhale, and Mrs. Lawrence looked over to her daughter. Then she glanced into the rearview mirror at Sage and fought to smile. “It won’t take long.” Her gaze went back over to her daughter. “I promise.”

The television, an antique thing from probably the 60’s, had been relocated to the opposite side of the center, and Luke was in the middle of helping John, Macy’s other kidnapped slave, move an armoire that had to weigh half a million pounds back over to where the television had been. Why they had to do so was beyond him, but he was helping, not asking questions.

“Oh, it’s Emily!” Macy suddenly said, trekking off to the main doors and leaving Luke and John staring at each other around the hulking piece of furniture.

Carefully they both lowered it to the ground and turned to watch her. The first thing that hit Luke’s brain was he wondered if Jaycee was with her mother. The second thing was trouble had shown up right behind them.

“Emily,” Macy said, coming up to them and giving Mrs. Lawrence a hug. “I was hoping you would come. We are so short-handed this year. You don’t mind, do you? You’re so good at pricing everything. I’m just… lost. Who puts me in charge of anything, right? I know, it’s a lot to ask, but, would you mind? I mean, just for today. Please?”

Mrs. Lawrence was clearly basking in the glow of the young woman’s adulation. She nearly said yes and then seemed to remember her three charges. “Oh, well…”

“Oh!” Macy exclaimed. “They can help. We’ve got plenty for everyone to do.” Turning doe eyes on Mrs. Lawrence, she practically pouted. “Please.”

“Oh, okay. Where do we start?”

From across the room, Luke watched them—Mrs. Lawrence and Macy going one way, Ryder and Jaycee halfway following them, and Sage glancing back at the door. The sympathetic laugh bubbled inside of him. He saw her desperation, and he wished he could go over there, say something cute or humorous to sweep her off her feet. Instead, he shook his head and went back to work.

Boxes of stuff. They were everywhere. Along with tables that weren’t set up and chairs sitting willy-nilly all over the place. If a bomb went off, it would have looked more organized. Sage dared not touch anything. It was all… old. In fact, as she carefully stepped behind them, following the others deeper and deeper into the maze of junk, her shoulders began to curl over her arms which were securely around her middle.

Turtles had never been her aspiration, but at the moment, being one sounded heavenly.

“Yes,” Macy was saying at one of the tables. “We need all of this marked, and where is the best place to put the kitchen stuff? We were thinking over in the corner where it wouldn’t have as big of a chance of anything getting broken.”

“That’s where we had it two years ago,” Mrs. Lawrence said, “but you don’t get much foot traffic over there.”

“Oh, good point.” Macy thought for a minute. “Maybe it would be better in this area over here, by the door.”

“If you have more expensive kitchen items, that’s probably a good idea.”

More expensive? Sage wondered what that would even mean in this dump. Something in one piece? Something not completely covered in grease? What?

“Oh, Jaycee, sweetheart,” a woman from behind Sage said, and Sage turned.

“Oh. Um. I’m… sorry. I thought you were…” The woman, a tallish lady with dark brown hair that was probably from a bottle said, pulling up short.

“Hi, Mrs. Murphy.” Jaycee came up to stand by Sage though one step back. She smiled as the lady looked back and forth between them.

“My!  They said you two favored each other.” Then she seemed to shake out of that. “I’m… sorry. Um, Jaycee.” She managed to take her gaze completely off of Sage and place it only on Jaycee. “Would you mind coming and helping me unload a few boxes? I only have a couple.”

A moment and Jaycee nodded. “Sure thing.”

As her sister walked off, Sage felt a sharp pang in her chest. What was she, chopped liver? She couldn’t help? However, she gave herself a good, hard, mental shake. What was she thinking? She didn’t want to help. She didn’t even want to be here!

When Luke and John got the desk thing in place, John went to find Macy to see what else she needed moved, but Luke knew that was a very bad idea. Without even trying to, he had followed the movement of the entire Lawrence clan, and he knew that Sage was way too close to Macy to risk being polite. So he turned and headed out to his own truck that had gotten next to nothing unloaded in the past hour.

In the bright sunlight of the parking lot, he opened the first door and dragged out two boxes. He had just made it back to the center door when he heard the call.

“Hold the door please.”

Of course, he couldn’t be rude, so he did as requested just a Jaycee came around the corner laden with boxes trailing Mrs. Murphy.

“Oh, Lucas. Thank you so much,” Mrs. Murphy said and thoughts of her daughter, Rachel, tinted his ears pink. “You are such a polite young man.”

He shook his head as Jaycee too crossed in front of him. “I do what I can.” Sliding himself and his own boxes into the room, he let the door go closed and followed Jaycee who was following Mrs. Murphy. “Fancy meetin’ you here.”

She barely acknowledged his entreaty. “Huh, yeah. Forced slavery.”

With a laugh and a smile, he lifted the boxes in his hands as well. “I hear you there.”

Thankfully, Mrs. Murphy led them through the tables to the center of the room where they carefully set the boxes on and under a table.

“Thank you, Jaycee,” the older woman said. “I sure didn’t want to have to make two trips.”

Jaycee set the boxes in her hands down as well and stepped back, putting her hands in her pockets. “Wouldn’t want that, would we?”

“Not if we could help it,” Mrs. Murphy said, and her laugh skidded right up to the line of annoying. “Well, good luck you two. I hope you get it all together.”

And with that and no more, she left Jaycee and Luke standing right where they had stopped. When she was out of earshot, Luke set his boxes down as well and leaned down to Jaycee’s shoulder.

“Sure, no problem. We’ll just get it all set up ourselves. No need to trouble yourself.” A moment and he looked down at Jaycee whose smirk was cracking through the sides of her mouth.

It made it all the way to a smile when she looked up at him. “I dare you to go say that to her.”

Luke shook his head and set his boxes down. “Uh, no. I like my skin, thank you very much.” Together, they turned and started out for the rest of his boxes. At least that’s where he was going, he wasn’t at all sure about Jaycee, but she was following and he wasn’t arguing. When they got to the door, he spun on her as he opened it. “And you wanted me to ask her daughter out. You do realize if Rachel and I hit it off, she would be my mother-in-law.”

Jaycee corkscrewed her face. “The man does have a point there. Yes. Yes, he does.”

At his vehicle, Luke gave her boxes as if they had discussed this whole thing. Strange how easy and natural everything was with her.

Sage hung out as close to the wall as she could get without going right over the table and through the sheetrock. Ryder had asked to go with some other young boys, so he too had abandoned her. She watched, trying not to, as Jaycee and the guy from church made several trips across the center. They were laughing most of the time, and she wondered what they were talking about. Probably nothing important, but at least it was something. Absurd loneliness began a slow coil around her chest. Why did she feel like crying so often here?

Tired of standing, she found a lone chair at the end of one of the tables and sat down. Her mind drifted back to the library and Rory. She wondered what he was like. He was definitely easy on the eyes. Maybe she should ask Jaycee about him. Then again, that probably wasn’t the smartest idea in the whole history of ideas.

Still, she thought as she looked up at the blank beige-yellow wall, what else was there to do in this dumpy little town? And Rory wasn’t that bad, in a backwoods, North Carolina kind of way. Sure, he wasn’t the guys from her high school. Then again, nobody was them. Money, cars, trust funds. No. Nobody was them.

She thought about McKenzie and Ben. Lucky girl that McKenzie. Not that it would last. They never did. High school flings weren’t supposed to last. In fact, the drama would surely start any day now if it hadn’t already. That’s just the way things were in her world. Temporary. Very, very temporary.

Laughter from the other side jerked her attention that way, and a sinking feeling dropped into her stomach as she watched them. While everyone else on the planet went on with life as if it made sense, here she was in po-dunk nowheresville praying she could stay sane enough to get out of this alive. Life wasn’t fair. At least not hers anyway. For absolutely everyone else, it seemed just peachy.

The effort to keep Jaycee happy while simultaneously worrying about the teen beauty queen over by the wall was about to split Luke in half. Of course, he didn’t know Sage, and he couldn’t and wouldn’t imagine just going up to her to talk. But he kept an eye on her just the same. She looked like an exquisite statue, sitting there primly on the chair, certainly not like a teenage girl his age. She was a goddess, a starlet—fascinating and completely and utterly out of his league.

However, he also couldn’t shake how very abandoned she looked, sitting there all by herself as all of life went on around her.

“Don’t you think?” Jaycee asked next to him as she busily refolded the clothes from Mrs. Murphy’s boxes.

“This is me you’re asking,” Luke said, falling so easily into their normal roles. “Do I ever think?”

Jaycee’s smile, the full mega-watt one, beamed up at him. “Well, that’s true.” She folded another pink child’s jumper. “I don’t know. I mean, getting some college courses out of the way now sounds like such a good idea, but I don’t want to fall into the Christina trap either. I watched her last year. Four dual credits and one with Ms. Kline would be enough to kill anybody.”

Without him so much as willing it to, his gaze floated down to her, and he shook his head. Then he went back to unloading the boxes. “Thankfully, I don’t have to worry about that problem. I did good to get through Algebra II last year. I’m not taking dual credit anything.”

Her gaze slipped over to him. “You are such a slacker. You could totally do it if you put that head of yours into it.” Leaning over, she bumped his shoulder with hers very nearly sending him toppling the other direction.

“Now why would I want to do that? I’m trying to make sure us slackers are well-represented.”

“Well, you’re doing a good job of it,” Jaycee said, swaying into him again, and the glint in her eyes swept his heart away from him.

Sage shook her head, pursed her lips and tried with everything in her not to watch them. She couldn’t believe how thoroughly her radar had been off before. They were so clearly a couple—Jayce and church guy. What was his name again? Luke.

Yeah, Luke. Watching them without even trying to or meaning to, Sage cataloged everything that screamed their coupledom. First, it was how very closely they stood together, working, yes, but practically in the same space. And then there was the look. They both had it in every glance. That look, the one she had hungered for her whole life, spoke more volumes than had ever been written. It said, “I care about you. I see you. I’m enjoying being here with you. I want to spend every minute with you.”

True, she’d come close to getting the look with a couple guys, but their versions always turned into “how fast can I take this without completely freaking you out, so I can get what I want and get out.” She sighed. Too bad more than one had found out she wasn’t into them getting what they wanted. When they found that out, well, it was never long before she got the text or the call… or they just showed up to school with some random cheerleader on their arm. Oh, yes, she, the great Sage Wentworth, had been completely and utterly ignored on Monday morning when a Saturday night hadn’t panned out the way said Look Boy thought it should have.

“Oh, hey.” The words from behind her nearly sent her crashing right off the chair as she spun to find none other than Rory Harris coming up, holding two boxes in his gorgeous, strong hands. “I thought that was you.”

“Oh.” Sage brushed the six strands of hair from her forehead, falling expertly into the coquettish debutante role life had assigned her. “Hey.”

Luke nearly dropped the Crockpot he was holding for Jaycee when he glanced over to where Sage had been sitting alone. His heart did a war dance through his chest. What’s he doing here, and why is he talking to Sage? Heat and not the harmless kind surged through him. He jerked his gaze away from them, hoping Jaycee hadn’t seen. Too late.

She followed his gaze, and in the next second, her face fell and her hands went into hyper-action mode. “I think we should put that over here,” she said, stepping away from him toward the front doors, all laughter gone.

Rory had clearly come in from the back doors through the kitchen, and now he was towering over Sage, his foot up on the chair in front of her. They were talking. Sage was talking to Rory Harris. It was amazing how many ways Luke’s brain could find to state and restate that horrific thought.

“Yeah,” Jaycee said, sounding very much like someone was strangling her to death, “I think Mom said over here by the door. Probably by this kitchen stuff.” At the far table, she started moving and sorting things Luke wasn’t even sure she could see.

“We could set it on the floor, under the table so it doesn’t get broken.”

“No. Here. Here’s a spot. It’ll be good right here.” Jaycee slapped the table just a little harder than she had clearly meant to. That sent her hand back up to her other as she fought to not let him see how out-of-control she had gotten in the last three minutes.

“Here?” he asked as if he was too clueless to make a move without her express approval.

“Uh, yep.” She nodded more times than was necessary as she backed away from him and put her hands near her back pockets. “I think that ought to work. Looks good. Great. Yep. I think that’ll get it.”

With that, she turned and headed back to where they had been. Luke watched her carefully, feeling the earthquake building beneath his feet. At the table where the aisle started, Jaycee missed the turn badly and rammed her thigh into the table’s corner.

“Ugh.” She shook her head, making her ponytail swing. “Stupid. Idiotic…”

With one glance over into the corner, Luke wished with everything in him that he could remove Rory Harris from the map and never have to deal with him again.

Sage giggled. She was good at giggling, and she hadn’t giggled in what felt like forever. “Aw. I’m sure you say that to all the girls.”

Rory leaned down so his elbows were on the back of the chair he was already leaning against. “Nah. Just the really pretty ones.” His dark eyes burrowed into her and right through her to the soft-shelled core around her heart.

She didn’t have to pretend to blush. It was for real.

“I can’t believe I was lucky enough to run into you twice today,” he said. “What’re the odds?”

Lifting her eyebrows, Sage decided to play his game, and she knew very well she was better at it than anyone else he had ever met. “Well, I’m a lot less concerned about the odds of meeting up twice in one day and more concerned about what the odds might be of seeing you again sometime.”

He looked very pleased by the statement. In fact, he graced her with front-row view of a perfect row of sparkling teeth for her effort. “Pretty and she knows what she wants. I’m liking this one more and more.” One nod as if he was thinking about it, Rory perused her as if deciding. “How’s this weekend? One of my friends is having a bonfire on Friday night.” He shrugged. “It’s not wine and cheese with the upper-crust but it’s something to do.”

Considering her other options, it sounded wonderful. However, Sage didn’t want to sound too eager. She leaned back, perusing him herself. “So, you know, just out of curiosity. Not that I’m saying yes or anything.” She took a strand of hair and wound it around and around her finger, making sure he could see her perfect fingernails in the process. “What would a girl wear to something like that? Hypothetically I mean. I’d hate to be too overdressed.”

With no effort at all, his gaze slid down her figure before latching back onto her gaze. “I’m sure whatever you wear I won’t be able to take my eyes off of you.” His smile was back, wider now, more inviting, more charming.

“Oh, well, then I’ll have to look especially good…”

“Rory!” someone called from the kitchen and that jolted his gaze up to it.

He jerked his head up in affirmation that he had heard to whoever was standing in the kitchen behind her. “Be right there.” Then his gaze was back, drilling into her, pinning hers to his. “I’ve gotta go. So, like eight on Friday?”

She shrugged as if her heart wasn’t jumping out of her skin. “Sounds great.”

“What did I ever do to deserve this?” Jaycee asked, and her anger was hotter than the sun outside. “This is unbelievable. Completely and totally unreal.” She slammed another box onto the table and started yanking stuff out of it. “I’ve been here my whole, entire life. She’s been here for like two minutes.”

Luke didn’t know what to say to calm her down. Worse, he wasn’t having any better luck calming himself down.

“You know how Rory is with girls,” Luke said dismissively, but that statement didn’t help either of them.

“Great. Now I get to watch Ms. Perfectly Perfect Perfection herself steal the guy I’m in love with away from me. This is just great.”

It wasn’t at all clear how many swords she could stick into him before he bled to death, but at that moment it felt like she was trying to find out.

Chapter 6

Sage wasn’t sure how Jaycee could be even more hateful to her than she had been before, but clearly she had vastly underestimated her stepsister.

“It was nice of you to help Luke today,” Mrs. Lawrence said to her daughter as they drove home.

“Well, at least I didn’t just sit around and take up space like some people.” Jaycee jerked her gaze into the back, catching Sage before she could get her shields up.

“Now, Jayc.” Mrs. Lawrence glanced in the rear view mirror, apologies and concern coursing through her eyes. “I’m sure Sage would’ve helped if we had given her something to do.” Her gaze went over to her daughter’s. “It’s not like you did anything to include her.”

In one snap Jaycee uncurled. “Oh, so this is my fault now?”

It was clear how much effort Mrs. Lawrence was expending to keep a lid on the situation. “I’m not saying it’s anyone’s fault. I’m just saying it would be nice if…”

“It would be nice if she did everyone a favor and went back where she came from. That’s what would be nice, Mom.”

Knowing no other thing to do, Sage put her gaze into her lap where her fingers were playing with each other. If she just did that, maybe the barbs wouldn’t hit her with so much force. Not that it was currently helping, but it was worth a try.

“Well, that was mean,” Ryder said from the seat next to Sage. “You should take that back. Mom, you should make her take that back.”

“I…” Mrs. Lawrence’s gaze swept around to each of them as helplessness went through her gaze.

“It’s okay.” Sage got her voice to work though it came out as more of a squeak, and she smiled a tight smile at Ryder. “Jaycee is entitled to her opinion.”

Thankfully they pulled into the yard and up to the house before Jaycee had any more chance to offer her opinion. The sight of that house made the tears in Sage’s heart jump to the surface. Trapped. She felt so utterly and uncontrollably trapped by all of it. She couldn’t go back to California and she didn’t want to stay here. Her chest began to tighten, and she wondered how she would ever keep from losing it right there in front of them.

Obviously Jaycee didn’t want to be there either because the second the vehicle stopped, she jumped out and ran for the back door.

“Well, that was rude,” Ryder said.

The other three van occupants climbed out slowly. Ryder went in ahead of them.

“I’m really sorry about that,” Mrs. Lawrence said. “She just gets like this sometimes.”

Sage nodded, understanding perfectly. “Yeah, like any time I’m around.”

“I’ll talk to her.”

That would do no good whatsoever, and they both knew it. No. This was an impossible situation. The problem was, Jaycee wasn’t willing to just make the best of it like the rest of them.

Luke wondered how many fireworks had burned holes in their van on the way home. He was quite sure some had. As he drove past their house on the way home, he glanced into their driveway. Yes, the van was there. That presumably meant they were too.

He considered stopping, thought better of that, and twisted his gaze away. He couldn’t help anyway. “God,” he whispered as much with his heart as his lips, “this one is going to take a miracle.”

Miracles and words were in short supply the entire evening at the Lawrence household. Sage did her level best to stay out of Jaycee’s way and clear of the firing range. At one point she considered broaching the subject of her date with Rory, but she didn’t know the best way to do that and the opportunity never showed up. So after a very short appearance for supper, she went to her room with the excuse that she had some reading for school to get done.

That wasn’t at all true, so once behind the locked door, she pulled out her phone and started burning up the wireless between her and California.

By Friday very little had changed with the exception of Sage’s brilliance with the school reading thing. She now used that excuse every chance she got. Maybe they would think she was a slow reader. Maybe that she was in the honors program. Whatever it took, it was working and she was glad of it.

However, realizing that she couldn’t just climb out of her window that evening though she had contemplated it, she took a reconnaissance mission through the house at around three o’clock. She was pretty sure Jaycee had gone to the garage sale to hang out with Luke and “help” so that left a hopefully clear shot at Mrs. Lawrence. Sure enough she found her stepmother clipping coupons on the coffee table in the living room.

“Oh. Hi.” Sage instantly felt the awkwardness at having no clue how to do this.

Mrs. Lawrence spun in surprise. “Oh. Hi, Sage.” The scissors clattered to the coffee table. “Did you need something?”

“What? Oh. No.” Her hand came up to her elbow which never bent. “Well, not exactly. I just… um, I have… something… to ask you.”

“Oh. Well.” Mrs. Lawrence abandoned the coupons and slipped up to the couch where she patted the cushion beside her. “What’s up?”

How Sage wished she could have sent a text like she normally did with her own mother. It took a hard breath to get herself moving. She sat down, not next to Mrs. Lawrence but at the far edge of the couch. A smile and another breath, but still nothing came out. Why was this so hard? It wasn’t like they would say no. Would they?

“You said you had something you wanted to talk about?” Mrs. Lawrence leaned down as if to get a better view of her stepdaughter.

Sage let her head nod for her. Once. One trip down and then it and she stopped.

“What is it?” Somehow the older woman almost sounded amused.

“It’s just that… well. I got asked out.”

“Out?”

“Yeah, like… on a date.”

“A date?” Why did it sound like she had never heard these words before?

“For tonight.” Sage uncurled. “I know. I should have said something before now, but I didn’t know how.”

Mrs. Lawrence took a breath and shifted backward as if absorbing the information. “May I ask who this date is to be with?”

“With? Oh. Uh, Rory. I think his name’s Harris?”

Finally, Mrs. Lawrence looked as if she was relieved. “Oh, the Harris boy? Oh. Well… I don’t…” Then she thought better of whatever she was going to say. “I’ll tell you what. I’m just going to call Gregory about this. Run it by him, you know. I’m sure he’ll say yes.”

Then why did it sound so much like he might say no?

The pattern of bargain hunters had been steady all afternoon. For lunch Jaycee had brought Luke a ham sandwich and a Coke from the kitchen where the volunteers were. He was grateful because but for that small amount of sustenance he would surely have passed out long before now. He and John had hauled nearly half the stuff they had hauled in back out again, lifting things into pickup trucks and tying them to car trunks.

He’d even prayed more than a couple times that the ropes would stay tied all the way until the furniture made it home—wherever home was.

Early on he had considered asking about Sage, but once that thought had mercifully left from his heart, they had enjoyed a nice day together. It was so strange how things were just not hard with Jaycee around—at least when she wasn’t on the warpath about something. They were such a team, stepping in to help without being asked, listening without even listening. It was crazy, but by four o’clock, he had decided to just enjoy it rather than fighting it.

“So,” he said in the course of a short lull in the action, “you going out to the bonfire tonight?”

Jaycee shrugged as she rearranged some clothing. “I was thinking about it. Better than sitting at home all night.”

Luke nodded, feeling the question in his heart but not being able to quite get it out.

“You?” she asked, looking up at him, and that look really wasn’t fair to a guy who was trying so very hard not to fall for her.

He shrugged. “I was thinking about it. I just can’t stay as late as I did last week though. I almost fell asleep in church the next morning.”

Jaycee laughed. Wow did he like that laugh. “I hear you there. We had to go to a family outing at the lake all day Sunday. If it wasn’t for the lounge chair and sunscreen, I’d never have recovered.”

A slow blink as he considered and reconsidered the question. “So if you’re going and I’m going, what do you say…?”

Her smile was slow but it came just the same. “Sure.”

Mrs. Lawrence returned to the living room after what felt like a century. She sat down on the couch and paused a moment before her gaze came over to her stepdaughter. “I talked with Gregory, and we agreed that it’s okay if you go out tonight.”

Sage nearly collapsed into the couch cushions for relief, but somehow she kept upright. “Yay!”

“But.” Her stepmother lowered her head so that her eyes could convey the seriousness of whatever came next. “Your curfew is midnight. On the dot. No exceptions.”

“On the dot. No exceptions. Got it.”

“And that’s in the house, not in the driveway.”

“In the house. Twelve midnight. Got it.”

There was a slight hesitation.

“And Sage, something else.”

The something else crinkled Sage’s face for one second but she nodded anyway.

“Your father and I… well, we’re… we’re concerned about you.”

“Me?” Sage wasn’t following.

“The boys… around here. They aren’t the flashy, sleep around type of guys. They’re just all-American, country kids. We don’t want you to get the wrong idea…”

“The wrong…” The barrage of arrows had come so suddenly Sage didn’t know where to duck to get away from them. Could her stepmother be saying what she thought she was? “Oh. Of… of course. Of course.” Sage was nodding now, more to keep the tears of hurt from falling than for any other reason. “Yes. Yes. I understand. I’m not…”

“Oh, good.” Once again Mrs. Lawrence looked relieved. “I just wanted you to know. I mean, your father is very well-respected in this community, and…”

Oh to be able to withstand a nuclear blast like that one and come out smiling. “Yes. Yes of course. I would never do anything to…”

“Mom! I’m home!” Ryder came in the back door with a bang.

Mrs. Lawrence smiled and reached over to put her hand on Sage’s. “Good. I’m glad we cleared that up.”

Back home Luke dragged three shirts out of his closet. They were all basically the same idea—plaid with no holes in the elbows. He was sad and pathetic. Maybe he should get a new wardrobe like Rory. Maybe then Jaycee would notice him.

Hating himself for that thought, he threw the shirts to the bed and grabbed up the first one. It wasn’t like he had anything better. As he buttoned the shirt, he caught sight of himself in the mirror. It took next to nothing for the assessment, and he shook his head.

Even to think it was pointless, so he tucked his shirt in and thought as little as possible.

“Be back later!” Jaycee called for the whole house to hear around seven-thirty.

Sage was still in her room where she had been all evening—specifically to avoid contact with any other person the Lawrence household. With Jaycee gone, there was more freedom but only a bare modicum of it. She checked her reflection once more. White jeans that still fit even in the face of all the carbs she had consumed. A top from Antropoly. It was a tunic number, short in the front, longer in the back. Burgundy. One of her colors.

Those less-in-the-know would have said it looked like a loose-fitting tank top, but she would so never wear a tank top. Not even if someone tried to make her wear it when she was dead. With her nails painted, she didn’t look half bad. Even the country bumpkins around would have to concede that point.

Her spirit slammed hard into the thought of the country bumpkins and how moral and upright they were compared with her and her crowd. Mrs. Lawrence would probably flip if she knew half the things some of the kids at Sage’s school had done. But Sage wasn’t like them. She wasn’t like that. Sure, church wasn’t her favorite place in the world, but she didn’t go around whoring herself like her stepmother clearly thought she did.

The doorbell rang at five ‘til eight, and Sage’s heart finally felt a small bounce of hope. She would, of course, keep him waiting a few minutes. After all, anything important was worth waiting for.

“Sage, honey,” Mrs. Lawrence said at her door. “Your date is here.”

“Be right there!” Sage applied a touch of pink-with-a-hint-of-wine lipstick. Put the two sides of the container back together and gave herself a once-over in the mirror. “Perfection.”

“I guess you’re going to be there tomorrow?” Luke asked as they drove into town. Getting to the bonfire before sundown would label them both geeks and losers, so the unspoken plan was to eat for a little bit before heading over there.

“Of course. It’s better than being at home.” A moment and Jaycee shivered.

Luke let his gaze slide over to her. “Is she really that bad?”

One glare and Jaycee returned her gaze to the trees outside. “Yes. Now can we please talk about something else?”

“Well, my, my, my,” Rory said when Sage stepped into the living room. “Don’t you look… amazing?”

“Amazing?” Sage tilted her head. “I’ll take it.”

“Oh. These are for you.” He held a small bouquet of flowers out to her, and she took them.

“Such a gentleman too.” She wanted to say something more pointed in the general direction of her stepmother, but she didn’t dare. “Mom,” she said, barely turning, “would you mind putting these in some water for me?”

“Oh, of course. No problem.” Mrs. Lawrence took the flowers but never left.

“Well,” he said. “We should go.” He offered Sage his arm, which she took.

“Have her home by midnight,” Mrs. Lawrence called as they headed down the front walk. “And not a second later!”

He waved in acknowledgement but they never stopped walking.

“So, it looked like your mom got rid of some stuff,” Jaycee said after they had ordered.

“Ugh. The attic has never been cleaner.”

She laughed, and Luke smiled. He sure did like that laugh. “Listen, I know things have been kind of weird this summer with me and this whole thing… at home and everything.”

He slung an arm over the back of the booth. “No weirder than usual.”

Her smirk said she both understood the joke and appreciated it. “It’s just that…”

“She’s from California and you’re not.” Luke let his arm fall to the table as he sat forward. “I get it. I really do. But you’ve got to know that being you is not such a bad thing. I mean, you’re pretty and you’re one of the smartest people I know.”

Jaycee smiled and her gaze fell to the table.

“Except when Sage shows up, and then you completely lose your ever-lovin’ mind.”

The smile turned into a grimace and melted into a sad smile. “Yeah, I’m sorry about that.” She shook her head and sorrow seemed to shadow every inch she moved. “It’s just that things, at home… I mean, everyone is all walking on eggshells all the time. I don’t think Mom has stopped cleaning, and Ryder…” She rolled her eyes. “Don’t even get me started on him.”

Funny for all the names, there was one that he hadn’t heard. “What about your dad?”

The waitress came and set their drinks on the table. Luke said thanks almost without saying anything.

“Where’s he in all of this?”

Jaycee sat, falling into uncharacteristic-for-her silence. “He hasn’t been around much. Summer’s always kind of busy for him, but…”

He waited, listening, trying to hear what she wasn’t telling him. “But…?”

A moment and she shrugged. “It’s like he leaves before we get up, and he gets home after we’ve all gone to bed. It’s not like… well, like last summer, we went to the beach or the lake every weekend we weren’t doing other things. Going to the amusement park or to Raleigh to the water park. It’s like this year, he doesn’t want to be anywhere around us.”

Luke nodded, not really understanding exactly but more to keep her talking.

“I don’t know. I know what it was like when she wasn’t here, and how it is now that she is here. I guess I just don’t understand why she had to come. Why she had to mess everything up.”

The bells on the establishment rang, and Jaycee looked up. A second and horror slid across her face. “Oh, you have got to be kidding me. Can’t she give it a rest for like half-a-minute?”

Almost knowing what he would find when he did so, Luke turned to see Sage walking in on the arm of none other than Rory Harris. Luke closed his eyes knowing whatever was coming would not be good.

“Oh, look,” Rory said about five seconds after they had entered. “It’s Jaycee.”

Sheer panic gripped Sage in one swipe. With nearly no effort at all, she flipped the switch to sweetness-and-honey, clinging to his arm to drag his attention to her. “You know, Rory,” she said in her best petulant voice. “I’m really not that into greasy, fried food tonight. Do you mind if we go somewhere else?”

“Somewhere…?” He looked confused and worried.

“I know. It’s the California in me. I just don’t do grease very well. Please?”

“Two?” the waitress asked, coming up and grabbing menus.

Rory looked at the waitress and then down at Sage. “I’m sorry. I think we’ve changed our minds but thanks anyway.”

The dinging of the bell announced something, but with his back to the door, Luke had no idea what.

Jaycee let out a breath. “Oh, good. They left.”

He could hardly believe their luck, and he spun in the booth to check it out himself. Relief poured through him as well, although half his heart had gone out that door, wanting to protect Sage but knowing that wasn’t his place or his fight. “Well, that’s good.”

Their waitress brought their food.

“I was afraid I might have to referee, and I didn’t even think to wear stripes.”

Sage knew even as they ate at the slightly-less-greasy-spoon diner in town that avoiding Jaycee and Luke all evening was probably not going to happen. “So,” she said, making sure there was enough honey in her voice. “You said bonfire.”

“That I did.” Rory took a drink of his shake.

She nodded one nod and forced a smile onto her face. “Here. Right? In town?”

“Oh.” Crazy how confused he could look when she didn’t ask things outright. “Not.... in town, in town. It’s out by Chester’s. Couple miles out of town.” He sat forward. “They usually just stack the wood in the middle of the road. Oh. It’s a dirt road. Nobody goes down it or anything. That way everybody can come out and just hang for a while.”

This nod was slower. “And by everybody, you mean…?”

He shrugged again. “Everybody. There’s not much else to do. Closest thing to fun is 50 miles that way.” He pointed, which wasn’t necessary.

“And that is?”

“Oh, they have a bowling alley and some arcade things. There’s a rock climbing wall if you’re into that.” Amazing how he could sound so hopeful.

Sage scrunched her nose. “Rock climbing? Not really into rock climbing.”

“Yeah.” He took another drink. “It would be pretty hard to do with those nails.”

With a laugh, she fanned them out so he could see them. “Guilty as charged.” She sat back. “So bonfires and garage sales. It must be so exciting to live here.”

He shook his head. “I’m bailing on it next year. Got a couple of schools looking at me for college.”

“Oh?”

“The football thing.” And it was clear humility was not one of his stronger qualities. “Not sure which one I’m going to choose yet. We’ll see.”

“Fascinating.”

When the sun had officially gone down, Luke made the first move to vacate the booth. “Guess we should be going.”

“Guess so.” Jaycee followed him up but wound her arms around her stomach so he had no hope of holding her hand or making any kind of move that might indicate they were on a date. Which they weren’t. They never were. He considered asking her about that, but the peace around them was so very, very fragile he didn’t dare.

Out in his car, he did get up the courage to say, “So Chester’s?”

She hesitated only a split second. “Of course. Right?”

He nodded. “Right.”

When they said bonfire, they weren’t kidding. Wishing she had sat on the passenger’s side of Rory’s hulking pickup truck so she would have something to hold onto, Sage had to opt to hold onto him when he turned to park in the ditch along with about 20 other random vehicles. Of course, holding onto him wasn’t such a bad thing, and it was even better when he held onto her.

“Whoa there,” he said, steadying her. “Careful.”

“Oh, well.” She brushed the hair from her eyes. “I wasn’t expecting to go joy riding tonight.”

His eyes narrowed as he smiled at her mysteriously. “Maybe later.” Then he smiled and a dimple dented the edge of his mouth as he winked at her. “Come on. Right now. I want to show you off.” And he grabbed her hand and out they went.

Luke looked for them even as he accompanied Jaycee from his car into the crowd. The party was already in full swing with someone’s music blaring nice and loud.

“Hey, Jayc!  Hey, Luke!” John Wade, Luke’s garage sale moving buddy, called as he lifted his drink in the air at them. “Nice y’all could come.”

“We wouldn’t miss it!” Luke called back, sticking his hands in the front pockets of his jeans as he followed Jaycee. She didn’t stop so neither did he.

Very near the fire, they both finally pulled up short.

“Ah, Jaycee!” Franchesca, one of Jaycee’s classmates, said. “We were just talking about you.”

“Oh, yeah?” Jaycee asked in surprise.

“Yeah,” Olivia, another of Jaycee’s classmates said. “Did your sister already hook up with Rory Harris? I thought I saw them together at The Q-Bar earlier. They make such a cute couple.”

It took no effort at all to see the steam coming out of Jaycee’s ears. Oh, yeah, this was going to be a fun night.

The thing Sage hadn’t accounted for was the heels, on dirt, and gravel. They were anything but steady. The other thing she hadn’t thought to put into the whole “what to wear” equation was dirt, fire, ash, and white pants.

“Hey! It’s Rory, and woo-hoo!  Who is this hottie?” With no warning, the guy who clearly knew Rory came weaving his way over to them and draped an arm around her.

“Get a life, Trevor.” Rory batted his friend’s arm away—thankfully, because the guy stunk of bonfire smoke, cigarettes, and beer.

Somehow when Mrs. Lawrence had laid down the law, Sage had assumed this party would be tamer than the ones she had been to back home. Clearly she was wrong. Nobody was knitting here. In fact, they had passed a couple in the back of a pickup truck on the way from parking to here, and they certainly weren’t just talking.

It was then that Rory put his arm around her and pulled her close to his side. Sage looked up at him and smiled at how incredibly handsome he was. Yes, it was good to be seen here, at the party with the best-looking guy in the school. That thought trailed her as he made the party rounds giving high-fives and fist bumps to his peeps, and there were a lot of them. A quarter way around the flaming monstrosity in the road, Sage caught sight of Jaycee and Luke, standing there obviously trying very hard not to notice them.

Her heart fell at the sight. The only two people she even knew, her peeps as it were, and they wouldn’t so much as look at her. Bailing on those depressing thoughts, she flipped the switch, turned on the charm, and became the sweetest version of her fake self she had ever managed to pull off.

“Oh, Jaycee, your sister is so amazing! She looks like a fashion model!”

Luke had lost count of the number of girls, mostly classmates, some only passing acquaintances from other towns who had made it a point to come their direction specifically to ruin Jaycee’s night.

“She is not my sister!” Jaycee said under her breath, turning so that she directed that comment only to him so much so that she practically hissed it into his shirt.

“I know. I know.” His thoughts spun. He needed to do something, something to help his friend. Turning, he put his hands on her shoulders, knowing she was about to start throwing people into the fire for making that mistake. “But they don’t. Okay? They don’t know. They’re just trying to be nice.”

“Nice?” She very nearly spit the word into his face. “They’re trying to be nice?”

“Well.” He tilted and shifted his head side-to-side. “Now their definition of nice and yours in this situation are probably not exactly the same.”

“Ya think?”

He looked at her, knowing there was really no good way to salvage this night. “You know, we don’t have to stay out here. We could go. Find something else to do.”

“Go? Where?” Tears shimmered in her eyes as she pleaded with him to make the nightmare stop.

“My place? Your place? Does it matter?”

When she didn’t down the idea, he plunged forward. “Come on. I might even let you win at speed.”

A moment and one more glance at the most popular couple at the party, and Jaycee gave in. “We might as well.”

It wasn’t a ringing endorsement of his worth as a quasi-semi-sort-of date, but Luke would take it.

Where they had gone, Sage wasn’t sure. She looked for them as she stood next to Rory who was conversing with someone named Evan. At least she thought that was his name. It was hard to keep everyone straight when you only saw their faces in the shadows of the flames.

“California, huh?” Evan suddenly said to her. “What part? I’ve got family that lives out there.”

“Oh, L.A.,” she said, not wanting to make a particularly big deal of that at the moment.

“Wow. Doesn’t surprise me though. You look like you could be in the movies.” He winked at her and lifted his cup. “See y’all around.”

Sage’s ears were on fire and so was her face. It had nothing to do with the current reason for their being here. She turned back next to the fire at Rory’s side and watched as a couple of guys chased each other around the perimeter of the thing with burning sticks.

“Jerks,” Rory said under his breath. He took one more drink of whatever that had been and pitched the rest into the weeds in the ditch. “What do you say we blow this popsicle stand and find somewhere quieter?” When his arm came around her, it was warm and inviting, and in all the world Sage couldn’t find a no.

“Sure.”

When they pulled into her parents’ driveway, Luke knew they had traded one party for another. It wasn’t that there were many cars, but it looked like every light in the house was on. He shut off his car, not sure he shouldn’t just go on home. It was rounding toward a quarter to eleven, and he’s been up since sixty-thirty.

“You want to come in?” Jaycee asked, her voice soft. “Just to say hi to everyone.”

Since “everyone” didn’t include the someone who could make him do really stupid things, he decided it couldn’t hurt. “Just to say hi.”

Back in the pickup, Rory backed out of the ditch and headed out into the darkness. They had left the bonfire far behind when he reached across the seat, toyed with her shoulder strap, and then pulled her over to him. “You know, you really do look amazing tonight.”

“Thanks.” Part of her hoped he would just take her home. Part of her knew he wasn’t going home.

With the hand not wrapped around her, he reached through the steering wheel and turned on the radio. Okay, so she was tired and the music was nice, and Rory was a nice guy. What was she so worried about? With that thought, she settled back into his arm, thinking she really didn’t care where he took her. It was nice for a change to just forget everything in the rest of her miserable life.

“You’re home awfully early,” Jaycee’s mom said when she came from the living room to find her daughter rummaging around in the kitchen cabinets.

“Uh, yeah. The party got kind of boring,” Luke said, leaning there and praying they wouldn’t start asking questions. He was a horrible liar.

“Oh, did Sage and Rory make it?” Mrs. Lawrence asked.

“Uh. Yeah. They did.” He scratched the back of his head as his gaze cut over to Jaycee who had commenced filling the biggest glass he had ever seen with water from the sink. He truly admired her ability to make even that as loud as possible.

Mrs. Lawrence leaned her hip on the L-shape of the other side of the counter. “So are they coming home too?”

Luke panicked when he noticed Jaycee nearly choke on the water. “Oh, uh, I… don’t know. We kind of… lost them in the crowd.”

“Crowd?” Mr. Lawrence asked, coming from the living room and picking up a handful of nuts from a bag on the counter next to his wife. “Were there that many people out there?”

Now Luke was really panicking, and Jaycee clearly wasn’t going to help him at all. “Oh, you know, must be a slow night for everyone. Some kids from out of town came too.”

Her mother looked at her father and worry crossed both their faces.

Luke put out his hands as if trying to smother a brush fire. “Not too many. Just some. I’m sure they’ll be home any time now.”

“Well, I hope so,” Mr. Lawrence said. “Makes me nervous having my girls out all hours.”

It took next to nothing to see Jaycee’s lips wind between her teeth and clinch there. My girls…. Luke could hear the screaming in Jaycee’s brain from all the way over where he was standing. “Well, Jayc and I were just going to play a little speed. That is, if y’all don’t mind.”

“Oh, no,” Mrs. Lawrence said. “We don’t mind at all, do we, honey?”

Mr. Lawrence smiled. “Not at all.”

Chapter 7

The stop on the quiet country road wasn’t altogether unexpected although Sage did think that she had never seen the night be so dark. She laughed softly, trying to sound coy and not scared. “Huh, why are we stopping? I thought you were taking me home.”

Every move he made was smooth and calculated as he turned to her. “I will.” With a smile, he picked at the strap of her dress. “In a little while.” A moment and he slid toward her. “I thought we could, you know, have some fun first.”

Sage laughed softly again, licking her lips and fighting not to bolt out the other door as he closed the distance. “I… Uh…” She struggled for something to divert him. “You know, I’ve never… seen the stars like that.” That much was true. Besides the Hollywood kind and a few in a textbook or two, she’d never really seen the stars. Beyond the windshield, they looked almost magical.

Thankfully he stopped and backed up a half inch. The smile could have been kind or it could have been something else. “Let’s go see the stars.”

Luke really hated that clock on the wall. It kept ticking its way up and up and up. On toward midnight. On toward disaster. Jaycee had been late once, and once was all it took. He hadn’t seen her for three weeks. No phone. No parties. Just school and church.

“Ha!” Jaycee shrieked laying down her final card. “That’s three in a row!  Want to go for four?”

“Huh.” He did. Really. He wanted to stay until Sage came home, but he knew his time was running out as well. Although not as strict as Jaycee’s parents, his wouldn’t be overly thrilled if he didn’t get his little self home and tucked in bed. His sigh was long and dramatic. “I think I’m going to have to call it a night. I’ve got to be back at the garage sale early tomorrow.”

Jaycee arched her head back on her neck as if she was truly frustrated. “Ugh. Don’t say that. I’ve had enough of hauling junk out today.”

He let out another sigh and came around to her side of the table. “You and me both, darlin’. You and me both.” With that, he wrapped her into his arms for a quick just-friends hug.

“Has Sage not come in yet?” Mr. Lawrence asked, stepping in with no more warning than that, and instantly the two of them broke apart.

Jaycee put her hand up at the ponytail at the back of her head and ducked her gaze. “Uh, no. Not yet.”

There was a long awkward pause, and then Luke knew it was his time to make tracks. “I’ll just let myself out.” It was easy to leave that kitchen. A knife might not have cut the tension off of Mr. Lawrence’s face. If Sage didn’t get home soon, she might be grounded from now until forever. Then again, maybe that wouldn’t be such a bad thing. At least then she wouldn’t be out somewhere with Rory Harris. As Luke started his car, he sent up a quiet prayer for her. “God, wherever she is, please keep her safe.”

Sage was sitting on the tailgate of Rory’s truck looking up at the stars, thinking that at least out here life wasn’t completely unbearable. The breeze was soft. The night was so quiet, and the stars were truly amazing.

“You know,” Rory said as he slid closer to her and laid his hand behind her on the truck bed. “You really are beautiful.”

She glanced at him and giggled as she lifted her shoulders to her ears. “Thanks.”

“No. Really.” And with that, he closed the gap between them and captured her lips. Excitement, fear, surprise. Something went through her, yanking a gasp up. It took a second or two for her to settle into the kiss. He was dreamy, and he liked her. Maybe this was just what she needed to take her mind off of everything going on at…

Home!

The word surged through her, and she broke from him and looked at her watch. “Oh, no!” She was going in six directions at once. “No, no, no. How did it get so late?”

“What’s wrong?” He followed her off the tailgate, kind of, looking like a love-struck teenager with a bad-awful crush.

“Home. I have to get home.” Sage went one way and then the other. “It’s almost midnight. I have to be home by midnight.”

“Sage, girl. Calm down. I’m sure they’ll understand.” His slow Southern drawl was helping nothing. He slammed the tailgate jangling what was left of her nerves.

“How far away are we? Oh, they’re going to kill me.”

“Keep your shirt on. We’re only about ten minutes away.”

Sheer terror swept over her. “Ten minutes? Rory. We have to leave. We have to go now.” She was already in the pickup seat, willing him to start the thing faster.

“Chill-ax, girl. Gosh. You act like they’re going to call out the National Guard.”

Even as she sat back fighting the tears, she prayed they hadn’t done that already. That’s when she thought about her phone. She pulled it out and hit the buttons. Jaycee. She only had Jaycee’s number. The phone beeped.

“This is Jaycee. Leave me a message.”

“Jaycee, this is Sage. Can you let Dad and your mom know I’m going to be a little late? Not a lot late. I should be there in like…”

“Ten minutes,” Rory confirmed.

“Ten minutes.” She glanced at Rory who nodded but didn’t look overly happy about that. “Okay. Well, if you get this, can you tell them for me? Please?” With that, she shut the phone off and leaned back. “I am so dead.”

“I can’t believe she hasn’t at least called,” Jaycee’s mom said as she and her husband paced in the kitchen.

“You did tell him midnight, didn’t you?” Jaycee’s dad asked as Jaycee sat at the table trying not to listen and gloat. Sage was in so much trouble. Probably she shouldn’t feel so happy about that, but still she did. Knock Miss Perfect Daughter off the pedestal for a change. That couldn’t be all bad.

“Well, I’m going to hit the hay,” Jaycee said, pulling her phone from her pocket as she stood. She’d put it on silent earlier—nothing came between her and beating Luke at speed, and when she had felt it ring a few minutes before, she’d figured it was Luke telling her he’d made it. He did that sometimes. She knew it was because he had something of a crush on her, but it wasn’t like that with them. Never would be. However, when she stepped from the kitchen and headed down the hallway, she put the phone to her ear and instead of Luke, she heard Sage, sounding quite panicked actually.

At first, Jaycee spun to go back into the kitchen to tell her parents, but then she heard Rory in the background and something not very kind and helpful slid over her, dousing her spirit in blackness. Squaring her shoulders, she hit the end-call button on the phone followed instantly by the delete message button. She was not going to cover for Sage Wentworth. Not today. Not ever. And with that thought, she went to her room and quietly closed the door.

“I had a great time tonight,” Rory said as they pulled into her driveway. They weren’t just ten minutes late. It was more like 15 minutes late, and she was feeling the tick of every second.

“Yeah, me too.” If she actually quit breathing, maybe that would be better. They couldn’t yell at her if she was dead, could they?

The pickup rolled forward into the darkness slowly as he turned his gaze over to her. “No. I really had fun.” He put his hand on hers. “I hope we can do it again sometime.”

“Uh, yeah. Me too.” She didn’t even wait for the vehicle to stop before she unlatched the door. It was much farther to the ground than she remembered though and she barely got turned enough to catch the running board so she didn’t fall right out of the thing. “Ugh!”

“Oh, here! Let me help.” Rory slammed the pickup into park and hopped out the other side. However, Sage was already on the solid dirt. He met her at the front bumper and caught her for a second. “Don’t I even get a goodnight kiss?”

She never really stopped as she shook out of his grasp. “Maybe next time.” If they ever let her out of the house again. “I had a good time, Rory. Thanks!” Waving back at him, all she could make out was his silhouette in the headlights. “’night!”

With one swing of the door, she was inside, and her first thought was light in the house was not a good sign. Tip-toeing just in case they might be asleep, she went into the kitchen and found two very angry faces gazing at her. One from the table. The other from next to the cabinet.

“Oh, uh, hi,” she said with her signature soft giggle. “I didn’t know you would still be awake.”

Mrs. Lawrence took in a long breath and with one glance at her husband, she let her gaze bear down on Sage. “Do you know you are late, young lady?”

Thinking it would be best if she made light of the whole situation, Sage laughed as if nothing at all was wrong. “Oh, I know. We kind of lost track of time. It wasn’t a big deal.”

The glance they exchanged said nothing good for her.

“Sage,” her father started. “We’re trying…”

“Look, I said, ‘I know.’  We just didn’t realize it had gotten so late. Besides, it’s only a few minutes, and I called Jaycee to let her know.”

“Jaycee is not us,” Mrs. Lawrence said, coming away from the counter. “And she never said anything about a message to us.”

“Oh.” That deflated Sage’s act just slightly. “Well, I called her just a little bit ago to let her know we were on our way.”

“This is not about Jaycee.” Mrs. Lawrence looked to her husband before continuing. “This is about you. Now, I know you are probably used to doing as you please out in California, but you are not in California anymore. You’re here now. With us. And with us, you follow our rules.”

“I wasn’t that late. It was barely fifteen minutes.”

“We agreed to midnight,” her stepmother said. “Not midnight if you feel like it. When you make a commitment around here, you keep that commitment, and not keeping commitments in this family brings consequences.”

Sage didn’t like the sound of that at all. Swallowing, she knew she’d better appeal to a higher power and fast. “Dad? Look, I didn’t do it on purpose. Really, I didn’t.”

He nodded. “I know you didn’t.” The glance at Mrs. Lawrence said there might be a plea for leniency on her behalf; however, his eyes said differently when they came back to her. “But rules are rules, Sage.” His eyes pleaded with her to understand. “Now, you were late, and late around here means grounded for a week.”

“A week?” Sage nearly swooned. “Uh. Okay.” She picked her wounded pride up off the floor. “Great. Okay. Then I guess I’ll just stay in my room for a week.” The turn didn’t happen quite fast enough however.

“Not so fast,” Mrs. Lawrence said, and when Sage turned back, she caught the glance between them. She was beginning to hate her step mother. Really. Seriously. Hate her. “Grounded means no phone and extra chores.”

Sage’s eyes went wide. “No… you’re not going to take away my phone.”

This glance was less sure, but her stepmother’s gaze was steady when it came back to her. “And you’ll do the dusting for the week as well.”

If passing out was an option, she really would have taken it. “Du… dusting? You can’t be serious!”

“I’m very serious!” Now her stepmother’s voice was ratcheting up in volume and pitch. She put out her hand. “Your phone.”

In horror, Sage surged on her father. “Dad, please!  Not my phone. No. It’s how I call Mom!  Please!  Don’t let her take my phone away from me! Please!”

He let his gaze fall, and then he nodded. “You can have it for ten minutes every afternoon when Emily lets you call your mom.”

“Ten minutes? That’s not… I can’t… No!  Come on!  No!”

From her bedroom, Jaycee heard the escalation of the conversation, and although part of her considered feeling sorry for Sage, another much bigger part knew she had gotten just what she deserved. That would teach her to go around putting her nose in the air, acting like she owned everything and waltzing in and destroying a perfectly good summer. Maybe now she would know how the rest of the world lived.

By the time Sage left the kitchen, she wasn’t even trying to hide the tears. It was all so very, very unfair. How could they cut her off from her whole life like that? Who would do that to a person? Over 15 minutes? When she had even called!

She heard their quiet conversation as she fled to her room and slammed the door. Trapped and helpless. Never had she felt those two in such raw abundance in her entire life.

With only that thought she collapsed onto the lumpy, bumpy bed and screamed into her pillow. It didn’t help. Nothing would. Nothing until she got out of this horrible place. Leaving tomorrow didn’t sound like soon enough.

The sun shone in her room when Sage awoke the next morning, and the burning and pounding of her eyes reminded her of the horrors of the night before. She reached for a throw pillow and flopped it over her eyes.

“Go away and leave me alone,” she told life. The thought that she no longer had her cell phone knifed through her heart. She hadn’t even had a chance to tell Patelyn and Mac.

Patelyn and Mac. With no cell phone, how was she supposed to keep up with all the fun of Mac and Ben’s summer fling? Worse, how was she going to send out any more distress signals not just to them but to her mother as well?

“Ugh.” The moan was nearly a scream. She hated this place. She hated all of it. Every, single, solitary…

The knock on the door stopped her litany cold. In fact, it stopped her body cold as well. Frozen in time and space, she lay there listening. Maybe they hadn’t heard her. Maybe they would figure she was still asleep. Maybe they would go away.

“Sage. Sage, it’s time to get up.” Mrs. Lawrence. And something told Sage she didn’t sound as kind as she had before yesterday.

“Uh, I’ll be out in a little while,” she called, feigning happy and light though it very nearly killed her.

“Ten minutes,” Mrs. Lawrence said. “Don’t worry about dressing up. It’s Saturday. Time to get the chores done.”

Chores. A most horrible word.

Luke lay under his car, loosening the oil drain plug; however, his mind was on other things—like the night before with Jaycee and if Sage had made it home on time. Most likely the answer to that question was no. He barely made it home before midnight, and he hadn’t seen a single vehicle on the road coming or going.

Carefully he angled the oil pan underneath the flowing black liquid and reached up to wipe his sweat-covered face. It was barely ten a.m., and already the thermometer was threatening mutiny. What he wouldn’t give to just hop in the car and head out to the beach. Not just the lake, the beach. He hadn’t been there in what felt like years. Too many commitments. Too many other priorities.

As the oil began to slow, he ratcheted his shoulder around and caught the last of it. Maybe tomorrow he would get a chance to go out there. He could always ask Jaycee to go with him for company. Not that she would jump at the chance to spend time with him, but she probably wouldn’t say no either. Lifting his eyebrows and swiping at his brow with the dirty rag in his hand, he considered what it would be like if Jaycee happened to invite Sage along. Not that that would ever happen in a million-gazillion years, but it took no more than the thought to cross his mind that it was traipsing off on that same beach with only Sage.

He shook his head at that thought, thankfully missing the underpinnings of the car. It was deadly to his head and his heart to think like that. No. He had to get Sage Wentworth out of his head and off of his heart. Doing anything else was certifiably insane no matter which way you looked at it.

“This is a dust rag,” Mrs. Lawrence said, holding up the slightly oily rather dirty looking cloth. “This is dusting spray. First, you move everything off of the surface you’re going to clean.” She took three knickknacks off the top of the little bookshelf. “Then you spray some of this on.”

Sage backed up with a grimace when the older woman demonstrated by dousing the shelving with the stuff.

“Then you wipe it.” With one more swipe, she turned and held out the items to Sage who took them gingerly. “Be sure to get the corners. Don’t forget the sides or the fronts of the shelves. I expect the living room and the den to be spotless by the time we’re ready to go up to the garage sale.” Folding her arms, she looked at her reluctant soldier. “Got it?”

Holding both things up, Sage fought to smile. “Got it.”

Mrs. Lawrence leveled her gaze, considered for a moment, and then nodded. “Good. I’ll just be in the kitchen if you need anything.”

The whir of the vacuum from down the hallway by the bedrooms echoed through the house. That’s where Jaycee had been banished to do her share of the chores. Outside, the mower could be heard. Ryder.

They certainly were a busy little family. As Sage began carefully and very slowly moving the items off the next shelf, she wondered where her father was on this busy Saturday morning. Was he out with Ryder? Or had he once again disappeared into work?

She sprayed the awful stuff onto the wood and coughed it back. Menial labor. She felt like a slave or a servant. Wiping without really inspecting her own work, she went over that shelf. The next one had fewer items on it, so she moved them off and wiped it down as well. There were only books on the bottom shelf. In no time, it too was wiped down.

It was only then that she turned to see the ottoman lined neatly with all the displaced knickknacks.

“Oh!” she said, realizing her mistake. She looked at the little figurines and then at the empty shelves and back again. What went where? She had no idea.

Books. She remembered they were on the bottom shelf, so she stacked them there and then thought briefly that they didn’t look quite like they had when she started. Still, she couldn’t worry about that. She was just getting started with this task. Who knew how many more things there might be to dust?

As she placed and replaced items, the noise of the vacuum got closer and closer until it sounded like it might eat her alive. Trying to ignore the noise and the maker of such, she debated where the little set of praying hands went. First shelf or second? First. She set it there and then second-guessed that choice. Oh, to have a photographic memory.

Then again, she would have had to pay attention for longer than a blink to even have a picture of this shelf to rely on.

Mrs. Lawrence picked that moment to come back in for inspection. “Oh, honey,” she said, and the honey didn’t sound at all sweet. With one brush, she moved Sage out of the way. “It doesn’t go like that. Grandma Beatrice’s silver cup goes on top, not the praying hands.”

“Oh. S-sorry.” Feeling like a pebble in a soft shoe, she watched as Mrs. Lawrence fussed and fretted with the pieces.

“And these books!  Oh, dear. This is not how they were at all.”

The cacophony of the critique coupled with the roar of the vacuum bounced off the emotional walls inside Sage until she thought she might go mad.

“Why don’t you do the pictures on the wall over there?” Mrs. Lawrence barely acknowledged her as she pointed over to where she meant. “Don’t take them off the walls. That way it won’t be a jumbled mess when you’re through.”

Sage nodded the criticism down into her soul and turned for her newly appointed task. However, she didn’t miss the ghost of a satisfied smile that played on her sister’s face when she broke into the room from the hallway.

“Are you going up to the garage sale?” Luke’s mother asked when he was back inside downing water and a sandwich at the speed of light.

“Probably. I can’t believe how much stuff we got rid of yesterday and how much is still there.”

“They’re going to need help bagging and boxing everything at the end for the homeless shelter.”

“Great,” he said. “Something to look forward to.”

“You missed a spot,” Jaycee said from across the room.

Sage had finished the pictures and the piano, but clearly her efforts on the television were in vain.

“Who taught you to dust anyway?” With a disgusted shake of her head, Jaycee grabbed the rag from Sage and went to work on the television cabinet as if she was Miyagi on steroids.

“I… Uh…” Sage was too stunned by the onslaught to come up with a suitable response.

“There.” Coming back over, Jaycee plunked the rag back into Sage’s hands. “That’s how you dust.”

The rag was oily now, dirty too. She could feel it bleed into her hand, and it turned her stomach.

One more shake of her head coupled with a dramatic eye roll, and Jaycee started the growling vacuum cleaner again. It made Sage jump. Why did the tears have to come up? Why couldn’t she just set the stuff down and walk out of this living nightmare? It seemed so very simple, but her courage kept failing her.

“You’d better get the den done,” Jaycee yelled over the noise. “Mom wants to leave by noon-thirty.”

“Oh.” Sage nodded, beating back the tears. “Sure thing.”

When she got to the den, which was decorated, if one could call it that, in browns, golds, and this horrible tannish color, she reviewed her life. Two families who didn’t want her. Two friends she couldn’t contact. Only Rory was the bright spot in the picture.

Picture. Her mind and heart snagged on that word as she dusted the mantel of the fireplace. On it were pictures. Framed ones.

Some of them were of Jaycee and Ryder when they were small, some were more recent. It wasn’t hard to notice that she was not in a single one of them. Her heart traced back to L.A. to her house, the one she had practically grown up in ever since her mother had met and married Jason 12 years before. It didn’t have pictures, save for the giant wedding one in the foyer. It was her mother’s favorite, and so the decorators simply decorated around it every couple of years.

Oh, she had a few pictures of her and her friends in her room, but not many. It cluttered things up too much. With a resolute sigh to stop the depressing thoughts, she shook her head, banished the tears, and set about finishing her new chores.

Luke made it to the garage sale just after 2 p.m. and remarkably, people were still carrying stuff out of the building. He shook his head at the insanity of having that many things to give away. At least the church would make a fair amount of money. That was always a good thing.

Opening the door, he braced for the whoosh of cold air, probably the last he would feel for the afternoon. Outside was heating up to blazing. Inside, because people kept opening and closing the door and completely annihilating the point of the air conditioner, it wasn’t a whole lot better.

“Oh, Luke. Good. You’re here,” Macy said from her station by the dwindling assortment of kitchen ware. “Dylan just left over in the other corner. Would you mind manning over there for a while? Answer any questions, box stuff up, whatever.”

“Sure thing,” he said with a slight wave and headed to the back. At least it wasn’t carrying 800 pound furniture around.

“Sage, come on! Everyone else is ready to go.”

Yes, it was becoming clearer and clearer as the day dragged on that her welcome had been worn out. She could almost feel its tatters in her spirit. “Coming!”

Really, honestly, truthfully, Luke wasn’t watching for her, for them. He really wasn’t, but just the same, he didn’t miss their entrance. His heart jerked up in his throat as his gaze snapped over and held on them. Sage was in jeans today, nice ones, and with the purple and black slashed shirt, she looked kind of funky and spunky. He ducked to hide the smile. If he wanted to keep his neck in one piece, he’d better make a habit of not getting caught looking at her.

“What about this?” the lady in front of him said, holding up a baby toy. “Would you take 50 cents for it?”

At this point, he would take practically anything for it so he didn’t have to carry it too in a few hours. “Sure.”

“Like I said, we’re staying until everything is cleaned up,” Mrs. Lawrence said as they stood in the entrance of the hall. “So the more you all help, the quicker we’ll get to go home.”

“Noted, Mom.” Jaycee had her arms in a twist in front of her. “Can we go now?”

“Yes.” Mrs. Lawrence sighed. “Please. Go.”

And just like that, they all scattered. Everyone, that was, except for Sage. Why did she always feel so very out-of-place no matter where they went? Helping. Great. More helping. She sighed and rolled her eyes. This would be the most peachiest day of her life. She was sure of it.

Luke was buried in boxes, dragging the last of the stock out when he stood to find Sage on the other side of the table. “Oh!” His heart jerked backward, sputtered, and jittered like an engine on its last legs. “Uh. Hi.” He hoped his hands weren’t shaking as he laid the final batch of kids clothing on the table.

“Oh.” She smiled softly when she caught sight of him. “Hi. I didn’t see you there.”

He laughed. “I’m kind of hard to miss.” Trying not to look ridiculous, he spread out the remainder of pieces on the table.

“Ahh,” she said, picking up a small denim jacket. “Now this is adorable.”

Luke looked at it and raised his eyebrows. “I think… that’s a little small for you.”

She laughed at that and lowered the jacket. “Not for me, silly.” But then, she lifted it as if carried away by a daydream. “Oh, there was a time…”

The idea that she would ever consider wearing that even as a toddler dragged up even more skepticism. “You would’ve worn that?”

“Well, not like this exactly.” When she looked up at him, the realization that he had just watched her in her daydream danced across her lovely face. “I mean…” She let the little vest drop to her waist, but she didn’t put it down. “A long time ago, in a land far, far away, I used to do upcycling.”

“Upcycling? Is that anything like unicycling?”

Her laugh was back. He liked that laugh.

“No.” She dragged the syllable out to six. “Upcycling is when you take something plain like this jacket, and you sew things on it.”

“Things? Like what things?”

“Things. Buttons, beads, lace. You pretty it up.” She reached over to the scraps of fabric on the next table, bringing a twine of pink lace. “See, you take the jacket and you add lace to make little cap sleeves, like this.” Not waiting for his reaction, she melted. “Oh, that would be so cute.”

Without thinking that she wouldn’t understand, Luke nodded. “Alyssa would be in heaven with that.”

Sage tipped her head. “Alyssa?”

Why did his ears suddenly feel like they were on fire? “My niece. My sister’s oldest. She’s four and all girl.”

The smile wound up onto Sage’s face. “Being all girl isn’t that bad.”

Looking at her, he couldn’t agree more. “So how much would you charge me?”

“Charge you? For what?”

“To make it for her? Her birthday’s coming up the middle of July, and Uncle Luke is always at a loss for what to give her.”

At that Sage really did put it down. “Yeah. Right.”

“Hey, I’m serious. I think Jaycee’s mom has a sewing machine.”

The look she sent him had him fleeing for his life, but then she softened. “She probably wouldn’t let me anywhere near it.”

Her enthusiasm dipped even further brushing all the way into the melancholy paint of life just as another customer came up and fingered through the offerings. However, Luke noticed how Sage moved the vest protectively out of the line of sight. When the other person moved on, Luke retrained his gaze on her.

“Why wouldn’t she let you? You sound like she wants to use your liver in her witch’s brew.”

“I think she does.”

Another customer came by but didn’t really stop.

“Why’s that?”

Her hands and the vest fell to the table. “Well, after last night, I’m pretty much persona non grata.”

“That bad?”

“Worse.”

“They took my phone, and now I have to dust.” She said it and shivered as if spiders were crawling all over her.

He grimaced for her plight. “Yeah. Manual labor. That stinks.”

“Tell me about it.” She sighed again. “But, you know, I could even deal with that if they just would let me have my phone. I can’t even call my mom.”

“You must miss her a lot, huh?” Unforeseen compassion for her glided into his heart and rested there.

Sage just lifted her head and then nodded. She never even said the word.

The horrible understanding that she was trying not to cry thundered through his spirit, raking up a need to protect her he hadn’t even known was there. “That must be really hard, leaving everything you know, coming here, to the middle of nowhere, staying with people you hardly even know.”

She blew out a long breath and then shook her head. “I thought I could do it, you know? Come, do what they all wanted me to, smile through it all, but…” With a close of her eyes, it was like she changed into someone completely different. When she looked up, her smile was forced and hard. “But I can’t seem to make anyone understand that I’m just trying to do that, so I guess…”

However, her brave front came to a crumbling stop, and she put her head down again.

Luke wanted to put his arms around her so badly, it took his breath away. But they were in the middle of half the community not to mention there was a table between them.

“I’m sure,” he started just as Jaycee walked up next to him.

“Think we can get rid of all this stuff by four?” she asked, and Sage’s gaze snapped up to her sister and then drifted back down to the little jacket she was now only fingering as it lay on the table.

When her gaze came back up, she smiled that same hard, forced one. “I’d better be…” She didn’t finish the thought, picked her fingers up from the vest and pink lace completely and walked away.

A moment and Jaycee’s hard stare fell into a scowl as she watched her sister leave. “Sorry. I would’ve come to save you sooner, but they had me stacking the empty boxes in the kitchen.”

“Save me?” Luke asked, reaching over and lifting the two items. “From what?”

“Miss Amazingly Obnoxious. What else?” Jaycee ducked closer to him. “She got busted last night though. Big time. It was awesome.”

Luke wasn’t sure he liked the feeling that went through him. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a couple of bills, putting them into the cash bag. “So she really broke curfew then?”

“Yeah. Fifteen minutes. I thought Mom was going to have a cow. I’m surprised you didn’t hear the yelling.”

So that’s why she had lost her phone and presumably why she was now dusting as well. The memory of her reaction to that word sank into him as he put the items in a small plastic bag. “If you don’t mind, I’m going to run this out to my car.”

Jaycee shrugged. “Fine by me.”

Sage noted with some curiosity how quickly Luke abandoned his post by Jaycee, but she dismissed that. What did she care what he did or didn’t do? Then she wondered about her own sanity. Why had she said all of that to him? He was Jaycee’s friend. Not hers. Forgetting that would not be a smart move, she was almost sure of it.

At that moment the door to the hall opened, and in walked none other than Rory Harris. Joy burst through her as she smiled and waved to him, one bright spot in a sea of black ink. However, instead of returning her greeting, he swiped his fingers through his hair and swept his gaze over the rest of the crowd as if seeing if there was someone better he needed to talk with first. Hurt slashed through her, but she beat that down, realizing she was being completely ridiculous. He had just come in from the sunshine. Of course he had to let his eyes adjust to the new lighting.

Truthfully, she didn’t know why. Maybe it was just because she so needed to see someone who didn’t want to pitch her overboard, but in that moment, she did something she couldn’t remember ever doing before. She brightened her smile and headed right toward him.

Of course, almost to him, it occurred to her that everyone could see them and was probably watching. Still, she didn’t care. She was happy to see him, and she didn’t really care who knew it.

“Hey,” she said, softening the word with her smile and her eyes.

“Oh, hey,” he said, gazing down at her.

She wanted to reach out to him, for him to reach out to her, but neither happened so she ended up standing there awkwardly. Her body swayed back and forth, and she knew she looked like a lovesick puppy. “I was hoping you’d come today.”

“Yeah.” The word was short, almost dismissive.

“Um.” Ducking her head, she tried to figure out why he seemed so distant, almost cold. “I had fun last night.”

Then his dark brown eyes slid down to her and held. “Really?”

That backed her up a step. “Yes. Really. Why? I wasn’t supposed to have a good time?”

“Oh. Well, I just wasn’t sure, that’s all.”

Memories spun in Sage’s mind. Why would he think she hadn’t had a good time? What had she done to make him this ice cold? “Did I miss something?”

“I don’t know. Did I?”

Her natural flirtatious self started flirting with anger. She twisted her arms in front of her. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“I don’t know. You tell me.” He looked almost as angry as she felt. “We go out, we have fun… or so I thought, and then today you won’t even answer my texts or my calls? What’s up with that?”

“Oh!” The word came out in a rush of a breath. “You… Oh, Rory, I’m so sorry.” Horror at what he must think of her spun through her spirit. She reached over and wound her hands into his arms. “No. I… my… Mrs. Lawrence… they took my phone away last night… because we were late. I haven’t had my phone all night or today. You’ve gotta believe me. If I would’ve had my phone, I would never have blown you off like that. I’m so sorry.”

How a person could be so high on life one minute and then next be crashed and burned in a blazing, smoke-charred pit on the ground the next, Luke had no idea. But one second he was outside the door in the sunshine feeling like whistling and shouting to the world, and the next he was inside under the blasting cold air remembering what universe he really inhabited.

Ducking his head with a rub on his neck to gather up the splintering pieces of his heart, he headed back over to the tables, trying not to look but unable not to. What was he thinking? That Sage liked him? That she noticed him? What would possess him to think that? He had to be an absolute moron to even let the thought cross his heart.

“So how many boxes you think we’re going to end up taking to the shelter?” Jaycee asked when he came aside of her.

His glance back to the door did his heart and head no good at all.

Her gaze followed his, and the frown solidified that she had seen them too. “Unbelievable, right? Even grounded she makes better time than I do.”

“One hour to closing!” Macy yelled over the crowd noise. “Everything is 75% off for the next hour.”

Great. He’d just aced himself out of the sale of the century not to mention the girl of his dreams in five minutes flat. That was about par for his luck.

“They seriously grounded you for being a few minutes late?” Rory asked, finally uncoiling.

Sage let her hands drop and put her head down. “One week in the brig. No phone. No dates. No nothing.”

“What’re they going to do, lock you in your room and throw away the key?”

Seeing her opening, she arched her eyes up to him, tilted her head, and batted her eyelashes. “Well, I’m here now, aren’t I?”

The smile broke through his seriousness. “That you are, little lady. That you are.”

Chapter 8

Luke wanted to spend as little time around the lovebirds as possible. Thankfully, Jaycee had similar aspirations. So when the final call went out that the shopping was now over, the two of them started grabbing up boxes from the floor and stuffing in whatever would fit in them. It was clothing. They probably should have folded it a bit nicer, but stuffing felt so much better.

“So you think he’s asked her to the prom yet?” Jaycee asked, the scowl saying everything the acid in the words didn’t.

“She’s probably pickin’ out the weddin’ dress as we speak.”

Jaycee stopped stuffing and looked at him. There was an almost smile on her face.

That made Luke stop. “What?”

She started stuffing again, but slower now, without the animosity. “You. It’s nice to see you’re finally on my side with this thing.”

“What? That her and Rory should stay as far away from each other as humanly possible?”

“No. That she’s the queen of I’m-so-wonderful-everyone-should-fall-at-my-feet-and-we-hate-her.”

“Oh, well, now, I wouldn’t go that far. Sage isn’t all that bad. It’s Rory Harris that should take a long run off a short pier.”

Now Jaycee was more contemplative than angry. “What do you have against him anyway? I mean other than the fact that he’s amazing and dreamy and all.”

“Amazing?” Luke looked at her as if she had lost her mind. “Dreamy? Try overblown ego with an attitude to match.”

“I think someone is jealous.”

He raised his eyebrows at that. “Of Rory Harris? Yeah. I’m jealous. That’s totally it.”

Jaycee laughed and thankfully dropped the subject. However, Luke couldn’t quite shake the question. Was he? Was he really jealous of Rory Harris? And if so, why?

“I’m going to ride with Rory to drop off the boxes,” Sage said as Mrs. Lawrence stood with five women, discussing the weekend’s haul.

Her stepmother turned, her arms already folded at her middle. “Uh. No. You’re staying here until we leave.”

“But…”

“Mom,” Jaycee said from the other side of the table, “Luke’s going to take me home.”

“Okay, honey.” Mrs. Lawrence waved. “You all drive carefully.”

“We will.” And just before she turned, Jaycee offered a wicked smile to Sage. “Have fun in the Mom-mobile.”

Sage could have burned her sister alive. Her conscience jerked her up short on that one, but it was very close to the truth. “Why did Jaycee get to go?” she whined, knowing she was whining and frankly not really caring all that much.

“Because,” When Mrs. Lawrence turned, she ducked her head and lowered her voice one notch over menacing. “Jaycee can tell time unlike some people I know.”

“Sage!” Rory called from by the door. “You comin’?”

Why did it feel like every person in the whole place stopped to hear her answer? Lifting her chin and swallowing down her pride and tears, she walked resolutely over to him. She tried to soften the blow with her eyes. “I’m sorry, Rory. I guess I have to stay here a while.”

“Here?” He tilted his head as if his ears must not be working right. “It’s just over to the shelter. What’m I gonna do, break you in half?”

Truly Sage hated this. She was not a child, and she did not relish being treated like one. “It’s just this time,” she said coyly. “I’ll make it up to you next weekend.”

His chin drifted upward as he put his arms to her waist. “Is that a promise?”

“It’s whatever you want it to be.”

After dropping off the boxes, Luke and Jaycee headed to her house. It was nearly nine. Where had that much time gone? Taking his gaze off the road for a second, he glanced over at her. “You’re awful quiet.”

“Yeah.” She picked her hand up to her head and rested them both against the door. “I don’t know. I just… when I think about them, about her and Rory, I just get…”

“Completely certifiable?”

“That’s bad, huh?”

“Hey, you wouldn’t be you without it.”

Jaycee smiled and punched his arm. “Hey.”

However, Luke just shook his head and looked back to the road. “You could do so much better than Rory Harris, Jaycee. You’ve got to see that.”

She sighed. “I guess. It’s just, you know, for once, I’d like the prince to look my way, to see me.” With a shake of her head, she sighed again. “But that stuff only happens in the fairy tale books. Wake up, Jaycee. Prince Charming is not coming to sweep you off your feet.”

Once again, Luke looked over at her. “Being a little melodramatic there, aren’t you?”

“What? Look at me. I’m nearly 18 years old, and what do I have to show for it? I’m here. In a car. With you. Woohoo. Give me a medal.”

The stab went through his heart as if she’d actually wielded a knife. “You really think Rory Harris is Prince Charming? Come on, Jayc. He’s got hype going for him and that’s about it.”

“He is not that bad.”

“Yes. He. Is.” Luke glanced at her again and then retrained his eyes on the road. “I don’t know why you can’t see that.”

“And I don’t know why you can’t see how perfect he would be for me.”

Luke chose not to say what went through his head and jabbed into his heart. Yeah, well, Mr. Wonderful is currently out somewhere pawing your sister, so it’s kinda hard to picture him with you right now. He swallowed that comment down and shook his head. Jaycee would never understand what Rory really was, and as much as he didn’t want to admit it, he would probably never have a chance with Sage with Rory anywhere in the picture. The truth was, it was all a complicated mess, and the drama was starting to wear on his nerves.

“So you’ll be in church tomorrow?” Jaycee asked as they pulled into her driveway to find the Mom-mobile parked there.

“As usual.”

She nodded as he stopped the car and put it into park. “Good.” With that, she arched across the seat and kissed his cheek. “See ya then.” In a blink she was out of his car and walking up the sidewalk.

The sigh hurt. “Yeah. See ya.”

“May I have my phone?” Sage asked Saturday night, deciding if she didn’t ask, they weren’t going to remember.

“Well.” Mrs. Lawrence turned from her cooking. “I suppose. Ten minutes and then it’s mine for the night.” She reached up into the cabinet and snagged the jeweled case from the shelf.

Amazing how much better Sage felt with it in her hands.

“Ten minutes.”

At home, Luke climbed out and bounded up the three steps and into the back door. The smell of something delicious met his nostrils, and he wished right then that he would never have to leave.

“Something smells amazing,” he said, breaking through the darkness of the mud room into the kitchen.

“Meatloaf,” his mother said. “Hope you’re hungry.”

“Starving.”

He kicked his shoes back into the mudroom, holding onto the wall when his left one didn’t cooperate.

“Did you take Jaycee home? I saw you two leave together.”

“Uh, yeah. She helped me take the boxes to the shelter.”

“I really like her.”

“I know, Mom. You’ve told me that about a dozen times.”

She banged a spoon on the potato pan. “Why haven’t you two hooked up or gone out or whatever it is you say these days?”

“We’re just friends.” He went to the cabinet and snagged a glass for some water.

“Well, that could be a nice place to start.”

The drink was gone in one, long guzzle. Then he pitched the tiny bit remaining into the sink. “Tell you what, Mom. When I decide I need advice about girls, I’ll call you.” He set the glass on the counter and headed to his room.

“You do that!”

S.

O.

S.

Sage typed the letters as if her life depended on it, and at the moment, it felt like it did. Please be there, Mac. Please answer. I’ve GOT to talk with someone sane.

She stopped. She waited.

Nothing.

“Mom,” she whispered, and her fingers went into overdrive. Mom, please. I can’t stay here. They took my phone. I’m grounded. Please. I want to go home.

Sent.

Life began to coil around her chest. What if they left her here? What if no one ever came to get her? What if?

The phone buzzed in her hand, and hope surged in her. She looked at the number but didn’t recognize it.

Hey, babe. Wasup?

“Hey, babe?” The words were a breath as she fought to figure it out. Then it hit her.

Rory? She typed the name as if her fingers were on fire.

‘Course, doll-face. Who else? So you got your phone back.

Ten minutes, she typed. Four now.

You free tonight?

Free. That was an ironic word. Uh, no. Grounded. Remember?

Yeah, but, you could get out of it, right? I mean, to see me.

Get out of it? Did he mean sneak out? Sage backed up a bit at that thought. Yes, it was unfair. Yes, she wanted to see him. But wasn’t sneaking out crossing some line somewhere? I don’t think so, Rory. Wish I could, but they would freak.

Why would they have to know?

The idea batted itself around in her head. They would know. They would find out. That much she knew. No. Not tonight. Maybe next week.

Your loss.

The phone buzzed again, and she clicked the blinking neon green button.

You’re such a drama-queen. It was her mother, and Sage’s hope meter fell to below measureable. You’re there, Sage. Make the best of it. August isn’t that far away.

“Sage?” Mrs. Lawrence was by her door.

“Yeah?” The syllable came out a squeak.

“Time to give the phone back.”

It buzzed just as she stood. MacKenzie. Helplessness overtook Sage’s whole spirit. 24 more hours before she could reach out and grab for the real world again. Sorry, Mac. Can’t talk now. Gotta go.

The hot pink maxi-dress wasn’t the most formal thing Sage owned, but the little church in this backwoods town hardly qualified for wearing Armani. She was up and dressed before the first knock. Not that she was excited about going to church, but getting out of the house would be a definite improvement.

The thought that Rory might be there was a tug as well. Of course, she hadn’t seen him there last time, but she hadn’t been looking either. So it was a possibility. She applied the lipstick, smoothed it out, and stepped back. Overall, not too bad.

“Sage, honey.” It was Mrs. Lawrence, and Sage fought to get light into her voice.

“I’ll be out in a minute.”

“Take your time. We’ll be leaving in an hour. I thought you might want some breakfast.”

Breakfast. Little crunchy yellow things in the bottom of a bowl. Oh, joy.

“Be right there!”

At the mirror, Luke fought with his tie. He wasn’t particularly fond of the things, but for her, he would brave it. Her. Sage.

One part of his heart felt a bit guilty that the name Jaycee didn’t follow that statement. However, another part said that she’d made it abundantly clear he was not her forever guy. Not that Sage had either. He thought about the little sack in the passenger’s seat of his car. If he got the chance, would he have the guts to give it to her? To make that request?

She might very well laugh at him, and he wasn’t sure he would blame her. Still, he couldn’t deny what his heart said every time he thought about her. He wished then that he wasn’t so awkward, that he was cooler. Then she would notice him like he had noticed her, and with that little nudge, his thoughts flitted off to a beach at sunset with the two of them not caring if the world ever figured out they were missing.

Sage was smart enough to hang back behind the rest of her family as they entered the church. No use to cause more trouble than need be. She looked around, in and out of the church-goers, but Rory was not to be seen. Her heart did a little dance through her chest when she thought about his request the night before. He couldn’t have been serious, could he?

“Well, Gregory, so good to see you and your lovely family,” Pastor Steve said as they made their way through the lobby to the steps and the double doors.

“Wouldn’t miss it, Pastor,” her father said, shaking the man’s hand.

Instinctively, Sage melted back into them, her gaze down, her only thought get in the church without drawing attention to yourself.

“And Sage,” the pastor said, and she cringed. “How long are you going to be here? Through the whole summer?”

She forced down the air as she smiled at him demurely. “Until mid-August.” Her glance at her family members solidified the understanding that every last one of them was swallowing what they really wanted to say about that timetable.

Mrs. Lawrence managed a fake smile at the pastor. “She’ll be heading back to California on the 12th, going back to school. Senior year.”

“Oh, well, how exciting.” Pastor Steve smiled at her, and it was weird how it actually looked like a real smile. “So then, will you be coming again for our meal next weekend?”

“Meal?” she asked fully not comprehending the question.

“Meal.” He looked from her to the others as if surprised she had forgotten. “For the less fortunate. The next one is coming up on Saturday. We would love to have your help.”

“Oh. Yay,” she said, praying she sounded excited and not horrified. “Yep. I’ll be there.”

“Fabulous.” How anyone could look so utterly pleased about that, she would never know.

“Well, we’d better get inside,” Mrs. Lawrence said, and this smile was no more genuine than the first.

“Oh, yes. Yes. Of course.”

When Jaycee stepped in front of Sage, the look her sister gave her could have melted steel. Sage wanted to ask What did I do? But she didn’t dare. As she climbed the steps, the feeling of the others in the lobby looking her direction seeped into her. When would they ever stop? Sure, she usually loved attention, but not like this. No, definitely not like this.

Luke saw her the moment she stepped into the church. She would be hard to miss in that extra-long sundress thing she had on. It was neon pink and curved in all the right places. Her hair was down in waves of blonde today. He liked that, all of it. Right up to the moment her eyes chanced up and met his.

She didn’t recognize him at first, maybe she didn’t even really see him. But that look in her eyes—at once lost, sad, withdrawn and withdrawing. He smiled at her, not a grin, but just giving her a safe place to be for a second. And then there was recognition in her eyes followed by a small, almost non-existent smile of thanks.

In the next second she glanced over at Jaycee, and Luke’s gaze followed. Anger and pure hatred met his eyes, and he dropped his gaze to the carpet, maybe in embarrassment, maybe in awkwardness at being caught looking at Sage. As much as he might fantasize about Sage, from that moment on, he knew he would never make so much as a move in that direction. Because if he ever did, he would surely lose the best friend he’d ever had.

There was no reason to antagonize her quasi-family any more than necessary, so Sage mostly laid low and stayed in her room for the remainder of her grounding. At night, she would hear them out in the living room, watching television or just talking. She didn’t go out there. She didn’t dare. They didn’t want her with them. She wasn’t a real part of them. She was more like a ghost, a ghost no one really wanted around.

Having nothing else to do, she read some and thought more. What would she be doing if she was back home? Once, on Tuesday night she got in touch with Patelyn for a few minutes on the cell phone—just texting. Mac and Ben had had a fight. Patelyn wasn’t sure what it was about, but they might be broken up. Then again, they might not be. It was nice to hear about something normal for a change.

Saturday morning, the official day of her formal release on good behavior, Sage got up and dressed in her jeans and navy almost-off-the-shoulders top. No reason to get dressy. She was just going to dust and then go with Jaycee to the meal day thing. Jaycee had gone the day before with that Luke guy to get the groceries, and although Sage wanted to ask what was on the menu, she chose not to for the sake of family relations.

She was halfway through her dusting routine when Mrs. Lawrence came into the den.

“Oh! Sage.” She sounded surprised. “You’re… dusting.”

“Figured I’d get a jump on it so we’re not late for the meal-thingy.”

Mrs. Lawrence’s face fell into something of a scowl. “Oh. I don’t think you’re going to that. Did you not hear Jaycee last night? She got sick about three in the morning. She’s not going anywhere today.”

Horror at the thought of having to spend another entire day stuck in her room struck Sage like a flash of lightning. “She’s not going?”

“Not unless she wants to get the rest of the town sick.” Mrs. Lawrence went to the side closet and retrieved something from its depths. “No. Looks like you’re stuck here today. Sorry.” She headed back out.

“Oh. Huh.” It was kind of a laugh, almost a cry. “Well, I told Pastor Steve I would be there. I don’t want to let him down.”

“I’m sure they will be fine without your help.”

Sage wasn’t sure she like the way the older woman said help. It was as if her “help” wasn’t help at all. “Yes, well.” She drew herself up to her full height and put her head back. “I gave him my word, and I don’t want to let him down.”

That stopped Mrs. Lawrence, and she turned as if uncomprehending. “Sage, honey. I’m giving you an out here. I’m saying you don’t have to go.”

“Well, what if I want to go?” Just why she said it, she would never be sure; however, once the words were out of her mouth, she was not going to back down. In fact, had the house come down around her, she wouldn’t have budged because of the look of barely-concealed surprise and derision in her stepmother’s eyes.

“How are you going to get there?”

“I could take Jaycee’s car.”

That brought out a laugh. “I don’t think so. Jaycee would skin us both.”

“Okay.” That stopped her but only for a breath. “Then you could take me, or I’ll call that guy… Luke. He can take me. Or I’ll text Rory, maybe he could come and get me.”

Mrs. Lawrence waved her hands. “Okay. Okay. Fine. I’ll take you, and I’ll call Greg and he can come pick you up on his way back from golfing.”

Why she suddenly felt the rush of having won, Sage had no idea. After all, what had she just won? A whole afternoon with people she had no desire to be around? It was some victory. However, she wasn’t going to tell anyone that.

“I’ll be ready in ten minutes,” Mrs. Lawrence said.

“I’ll be in the van in five.”

Luke was elbow-deep in taco meat when the door on the other side of the kitchen opened and in stepped the dream he’d been having for a week or more. She could stop traffic even when there wasn’t any. Against what his instinct was telling him to do, he ducked his head and resumed his stirring.

“Well, well, if it isn’t Miss Sage,” Ms. P said from her station arranging the toppings for the Mexican stack meal.

Reaching up to wipe his forehead with his forearm, Luke chanced another glance over to her as the door shut behind her. Without the sunlight pouring in from behind her back, she almost lost the full angelic effect. Almost. But not quite.

“Sage Wentworth, reporting for duty.” Sage pulled herself up straight and saluted. There was almost a smile that accompanied that salute. At least he thought there was, but he could very well be hallucinating.

“Did you forget your sister?” Ms. P asked, gazing past Sage at the now-closed door.

“Forget?” Sage put her hands in the front pockets of her jeans and hiked both shoulders. “No, I didn’t forget. Jaycee got super sick this morning. She’s not coming.”

Ms. P nodded and assessed the volunteer in front of her. “And yet you came anyway.”

The look on Sage’s face went from hopeful to helpless. “I told Pastor Steve I would be here, and here I am.”

The good pastor chose that moment to breeze in from the other way. “Oh, Sage. So glad you could make it. I need help with the drinks out here. Do you mind?”

“No.” A small, nearly inaudible giggle sprang from her. “I don’t mind. I’m at your service.”

“Great. Perfect. Come on. You can fill the water coolers.”

This smile was almost real. “Perfect.”

And with that, she crossed the room and followed Pastor Steve out.

Luke waited as long as he possibly could before looking over at Ms. P. She looked at him and weaved her head from side-to-side, her eyes wide with Oh, Lord, help us all written in them. Part of him couldn’t disagree, but the other part just wanted that part to shut up.

The door opened again and Rachel and Monica walked in.

“Oh, thank Heavens,” Ms. P said. “Help has arrived!”

As he trekked in and out of the kitchen for the next couple of hours, Luke would look for her without getting formal permission from his mind to do so. She was at the drink station for whole periods of time, but then, on one such trip, he glanced over to the drink table only to find it empty. His heart jerked forward as he relocated his gaze to the full pan of taco meat he was replacing in the warming bins. If he wasn’t careful, he was going to seriously burn his hands off.

Just as the transfer was made, he caught sight of her ambling down one walkway between tables filled with humanity. Someone said something to her, and she turned with a smile that lit his world with one jolt. She nodded at the person sitting at the table and headed off to get whatever she’d been sent for.

The others were working as well—bringing more cheese, more lettuce, more everything. Today’s crowd outdid every one they had seen in months, and as he looked out over them, peace that he was making a difference swept through him. He might not be a preacher. He might not be super brilliant, but in this small way, he was doing something good, and that made his heart feel good. He lifted the empty pan and headed back for the kitchen.

Sage couldn’t have explained it had she been facing a firing squad, but today, here, life was almost… fun. At least she wasn’t in her room, staring at the walls, praying for it to get dark enough to warrant going to sleep.

Even better, it was daylight and she was outside of the house without Jaycee right there to ruin any second of peace she might stumble upon. Okay, so Rory hadn’t shown up, but even that was okay.

“Here you go.” She set the sugar packets down for the elderly gentleman who had called her sweetheart. He was four times her age with faded blue eyes, but he was still suave in his own way. “Is that all?”

“Thank you, darlin’,” he said with a nod. “This lemonade will be even sweeter because you brought me these.”

“Well,” Sage said, brushing her hair back, “you enjoy that lemonade then.”

“Oh, I will. I will.”

She smiled at him again and started back to the front drink table.

“Miss?” another gentleman three seats down said. “Could I get a refill of tea?”

“Of course. Coming right up.”

At a quarter to two, Luke was scraping out the last of the meat, hoping it would hold out just a little longer when Sage breezed into the kitchen.

“Can someone point me to the napkins? We seem to be out,” Sage said in that sweet voice she had. It clinked like tiny bells on his ears.

“Luke,” Ms. P said. “Can you get those? I’ve got to get this cheese out.”

“Oh, sure thing.” With his hands going one way and his body the other, he managed to drop the pan in his hands onto the counter with a loud clang. Ugh. Why couldn’t he be smooth about things? Wiping his hands on his jeans, he strode across the kitchen to where she stood.

Dang, she was even more gorgeous up close. He half-smiled at her, hoping she would just stay where she was while he got the napkins. However, he wasn’t that lucky. No. She followed him right into the back hallway, which was dark as usual, and that clanged down his soul as loudly as the pan had hit that counter.

“Thank you for getting them for me,” Sage said, and those bells tickled across his ears, “but you could have just told me where they were.”

“Oh, it’s okay.” He opened the closet and pulled on the light. “They’re kind of high up. I’m not sure you could’ve reached them anyway.” Praying he wouldn’t drop them, bobble them, or in any other way make a complete fool of himself, Luke carefully retrieved the large package of napkins.

She looked at them doubtfully. “I don’t think we need all of those. Just like a handful or something.”

Luke nodded, not trusting his voice. He ripped into the bag and pulled some out. “That enough?”

Her reply was a breath of a laugh. “I’m sure, and if I need more, I know where they are now.”

“That you do.” He replaced the bag and clicked off the light, backing out of the closet so he could close the door. When he turned, she was still there, watching him. Panic lit through him. “Did you need something else?”

“Oh. No. No. Just napkins.” She laughed again, and he had the thought that if they didn’t get out of this closed-in space soon, he might in fact pass out. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” He let the drawl sound in his voice as she half-turned, and he followed her out. “Any time, Ma’m.”

Her smile when she flipped her hair and gazed back at him very nearly sent him sprawling into the floor as his feet forgot how to walk. And with that, she went back out of the kitchen.

Luke wasn’t at all sure who had turned up the furnace, but he wondered as he went back to his own work what they were thinking doing such a thing with the temperature outside flirting with 100. Flirting. The word went through him like a knife. Had she been flirting with him? If she wasn’t, he was sure of only one thing, he would be mincemeat if she ever did.

“You can take these back to be washed,” Mrs. Mitchell said as Sage wondered when her father would show up to collect her. Even if helping serve was getting easier, being on the clean-up crew was not her idea of fun.

However, Mrs. Mitchell did not seem to notice that Sage hadn’t signed up for this. Without even asking, she handed two pans to her, and in a blink Sage found herself standing, holding two pans with no clue what to do with them.

“Take them into the kitchen and give them to Luke,” Mrs. Mitchell said, wiping down the line counter.

“Oh. Okay.”

Luke. Well, at least she hadn’t said to give them to Ms. P. Sage still had the feeling that Ms. P wasn’t thrilled with her being in the kitchen. Luke, however, was far less threatening.

Holding onto that mere piece of luck, Sage went into the kitchen where she found Luke at the sink, an incredible stack of stainless steel next to him.

“I think these are for you,” Sage said, putting the pans on the counter with the rest of the things he was washing.

“Oh, gee, thanks,” he said, and there was no doubt of the sarcasm of that statement.

Wickedness slipped into her spirit. “Don’t thank me yet. There’s plenty more where that came from.” She turned and headed for the door.

“Thanks for the warning.”

“You’re welcome,” she called over her shoulder. Back at the line, she stacked two pans that Mrs. Mitchell had pulled out. “These go to be washed?”

“Uh, yeah. All of this does.”

“Wow. Luke’s going to be here all night.” She walked back into the kitchen and over to the counter where these two joined the others.

“Is there much more out there?” he asked, sounding on the verge of giving up.

She shook her head. “Don’t ask. It would only depress you.”

“That’s encouraging.”

“Just trying to help!”

As much as he hated washing dishes, Luke was having an immense amount of fun watching her walk in and out. He began to notice that each time she came back, she would say something to him. “Don’t quit your day job.” “I feel like Santa.” “I hope you don’t blame me for this.”

Each time he retorted the comment, but each one brushed across his heart like the gentle wing of an angel. By the time she brought the final items from the line, he was sad to see her reason for coming back here go.

“That’s it,” she said after stacking the last two empty bowls that had been full of cheese at the very end.

“You sure? I haven’t seen the water cooler or tea thing.”

She snapped her fingers. “Tea thing. Right. I’ll be back.”

He could hardly hold the laugh as he watched her go through the other door. In seconds she was back, hefting the tea dispenser.

“Ask and it shall be given,” he said, shaking his head. Just then he realized she was going to have the thing all over the floor if she tried to get it up onto that counter by herself. “Oh, here.” And with no more than that, he was next to her, picking the thing up and setting it gently down.

“Whew. Manual labor.” She swiped off her hands and wiped them on the backs of her jeans. “Not my forte.”

“You need help with the water?” When he stepped back, how close she was washed over him.

“I think I can get it, but don’t go too far.” With a wink, she headed back out, and Luke froze solid to the spot.

“Luke, these dishes are not doing themselves,” Ms. P said, bustling about as she stacked more pans on the other side of the counter.

He shook his head to clear it of the intoxication and went back to work. “I’m on it.”

Sage couldn’t explain it, but it was very much like remembering what sunshine felt like. Never would she have thought she would feel that way immersed in dirty pots and pans, but every time she went into that kitchen, her spirit said it was filled with warmth and safety. Maybe the first real safety she had felt since landing here three weeks before.

“Finally. That’s the last of it,” she said, setting the water dispenser up on the counter. This one was almost empty so it wasn’t the impossible task the tea one had proven to be. Stepping back, she put her hands on her hips. “Wow.”

“Yeah. Wow,” Luke said from the sink, looking over the pile. “So, you just going to bring them all in here and then leave me with all the hard work?”

“Hey, I brought them. You should be grateful.”

“Oh, I am. I am. Grateful is my middle name.”

“Luke. Grateful.” She came over to his side, leaned her elbows on the sink next to him and looked up at him playfully. “I-don’t-know-your-last-name. Yep. That has a lovely ring to it, don’t you think?”

His gaze fell to hers, and he shook his head. “Hey there, Ms. Sarcastic, you know how to use a dish towel?”

Her eyebrows came up. “Do I look like I know how to use a dish towel?”

“No.” He tried not to smile, but he did anyway. “But maybe it’s time you learned.” Jerking his chin up, he indicated the other side of the counter. “They’re over there in that top drawer.”

Waiting one more second, Sage picked herself up. “I said I don’t know how to use one.”

He shook his head again. “Just get a towel and start drying, Ms. Hollywood.”

From anyone else, she probably would have taken the moniker as an insult. Somehow, from him, it didn’t sound like one. She got one of the towels, trying not to notice all the holes in it. Back at his side, she picked up one small pan from the top of the new stack he was creating in the draining sink. Running it back and forth to dry the pan, she let out a breath. Strange how a month ago she never would have pictured herself doing such a thing.

“At least we didn’t have spaghetti today,” he said, leaning over just enough to bump her shoulder.

“Ugh. Don’t remind me.” She set that pan down to the side and grabbed up another one before leaning toward him. “I’m surprised Ms. P even let me in the kitchen today.”

“You and me both.” He smiled down at her, and Sage had that feeling of knowing she was safe again.

“I’m not exactly a kitchen kind of person,” she said, not looking up at him.

“Nah. You totally could have fooled me.”

“Really,” and her tone dropped into serious. “All of this is just so… surreal to me. The people. This.” She held up a pan and then set it down. “It’s so not…”

“You?” he asked gently. “I’d have never guessed.”

With a shrug she pulled up another pan. “The weirdest thing is how nice it is to be here. Today. At least I’m not staring at my walls, wishing I could be somewhere else.”

“You don’t want to be somewhere else?” He sounded actually concerned as if her feelings mattered one way or the other to him.

“Well, this is definitely better than the alternative. Believe me, I have a new appreciation for the torture of solitary confinement.”

“That bad, huh?”

She retrieved another pan as he replenished her stack. “I’m telling you, I thought I was going to lose my mind when I didn’t have my cell phone last week. At least I finally got that back.”

“Yeah. They can be pretty strict.”

“Tell me about it.” She put that pan down and got another, rotating her towel to try to find a not-wet place. “I guess you know all about that though, huh?”

“Me?” He turned surprised eyes down on her.

However, Sage just shrugged. “Yeah, you and Jayc. I mean, with you guys dating and everything.”

She said it so matter-of-factly that Luke felt like he’d been hit in the chest with a double-barrel shotgun blast.

“Oh, uh.” He reached up and scratched the back of his head, not realizing he’d managed to transfer suds there. “We’re not dating. We’re just friends.”

“Friends.” Sage laughed. “Yeah. Right.”

Defensively and trying to figure out what that laugh meant, he plunged his hands back in the soapy water. “Really. We’re just friends.” Before she could question it or laugh at him again, Luke plowed forward. “Good friends. The best. But we’re totally not dating.”

“Huh.” She made the sound and nodded with a scowl on her face as she dried a bowl. “But you want to… date her, right?”

If Luke had had any air in his system, he would have yelled Fire to get out of this conversation. “Uh. No. I…”

“Oh, come on. Seriously? Now, no lying over dishes.” Her gaze came up to his face, and he hated that he couldn’t think of a way to get away from her.

Lifting his eyebrows, he let his gaze slide over her face. “No lying over dishes? That’s a new one.”

“No, now, come on. No changing the subject on me. You like Jaycee.”

This was not a conversation he wanted to be in. Suddenly her word from before, surreal pounded through his mind. “As a friend, yes. I like Jaycee.”

Sage shook her head, looking imminently more comfortable than she had 20 minutes before, which did nothing for his nerves. “But you go out?”

“Not like that. Not like you mean. Not like dating.” He shrugged and reached up to push his sleeves up, realizing only after he did so that he had only succeeded in getting them wet. “We go out. We hang out sometimes, but we’re not dating.”

Something approaching sadness brushed her face. “But I see how you look at her.”

That backed Luke up. “Oh, yeah? How do I look at her?” The second the question was out of his mouth, he deeply regretted asking it.

However, instead of getting sarcastic or mischievous, she grew pensive. “Like she’s holding your whole world in her hands, like you would do anything to be with her, like you love her.”

The shotgun blast was beginning to sound merciful. He let his gaze fall to the dish water that was getting greasy instead of soapy.

“I’m right,” Sage said softly. “Aren’t I? You’re in love with Jaycee.”

“I’m going to have to switch out this water,” he said, reaching for the plug. He pulled his sleeve up to his face and rubbed it there, sensing moisture there. No way was he going to ask what was causing it to be there.

Sage continued to dry the pans, and remarkably there were now more on her side than on his. “So why don’t you ask her out?”

His heart was really starting to hurt, and the shake of his head did nothing to stop the pain. “She’s not…” He shrugged and washed the last of the old water down the drain before starting the faucet and filling the sink with new hot water. “It’s not… She’s not into me like that.” This shrug was only mildly easier. “I’ve accepted it.”

Now Sage had grown completely quiet as she continued drying, and Luke wanted to ask what she wasn’t saying. “Well, for what it’s worth, I think she’s missing something… someone pretty cool.”

It was the first chance he’d had to laugh, and Luke took it. “Cool? Me? I’m here washing dishes on a Saturday afternoon.”

She tilted her head and looked up at him. “And that’s a bad thing?”

“Well, it’s not cool, that’s for sure.”

A second and she half-nodded. “Maybe not to everyone.”

Chapter 9

The whole building was spit-shined clean by the time Sage followed Luke out to the front parking lot at four. Sometime after they had finished washing dishes, he had removed the drenched plaid over-shirt leaving only the liquid blue T-shirt underneath. Maybe he wasn’t ready to play on the football team, but the muscles were still obvious enough to make Sage think Jaycee had to be out of her mind to not be falling all over him.

“Safe driving,” Pastor Steve said from the door as they exited.

“You too,” Luke said as he raised his hand in good-bye, and in the next second, they were standing together awkwardly outside the locked door. He looked across the barren parking lot then over to her. “You need a ride?”

Surprise jumped on her, and her gaze jerked itself up to his face. “What? Oh. No. I… No. My dad’s coming.” Feeling like a forgotten wheel, she went over to the edge of the concrete and sat down. “I’m sure he’ll be here any minute.”

She felt him, standing there, towering over her, and after a few seconds, she shielded her eyes from the sun and looked up at him. “You don’t have to wait. I’ll be fine.”

He nodded, stood for one more second and then folded himself down onto the concrete next to her.

“Really,” she said. “I’m sure Dad’s on his way.”

Luke smiled a tight smile at her. “I don’t have anything pressing to get to. No hot date or anything.”

Sage absorbed that blow. He really was hurting over her sister, and she wished with everything in her that she could figure out how to fix that for him… for them. They made such a cute couple. Why couldn’t Jaycee see that? Still, for his sake, Sage decided not to pursue it. It was obvious how much he didn’t want to talk about it. “I’m sure you have better things to be doing than sitting out here babysitting me.”

Luke leaned back on the metal siding, and Sage wondered how it didn’t burn him to cinders. “Babysitting, huh? Nah. It feels good to sit down for a change.” He sent one hand up the other arm’s muscle and rubbed there. “Man, I didn’t think we were ever going to finish all those dishes. Give me spaghetti any day.”

With a small laugh of her own, Sage scooted over by him and after testing the metal, she leaned back as well. The sun pouring down around them felt amazing, and she soaked it in. “I’m thinking I was safer with the tacos.”

He laughed, hardly making a sound.

Neither of them said anything for a long minute, and then she felt him turn his head toward her. Waiting, she breathed until she could take it no longer. Finally she opened her eyes and tilted her head to him. “What?”

His eyes were a melted mix of concern, hope, and doubt.

“What?” she finally asked again because she couldn’t take that look without knowing what it meant.

Another second and he sat up and spun so that he was sitting, legs crossed, knees almost touching her thigh. “Okay. I’m going to ask this, and you can totally say no if you want.”

Worry hit her. Was he going to ask her out? Surely he knew about Rory. “O… kay.”

One more long look and he let out a breath and let his gaze fall to either the concrete or his fingers, she couldn’t tell. “Okay. So the other day, at the garage sale, when you were looking at that little kid’s vest…”

Sage lifted her eyebrows having never seen this exit until they were on it. “Yeah?”

He heaved another breath. “Well, I know this is going to sound like crazy or whatever, but after you left…”

When he didn’t continue, Sage nearly fell off her seat in anticipation. “After I left, what?”

Now he was backing up in his spirit if not physically. “Well, you said that you could… what’d you say? Recycle it?”

More worry crashed into her. “Upcycle?”

“Yeah. Yeah. Upcycle. Fix it. Add that lace stuff to it.”

“Yeah?” She dragged the syllable out to about 15. “What about it?”

“Well.” But he got no more out than that as his gaze went skittering out to the empty parking lot.

After another agonizing, moment he scratched his ear, and Sage reached the end of her patience. “Well, what, Luke? Just tell me. I’m not going to make you wash more dishes for asking something.”

That brought a small laugh out of him, and his gaze came up to hers, still concerned and now filled with vulnerability. “You said you could fix it, upcycle it.” He shrugged and let his gaze fall. “Would you?”

“Would I?” Her eyebrows reached up further. “Would I upcycle it?” The thought pushed her backward. “Well, yeah. I would. I mean, I could if I had gotten it, but…”

“Really? Awesome.” And with that he jumped up and jogged to the far side of the lot to the lone car sitting next to the street. It was black. An old sports car. It wasn’t Hollywood cool, but it was cool enough in an old, don’t have tons of money kind of way.

In a blink he was striding back to her, and now, he was carrying something.

“What’s that?” she asked of the little plastic bag in his hand.

“A project.” He sat back down and handed it to her.

Not understanding, she opened the bag and reached in to draw the items out. The little denim vest and the pink lace. Her gaze came up to his. “Wh…?”

“I know.” He shook his head. “It’s lame, but I really don’t have a present for Alyssa, and I know she’d love this. My sister would probably nominate me for Uncle of the Century or something.”

Lightness and gentleness touched her heart. “You’re serious?”

The nod was slow and only took one trip down and then up. “I am. If you’re interested. I mean, I know you’ve got all this exciting stuff to do and everything.” His smile traipsed its way across her heart as he ducked and scratched his ear. “But like I said, you don’t have to if you don’t want. You can totally say no, and I’ll understand.”

How he could look so much like a boy and a man at the same time, Sage had no accounting for. It would mean braving the stepmother she wolf, but how could she say no to that face? Her head nodded her answer before she said it. “I think I can work my magic on it and see what I can come up with.”

His grin was all the payment she would ever need. “Cool.”

A moment and he looked at his watch. “You sure your dad’s coming?”

Snapped from the nice moment back into reality, Sage dug out her cell phone. It was nearly 4:30, and although Luke had been nice about it, he really didn’t need to be sitting out here babysitting her. “Just a sec. I’ll call them.”

She had said yes to his crazy idea. Luke could ask for no more. As she placed the call, he tried to make himself scarce even though he was sitting less than two feet from her.

“Hi. Yeah. It’s Sage. Is Dad coming to get me?”

The strain that stretched in her soft voice raked right across his heart.

“Oh.” With that word, she tipped away from him, turning slightly. “Um, yeah. I’m still here.”

He heard more tension snap over her, saw it when she lifted her hand and sent her fingers into her hair and wound herself down and around the phone call. With everything in him he wanted her to sound soft and happy like she had earlier.

“I can take you home,” he said, hoping that might help.

She glanced over her shoulder. “No. No, that’s okay. I think… yeah, just a sec.” Turning back to him, her eyes asked the question she didn’t voice.

“I can take you,” he said, shrugging. “It’s no big deal. It’s right on my way.”

With a small breath, she went back to the call. “Yeah, it’s okay. Luke can bring me.” Turning so her back was all the way to him, she arched over the phone. “He’s here. He says he can bring me. It’s no big deal.” It took another agonizing moment before she began to uncoil. “Yeah. Okay. We will. K. Okay. Bye.”

She pulled the phone from her ear, sat there looking at it for a breath, and then like someone had hit play on the DVD, she turned to him with a bright smile on her lips and even somehow in her eyes. “I’m sorry about this. I guess Dad forgot.”

It took only one nod and a bounce for him to be up and off the concrete. “No problem. Really. It’s right on my way.”

He reached down for her hand, and when she looked up at him, all of his fantasies about her paled in comparison to that look. Carefully and with a soft, grateful smile, she put her hand in his and let him help her up. Once on her feet, she let his hand go to swipe at her jeans.

“Oh, wow. I’m such a mess. I feel like I’ve been dragged through a mud puddle.”

However, one look at her, his answer was easy. “I think you look amazing.”

Her smile was slow and vulnerable. “You have to say that or I might not help you with the dishes next time.”

Next time. Luke really liked that idea.

At the car, he opened her door, and it was easy to see Luke was a gentleman even when romance was out of the question.

“Thank you,” Sage said, sliding into the passenger seat.

“Absolutely.” He shut her door and strode around to get in on his side. As he did, she took inventory of the car. Not flashy. Definitely older. But clean and in its own way cool.

She felt bad about him having to drive, humiliated was probably closer. How could her father forget about her like that? Was she so easily overlooked? She tried not to think about it, but her heart was thinking of little else. In the bottom of her spirit, she felt the tears bubbling up, but she wouldn’t let them fall. Not here. Not now. Not like this, with him sitting right next to her.

As he pulled onto the street with no traffic at all, Luke glanced over at her. “You okay?”

“What?” she asked, looking at him before she thought better of it. Quickly, defensively, she waved the question away. “Oh, yeah. Of course. I’m sure it was just a schedule mix-up.”

However, Luke didn’t look all that convinced. “Well, then tell whoever mixed up the schedules thanks.”

Concerned questioning went through her, but before she could ask, he smiled over at her.

“Good excuse to pay you back for helping me do all those dishes.”

That brought out a real smile, and she was thankful for it and for him. “I don’t know how you do it. My hands would be prunicated if I had done all those pans.”

He laughed at that. “Prunicated, huh?”

“Prune-like, becoming like prunes, resembling prunes.”

This glance was full of distrustful confusion. “You made that up.”

Sage sat up straighter, knowing she had in fact made it up, but her bluff had always been safe with her grandmother playing Scrabble. “I did not. You can look it up.”

“Maybe I will.” His eyes were filled with admiration. Then it fell into thoughtfulness. “You know you’re different than I thought you’d be.”

Worried skepticism puckered her face. “Different?”

“Yeah.” He stretched his legs out as if getting comfortable in the seat.

“Is that a bad thing?” She was a little afraid to hear the answer to that question.

“Nah.”

“Okay, then tell me how I’m different than you thought.”

This glance held her a second longer than the other had, which pulled warmth into her cheeks, and she fidgeted, wishing she wasn’t such a mess.

“Well, you’re funny for one. You always have a comeback.”

“I’m just trying to keep up.”

He lifted his chin. “And you’re really nice.”

“Ah, yes. My reputation has preceded me as usual.”

“No.” And now he grew even more quietly thoughtful. “I mean it’s more than that. You notice things, and you really seem to care.”

“I seem to?” She wasn’t sure that was a compliment.

“I just… I thought you would be like all snooty and arrogant, but you’re really not.”

“Gee thanks.” Although she meant it with a measure of sarcasm, he didn’t seem to take it that way.

“No. I just mean… I think I misjudged you, and I’m sorry about that.”

Softness brushed her heart as she pushed the hair back from her face. “Maybe the feeling is mutual.”

When he pulled into her driveway and parked, it took little to notice the three vehicles parked there. Not only had her father forgotten her, but clearly, none of them had thought to remind him. Sitting there, the obvious staring back at them, Sage really, truly hoped that Luke couldn’t count to three.

“Well,” she said, wanting to get out and run before he put all those pieces together. “Thanks for bringing me.”

“Thanks for the help.” Then he jumped. “Oh!” He dug into his pocket and pulled out his phone. “Can I get your number, so I can find out if you get the vest done?”

“Oh, sure.” Quickly she dug for her own. “And I should get yours so I can call you when I get it finished.”

He grinned, and her heart flipped over. “Absolutely.”

When she left him in the car, the little bag now in her hands, Sage had the sensation that he was watching her. It was confirmed when she got to the door, turned, and waved. He waved back, once. Almost like a salute but not touching his forehead. Her heart hadn’t felt so light in a million years, and on that breath she breezed into the house.

“Yeah. No. Oh, okay. Yeah. She just got here. Okay.” It was Mrs. Lawrence, and she was on the phone.

Sage did her best to continue to be invisible as she skirted her way through the kitchen; however, she wasn’t quite invisible enough.

“I will. Thank you, Pastor Steve. Okay. Good-bye.” The beep signaled the end of that conversation. “The meal went long, huh?”

Just like that, Sage stopped in her tracks. “Uh, yeah. We didn’t get finished until like four.”

Her stepmother nodded and then banged the edge of the pan with the spoon, causing Sage to jump. “That was Pastor Steve. He was very appreciative of all your help today, said they couldn’t have done it without you.”

“Oh.” That same lightness drifted through her. “He’s very sweet.”

The glance was dismissive and not particularly happy. “I’m sorry about your dad. With this Charles account and everything, he just forgot…”

“It’s okay.” This one was harder to wave away. She hiked her shoulders. “Luke didn’t mind.”

Another once-over, and Sage was starting to wish she really could disappear. “Well, I’m going to go take a quick shower. I’m kind of a mess.”

The raise of her stepmother’s eyebrows told her she agreed with the assessment, and Sage spun on her toe to go. However, at the last second she remembered and turned back. “Oh. Um.” Only the little bag in her hand gave her the courage as the memory of him sitting on that concrete heated through her being. “Luke was wondering… I mean, we got to talking, and his niece is about to have a birthday.”

Now her stepmother was looking at her with open concern.

“He asked… well, I mentioned that I used to do some upcycling. You know, taking old pieces and adding things to them to make them better than they were.” She held up the bag. “He was wondering if I could upcycle this little vest for him, for his niece.”

Clearly her stepmother didn’t see how this involved her.

“Um, but to do that, I’m going to need a sewing machine. So I was wondering if…” Her courage began to seep away from her as if there was a small hole in the bottom of it with no way to get it plugged. “Would you… mind if I used yours? I mean, I’ve sewn before. I have my own machine at home, but I obviously can’t go there to use it.”

Why did it seem like asking for the keys to Fort Knox? A moment and another, and then her stepmother wound her arms over themselves at her chest. She scrutinized Sage once more. “I suppose that will be all right, but it’s in that closet. Don’t make a huge mess getting it out.”

“Oh, okay. I’ll be really careful. I promise.” Against what should have been her better judgment, Sage bounced a little and squealed. “Okay, then I’m going to shower and get started on this. Thanks.”

She thought she heard you’re welcome as she left, but it was so faint, she couldn’t be totally sure.

Luke sat down at his desk and stared for a minute at his cell phone. He had her number. Maybe it didn’t mean anything to anyone else, but to him, he felt like shouting it to the world. Thinking back over their day together, he stumbled on one thought and reached for his dictionary.

First he looked up prune and then read the words before and after it. Checking once more just to make sure, he picked up his phone and typed.

No lying over dishes, Hollywood… prunicated is NOT a word!

When he hit SEND, he couldn’t stop the smile. She was different than he had imagined, and that was a very, very good thing.

Chapter 10

The shower felt good. The clean clothes felt even better. Dressed in white shorts and a soft, flowing barely pink top with spaghetti straps and knitting at the top, Sage set about getting the sewing machine untangled from its current resting place. First to come out of the closet was a sack of fabric that was really tiny pieces that might only be used on some quilt some day because they weren’t big enough to be used for much else.

A small box of thread and notions followed. She set that on her bed, hoping there would be some thread that matched or at least complimented her imagined creation. Crazy how at one time she had enjoyed this outlet so much and how it had somehow gotten lost in the busyness of her life.

Finally she reached the sewing machine and carefully pulled it free. It was older than hers but looked roughly similar. Yes. This would be perfect for her project. Luke’s project. She smiled at that. It would be nice to do something for him after he had been so nice to her. Safe.

Funny how when she thought of him, that word kept coming back to her. Just as she was dragging the card table out from its hiding place to the side of the closet, she heard her cell phone chime. Abandoning the task, she hopped over to the desk and retrieved it, realizing there was a message in the text. However, the call took precedence. She answered it. “Hello?”

“’Bout time you answer that thing. Where have you been?”

The onslaught was so abrupt that Sage shook her head to fend it off. “Been?”

“I’ve called like three times in the last fifteen minutes.”

Finally her sanity kicked back in. Rory. “Oh, I’m sorry. I was taking a shower. I guess I didn’t check my phone when I got out.”

“Well,” he said, not sounding particularly happy, “I was wondering if you wanted to go with me. I just got invited to this party over in Greely. My cousin’s best friend’s something or other. Anyway, if you’re gonna go, I need to be picking you up in like 15.”

In panic, Sage looked down at herself. “Minutes?”

“Yes minutes.”

Fifteen minutes. Fifteen minutes. Who could get ready for a party in 15 minutes? “Uh, well, I have to ask. I can’t just leave.”

Rory sighed as if she was killing the mood or his desire to even spend the energy on her. “Well, can you hurry it up? I need to know what I’m doing.”

“Uh, yeah. Sure. Uh. Just a minute.” When she pulled the phone from her ear, Sage debated about just shutting it off. However, he sounded angry enough with her as it was, she didn’t want to do anything to make him really mad. Gently she set the phone on the desk and went out to the kitchen.

There she found both her father and her stepmother. They were talking about stocks or some portfolio something. Dragging her courage to her, she breached the little opening from the dimness of the hallway into the kitchen light. “Uh,” she said by way of hoping to snag their attention. “Hm.”

They both looked her direction, and their conversation slammed to a stop.

She laughed softly at how quaking her insides felt. “Um, Rory is on the phone.” Nodding back to her room, she put her hands behind her back. “He wants to know if I can go to a party with him tonight.”

Her father looked to her stepmother, and she knew she’d better do some fast talking before they torpedoed the idea.

“It’s at his cousin’s place. Kind of a family thing, I think. He needs to know like now because he’s leaving in a few minutes.”

Another silent conversation passed between them.

Finally, her stepmother leaned against the counter and folded her arms. “And this is just coming up now?”

How to answer that? Sage shrugged. “He just called. I didn’t know anything about it until a few minutes ago.”

“I don’t know,” her stepmom said. “Greely? That’s not exactly close.”

“But I haven’t gotten to see him all week, and you said I was ungrounded today. Please!” She so hated whining, but it seemed inevitable in this quasi-parental situation.

A moment and her stepmother wavered, shook her head, and went back to her cooking.

“Okay,” her father said, “but curfew is midnight. No exceptions.”

Sage nodded. “No exceptions. Got it.” She raced back and grabbed up the phone. “I can be ready in ten minutes.”

“Make it eight. I’m nearly to your place.”

With that, he hung up, and Sage squealed, some out of excitement, some out of panic. Eight minutes. Eight minutes. She ran to her luggage, realizing that at this rate she might as well unpack it. She wasn’t going anywhere any time soon anyway. However, that would have to wait. Yanking out her white capris, she switched out her pants and decided the top would have to do.

Make-up! Oh, and shoes!

Her body was going six directions at once as she waved her magic wand and got herself together. In fact, by the time Rory honked out front, all she had to do was grab up the cell phone and run. Some things were worth hurrying for.

Luke considered calling her but decided not to. He didn’t want to push his luck, and he figured the text was already doing that. So after a little X-Box and supper, he grabbed the summer reading book de jour, figuring now was as good a time as any to get started on it.

Hopping into Rory’s truck was always something of a trick, and the fact that he didn’t move from the driver’s seat to help her in didn’t make it any easier. Still, it was nice to be sprung from solitary, and spending some time with a handsome guy couldn’t be all bad.

“’Bout time.” He gave her a once-over that didn’t look overly pleased.

Sage’s confidence plummeted as she looked down at herself. “Sorry. You kind of caught me off-guard.”

Rory shook his head and spun the wheel to exit the driveway. “It’s Saturday night. What? Did you think we wouldn’t have plans?”

Well, it would’ve been nice to know we had plans before ten minutes ago. “I don’t know. I guess I hadn’t really thought about it.”

“Yeah, well, whatever. You’re here. I’m here. Let’s make the best of it.”

Wow. That sounded so incredibly romantic. Then again, she hadn’t returned his calls, and she hadn’t even thought to contact him today. This probably was more her fault than his. Thinking she should check her cell in case someone else had called, she pulled it out and slid her finger around for the passcode. In seconds the welcome screen came up.

Rory.

Rory.

Rory.

And then her heart snagged. She opened the message and very nearly laughed out loud. Hollywood. She so liked it when he called her that. Quickly, she turned the phone and typed her reply. At least she wasn’t failing in every single relationship she had at the moment. Sliding the bells to vibrate, she put the thing back in her pocket. “So how far is Greely?”

The earth nearly spun out from underneath him when his phone buzzed. Luke grabbed for it, realizing after he did so that it was probably nothing that earth-shatteringly important. He swiped it on and had to force himself to breathe as he read the message, her message.

Maybe not in YOUR dictionary. Doesn’t mean I can’t be creative!

Creative? He’d give her creative.

In her pocket the phone buzzed, but in the past ten minutes Sage had realized that Rory’s anger was not a passing thing. It was clear she had some making up to do, and texting some other guy probably wasn’t going to help in that department.

“So what’ve you been up to all day?” She slid across the seat and buckled her belt right next to him.

Rory looked down at her as if he wasn’t sure why she had done that. “Helping out with my grandpa’s farm.”

“Oh, throwing hay?” Flirting came easy even when it was less than the thing she wanted to be doing. Carefully she wound her hands up and through his arm. “You must be good at that.”

A moment and he grinned at her. “You’ll have to come watch me sometime.”

“I’ll have to.”

After an hour of checking the phone every five minutes, Luke had to admit to himself that she wasn’t going to text back. Why he felt like such a failure over that, he wasn’t sure. It wasn’t like she was really into him. Jaycee Lawrence Part Deux. Why was he surprised?

Then he thought about that name and the fact that he was an absolutely horrible friend washed over him. Sliding up so he was sitting with his back against the headboard, he dialed the number and listened to it ring. Once. Twice.

“Uh, hello?” She sounded sleepy or actually asleep.

“Hey, Jayc? How’re you doing?”

“Ugh. What time is it?”

He glanced at the clock. “About 9:30. How’re you feeling? They said you were sick.”

“Ugh. That’s one word for it. I think I died and they just haven’t found my body yet.”

Worry and disappointment with himself drifted through him. “I should let you go, let you get some rest.”

“K. But if I’m not better by morning, have them send someone in to make sure I haven’t really died.”

“I will. Get some rest.”

“K. ‘Bye.” And she hung up.

Luke put the phone between his knees and his head back. Yes, he was going to get the crown for worst friend ever. “Lord, please be with Jaycee. Help her get better. Amen.”

Okay, it wasn’t a family party. That much Sage figured out the moment they drove up to the old farmhouse. There were cars and pickups parked in every direction on the long driveway, and not an adult to be seen. As they got out of the pickup and headed to the house, she was horrified to realize there were couples making out in nearly every vehicle they passed. Maybe she shouldn’t have been so eager to come here with him.

Defensively because her instinct questioned her safety, she slid closer to him, which he apparently liked. He put his arm around her and grinned down at her, and nothing in her liked that smile.

“Come on. This is going to be fun.”

The book was boring. Sage hadn’t texted back, and calling Jaycee was out too. Luke slid off the bed, hating living out in the middle of nowhere. A trip to fun would take at least an hour one-way and at nearly 10:30, he wouldn’t even make it there and back much less do anything fun in between.

In the kitchen, he grabbed a Dr. Pepper, sure his mother would have a fit if she caught him. On quiet sock feet, he went through the mudroom and out the back door where he sat down on the porch, just him, the Dr. Pepper and the night. A drink and he looked far, far out, as far as his gaze could stretch across the fields.

It was that hazy gray time of night when the glowing beige moon had just started its trek into the night sky beyond. He sighed and took another drink. “You know, God, it sure would be nice if You gave me some direction here. I’m not asking to be driven like Jayc, but a few clues might be helpful. I just feel like I’m drifting, like I could get to the end of my story and not have anything real to show for it.”

Shaking his head, he took another drink. “Is it like this for everybody? Does everybody feel like they have no idea what to do with their lives?”

He thought about other kids in his class, and some of them, he was pretty sure felt like he did. Others were on the warpath to their dreams. What separated one from the other? What was the difference?

All he knew was he would get up in the morning and go to church because he was supposed to. Did he want to? Good question. He couldn’t imagine being anywhere else, and he would never think of not going without a really good reason. However, did he really want to, or was he just doing it because that’s what was expected of him? He didn’t have an answer for that, and as he crushed the can and stood to go back inside, he wasn’t sure he ever would.

“Ror! You made it, dude.” The skinny young guy with the bottle of beer in hand called to them through the crowd and then approached. Upon getting to them, he put his fist in the air for Rory to bump, and then his gaze fell to Sage. “And who is this pretty little thing?”

Rory put his arm around her and grinned. “Hey, Evan, this is my girlfriend, Sage Wentworth. She’s here this summer from Hollywood.”

The way he said that word had her skin crawling, but she smiled at Evan, knowing anything less wouldn’t be acceptable.

“Well, Sage from Hollywood, it’s nice of you to join us.” Evan was trying, but suave just wasn’t working very well. “The drinks are in the kitchen. Help yourself.”

“Ev!” someone called from the other side of the room, and Evan detached himself from their company.

“Let’s go get something,” Rory said, and Sage had the awful feeling that kids here weren’t any saner than those in California.

This book was going to kill him. It would be nice if he could figure out who was actually narrating the story, but so far, 50 pages in, Luke was as lost as when he had started. Finally giving up, he put the book on the desk, checked his phone, and decided some early sleep wouldn’t kill him. Again, he wished he lived closer to the action. In a year, he told himself. In a year everything would be different.

At 11:15 Sage was beginning to panic more than a little. It had taken a good 40 minutes to get here, and they needed to be heading out. However, she had personally witnessed the five beers Rory had already knocked back, and her options for getting home were dwindling quickly.

Moreover, she had been called a pretty little thing so many times, she was starting to get a real headache from the leering eyes. She wished again she hadn’t come, but she was here now, and now she had to figure out how not to be. Excusing herself to the restroom and out from under Rory’s ever-heavier arm, she made her escape, and once on the other side of the locked door went through her options. There weren’t many.

Hoping that maybe if she took her phone out she would get the courage to call her parents, she pulled it from her pocket and slipped her finger around it. The message on top made her heart grab. Luke.

I didn’t realize your name was Webster. Webster Hollywood. You’re right! That is creative!

Although Sage wanted to laugh at the text, she didn’t have time. It wasn’t a great option, but it was better than the others.

Luke. Are you still there? SEND

The sound very easily could have come from his dreams, and at first, Luke was pretty sure that it had. However, the glowing of the phone screen on the ceiling of his room said otherwise. Surprised, he sat up, rubbed his eyes, wondering how long he’d been asleep even as he grabbed for the thing.

With one breath and a glance at the words, his heart snagged. Worry, pure and unadulterated, splashed into him at the message. Quickly he typed back, Yeah. I’m here. What’s up?

He hit send realizing she was probably going to tell him they hadn’t gotten enough lace or something. How much lace does one need for a small jacket anyway? It was a question he had never really contemplated.

Sage’s fingers flew over the keys, and she hit SEND, praying he would know what to do.

Help. I’m in Greely with Rory, and he’s been drinking. I’ve got to get home by midnight or I’ll be grounded for life!

With that, the lace was forgotten. Luke swung out of bed, his feet hitting the floor as his brain spun into gear.

Her phone jingled.

Can you drive?

Panic flooded his being as he waited the ten seconds.

He has the keys.

Realizing this was going to take too long to do as texts, Luke hit Contact and Call. If he could go get her himself, he would, but that was out of the question. She probably didn’t know how to get him there anyway.

When her phone rang, Sage nearly dropped the thing. Then she saw the call log and breathed a sigh of relief. “Hello?”

“Sage?”

“Yeah.” With that her whole body simultaneously relaxed and went into meltdown mode. “Luke? What am I going to do?”

“Where are you?”

She looked around, wondering if she should tell him. “In the bathroom at some guy’s house.”

“Where’s Rory?”

“Outside somewhere.”

“He’s been drinking?”

“Yeah, and they’re smoking something too. I don’t know what it is though.”

Luke let out a hard breath. “Can you talk him into giving you his keys?”

“His keys?” Her eyes went wide. “To his truck?”

“I would totally come get you, but I don’t know where you are, and I couldn’t get you home in time even if I did.”

Sage wasn’t a huge fan of this plan, but if it was her best option, she was going to have to take it. “I think I can get them.”

“Okay. Then do it. You drive. If he won’t let you, call me back.”

“K.” The syllable was shaky and weak.

“And Sage?”

“Yeah?”

“I’ll be praying for you.”

“Thanks.” When she hung up, she was pretty sure she was going to need every prayer he could offer.

“Dear Lord,” Luke breathed into the darkness, and somehow this prayer didn’t feel ambling or meandering at all. It felt deathly serious. “Please give Sage the courage to get those keys. Keep her safe. Please, dear God, help her…”

“Hey,” Sage said, doing her best sweet, loving girlfriend act. She slid herself under Rory’s arm and put her arms around him. The stench on him was horrible, but she willed herself not to notice it. “I guess we’re going to have to be going.”

His smile disintegrated. “Going?”

“You know, home.”

He backed up even further from her. “Home? We just got here.”

It was harder than impossible, but she smiled at him with even more syrup. “I turn into a pumpkin if I’m out past midnight. You know that.” She let her eyes fall almost closed, flirting like she never had in her life.

“Wouldn’t want that,” the guy Rory was talking to said, tipping his beer toward her.

Miss America couldn’t have smiled brighter.

After a moment Rory sighed dramatically. “I guess.”

One hurdle down. One to go.

“Please, God. Please. Get her out of there. Please help her.” Luke was sitting on the edge of his bed feeling more helpless than he ever had in his life. He wanted to call her, to find out if she had gotten the keys, but he didn’t dare. If Rory found out she was talking with him, there was no telling what he would do.

The guy was an apple short of a bushel the way it was. Making him mad with her at his mercy was not a good idea. “Please, dear Lord. Please.”

Sounds of the make-out sessions in progress followed them every stumbling step out to the pickup. Luke was right, Sage decided. She had to get those keys.

“You know,” she said, hating that sweet sound in her voice but knowing it was her best bet. “I’d hate for you to get into trouble over having a little fun.”

Rory’s foot betrayed him, and she barely kept him upright. “We could have some more fun.” He angled his mouth down near her neck, and the stench about took her knees from under her.

“That’s gonna have to wait until next time.”

They were at the pickup now, and it loomed in the night above them.

He pulled the keys out and fumbled with them to get the fob to work. Instead of hitting the unlock button, he managed to hit the little red panic one and the pickup came alive.

The sound reverberated around them, and Sage lunged for the keys to turn the thing off.

When it stopped, she heard someone in one of the vehicles hurl obscenities at them, but at the moment, that wasn’t really the most pressing problem. “Tell you what, why don’t I drive?”

“You?” Rory swayed, and Sage vowed she was not getting in that vehicle with him behind the wheel. “You can’t drive this thing.”

She saw her opening, and she took it. Running her hands up his chest, she pushed him next to the pickup. “Oh, you’d be surprised what I can do.” With a push, she leaned toward him and kissed him, hard and wanting.

That seemed to knock him out of the protests into another realm entirely.

“What?” she asked, letting her voice fall into seductive. “You don’t trust me with big, hulking machines?” The act was all she could feel as she ran her hands down his arms and back up again. His objection to the plan was weakening by the second. “I’m pretty good at it, you know?”

“Oh, I can imagine.” And he came back at her, wrapping her in a tight grip as he planted a slathering kiss all over her face.

She let him think he was going to get somewhere for a moment and then pushed him back. “You bad boy. You’d better play nice, or you won’t get anything.”

His eyes in the moonlight, dim, desirous and hopeful took her all in. “I can be good, and I can be bad.”

“Then you’ll let me drive.”

A second and he nodded. “If you think you have what it takes.”

“Oh, Lord, please.” Luke hadn’t quit pacing since he couldn’t stay seated any longer. He grabbed up his phone again and checked it in case he hadn’t heard it. He hadn’t.

Collapsing onto the bed in a heap, he closed his eyes and prayed like he never had before.

Sage could hardly breathe for the fear racing through her veins. Some was the truck. Some was Rory, still pawing at her. Some was that she had no idea how to get back to the main road.

“Hey,” she said, elbowing him away from her body. “Is it right or left at this turn?”

“Uh.” Rory looked out the windshield and swayed again. “Left.”

She had no other option than to go with left. “Oh, God,” she whispered in her spirit as she fought the tears, “please help me.”

At 11:45 Luke seriously considered getting in his car and going over to her house. Maybe he could alert her parents to the situation. Maybe they could call her. Maybe he should have done that right away. He didn’t know. The last thing he wanted to do was to get her into more trouble, and it was possible that she would get home and they would never know the difference.

It was also possible that she wouldn’t get home at all. Tears burned his eyes at that thought. “Dear Lord, please…”

With every minute that passed, Sage prayed harder. The pawing had thankfully decreased, owing mostly to the fact that Rory started nodding off halfway home. Some things in life were more mercy than one deserved. That was one of them.

At 11:52, they went through the little town, and Sage was grateful for the trek from the hall home that afternoon. For the first time she had paid some attention to the turns, and working in her mind she tried to figure out just how long that drive had lasted. Five minutes? Eight? Could they make it by midnight?

Then her mind really went into overdrive. What if their clocks were just enough off to make the whole question moot? What if, after all of this, she still made it home a minute or two late? Her heart thumped hard in her chest as her prayers slid through the tears she didn’t dare let herself shed. This whole night had been a nightmare. Her life was a nightmare. Yes, that was it. She was physically, literally, living in the middle of a nightmare she sensed at the moment she might never wake up from.

Finally, blessedly the last turn came into view, and her prayers shifted even further into overdrive. “Just get me home. Please. Just get me home.”

The hulking truck made it into the driveway, and Sage’s first sensation was that the lights were on in the kitchen. They were waiting. She knew it.

Her gaze tripped to the little green numbers on the dash. 11:58.

Truly not caring about anything other than getting in that house, she put the pickup in park. “Rory. We’re here.”

“Here?” He picked himself off the back of the seat.

“I’ve got to go.” Suddenly that he was going to drive now knocked into her consciousness. “You could sleep it off out here.” Frantically, she looked back at that kitchen light. I have to get in there!  “Why don’t you? Just crash out here. Couple hours. You’d be okay to drive then.” She opened the door and slid out even as she talked.

“Nah. I’d better get on home.”

Serious terror ripped her both directions. “Are you sure?”

“Yeah. No worries. I’ve done it before.” He slid over into the driver’s seat. “I’ll see you soon?”

She was on the ground, looking up at him. “Yeah, soon.”

With a nod but no wave, he slammed the door closed between them, and knowing she should stop him, she backed up. A moment and she closed her eyes to the tears assaulting her. How could she let him drive away? She knew better, but what could she do—jump in front of the truck and stop him? Suddenly 11:58 flashed through her mind, and she squeaked out the concern jumping through her spirit. Turning she fled into the house as the pickup turned at the corner and headed off into the darkness.

The clock on his desk glowed 12:00 as the colon in the middle kept blinking the seconds away. Luke wondered as he watched it, counted, and prayed if he would hear from her tonight. Or ever again flitted through his mind.

No! He wouldn’t think like that. He wouldn’t. He was going to believe she had gotten home safely, and everything was all right. Because if she hadn’t and it wasn’t, he would never forgive himself.

The second her foot hit the kitchen threshold, Sage pulled up short from her headlong dash into oblivion. Sure enough. They were both there. Waiting.

Her father looked at her, shook his head, and dropped his gaze. Sage just stood there, knowing the end was near.

The moment slid into the next, and then Mrs. Lawrence stepped from her leaning post on the cabinet and came toward Sage. Only verifying that her stepmother had no knife in hand kept her feet planted there.

“I… made it,” Sage said and added a soft, hopeful laugh.

“That you did.” Her stepmother came right up to her, stood for a second, and then leaned in and sniffed. “Fun party?”

“Heh. Heh.” The laugh was decidedly less hopeful. “Yeah. It was all right.”

Spinning on her toe, her stepmother walked away from her, and even from behind her, Sage could hear the silent conversation that passed between them.

“We called Rory’s parents,” her father said. “There was no ‘family party.’”

Panic and tears seeped over her. “He said it was his cousin. I didn’t know until we got there. I swear I didn’t.”

This nod from her father dragged his gaze off of her again. “Sage, we’ve made it very clear that there are rules in this house.”

Her arms flailed out. “But I didn’t know!  I didn’t!”

When her stepmother swiveled, she knew the jig was up. “Have you been drinking?”

Horror swept through her. “No!” The revulsion reached up and grabbed her throat. “No. I wasn’t drinking. I wasn’t.”

“Was anyone else drinking?” And now her stepmother unfurled her arms like a prosecutor.

“Anyone… else?”

“At the party, Sage. Was anyone else drinking at the party?”

Physically, she felt the color drain from her face. They knew. She knew they knew. “I didn’t…”

“Was Rory drinking?” Her father’s question sounded like it was strangling him to get out.

“I…” But she couldn’t answer that one truthfully either.

At that and with a hard shake of his head, her father stood and walked out of the room.

Tears sprang into her eyes, and she mashed them back with her mouth. “I didn’t know. I promise. I didn’t.”

One, small nod and her stepmother came back to where she stood. “Two weeks.” She put her hand out. “We’ll start with that, and see if your father’s calmed down by then.”

“Two… but I didn’t do anything!  I didn’t know!”

“If you think I’m going to let you come in here and ruin this family’s reputation, you have another think coming.” Her hand was out between them. “The phone, Sage. Now!”

Sage jumped a foot at the short burst of anger, and sheer terror gripped her. She hadn’t done anything. She hadn’t. And now she was being punished anyway. Not knowing what else to do, she pulled the phone out of her pocket and placed it into the hand.

“Don’t plan on going anywhere for the next two weeks. Church and home, and that is it. Got it?”

“Yes, Ma’am.”

“And figure on doing the vacuuming and the dishes as well.”

Deeper and deeper the cut went as helplessness drained into it. “Yes, Ma’am.”

“Now go to your room.” Her stepmother pointed the phone that direction.

“Yes, Ma’am.” Without another protest, she headed that direction.

When she was at the door, her stepmother said, “And take a shower. You stink.”

And with that the tears overwhelmed her and Sage fled.

“Please, Lord. Please. Please let her be all right.” Luke’s prayers continued unabated into the darkness of the night. “Please…”

Chapter 11

Every movement the next morning was like running through molasses. Sage dragged her body from the bed by sheer willpower alone. After being paroled for 24-hours, going back into solitary might in fact kill her.

Sunday morning and life could get no worse.

No. No. She pushed that thought out of her mind as she sat in the little desk chair by the mirror and stared at her reflection. Life could get worse. It just had.

She picked the brush up and pulled it through the hair she hadn’t even bothered to brush out after the shower she barely felt. Numb. It was better than feeling anything. At least it was better than feeling whatever was beneath it, and truthfully, she didn’t even want to find out what that might be.

Tired hit her again, and she stood, went over to the bed, and dropped onto it, grabbing the pillow on her decent. No phone, these four walls, and dishes and chores for the next two weeks. She wondered because her brain did without her if this was how Cinderella had felt. A wicked stepmother, a cruel stepsister. Yep. She had all the elements, save for the handsome prince.

I’ve done it before…

Sage sighed as memories started to replay themselves in her mind. With everything in her, she wished she could forget them all, but somehow she knew she never would. They kept winding right back to that look in her father’s eyes when he got up and walked out. She had disappointed him, again. She was good at that. Maybe better than at anything else in her life.

Through the tears, she caught sight of the sewing machine sitting on the floor, and her heart jerked painfully. No. She wasn’t good at anything, and nobody in the whole world even cared about her. And with that thought, she gave in and let the tears take her down into their waiting arms.

Luke dressed at the speed of lightning. Church didn’t start until 9, but he was going to be there early if he had to fly. He jerked the gray tie one way and then the other. “Please, God… Please… I know I’m being a pain here, but please, let her be all right.”

The Sunday knock sounded on her door.

“I’m here,” Sage called, wishing she was anywhere else.

“One hour,” her stepmother said.

“I’ll be ready.”

Wanting with everything in her to blend in, Sage dressed in her black slacks and black overlaid knit top with the blushing pink satin underneath it. The less anyone noticed her today, the better. Quietly, methodically, she brushed her hair and swept it up. Pinning it three times into the bun, she nodded. She wouldn’t let them see they had crushed her.

She wouldn’t. She couldn’t. If she did, they would have won, and she wasn’t going to let that happen even though if she was really, really honest, she would have had to admit they already had.

Standing at the top of the church steps, Luke was in full-out welcoming mode when the first Lawrence member stepped in through the outside doors. The sight swept his breath from him. If Mr. Lawrence was here, then everything had to be okay. Right?

Mrs. Lawrence came in next on the hold of her husband, followed by the three... yes, there were three, he counted them twice, children, and finally, Luke was breathing again.

How she would ever withstand the askew glances, Sage had no way of knowing. Each one was another cut, another slash to the last shreds of self-respect she had managed to maintain in her time here. There were smiles, soft ones, sly ones. They came with the glances, and she willed herself to keep breathing through them.

Ahead of her, her parents greeted the other church-goers as if everything in their whole life was and always had been perfect. Perfect. She hated that word more than she ever had. It was an illusion, an act put on for the rest of the world that somehow you got trapped in and could not escape from. It was like being on the other side of the mirror, beholden to the real person on the other side for your very existence. Knowing that. Sensing it. But being wholly unable to change it.

The pastor’s wife stepped up and said a few words to them, and Sage’s heart fell knowing what even Mrs. Mitchell must think of her by now. If the stories traveled as fast as they clearly did here, everyone knew what she was by now. Putting her gaze only on the tiles, she willed her entire existence to cease. It would be so, so much easier if it would just end right here.

She heard her name and looked up with what she prayed was a bright and beautiful smile, but even that hurt. The second the attention swung from her, she let her gaze fall again. Just get through this and get home. Even that will be better than this.

Somehow Luke had thought seeing her would make him feel better, but better fled out the door and ran away screaming about the time his heart registered just how crushed she looked. It wasn’t anything outright. In fact, from the outside she looked as Hollywood gorgeous as she always did. The black set off the curves, the upsweep of the hair and the red lipstick. Perfection personified. And yet her chin dipped and her eyes did too.

When the family came to the steps, he could hardly hold the emotions back as he opened the door for them to enter.

“Thank you.” Mr. Lawrence shook his hand as the family crossed in front of him.

“You’re welcome, Sir,” Luke said, and for a split second, his gaze locked on hers as she brushed past him.

A tight smile that was laced with a feathering of tears met his eyes and held. Then it crumpled, and she ripped her gaze from his and followed her family inside.

Luke watched them, his heart slashing into ever-tinier pieces with every step she took down that aisle. In the pew she sat, back straight, head up, and he felt the crashing pain of her heartache from where he stood. Yes, she had survived last night, but he wasn’t sure she would ever be the same.

After church, Luke knew he had to find out what had happened. Not knowing might kill him. In fact, every time his gaze had chanced over there to her during the service, his heart panged so hard it left him breathless. He went through the questions he wanted to ask her as if he didn’t have them memorized already. Had she driven home? Had Rory hurt her? Was she grounded forever? WHAT HAPPENED? His mind screamed those two words again and again until he thought he would be dizzy from their relentless march.

As soon as the service ended, he made sure to give the bulletins to Trey, and from the edge of the back, he watched her walk out. Now. It was go time.

“I need to say hello to Mary Atwater,” Sage’s stepmom said as they took the brick steps down from the church’s interior entrance. “I saw her in the service. I didn’t know they were back in town.”

At the bottom of the steps, the family around her scattered, and putting her hand up to her other forearm, Sage drifted off into the corner. Those brochures at the little desk seemed incredibly interesting all of a sudden.

Luke came out of the church like a whirlwind gone mad, and he only barely caught himself from running over one of the older ladies of the church on the top step.

“Oh, excuse me,” he said and then realized he couldn’t just rush past her. “Would you like some help?”

“Oh, that would be lovely, dear.” She took the elbow he offered and leaned on him heavily as they went down the stairs. “You are such a gentleman. I know your grandmother is so proud of you. She speaks about you at bridge all the time.”

He smiled, kind of. “That’s nice. Careful on this last step.”

Together they made it down them, and he straightened to take his arm back.

“You’re a senior this year, aren’t you?” the lady asked, and Luke almost broke his neck trying to get it to swivel in two directions at once.

“Yes, Ma’am. I am. I will be.”

“Yes, that’s what your grandmother said. Said you help out the less fortunate on the weekends too. That’s so wonderful.”

Jaycee was one way. Sage was in the depths of the shadows in the other corner, her back to him. Luke was torn. He couldn’t go to Sage. Jaycee would never let him live that down, but if he went to Jaycee, he might not get the chance to talk with Sage and make sure she was all right.

“Well, I won’t monopolize any more of your time,” the lady said. “God bless you.”

“Uh, you too.” He put his hand on her arm and forced his focus down onto her. One smile and he managed to get away from her. Heads or tails. His heart flipped the coin and headed him in the direction of Jaycee.

She glanced up as he approached, and he fought with every breath in him not to glance at her sister across the way.

“Well, aren’t you a sight for sore eyes,” he said, straining for normal. “So you weren’t dead after all.”

Jaycee stepped into his arms, and Luke had to mash down the feeling of how well they fit together. “Nope. Not actually dead. Just felt like it.” She hugged him, and he really was glad she had lived through it. The hug broke, and he looked down at her. Still Jaycee, a little wan maybe, but she wouldn’t be for long. “Thanks for calling last night. Nice to know you didn’t forget about me.”

“Ah come on now. I could never forget about you.”

In the other corner even the little brochures couldn’t hold Sage’s attention enough not to see the floor show on the opposite side of the lobby. Her gaze flitted over to it and fell, taking her heart along with it. He loved Jaycee, and that was perfectly as it should be. They made sense in a way that she and Luke never would.

It was crazy to even think about him and her getting together. He was all country, and she couldn’t wait to get out of here. Besides, she deserved Rory far more than she would ever deserve a guy like Luke. He was a good guy, stable, solid. No, he was far better off without her. Besides, he had to live here. She would be gone by August. The last thing she wanted to do was ruin his sterling reputation—a reputation he clearly had earned and deserved.

Still, as she turned and put the little brochure about Helping Hands Ministry back into the holder, one part of her wished life could be completely different, that a truly nice guy would fall in love with her and be there to protect her and love her, and look at her like Luke was now looking at Jaycee.

Then again, with her track record and the way her family did love, that was probably a pipe dream of monumental proportions. Yes, some day, if she kept in touch, she might get a wedding invitation from the two of them. She wouldn’t go of course, but she would send them a nice gift. Payback for being there in the middle of the night when the rest of the world was collapsing around her.

“Yeah,” Jaycee said with a laugh, barely ducking enough to keep their conversation between them. “If you want to know the real truth, I think if they could, Mom and Dad would be shipping her back to California on the first plane headed that way if they had a choice.” She shook her head and snickered. “You should have seen them this morning. I have never, in my life, seen Mom that mad, and Dad… psssh. Forget about it. She is toast.”

That landed on top of Luke’s heart like an anvil. “So she’s grounded then?”

“Oh, yeah.” Why did Jaycee have to look so incredibly pleased about that? “Two weeks. No phone. No nothing, and she has to do all the chores too. Let me tell you, I’m going to enjoy watching her get taken down a peg or ten.”

His gaze betrayed him, and he glanced over to the other corner. Sage had turned from the table and was now standing in the shadows just inside the monstrous outside door, waiting. Alone.

Why did that word seem to follow her around?

“I do feel a little sorry for Rory though.” Jaycee shook her head, and the fact that she was relishing this was obvious. “Got to be tough being in a relationship when your girlfriend can’t keep herself out of grounded jail for more than a day at a time.”

Luke’s heart hurt for her, for Sage Wentworth. That look in her eyes as she waited there, arching her shoulders when her hands pushed up from the desk. She wasn’t looking at anyone in particular, more trying not to be seen he surmised. Reaching down, she scratched her elbow, and her sigh was visible from all the way across the room. Still, she was really good at hiding the truth because if he didn’t know her better, he probably would have figured she was bored silly with the proceedings. Arrogant. Haughty. Nose-in-the-air. A real snob. He could see how easily someone could misread that look.

“Jaycee, come here and meet Mary Atwater,” their mother suddenly said, breaking right into the middle of his thoughts.

“Oh, uh…” Jaycee looked up at him.

“No worries. I’ll see you later.” He waved as Mrs. Lawrence corralled her daughter.

“Yes, this is Jaycee. I know she’s grown so much, right? She’ll be a junior next year...”

Very gingerly Luke removed himself from that hemisphere and put one hand in his pocket as he ambled across the lobby to the other corner.

The center of her heart jolted to a stop when Sage saw him coming her direction. He looked absolutely gorgeous in a so-not-her-style-but-heart-stopping-anyway kind of way. But the thing she noticed most was that he looked like he thought she might shoot him for coming over to talk to her, so Sage smiled softly, hoping he wouldn’t just walk right on past her and out the door though the whole way, she knew that was a possibility.

Right in front of her, he stopped and put his hand on the back of his head. “Hey.”

“Hey,” she said back, but she couldn’t hold his gaze, nor could she breathe.

“So.” His gaze came down, trying to hook hers into coming back up, which wasn’t working. “Are you okay?”

Somehow she hadn’t really thought he would care. Somehow that anyone did surprised her. She shrugged, lifting both shoulders but not her gaze. “I’m… fine.” The nod hurt as it threatened to dredge up the tears. Sage, come on. Get it together! Don’t cry here! Stop being such a drama queen.

“Are you sure?” He scratched his head as his gaze stayed on her. It was unnerving because for some unknown reason she couldn’t just lie to him like she did everyone else. But she couldn’t tell him the truth either. No, she had to keep her distance and get him to stop looking at her like that.

“Y-yeah. Of course. Why wouldn’t I be?” But her gaze did a pitiful job of holding his. Some of it was how he was looking at her and some was that keeping the tears down was getting harder by the second.

“Well,” he said as he tipped his head down still trying to capture her gaze, “for one thing, you about had me scared to death last night.” He glanced back across the lobby. “For another Jayc just told me you’re grounded for two weeks.”

The tears were now nearly impossible to hold back, and the dam in her spirit was quaking dangerously. “Yeah, well.” She shrugged. “I came home smelling like a brewery.” Pursing her lips together, she refused to give in to the onslaught. “So, what did I expect, right?”

“But you weren’t drinking?”

This nod only started down before it dipped sideways. “Guilt by association.” She lifted a shoulder in acceptance. “Besides, what else would they expect from someone like me?”

“Someone like…” But he didn’t get the whole question out.

“Sage, are you coming?”

Somehow in the midst of the conversation with Sage, Luke had lost track of Jaycee and the others. They were now bunched by the outside door, waiting, and when he turned, he caught the look his best friend sent him, and it wasn’t particularly friendly.

Sage half-smiled up at him. “I’d better go. You take care.”

Frozen for one second too long, Luke shook himself out of the thoughts. “Yeah. You too.”

Just as they walked out, Jaycee caught his eye and shook her head. She was angry. Sage was crushed. Why couldn’t he do anything to make things right with either of them?

On the way home, Sage sat all-but pressed against the door. The others were content to act like she wasn’t even there, which was fine with her. The less she talked, the less chance that she would burst into a puddle of tears.

Once home, they all went their separate ways with Jaycee saying something about a party one of her friends was having. A pool party from what Sage had gathered. A pool party she wasn’t invited to. A pool party she wouldn’t have been able to go to even if she had been invited. That hurt—her pride, her feelings, something. She wasn’t sure, but it hurt just the same.

It was a veritable miracle that she made it into her room without completely losing it, and once inside, she let out the breath she’d been holding all morning. Looking around the room, her head swum with the unshed tears. They would do her no good. Of that, she was sure.

In fact, the tears probably said more about her selfishness than anything. Just like she told Luke, what had she expected—that they would give her the benefit of the doubt, that they would have given her a chance to explain or to express how incredibly scared she had been? Of course not. They knew what her kind was like when she showed up at the front door. In fact, they had probably had whole conversations before she ever showed up about how disruptive she would be to their perfect little family unit. And now they were telling each other “I told you so.”

She sat on the desk chair in front of the mirror and removed the pins from her hair one-by-one, letting it cascade down and over her shoulders. Pretty little thing. That’s what they all thought, that’s all they all saw. A pretty face with a trust fund to boot. And maybe, they were all right. Maybe that’s all she really was—inside and out. A pretty face with a bank account to back it up.

Her gaze fell from the girl’s in the mirror, and she wondered as she sat there, which side of the glass was even real. Were either of them real, or were they both just illusions, mirages.

That would be so much easier, so much better. She was sure mirages didn’t hurt like this, that reflections didn’t disappoint everyone. Sadly, she laid the brush down and went to change. Who was she trying to impress anyway? Everyone who lived here knew what she was, who she was, how she was. There was no image left, only the hollow emptiness she had been afraid was there the whole time.

Luke knew Sage was grounded, and he shook his head at that as he got ready for the Riley’s annual swim party. Megan Riley. She was in Jaycee’s grade, and she’d been having pool parties for her birthday since the 7th grade when she’d discovered boys, and they had discovered her.

He was sure Jaycee would be going, and had things been different, Sage might have come too. His mind went on an unbidden trip wondering if Rory would be there. Would he go without Sage? Then Luke shook his head, of course Rory would. In fact, he suspected that Rory’s fascination with Sage was skin-deep if that.

She was a trophy girl. A beautiful one to be sure but a trophy girl nonetheless. Add to it the fact that she was from Hollywood, California, and it was no wonder that Rory had wiggled his way by her side as soon as she had shown up. Luke grabbed the sunscreen and a towel from the bathroom as he wondered about the evening the two of them had spent together. The truth was, he could see how they made a good couple even though that killed him to admit. He was just worried that the Rory Harris he knew would be anywhere near the Sage Wentworth he was getting to know.

For the first hour after they got home, the house was a bustle of activity; however, after a while, it slid into silence, and Sage’s spirit settled into complacency. She looked around her room. This was life—like it or not, and mostly these days, it was not.

He had never been overly fond of water or any place that required body comparisons. Worse, other than Jaycee, Luke couldn’t think of five people he really wanted to spend time with at this party, and after those last few minutes at church, he wasn’t sure she was on the list either.

However, this was one of those parties that unless you had a good reason, you didn’t miss. So at just after four, he pulled up at the little country house with the raucous noises enveloping it. Everyone was out back, poolside. There would be food aplenty, music, and boys showing off by trying to get the girls wet. Probably they already were for the squeals emanating from the occasion.

Luke grabbed up his towel and went around the back. No reason to go in the front, no one did. At the gate, he unlatched it and let himself in. Sure enough most of the high school and a few people he didn’t recognize were in full-party mode on the other side. Screams and squeals, splashes and yells melded together into one cacophony of happy sounds.

From across the way, he caught sight of Jaycee and headed that way. Might as well get this over with.

Sage had laid on her bed thinking until the walls started closing in. She was tired of this room, tired of living this reflection she now called life. Surely they didn’t expect her to stay behind closed doors for two weeks. Getting up and checking herself in the mirror out of pure habit, she fingered the loose braid that now went down her right shoulder, adjusted the slightly oversized white blouse, and sighed. No one was going to see her anyway. What did it matter?

With that depressing thought, she quietly went out her door and down the hall. If she ran into anyone, she would simply make the excuse that she was going to the bathroom and disappear back into her room. However, she found no one.

Presumably Ryder had in fact gone to his friend’s house like he was begging to on the way home from church, and when she passed Jaycee’s room, the door was open and the room was empty. She was probably at the pool party soaking in the warm rays of Luke’s love by now. Sage beat that thought back and quietly continued down to the bend in the hallway which couched her parents’ bedroom on one side and a modicum of freedom in the guise of the den on the other.

Checking in all directions lest she get caught, she went into the den and over to the bookshelf. The television would be far too loud and would call attention to her. That was definitely out. At the little shelf, she scanned the books. Her first idea was fiction, but before she found anything of interest, her gaze stumbled on a title that intrigued her—Man’s Search for Meaning.

She fingered the small book and then pulled it down. If anything, she could use some meaning in her life right now.

“You made it,” Jaycee said, her gaze coming up to his.

Luke put his hands out. “I did indeed.”

The smile didn’t make it all the way up, but it was half there. At least she wasn’t going to yell at him in front of everyone.

There was an awkward pause that Luke didn’t know how to fill as Jaycee’s gaze slipped past him and held. Luke glanced around trying to figure out what she was looking at.

“Rachel made it,” Jaycee finally said, tipping her drink in the other direction behind him, and Luke turned that way to see that Rachel was in fact lounging with her friends on the chairs.

“How nice for her.”

Jaycee made a clicking sound with her tongue and took a drink of whatever was in her cup. “I don’t know what I’m going to do with you.” She shook her head. “Seriously, would it kill you to make a move on somebody? Anybody? There are half-a-hundred girls here, and you’re over here with me.”

Anger bubbled to the surface. “What’s that supposed to mean? I’m not supposed to be over here with you?”

“You know what I mean.”

“No, Jaycee. I don’t. Enlighten me.”

Letting the cup drop, Jaycee eyed him. “Okay, look, when you’re over here all the time, everyone gets the idea that we’re together. If we’re together, no other guys are ever going to pay any attention to me.”

“Oh.” Luke lifted his chin in understanding. “So this isn’t about my chances with someone. This is about me ruining your chances by hanging out with you.” Nodding, he backed up. “Okay. I see how it is. You don’t want to hang out with me?” He backed up farther and put both hands in the air. “That’s cool.”

“Luke,” she pleaded, but he was still backing away.

“No. Hey. I don’t want to mess up your chances. My bad. I’ll go find some other place to be.”

“Come on. Don’t be like that. It’s just, there’s some guys here from Greely, and…” She shrugged.

“No. No need to paint me a picture. I’ll see you later, Jayc. Have fun at the party.”

Her eyes pleaded with him to not be mad. He wasn’t mad, hurt maybe, but not mad. His gaze swept the area, and seeing no other safe place to go, he went to the snack table at the other side of the pool by the back door. Lunch had been minimal, and he was kind of hungry. A snack might not be such a bad thing.

Sitting on the brown faux-leather couch, Sage pulled her feet up onto it as well as she leaned back into the armrest—half sitting, half laying. The room was comfortable, warm without being hot. Other than all the browns, it was a nice enough room. She curled up, opened the book, and started reading.

“Seriously, dude, just like that, in your truck?”

Luke was at the snack table munching on crackers and cheese when his attention magnetized to the conversation going on behind him between about five guys who were only steps away.

“Just like that. Putty in my hands.”

And Luke thought he would be sick. There, in all his glory, stood none other than Rory Harris. Chewing harder, Luke fought to keep his fists from pounding the guy into the concrete. Not here. Not now, Luke.

“Easiest one I’ve ever had. Front of the truck, back of the truck. I’m telling you, she couldn’t get enough of me.”

Heat began pouring from Luke, and it had nothing to do with the late afternoon sun.

“Yes!” one of the guys said and high-fived Rory.

“Go Rory!” another one said.

“I’ll tell you what, I can’t fault whoever taught her about the casting couch,” Rory said. “They did good.”

Bile began seeping up into Luke’s gut. They were talking about Sage, and the crowd around Rory was eating it up.

“Hey, Harris, I don’t see her here. What’d she do—dump you for someone else already?”

“She’s probably resting.” Rory took a long drink, letting that sink in. “Getting ready for some more Rory.”

The laughter sliced right through Luke’s patience. Knowing if he stood there even another second, Rory was going to be dunked unceremoniously into the pool, he pitched a wrapper into the trash and headed back over to where Jaycee was talking with some friends. He recognized them but didn’t care enough not to be rude.

When he got to her, he separated her from them with one yank of her arm. “Where’s Sage?”

Jaycee’s eyes held surprise and then fell into anger. “Sage? Who cares about her?”

However, this time he wasn’t backing down. “I do. Where is she?”

That looked like it tasted bad in Jaycee’s mouth. “Home I guess. She’s grounded, remember?”

Luke jerked his gaze back over to the jerks across the way still laughing at her expense, dragging her name through the mud, conjuring up a Sage that wasn’t even real.

“What is wrong with you?” Jaycee snapped her fingers in front of his eyes. “Luke. Hey. Dude. Snap out of it.”

His gaze came back to hers, and now there was ice in his veins. “I’ll see you later.”

“Later? But you just got here!”

He stepped past her toward the gate.

“Luke!” she yelled after him, causing half the party to look their way. “What are you doing?”

With one turn he tilted his head at her. “What do you care?”

And with that, he left the party.

“Sage?” her stepmother said in surprise when she came through the den and stopped when she saw her on the couch.

“Oh, hi.” Sage looked up, over the couch back and got something of a smile to her face.

“You’re… reading.”

“I found it on the shelf. I hope you don’t mind.” The last thing she wanted was another fight. She was tired of the fighting, and now, she began to wonder if those too were her fault.

“Oh. No. I don’t mind.” Another second and she continued down the hallway.

Sage let her gaze stay on the empty doorway another two seconds, and then, with a sigh she went back to her reading.

Figuring that showing up in swim trunks and a towel wouldn’t be particularly welcome, Luke made the short drive home, changed in record time—jeans and a decent blue button-down, grabbed his phone and headed back out. She was at home, and presumably she wasn’t going anywhere. It wasn’t an ambush, but after today, he didn’t want her to be stuck in solitary any longer either. She needed a friend, and he was going to be there for her if she would let him.

“So where is your sister anyway?” Rory asked as he suddenly was standing with one foot on the brace of the chair next to Jaycee.

She spun, startled by the sound of his voice and the electric feel of his presence. It took a full 30 seconds for her to regain her composure. After all, he was in swim trunks without the benefit of a shirt, the outfit made the muscles on his tanned chest impossible to ignore.

“Oh.” Jaycee swallowed and brushed the hair from her eyes. “Didn’t she tell you? She got grounded last night. Two weeks.” She nodded at the expression on his face. “I know, bummer, right?”

“But we were there on time. We weren’t late.”

The nodding continued as she dipped her gaze to her cup and leaned toward him. “I don’t think it was late that was the problem.”

His dark eyes drilled through her, surmising, questioning. “The drinking thing?”

Jaycee pinched her lips together and nodded as if thinking through the question. “I do think that had something to do with it.”

“But she wasn’t drinking. She didn’t… drink. I don’t think. How can they bust her for something she didn’t do?

“Oh, you would be surprised what they can find to bust a person for.” She considered stopping there, but resentment for Sage snaked through her. “You know, it’s probably none of my business, but if it were me, I wouldn’t waste my time waiting around for her. I don’t see her ever not being grounded for very long.”

Worry slid onto his face. “Why not?”

“Well, when you have parents like I have—the kind that think the rules are important, and you have somebody like Sage who couldn’t care less… I mean, not that I’m telling you what to do or anything, but I’m guessing you’re going to do a lot of waiting for her to get ungrounded between now and August.” She shrugged and ducked to her drink. “Just, you know, an FYI.”

He stood and backed up. “Yeah, thanks for that.”

“Knock. Knock.”

Sage’s whole body jolted with the sound as her gaze jerked up and over to the door. Her eyes went wide and then wider still when she saw who was standing there, and her heart said she must be dreaming. “Luke?” She cleared her throat and sat up straighter. “What’re…” It came out as a squeak, and she cleared her throat again. “What… What’re you doing here?”

He tilted his head to the side, sending the longish blond locks sliding off his head as his gaze drank her in. That soft, gentle smile drilled through her. “Just came by to say hey.”

The top of her eyebrows arched for the ceiling. “Hey? You came by to say hey?” She was uncoiling so fast, falling off the couch was a real possibility.

“Yeah. Your mom let me in. I hope it’s okay.” He let go of the doorpost, stuck his hands in his jeans pockets, came over, and stood at the other end of the couch looking down at her. Every step of the distance he closed between them hammered across her heart, and when he was right there, his grayish-green eyes were soft and unbelievably gentle as he gazed down at her.

“I…” Sage struggled to get the pieces of her heart gathered around her while simultaneously holding on to her sanity. This was not what it seemed. It was not what it seemed. It couldn’t be. He’s not here for you, Sage. He’s not here for you. “Uh, Jaycee’s not here. She went to the pool party.”

Luke smiled at her, and her heart forgot how to beat. “I didn’t come for Jaycee.” He glanced down at the couch. “May I?”

Who was this and what was he doing here? Who was she and how was this happening? Every thought was making less sense than the one before it. “Uh, s-sure.” She started to move her legs, still bent at the knees, to get her feet off the couch.

“No. It’s okay,” he said, stopping her from moving as he sat down. “Please. Stay comfortable. It’s fine.”

Stay comfortable? Well, that was going to be a challenge with him sitting right there! “O… kay.” She let her legs relax against the couch back as she surveyed him, now sitting there at the other end of the couch. Looking at him was dangerous to her heart, not looking at him was impossible. What was he doing here?

He turned to her then, spinning his own knee up onto the couch and arching his arm over the back of it. He lifted his chin. “So, whatcha readin’?”

Funny, she could barely remember. She lifted the book for him to read the title.

One skim, and he nodded, obviously impressed. “Man’s Search for Meaning. Good one. We read that, in youth group last year. Vicktor Frankl, right? The Holocaust?”

It sure would’ve been nice if she could think straight, if she could figure out why he was sitting here, what he was doing here. She nodded and then let her face fall into concern. “Um, aren’t you supposed to be at a pool party somewhere?”

A breath and he put his head back and then shrugged with the shoulder next to the couch. “I’m not much on swimming.”

Really, she really wished she could snap out of the feeling that this was a dream she was going to wake up from. Then again, it was the nicest dream she’d had in a long time. “Jaycee said it was supposed to be the party of the year.” Sage put her hands out jazz-hand style as if fending off spotlights.

His smile dimmed just a bit. “Yeah, well, Jaycee says a lot of things.” Like it was cutting through steel, his gaze narrowed. “So what do you think of the book? You reading it for school or something?”

Lifting it again, she shrugged. “Something to do. I thought maybe it would help.”

“Help? How?” Why did he have to look so comfortable sitting there, like this wasn’t awkward and terrifying at all?

“You know, search for meaning, figure things out.” Her shrug was slower. “Make sense of something.”

His gaze became far more thoughtful. “Like what?”

That sent Sage back into the memories, and every one hurt worse than the last. “Just… a lot of things.”

“Name one.”

Sanity told her not to go down this road. Not here, in this house, with him. He could use whatever she said against her. He was Jaycee’s friend, not hers. Still, the emotions and the tears hadn’t been buried deeply enough, and both came up. She crushed her lips together to keep from letting the wall around her heart crumble. “Being here, trying to fit in.”

She thought she was strong enough to hold his gaze. She was wrong. Dipping her eyes down, her head followed, and she saw the book. “And then I read this, and I think I’m such a drama queen about everything.” With a tug she lifted the book. “I mean these people were facing death. They had real, major problems.”

“And you don’t?”

“Not like this. Not like them. I mean, what do I have to freak out about? Being away from home? A lot of people do that. Being here and not really knowing how I fit or if I fit? That happens all the time. So why do I feel so…?”

In the pause, she felt his gaze melding into her spirit. “So?”

“Frustrated. It’s like I can’t do anything right. Like every, single thing I do is wrong, and no matter how hard I try to make this work, it just keeps getting worse.”

His gaze never left her nor did it lose the gentleness. “This?”

She looked around the room in frustration. “This. Life. Being in this family, here in this town.”

“And back home, you fit?”

“Better than here.” However, her heart snagged on a few things that were far less than perfect with that back-home picture. “Okay, so my family was never real big on being an actual family, but besides that...”

He tilted his head. “Explain that.”

Sage squinted into the feelings she was only just discovering were inside her. “Do you know how many nannies I had by the time I was in second grade?”

Confusion marred his face. “No.”

“Yeah. Neither do I. They came, stayed around for a few months, and then they’d be gone. I’d get another nanny, and we’d start all back over.”

“Where were your parents?”

“Good question. Dad was a corporate lawyer, so he was gone a lot. I don’t think Mom stayed home a day of her life that she wasn’t sick. Except on holidays when they’d have someone we didn’t even know come to the house and decorate all day, and then leave for a month until they came back to undecorated on December 26th.” She shook her head. “I don’t ever remember a Christmas that we did anything really Christmasy together. Like stringing popcorn or singing carols, not even going to church. Nothing as a family.”

“Ever?”

She hated the admission. “No. Not really.”

“Christmas morning?”

“Oh, there’d be presents under the tree, all wrapped up in the same designer’s best paper. Better Homes and Gardens perfect.” She laughed, then let the sigh go and pulled her gaze up to his. Suddenly all the feelings and thoughts that had been swimming around in her head since she’d first arrived surfaced. “Can I tell you something?”

Seriousness followed the surprise. “Sure.”

“I was thinking the other day, while I was dusting.” Pulling herself up again, she twisted just enough to indicate the mantel. “You see those pictures up there?”

Luke glanced up and nodded. “Yeah?”

“Yeah.” She nodded too and then clamped the emotion down. Why was she telling him this again? Nothing in her could remember, and all she could think was how incredibly bad her heart ached at the thoughts. “Well, we don’t have pictures like that in California. Not in my house anyway. We have art. Very, very expensive art.”

As he watched her, Luke heard the rushing current of tears just beneath the surface, and he was glad he had come. He was right. She needed someone, a friend, and he was very glad to be that someone.

“I don’t think I ever really questioned that until I came here,” she continued softly. Then she smiled a heart-breaking smile. “I bet your family’s great.”

That stunned him deeper than he expected it to go, and he leveled his gaze at her. “Why’s that?”

A moment and she shrugged. “Because you’re here.” Then she grew pensive as she gazed right into his soul. “Why are you here, Luke? Why aren’t you out with Jaycee? You really should be with her, you know.”

That was a very good question. One he really couldn’t even answer without putting his heart into major jeopardy. Softly, carefully, he let his hand fall from the back of the couch until it landed on her ankle, and she jumped at his touch. “I don’t know. Because something told me you might need someone to help you wash the dishes.”

The craziest thing was when her stepmom asked if Luke was staying, he said yes, and then he actually did. Sage truly couldn’t account for any of it, but she found herself just the same, sitting at the kitchen table with Ryder on one side and Luke right next to her as if this all made any sense at all. She couldn’t look at him. That much she had surmised from their very brief time together earlier. Every time she did, her heart did all kinds of strange things that her face couldn’t deny as well as she would have liked it to.

“This lasagna is amazing,” Luke said to Sage’s stepmom as they sat devouring the meal, and the compliment found its mark with no effort.

“Why thank you, Luke. It was my grandmother’s secret recipe.”

“Your grandmother? Mrs. Upton, right?” he asked, never missing a beat or a bite. He washed that one down with some water.

“Yes,” she said completely surprised and impressed. “Now, how would you know that?”

“Oh, I remember her. She used to give me candy at church.”

“Seriously?” Ryder asked. “Candy at church?”

“Scout’s honor.” Luke raised two fingers. “Every Sunday morning, we’d sit right in front of her. She always sat in the back in the wheelchair.” He shook his head. “I couldn’t have been, what? Three? Four? At the most.”

“Jaycee was only two when she died.”

“But I remember her. Man, I would beg my mom to let me go and sit on her lap so she’d give me that candy.”

Mrs. Lawrence raised her fork. “She was a teacher, you know?”

“Really? I didn’t know that.”

“Taught for years in the younger grades. She was a mainstay at the school until she could hardly get around anymore.”

“I remember her. She was the one who busted me for chasing the girls with a snail,” Mr. Lawrence suddenly said. “First grade. I thought I was done for when she took me down to the principal’s office.”

“You should’ve been,” Mrs. Lawrence said. “Chasing little girls with a snail. That’s just not right.”

“I was six. What do you expect?”

Mrs. Lawrence shook her head. “Ryder, don’t listen to your father. Be nice to the girls.”

“I was nice. I was trying to show them the snail!”

Next to her Luke laughed, and Sage was beginning to wonder what had happened to her family. They sounded almost… normal.

“So, Luke, what are your plans after May?” Mr. Lawrence asked.

Luke cut into more of the lasagna. “Not real sure. I’ve thought about trade school, construction, welding, working with my hands, something like that. But I haven’t really narrowed it down yet.”

“Oh, that wishing well you made for Jaycee last Christmas,” Mrs. Lawrence said. “I told Greg I wanted one.”

Her husband laughed, and she nodded. “And that’s exactly the response I got, too.”

Brushing the unspoken compliment aside, Luke shrugged. “It was just a quick thing to kill some time in woodshop, but once she saw it, man, I thought Jaycee would disown me if I didn’t give it to her.”

Jaycee. Sage’s heart and soul fell on the name. It was like a pin-prick to a balloon you had fallen in love with. As nice as all this was, this was Jaycee’s family, Jaycee’s life, Jaycee’s boyfriend for crying out loud. What was she doing pretending she had any place here?

“Well, if you’re ever bored,” Mrs. Lawrence said, “I would love to have one.”

Luke nodded and took a drink, draining the water all the way to the bottom of the glass so that the ice cubes in it clinked. When he set it down, Sage noticed and stood. His gaze followed her up with concern. “Do you need something?”

When she looked down into those soft, hazy green gorgeous eyes, she knew she would be repaying him for his simple kindness to her forever. “No. I was just going to get you some more water.” Carefully, she retrieved his glass as every person at the table stopped to stare at her. She looked around at them. “What? I can’t get our guest more water?”

“No.”

“That’s fine.”

“Of course.”

“Uh, I could…” Luke reached for his glass that was already in her hand, but she dodged his movement.

“No.” She lifted her chin. “You’re the guest, and I can get you some water.”

For some unknown reason, Luke suddenly felt like he’d been hit by a full-on Taser. Had Sage Wentworth just insisted on serving him? He gulped that understanding down as he turned to all of them, finding them looking as stunned as he was. “O…kay. Sure. I’d love some.”

When dinner was over, Sage corralled what was left of her pride, a not-very-easy task considering the circumstances. She wished Luke would leave already because now it really was time to do the dishes, and although he had teased her about it before, letting him watch her utterly humiliate herself didn’t sound overly pleasant.

“Sage, honey, don’t forget the pans and the sink,” her stepmother said as she stood from the table after Ryder and her husband had gone into the living room to catch the ballgame on television. “And use the BarBeO. That makes everything sparkle.”

Sage cringed and fought to smile. “BarBeO it is.”

And with that, her stepmother waltzed out of the kitchen.

At the table with him at her elbow, Sage sighed, willing it not to come out in a rush that would embarrass her further. It took next to nothing to notice that the kitchen was a wreck, and she was pretty sure her stepmother had used more pans than were probably necessary just to make a point. It was going to be a long two weeks.

“Well, we’d better get this done so you can get back to your reading,” Luke said, standing and reaching for the plates.

“Oh!” The sound was more a squeal than a word as she jumped up too. However, she reached for his arm rather than the dishes, and the brush of it jerked through her whole system causing sanity to scatter like leaves on an autumn breeze. Swallowing, she took her hand off his arm as his gaze came down to hers and locked there.

“What? You don’t want some help?”

It was hard to smile through the emotions bunching up in her spirit. “You really don’t have to. I mean, it’s dishes.”

Luke lifted three plates and a glass from the table. “A few dishes never killed anyone.” He grinned at her as he leaned down. “And remember, no lying over dishes.”

That sparked her soul. What was he saying, and why did he look like he was having the time of his life?

“You really don’t have to,” she said meekly.

He nodded. “I know.”

Chapter 12

“So tell me about California,” Luke said as he watched her, elbow deep in the dish water, running the little cloth over and over the pan she had been working on for five minutes. The dishwasher was loaded and washing, but the pans were going to take more help than that machine could manage.

“Hm.” She cleared her throat, and he knew she was navigating uncharted territory. Strange how he got the feeling no one else had ever bothered to ask. Her head stayed down as she continued to wash. “Um, California?”

“Yeah, you know, California, Hollywood.” He grinned at her, hoping to take the edge off of the request. More than anything else in the whole world, he wanted to know everything about her, and California seemed as good a place to start as anything.

“Hm,” she said again, ducking further so all he could see was the waves of her blonde hair.

Watching her efforts that were getting her nowhere, Luke finally reached across the sink and handed her the scrubber. “Here. Maybe this will help.” She wasn’t kidding about not knowing how to do this.

“Thanks.”

A scrub on the pan, and she lifted her chin and resettled it.

“So,” he finally said, trying again, “California.”

She nodded, her head bobbing up and down. “Well, um, I’ve lived there all my life, except for a few summers when I was littler. It’s fun, great even. Lots of sunshine and things to do. I like school as much as someone can like school.”

He saw the opening. “Favorite class?”

“Art.”

“Art? Really?”

The effort it was taking her to talk seemed to drift away from her as wistfulness took over. “I’m not really that great at drawing, but I love putting things together.” Finally, that pan was miraculously finished, and she put it in the other sink. Instantly he reached to rinse it.

“Things? Like what?”

Her shrug was much more like pulling her shoulders together than up. “Like fabrics and colors and things. I like how they go together, putting them together.”

“Oh. Like the upcycling thing. Taking one thing and another thing and putting them together to make something new.”

Wow did he like those eyes when they came up to meet his. Every time she did that, he had to put extra effort into remembering what they were talking about and that they were only talking. It wasn’t easy.

“Huh, I’ve never really thought about it like that, but yeah, I guess so.” This pan came clean much quicker. “We did this assignment once where we got to design a room.” The wistfulness took over again, and he was really starting to like that sound. “I could have lived in my room.”

“The one you designed?”

“Yeah.”

Now he was caught in her wistfulness. “Why?”

“It was just so… peaceful, so… I don’t even know… perfect?”

Running the towel over one pan, Luke leaned on the sink wanting to see her as she talked. “Tell me about it.”

Instead of looking at him, her head jerked the other way and down. Quiet had invaded even her slow movements. “It was a room, a bedroom, and it had a big bed that faced the door. I did it all in blue.”

“That’s your favorite color?”

She nodded almost without moving her head. “And greens and some yellows, just for some different pops of color. But I didn’t do it like anything definite. It was more like an abstract painting with all the colors playing off of each other. It had pillows on the bed and chair and paintings on the wall. I even made a notebook about it after the project was over, just so I could see if I could find things like I was seeing in my head.”

Laying that pan in the other sink, she reached for another.

“And did you? Could you find those things?”

A moment and she shrugged. “I finally stopped trying.”

He absorbed that as he rinsed the pan and cut the water. “So where’s the notebook?”

The shrug was barely there. “Back home somewhere. I don’t know. I kind of lost track of it.”

Luke nodded as he dried the pan. “So when did you stop upcycling?”

That brought out half a smile. “When I figured out everyone else thought it was dumb. Shopping for new stuff is a lot more fun.”

However, he could tell that was a lie because she said it and then shook her head. His gaze came over her then, and he saw with perfect clarity the struggle in her to be someone everyone else wanted her to be rather than who she really was. “So have you dug the sewing machine out yet?”

They were down to the last couple of pans, and Sage was glad. She was worn out from this conversation mostly because guarding her heart when he kept asking was harder than she had ever imagined it could be. “Yeah. But I don’t know.” The sigh took her spirit down with it. “I mean, what if I don’t remember how? I’d hate to ruin your present.”

“Well, considering Plan B is my old Lego blocks, I’m begging you not to let me down.”

That dragged her skeptical gaze up to him. He couldn’t be serious.

“Yeah, that’s what Alyssa’s gonna say too,” he said when he saw the look. “I’m begging you. Please help me out here.”

Carefully Sage let her gaze fall back to the pan in her hands. “Why don’t you make her a wishing well?”

It was his turn to fall quiet, and after a second, she looked up at him, wondering at that. Slowly he shook his head, but he said nothing as he dried the pan in his hands.

“Come on now. No lying over dishes,” she said with teasing around the edges of the words, coxing him out of the silence.

He looked down at her, and the vulnerability that was never far from the surface was evident in his amazing eyes. For a moment the pans were forgotten as her gaze twined through his, and then his gaze fell and fled.

“What?” she asked, realizing there was far more to that story than she had at first thought.

A moment and he shrugged. “I don’t know. It’s just…”

Real worry drifted through her. He had been so wonderful with everything, she wanted to repay him for that even if she didn’t know quite how. “Just what, Luke?”

The back door banged, causing them both to jump as the connection between them was smashed. Luke took a step away from her just as Jaycee came in the other direction.

Her sister stopped and tilted her head in surprise. “Luke? I thought that was your car. What’re you doing here?”

Instantly, he was nervous, and Sage couldn’t blame him.

“He just stopped by to say hi,” Sage said, thinking he didn’t deserve a bullet. “Mom insisted that he stay for dinner.”

“Oh.” Jaycee let her swim bag slide to the floor.

It took a moment, but Sage sensed Luke start breathing again.

“How was the party?” he asked, never stopping the drying of the pan that was long since dry.

Jaycee arched her shoulders. “It was okay.” Slowly, she narrowed her gaze at them and then trained it on Sage. “Rory was there. He was asking about you.”

It was amazing how little it took to deflate the nice fantasy that life could be anything but totally miserable. “Oh.” With half a nod, Sage went back to the dishes, her heart now as heavy as the dishwater. “Did you tell him…?”

However, Jaycee waved her hand. “No worries. I think Megan made sure he wasn’t too lonely.”

“Meg…” but the syllable was only a breath.

The yell from the living room yanked all three of their gazes that direction and jostled Sage’s fragile spirit even further.

“They watching the game?” Jaycee asked, pulling her bag back up off the floor.

“Sounds like it,” Luke said. It was amazing how he could be standing so close and yet feel so incredibly far away. Sage felt the separation between them down to her toes, and she hated herself for that. He was just a nice guy being a nice guy. Nothing more. Nothing less. It was her that was making way too much of this.

“Awesome!” Jaycee said. “Sounds like the Sox are winning for a change.” She crossed the kitchen to the living room entrance as Luke set the pan down on the counter without a sound. At the door, Jaycee turned and looked only at Luke. “You comin’? We can’t miss the Sox.”

“Uh. Yeah.” He glanced at Sage who couldn’t so much as look at him or he would see everything that was in her heart.

Head down, she could almost feel the pity he never put into words. She shook her head. “I can finish these up. Don’t worry about it. Go on and watch the game.”

The towel still in hand, he never moved. “You sure?”

“Yeah.” She had to get her gaze up to his, so he would have a prayer of believing her. “Of course. Go. Have fun.”

His eyes asked questions his lips never uttered.

“Really. I’m almost finished anyway.”

“Hey. Luke. You comin’ or what?” Jaycee asked.

Very different words went through his eyes even as he said, “Yeah, I’m coming.”

As he stepped out, Sage looked down at her hands. Prunicated. It was a very good word to describe them and her heart.

Somehow Luke had convinced himself that Sage would come join them for the game; however, when a full 15 minutes had passed, he began to realize she wasn’t going to come into the living room.

“Isn’t Banthum awesome?” Jaycee said as she curled on the couch next to him and wound herself closer to him.

That slammed anger into him. How many times had she done that? How many times had he convinced himself that it meant something, that she could fall for him, that this was going anywhere? How naïve could he be? She only wanted to be with him when it suited her. When it didn’t…

He wondered about Sage, about their conversation earlier. Designing. It fit her, and yet in a strange way, he sensed that her style of designing and what every person would think it would be when they looked at her was completely different. There was a Sage under all that silk and lace that he was beginning to think no other person on the planet had ever seen. It fascinated him, beckoned to him, held him utterly spellbound.

No lying over dishes. He smiled at the simplicity of the rule. If it was up to him, they could do dishes forever.

The sewing machine was different than hers at home, but Sage studied it until she figured out how to get the thread to feed properly. Hoping that her stepmom wouldn’t mind, she pulled out two pieces of the scraps and stitched them together to check the tension and the evenness of the stitches. When the first seam was in, she detached the scraps and tested it.

Yes, solid.

Now to find the right color of thread.

Ryder was doing a happy dance on a Sox double play as the clock spun around to ten. Remarkably the Sox hadn’t tanked their lead. In fact, at 7-2, they actually looked on their way to winning this one. Luke glanced over at the clock. It wasn’t late, and the game wasn’t over, but he was beginning to get seriously concerned about Sage. She hadn’t even said good night just disappeared from the fabric of the family, and seemingly no one had even missed her. He sighed and went to move off the couch.

Jaycee’s gaze slid over to him questioningly.

He ran his hand back over his hair. “I’m beat. I think I’m going to take off.”

“Already? It’s only the 7th.”

“I know, but it was a late night last night and a long day today.” His thoughts went to the night before, and he thanked God again for getting her home safely.

“Oh. Well, okay. Call me tomorrow,” Jaycee said. “Maybe we can hang out.”

Amazing how easily she turned being his friend off and on. “I’ll see. Dad wants me to work on the lawn, and I’ve got that bench to build for Mrs. Riley.”

Jaycee nodded. “Well, call me anyway… when you get the chance.”

Now wasn’t the time to get into this, so he just shrugged. “I’ll try.”

“K.”

He stepped aside and waved to the others. “G’night.”

“Oh, Luke,” Mrs. Lawrence said. “Are you leaving so soon?”

“Gotta get an early start tomorrow.”

“Okay. Well, tell your mom we said hello.”

“Will do.” He waved again. “G’night.”

The others acknowledged his departure but then went back to the game. Luke knew his way out of this house so well he could do it blindfolded, and when he turned the corner into the kitchen, he thought that might come in handy. Sage had shut out the lights and the kitchen was bathed in only soft, silvery moonlight from the window. He noticed the pans still stacked on the counter, and he wished again that they could just stand there and wash dishes together.

As he strode through the kitchen, his gaze tripped the other way and grabbed onto the faint yellow light coming from the edge of the hallway. He’d never had cause to think about where she was staying before, but now he realized she was probably back there, in the little sewing nook. Strange how his mind pictured her in the designer room she had described so very easily. This picture looked nothing like that one.

He knew he should just leave, but glancing back to make sure no one had followed him, he decided that just saying a quick good night wouldn’t hurt. Quickly, quietly, he turned and headed for the little hallway. The door itself was open just a sliver, and holding his heart in both hands, he reached up and knocked softly.

Sage was busy pinning the pink lace to the little armholes, lost in a world all her own when suddenly she looked up, and he somehow was standing there, at her door again.

“Knock. Knock.”

Surprise jumped on her so fast she almost inhaled the pins in her mouth. “Oh!” She spat them out like they were poison. “Luke? What’re…?” Her nerves sprang to life as she stood from the little card table with the wobbly leg. “I didn’t… I… Uh…”

His smile wafted across her heart and tingled there. “Sorry. I was just heading…” He hooked his thumb over his shoulder and leaned on the doorpost.

Sage’s body took over for her brain, standing her up out of the chair so fast that she bumped her leg into the table. “Ow! Oh. Gosh. Um… Goodness gracious.”

Her fumbling and awkwardness melted into the softest places inside him and Luke couldn’t stop the laugh. “Gee, girl. Calm down. It’s not like I’m leaving forever or anything.”

Pink tinted her cheeks as she came out from behind the table, clutching the little creation in her hands.

With a glance, he realized what it was. “Is that…?” His gaze traveled from her hands up to her eyes and held there. He pushed up from the doorway and into the room. “Can I see it?”

“Oh, uh, it’s not finished yet. I just… I just started it. I haven’t even gotten all the lace pinned on it.”

Luke sensed how self-conscious she was, and it was such a change from how she normally carried herself, it fascinated him even more. “That’s okay. It doesn’t have to be perfect or anything. Can I see it?”

For a moment she wound her top lip under her teeth and arched her eyebrow. “Um.” With a shrug, a swallow, and a dip of her eyes, she held it up for his inspection, and Luke couldn’t stop the smile.

“Oh, wow. Alyssa is going to love that.” He had thought he had decided to give her space, but the little vest with the pink lace on the pockets and the sleeves drew him to it. “This is amazing.”

Sage shrank backward. “It’s not that hard. Just a little lace.”

“Yeah, but… it’s so much better like this.” Standing right in front of her, he fingered it. “That is crazy cool.”

“Th-thanks.”

Oh, lands it was hard for a girl to hang onto her heart with him so close, looking so handsome and sweet. Those eyes. Those hands. That smile. Breathing was becoming a real problem, and so was remembering he wasn’t hers and never would be. “I hope she’ll like it.”

Then his eyes bridged the divide between them and captured hers gently, refusing to let go.

Her head started spinning. If she didn’t say something quick, Sage had the crazy notion that he was going to kiss her. “Thanks… for coming… today. I didn’t expect that.”

“Yeah, well, I didn’t want you to be here all alone. I hope you didn’t mind.”

“Mind? Why would I…?”

“I thought you were leaving,” Jaycee’s voice split right through the moment like a hacksaw, and Luke spun away from Sage.

“Oh, yeah. I was. I am.” He looked from one sister to the other in panic. “I was just going to say good-bye.”

Jaycee stood there, arms crossed and a deep scowl on her face. “Well, good-bye.”

Luke glanced at Sage and put his head down. “Yeah. Okay. I’ll see you around, Sage.”

Her gaze was down too, owing mostly to the shattering of her heart. “Yeah, um, I’ll see you.”

“K.” He stood for one more second and then headed for the door, sliding past Jaycee who barely moved. “’night.”

“Yeah,” Jaycee said.

“Night,” Sage called even though she knew the brightness of her voice was a complete farce. When he was gone, she put her gaze on the carpet and headed back for the machine not wanting a confrontation if she could avoid it.

“You know,” Jaycee said, her voice low, her tone dire, “I don’t know what kind of a game you’re playing here, but stay away from Luke.”

For once the anger in Sage gave her courage, and she scowled back. “For your information, he came to see me. I didn’t invite him. I didn’t even know he was coming, but he came anyway, so if you have a problem with that, you need to take it up with him not me.”

Jaycee narrowed her eyes until they were barely slits. “Luke is a nice guy. He doesn’t deserve to be dragged through the mud for your enjoyment.”

Sometimes it was hard to comprehend how low her sister’s opinion of her really was. “You know, I could say the same about you.”

That pulled Jaycee off the doorframe. “Me? I’m not into making guys fall all over themselves so I can play pedestal girl while I make them look like idiots. Look at me. I’m so wonderful.”

“I never said that.”

“Well, you act like it.” Jaycee flipped her hair. “Look at me. I’m Ms. Perfect. Aren’t I wonderful?” She swayed her hips in case Sage missed the point.

The sword sliced into her. “I am not Ms. Perfect.”

“Thousand dollar suits. Five hundred dollar shoes. Perfect nails. Perfect hair. Yeah, you’re really slumming there.”

“I’m just trying to look my best. You should try it sometime.”

The dour look on Jaycee’s face dropped four octaves. “Stay away from Luke.” And with that, she turned and flounced out, closing the door though she barely managed not to slam the thing.

One second and Sage let out an almost scream of frustration. Why did she deserve to be attacked? She wasn’t trying to attract Luke. At least she didn’t think she was. Well, okay, a little flirting, but everybody did that.

She looked down at the little jacket in her hands. It was pointless to pursue it. Thousand dollar suits. Who was she trying to kid? Jaycee was right. No matter what she did, she would never impress these people. They played the game very differently than she had ever been taught to play it.

And Luke. This sigh hurt as it went through her heart. Jaycee was right about him too. He was a nice guy, and the last thing she wanted to do was drag him through the depths of her miserable life. She sat down at the sewing machine but only to put the little jacket down. With a shake of her head, she gave up thinking that she would ever have a chance of fitting in here. No. This place was just too different—like seeing the world through the opposite side of a mirror. Right was left, and left was right, and no matter what happened, she would never understand any of it.

All the way home through the darkness, Luke thought about Sage, about washing dishes, about sitting with her in the den. It was so incredibly strange because there were moments—fleeting but almost real—when he saw beneath the mask she wore so well. Moments when she seemed so very different from the glamorous girl who had hit their sleepy town, causing ripple effects all the way through it, the girl that Jaycee so clearly hated.

No, this girl, this “different” one, seemed much… softer, more timid and far less worldly.

He couldn’t quite get the two visions together to make the same person, and yet somehow, they did. In his own driveway, he shut off the car and just sat there, wondering which Sage would show up if he ever had the guts to ask her out. Would he get Glamour Girl or Soft Sage? With no way to answer that, and berating himself for even asking the question, he popped the door to his car and pulled himself up and out. In all likelihood, his mind said, life would never give him the chance to find out anyway. No, people as different as they were could never be destined to share the world together. The sooner he accepted that and went on with life, the better off he and everyone else would be.

Only thing was, he wished he could tell Jaycee that so she would stop looking at him like he was Satan’s first lieutenant all that time. That would be helpful.

The little jacket hadn’t moved from the side of the sewing table all week. Sage tried not to notice it as she dug into her luggage for something that wasn’t hopelessly wrinkled to wear to church the next Sunday. It had been a relatively quiet week. Luke hadn’t materialized again, and for that, she had almost convinced her heart she was thankful. He was just a nice guy, being nice. End of story.

There had been no meal the day before, and that was okay too. She had the feeling that being in the same room with Luke and Jaycee would either kill her or cause a fight she wanted no part of. Rory was probably mad, but she had no way of knowing that for sure as the only time she got to use her phone was the ten minutes at ten.

Her mother and Jason were now in Tuscany sipping wine, and Sage couldn’t help but notice how short every missive was from her mother. They were having a good time. The name of a town she’d never heard of before. What her mother had purchased or where they had stayed. Never a word about Sage. How she was. How things were going. If she was still going crazy.

She was, but apparently as long as her mother didn’t have to hear about it, everyone could be at peace with their own lives. Even her conversations with Patelyn and Mac had become shorter. Mac and Ben had broken up—something about a miscommunication in texting. Sage never quite understood the whole story, and by the time she got to ask, it was old news. So between reading, dishes, dusting and vacuuming, her week had somehow slipped by until Sunday spun around again.

The black and silver see-through gauze skirt came out of the suitcase, and she shook it out. Paired with a black top and short black skirt, it made her look taller. Especially with the boots with the spiked heels. Well, she thought as she knelt on the floor by the sewing table, she might not be the most popular person on the planet, but at least she could be the best dressed.

No matter where he went, Sage was never far from Luke’s mind. That might have been owing to the fact that every time he went to town, he had to pass their place. Whatever the reason, the thoughts were back on Sunday morning as the car knifed through the sleepy haze of the new day. At their drive, his glance betrayed him, counted the vehicles, and with only that, he knew they hadn’t headed to church yet.

They would be there of course. They always were.

Still, he wondered even as he drove on, if she would even look his way, or if had she completely forgotten their time together the week before.

Twice throughout the week, he had considered texting her, but then that would do no good at all, she didn’t even have her phone. So why did these crazy ideas keep sneaking up on him like heartache lying in wait for him to have a weak moment?

“She’s not into you, Baker. She’s not. She’s Sage Wentworth. Hollywood Glamour Girl. Get that through your head. She is way out of your league.”

For some odd reason when they got to the church, Sage’s heart rate picked up noticeably. She scanned the parking lot as she disembarked from the Mom-mobile and caught sight of the black sports car on the far side. Quickly, she dropped her gaze and let out a sigh. “Keep it cool, Sage. It’s not like that, and you know it.”

Luke was in the back, greeting those he knew when they came in. He was on deck to read this morning, and so he had chosen his best suit rather than the rag-tag ones he normally wore. The crazy thing was, he sensed her arrival rather than actually seeing it. With his hand in Mr. Fuentes’s, he felt the door open, and he froze. The smile on his face and the greeting in his throat went nowhere.

Instead of saying anything, he just nodded, knowing he looked like an idiot. Mr. Fuentes nodded as well and headed for the steps as Luke fidgeted with his jacket before forcing his gaze up. It was them all right. Her. And WOW!

The middle of his heart jerked to a complete stop, and his mouth went cotton dry. How was he ever going to look or sound coherent with her looking like that? Her hair was down in the waves again, flowing onto her shoulders which were covered in a fitted black knit top. A silver necklace stood out from the creamy skin at her neck. Those eyes, that smile, that confident way she carried herself.

Shaking his head, Luke put his gaze on his shoes, praying the vision wouldn’t land him in the floor. “Get it together, Luke. Get it together.”

“Well, Luke,” Mrs. Lawrence said, extending her hand to him, and he had to swallow to get his gaze up.

“Hello, Mrs. Lawrence.” He shook the lady’s hand, making sure to drag his gaze up to the left side of her and Jaycee rather than the right side of her and Sage. Lands, that was next to impossible. “Jaycee.”

“Hey, Luke,” Jaycee said with a smile, and she moved over to him for a hug. What had once felt so right, now felt awkward and uncomfortable. Was it hot in here to anyone else?

“Hey, Jayc. How’re you?” He pulled her in to his side and held her there.

“Awesome as usual. You?”

“Good. Good. Yeah, everything’s great.”

The hug broke, and although Luke didn’t want to be rude, he just couldn’t acknowledge Sage with the other two standing right there. In fact, his face was starting burn, and breathing was making his head swim.

“So are you reading today?” Jaycee asked. “I see you’ve got your nice duds on.”

“Oh. Uh. Yeah. Yeah. I am.”

What she had known all along was now painfully clear to Sage. Somehow she kept the smile on her face although the tears burned like fire in her eyes. Luke and Jaycee were a thing. She was invisible. All was right with the real world. It was her fantasy world that had just shattered around her.

“Okay,” Luke said with a smile, “enjoy the service.”

“K. See ya after,” Jaycee said.

Sage pulled her gaze down to the tiles and kept it there as they crossed in front of him. How could she ever have thought…?

His head jerked to the side as he felt her pain pass. But what could he do? Reach out to her? Take her in his arms and kiss the hurt—that he had caused—away? They were in church for crying out loud. He could no more do that than burn the place down, and something told him if his feelings for her ever became known, the place might spontaneously implode with all the wagging tongues.

No. It was better for all of them if he just kept his feelings to himself and dealt with it.

Halfway up the aisle, her stepmother found a pew and led them all in. Stepmother on one side, father on the other, the three kids in the middle. Sage wished with all her heart that she could sit somewhere else. Between her father and Jaycee, there was no comfortable position. Add to that, the fact that everyone behind them was staring, and comfortable was out of the realm of possibility. So she sat, chin up, back straight willing herself to be strong and get through this.

They wouldn’t get to her. No. She was Sage Wentworth, and that meant something. Even in this little po-dunk town that no one had ever heard of before.

As he went down the aisle to his seat in the front, Luke had no trouble locating them. The two sitting right next to each other could be no other. He retrained his gaze on his destination and walked right on by them. God, just get me through this without humiliating myself.

It was hard to pay attention to the service with the strong shoulders in that nice black suit just five rows ahead of her. His hair was long for a clean-cut guy, but it suited him nicely. The Roman nose, the nice smile—they played through her mind even though she couldn’t see them. Over and over, Sage told herself to stop thinking about him. Just stop, Sage. Seriously. Stop.

For one thing, they were in church, and in church you weren’t supposed to be fantasizing about some guy.

For another thing, he and Jaycee clearly had a thing going, or would if Jaycee would wake up and realize what an awesome guy he was, which was bound to happen sooner or later. Even Jaycee couldn’t be that blind or dumb.

Sage was getting really good at listing all the reasons her heart should just be reasonable about this whole thing when suddenly, he stood up and went to the little stand with the microphone. He opened the book there, adjusted the microphone, and looked out across the crowd.

Oh, those eyes!  Why did he have to be so incredible? Heat flooded her body, and she had to yank her gaze down onto her lap to keep from making a complete fool of herself. The worst part was, he wasn’t just handsome. He was sensitive and funny and kind….

“Our reading today comes from First Corinthians 13.” Luke hadn’t bargained on Pastor Steve choosing this particular Bible passage, and it took a breath to get his eyes to focus and the words to start coming out. “Love.” He paused on the word, thinking this truly was unfair for them to ask him to do, but he gathered up his courage and continued, “is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.”

His gaze came up and swept across those seated there listening but never dared to stop for even a second. “It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

“Love never fails.” Never was a strong word, and he had to breathe that one down. “But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when completeness comes, what is in part disappears. When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me.” Oh, for that to be the truth. “For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.”

He took a breath and let it out slowly. “And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.”

Against the ruler of perfect love, his looked rather pitiful, and he asked for forgiveness for that as he retook his seat. Then he stood with everyone else for the reading of the Gospel.

Sage felt like she was drowning in his words. Okay. They weren’t his words exactly, but spoken by him, they could well have been his words. Love does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking. The picture of him elbow-deep in dishwater, helping on the line, cutting up food, helping, helping, helping rushed over her.

No, he didn’t puff himself up. He was humble in a way she wondered if she had ever really seen anyone be before.

Pastor Steve took over at the podium then, and she tried to force her mind from the memory of Luke.

“The Gospel today is from the Book of Luke,” Pastor Steve said, and Sage almost laughed out loud. Did he have to be in every single thought?

“Now on his way to Jerusalem, Jesus traveled along the border between Samaria and Galilee. As he was going into a village, ten men who had leprosy met him. They stood at a distance and called out in a loud voice, ‘Jesus, Master, have pity on us!’  When he saw them, he said, ‘Go, show yourselves to the priests.’ And as they went, they were cleansed.

“One of them, when he saw he was healed, came back, praising God in a loud voice. He threw himself at Jesus’ feet and thanked him—and he was a Samaritan. Jesus asked, ‘Were not all ten cleansed? Where are the other nine? Has no one returned to give praise to God except this foreigner?’ Then he said to him, ‘Rise and go; your faith has made you well.’”

A moment and he closed the book. Everyone sat down, including Sage who was again aware of just how much distance her father and her sister were able to put between themselves and her. She wondered if others could tell, if they could see it as much as she could feel it.

Venturing out, she glanced over at her father and smiled softly. It did no good because he was only looking straight ahead, his arms crossed. Her smile fell into melancholy as she retrained her gaze to the front and brushed the long strand of waves from her eyes. She fought not to be frustrated, not to be hurt, but it wasn’t working very well. Why was she so unacceptable, so invisible to everyone?

“Lepers,” Pastor Steve started, and Sage put her gaze on him, trying very hard not to sigh out her frustration or burst into tears. Neither would do any good of course. They would just take her feelings and twist them to somehow mean she was a stuck-up snob, which, then again, maybe she was.

Her gaze started bouncing around the church, from her fingernails to the windows and back again. She thought back as if her mind was going a million miles an hour to Luke washing those dishes, cooking, helping. That was so innate in him and so very foreign to her.

“Ten of them,” Pastor Steve continued. “Ten lepers from Samaria. A foreign country. The outcasts of society. These were men who lived out in the caves because they had nowhere else to go. They were not allowed to be anywhere near the city, and definitely not near the Temple. They had been disconnected from everything and everyone because of this disease, for months or maybe even years. Dying a slow, painful unavoidable death. And then they hear about Jesus coming, and for once, they have a small ray of hope. Hope that someone might hear their pain and help them.”

Her thoughts went to those who came for the meals on Saturdays. They were like the lepers too. Not from a foreign country but maybe from a foreign lifestyle. No food in the pantry, no money to buy whatever they wanted at the grocery store. She’d never really thought about it like that, or thought about them either until now. Yes, maybe her family had a point about her being a selfish snob. Maybe she was.

“And look at what Jesus does. He stretches out his hand and He heals all ten of them. Now of course, we see the physical healing of these ten, and that was amazing and powerful. But I want you to think for a moment about the psychological, societal, and spiritual healing that came with this act of Jesus. What is the first thing He says to them? ‘Go show yourselves to the priests in the Temple.’”

Pastor Steve paused and looked out across them. “‘Go show yourselves to the priests in the Temple.’ In other words, ‘Go to the ones who have cast you out. Go and reconnect to society. Go and show what God has done in your life.’ And they did, and they were healed, and one of them came back to say thanks. I wonder sometimes if we really hear that. I know there are sermons preached about being the one who comes back, and that’s great. But I want you today to take a real look at the love you are giving out.

“From the reading that Brother Luke broke open earlier, ‘Real love is patient. Real love is kind. It is not self-seeking. It rejoices with the truth.’” He put his hands on either side of the podium and swayed for a second. “Have you ever helped someone out only to get kicked in the teeth in return? Have you ever loved someone and gotten nothing for your effort or gotten hurt for it? Have you ever been an outcast and ground the good that was done for you into the dirt? Why?

“Have you ever asked that? Why are we not grateful when someone helps? Why do we get defensive when someone reaches out a hand? And why do we cast people out in the first place?”

“Oh, it’s easy to listen to this Gospel, but it’s so much harder to live what Jesus is teaching us today. How to be there for the outcasts, how to bring them back into communion with God and the church, how to lift others up and really love them how they need to be loved—with a love that is patient with their failings and their fears, with a love that offers no matter what it gets back, with a love that’s grounded in faith that heals people inside and out.

“Instead, how often are we quick to judge, quick to believe the worst, quick to cast people out and hope they stay in the caves so we don’t have to deal with their humanity? But today, brothers and sisters, Jesus is calling us to a greater kind of love, a love that welcomes the outcasts and loves them where they are. A love that helps people reconnect and come into fellowship. A love that doesn’t judge and have agendas and hoops they have to jump through to be worthy of our love. A love that loves people where they are not where we might wish them to be. A love that loves them as they are not like we’d like for them to be.

“We need to become a people that has the courage and conviction to reach out to the outcasts in our world and through the love of God in us heal and help them, not cut off and cast out. And we need to do this with a love that doesn’t focus on what it gets back in return, with a love that keeps loving through the trials and the turmoil all the way into healing. So that all people might be reconnected to the God that loves them so very, very much. May we all today, ask for Jesus to help us to become a people of real love to the world around us. Amen.”

“Amen.”

After the service Sage knew enough to know it was best if she made herself scarce. Keeping her gaze down, she exited the main part of the church and went over into the little corner by the reception table and the fireplace. It was a corner. It was safe there. Safe from the disapproving gazes of the other church-goers. Safe from the ever-present dangers lurking by any one of her family members. Safe from having to have her heart smashed by seeing Luke and Jaycee together. Yes, this little, dark corner was far, far better than being out there in the real world.

Luke exited the double doors and bounced down the steps, not really noticing them. With one glance and only that, he surveyed the situation and asked God again why this had to be so complicated. As usual, Jaycee was on one side, and Sage was over by the desk, only this time she wasn’t out in front of it. In fact, if you didn’t think to look for her, you might even miss that she was there.

He hated that, hated how invisible she tried to be. He was beginning to get a glimpse of why that was, but it was oh, so very wrong in a way that he couldn’t quite put into words. However, even he didn’t have the guts to go over there. That would be far too obvious, and the last thing he wanted was to draw attention to himself talking to Sage.

So instead, he talked with Ben for a few minutes and then Gabe who was back for a few weeks with his mom. They were okay guys and good reasons to not pursue what his heart said he should. Then, eventually, the crowd dissipated, and before he really had much of a chance to talk with either of the girls, they were gone. He breathed out a sigh of exasperation at his own lack of bravery, shook his head, and pushed out of the church. Might as well head on out to his grandmother’s. The family was gathering for his grandfather’s birthday.

As her father drove out of the parking lot, Sage glanced up and her gaze fused to him coming out of the door there under the little awning. Luke. Luke Baker. A guy so far out of her reach she might as well be in California. It hurt to rake in the breath and even more to let it out slowly so no one heard the slow cracking of her heart. Let it go, Sage. Please. Just let it go.

“Gregory and Emily had that girl in church with them again this morning,” Luke’s grandmother was saying when he slipped in through the back door and into the kitchen. “I’ve never seen clothes so tight on a body. When did modesty go out of style?”

Stealthily, Luke made his way across the kitchen, hoping and praying they wouldn’t really notice him.

“Emily is just beside herself,” his mother said, tossing vegetables into a pot. “Did you know that she had Rory Harris take her to a drinking party in Greely?”

“Rory Harris?” his grandmother said. “Is that James and Kim’s boy?”

“Yes.” His mother shook her head. “I just hate the thought that that girl would come in here and drag the others down with her.”

Luke breathed down the tirade he wanted to launch at both of them. How dare they run Sage into the ground? And she took Rory? That was rich. He wondered how many other horrible stories his mother had been collecting from Sage’s stepmom, and then he wondered why her stepmom would be spreading such vicious things about her own stepdaughter.

“Oh, Luke,” his grandmother said, her face brightening. “Can you get the bread out of the freezer in the garage? I don’t think I brought enough in.”

“Sure, Grandma.” It wasn’t what he wanted to say, but it was the most diplomatic thing he could. He strode back out of the back door, banging it against the wall, which felt good. The heat of anger coursed through him, and he wondered where she was. Holed up in her room? Sitting in the den by herself? While the whole world dragged her reputation through the mud.

And he wasn’t a stitch better. He had outright ignored her at church. Sure, there were reasons not to go overboard, but to not even say, “Hi”? What kind of a friend did that? “A big chicken. That’s who.” Grabbing another bag of bread out of the freezer, he went back into the house, being just careful enough not to bang the door this time.

“I think her going back to California would be better for everyone,” his mother said. “It’s not like she fits in here. I mean those boots she had on today at church could have fed half the community for a month.”

“Here you go,” Luke said and put the bread down.

“Oh, thank you, love. Your grandpa is in the living room. Why don’t you go watch the Sox with him? He would love that.”

Great. Why not?

With the family all home, the only place Sage could be was her room. It was getting smaller by the day. She had read four books from the little library in the den and had absconded with a fiction book about a rancher and his sweetheart. It was depressing.

Everyone else got to have a life, and here she was—stuck in this room because she didn’t dare venture out. Out there, there were dishes to be done and other nefarious things she didn’t even want to contemplate like taking out the trash and vacuuming dust bunnies from under every piece of furniture in the house. She felt like Cinderella without the ball, the glass slippers, and Prince Charming.

Well, okay. Rory would come close to Prince Charming if he hadn’t already forgotten about her. By the time the hero and heroine in the book kissed, Sage was throwing herself a good, old-fashioned pity party. Closing the book without even finishing it, she was surprised that her thoughts tumbled not to Rory but to Luke. She wondered what he was doing today.

At church he had made it perfectly clear that he had no interest in her, and strangely, that hurt worse than any snub she’d ever received, and that included her family and the people of the town. So what did she care if he knew she was on the planet or not?

However, even as she lay there, she realized that she did care. A lot. And that scared her more than she would ever in her lifetime admit to anyone.

“Well, if it isn’t my baby brother.” Hannah was on the couch beside him before Luke knew she was in the room.

“Hey, sis. You slummin’ again?”

She laughed. “Trying not to starve to death. All I’ve had in a week is Ramen noodles.” Picking up the pillow, she held it to her. “What’ve you been up to these days?”

He grinned. “No good as usual.”

With a tilt of her head, she eyed him. “You ask Jaycee out yet?”

Luke groaned and closed his eyes. “Seriously. Is that all you girls ever think about?”

“Like you don’t.”

Unfortunately she had a point, and it stuck for too long in his throat.

“Ahh,” Hannah said, knowingly.

But he shook his head. “No. Don’t go there.”

“Mom said you were over at her house the other night—eating supper with the family.”

Somehow he squelched this groan, but it roared through his spirit just the same. “They asked me to stay. I didn’t want to be rude.”

“So the family likes you.” Hannah bounced her eyebrows, and Luke was having a very hard time keeping his heart from jumping out of his chest at the thought of not Jaycee but Sage standing at that sink. No lying over dishes. With only a nod, every cell in him would’ve had him up and headed back to her. Instead he sighed and shook his head.

“Those romance novels are getting to your head,” he said as if the very thought was distasteful.

“Maybe you should try a little romance. It couldn’t hurt.”

Actually, it could. A lot.

Chapter 13

Back home just after dark, Luke lay down on his bed and stared at the ceiling. He really did feel bad about ignoring Sage at church. She probably hated him by now, and he didn’t blame her. Thinking things through, he finally decided that he should at least text her so she wouldn’t completely think he was a jerk.

Carefully he twisted and retrieved the little device from his back pocket and switched it on. No texts or calls. Not that he was surprised. That’s how life was for him.

One slow word at a time mostly because his heart was being extra careful about what he said to her, he typed in his message and hit SEND. Then he let the little phone fall to his chest. “God, please don’t let her hate me.”

At ten-‘til-ten with all dishes done and put away, Sage was given her phone for the allotted ten minutes. Not that she would need that long. Except for her mother and the occasional missive from Patelyn, her online life had shrunk to about as small as her real life had.

She took it to her room and turned it on. The little music didn’t do to her spirit what it used to. Now it just reminded her of all she had lost. Fingering the screen, she was one swipe away from going across the message when she stopped, lowered her gaze at it, and frowned.

Luke? What was he texting her for?

Not sure she was going to like this, she touched it like it might explode and read the short message.

Hey, Sage. Sorry about church. I’m an idiot. Hope you’re not mad. Just wondering how the jacket is coming.

Her head jerked up, and her eyes saw the little jacket. It still hadn’t moved.

Pulling up her sanity and self-esteem, she typed a reply back slowly.

Luke was rearranging things on his desk when the cell phone vibrated. He reached for it and in one swipe had it on. Sage! His heart jumped and then twisted painfully when he read her message.

Yeah, well, I’m getting kind of used to it. Haven’t worked on the jacket. Hope you still have the Legos.

Worry and panic snaked through him. He knew he’d messed up, but it was the other melancholy notes he heard in her message that really got to him.

Her sigh was hard when his message came in. He didn’t want to talk to her in public. Now he wanted to? That hurt almost as much as church had.

I’m soooo sorry. I know you’re going through a lot. I shouldn’t have been a jerk.

As much as she wanted to be mad at him, all she saw when she thought about him saying that was the sadness and worry in those gentle eyes.

It was hard not to text her back when she didn’t reply right away, and Luke prayed he hadn’t messed up so badly she wouldn’t forgive him. Finally her message came in.

It’s not you. It’s me. I just seem to have that effect on people around here. Don’t worry about it.

This was getting worse. All he wanted to do was go over there and give her a hug. It was amazing how far three-quarters of a mile felt. His thumbs tip-tapped out his reply.

Please don’t say that. You’re amazing.

Uh. Huh. Yeah. I’m sooo amazing. Woohoo. Crazy thing is, I used to think that… a long, long time ago.

The idea of going over there was all-but overwhelming his sanity.

Listen to me, Sage. All this junk is just people being jealous and being idiots about stuff. Please don’t let what’s happened make you lose your confidence.

She considered not being honest, laughing it off, saying something goofy, but somehow, with him honesty was always what came out.

I think it’s too late for that.

Before he had a chance to reply, she typed in, Gotta go. Take care, and don’t worry about me. I’ll get through it. G’night.

All-out panic flooded through him, and his fingers went into overdrive.

Sage!

Wait.

Don’t leave.

Hey, can we talk about this?

Please.

Don’t go.

Sage?

Sage…?

He put the phone onto the desk and stared at it as his fingers raked up and into his hair. She was gone, and there wasn’t one single thing he could do about that.

As insane as it was, Sage thought about those messages all night. Tossing one way, she would consider that he really meant them, the other way she was sure he was just being a nice guy. Berating herself for believing it could be anything more and then wishing that it could be, she spent the entire night one small step away from letting her world collapse into the tears that were intent on dragging her under and never letting her go.

By nine in the morning, Luke couldn’t take it anymore. He had to see her, had to make sure she was all right. So he came up with the lame excuse of returning the Lawrences’ floor fan. It had been in the garage ever since the Prom the year before when he had borrowed it for the billowing waves “Under the Sea.”

Now was as good of a time as any to take it back.

He tried to load it in the back of his car and then remembered they had tried this back in April. “Fine.”

Going back in the house, he yelled for his mom. “I’m taking the truck!”

She came around the corner. “Where’re you off to?”

He lifted the thing awkwardly. “Thought I’d return this so they don’t think I’m a thief.”

His mother smiled. “Take your time. It’s going to be pretty boring around here today.”

That was exactly what he was hoping for.

“I’m late!” Jaycee raced through the kitchen, grabbing her duffle bag off the floor.

“You don’t want…” her mother called as the back door banged, “breakfast?” She let the bowl down onto the counter and then put it back into the cabinet. “Guess not.” With a sigh, she turned to where Ryder sat, inhaling his cereal. “You about ready there, Champ? If we don’t get a move on, we’re going to be late for your swim lessons.”

Sage sat at the table too, beginning to wonder if she really had become invisible. Jaycee was off to basketball camp; Ryder had swimming; her father was gone as usual. The only good thing she could say about the day was that at least she wouldn’t be trapped in her room.

“Get your things. We need to be going,” her stepmother said to Ryder, and he jumped up and left. “Sage, are you coming?”

“Uh, I don’t think so. I’ve got to do the dishes.” Finally. Finally, that had come in handy.

Her stepmother sighed. “All right, but we won’t be back until later. I’m needing to pick up some things after his lesson.”

“Oh, that’s okay. I’m sure I can entertain myself.” Somehow she got the bubbles back into her voice. She had been working very hard to do that around her stepmother. That way, maybe, she would have mercy on her and let her have her life back.

“Suit yourself. Ryder! Let’s go already!”

As Luke made the turn into their driveway, he considered what would happen if her family was there. It would be tough enough to talk with her if they weren’t, if they were…

However, at the turn he met Mrs. Lawrence coming the other direction. At the apex of the turn, she stopped and so did he. He rolled down his window, hoping to see if Sage was in the vehicle. If she was, his plan was about to disintegrate. “Oh, hey,” he said brightly, fighting to figure out who was in there and who wasn’t without being obvious. “I’m finally bringing your floor fan back.”

“Oh.” Mrs. Lawrence smiled. “You can just set it in the back door. Greg can put it away when he gets home tonight.”

“Will do,” he said, realizing he had no prayer of getting a head-count. She wasn’t in the front, but the back windows were too dark to tell anything.

“Well, we’re off to swimming. Have a great day!”

“You too,” he called and then negotiated the turn around her. Once in the driveway, he rolled up his window and surveyed the area where they usually parked. No cars. With a sigh, he knew his plan had just gone poof in front of his eyes. Great. Now to come up with something different when he got another chance.

Sage was at the table just finishing up her own breakfast of poached eggs. They were easier to make than Eggs Benedict, and the truth was, they weren’t too bad. However, when she heard the car door slam outside, she squelched the sigh as she stood to gather her dishes. Monster Stepmother was back. Fabulous.

Luke went to the back of the pickup and hauled the heavy fan up and out. Manual labor. It was good for some things; however, clearing his head of thoughts of her was not one of them. He headed to the house, lugging the thing in front of him, not at all surprised that they would leave the house open. No one out here locked houses up because it was too likely that another family member wouldn’t remember their key. His mind was still categorizing what new excuse he could come up with tonight as he traipsed to the back door.

Utter panic zipped through Sage when she glanced out the window over the sink only to find a pickup she didn’t recognize in the driveway rather than her stepmom’s van. Fear pinged into the panic when she heard noise at the back door. Had they locked the door when they left? She hadn’t thought to ask, and now she was out here all alone!

Figuring she’d better at least try to defend herself, she grabbed a large chef’s butcher knife from the wooden block and positioned it in her hand. A loud thump at the back door made her jump like a bunny rabbit. “Settle down, Sage. Settle down,” she breathed, inching her way to the door frame. Maybe whoever it was would just leave.

Instead, she heard them come right into the back door. Every footstep they took was like an explosion in her spirit. The next thump when she was only a foot away from the door nearly sent the knife in her hand skittering, and she let out a squeak before she could pull it back. Instantly the noise in the next room stopped.

“Hello. Is someone here?” the voice asked, jolting her fraying nerves into scatter-and-run mode.

With all the cars gone, it made no sense that anyone besides him was in the house, but the hairs on the back of Luke’s neck told him he wasn’t alone. “Hey? It’s Luke Baker. Who’s here?”

Luke Baker? The name screamed through Sage, and her eyes went wide in horror. What in the world was he doing here? And walking right into the house like that? Who did that?

“Who’s…?” In the next second he breached the doorway, and Sage let out a squeal of surprise and terror. “Whoa!” Luke stopped in one breath and held up both hands. “Sage? What are you doing?”

The adrenaline rushing through her lifted the knife a bit higher. “I could ask you the same thing.”

Luke let out a small laugh more of fear than mirth. “Uh, I’m returning the Lawrences’ floor fan.” He glanced back out from where he had come. “I didn’t think anyone was here.”

A moment and finally, Sage began to get sanity to overtake the fear. “Well, that would be two of us.”

He arched an eyebrow. “You any good with that thing?”

She tipped her head. “I could be if I had to.”

With several quick nods, he looked right at her. “I don’t doubt that.”

The breath out felt good. The one in felt even better, and Sage laughed softly as she lowered the knife. “Man, you about scared me to death, you big oaf.”

“Me?” He put his fingers on his chest. “Hey, I’m not the one wielding a machete here. You know, I’m beginning to think you take this Hollywood thing a little too seriously.”

“Ha. Ha.” Sage went back into the kitchen and put the knife in the block, annoyed with her overdramatic imagination. Who would have come all the way out here to hurt her? “I don’t know where that floor whatever goes.”

“Oh, that’s okay. Mrs. Lawrence said to just put it in the back door.” He followed her into the kitchen and put his hand up on the cabinet over the counter. “If I’d have known I was going to face a knife fight, I think I’d have left it on the back step.”

At the sink Sage started the water and rubbed her dish off, suddenly feeling very self-conscious with him standing right there watching her. Lands, that guy had a presence to him that shook her to the core, and she could tell he wasn’t even trying to make her crazy. “So what’s up with the pickup? Your car in the shop?”

“Nah. It’s my dad’s. The floor fan was too big for my trunk.”

“Ah.” She lifted her chin and nodded once. Fighting to act like this was all completely normal, she went back to the table and retrieved Ryder’s bowl and spoon. “Well, I’m sure you were wanting to see Jaycee, but she’s not here. Some basketball something or another.”

“Oh.” With that, he came over to the cabinet to her left, leaned there and crossed his arms. “Actually, I was kind of hoping we could talk.”

Sage’s heart jerked painfully at that. “Oh, yeah? About what?”

She was good, but Luke was learning. He knew how easily she could hide under that sweet voice and the all-is-right-with-the-world mask. A moment and he leaned his head down to get a better view of her.

“About last night and why you disappeared.”

Her reply took a breath that he saw and felt. “Oh, yeah, that. Well, I only get ten minutes.” She shrugged, her head down, her gaze only on the bowl. “Grounded and all that.”

“Yeah.” Luke lifted his chin and lowered it as his gaze took her in. So many teeny tiny red flags, and yet they were hardly visible at all. “And before?”

“Before?” Her gaze came up to his, and he read every vulnerable thing she was not saying in them.

“Before.” Gently, carefully, he took the bowl that was still in her hand and placed it in the second sink. Her eyes never left his as he turned off the water and took her hand. The thought that she might start crying raked right across his heart, and he hated how torn up she looked. “Listen to me, Sage, all of this junk is not your fault.”

With that her gaze fell, and she twisted her neck down and sniffed.

“Seriously. You have to know that.” His fingers brushed the waves at her temple back.

Sniffing again, her gaze was harder when it came back up to his. “Look.” Her eyes fluttered with the weight of the unshed tears. “You’re a nice guy. It’s like Jaycee said, I’m kryptonite. Everything I touch implodes. I think you need to be smart and stay away.”

However, that was no longer an option. “What if I don’t want to stay away?”

For the second time in an hour, panic flooded through her spirit as he leaned toward her. “Luke!” she said as the panic surged into her voice. Not wanting to, she backed up, away from his all-encompassing presence, away from the feelings dragging her the other way into his arms and his kiss and him. “I… I… can’t.” Sage shook her head, wishing her thoughts would make any sense. “I’m going with Rory, remember?”

The statement was like a punch to the gut, but in one fell-swoop, Luke remembered nothing else—unless you counted, what she felt like, and how she smelled this morning, and how she looked in the sunlight streaming in through the window.

“I know what you must think of me,” she said in a voice that quaked, her eyes wild with unreadable words. “But I’m not like that… I’m not.”

Horror punched into him, and Luke blinked back the desire he’d almost let overcome him. “Sage, I….”

“No,” she said firmly. “I’m not going to do this. I’m not going to let you get dragged through the mud because of me.” With half-a-yank, she disengaged from his grip. “I’m not.” She was shaking her head, backing away from him, and Luke realized he was going to lose her completely if he didn’t get himself together.

He swallowed all of his feelings down and let out a breath. “Look, Sage. I’m not…” He let out another breath. “I’m not trying to pressure you or whatever. That’s not even why I came.”

Confusion knifed through her eyes. “Why did you come? Why are you here?”

“I…” How could he put any of this into words? How much he wanted her—yes, like that but so much more. To protect her. To shield her from all the junk. To pull her to him and never let her go. Corralling everything else, he lowered his gaze at her. “Okay.” He put up both hands as if letting her know he was unarmed. “I… That was stupid, and I apologize. I didn’t come here to… whatever. Seduce you or make a move on you or anything like that.”

This was getting worse. He slammed his eyes closed and yanked in a hard breath. When he was calmer, he opened his eyes and looked at her wary stance. Licking his lip, he gathered his scattered emotions and held them down. “I just wanted to make sure you’re okay, that’s all. Last night, when you said that about how you don’t think you’re amazing…”

Her gaze fell to the floor.

“No, Sage.” Knowing he might tank the whole thing so taking it very slowly, Luke stepped over to her. “You’re not… you’re not like everyone thinks. I don’t think you’re even like what you think.”

Sad bemusement looked up at him, but it didn’t throw Luke from the sincerity.

“Everyone has this idea that you’re some high-and-mighty, arrogant Hollywood type who is all shallow and stuff, but I don’t think it’s like that at all.”

Sage half-shrugged. “Yep. I’m a snob.”

But Luke shook his head. “I don’t think so. I think that’s what you think and that’s what everybody else thinks, but I don’t think that’s what’s really going on here.”

“Oh, yeah?” she challenged, looking right at him. “What do you think is going on here?”

Then it became the easiest thing in the world to hold her gently with his gaze. “I think you’re playing Hollywood because that’s what everybody else expects, and I think you’re very, very good at it. But I’ve seen that look in your eye—the one that says how hurt you are when people judge you for that or hurt you because of it.”

Her chin jutted out as if she was preparing to defend herself. “Maybe that’s just who I am.”

“Is it? Is it really?” A moment and he pulled her over to the table so they could sit down. Once in the chairs, he realized he’d lost her gaze again. “Sage?”

“Yeah,” but her gaze stayed on the floor.

“Sage, look at me. Please?”

She didn’t want to. Part of her said she couldn’t. Finally she clamped determination that he wouldn’t get any closer over everything else and dragged her gaze up to his. However, once locked there, she swallowed because staring at him like this was intimidating to the nth degree.

“Now look,” he said gently. “I know how being in this town can be. I know all about how people talk and the petty and truly mean things they can say and do.”

For a second she almost let her gaze waver enough to lose his, but she wasn’t going to be weak and let him think he was getting to her. That was dangerous because nobody, nobody knew the fears and frustrations that lurked in her heart, and nobody was ever going to either.

“I can only imagine what you’ve heard, what you’ve felt since you got here,” he continued. “But you have to know, that’s not about you. That’s about people having nothing better to do than to gossip and shred people they don’t understand.”

“But…”

“No. Sage, hear me out.” He shook his head but never let go of her eyes. “They are trying to tear you down because they think you think you’re better than them. They think you’re fair game because someone with your kind of life doesn’t have feelings. But you do. I know you do because I see those feelings every time I look in your eyes.”

Yes. Now he was definitely getting too close. “It’s all right,” she squeezed out. “Really. Maybe they’re just good judges of character.”

The flash of anger she saw in his eyes startled her.

“Don’t do that,” he said with heat in the words. “Don’t run yourself down because some other idiots are jealous.”

“Yeah, but…” She shrugged. “What if they’re right? About all of it? About me, about what I am?” Standing, she went over to the sink. A moment, a breath, and then she decided that being brutally honest with him was the only way she was going to get him to leave, which was what was best for everyone. “Look, when I was back home, I was exactly what they all think. Exactly. I had money, and if you didn’t, I didn’t want anything to do with you.”

She spun and leaned on the sink, needing to see herself hurting him so she could give up these ridiculous feelings. If he saw her for who she really was, he would leave, and she could go on, knowing he was free of the selfishness of her life. “If you didn’t have a bank account, you didn’t matter to me or to anyone else I hung out with. I didn’t care about anyone’s feelings. And I really didn’t care what you thought of me because I was fabulous, and who cared what you thought anyway?”

Now that she was going, she couldn’t stop. “Everything was about the next handbag and who got invited to what party. I was a snob, and I liked it that way. It was easier.”

E-gads! What had she just said, and why had she said it?

“Easier?” he asked, homing in on the one word she wanted to erase from the record of history. “Easier… how?”

Sage slammed her eyes closed, wishing she could turn that clock back one second. She’d been doing so well. She could see it in his eyes. He was beginning to hate her. Now what?

“Sage?” Luke stood. She felt it. “What do you mean easier?”

And then he was right in front of her again, so close she could reach out and touch him without even trying.

Fighting to gather up her courage and resolve, she dared to look up at him. “Look, I know, you’ve lived here all your life, and you have no idea what it’s like out there, but trust me, sometimes, it’s easier not to get close to people. If they think you’re better than them, and you think you’re better than them, it’s easier to keep them at a distance so…”

His eyes held her with the gentlest touch she’d ever experienced. “You don’t get hurt.”

Oh, how she wanted to rip her gaze from his. It hurt something fierce to let him see what she knew he was seeing.

A moment and he moved to her again. “Come here.”

And before she knew what was happening, his arms were around her. Strong. Solid. Stable. Holding her like she had never been held before. Pain started gushing up from the depths of her soul, and she fought to breathe through all of it. Why was he here? And why was he holding her like this? The feeling made her swimmy headed in the extreme.

Just as her body began to let go of the defensiveness and fear, she heard the tires crunch on the gravel outside, and reality flooded back over her. Yanking herself from his embrace, she swiped at her eyes, fighting to get her willpower to find its grip again.

“Sage?” he asked with a husky timbre to the syllable.

“No,” she said solidly. “It’s okay. Really. I’m okay. I am.” She wrapped her arms over themselves at her chest. “Really. You should go.”

The back door slammed, and Sage’s worst nightmare came around the corner. Jaycee took one look at them, and her face fell into a deep scowl. “Luke? What’re you doing here?”

It was her only defense, and she had one shot to make Jaycee believe it. Snapping happy and light over her voice, Sage stepped forward. “Luke was just returning the… what was it again? The floor thingy.”

Stunned to the core, Luke looked down at her. “The floor fan.”

How could she do that like that? How could she morph so instantaneously into someone he barely even recognized?

“The floor fan.” She giggled. “My bad.” She rolled her eyes. “I knew it had something to do with a floor.” This giggle was even higher pitched. “I was going to show him where to put it, but I’d hate for Dad to not be able to find it.” Sticking her hands in her back pockets, she raised her shoulders. “You know me? Always messing everything up.”

“Oh.” The scowl slipped from Jaycee’s face. “Well, I can show you. He usually keeps it in the garage. Remember, I was there when you borrowed it?”

“Oh…. Y-yeah.” He stumbled through the words, trying desperately not to look at Sage. “Of course. I remember. Can you show me?”

“Sure. No problem.” When Jaycee turned, there was only a split second of time for him to look at Sage.

She looked up at him, smiled a sad, soft smile and then let her gaze plummet to the tiles. With everything in him, Luke hated that look.

Sage made sure she was in her room with the door closed by the time they came back. She wanted no part of seeing the two of them together. Her life already felt like an out-of-control roller coaster, and she was starting to feel a little queasy from it. What was that anyway? Luke just showing up out of nowhere.

She bit back the laugh at nearly stabbing him. It might have served him right, after all, if she wasn’t missing her guess he had almost kissed her. That moment perplexed her more than any other she had ever lived through. If he was such a nice guy, why did he come when no one was home and hit on her? But then that moment melted into simply being in his arms, and her tired spirit said it didn’t care why he had come or what his ulterior motives might have been. It was just nice to have a friend to lean on.

Of course it couldn’t last. It already hadn’t. Now he was with Jaycee, and she was back to being invisible. Life made so much sense.

When they came back into the kitchen from putting the fan in the garage, Luke didn’t miss how empty it was. He was having trouble keeping his thoughts in the present reality rather than drifting off on the memory of holding her.

“So,” Jaycee said, pulling sandwich fixings from the refrigerator, “hard to believe we’re already almost halfway through the summer. You going to the fireworks on Sunday?”

He felt like he’d been living them for the last 24 hours. “Probably.” He took a chip from the bag and bit into it. “You?”

“Of course. I’m hoping Aaron might come. He said he’s thinking about it.”

“Aaron?” Luke sat down diagonal from her and picked up another chip, hoping his interest sounded interested and not jealous.

“From Greely. He was at the pool party the other night.” She stuck the knife in the mayonnaise and put some on the bread. “You want some?”

“Oh. Uh. No thanks. I’d better be getting on home. I wasn’t supposed to be gone this long.”

“Sure you don’t want to stay? I got salami.”

Luke stood, knowing his heart couldn’t take any more. “Nah. But you enjoy.”

They made a bit more chit-chat and then he excused himself, being very careful not to move his head when he looked the direction of Sage’s room. She was in there. He was almost sure of it. But what to do about that or her was beyond his ability to comprehend anything.

When Sage turned her phone on at quarter-to-ten, she was trying to tell herself there would be no message, and there wasn’t a message. There were five.

I know you don’t have your phone. When you do, let me know.

I don’t care what time it is. When you get your phone, text me.

Been thinking about you and praying for you all day. Please text so I know you’re okay.

Half a smile went through at that one. He really was sweet.

I promise I’m not a stalker. Just wondering how you are.

It’s 9:30. I’m here. Waiting. In case you were wondering….

She was beginning to.

Luke nearly dropped the phone when it dinged. He’d been holding it for fifteen minutes in case it rang, and he didn’t hear it. One jolt and his heart started beating again.

I’m here. Only got 10. What’s up?

Well, wondering how you are, how the rest of your day was, if you’ve been working on the jacket, what book you’re reading…

Day was okay. Not much to report. No jacket. Not enough inspiration. Some book about a girl who fell in love with a rancher. I think it’s about a billion years old though.

So many questions. So little time. His thumbs typed at the speed of light.

So do girls really read that stuff? It always seems so contrived to me.

You’ve read romances?

My mom used to have them around. I tried to read one once. Too much drama for me. And what’s up with them not kissing until like the last page anyway?

HAHA. I like the drama when it’s not my life we’re talking about, and they’re called ROMANCE novels for a REASON.

What does that mean?

It means us girls like a little romance and getting to know each other first.

So by “romance” you mean…?

I don’t know. Walking hand-in-hand on the beach, cuddling under the stars, falling in love. I know boring and old-fashioned. Sue me.

Not sure boring and old-fashioned is such a bad thing. I think sometimes we go so fast with everything that it’s here and gone before we have a chance to enjoy it.

You’ve got a point there. Give me a guy who will hold my hand and just enjoy being with me any day…. Oh, gotta go. See ya sometime!

And she hit SEND and sighed. Luke Baker was definitely one of the nicest guys she had ever known. It was too bad they would never make a real connection, not one that could last anyway. No. In a little over a month, she would be back in California living life as she had always known it. Strangely, that now sounded like a death sentence.

Chapter 14

Every day Luke would send her two or three texts throughout the day even though he knew she wouldn’t get them until around ten o’clock. Then they’d have a few minutes to talk. Most of the conversations were goofy, light-hearted, meaningless. He hadn’t forgotten what they had talked about that day in the kitchen, and he vowed there would come a time when they would talk again. But over texts for ten minutes, he chose not to get into that.

Thursday night, July 1, he was waiting by the desk when the cell buzzed. In one heartbeat he had it in hand.

Good news. It’s finished.

Finished? Worry course through him.

What is finished?

The jacket dummy. I finished it this afternoon. It turned out cute. Only problem is, now I want one.

Luke laughed at that. He was glad she sounded happy.

When do I get to see it?

You could swing by in the morning if you want. Ryder’s got swim, and Jaycee’s got basketball.

It surprised him that she would even suggest it.

You sure that would be okay?

You’re just stopping by to pick it up. It’s not eloping. And…

And…?

Tomorrow I’m FINALLY sprung! I can’t believe it. Two weeks. I thought I was going to die.

And yet, here you are.

Here I am. So does life still exist outside of these four walls?

I think so. I’m almost positive. So did the rancher get the girl?

Yeah. Great kiss at the end too.

Luke shook his head. He loved her sense of humor.

I’ll have to take your word for it.

It was silly, goofy even, but Sage loved teasing him. She glanced over at the little jacket and sighed. So are you coming tomorrow?

I’ll be there.

Long after she stopped texting, Luke lay in his bed thinking about her, about the situation, about the coming morning and the coming evening. There was another bonfire, and she would almost assuredly be with Rory. That cut in ways he didn’t think possible. Yes, he had liked Jaycee, and yes, that hurt too. But not like this.

Although he had been around and around with the question in his mind, he still wondered how much of his jealousy—and it was jealousy—had to do with another guy being with her and how much of it had to do with it being Rory who would be with her. All Luke could think was that Rory had better be smart about things because if he was anywhere near him if he didn’t, Luke was not guaranteeing he could control his actions.

“God,” he prayed into the darkness as he did nearly every night now, “be with Sage. Protect her and keep her safe, and love her, Lord, like she deserves to be loved. Amen.”

The next morning, Sage was up with the sun. For the first day in two weeks, she felt like life might actually be worth living. She was making eggs when her stepmother came into the kitchen.

“Oh, Sage,” she said. “You’re up early.”

“Don’t want to miss the day,” Sage said in her sweetest voice.

Her stepmother checked her with a strange look and then shook her head once. “Glad it’s agreeing with you.”

“Would you like an egg?” Sage asked. “There are only four left.”

At the coffeepot, her stepmother stopped, turned, and looked at her. “Uh. No. Thank you though.”

“You’re welcome.”

Jaycee made her appearance, hair tousled and shoulders slumped. She collapsed into a chair at the table. “Mornin’.”

“Good morning,” her mother said, sounding far more chipper than she had a moment ago.

Sage swallowed every mean thing she wanted to say to her sister. “Would you like an egg?”

Mother and daughter stopped cold and looked at each other.

It took a second for Jaycee to answer. “Can I have two fried?”

Well, that was going to be a challenge since she’d never actually done that, but Sage figured for family peace it was worth trying. “Two fried coming up.”

As he thought through the coming day, Luke tried to remember what time he had left on Monday. The last thing he wanted was to meet Mrs. Lawrence or worse, Jaycee on the transfer. It took all of his willpower, but he managed to keep himself busy until nearly ten o’clock. He was almost totally sure that would be safe. And, he told himself firmly, this time he would be gone before Jaycee came back at noon.

The drive over made his heart do flip-flops in his chest. He couldn’t wait to see her, to hear her voice, to see her smile. Even the thought of it brought his own out. Sunshine and Sage. Somehow they were a perfect match.

He thought this time it would be better to knock than to invite a knife attack again, and even that made him laugh. She might look fragile, but that spirit of hers was anything but. At their house, he scanned the driveway. No cars. Now if she was just home…

Sage had been sitting at the table, jumping at every sound for an hour. The little jacket was still in her room in case someone else showed up first. They wouldn’t understand. She wasn’t even sure she did, but when she stood from the table and saw his car, understanding fled with everything else from her consciousness. “Breathe, Sage. Breathe!”

That was getting harder every time he showed up.

It felt like he was picking his date up for the Prom. Luke checked his hair in the mirror and his clothes on the way up the walk. If she never noticed him, she would definitely have an excuse, he bled the word Loser. However, he couldn’t think about that right now or he would totally lose his nerve, jump back in the car, and forget this whole crazy idea.

Just as he raised his hand to knock, she opened the back door and then the screen. The sunlight played tag with the soft blonde highlights of her hair, and his voice stuck hard in his throat. “Hey.”

She smiled, and it went all the way up into her eyes. “Hey.” Pushing on out onto the porch, her gaze never left his. “I thought you forgot.”

Luke shrugged, wishing he hadn’t worried her. “Had some things to get done first. Sorry about that.”

UGH. Sage thought this was going to be so easy, but her normal take-‘em-or-leave-‘em attitude with guys didn’t seem to touch this one. Her nerves stood on edge. “You mind if we sit out here?”

He slid a hand into his jeans pocket and looked around. “Uh, no. That’s cool.”

Nodding, she stepped to his right and over to the two wicker rocking chairs on the side porch. It faced north and had shade trees all around it. So it was cooler and less in view of the whole entire world. “Over here?”

“Sure.”

At the far chair, she lowered herself onto it and felt him do the same. Think, Sage! Think! Don’t mess this up. “Oh. Here.” Handing the little jacket over, she watched his reaction but tried not to. Why was everything so intimidating around him? It was like her whole eternity rested atop of every single moment and move.

Luke picked the shoulders apart and smiled. “Awesome. Much better than Legos.”

That lifted Sage’s heart and wound her shoulders over her body. “I’m glad you like it. It’s been a while since I’ve done much sewing.”

“Seriously? This looks professional.”

She laughed. “Well, I wouldn’t go that far.”

He continued to gaze at it for another second and then dropped it to his lap and reached into his back pocket. “So what do I owe you?”

“Owe?” The word hit her like a brick. “Oh, no. You don’t owe me. I had fun doing it.”

His gaze came over to hers. “Yeah, but I didn’t expect you to do it for nothing.”

Sage sat forward. “Seriously, Luke. I don’t want money.” Her gaze dropped. She needed to say this even though half of her said she was crazy for doing so. “I’m just… thanks.”

That stopped him. “Thanks? For what? You’re the one who made it.”

“For…” A second and she breathed down the trepidation. “For being here. For being my friend. I haven’t had many of those since I got off that plane.”

He forgot the wallet and settled back down as he shook his head. “I hate that, what you’re going through. What they’ve put you through.”

Sage shrugged and crooked her lips. “It was my fault. I’m just really good at making a mess of everything.” When her gaze came up to his, she couldn’t have been more grateful to him. “Thanks for trying to be my friend anyway.”

Luke saw that look, the one that tore his heart out every time he saw it. Turning to her, he came to within an inch of the edge of his seat as he reached over for her hand. “Listen, Sage, you’ve got to know this isn’t you. All this stuff, this junk. You’re not the one doing it.”

However, when she looked up at him it was with that same sad, small smile. “I wish I could believe that.” She shook her head and sighed. “I got my phone back this morning.”

“Awesome,” but he said it softly, philosophically. “So how’s California?”

California. It was always a good thing for him to remember this was temporary and she would go home soon, and all of this would be a memory for her—if that.

“Oh. Good. I guess. I haven’t heard much from Patelyn and Mac. They’re pretty busy.”

He tilted his head at her. “Patelyn and Mac?”

She lifted her chin and let it fall. “My friends back home.” A moment and she grew still.

Luke watched her, seeing the hurt and loneliness pour off her. “You miss them?”

The answer didn’t come immediately, and when it did, it was almost inaudible on the breeze. “I guess.” She shrugged. “Not that they miss me.” Her gaze came up and brushed across his. “Life goes on, you know? And when you’re not there, it just… goes on without you.”

“And it’s gone on without you?”

Sage sighed. “Mac hooked up with Ben Griffin, a guy from our school. Cool guy.” Her brows lifted and then landed. “I always kind of thought it would be me with Ben, but I guess that wasn’t meant to be either.”

It was strange, seeing into her world from this outside vantage point, being let in by degrees.

She sighed again. “But they’re broken up now. For all I know she’s married with four kids and a mortgage with some other guy.” Sitting back in the chair she laced her fingers together and stared out across the tree-covered lawn beyond. “Makes me wonder how good of friends we really are, you know? That they could forget about me so easily.”

Leaning forward in his chair, Luke laced his fingers as his elbows rested on his knees. “They haven’t forgotten you.”

This smile was soft and sad as so many of hers where when they talked like this.

He shook his head. “They haven’t. Trust me, you’re pretty unforgettable.”

Sage’s smile increased, dragging her gaze down. A moment and she picked it back up but the smile was gone. “I wonder sometimes, how it will be when I get back. What I’m even going back to.” Her spirit seemed to fall into some world between here and there, a world only she could see. “Guess I never really pictured senior year with no friends.” The sigh was hard and harsh. “And then I think, ‘Quit being such a drama-queen, Sage. Nobody likes the diva thing.’” A moment and she shrugged. “It’s hard to know who I’m supposed to be sometimes.”

Luke’s heart fell at her feet. “Just be you.”

The smile never came when she looked at him. “I don’t even know who that is anymore.”

Why Sage was surprised when her cell phone bleeped at seven, she couldn’t really account for. Sooner or later life was going to catch back up to her. That was a given. It would have been so nice to think that those few minutes on the porch with Luke were real and would last. They weren’t, and they wouldn’t. She needed to accept that and figure out a way to be who everyone else wanted her to be.

“Hey, Doll,” Rory said. It was the first time they had spoken since that night in the driveway.

Wow getting happy and bright snapped over the melancholy was hard. “Oh, hi. Um, how’ve you been?”

“I’ll be better if you say, ‘Yes.’”

“Yes?” Trepidation wove into her spirit.

“There’s a bonfire tonight. I thought we could go together. It’s been so long since I’ve seen you.”

Why did she want it to be longer? Sage let out a breath, slowly and quietly before latching bright onto her voice. “I’ll have to ask.” It annoyed her to hear the note of fear in that statement.

“Well, get on it already. I thought I could pick you up in about an hour and we could grab something to eat.”

“Oh. Okay. I’ll ask.” She didn’t want to talk to him, and something said that shouldn’t be how things were. But she really didn’t. “I can text you back as soon as I find out.”

“K. But Sage?”

“Yeah?”

“Get them to say yes. I really want to see you.”

Breathing hurt. “Okay.”

Ever since he had left her place at quarter to noon, Luke’s heart had hurt for her. No one should be made to feel like they couldn’t be themselves. Then again… it was ironic that he was thinking that tucked away in his corner of his dad’s little shop, the scroll saw whirring on the wood under his fingers. He would never give her the thing anyway. So why he was making it was a mystery. Still, it would remind him of her, and for that reason alone, he was willing to spend the time.

He had just finished that cut when his cell beeped in his pocket, and he reached for it, hoping it was her. One look and his heart fell. Jaycee. Luke let out a long breath and swiped it on. “Hello.”

“Hey, stranger. I haven’t heard from you in a while. I was wondering if you’re still on the planet.”

Putting his hand on his belt line, he hit the off button on the floor with his foot. “Still here. How was basketball?”

“Killer. We’re going to have a real shot at regionals this year.”

He pulled his arm up under his other one and sat down on the little bench next to the saw. “Awesome.”

“Yeah. Listen, I was thinking. We haven’t been out in a while. What do you say? You, me, some cheeseburgers and then head out to the bonfire? It’s at Chester’s again.”

His heart jerked and throttled. “Uh, well, I don’t know. I…”

“Oh, come on. Maybe Rachel will be out there, or Christine.”

Or Sage. That thought was enough to get his heart to stop completely. He arched his hand up over his head and rubbed there. “I don’t know, Jayc. It’s kind of been a long week.”

“All the more reason to kick back and have some fun. Come on. I’m prepared to beg, and I’ll go as far as groveling if I have to.”

He couldn’t win for losing. “Fine. What time should I be there?”

“Wow,” Rory said when they were driving out of her parents’ driveway. Yes, it had taken every sweet word she could come up with to get them to let her go, but she was here, and Sage was going to make the most of this night. “You look amazing.”

It was nice to hear that after feeling like the underside of a running shoe all week. “Thanks.”

His gaze stayed on her as he headed down the road. “Why don’t you come and bring your amazing self over here?”

Unlatching her seatbelt, she scooted over next to him and latched the lap belt. He put his arm around her and nuzzled closer.

“Much better.”

“I really have got to get on the summer reading,” Jaycee said as they sat in the rounded booth waiting for their burgers. “Jacquie said it’s horrible. Something about the deep South, segregation and all that. It amazes me how mean people were back then.”

Luke was having a really hard time falling in line with this like he used to. “Yeah. I’m sure.”

“Hey, why don’t you get the tator tots and we can share?”

All the fun drained from his body. “Sure. Why not?”

The thing that Sage saw when they pulled up to the little diner was the black sports car out front, and her heart waltzed three steps and then thudded on its face. “Oh. Uh. We’re going to stop here?”

“Yeah.” Rory put the pickup in park. “That a problem?”

Sweet had never felt so very desperate. “It’s… you know. I just would prefer to go to the other place. If you don’t mind…” Terror at the thought of what she would find if they went in there wound her arms around him and sent her hand up onto his chest. “Please? For me?”

Rory’s gaze came full on her then, and he looked like he might devour her. “For you? Anything.”

She made sure to move slowly and to show no signs of relief as she settled back in. They were back on the road when he put his arm around her.

“Maybe then we can take a little detour. I know just the place.”

The giggle was half in worry, half an act. “Okay.”

“And then there’s this one play.” Jaycee was drawing them out on the napkins as they waited for their food.

Luke had never been that into basketball. Oh, he went to some of the games, and he knew a dribble from a jump shot, but he really didn’t care much about what happened when the post shifted through the lane.

“I love it because they kick it in to Jacquie and then back out to me on the 3-point. So everyone merges to block her, and I’m home free.” She set the pencil down triumphantly. “High score here I come.”

He nodded, hoping their food would show up soon. Glancing at his watch, he calculated the time until sundown. He wondered if Sage would be there with Rory, but he didn’t dare ask.

“That would be so cool to get to regionals,” Jaycee said, lifting her shoulders. “To lift that trophy. To bring it home. Awe-some.”

“Yeah. Awesome.”

“I figured since it’s been a while and everything,” Rory said, heading down a road out of town that Sage couldn’t remember ever traveling. It was getting harder and harder to tamp her nerves down when she was around him.

Then again, like she had told Luke in the kitchen, they were going together. So what did she expect? Being a girlfriend or whatever she was, being with him, going out with him meant certain things, and she knew that as well as anyone. Plus, he was good-looking, and she would only be here for the summer. Much better to spend it with someone who wasn’t looking to get in too deep.

He hadn’t even texted her. Yes, she should be hurt about that, but a big part of her was relieved. When she left, there wouldn’t be a ton of drama. She wondered as he wound the pickup onto the rocky trail if he would even care. Would he come to see her off? Would he remember her in two months?

Probably not. And that was better. She told herself so over and over again. That was better. No emotional attachment. Just a few kicks and laughs, and then everyone would go on with their life as if the summer had never happened.

The sun was just going down when Luke and Jaycee headed out of the diner and out toward the bonfire. They would be early, but that was okay. It wasn’t like they were on an earth-shatteringly perfect date, Luke thought as he drove. Two friends. Hanging out. Just as it had always been. Just how it would always be.

He accepted that now. Maybe in a way he never had before. Jaycee wasn’t the love of his life. The problem was, his heart reminded him, that the love of his life was out somewhere right now on the arm of Rory Harris. The breath was hard as he put his elbow on the window casing and rubbed his lips. God, please take care of her.

“So, you like it?” Rory asked when they were on the cliff overlooking the ocean sprawled out before them.

“It’s amazing.” Sage sat forward to take it all in. Because the sun was setting behind them, the waves were awash in soft pastels dusted by hints of white caps.

“Just like someone else I know.” He turned to her then, his dark eyes drinking her in with every inch he erased between them. “Man, I’ve missed you.”

Darkness had fallen on the world in earnest, and Jaycee was off talking with some of her friends from class. Luke hung back, away from the fire and the crowd. He looked at his watch. Nearly ten. He glanced around again as if that would clear anything up. Maybe Sage hadn’t gone out with Rory after all. Maybe she was at home, sewing or reading.

Knowing he was being ridiculous, he pulled out his cell phone and tapped out a message, pleading with her to “Please answer” as he put it back in his pocket.

For someone who looked so smooth, Rory was anything but. Sage had fought a losing battle with herself to get all of this to be okay ever since he’d turned to her, but it really wasn’t getting any better. The harder he tried to act like he knew what he was doing, the worse it got. His kisses were creeping her out, and how one guy could have so many hands in so many places was beyond her.

“Rory,” she finally said, coming up for air from his awkward and incessant pawing. “We really need to get to the bonfire. Jaycee’s gonna be wondering where I am, and I don’t want to get grounded again.”

The phone in her pocket buzzed, and she dug for it even as his gaze came up from her collarbone, and he swayed there. “Now?”

“That’s probably her.” She yanked at the phone out, swiped it once and jerked in a breath.

Where are you?

Quickly she typed a reply and then went back to extricating herself from this humiliating situation.

“Seriously,” Sage said, working to get herself out from under his grip judiciously. Getting him angry out here was not a good idea. What she needed was to get him to take her back to civilization. The only way to do that was to act like it was in his best interest to do so. “That was her, wondering where we are. If we don’t get there soon, I’ll probably get grounded again, and I’d hate to miss the fireworks thingy on Sunday. We’re going, right?”

Rory’s gaze turned liquid again. “I thought there were some pretty awesome fireworks going on right here.”

To not throw up was a challenge. “I know,” she said, her voice dripping with sweetness, “but I’m seriously gonna get grounded for a month if I don’t get there pretty quick. We wouldn’t want that, would we?”

It took him a minute to decide, and then finally, he sat up and righted his shirt which had come askew in the festivities. He looked in the mirror and straightened his hair. “Lookout Pointe, making out with Sage Hollywood. The guys are going to make me their king.”

That queasy thing was getting worse, but when he turned his gaze to her, she quickly snapped a smile over that thought. “You’d look good with a crown.”

Coming.

Luke had been holding on to that one word for 15 minutes. However, what part of him saw the truck first, he didn’t know, but with one glance at it parking in the far ditch, his heart went hard. So they were together. Sage was with Rory.

“Oh, great,” Jaycee said, sliding up beside him, her gaze glued the same place his was. “They showed up. Lovely.”

Luke couldn’t agree more.

“Come on, doll-face,” Rory said, helping her down from the high truck seat. “I wanna show you off.”

Sage giggled, knowing her part better than whatever was real. She couldn’t really tell what that was anymore. The lines between who she had always been and who she was catching glimpses of being blurred dangerously so she couldn’t tell where one ended and the other began. Latching on to Rory lest she get pitched headlong onto the gravel of the dirt road, she let him lead her past the vehicles and right into the midst of the party.

Never had she wanted to be somewhere else so badly. Still, she was Sage Hollywood, and she was going to act like it if it killed her.

“Hey! It’s Harris and his hot girlfriend,” one of the guys at the fire said. He turned and came over to them, putting his hand up for Rory to catch upright. “Dude. Where’ve you guys been?”

“We had a little business to take care of,” Rory said, pulling her closer to him and grinning through the chomping of his gum. When he looked down at her, Sage and every other person there go the message loud and clear.

“Business or pleasure, my man?” the guy said.

“Pleasure, dude. Believe me, it was all pleasure.”

The guy let out a whoop, and Sage felt every gaze around that fire fall on her and lock there. She fought to smile as she tried to put even a small amount of space between them. It didn’t take a genius to know what they all surmised about her, about them. About where they had been and what they had been doing. She brushed her hair back and lifted her chin. It was her only defense.

Why, oh, why did she keep letting herself get talked into things that would come back to bite her in the heart? She had no real answer for that.

“Isn’t that right, doll?” Rory asked, leaning in to her. Even his breath was starting to get to her.

“Uh, y-yeah,” she said, trying to turn on the charm and brightness, but it wasn’t working like it normally did. Part of the problem was it was hard to act when what your body was telling you was the complete opposite. Part of it was, every rational thought in her mind was screaming at her to get away from him because he was pawing at her again. His hand dropping from her shoulder to her hip and then sliding down sent her hands pushing him away before she thought about it.

However, before she could recover from that, Rory spun her into his arms so her balance faltered beneath her. He caught her waist and kissed her soundly as whoops and hollers erupted all around them. She was spinning, falling, plummeting, and fear gripped her full force. “Ror… Stop. Please. Stop.”

By the time he stood her up and let her go, Sage was on the verge of a tearful meltdown of terror and humiliation. Everyone was watching. Everyone.

“That’s the way we do it in North Carolina, babe,” Rory said, with a wink and a chomp on his gum.

Revulsion snaked through her, sweeping her senses with it. His gaze was lustful and shameless as he wrapped his arm all the way around her again. This time there was no space between them. Not a centimeter. Not a millimeter. He made sure of that.

“Isn’t that right, boys?” he asked the crowd around them who roared their agreement. He looked down at her again, leering at her, and Sage was beginning to think this was a very, very bad idea. “See, even Hollywood could learn a thing or two from us country boys.”

She couldn’t take it anymore. “Rory.” Sage squirmed, trying to push away from him, but his grip was far too strong. “Rory, please, let me go. You’re hurting me.”

From the other side of the fire, Luke had watched the whole thing with a revulsion of his own. How dare Rory treat her like a sideshow for his buddies. How dare he use her like that.

“Wow. She is something else,” Jaycee said with a roll of her eyes. “Mom and Dad would be mortified.”

Mortified, that was a good word, but it was now arching to full-out fury. “That’s it.” Luke stepped away from her just as Jaycee realized what was happening.

“Luke! No! Don’t! She’s not worth it! Luke!”

However, he never heard her. He was too focused on the animal now framed in his sights on the other side of that fire. Around the flames and right up to the two of them he charged. “Let her go, Harris.”

Rory stopped the lurid show and looked Luke up and then down. “Get out of here, Baker. This doesn’t concern you.” Just to make his point, Rory slid his hand down and across her hip, yanking her to his side, causing her to yelp in pain.

“Luke.” Panic surged in Sage’s eyes even as he saw the tears pooling there. “Please. Don’t. Okay? Just don’t… It’s okay. Really.”

“Luke,” Jaycee said, coming up beside him. “Stop it. This isn’t worth it.”

But neither of them swayed his resolve to make Rory Harris get his grubby mitts off of Sage. Not out of jealousy but because she didn’t deserve to be treated like an object for some idiot’s enjoyment. “I said, ‘Get your hands off of her.’”

“And she said it’s okay. Apparently she likes it rough,” Rory said spitefully, “so why don’t you just back-off, hero. Or is it zero?”

The taunt bounced off of Luke like a gnat on a windshield. This wasn’t about him, and he wasn’t leaving.

“I’m telling you, Harris. Get your hands off the lady, or I’ll take them off myself.”

“Oooo, big talk for such a little punk.” Rory stepped up to him, daring him, taunting him. “Hollywood’s with me tonight, Baker. But if you want, you can have the leftovers.”

There was no thought to it as the adrenaline drove Luke’s fist right into Rory’s face.

“Luke!”

The scene erupted in chaos as Sage tumbled backward from the trajectory of Rory stumbling into her. She grabbed onto him trying to keep him from going after Luke, but he and his shirt went right through her grasp. “No! Rory! Stop! Luke! Stop!”

In seconds they were in a tangled knot of fists and fury as every other person there gathered around, egging them on.

“Luke!” Sage screamed in horror as she watched them. “No! Don’t! Please don’t!”

As they pounded each other, stumbling and lurching and rolling in the dirt, Luke knew his only hope was to land a punch that would stop Rory cold, and as they rolled one atop the other down into the ditch, he knew that would take a miracle. This was no playground scuffle, and Rory had far too much invested in being the tough guy to just give up. The noise around them increased to the point it was vying for control of the pounding in his head. He took one more swing that sent Rory’s head into the dirt behind him.

“Okay. Okay.” Rory came up holding both hands up as Luke grabbed his shirt and yanked him forward ready to finish him off. “I’m done. I’m done.”

Luke glanced behind him to make sure she was there, and like a vision in the firelight, she was. He looked back at Rory and cocked his fist as if to make one final point. “Don’t ever go near her again.” With that, he shoved Rory down, twisted on his knee, and stood. Never in a million years would he have thought himself capable of killing someone, but standing up, walking away took every ounce of willpower he had.

He climbed out of the ditch as people scattered in all directions, watching his every move.

“Luke,” Sage said, worry pouring through her voice as she came up to him. “You didn’t have to…”

“I know.” He put his arm around her and turned her gently. “Let’s get out of here.”

As Sage stumbled through the crowd with Luke to his car, she twisted to look up at him. “You’re bleeding.”

He touched the side of his head before she got to the cut, and he shrugged without comment. At his car, he opened the door, and for the first time, Sage realized they weren’t alone.

“Do you mind telling me what the heck that was?” Jaycee demanded from behind them, and when they turned as one, she stopped, jutted out her foot, and crossed her arms.

“Just get in the car,” Luke said to her as if tired beyond all sanity.

“No. Do you have any idea what you just did? Do you?”

Luke let out a breath. “Get in the car, Jaycee.”

Realizing that they couldn’t all sit up front, Sage made a break for the back. She nearly killed her nail and her knuckle getting the bucket seat pulled forward. And when she dove in, she caught the car’s interior coming the other way. However, making any sort of spectacle of herself at the moment was out of the question, so she nursed her wounds and her disbelief in the back in stunned silence.

In the front, Jaycee jerked on the seat, latching it in place with a thwack. She dropped into it as Luke got in the other side.

The party sounds were resuming, but none of them so much as noticed. With no words, he started the car and backed out of the ditch, spinning dirt and sand in all directions. Sage considered saying something but what to say was harder to find than understanding what had just happened. There was Rory, and then there was Luke, and now…

“I hope you’re happy with yourself,” Jaycee said, and Sage didn’t have to see her arms crossed to know they were.

“Uh, happy’s not exactly on the list at the moment.” He reached down and flipped on the air.

“What the heck was that anyway?” Jaycee demanded. “Fighting with Rory Harris? Street fighting? Pounding each other into the dirt?”

“He was out of line.”

“He was having fun at a party.”

Luke glanced in the backseat, Sage felt it. “At your sister’s expense.”

Jaycee guffawed. “She’s a big girl, Luke. I’m sure she can take care of herself.” Her sister’s glance into the back felt like a snakebite. “Besides, I’m sure Rory just figured they were continuing where they left off from earlier.”

Hurt and horror, ache and humiliation jammed into Sage’s spirit and lodged there as she let out a breath of being forcibly hit.

“Wow,” Luke said, looking over at Jaycee.

“What?”

He shook his head slowly. “Just wow.” The breath he breathed was audible even in the backseat. His gaze found Sage’s in the rearview mirror, and Sage had never felt so guilty about her existence in her whole life.

They pulled up at the Lawrences’ house at five-‘til-eleven, and the awkwardness invading the car felt like it might smother them all.

“Um, thanks… for the ride… Luke,” Sage said from the back. Bubbly hurt, and so did the attempt.

“Yeah, no problem.”

When it became obvious that Jaycee was not getting out, Luke opened his door and pulled up his seat. Sage extricated herself from the darkened backseat, took one look at him, and knew Jaycee was right about everything she was thinking.

“I’m sorry,” Sage said, looking up into his face because he wasn’t looking at her.

Then his gaze came down to hers, and vulnerable had never meant what it did at that moment. “I’m just glad you’re all right.” He pulled her into a hug that was warm and soft and safe, and Sage never wanted it to end.

Unfortunately, it lasted only two breaths and she was on her own again. “I guess I’ll see ya.”

He nodded and put his hands at his waist as he stepped back and away from her. Then his gaze fell, and Sage knew that was her cue to make her exit.

Strange as she headed up the walk, she’d always thought the feeling of having guys fight over her would feel different than this, would be different than this. How exactly she wasn’t sure, but she had a vague idea of it just the same. She opened the back door and stepped inside, having no idea what came next.

“You getting out or what?” Luke asked, and he heard the harshness in his tone and almost didn’t care.

“You’re serious,” Jaycee said in reply. “That’s it. ‘Get out of my car’? Who are you and what did you do with Luke?”

He set his jaw, not wanting to fight with her, but the adrenaline still coursing through him was making that very difficult. “I could ask you the same question.”

“What does that mean?”

“It means you’re being a witch to Sage, and you know it.”

With that Jaycee sprang out of the car and stomped around to where he turned from his door, still standing there having not had the sanity to get back in. “You have some nerve to say that to me, Luke Baker. You of all people know how impossible it has been since she’s been here.”

“Yeah, and I’m beginning to think most of that was because of you.”

If he’d have actually hit her, she couldn’t have looked more surprised. “You’re kidding, right? Tell me you’re kidding.” Then ice fell into her eyes. “She gotten to you. She’s got you under her spell too.” Jaycee shook her head. “I don’t believe this.”

“She’s not as bad as you think.”

“And you’re an absolute idiot for believing that.” Jaycee shook her head. “Well, it’s been nice knowing you. Let me know when you come back to your senses and realize she really is a witch.”

“Jayc…”

But Jaycee threw up her hands. “Save it. Okay? I don’t even want to know.”

With that, she turned and headed up the walk. Luke closed his eyes and shook his head. What had just happened? The last thing he clearly remembered was holding that cell phone and wondering how long “Coming” would take. He let out a hard breath. What had he done?

Chapter 15

“Mind telling me what’s going on?” Jaycee’s mom was standing in the kitchen, bewilderment in her eyes when Jaycee came storming in.

“What’s going on? I’ll tell you what’s going on.” Fury had taken over every sense of propriety she’d ever had. “There was a fight tonight, at the bonfire. That’s what’s going on.”

“A fight?” Worry coursed through her mother’s eyes.

“Yeah.” Jaycee wound her arms over themselves as her father came in the opposite door. She looked right at him. “Over your daughter.”

“What?” her mother said. “Who was fighting?”

Jaycee’s spirit turned black and ugly. She could feel it, and honestly she didn’t care. “Rory Harris and Luke Baker.”

“Luke?” It was like her mother had been punched. “Luke was fighting?”

“Yeah.” With a sarcastic nod, Jaycee let the word out in a breath. “He about killed Rory.”

“What? Why would he do such a thing?”

The glance Jaycee shot at her father confirmed he was looking at the hallway beyond. He deserved this too. “Because Sage is a slut, that’s why.”

“Jay-cee Marie!” her mother gasped. “We do not use that kind of language in this house.”

A small shrug and Jaycee shook her head. “What else would you call it when she’s having guys over here without y’all around, going out and not getting to the party until after ten, showing up pawing all over Rory for everybody to see? I didn’t think nice girls did that kind of thing, but maybe I was wrong.”

Her parents exchanged a glance, and her mother sighed.

“Go to your room.”

With a flounce Jaycee headed that direction. “Gladly.”

“Well, you’re home early,” Luke’s mother said as he stood in the darkened kitchen at the freezer, searching for something that might take the swelling out of his eye. He was sure the cut looked as bad as it felt, and he was beginning to wonder if he didn’t have two black eyes to boot.

“Yeah.” He dug out a bag of frozen carrots and put it to his eye. Man, that was cold, and it hurt. “Ugh.” Turning, he knew he couldn’t hide this so he didn’t even try.

“Luke Brandon Baker! What in the world happened to you?” His mother flipped on the light, and that stung about as bad as the carrots did.

“Ugh.” He could lie, and maybe he would have if he had thought about it long enough, but his mind was having trouble piecing it all together enough, that to figure out how to make up a lie was simply and utterly impossible. “Rory and I got into it.”

“Rory? Rory Harris?”

“Yeah.” He sat down at the table, spent.

“Wh…? Luke. I know you have had your differences in the past but fighting? That doesn’t fix anything.”

“Yeah, well, it was the only thing I could think of at the time, and it just kind of happened.”

His mother let out a breath, took the carrots away, and looked at the cut. “Kind of happened, huh? There was no cause to this fight, nothing that started it?”

Somehow in the whole fight thing, he hadn’t really considered that he would have to explain himself. Now, he realized what everyone would think when he did. “It was just… he showed up with Sage. Jaycee’s sister. And he was like all over her.”

“The Wentworth girl? From California?” This breath was harder and harsher. “That girl is no good. I knew it the first time I laid eyes on her.”

“No, Mom. Seriously. It’s not like that.”

She shook her head at him as she examined the cut. “Listen to me, Luke. You need to stay away from girls like that. They are trouble coming and going.”

Somehow that hurt his heart as much as the punch had hurt his eye.

“I cannot believe this,” Emily Lawrence hissed at her husband. “We cannot let that girl out of our sights for a minute. How dare she go and do something this stupid. This is going to be all over town by morning.”

Greg sat down in the chair, feeling the guilt slice all the way through him.

At the sink she put her hands on her hips. “I wish you would say something. Something! Am I the only one who thinks this is a nightmare?”

His gaze came up to hers, and he said the only thing he could think of. “I’m so sorry.”

Long, long after the sounds had died down, Sage lay on her bed. She hadn’t bothered to dress for bed or to even pull the covers back. What was the use of propriety? What was the use of trying to make them think she was a normal human being?

She laughed at that, and it hurt. Normal. She was a freak, a slut, a walking-one-woman-wrecking ball. By now her parents were surely going to ground her for life, and honestly she wasn’t sure she could blame them. They didn’t know what had happened. Not really.

Her heart turned over with her as she stared at the ceiling, replaying the whole thing in her head. She should never have led Rory on. She should have had him take her home from Lookout Pointe. Not doing that was her first mistake. And that one was followed by a myriad of others.

In her pocket the cell phone beeped, and she dug for it, every move sapping more of her strength. When she swiped it on, her heart jerked and she closed her eyes. Luke. Why couldn’t he just accept she was kryptonite like everyone else had?

With the last ounce of her strength, she hit the talk button and put it to her ear. “Luke…”

“I know. I shouldn’t have called, but I can’t help it.”

“Luke, you know, you know this can’t happen. We can’t…”

“Just hear me out. Please.”

“Fine.”

“Look, my mom freaked out, and I’m sure Dad is going to go ballistic on me in the morning. So who knows if I’ll get a chance to talk to you again before I die. But I wanted you to know that tonight wasn’t your fault.”

“Luke…”

“No, Sage. It wasn’t. It isn’t. You’re not like that, like everyone thinks you are.”

She wanted to believe him, but she just didn’t anymore. “Thanks,” she said softly because she might not ever get another chance. “For what you did tonight.”

“Are you okay?”

That one was not easy to answer. “Trying to be.”

“Listen to me, Rory Harris is a jerk of epic proportions. He has been for a long time. He was just using you to show off to everyone.”

“I know.”

That stopped Luke cold. “So, why did you let him? Why did you say it was okay?”

Her breath was so soft in the darkness between them, he nearly didn’t hear it. “Look, sometimes who you are and who you’re supposed to be are two different things. It’s like being a mirror image of yourself. One side is real, the other isn’t, but both look like you, and sometimes it’s hard to tell the difference between what’s real and what’s not. I know you think I’m really the reflection, but maybe that reflection isn’t really real at all. Maybe you just wish it was.”

“Sage.” His heart squeezed painfully in his chest.

“Luke, you’re a nice, wonderful, sensitive, caring guy, and it would be so easy to fall for you and let myself believe I’m really who you think I am. But I’m not. I’m not nice or kind or any of those things. And trying to pretend I am isn’t fair to you. Especially because everyone else already knows the truth.”

“But what if all they’re seeing is the reflection? What if that’s what’s not real?”

“You’ll never know what it means to me to know you think that, but I can’t drag you through this. It wouldn’t be fair. Besides, at the rate this is going, I’ll probably be on a plane back to California by morning.”

“They’d send you back?”

“Are you kidding? Emily would drive me back if Dad would let her.” She paused to breathe a moment. “Thank you, Luke. For believing in me and for fighting for me. Whoever ends up with you is one incredibly lucky girl.”

He opened his mouth to say he wanted that girl to be her.

“I’ve got to go. Good luck with everything.”

“Sage?”

“No, Luke. No more. Okay? Just let me go. Trust me, it’s better that way for everyone.”

Saying goodnight was the hardest thing Sage had ever had to do, but he deserved no less. “G’night, Luke.”

“Sag…”

But she hit the off button and dropped the phone to her chest as tears sprang out of her eyes. “I love you.”

Sage was smart enough to stay in her room when Saturday morning hit. Yes, there was a community meal at noon. No, she wasn’t going.

That raked right across her heart, but she had made up her mind. It wasn’t fair to Luke to keep showing up and dragging him through her muck of a life. That was clearer today than it had been even the day before. No. She would stay as far away from him and everyone else as possible. It was better that way. She was sure of it.

“What happened to you?” Ms. P asked when Luke arrived just after ten a.m.

The cut had dried shut, but his eye was indeed swollen. He wondered if Jaycee would be here, and he didn’t dare think beyond her. But she was nowhere to be seen. “Don’t ask.”

“Lawd, you look like somebody done used your face to rake the garden.”

“Yeah.” At the sink, he turned it on to wash his hands as Pastor Steve came in from out front.

“We’re going to need…” One look at Luke stopped him cold. “Luke? What happened?”

Why did he think he was going to be hearing that question a lot. “Don’t ask.”

The house had gotten quiet by eleven o’clock, and the truth was Sage had to go to the bathroom. She wanted to eat too, but that was probably not advisable. Quietly she opened her door, listened, and stepped out on silent feet. Softly, softly, she made her way to the bathroom, slipped in, and closed the door. Only when it was locked did she let the breath out.

“Can’t believe you had the guts to show up today,” Jaycee said as she stood at the sink washing off the lettuce and shaking it so that the water droplets went everywhere.

Luke knew better than to get into it with her here, so he kept chopping the tomatoes and said nothing.

“So, didya get grounded forever?” She shook the last head off and cut the water.

“No.”

She shook her head. “Well, you should’ve. That was a stupid stunt you pulled last night.”

“Who said it was a stunt?” Then Luke realized his volume was a little higher than he had meant for it to be, and he ducked and went back to cutting.

“Well, Mom and Dad were fit to be tied, and they’re all-fired worried about you and your folks.”

Somehow he felt the omission, and he looked up. “How’s Sage?”

Jaycee shrugged. “Who cares? She didn’t even have the guts to show up this morning for breakfast. Not that I blame her. I’m sure Mom and Dad are going to read her the Riot Act if she ever dares to show her face again.”

As much as he wanted to argue with that, Luke swallowed his protest; however, he vowed that somehow, some way, he was going to make this right and make them all see that they were judging Sage who didn’t deserve any of it.

“That about ready?” Jaycee asked, nodding to the bowl he was putting the tomatoes in.

“Yeah.”

“I’m not kidding, Greg,” Sage’s stepmom said. They were down the hall, in their bedroom, but the voice made it through the door and right to Sage with no trouble at all when she came out of the bathroom. “I have had it with that girl. Do you hear me? I. Have. Had it. I have tried and tried to make this work, not that you’ve been any help at all, and I’m sick of it. I don’t want her around my family. I don’t want her around my kids…”

“What do you want me to do, Em? You want me to ship her back? You know I can’t do that.”

“Why not? Huh? Why? Why does she have to be our problem?”

“Because she’s my daughter.”

“Your daughter. She’s your daughter, Greg. Not mine.”

“I get that. Believe me, I do, but we’ve talked about this. Ericka and Jason needed time. You know how that is. Patching things up after…”

“A guy cheating on you?” Mrs. Lawrence shot back. “Yeah, Greg. I know exactly what that’s like. I think we all do.”

All the air disappeared from around her, and Sage felt for the wall as her world rocked. What were they talking about?

“But their marriage is not my problem, and I’m not sure why it’s yours either.”

“Look, Em. I don’t expect you to understand, but I don’t want them to get as close as we did to a divorce.”

Divorce? Her parents were divorcing? Sure, she’d seen the signs, but her mother had said… The rocking increased until Sage was sure she would be thrown right out of the earth’s gravitational pull.

“Well, that’s just great, Greg. And what about us? Huh?”

“What about us?”

“Are you completely blind? I have been here, trying to hold this family together for a month now while your daughter has been trying her darndest to wreck everything. She’s out ‘til all hours of the night, partying, smoking, drinking, who knows what all else, and now she’s getting guys into fights over her?”

“I’m not thrilled about her behavior either,” her father said. “But shipping her back to California with no one there to supervise her is not the answer.”

“Well, keeping her here isn’t the answer either.” The pause stretched into ominous territory. “I didn’t want it to come down to us or her, Greg, but it just might.”

“Em…”

“No. I’m not kidding this time. I’ve had it.”

Their movement toward the door sent Sage fleeing down the hallway, into her own room, where she laced her arms over themselves and slid down the door, dissolving into tears that might never again stop.

The tears had never really dried, but eventually Sage picked herself up off the floor and went over to the little desk. They hadn’t taken her phone, but that didn’t matter. She had no desire to talk to anyone anyway. With one finger she shut it off as her eyes fell closed. It was better this way.

She couldn’t talk to them—any of them. What would she say, “So, Mom, when’s the divorce?” “So, Luke, how stupid do you feel getting busted up for trash like me?”

Numbness began to take over her spirit, and truthfully, it was almost a welcome change. If she could just stop feeling forever, that would be even better.

When he got home from the meal, Luke sat on his bed and sent her a text. He waited, thinking she might reply. When she didn’t, he lay back on his bed, put his arm on his forehead, and wondered how in the world he would ever forget about her.

Not eating wasn’t much of a problem. Sage couldn’t have eaten had she wanted to. And clearly her family didn’t care because no one bothered to so much as knock on her door. However, by Sunday morning, she knew she couldn’t hide forever. Sunday meant church, and even if it killed her, she was not going to start more rumors by not showing up.

She chose her pressed white dress, the one that looked like something the chairwoman of the board would wear. C.E.O. That’s what her dad… Jason had said when he saw it. That name sliced through her heart, but she wrenched her chin upward as she stared at herself in the mirror.

“Don’t, Sage. Don’t think. Don’t feel. Just get through this.” With the precision of a million times of practice, she reached up and spun her hair into the tightest bun she could make. They might not want her, and that was fine. They might ship her back to California. That was fine too. But she was not going to go out looking like they had gotten to her. She was not.

As Luke dressed in his normal church attire, he wondered if she would be there today. His heart hurt over what everyone would surely say about her because of him. The cut was still clearly visible though the swelling in his eye had gone down owing to five bags of frozen carrots. He shook his head. If only things made sense…

“Eighty percent chance,” her father said at the head of the table as Sage bent over her bowl of little yellow flaky things and forced them to go down and stay. “They’re going to have to cancel it.”

“Macy said they were thinking about postponing until Wednesday when the weather is supposed to clear out,” her stepmother said.

“July 7th just doesn’t have the same ring to it,” he said.

“Yeah, well, the city spent a pretty penny on those fireworks. They’re not just going to skip it.”

“There’s not going to be fireworks?” Ryder asked with a soft whine.

“Probably not tonight, Champ,” his father said, and then for one half-second his gaze chanced onto hers and then dropped.

Sage wished the fireworks could stay away forever.

Head up. Shoulders back. She could do this, Sage thought as she followed the others to the church door. She had never been grateful enough for Ms. Habersong’s Ballet Studio. Today, all that training was going to come in very handy.

It was amazing how he could feel her presence enter any space. Luke was helping Trent put the bulletins together in the corner. Mildred had been sick all week, and no one had thought to stuff the informational flyer about the church’s bazaar into the things. He picked one up and was mid-stuff when the vision at the door yanked him to a stop and held him captive.

Blinking twice to even make sure it was her, he froze without realizing he’d stopped moving. Snow-white dress. Heels. Pearls. She was perfection personified.

Luke blinked again before he could remember where he was and why. Finally, he shook out of the trance and went back to work, kind of. However, his gaze kept track of her. Every step was a model of precision, her chin high, her shoulders square. How she wasn’t a queen, he wasn’t quite sure because she sure looked like one.

Then as he watched without watching, he began to get another sense, and his gaze jerked the other direction. He saw the bent heads, the glances at her, the whispers. Looking back over at her, he saw the fight then—the fight to keep herself from meltdown, the fight not to notice she was being shredded right there for all to see. He wanted to do something, but what could he do? He couldn’t punch whispers in the nose.

Sage saw him about a second and a half upon entering, but it was safer for everyone if she didn’t broadcast that. Instead, she put a smile on her pink-tinted lips and graciously followed her parents into the mouth of the lion’s den.

When it was time to pick up the collection, Luke hesitated one second too long and Trent sent him to the far side—her side, their side. He walked to the front with the two baskets, knowing this was going to be a disaster. Two rows, four, and then he was right in front of theirs. His gaze swept across them and snagged on hers for one heartbeat. Who looked down and away first, he would never know, but the rip felt like it tore his heart in two.

The rest of the service was spent fighting every tear in her heart. Sage had never known there were so many. Why could the first really decent guy she’d ever known be so far out of her reach? And why, oh, why could she not just be with him and forget about what anybody and everybody would say about it?

But she couldn’t. She knew it, and she knew he did too.

By the time the service was over, Luke was a jumbled mess. He wanted to talk to her, but he knew what that would cause. Tongues were wagging as it was, and the last thing he wanted to do was to make it worse.

The thunderclap above them as the crowd headed out the back double doors pulled every gaze to the ceiling which shook with the fury of the storm.

“Sounds like a wild one out there,” Trent said.

Funny. It felt like a wild one in here.

Luke looked across at her as she followed her family out, gaze down. The fight was gone now. The tongues had won. She was defeated. With everything in him he wanted to go over there and wrap her in his arms, but like the coward he was, he stayed where he was and let the wolves have their way with her.

What had Sage really thought he would do? Come talk to her? She’d all-but told him off. Did she really expect him to jump through rings of fire? Besides what would that prove and to whom?

No, she decided as the family ran out and jumped in the van under the cover of the awning. It was better this way. It really was.

The whole rotten day passed with Luke lying on his bed, holding his phone, wishing she would answer one of his texts. Just one and then they could talk. Would that really be so bad? Would it break the world’s rules about who can be together and who can’t? He wanted to honor her wishes, but he also wanted in the worst way to make sure she was all right. She hadn’t looked all right when they left. Sad, downtrodden, lonely. Those were closer.

He wished with everything in him that the rain would clear and the fireworks show would be tonight. If it was, he would find her, and they would talk. He would hold her, and she would let him and all would finally be right with the world. Why those things always worked out so well in his head and never did in life, he really couldn’t tell. But that was a sad fact of life he was beginning to realize would never change.

When Sage turned her phone on just to check it at eight, she wasn’t terribly surprised to see the string of texts. “Luke,” she whispered. She lay back on the bed and read through them once and then again. If only…

Chapter 16

It was amazing how off-kilter life could feel. When Luke woke up Monday morning to find the world still dripping and drizzling, all he could think was how perfectly it matched his mood. The cut on his eye was healing, but the one in his heart was not. Sage still hadn’t texted back, and he had the sinking feeling that she never would.

So, true to every other time he had needed an escape from life, he headed out through the depressing drizzle to the workshop in the corner of their property. He thought about the calf hutches he was supposed to repair for Randy Carter, but that would have to wait. No way was he going out on a day like today and get soaked to the bone. Maybe by Wednesday when this was supposed to clear off.

Crazy how life looked like one long, interminable slog from here into eternity. At the little shop, he ducked inside, went to the back, and flipped on the dimming light over his work area. He needed to fix that thing, but for now, he really couldn’t care about that or anything else.

Reaching over, he grabbed a random piece of wood and flipped on the little scroll saw. It was stupid and sickening and ridiculous, but since he couldn’t tell her how he felt because she wouldn’t let him, he could pour those thoughts and feelings into the wood. Daisies. Somehow, when he thought of her, that’s the image that came up.

Straightening, he flipped the scroll off and grabbed the wood burner. In the state he was in, he’d probably burn the place down, but his mind showed him the design and he went to work on it.

Nothing other than sitting in her room was safe, and Sage had no courage to face anyone or anything anyway. So she sat curled on her bed with the covers in a jumble around her while the sounds of morning drifted through the door. She looked over at the books on the desk, but none of them held any fascination. Nothing did.

As the house beyond her door grew quiet, she considered her options. As crazy as it sounded, dusting and dishes seemed better than being trapped in here. So just after eleven, she dragged herself from the bed, threw on her jeans and a lacey white top. It didn’t matter what she looked like, she wasn’t going out of the house anyway.

At her door, she cracked it, listened, and cracked it some more. All was quiet beyond. There were breakfast bars in the pantry. She could grab one of those and scout the rest of the place out. Maybe everyone had gone. That was a blessing too great to ask for, but she asked anyway.

“There you are,” Luke’s mom said, coming in the shop. “I’ve been looking for you everywhere.”

“Here I am.” Luke cut the saw, turned, and ran his fingers up and through his hair to push it out of his face. It had become dislodged in the concentration of carving the edges of the daisy. He’d decided that he could attach it to the curve of the S on her name that he had made the last time he couldn’t get her out of his thoughts. Where he would ever put the thing, he had no idea, but he didn’t want to think about that right now, so he didn’t. “What’s up?”

“Hannah’s in the minor emergency clinic. She cut her finger or something. She thinks it’s gonna require stitches, so I’m going to run it over to the college. She doesn’t want me to, but…”

He smiled. “When has that ever made any difference?” Wiping his hands, he faced her. “So you need something?”

“Well, I called your dad to tell him what happened, and he was hoping I could go over to Greely to take the chop saw back to Uncle Dan.”

Luke laughed. “Let me guess, he should’ve had that taken back three weeks ago when we finished with the trees.”

His mother sighed. “Why would he take it back when he can weasel me into doing it?”

“The more things change.”

“The more they stay the same.” She smiled at him. “What am I going to do without you next year?”

“Just be glad I’m here now.”

Her hand lingered as Sage dusted the little pictures on the mantel. It had become her favorite part of the task. No, her picture wasn’t included, but she liked seeing them like this. Her father and Emily, smiling, happy. She wished she remembered them like that. She wished she remembered a lot of things.

There was the one of her father and Ryder in the lake holding up a fish, and the one of Jaycee in her basketball uniform. It was probably her first as she couldn’t have been in third grade in the picture. Nostalgia for moments she hadn’t even been a part of tripped across Sage’s heart. What it would be like to be a part of a family like that, a family that went to the lake and the beach. A family that did things together. Real things. Things to take pictures of and want to remember.

Yes, they had gone that one time, but she didn’t count that. It hadn’t actually been a good memory—more awkward and uncomfortable than anything. Just like all of life was with her around.

The back door banged, and she very nearly dropped the picture she was holding of a smiling Emily holding baby Jaycee. Shaking out of the thoughts and feelings, she put it back up on the mantel and finished dusting the rest of it. Her stomach rumbling said it was past lunch, and a glance at the clock said it was nearly one. The breakfast bar hadn’t gone far, and now Sage wished she had thought to grab something so she could have disappeared into her room before anyone got back.

“Oh.” Jaycee’s short syllable jerked Sage’s gaze over to her sister who was standing by the door. “I didn’t know anybody was here.”

“It’s just me,” Sage said, stamping brightness over the melancholy.

“Great.” On her toe she turned and went back into the kitchen.

Sage let out a breath and closed her eyes. She considered going to her room, but reconsidered when her body reminded her that she was going to become a mummy in there if she didn’t eat something. So, gathering her courage, she headed for the kitchen to grab something before she had to disappear again.

Luke hadn’t bargained on the three projects Uncle Dan had needed help with. Maybe there was a reason his dad put off going to see his brother. It was nearly one when he headed back home through the dripping, depressing day that wasn’t getting any better.

Going through the kitchen to the cabinet in the other corner, Sage put the dust cloth away. She might get it back out after lunch, but only if Jaycee decided to leave, which with the way she was banging the cabinet doors was a real possibility. It was hard to be alone, but it was harder to be with anyone, and Sage was always teetering between the two ways of being utterly miserable.

“Well,” Jaycee said as she slapped her sandwich together on the counter, “I hope you’re happy.”

“Happy?” Sage asked as if she’d never heard the word. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Everyone is talking about it. Coach even said he heard about it. Not that he told me that. I heard him talking with Ms. Bryer about it when I went into the office this morning.”

Fear took hold of her as worry clutched the other way. “They were talking about me?”

“Well, they were more talking about Rory and Luke, but…”

“About the fight?”

Her sister turned. “Yes, about the fight. What else would they be talking about? The whole town is talking about it. Everywhere I go. They’re all looking at me and whispering.”

“At you?’ Every syllable went up in pitch and volume.

With that, Jaycee spun, sandwich forgotten. “Yes, about me, Sage. About us. About you, about our family. What did you think you could come here and wreck everything and no one would notice?”

“I…”

“All these little games you play. All these head games.”

“I don’t…”

“Save it. Okay? Just save it. I don’t want to hear it.” She went back to the sandwich, every movement was filled with anger and disgust as Sage stood next to the table, wrapping her arms up around herself to thwart the venom spewing from her stepsister. “You waltz in here like Queen Elizabeth without the crown and start destroying everything one by one. Things I care about. People I care about.”

“I…”

“Rory. Okay. I get that. Captain of the football team, all-around hunk. I see why you’d go for him, but why you have to go and ruin Luke’s reputation… I don’t get that. I don’t. You should have stayed where you belonged. At least there you couldn’t destroy everything here.”

Sage couldn’t even breathe much less defend herself. She knew it. He was being dragged in the middle of the muck all because of her. “I didn’t want to come here. I didn’t… they made me.”

“And you just took full advantage of that, didn’t you? Just like everything else.”

“I never…”

“Don’t say you never. You never what? Made out with Rory? Got drunk? Lured Luke here in the afternoon when everyone else was gone? Face it, Sage, you don’t care about anyone but yourself.”

Letting out a breath so she wouldn’t start crying, Sage turned for her room. “I think this was a mistake.”

“You’re the mistake!”

The words physically hit her as she headed to the doorway. Sage stopped as they tore through her, ripping shreds off of her already wounded and bleeding spirit.

“Face it, you have been a mistake from minute one! I just wish you would leave and never come back! Or better yet I wish you’d never been born.”

Slowly Sage came back around, the barbs still splitting through her heart. “I… I’m not…”

But Jaycee was shaking her head now, a hollow smile on her face as she glared at Sage. “You don’t get it, do you?”

“Get what?” Sage could barely get the words out from the tightness of her heart.

“Them. You. Why you’re even here.”

She blinked back the tears. “Because Mom sent me.”

“I don’t mean that. I mean why you’re here.” Jaycee lifted and lowered her hands as if showing Sage a statue. “Why you’re on the planet.”

Where were the words? They were somewhere and yet they never appeared.

“My dad,” Jaycee said. “Your mom.” How she could put such lurid tones on such innocent words, Sage would never know. Jaycee shook her head. “Wow. Haven’t you ever, even for a second noticed that Mom and Dad have been married 20 years? Did you not see the frame of them in the living room?”

Of course she had. She had dusted it many times. “I don’t…”

“You’re 18, Sage. Eight. Teen. They’ve been married 20 years. How hard is this to figure out?”

And then things she had never really understood began to take shape in a horrid way she knew would never again let her be at peace.

“Don’t look at me and tell me you never knew that.” Jaycee laughed. “How stupid could you possibly be?”

Stupid? That she’d never realized… She couldn’t breathe, and the tears were yanking up so vehemently, she couldn’t keep them down.

“You arrived on the planet a home-wrecker, and that’s never changed.”

Volumes of hazy, awful gray and black began to ooze over her spirit, seeping there and coloring her world so that it looked completely different now. Things she had felt. Things she had asked. And things she had never wanted to know. Suddenly, they all made vile, abhorrent, repulsive sense. So it was all her fault. All of it. “I’m… I…”

“Go back to California, Sage. Go back to your home-wrecker of a mother. You two deserve each other.”

California. Suddenly that sounded like a very, very good idea. And with only that thought, she bolted out of the kitchen, through the back room and out the back door. She could walk, she decided as she did just that. She could walk and never come back.

You’re the mistake. You’re the mistake. The words dogged her every step as the cold rain began slithering down her spine, seeping into her clothes and her spirit. So they were right. All of them. They knew what she was. Who she was. Why she was. They knew and that’s why she could never get away from it.

Her mother. She had never told her that part. Only that her father couldn’t stay with them and that he had gone back home to North Carolina. And eventually, she had accepted that and let it go. North Carolina. His home was more important than she was. It always had been. He wanted to be here more than he wanted to be with her. She got that now in ways she never had before.

They were married. He was married. He was married to Emily when…

The blackness began to take over everything else as she stumbled forward, now on the road. The road that would take her back to California, to sanity, to a reality that made some sense. But would it? Would reality ever make sense again? Never again could she go back to the not knowing, to the not understanding. Never again could she climb into innocence and believe it to be real. Never again would this secret not be her secret, to carry, to live. Never, ever again…

Luke was halfway from her place to his when he saw the figure in the midst of the mist and rain. He slowed the car, wondering who would be out walking in this weather. However, the slower he got, the more confused he became. The blonde hair. That build. That walk. It could be no one else.

Hot tears were streaming out of her eyes melding with the cold rain falling from the sky. You’re the mistake, Sage. You’re a home-wrecker, and you have been from minute one. She had never hurt like this, never felt her heart being physically being ripped out of her chest like this. How she even kept walking was a mystery. Every step reminded her that Jaycee was right. Her existence was the problem. She was the problem, and she always had been.

“Hey.” The sound of the vehicle and the voice dragged through her, but Sage didn’t stop. She couldn’t. If she did, she would surely collapse and the world would follow suit around her. “Hey! Sage! What’re you doing out here?”

And then with horror, she realized who it was, and pain she could hardly bear tore her in two. It couldn’t be. No. Not now. Not now, Luke. Please not now.

“Sage! What’re you doing out here? Where’re you going?”

She shook her head, forcing her feet to keep moving, to keep walking. He didn’t deserve this. None of them did. If she could just get away, just disappear from the fabric of their lives…

“Sage.” Luke realized simultaneously that she wasn’t going to stop and that something was bad, bad wrong. With no other thought, he threw the car into park and jumped out. Racing through the rain to where she was still stumbling forward, he caught up to her. “Sage! Sage, stop!”

Reaching out, he grabbed her arm and pulled her around unprepared for the sight that met his eyes. “Sage? What in the world?”

“Let me go.” She yanked on her elbow, trying to disengage it from his grip as she plowed her gaze into the ground at their feet. “Let me go, Luke. I’m not worth it. I’m not. Just. Let. Me. Go.”

“Sage, what happened? What’s… what’s going on?”

“It’s nothing. It’s not. Okay? Just let me go.” This time she was successful in getting her arm out of his grip, and she took two stumbling steps away from him. “Just let me go,” she said to the rain which was picking up again though she hadn’t realized it. “I’m not worth it.”

“What…? Sage. Stop.” He came abreast of her again, his hands on his beltline now. “Where are you going?”

“California,” she spat back. “And if you’re smart, you’ll let me go.”

Luke looked the situation over even as she started away from him again, and he shook his head. “Well, no one’s ever accused me of being that.” Knowing he was in for a battle, he caught up with her. “Come on. You’re coming with me.”

“What?”

But before she could get away from him again, he swept her up into his arms and settled her there.

“Luke, what’re you…? No. Put me down. Don’t!”

“I’m taking you home.”

“What?” All-out panic hit her eyes, and she kicked at him wildly. “No! I’m not going home! I’m not! Put me down! Put me down! I’m going to California!”

He was having a devil of a time keeping her in his arms. “Fine. Then we’ll go to my house.”

The look she gave him ripped his heart out. “Luke, no. Please. Don’t. You don’t want to do this. They’ll know. They’ll find out.” She was out of her head now, shaking and shivering and talking so that nothing was making any sense. “Luke, please. Don’t. Please don’t. Please.”

However, he had determined that he was the sane one here, and he was going to get her out of this weather and calmed down enough so that he could make heads or tails of what had happened. At his car, he opened the passenger’s seat and sat her there, realizing that she could just bolt again. So carefully, he reached in and buckled her seatbelt as she closed her eyes, emotions and ache quaking across her beautiful face. “Sit there,” he commanded, “and don’t you dare move.”

Satisfied that she wasn’t going to try to escape, he closed her door and ran around to his. Once inside, he considered asking but it was clear that getting her to safety was more important, so he put the car into drive and headed out into the gray sheets of rain now falling on the whole world around them.

The word mistake was on a permanent loop in her brain and heart. It went round and round and round, slicing deeper with each pass. And now she was here with Luke, and they were going somewhere. Somewhere she couldn’t remember. California crossed her mind. Yes, maybe he was taking her back to California, and she was going to wake up and this whole nightmare would be over.

However, long before he got to California, Luke stopped the car and shut it off. The whole world seemed to be shrinking in on her, collapsing in a way she’d never experienced.

“Don’t move,” he said, and she felt him gazing at her. Then he was out of the car and coming around to her side.

When he opened the door, Sage could hardly get up enough strength to unclick the seatbelt, and once she did, she sat there, spent. If she never moved again, that would be perfectly fine. But then the memory ripped through her, and the tears came up again, and she gasped at the fury of them. She shook her head as all the horrible thoughts rampaged back through her mind and spirit.

“Come on,” he said gently, and then his hand was on her elbow, turning her out of the car, helping her up from the seat. “Let’s get you inside.”

Sage followed because nothing was making any sense anymore. Where they were. Why. How. They were all a mystery to her. And then she was sitting on a couch, and he was putting a blanket over her. She looked up at him, knowing she had to get him to stop. Stop being so nice to her. Stop trying to help. He was only making things worse for himself. “Luke…”

Not listening to her feeble protests, he pulled up an ottoman and sat on it right in front of her, his knees on either side of hers. “Okay. Now, are you going to tell me what the heck happened? Why were you out walking in the rain like that? You’re going to catch pneumonia.”

“Good,” she said back, anger and hurt melting in the middle of the word. “That would sure solve a lot of problems.”

Luke let out a breath, his gaze never leaving her face. “Sage, what are you talking about? This is not making any sense.”

And then the fight to keep her horrible self from his sight left. He might as well see her for what she was. Then he would surely realize being anywhere around her was a mistake. Mistake. The word slashed through her. “I was a mistake.” She willed herself to hold his gaze. “I am a mistake.”

She spoke the words so softly that Luke thought he hadn’t heard them correctly. He sat forward, putting his hands on her thighs.

“A mistake? What do you mean you’re a mistake?”

Her gaze came up to his, now hollow and defeated. “My dad and my mom. I…” The words slipped into the quaking of her body as tears flooded over her face.

“Sage.” He abandoned the ottoman and folded himself next to her on the couch, gathering her into his arms.

“I never knew.” She shook her head, the moisture from the rain transferring onto his already-soaked T-shirt. “I didn’t. I didn’t think… They never told me.”

“Shhh.” Luke bent and kissed the top of her head. “Slow down. Who never told you?”

“My mom.” Sage sniffed. “She said my dad had to go back home to North Carolina. She never told me why.”

“Okay,” he said softly.

She exhaled hard. “He was married, Luke. My dad was married… to Emily.”

And then he saw it too, and he understood deeper than he had ever seen. “Oh, Sage.”

“I know. Right? And stupid me. I never even knew it. I never put two and two together, never even questioned it. I am such an idiot. Of course, they would be mad. Of course Emily hates me. Why wouldn’t she? I almost caused their divorce.”

“Divorce?” Luke backed up to look at her because the word stunned him so badly.

“They were talking about it the other day. I heard them.”

Then more pieces fell into place in Sage’s mind, and she wrapped her arms over themselves. “No wonder.”

“No wonder… what?”

“No wonder.” It was amazing how clear it was all becoming, like someone had opened a window on a pitch black room to reveal all that had been there forever.

“Sage, you’re not…”

“They said it.” Sage shook her head. “They were going to get a divorce, just like…” And suddenly she couldn’t breathe again. The air was going in and out, making her head swing and sway.

“Sage, calm down. Okay? Just calm…”

“He didn’t want them to,” she said like a ghost. “Dad… Dad was worried about Mom and Jason.”

The deeper they went, the less sense any of this was making.

“Worried why?” Luke asked. “What was he worried about?”

When her eyes came up to his, he had no words to put to what they were saying.

“He cheated on her.”

This was getting worse, and her confusion was starting to overtake him. “Who? Who cheated on who?”

“Oh, my…” Sage sat forward and put her face in her hands, shaking her head and fighting a battle he had no idea how to defend her from.

Gently, Luke put his hand on her back and rubbed it there, though he had a pretty good feeling that she didn’t even know he was there.

“They knew,” she said, her words like hollow tipped bullets. “They all knew. They all knew about me. They knew about my mom. They knew about everything.” And then she was standing, walking somewhere, but Luke couldn’t tell she even realized she was moving. At the wall, she stopped and just stood there. “I shouldn’t be here.”

That frightened him more than anything she had said to this minute, and he stood from the couch and went over to her. At her side, he put his arms around her and drew her to him.

“I have to leave. I can’t stay here. I can’t.”

“Sage.”

“No, Luke.” She looked up into his eyes. “I can’t. I can’t stay. I can’t put them through this. I can’t put you through this. I have to leave.”

“Okay. Okay. Hang on. Before we start goin’ anywhere.” Carefully he turned them back for the couch, walked with her there, and sat her down. He let out a breath to settle his own racing thoughts although it did no good. “Okay, first of all, I don’t think you’re going anywhere.”

Horror crashed through the crazy thoughts now spiraling through her brain, and Sage looked at him. “You. You can go back and get my stuff. Just pack it up. Get it ready. I can get a flight out. Tonight. Now.”

“Sage.” He sat on the ottoman and took her shoulders in his hands. “Listen to me, darlin’, you ain’t going anywhere like this.” He shook her softly. “You hear me? Now, I don’t know what’s happened, but we’re going to figure it out, and we’re going to fix it together.”

Her eyes came to his, wild and frantic. “No, Luke, don’t you understand? We can’t figure it out. We can’t fix it. It can’t be fixed. But if I’m not here…”

“Okay, now hold up right there. Let’s just not even talk about you not being here. First of all, your folks would freak if you just up and left.”

“No.” Her eyes searched his, desperate and out-of-control. “Don’t you see? They don’t want me here. They don’t.”

Luke exhaled slowly. “Well, maybe I want you here. You ever think about that?”

His words somehow pricked through all the blackness, and she realized that he wasn’t kidding. “No, Luke. Don’t you understand? I’m a home-wrecker. I’m bad news. I’m trash. I ruin everything and everyone who gets close enough.”

“No,” he said softly. “You don’t understand. I’m not going to just up and let you walk out of my life. I’ve done that once, and it was about to kill me.”

Sad acceptance dropped over her as she looked at him. “Luke, sweet Luke.” She put her hands on the sides of his face. “I’m no good. Go. Be with Jaycee.” That name nearly swept her under the tears again, but she beat them back for his sake. “She’s the good sister, the one who was meant to be here, the one who was meant to be with you.”

He took her hands in his and drew them down between them. “I wish you’d quit saying that.”

“Well, it’s true.” Her gaze dropped then. “It is, and everybody knows it. They all know what I am.”

Now that she was calmer at least on the outside, Luke thought maybe they had a chance of sorting some of this out. “So what happened anyway?”

Sage settled back, her hair in wet strings around her, her gaze down. “Jaycee just set me straight about how things went down, that’s all.”

“Jaycee,” he breathed. “I should have known.”

“No, Luke. It wasn’t her fault. I just… I didn’t know.”

“What did she tell you? What did she say?”

She shrugged. “That I’m a mistake. That I’ve been a mistake since minute one.”

“She said that to you?”

Sage shrugged. “It’s the truth.”

“Oh, my…” It was his turn to bolt off the couch. He took a couple steps away and raked his hand through his now-dry hair. “I can’t believe her. How could she be so mean?”

Sage was beginning to see the turmoil she was creating in his life, and she hated that for him. “Really, Luke. It wasn’t Jaycee’s fault. She just… she just said what everyone else is already thinking, that I’m….”

He turned and gazed down at her. “Don’t. Okay? Don’t take that on. That word. That’s not what you are.”

The back door banged, and Sage sat straight up as Luke’s gaze jerked that direction.

“Luke? You here?” his mother called, and Sage wanted more than ever to disappear.

Luke looked down at her and put up his hand. “Don’t move.”

Not truly believing she would do as he said, Luke glanced at the kitchen. “Yeah, I’m here, Mom.” His gaze came back to Sage. “Just stay right there.”

He dragged in a breath, praying for the words and the sanity to get through this as he went into the kitchen.

“I was wondering if you were here. Your car’s parked kind of funny.” She was at the sink, washing out asparagus.

“Yeah. How’s Hannah?”

His mother waved him off. “She’s fine. Two stitches. Probably could have made due with a butterfly.”

“That’s good.” His heart and gaze slipped back to the living room. “Listen, Mom, we need to talk.”

Her gaze came to him. “It sounds serious.”

“It is.”

On the couch, Sage wound her arms over themselves and fought not to run. She shouldn’t be here—at his house. Luke’s house. She shouldn’t have let him bring her here. He didn’t need the insanity of her life messing up his. Going sounded like a fabulous idea, but where would she go and how would she get there?

“She’s here?” his mother hissed. “Why in the world would you bring her here?”

“What did you want me to do—leave her out in the rain?” Heat boiled into his blood. “Look, Mom. I know what you probably think of her, but none of it is true. She’s been through hell and back today, and I’m not going to just toss her to the wolves.”

“You don’t think Greg and Emily can deal with this?”

“They’re part of the problem.” He leaned closer. “Did you know about her? About her mom and Mr. Lawrence?”

That took some of the direct confrontation out of his mother, and her gaze dropped to the sink. “Yeah. I knew.”

“Well, she didn’t.” Protectiveness surged forward in his spirit. “Her mom told her that her dad had gone back home. She never knew what that meant until today.”

“Look, Luke, I’m sure this must be really hard on her, but I don’t see how she is our problem.”

“Problem? She is not…” He ratcheted his voice and volume down. “She is not a problem, Mom. She’s a person. And she’s hurting and scared, and I am not going to abandon her now, and I don’t care what you think.”

Sage heard the angry voices, and although she couldn’t quite put words to what they were saying, she knew enough to know it was time for her to go. She stood, carefully holding her balance because it was swaying every which way but straight. Oh, how her heart hurt, but she pushed that down and picked her chin up.

A slow step at a time she went to the door between the living room and kitchen. If she could just get out of here…

“Oh, my!” His mother’s gaze slipped behind him, and Luke turned to find Sage standing there looking like a sopping wet, forlorn orphan. His mother’s gaze came over to him, and worry shot through her eyes before she looked back at Sage. “You’re soaking wet.”

Luke wasn’t much better, but disheveled was kind of in his nature. It was not in Sage’s, and it showed.

“I’m sorry,” Sage said with barely any volume to the words. “I should be…”

“Luke, why didn’t you get Sage some dry clothes?” his mother asked, and he heard the mothering tone. “She’s going to catch pneumonia like this.”

“I…”

“Come here, darlin’,” she continued. “I’ll make you some hot chocolate.”

“Oh, that’s okay.” Sage dragged her hand up her arm and to her elbow. “I think I’d better be going.”

Mother and son exchanged a look, and Luke knew he needed to say no more.

“No, now you listen to me,” his mother said as she crossed over to collect Sage. “My goodness you’re freezing. She’s freezing, Luke. Go get her some of Hannah’s things. Some sweatpants or jeans, maybe and a sweater.”

“No, really,” Sage said feebly as she was led into the kitchen. “I should be going. I don’t want to…”

But his mother was having none of that, and for that, Luke was thankful.

“She could take a shower,” he offered.

“Oh, I….”

“Yes. That’s a good idea. The girls’ shower has clean towels. I just put them in on Friday. Why don’t you take her? I’ll get something hot for her to drink and start supper.”

“I… really…” Sage said as Luke came to get her from his mother’s wing. “I should be…”

“No. Now you go get warmed up,” his mother said. “No arguing. I will not have you traipsing all over the country like that.”

This was not at all what Sage had had in mind.

“Really, Luke,” she said as she followed him slow step for slower step down the hallway. “I probably need to go home. They’ll be wondering where I am.”

“The girls’ bathroom is right here,” he said as if he hadn’t heard her. “Like Mom said, there’s fresh towels and shampoo and stuff in the shower. Feel free to use whatever you need.” He flipped on the light of the little pink bathroom. “I’ll get you some of Hannah’s clothes. You’re about the same size…”

“Really, Luke, this isn’t…”

“You heard Mom, no arguing. Now get in there before you really do catch pneumonia.”

“But…”

He went into the room next to the bath and flipped that light on as well. That room was pink too. Leaning on the doorframe, Sage watched him cross the room to the dresser. Why did he have to be so gorgeous and sweet and…?

“Sweatpants or jeans?” he asked.

Sage couldn’t remember ever having worn sweatpants. They reminded her of Jaycee, and that thought sent her heart skittering.

“Gonna have to be sweatpants,” he continued. “Pink or navy?”

She didn’t answer. She couldn’t. All of her energy had drained away from her body. If she could just go to sleep right here… A shiver quaked through her, and she shook with the aftershocks of it.

“Here.” He came back to her and shut off Hannah’s light. “These should help.”

The clothes landed in her hands, and Sage looked at them, unsure why she was even holding them.

“Now get,” he said, turning her and pushing her into the bathroom. “We’ll be out here when you’re done.”

That’s what she was afraid of.

Chapter 17

“I just wanted to let you know that she’s here, and she’s safe,” his mother was saying when Luke made it back to the kitchen. “Yeah, Luke found her out on the road. I don’t know, but we can bring her home…”

Her gaze jerked up to her son’s, and Luke knew the panic in his eyes told her that might not be a good idea.

“We’ll let you know. No, we don’t mind. She’s fine. Just caught a little chill from the rain. Yes. Okay. We will. Okay. ‘Bye, Em.” She beeped her cell phone off and looked at him. “She okay?”

Luke exhaled long and hard. “Well, I think that really depends on your definition of okay.”

His mother shook her head. “I knew this was going to happen when they said she was coming.”

He knew enough to know some, but now it was time to hear what had really happened. “So what’s the story with her dad anyway? I don’t get it.”

A moment and his mother came over to sit at the table. “It was a long time ago. Greg and Em were like the ‘it’ couple when they were in high school. King and Queen of everything. They were a little younger than me, but everyone knew them and liked them. High school sweethearts if ever there were two. Then they got married and moved into his grandmother’s place right down the road.”

“Where they live now?”

“Yes. Where they live now. They were close enough neighbors that they used to babysit for the girls sometimes. That’s how Em and I got to be friends.” The story wound down to a darker tone. “About a year after they were married, Greg got a job offer out in California. He wanted to take it in the worst way, but Em’s roots were here. They argued and fought, and she finally told him if he took the job she wasn’t going with him.

“Sounds kind of harsh, but that’s the way Em’s always been. A little too pig-headed for her own good. Greg just thought that job was going to change everything, and it did. He was gone for about six months, and then he called, and they patched things up. He came back, and we all thought everything was fine. It wasn’t long and Em found out she was pregnant, and they were over the moon about the baby.”

“They didn’t know about Sage?”

His mother pursed her lips and shook her head. “No.”

“So when did they find out?”

She shrugged. “About two months before Jaycee was born, Greg got the phone call. I remember it like it was yesterday. Emily called me so freaked out she could hardly talk.”

Luke knew the feeling.

“She said she couldn’t be married to a guy who would do that to her, that she was going to get a divorce.”

“What did you do? What did you say to her?”

“I did the only thing I could think to do, I told her they should at least try counseling for their baby’s sake. I couldn’t stand to see it end like that. They did, and eventually, they patched things up again.”

“But Sage, she came out here… before?”

“A couple times when she was really little, and then her mom got married, and that was the last we heard from her… at least us. I think Greg kept in touch over the years.” She shook her head. “I don’t know. It’s a mess. I just kind of thought the whole thing would fade off into the sunset never to be heard from again. Guess we couldn’t get that lucky.”

The stab to his heart made him flinch. “This isn’t Sage’s fault.”

She smiled a sad smile. “I know that, but it’s still a mess any way you slice it.”

That much he agreed with, but he thought it far more her dad’s fault than anyone’s. “Do you mind if she stays for supper?”

His mother looked at him and smiled again. “You like her, don’t you?”

Luke couldn’t argue. “You would too if you got to know her.”

Her sigh was long and slow as she shook her head. “You know what people are going to say.”

Anger slashed into his gut. “People are always saying stuff about everything. Am I supposed to live my whole life worried about what everyone else says?”

Soft patience floated through her eyes as she reached up and brushed the hair from over the scabbed-over cut. “No. But people can be mighty cruel about things like this.”

That much he was learning the hard way.

The shower really did feel good. So did the dry clothes. Sage did her best with the blow dryer and the one pick comb the girls had left. She wondered then if she had ever heard how many girls there were, what their ages might be. Some part of her remembered an older sister, the one with the child for the jacket. Was that Hannah? She couldn’t remember.

Out of desperation because her hair was not cooperating, she finally put it in a loose braid down her right shoulder. Strands were still sticking out everywhere, and it gave new meaning to the term “messy,” but with no curling iron or straightener to be seen, it was going to have to work. Figuring once she made her appearance again, they would be shipping her off for someone else to deal with anyway, she collected her clothes, shut off the light, and walked out. The kitchen light was on, and there were voices. Some tasks were just not fair to have to live through. This was one of them.

One breath and she got her feet to bounce into the bright light, and for a second, she was fine until they both looked up. She swallowed the overwhelm that threatened from every side and told her heart in no uncertain terms that she was not taking its messages. “I’m ready to go.”

That was a lie, and they all knew it. When had she gotten so terrible at lying? She used to be able to do it with no trouble.

“Oh, darlin’.” Luke’s mother stood from the table, clearly having trouble being gracious. “Why don’t you and Luke go on in the living room for a bit? I’ll just finish up supper. John should be here any minute.”

John? John?

“My dad,” Luke said when he saw the questions in her eyes. “Come on. I’ll show you around.”

Sage knew she should argue. Propriety said she should. Common sense said she should, but the feeling of safety here just wouldn’t let her. “Okay.”

For some reason Luke never quite thought about what showing her his life would be like. He’d thought so much about hers that this moment hadn’t really entered his mind. He stepped back to let her go first into the living room and then caught up to the understanding that she was holding her wet clothes up against her like a shield. “Here. Let’s put those here.”

Taking them from her, he set them next to the doorway, and when he stood and looked at her, his heart nearly flipped him off the sheer side of the what-he-wanted-to-do cliff. She looked absolutely amazing like this. Hair not perfect, face devoid of make-up, in soft, comfortable warm clothes. She looked so small and in need of protection. Somehow he hadn’t counted on that vision yanking him forward like it did. He put his hands on his beltline because if he didn’t, he was going to be in serious trouble. “Uh, well, this is the living room.”

Overwhelming vulnerability invaded Sage’s spirit. She felt like he could see all of her. Without the amazing clothes and perfect everything, what would he think of her? She knew what she would think, and the fear that he was thinking the same thing dragged her arms in front of her and her shoulders up to her ears as she followed him deeper into the room.

“This is the graduation wall,” he said pointing to the wall next to the outside door across the room. “That’s Kara, Cilla, Maddie, Hannah, and me.” He put his hand up to the back of his head and rubbed it there.

The amazing thing was how as she stood there looking, Sage began to forget herself and her own self-consciousness. “You’re the baby of the family?”

“Guilty as charged.”

She tilted her head to examine the pictures closer. They all favored each other, different shades of the same blondish-brown hair, the same nose, same eyes. “Hannah looks like you.”

“Oh, gosh. Let’s not go there.”

Sage laughed. “What? She does.”

He shook his head. “People thought we were twins for most of our lives. Still do if we happen to be somewhere people don’t know us. She hates it.”

Her gaze came up to him. “Can’t be that bad.”

“For me, not so much. For her, let’s not mention it. We’ll all be safer that way.” He looked down at her and the sheepish smile and half-shrug pulled her heart to him. “And this is the wedding wall.” The other side of the door had only a framed picture and several decorations.

“Only one?” Sage asked.

“So far. Maddie’s this close to getting engaged, but the rest of us. Well, it may take ‘em a while to fill up this one.”

Sage stepped up to the one of their family, and she pointed to it. “Is this you?”

“Oh. Uh. Yeah. I was like 13 there. They made me an usher.”

“Luke the usher.” She nodded. “It fits you. You look cute in your tux.”

“Ugh. Let’s not talk about it. I hated that thing. And they would not let me out of it the whole night. Very, very uncool.”

“I don’t know. I kinda like it.”

Something about the way she looked at him brought the blood rushing to his face. “Moving on.”

There were more pictures on the piano. He’d never realized how many there were. “These are mostly baby pictures and ones Mom just can’t get herself to put up in the closet.”

“What is this?” Sage picked up the one of him and the tuba. He looked like he was trying out for the part of a Munchkin in Oz he was so small next to that thing.

“Okay. Yeah. We’re not talking about that one.” He took it from her and set it back in its place. “No. We are never to speak of that picture again.”

Her whole face was animated and amused when she looked up at him. “I didn’t know you were musical.”

Luke looked down at her, loving how amazing it was to just stand this close to her. “I’m not.” In self-defense, he picked up a different picture. “This is Alyssa. Kara’s daughter. She’s almost four now.”

“Wow. Look at those curls.”

“Yeah, well, she’s the cute one of the bunch.”

“Well, well,” his father said, striding into the room. He was a balding man in his late fifties, still dressed in his greasy mechanics uniform. “Felicia said we had company.”

Oh, boy. Luke’s panic meter started beeping as if its life depended on it. “Uh, Dad, this is Sage. Wentworth.”

“Sage.” His father held out his hand to her as if he’d never heard a word about her, which Luke clearly doubted. “It’s nice you could join us.”

“Oh, uh, thank you, Mr. Baker.”

His father laughed. “Mr. Baker is my father. I’m John.”

It looked like it took three tries. “John. It’s nice to meet you.”

“You too. I think Felicia’s about done with supper, and I’m starving,” his father said. “What do you say we get in there before it all gets cold?”

The breathing thing was jerking and sputtering again, but Sage nodded in spite of it. “Okay.”

Mr. Baker led them, and she turned to follow him. However, the sudden realization that Luke’s hand was right at the small of her back yanked sanity there with it. What was he doing? He needed not to do that. His parents were going to know he wasn’t just her friend. He was, wasn’t he? Just her friend? She knew he wanted more, but with the swirling of her life at the moment, she wasn’t at all sure that was a good idea.

Plus, she thought as she sat down at the table carefully, didn’t they know it was her fault he’d gotten his face busted up? And just how much did they know anyway? About her, her life, and everything else? Under the bright lights of the kitchen, she started to panic. This was hardly how you wanted to be introduced to parents. Candlelight dinner at a five-star restaurant with everyone dressed to the nines and beyond. Not Monday night supper with everyone in their work clothes and her in… well, this.

“Shall we pray?” his father asked, and he put his hands out to the sides of him.

Sage’s panic meter went off the charts. What was this? What was she supposed to do? “Oh. Uh,” she said when she saw Luke take his mother’s hand and hold his out to her. Jerky and uncertain, she put her one hand in Luke’s and the other one in John’s, feeling the earth go spinning off its axis again. It was a good thing they were holding on to her.

“Thank You, God,” John said, bowing his head, “for this food and this family. God bless and protect all those who are not here with us, and those who have joined us this evening. We put today, tomorrow, and every day in Your hands, Lord. Amen.”

Was it a conspiracy? They both squeezed her hands lightly before letting go, and suddenly her hands felt very, very cold. Sage retrieved her hands, suddenly more self-conscious than she had ever been in her life.

Luke could tell how uneasy she was, and he hated that. However, the only girl who’d ever shared a meal with them other than his sisters was Jaycee, and Jaycee was more like one of the sisters. This didn’t feel like that—at all.

“So, Sage,” his father said as they began dishing out the meal, and Luke started praying prayers of his own like Please, God, don’t let him embarrass me. “You’re a senior?”

“Going to be, Sir.” She grabbed up her napkin and wiped her lips and then brushed some hair from her face. Oh, how he loved that face. Somehow every time he saw it, he fell just a little bit harder.

“Have you decided plans after that?” his dad asked.

“Uh, no. Not really.”

“Sage loves design,” Luke said, knowing she was going to probably kill him for it when they were alone again, but more than anything, he wanted his parents to see the Sage he knew.

“Design?” his mother asked as if she was really impressed. “Like what fashion?”

“Uh. No.” Sage was curling in on herself. Luke could see it from his seat.

“More like interior,” he said for her as he passed the potato casserole around. “Like rooms and stuff.”

“Really?” his mother asked again, passing the asparagus to her husband. “Like painting and pillows?”

Sage looked one syllable away from panicking. “Well, I haven’t really…”

“She was telling me about this room she designed for… what was it? Art class,” he said as if he didn’t know she was running from the topic. “Blues and greens, right?”

Heat surged over Sage. How did he remember that? Why would he remember it? “Uh, yeah, but it was only on paper.”

“You know, I’ve been thinking about repainting Hannah’s room,” his mother said, and Sage was beginning to doubt her own sanity. This was not happening. She was not sitting in Luke Baker’s kitchen talking room colors with his mother. “That room has been that awful Pepto-Bismol pink since she was in second grade. I really think it’s time to update it a bit.”

Somehow Sage had never seen herself as an expert in the topic, but she was interested. “So what colors were you thinking?”

“I don’t know. I really want something that’s kind of neutral so we can use that room as a guest bedroom for when Kara and Josh come.”

“Like taupe or camel brown?” Sage asked. “You could do an ice blue with that for the curtains, and it would look really upscale.”

A smile spread through Luke as the two of them continued to talk. Finally, blessedly the real Sage Wentworth had entered the world, and she was glorious.

As supper wound down, Sage had the oddest feeling of her life. It was like wispy warm cotton candy wrapped in hot chocolate and clouds. Safety. Love. Belonging.

When Luke’s mom stood to clear the dishes, Sage jumped up. “Oh, let us get these. Please.”

His mother’s skeptical gaze came over to her. “You don’t have to do that.”

“I know,” she said, and as crazy as it sounded, love for this woman she had just met soaked through her. “But Luke here needs all the practice he can get.”

His gaze yanked up to hers. “What? Now that was uncalled for.”

His mother laughed. “I will be the first to say I agree with you about that one.”

Sage gathered two plates. “Really. We can get this. Supper was wonderful.”

“Well, thank you, Sage,” his mother said, nodding and then looking at him with a smile.

“You’re welcome.”

When his parents had vacated the kitchen, Luke stood to join Sage who was already taking dishes to the sink. He picked up several and brought them over to her.

“I thought you didn’t do dishes,” he said, leaning toward her.

“Only when I’m with you,” she said, and her gaze came up to his and locked there. His heart skittered through his chest, and he very nearly dropped the dishes. Dropping her gaze, she started the water and pushed the sleeves of the sweatshirt up to her elbows.

He gathered more dishes and brought them over, making two more trips before the table was cleaned. She was already putting soap into the water, and Luke was having trouble keeping his gaze and hands off of her. No one should look that good doing dishes.

“Okay,” she said when he had come on the other side of her to rinse them, “now no lying over dishes.”

Luke grabbed a dish towel and bit his lip. “Uh. Oh.”

“It’s amazing, right?” she asked, her gaze down on the soapy water.

“What’s that?” His gaze stayed right on her although her hair was all he could see.

“Being in a family, being here your whole life. It’s amazing right?”

His heart heard what she was really asking. “It has its upsides and its downsides like everything else.” He reached in and got a dish to dry it.

“Yeah, but would you trade it?”

No, but I’ll share it. He looked down at her. “No. I wouldn’t.”

The dishes were done, and Sage knew she should be going home but the thought of that place made her want to stay here all the more. They left the kitchen, and when Luke hit the light, Sage was imminently aware of the dimness of the living room.

“You a Sox fan?” Luke’s dad asked from his chair where he was reading a farming magazine, his glasses perched on his nose.

“Oh, uh, no, Sir.” Sage picked her hand up to her arm. “I don’t know much about baseball.”

“Well, then it’s about time you learn.”

Luke lifted his shoulder in apology and smiled a grimace at her. She couldn’t tell him, but just being included felt better than she ever thought it could even if they were talking baseball.

“Sit. Sit,” his father said, and he pointed at the television. “Now the guys in red, those are the good guys. The guys in the white with the blue pin stripes, those are Satan.”

Sage laughed at the dire tone in his voice. “Okay.”

On the couch, she sat and Luke sat right next to her, so close, there really wasn’t space for both of them. He looked at her, a question running through his eyes, but before she could figure out the extent of it, he picked his arm up and laid it around her shoulders.

All she could think as she snuggled in next to him was how much she adored baseball.

Luke knew better than maybe anyone else how much of a toll the emotions of the day had taken on her. So he wasn’t at all surprised when she began to nod off in the sixth inning. Scooting down onto the couch, he shifted her so that she slipped down and onto his thigh. A second to get settled, and her movements stopped.

Casually, as if he’d done it a million times, he let his hand fall to her shoulder and his fingers brush through the wayward strands of hair. Life had never been so perfect.

Chapter 18

“Sage… Sage.”

Haze and sleep twined around her. She was so warm. Everything was so warm. “Hmmm.”

“Hey, darlin’.”

“Hmm.” Her eyes came open to find Luke grinning down at her.

“The Sox won.”

Sage fought not stretch or yawn but didn’t win either battle. Then she relaxed back into the warmth and closed her eyes. It was heavenly. Finally, she yawned again and forced herself up and off of his leg. Odd, she couldn’t really remember how she had gotten there. Sitting forward, she rubbed her eyes and looked down at her attire, wondering and then remembering why she was so warm. “Oh. Wow. How long was I out?”

Gently he rubbed his hand up and down her back, and Sage thought with him doing that, she might just forget life and go back to sleep again.

“Three innings.”

That was helpful, but she laughed it off, dragging her shoulders up and yawning again. Then life began to come back to her, and she sighed. “I should be getting home.”

The grin left and Luke nodded. “Yeah. I can take you when you’re ready.”

When I’m ready? How about never?

His parents told her goodnight and then told him not to be gone too long. Luke kept a careful eye on her as they went to the car to get in. Once there, he shut her door and went around to his side. He wished there was more than three-quarters of a mile between his place and hers. Figuring out what came next would surely take a lot more than that.

Getting in, he started the car and then glanced over at her as worry began to lace its way through him at how fragile she looked. “You okay?”

Her gaze turned to him. “I’m trying to be.”

He nodded, understanding more than she probably thought he did. Backing up and heading for the road, he glanced at her again. “So do you want me to come in with you?”

More than anything, she thought before she could rein it in, but she knew she couldn’t ask him to put his neck on the line for her. “I’d hate for them to blame you for this.”

“For what? For taking care of you? If I get blamed for that, blame away.”

She looked at him. “You know what I mean. They aren’t always reasonable about things. I don’t want you to get into trouble too.”

With that he reached over and took her hand. “Long as I’m with you, that’s all that matters.” Softly he kissed the back of her hand and then let both of them drop between them before spinning the car into her parents’ drive.

One glance was all it took to see the kitchen light shining in the darkness. Sage exhaled. This was not going to be pleasant.

True to his word, Luke parked, shut the car off, and went around to help her out. His hand grasped hers and did not let go.

“Luke,” she said as they headed up the walk, “really, you don’t have to do this.”

“I know.”

One final breath and she opened the backdoor, praying everyone would be in bed, knowing they weren’t. It was only his hand that kept her moving forward and into that kitchen. Willpower was pitiful in the face of this.

Sure enough, both parents were in the kitchen. Her father at the table; her stepmother at the cabinet. On their entrance, both looked up and electric shock would have hurt less. Her stepmother glanced down at their hands and shook her head almost without moving it.

“Well,” she finally said, looking at Sage, “I can’t wait to hear this one.”

“Em,” her father said, “let’s hear her out.”

However, no one said anything. Sage knew she was supposed to, but she couldn’t catch a single thought anywhere in her head. “Uh. I’m… sorry.”

“Sorry.” Her stepmother put a stamp on the word with nod. “You leave without telling anyone where you’re going, and you show up hours later with ‘sorry’?”

“Sage was at our house,” Luke offered, and Sage’s heart hurt for him. He was so kind-hearted, he had no idea the firestorm he was walking into. “My mom called and told you. I heard her.”

Emily’s gaze came over to him and narrowed. “I would have thought you, of all people, would have more sense than this.” She shifted her gaze to Sage. “Go to your room.”

“My…”

“Now!”

Moving without ever looking up at him, Sage let go of his hand and padded away from him to the door, her damp clothes once again up like a shield in front of her—doing no good to protect her at all. As she disappeared, Luke wondered why that felt like it might be the last time he would ever see her again. However, when she was gone, he stood his ground and faced her stepmother.

“I don’t know what you heard,” he said with a solidity under the words, “but what happened today was not Sage’s fault.”

“Not her fault? You’ve got to be kidding me. Grow up, Luke,” Emily said. “She’s using you. Can’t you see that?” Emily wound her arms at her middle. “Tell your mom thanks for letting us know, but we can handle things from here.”

Fury began a slow boil in his gut, and he held her gaze for a long moment. “I know you want it to be, but none of this is Sage’s fault.” Then he dropped his gaze to the figure at the table. “Isn’t that right, Mr. Lawrence?”

The man’s gaze came up to his and sadness and desperation were written there.

“I think you should go on home,” Emily said. “It’s late. I don’t want your mom to worry.”

Luke glanced at the empty doorway and vowed to text her the second he got in the car. “Tell Sage I said goodnight.”

“Yeah, I’ll be sure to.”

In her room, Sage ran her hands up and down the sleeves of the sweatshirt. It was still so warm although her spirit was now freezing. When the knock sounded on her door, she took a breath, let it out, and opened the door. Luke was gone now. She could feel it.

“Could you come out here a minute?” her stepmom said. “We need to talk to you.”

Luke had the phone in his hands before he even got to the car. Typing, praying, and glancing back at that door, he was a jumble of movement. They wouldn’t hurt her, would they? Why didn’t her father say something? Anything? Would he just sit there and let her stepmother rip her to shreds? And where in the world was her mother in all of this? Didn’t she know what was happening? Didn’t she care?

“Now, I have tried to be patient with you,” Emily said clearly straining to control her voice, “but for you to walk out of this house and throw yourself on the good graces of our neighbors…”

“I didn’t throw myself at anyone,” Sage said with pleading in her voice. “I just…”

“You didn’t call. You didn’t text.”

“I didn’t have my phone! It’s been right there in my room all day long.”

“Luke knows the phone number.”

“He said his mom called. He said it. He stood right there just now and told you that.”

“And dragging Felicia and John into this too. What they probably think of us by now.”

Hurt was beginning to take over Sage’s good sense. “They were nice to me. They fed me supper and we watched the game.”

“The game? Oh, I’ll just bet you watched the game.”

“We did! The Sox won. They’re the ones in the red!” Why any of this was important, Sage couldn’t tell, but she hated being made to feel like a liar when she wasn’t one. “Luke and I did the dishes, and…”

“Luke and I? Oh. There will be no Luke and I, do you hear me?”

“Why not?” Now her sanity was tilting away from her for real.

“Because Luke Baker is a decent human being and you’re….” One syllable away from something synonymous with trash, Emily stopped. “Luke Baker and his family are decent, God-fearing people. They do not need you making a mess out of things for them too.”

The fight left Sage then, only gaping hurt remained. “I want to go home.”

“Well, I would like nothing more than to send you there, but apparently, we’re stuck with you for the next month. Not that any of us is happy about that.”

Sage nodded, seeing clearly now where she stood. It was all her fault, and nothing would ever change that. “I’m sorry. About everything.” And her gaze came up to her stepmother’s that was full of fury.

“Well, you should be.”

Luke sent another text and another when he got home. He was so intent on the cell phone that he was surprised by his mother waiting in the darkness for him in the kitchen.

“You get Sage home?” she asked.

“What?” He pulled up short, took a second to think, and sent the message before moving again. “Yeah. Yeah, I got her home.”

“Good.” His mother sighed. “Come. Sit.”

Uh. Oh. Luke did as requested, wishing Sage would just text him back. One text so he knew she was all right. He needed to know she was okay more than he needed the next breath and truth be told, he wouldn’t breathe again until he knew.

“Luke, honey, we really need to talk.”

“Okay.”

“Look, I know you think you like Sage.”

Anger prickled into him. “I don’t think it, Mom. I know it.”

She let out a sigh. “But Luke, honey, let’s face it, you’re just a kid from the sticks of North Carolina. She’s from California. Hollywood. She’s very good at playing these kinds of games.”

“She’s not playing a game with me, Mom. She’s not. I know it.”

“I know. I know you think that. I know you do, but you’re not exactly experienced with girls.”

“Mom…”

“No. Luke. Okay you’re my baby boy, and I don’t want to see you hurt. That’s part of it, but face it, this has trouble written all over it.”

“I thought you liked Sage.”

“I did… she sat here and she played a very convincing part for one meal.”

“That wasn’t a part, Mom. That was her. That was Sage.” He stood and went over to the cabinet where he hunched. “I’ve seen her play a part, and she’s very, very good at it. But that was her. That was the real Sage.”

“People shouldn’t be able to turn real and fake off and on like that, Luke. They shouldn’t. They learn that, and she’s probably learned it really well.”

He wanted to scream at her, but he knew that would fix nothing. Slowly he turned, leaned on the cabinet, and wrapped his arms over themselves. “I’m worried about her.”

That stopped his mother. “What do you mean?”

Probably he shouldn’t go there, but the fight in their kitchen had unsettled him in ways he couldn’t articulate. “Mrs…. Mrs. Lawrence. She hates Sage.”

“Oh, come on. Emily couldn’t…”

“No. I’m telling you, Mom. She hates her, like I-want-you-dead kind of hate.”

“Luke, listen to yourself. This is Jaycee’s mom you’re talking about.”

“And Jaycee’s just like her. She’s been spiteful and mean ever since Sage got here.”

“Okay, hang on there. So you’re telling me that these two that you have practically considered family your whole life, and suddenly they’re angry, and Sage had nothing to do with it?”

“She showed up,” he said, anger biting into his tone. “She’s alive, and they are never going to forgive her for that.” He looked at his mother through the darkness. “Can you imagine that, Mom? Can you imagine someone thinking life would be so much better if you had never been born?

“I mean, what do you even do with that? Where do you go with that?” The beep in his pocket brought him up short, and he dug out the cell. “That’s Sage.” He swiped the screen, and a knife went through his heart. “Great. And we’re back to square one.”

Sage couldn’t let herself feel anything after sending the short text. Thanks for everything. Bye, Luke.

He would probably reply, so she shut the thing off and collapsed onto the bed. It would surely be her prison and her only respite for the next month if she made it that long.

Tuesday was impossible. Luke texted and called repeatedly, only to get no reply and the voicemail. They probably took her phone away. The way things ended the night before, she might never get the thing back. Trying to get his mind off of it lest it make him truly crazy, he took the bench to Mr. Riley’s and went to Randy’s to scope out what he would need for the hutches.

It was the two times driving by their place that nearly did him in. What he wouldn’t give to stop in there, take her in his arms, and never, ever look back.

Really her room wasn’t so bad. If they would just slide bread and water under the door, it would be even better. That would solve a lot of problems. Once, Sage snuck out and made it all the way to the kitchen door before hearing the voices, and just like that, she raced back for her room.

It was an hour before she got up the nerve to try again, and she only succeeded in getting some ham and a breakfast bar before the voices in the living room told her she had run out of time. Running for her room, she barely made it, and shutting the door, she leaned against it and closed her eyes. Only 37 more days of this. Only 37 more days. Could she make it that long?

Sage was more surprised than anyone at the knock on her door on Wednesday evening. Who was that and what could they possibly want?

“Yes?” she asked, and she had to clear her throat because she hadn’t spoken for nearly 48 hours. Syrupy sweet. She could always count on that.

“Sage, we’re leaving in fifteen minutes,” Jaycee said, and Sage could hear the bend of her sister’s knee and her hand on her hip.

“Uh, leaving?” Might she have the whole house to herself? The thought was too glorious to think.

“Yeah. The fireworks thing. Mom said to be ready.”

That split through her with confusion. “Ready? Me? I’m not…”

“I didn’t ask if you were going. I’m telling you we’re going. Get ready.”

It seemed the height of insanity to be out here on a vacant field celebrating when he hadn’t heard from her in 48 hours. Why did everyone else seem to think it should be so easy and logical to just go on as if he’d never heard the name Sage Wentworth? Ugh. It was making him crazy. Luke checked the cell again. Nothing.

Why did he think it would be any different than the last 52 million times he had checked?

At the last second Sage grabbed her cell phone off the desk. The last thing she wanted was to be reamed out for getting separated and not calling them. In the van as the others talked about the coming evening, she sat in the back, scrolling through message after message. Why didn’t he just give up? Any sane guy would.

The rain had washed the hillside in green, and Luke found a spot just off center from where the main display would happen. He’d been doing this since he was a child, so he had it all pretty well figured by now. Everyone would come, bring their blankets, scatter out, watch the show, and then pack it all up and fight the crowd out of the gates and back home.

It was a tradition, strange as that sounded. His parents were somewhere in the melee he was sure, but he hadn’t come with them. That’s what getting older and having your own transportation did for you. Freedom or at least a modicum of it.

Folding himself onto the grass between two people with radios, he let his gaze slide over the others. He was sure if he looked hard enough he might find someone to sit with, but he wasn’t sure that would even be worth it. There were still questions floating around that he couldn’t answer and others he didn’t want to hear asked.

The fading of the sunlight brought on the little overhead portable amber lights and the flashlights. Some people were smart enough to plan ahead like that. He couldn’t be counted as one of them. That was okay. He didn’t need good lighting or a blanket or friends. However, he would take one friend, not that he could be so lucky.

The Lawrence crew poured out of the van and headed in disparate directions.

“Meet back here right after,” Mrs. Lawrence called after them, but if they heard her, they didn’t respond.

Sage tugged at her sweatshirt, okay, Hannah’s sweatshirt, wondering what her place in all of this was. She had no idea. It wasn’t that they wanted her here, so why not just leave her at home? Good question, but one she didn’t dare ask.

“Well, go on,” Mrs. Lawrence waved her away. “You don’t have to sit with us.”

That was both welcome and horrifying. “Oh. Okay.” She turned and carefully avoided the cars parked all over the field. On the downhill slope, she held her balance very tightly. The last thing she needed was to face plant in front of the whole town.

Strange how even out here, in the almost darkness, she felt the watching eyes and the whispers. They would never leave her alone. She knew that now. Picking her chin up and pulling at the bottom of the sweatshirt, she made her way to one small vacant plot of land. Families, people, teenagers, children they all milled about, laughing and talking. In the midst of them, Sage sat down, feeling utterly invisible.

With one glance, Luke sat up. Twenty yards away off to his left, but it was her. Definitely her. He looked around, behind her, in front of her, all around her. No one. No one that she would know anyway. His gaze fused to her as she stepped between and around a few people before she sat down on the grass, and his heart assessed everything about her.

She pulled her knees up to her chest and held them there. The jeans curved perfectly. All he wanted to do was get up and go over there and sit with her, but his gaze swept the town scattered out around them. Her parents were surely here, and Jaycee too. Luke took it all in even as he watched her, sitting there in a sea of people all alone. A moment and thought struck him.

Probably not, but maybe…

Sage was trying her very best to blend in and not be conspicuous about sitting out here all by herself. She was glad for the sweatshirt because the wind had picked up a bit, and there was a hint of the remembrance of rain. Just as she leaned back trying to figure out where the fireworks might start, her phone beeped.

Great. Here five minutes and she was already in trouble. She dug it out of her pocket and swiped it on. Hey, beautiful.

Luke. Sage didn’t think it all the way through before she looked up and around for him. Not spotting him, she bent over the phone.

Are you here?

Look behind you.

She read the message and then very carefully turned so she was looking back and to her right. Why couldn’t she stop the smile when she saw him? It made her sad for him to be that close and yet so very far away. Going back to her cell phone, she typed, Nice night for fireworks.

They let you out of the house?

Let me? I was forced to come at gunpoint.

Gunpoint?

Okay, not quite gunpoint, but my coming was not exactly optional.

They mad?

Not happy.

About?

Me.

Luke read her message, loving that she was finally talking to him again but hurting for the raw deal life had dealt her. Mind if I join you?

That message about had her running for the exits, and she typed her answer frantically. Don’t, Luke. Seriously. Not here. Not like this. She typed it, sent it, and turned around to look at him as he got it and read it.

Not like this, he read once and then twice. Not like what? Not like they liked each other? Not like she meant something to him? Not like… He looked up and caught her gaze. She shook her head with a sad, soft smile. Not like this flowed through her eyes. He had seen that smile before, and he knew what it meant.

When she turned back around, Luke considered sending her another message, and then he decided this one should be delivered in person.

Gluing her gaze to the display area, Sage forced air into and out of her lungs as she rocked back and forth, trying to dissipate the sadness and hurt surging through her. How she wished he could come and join her, but they both knew better. They did. They both knew it was better this way…

“This seat taken?”

Sage turned with a snap, saw the boots, the jeans, and her gaze jerked up to him standing there, outlined in the amber light. “Wh…?”

“I said.” He put one hand on the ground and just like that he was sitting right next to her. “Is this seat taken?”

Backing up as fast and as far as the crowd would let her, Sage looked at him in horror. “Luke, what’re you doing?”

He shrugged and looked at the front. “What does it look like? I’m watching me some fireworks.”

Well, that was certainly one way of putting it, Sage thought as her gaze snapped around them. Oh, yes, other people had already seen. She spun her arms in front of her to ward off what they were clearly surmising.

“You need to go,” she said, shaking her head. “Now before anyone sees you.”

“Eh.” He waved that away. “It’s going to be dark soon. Besides, they’ll get over it.”

“No, seriously, Luke, you should leave. I don’t want everyone to be talking about you too.”

“Well, if they really want to talk, we could give them something to talk about.” He looked at her and bounced his eyebrows, and Sage felt herself gasping at the thought. “Look, I’m right here.” Reaching over he took her hand in his. “Right where I want to be.”

Her gaze fell to his hand now entwined in hers. It was so warm, so amazing. “Luke…”

“Sage,” he said softly, and she had no defense against that voice. Her gaze came up to his eyes, and worry for him coursed through her.

“Look, I’m not a jock,” Luke said as if he wasn’t sure she didn’t know that. “I’m not a braniac. In fact, I’m kind of a loser if you want to know the real truth. But I’m still here right now with the prettiest girl here, and I’m not leaving.”

Sage’s heart melted for him. How could he think such a thing? “You’re not a loser. Don’t ever say that.” She let out a breath and shook her head. “The truth is, I really don’t want you to leave. I really want to watch the fireworks with the nicest guy here.”

He tilted his head and smiled. “Okay. Then let’s watch us some fireworks.” Carefully he turned and laid down on the ground just as the lights snapped off around them.

What to do. How to do it. And then he took hold of her and pulled her down into the crook of his arm. Sage curled there having never felt so safe or loved.

“Ah, yeah,” he breathed. “Much better.”

Chapter 19

At the first pop, Sage jumped and then giggled as she arched her head to watch the spray of gold light the night sky. “Oh, wow. Cool.”

Luke loved fireworks, but they could hardly hold his attention. Tonight, there was something even more amazing to watch, and she was right next to him, her body shadowing his as she gazed up—the green and blues sparkling in her eyes.

“Oh, that one was pretty.”

He smiled, absolutely loving this moment and the feel of her and being with her.

“Oh, look at that one.” She pointed up and to the right as the faint music to accompany the fireworks drifted over them from the various radios around now tuning in for the show. “I love the blue ones.”

The thing that amazed him the most was how much she delighted in the simple things—washing dishes, blue fireworks. Never would he have believed that Sage Wentworth would be out here, after dark, laying in a field, oohing and aahing over slapdash, cheap fireworks set off by a bunch of hicks from the sticks off a trailer bed. This was about as far away from Hollywood and Rodeo Drive as you could get.

“Look. Look.” She pointed to the left as another spray of light danced in the sky. “I love that one.”

Luke’s gaze slid down to her as her hand alighted on his chest. He was falling in love too, and it wasn’t with the fireworks.

Sage was sad when the finale faded from the sky, leaving the world in darkness again. She hated the darkness. It scared her because it always held the unknown of what came next. Knowing one of those things was disentangling herself from him, Sage picked herself up, feeling every molecule of her skin that had melded with his. Crazy how warm she could be one moment and how utterly ice-cold the next.

She brought her hand up to her arm in the place that was now chilled, and backed away from him as the lights around them flickered back on. “That was really great.”

“Who knew, right?” he asked, swinging himself up and resting his elbow on his knee as he looked at her.

Suddenly she knew how disheveled she must be, and she ran her hand over her hair. “Oh, wow. I must be a mess.”

“You’re beautiful. As always.” Luke leaned forward and for one insane second she thought he was going to kiss her. Instead he stood, dusted his jeans off and reached down for her hand. “Do you know where your folks are?”

Reality, which had a way of doing that to her, crashed back in. Sage let him pull her up and then dusted herself off and ran her hand over her hair again. “No clue. But I’d better get back to the van if I don’t want to get reamed out again.”

Luke sighed, and she knew he remembered. “Okay. Well, then we need to get you back.” And with that he reached over and took her hand.

Panic surged on her. Why did he keep doing that? Out here where everyone could see them? And now the lights were on. “Um.” She glanced down at their hands, folded together, loving how it felt but knowing he was asking for major trouble doing that.

However, he looked at her as if he had no clue of the ramifications of being seen with her. “What?”

She wanted to tell him, wanted to say, Please leave me alone for your sake. Her gaze tripped around them to the others now gathering blankets and kids. “You don’t have to. I’m sure I can find them.”

There were just certain times in a man’s life when he knows walking away would be the easy path but not the right one. This was one of those times. “Or I can spend a few more minutes with you, and we can find them together.”

Gratefulness, the depths of which Luke could hardly fathom, went through her eyes, and he smiled at her. “Come on.” And not letting her go, they headed out to find her parents.

They made it to the van before anyone else mostly because Luke knew it better than his own mother’s car. For that, Sage was eternally grateful because she’d have still been out here looking when it was the only one left. Vehicles snaked everywhere around them, headed for the two side gates in a not very well choreographed dance.

“So,” Luke said when they were beside it, one hand in hers the other in the pocket of his jeans.

Sage was one second from saying thank you, you’re wonderful, and can you never leave again when she heard the loud laughter coming their way. His gaze jerked that direction and hers followed. Jaycee and someone Sage didn’t know. Pain stabbed through her heart. So this was how perfection ended. She retrieved her hand from his, putting it on her other elbow, and he looked down at her as his hand went to his beltline.

“Luke?” Jaycee said, walking up and looking back and forth between them, clearly fighting to hide her dismay and disgust.

Jumping in was not a question, and Sage did it before she even had time to think. “Oh, I ran into him on the way back out here. He was helping me find the van. You know how easy it is for me to get lost.”

The scowl on Luke’s face as he twined his arms in front of him and stared at her sent messages Sage could neither handle nor hold, so she focused instead on Jaycee’s friend. Sticking her hand out, she smiled. “I’m Sage by the way.”

“Rachel,” the girl said, looking from her to Luke and back again.

“It’s great to meet you, Rachel. Did you enjoy the fireworks?”

As he watched her, all Luke wanted to do was grab her, drag her around the van and tell her she didn’t have to do that. He hated this game, and his mother’s words about not turning on and off who you really were coursed through his being.

“We didn’t have this kind of thing in California,” Sage was saying, and with every fiber he hated that sugary-sweet quality to her voice. It was too bubbly. Too cheerful. “We did go out to Anaheim Stadium a couple of times, but the crowds there make this look sane.”

Rachel looked star struck. Jaycee looked half a second away from killing her sister.

“Oh, good.” Her parents and Ryder came around the front from the other direction, and Luke wanted to scream Enough already!

Instead, he took another step away from her, raked his fingers through his hair, and ducked his gaze. This was impossible.

“Did everyone enjoy the fireworks?” Mrs. Lawrence said, smiling at them as if she hadn’t wanted him dead two days before.

Why could he see it all so clearly now? The play-acting? The fake smiles, the phony cheerfulness? Had it always been like this? He couldn’t tell, but it was like seeing the flip side of the mirror where it all resembled real but was all backwards.

“They were great,” Rachel said.

“Awesome,” Jaycee said, but her tone was flat.

“Well, we’d better get going,” Mrs. Lawrence said. “It’ll be midnight before we get out of here.”

Luke wanted to say that leaving now was kind of pointless. All they were going to do was sit in traffic for an hour. He’d much rather they stay out here, so he could put his arms around Sage again and feel hers around him. One piece of him absurdly thought about asking if he could bring her home, but that would invite a fate worse than death, and he knew it. “Well, I’d better be getting too.”

Where he would go and why drifted through him, but his presence was making everyone uncomfortable. It was time to exit the situation as gracefully as possible. His gaze lingered on hers when it snagged here, and that same sad, soft smile slipped over to him. With everything in him, he hated this.

Her father was loading lawn chairs and the small cooler in the back as Sage backed up so Luke could leave without getting anywhere near her. However, as he crossed to the back, her father said, “Luke?”

And Luke stuck out his hand. “Drive careful, Mr. Lawrence.”

A second and her father shook the proffered hand. “You too.”

“I will. See ya.” With that Luke put his hands on his beltline and headed out across the dwindling parking lot, off into the darkness, and once again, Sage was left hating that darkness.

In his car, Luke knew it really was pointless to go anywhere. Give it 15 to 20 minutes, and then it would be okay. Sitting there in the dark, he rewound the tape of the evening, smiling at some parts, shaking his head at others. She was so amazing. Why wouldn’t she let anyone else see that?

We did go out to Anaheim Stadium a couple of times, but the crowds there make this look sane. Why did she have to do that? Why make California sound so much better when he knew the truth, or at least some of it? Unless that wasn’t real either. The thought scratched through his mind twice, and knowing he wasn’t going to like the answer, he dug out his phone.

She probably wouldn’t answer his question, but he needed to know.

Sage had just gotten comfortable in the backseat of the van when her phone buzzed. Surreptitiously she pulled it out, swiped it on, and set the light to as dim as possible before reading his message.

Have you ever watched the fireworks in Anaheim?

Her heart fell as she stared at the message. Of all the things in the world he could ask, that was not what she had expected. What could she say? Lie or tell the truth and let him know she had lied? The choice began closing in on her.

As she held the phone, it vibrated again and another message slid over that one.

Sage, I want to know. Have you ever watched the fireworks in Anaheim?

She put her head back and over onto the seat, let out a breath, and typed the two letters, knowing he was going to hate her.

No.

It came in, blinking, and Luke shook his head and exhaled hard. How much of her was fake? Was any of her real?

But we did go out to Disney once.

For some reason, the messages kept coming. One at a time like a faucet that someone forgot to turn off, and he just let them come, reading, trying to understand.

I got sick before the fireworks though, so we had to go home.

Sometimes we had a few in the park.

I went with Pate and Mac last year to Pate’s family’s out in the valley. They did fireworks.

His heart throbbed with every single message until he could take it no more. Carefully he typed a message back to her.

In the darkness of the back, Sage felt the desperation of him not saying anything all the way until his message came in.

Why didn’t you tell them that?

She closed her eyes, fighting the crushing feeling of him knowing. I couldn’t.

Why not? Why is reality not good enough?

Because they barely like me the way it is. If they knew…

If they knew what? What are you so afraid of everyone else seeing?

Me?

Luke read the syllable, and it knifed him to the core. Before he could respond another message came in.

I know you don’t understand, and I’m sorry. Really, I am. I just don’t think I can be who you want me to be.

I want you to be YOU!

Sage read it and then read it again. Her heart slid through her chest as stinging tears pooled in her eyes. Be YOU? She didn’t even know who that was, who he was asking her to be? She was doing her best to be Sage, and she was already failing miserably at that. How was she supposed to be someone she didn’t even know how to be? The masks were beginning to feel very heavy and awkward.

Leaning over, she put her head on the window and looked out at the snaking red lights like a trail of glowing ants making their way to the gates. She sighed, knowing he would never understand. Her phone buzzed in her hand, dragging her gaze down to it.

Talk to me.

Hurt cut through her, and she tipped the thing over to type.

I don’t know how to be what you want me to be.

Strangely, that felt like the first real thing she had said.

You really don’t know who that is, do you?

A moment and the message came in.

No.

It was the moment that Luke decided to stop pressing her to see what he saw. How he would ever show her, he had no idea, but he determined right then that he would not let the fake Sage win. “God, You’re going to have to help me here.”

On the keys, his fingers typed.

Well, believe me, she’s amazing, and I had an amazing time with her tonight. I can’t wait until I get to see her again. Could you tell her that for me?

The tears began to fall for real then, and Sage tapped the keys. I think you just did.

Over the next two days, Sage would get random texts, and every one made her shake her head at him, at his sense of humor, and at his doggedly not letting her sink into misery not to mention his soft insistence that she was amazing. Funny, she’d always wanted to be amazing. But secretly, she had always suspected that if anyone ever scratched below the surface, they would know how truly un-amazing she was.

On Friday, her heart jingled with the text bells, and she jumped up from the sewing machine to answer it. She had taken to sewing little things—a heart in a small pillow, a denim patch supply holder she’d seen once on the Internet and had always wanted to try but had never had time. Grabbing up the phone, she swiped it on, feeling like a starving dog when someone put out the food.

That was ridiculous one part of her said. How desperate and silly was she, feeling like this? But she couldn’t help it, and behind that closed door of her room, she wasn’t even going to try.

You going tonight?

Her worry shields came up. Going? Where?

Bonfire.

Sage watched the cursor blinking, waiting for her answer. It could only be one thing, and she knew it. As much as she wanted it to be something else, something else for her was not safe nor sane.

No.

Luke nodded, figuring as much. He typed back, letting it at that.

Okay.

Sage’s heart fell, and tears sprang into her eyes as she sat down hard on the bed. “I’m sorry, Luke. I’m so sorry.”

Thankfully her life sentence in her room had eased somewhat after the fireworks, and she was at least allowed at the table again. Still, she was smart enough to eat slowly and only what was passed her way. She spoke only when spoken to and only as much as absolutely necessary. It seemed that as long as she kept herself to a minimum, the others were perfectly happy to play along.

Baked chicken gone, Sage stood to clear the table. She was an expert at that now as well. Helping. Don’t draw attention, just do, and then disappear as soon as possible. It was astounding how good she had gotten at that.

“So you’re going to the bonfire?” her stepmother asked Jaycee who was stacking dishes in the dishwasher like an out-of-control tornado.

“Yeah.”

“Luke taking you?”

That jerked Sage’s gaze up and sent her heart skittering into her shoes, but she snapped the mask on tightly, got herself back to normal, and brought more dishes.

“Probably.”

“You know, I really have to get over there. Felicia is going to think I’m a horrible neighbor. Did you hear, Hannah cut her hand the other day?”

“No. Was it bad?”

“Five stitches I heard,” Mrs. Lawrence said. “I can’t imagine your baby being hurt all the way at school like that.”

Jaycee laughed. “She’s only half an hour away, Mom.”

“Still. I think I should just bubble wrap you and store you in the closet.”

“There’s a good idea,” Jaycee said, and they both laughed.

Sage set the last of the dishes on the cabinet and got out a dishrag to start drying. That was her job now, and they all seemed to let her do it without fanfare. It was so much easier being invisible.

“What time does the party start?” Mrs. Lawrence asked, putting another serving bowl in the second sink for Sage.

“Just after dark usually. It’s not like anyone sets a real time.”

Her stepmother sighed. “I remember the bonfires.” She shook her head as if lost in thought. “So many good times.”

“I know, Mom. You’ve told me.”

“Well, I just love the old stories, and trust me, someday you will too.”

Sage wished there would be old stories for her, but of course, there never would. Old stories were for other people, people who wanted to remember who they were and how far they had come. She didn’t want to remember any of that, and remembering that she didn’t want to remember was the only thing holding her in one piece.

After the dishes were done, Sage waited until Jaycee left and the others were in the living room watching the game before she slipped out of her room and into the den. She needed no more than the little reading light over the couch. Truth was, she probably wouldn’t get much reading done anyway. Too many thoughts, about him, about them, about tonight and what it meant.

Crazy how bad she wanted to fight for Luke, a guy she would never have looked at twice back home. Crazier still how little chance she really had with him. No, him and Jaycee were the perfect match. High school sweethearts, destined to…

“Knock. Knock.”

Confusion and disbelief swept through her as she looked up, realized who it was, and straightened. More confusion piled on as Sage’s heart drummed to life. Was it possible that all her thoughts had somehow convinced her that he could be standing there? Or could he really, actually be standing there? “Luke?”

Worry. Fear. Hope. They met in the middle of her heart and jammed there like five o’clock traffic on a Friday. “What? What’re you… doing here?”

His soft smile brought up even more panic in the middle of her. “Hope you don’t mind. Your folks said you were in here.”

“I… Uh… Yeah. No. Yeah. I mean, um, I don’t… I don’t… mind.”

He was walking now, coming over to her, and her heart was hammering harder with every step he took. What was he doing here? Why would he come? When he was right in front of her, his gaze slipped to the end of the couch just beyond her feet. “Mind if I join you?”

Oh. My. Lanta! In that white T-shirt and blue plaid shirt, he was the epitome of casual gorgeousness. Get it together, Sage! “Uh. N… no. I don’t mind.” She went to slide her feet off the couch, but he stopped her with a lifted hand.

“Hey, no. Don’t move on my account. I’m fine.”

Well, truer words were never spoken, darlin’. The thought went through her unbidden, and she blinked it back. What was she thinking? What was he doing? Was he really sitting down at the other end of this couch? This was insane.

Then logic and understanding gripped her and shook sense back over the insanity. “Uh, Jaycee’s not…”

But his gaze stopped her as he settled in on the couch. “Oh, I didn’t come for Jaycee.” Soft and vulnerable his eyes held hers. “I came to see you.”

Oh, for the love of Pete!  This was getting worse by the second. Sage had to find a way to explain to her heart that this wasn’t what it was pleading for it to be or it would be game over for her sanity. “My parents…?”

“Yeah.” He hooked his thumb over his shoulder and resettled himself on the couch. “Your dad let me in.”

“My…” Okay, Sage! Breathe, child. Calm down!  Her brain stumbled on another explanation. “Oh. Um, I… Didn’t you get my message? I’m not going to the bonfire.”

“Yeah.” He nodded slowly. “That’s why I’m here.”

Finally this made some sense. She let her head fall on the whisper of horrible understanding that at least told her heart to stop being ridiculous. “Oh, Luke. I’m not…”

He shrugged as he turned to her, laying his arm over the couch back. “I know.”

What did he know, and how could he know it, and why was he looking at her like that? It was making mush of her ability to talk herself out of thinking this could be real.

“So I figured we could just hang out, read a little Man’s Search for Meaning or something.” His mischievous grin came out. “But not the rancher one. I’m not really into the romance stuff.”

All her feelings collapsed into utter disbelief. “You… don’t have to do this for me.”

A second and he turned so he was looking right at her. “Yeah? Well, what if I want to?” He let out a breath, and his gaze fell. Then gently he brushed his fingers on her ankle, which sent tingles all the way through her. Half a bounce and his gaze came back up to hers. “Look, I don’t care if we go to the bonfire or Mars. I don’t even care if we sit right here and talk about baseball all night. I just want to spend some time with you.”

Sage lifted her eyebrows. “I don’t know much about baseball.”

The laugh started and spread to his smile and his eyes. “Well, then it’s about time you learn.”

Gratefulness that she hadn’t just outright thrown him out was all Luke could feel as they sat together, talking about the past couple of days. Her sewing. His fixing the hutches.

“So they each have their own little home?” Sage asked as he tried to explain the concept of calf hutches.

“Yeah. They’re not real complicated. I could probably have done them in my sleep.”

“You must be really good at it… woodworking I mean.”

Tipping his head to the side, Luke shrugged. “It’s something to do I guess.”

However, Sage narrowed her eyes. “But they were saying about the wishing well, how good it was.”

He shrugged. “It’s a few joints and some glue. It’s not a masterpiece or anything.”

Then as he watched, she did something he wasn’t at all prepared for. Slowly she closed the book in her lap, laid it to the side, and shifted herself all the way up and around so that she was suddenly sitting right next to him. Every alert blared to life in his body when she did that. In a half of the next heartbeat, her hand was in his, over it, covering it, on his thigh, and every normal functioning message in his brain and body short-circuited.

“Can I see it?” she asked, her eyes digging into his as if hope wasn’t just some word he’d heard one time.

Luke swallowed. She was so close, so incredibly close. He couldn’t breathe right. “The wishing well?”

“Anything you’ve done. I want to see it.”

A memory of a wooden piece with her name scrawled in it slipped into his mind, and he ducked his head, knowing he would never show that to her that in a million years. She would laugh at him if she ever saw it. “Um, I just play around. None of it’s really very good.”

Her gaze traced over his face, never so much as moving. “Still. Will you show it to me… sometime?”

The pull of her was incredible, and Luke finally gave up the fight and let his eyes go where they wanted to—up to hers, over her, into her, through her and right into the essence of her staring back at him. He couldn’t do it any longer, couldn’t hold himself back from what he had wanted to do for so long now. No words came as he closed his eyes and gave in to how much he wanted her.

Somehow part of him had always thought she would run in horror if this ever happened. Other parts had told him it never would. Instead, to his utter surprise, it was her that came to him, bending toward him until her lips warm and smooth brushed across his, setting off a myriad of fireworks in his very being. The soft shock of it gasped its way through him, jolting him and knocking every thought other than her from his mind. In that flash, all he wanted was more, but at the last second reality grabbed him, and he backed up, blinking that somehow she was here, with him, and she wasn’t running, and she wasn’t telling him to stop, and somehow, unbelievably, she was now looking at him like that.

His gaze searched hers, afraid for what he might find in her eyes, but instead of horror and revulsion, her smile was lit with starry sparkles of its own. Knowing how dangerous this was, Luke backed away from her an inch more, and with a shaking hand and another swallow sent his fingers through his hair. He’d never felt a power surge like this one. It had adrenaline and fire mixed with insanity and desire, and he wasn’t at all sure he could withstand another dose of it. “Sage….”

But she just smiled, the stars sparkling even brighter. “I know.” And then with no pretense, she snuggled down onto his shoulder, wrapping her arms through and around his so where he stopped and she started was impossible to tell. “So tell me about how you learned to do woodworking.”

Luke couldn’t remember. Seriously, with her fingers now twining with his like that, who could remember anything? “Well, um, I guess it started with watching my dad when I was little.”

Sage could have sat right there and listened and asked questions all night. This was far better than texting, far better even than going to sleep on his parents’ couch. They talked about his growing up in a house full of sisters—complete with the story of them dressing him up like a princess and painting his fingernails pink and orange. They talked about him and his dad and how much he liked escaping out to their work shed. And they talked about his mom and her trying to navigate her children’s relationships, loves, crushes, and break-ups.

“So what did she think about Jaycee?” Sage asked, her heart still saying this could never last and she wanted him to be taken care of when it ended.

Instead of answering, Luke looked down at her and narrowed his eyes. “Why does everything always come back to Jaycee?”

She shrugged one shoulder and dipped her chin. “I don’t know. Doesn’t it?”

This breath was hard and he shifted himself and lifted his arm to put it around her. Even when she was settled there, neither of them said anything.

Finally, he turned to her and looked down. “Look Sage, if I wanted to be with Jaycee right now, I would be.”

And her heart fell.

“But I’m not. Am I?”

She shook her head as sadness washed over her. “But when I’m gone.”

He let out a longer breath filled with frustration. “You really think when you’re gone, I’m going to forget about the most amazing girl I’ve ever met?”

It was hard, but she shrugged. “You might.”

“And what if I don’t?”

At that her gaze trailed up to his. She wanted to say something, but it came out a half shrug as tears stung her eyes.

Gently he pulled her to him and held her there. “I guess I’m just going to have to prove to you you’re not the forgettable kind.” Another moment and his embraced relaxed. “Huh?”

Sage backed up but got caught in the web of his gaze and lost her ability to move. He smiled softly, shook his head, and slipped his fingers into the strands of hair at her neck.

“Like I could ever forget…”

“Eh-hmm.” The sound at the door sent Sage careening backward, and only because Luke caught her did she not fall right off of the couch. In the next breath she was sitting away from him, trying desperately to get real snapped over whatever that dream was.

Her stepmother strode into the room and over to the bookshelf. “It’s getting kind of late, don’t you think, Luke?”

Looking over at Sage, he shifted. “Um, yeah. I guess so.”

She retrieved a book, spun and smiled at them with the most fake smile ever, and Sage knew with one look this was a kamikaze mission. “We would hate for you to get into trouble over being over here too late, wouldn’t we, Sage?”

Breath had left. “Yeah. Yes. Of course.” And her voice launched up a pitch. “We were just saying that, weren’t we, Luke? That it was getting late.” However, when she looked over at him, his face had gone hard. Pleading with him to understand flooded her heart. “We were, right?”

“Yeah.”

And with her stepmother standing right there like a smirking guard, they stood from the couch. He looked both wary and sad when his gaze came down to hers. “Guess I’ll see you in the morning.”

She nodded, unable to say anything. A second and he ducked, turned, and walked out.

Nobody and nothing moved for the longest minute of her life, and then like a snake intent on dinner, her stepmother came over to her. “Don’t think I don’t know what you’re up to.” She nodded after the long-since gone figure. “I just hope he can recover his good name in this town after you’re gone. Sad he’s going to let you seeing how you’ve already ruined one decent guy’s good name.”

And with that she brushed past her and walked out.

Chapter 20

Maybe it was because of how well things had gone the night before, maybe it was the hope of things to come. Whatever it was, the next morning when Luke caught sight of her coming into the church, his heart nearly fell right out of him at the sight. Sage. Oh, no…

Determined to make no one look at anyone other than her, Sage entered the lobby, chin up, perfection on display for all to see. Whatever the rumors they had heard about her and Luke would surely be dispelled if they saw them together today. Hurting him was the last thing she wanted to do, but letting this go any longer would surely hurt him more in the end. No. It was time to put a stop to this charade of her being anything other than what she really was.

A tramp.

A high-end, high maintenance, heartless debutante who thought nothing of crushing the dreams of every stupid hick who worshipped at her altar. That’s what they all thought, so that’s what she was going to give them. And then they would know once and for all that it was she who was playing him. They would think him a fool maybe, but they wouldn’t blame him. He was just a pawn in her game, a sucker, a chump. It would be far better for him to crash now than to go on believing they had a chance together. Of that much and so, so much more, her stepmother had convinced her.

Black fitted top that started at one shoulder only, cutouts cascading from that shoulder to the silver studs ringing her chest. Large silver hooped earrings. A black skirt so short and tight Luke could hardly think what others would think without getting angry at her and at himself.

Her hair was up and down at the same time, wisping down but never quite falling, and she had on heels so high, she’d gained four inches. He didn’t miss the appreciative second and third glances she got from several of the males in the room, and that stabbed into his heart with a dull knife and stuck there. What kind of a game was she playing anyway? From across the room, he heard the syrup of her voice though it wasn’t really audible as she greeted one of the little older ladies who apprised her outfit with clear knowing.

That smile, at once so fake, and so maddeningly gorgeous. If she was trying to make him crazy, it was absolutely, positively working. Luke reached up and ran his hand over his head, feeling like the biggest idiot on the planet.

It was then that he noticed Jaycee, arms folded, standing just behind her sister, rolling her eyes and scowling at the spectacle, and one part of him didn’t blame her at all. He closed his eyes and shook his head. This was impossible.

Across everyone’s heads, Sage saw the look of utter disgust cross his face, and when his eyes came open, she couldn’t stop the I’m sorry smile from crossing her face. Then she let out a breath, lifted her chin and put on her best Sage Hollywood smile to follow her family inside.

Anger, pure and simple dragged Luke through the service. It had him by the collar, and it wouldn’t let go. What was she trying to prove and to whom? Him? Was this little show for his benefit, or for the community’s? He wasn’t even sure he wanted to know. Either way, it jerked his heart in ways too painful to put into words. When he picked up the collection, he made sure to not look at her. He couldn’t. It hurt too much.

After the service, he hauled himself out of the bench and went to the other side to hand out bulletins. Seeing her up close and personal like this might make him disengage from reason and propriety and every other good thing in him that she’d stepped on in those heels.

True, that was the point—to make him stay away, to get him to stay away, but one sad part of Sage said this wasn’t what she wanted at all. However, sanity knew better, and she was thankful when her family made the imminently good decision to leave. Playing this part was harder than she remembered. Absorbing the looks, the innuendo—spoken and unspoken. Yes, they all knew what she was, and now, so did he.

Luke couldn’t get her out of his head. All the way home and to his grandmother’s his thoughts went around and around that pole. Her the night before, soft, loving, kind. And her this morning looking like Wicked Witch #1. Although he knew both were in her, why she kept slithering back to the other one made no sense to him.

Entering his grandmother’s kitchen, he did his best not to listen to the gossip about the morning. He couldn’t take hearing it. Even worse was his mother’s soft, pitying look. I told you so, she seemed to say with no words, and words or not, Luke didn’t want to hear it. Not now. Not ever.

In the living room, he collapsed onto the couch next to Hannah, feeling his life crashing down around him.

“Well, look what the cat dragged in,” she said, her voice far happier than any voice had the right to be. However, with one real look at him, the happiness in her faded. “Wow. What happened to you?”

Folding his hands in his lap as he leaned one shoulder back into the couch, he looked over at her, ready to blast the first person who made the mistake of being nice to him. “Don’t ask.”

Concern slipped over her features. “Uh. Oh.” She glanced over at her father and grandfather and then scooted closer to him. “Is this about that girl Mom told me about? Sarah? Samantha?”

“Sage,” he said, the name burning a hole in his throat. He shook his head, letting his gaze burrow further into the anger corroding through his heart.

Hannah lifted her chin and let it down slowly. “Sage. Jaycee’s sister.”

“Yeah.” Luke looked down at his hands, and his head went one way as the pain slashed into him. How could he be so stupid?

“This sounds serious. What happened? She dump you?”

Luke laughed at that. “That would at least make some sense.”

“Okay. I’m confused.”

“Yeah, join the crowd.”

His sister sat, surveying him. “Mind filling me in?”

He considered telling her no, but the truth was nothing was making sense in his head, and Hannah really did have his best interests at heart. Of that he was sure. “It’s just. We were together last night, at her parents’ place, and everything was great. You know? I mean, she’s this amazing, wonderful, awesome girl.”

“Yes, I can see why that’s a problem.”

One angry look stopped her.

“Sorry. Continue.”

The next memory was harder to deal with than he had thought it would be. “Then she showed up at church this morning like…” What were the words? “Like… I don’t know. Like she was this diva divine from Hollywood or something. Everyone was looking at her, and…” He let out a pain-filled breath. “It’s like sometimes she’s this great, awesome person I want to be with more than anything, and sometimes she like this plastic, perfect Barbie doll that’s all high-and-mighty-better-than-everybody-else. I don’t get it. I don’t get why she would do that.”

“And this outfit? This isn’t how she normally dresses?”

“Yes. No. Well, no… not exactly.”

“Not exactly? I’m not following. Either it is or it isn’t.”

“That’s just it.” And then Luke threw all propriety to the wind and laid it all out for his sister because it was starting to shred his sanity. “It’s like she’s two different people. The dresses. The heels. The hair. That’s one Sage, the one that everybody sees and everybody hates or envies or whatever.” He shook his head. “But then, when she’s with me, when we’re together…”

“No plastic?”

Surprise lit through him. “Yeah.” He squinted trying to see what he was missing. “I don’t get that. Why would she keep morphing into this crazy, fake person I don’t even recognize?”

Hannah’s face slipped into a soft smile. “She’s scared.”

“Scared? Of me?”

She shook her head, and her gaze softened even more. “You’re safe. That’s why she can be who she is around you. But everyone else, they’re not safe.” She let out a breath. “Okay, little brother, I’m going to tell you a secret about us girls, but if you ever tell anybody I told you, I’ll shoot you in your sleep.”

Luke lifted his eyebrows.

A moment and Hannah’s gaze fell to between them, and he knew, all kidding aside, they were getting into very deep water. She looked up and let out a breath. “Girls get broken. When people hurt them, when people judge them or set them up to tear them down, they break. Sometimes those breaks are easy to hold together and make everyone else think you’re okay. Sometimes, the only way to hold the broken pieces together is to become someone else.”

He absorbed what she was telling him. “Sage is broken.”

Hannah nodded although he was sure even she didn’t know how right she was. “Girls go into protect-myself mode when they feel like they’re getting close to getting hurt. Maybe someone hit them, and they jerk away when you touch them. Or you start to get close, and they realize that you could hurt them like the last person did, so they pull away.

“Or they put on make-up and a killer dress and heels because that will convince everyone that everything is wonderful and they aren’t completely falling apart inside.”

Suddenly, Luke could kick himself for falling into the trap of judging her and pulling back just when she needed him the most. “Can someone ever be put back together?”

His sister shrugged. “It’s not easy. Not when someone’s been hurt that much.”

“But it’s possible?”

She smiled ruefully and then wistfully. “For your sake, I really hope so.”

It took Luke about 30 second to decide that he had crossed a line and couldn’t go back. He stood from the couch, and Hannah’s gaze followed him up. “Where’re you going?”

He turned and lowered his eyes while lifting his eyebrows.

“Oh.” She nodded. “Well, good luck.”

“Yeah.” Heading out through the kitchen, he let his strides fill with the purpose flowing in him. “I’m headed out.”

“Out?” his mother asked in surprise. “We haven’t even eaten yet.”

“Yeah, well.” He kissed her. “I’m going to see Sage.”

Her eyes widened.

“Who’s Sage?” his grandmother asked, and Luke settled the argument with one solid look at his mother.

“See ya.”

Sage hardly had the heart to breathe much less to do anything meaningful. Her mother’s text about being in Rome did nothing to lift her spirits. Yes, once again, when her life was coming apart no one else even seemed to notice or to care. The tears came although they were stupid. They would do no one any good, least of all her, and she knew it.

Poor, poor pitiful Sage. Let’s throw a pity party for Sage. The words from so long ago drove into the softest places in her. They hated her. All of them. And she didn’t blame them. She hated herself. What did she have to be pitiful about? Fabulous clothes. Incredible shoes. More money than she could ever spend. What did she have to be unhappy about?

The memory of the look he gave her at church cut deeper, and she shook her head to get herself to stop caring. If she could just stop caring…

“Oh, hey,” Luke said when he came face-to-face with Emily Lawrence who opened the back door. He ran his hand over his head.

“Luke? Are you here to see Jaycee?”

Oh, boy. This is going to be rough. “Uh, no. Actually. I was wondering if Sage and I could…”

Her face looked like storm clouds had just descended. “Sage?”

Courage had never taken so much. “Yes. Is she here?”

The words seemed almost blows to her, and she set her jaw. “Do your parents know you’re here?”

“Yes, actually they do.”

She glowered. “And they approve?”

Well, approving might be pushing it. “Can I see Sage?”

“Who is it?” Mr. Lawrence appeared behind his wife, and he took one look and his smile held amazement. “Luke. Let me guess.”

The knock sounded on her bedroom door, and Sage didn’t have the energy to get up and answer it. “Um, who is it?” she asked, sitting up and swiping at her eyes. Man, bubbly was a hard reach.

But whoever it was just knocked again. Anger and annoyance went through her followed immediately by exhaustion. She stood from the bed and tramped over to the door. “I’m here,” she said without opening the thing. “What do you need?”

On the other side, Luke put one hand on his beltline and the other on the doorframe. “Sage, it’s me. Open up.”

Sage, it’s me, open up? Her eyes widened as horror struck right through the middle of her. “Luke?”

“Yeah. Open up.”

Her gaze sliced around the room—the rumpled covers, the clothes piled on the luggage, and her. Oh, her. She ran to the mirror and freaked out completely. “Oh, my…”

“Look, I need to talk to you. Can you let me in?”

Had he completely lost his mind? What in the world was he doing here?

“I, uh… I’m… coming!” It came out with her even realizing it, the sweet voice. The mirror and hairbrush weren’t helping anything. She dropped the brush as her hands forgot how to work right.

“Sage?”

“Yeah?”

“Just open up.”

Finally she abandoned the hopeless attempt to fix herself and went to the door. Opening it, she buried her gaze on the carpet at her bare feet. “Uh, I didn’t… you didn’t say you were coming over.”

Luke took one look at her, and he knew she had been crying. How many times had she been in this room crying while the whole world went on as if it didn’t care one way or the other? Anger split into his heart as his hand slid from the doorframe.

“I’m sorry,” he said, knowing that was going to take far more explanation but needing to start somewhere.

“Sorry?” She looked up at him with worry, and he saw then clearer than he ever had. “What? Why?”

He closed his eyes and summoned his courage. Then he opened his eyes and tipped his head. “You know, I think it’s a good day to go see the beach, don’t you?”

“The… beach?” Sage’s eyes went wide as she began to seriously worry about the stability of his mind. “Now?”

“Yeah. I already asked your dad.”

“Dad?”

“He said I had to ask you. So I’m asking. Sage, do you want to go to the beach with me?”

She swayed there, looking at him uncomprehendingly.

“Okay,” he finally said. “Then let’s try it this way. Sage, I’m going to the beach, and I would like for you to come with me.”

Sage’s mouth started to say something, just what she wasn’t at all sure.

“The answer I’m looking for here is ‘Yes,’” he said, narrowing his eyes at her. “Say it with me. Yyyyyes.”

The laugh was soft, almost not there, and the tears began pooling in her eyes. “Why?”

“Come with me and find out.”

And so, Sage found herself in his car regardless of her terror over what this all meant. As they drove, she lectured herself in her mind to not let herself fall into this dream. This was too good to be true. It would be too easy to hope. It was too dangerous to believe it might be real. It couldn’t be, and if it was, it wouldn’t last. As the car sped down the coast, she let her gaze go out to the sea beyond. The ocean so familiar and yet so different. This one was colder. She could almost feel the difference even from here. Her spirit felt it, whispered to her that this was different than the one she knew, different and not at all safe.

Questions and qualms started, snaking through the depths of her, and she ran her hand up and down her arm that was covered in the loose cream of her soft blouse, the upper bodice of which scooped farther than she should have thought proper. Part of her wanted to pull the material up, but she sensed him if not watching then at least monitoring her movement, and it made her lightheaded and skittish to be scrutinized so closely.

“It’s only a couple more miles,” he said, propping his wrist onto the steering wheel. “A friend of mine owns the place. We used to come down here during the summers sometimes.”

“Oh.” Sage lifted her chin, but emotions she couldn’t name or describe cris-crossed through her. Some of it was worry, some confusion, some outright panic. What did he want, and why wasn’t he telling her?

Luke glanced over at her and smiled. “I think you’re going to love it.”

Curled on her side of the car, she was in too much turmoil to trust any feeling. Especially love.

The glance he took sent true worry through Luke. Part of him felt like she was thinking he was kidnapping her, part of him thought she was about to jump out if he gave her the chance. It was a date, impromptu, yes, but a date just the same. Why did she look like he might be an ax murderer? Able to take that look no longer, he laid his hand across the console, palm up, in offering to her only.

Her gaze slipped over to it and then up to him, and he hated all the mistrust swirling in her eyes. He smiled softly, hoping she would accept his offer but not at all sure she would. Finally, a slow inch at a time, her hand came across from her side until just her little finger brushed his. He couldn’t stop the smile from increasing as he spun his hand and took her fingers into the protectiveness of his grasp, and with a nod, he retrained his gaze out the window, knowing this was going to be the biggest challenge of his life, but knowing also it was so going to be worth it.

At the little beach house, they parked and Luke got out to come around and help her. After the intimacy of the confines of the car, Sage suddenly felt very exposed. The soft roar of the ocean waves engulfed them, and the world seemed to stretch both ways from their vantage point and all the way off the curve of the earth beyond. Standing there next to her, Luke waited for her to tire of the view, and when she looked up at him, her heart panged hard and painfully.

He was so amazing, so wonderful. It would be so easy to let herself believe this wasn’t just a schoolgirl’s dream.

“You wanna walk?” he asked, his eyes caressing hers.

“Oh. Uh, yeah. Okay.” Dipping her gaze to her feet, she put her hand up to her elbow and rubbed it there up and down her forearm, wishing she could breathe and think and figure out where this was going and why. Of course, she remembered her own behavior at church, and she knew he did too. Would he ask her about it? Yell at her about it? What?

Never really touching, they picked their way down the small dunes to the rocky beach beyond and just walked a ways without saying anything. He didn’t look at her really, more past her, out to the wind and the white-capped waves beyond. Then after a while his gaze returned to the sand in front of them, and she felt his disappointment in her and his reluctance at being out here with her. Why hadn’t he just left well enough alone? Why did he bring her all the way out here? To make her explain what she had done, what she couldn’t put into words? To tell her how hurt and confused he was? She could tell that. It screamed off of him, and she wanted to make it better, but the last thing she wanted was to lead him on, to make him think they had any chance at a future together. Because they so didn’t. They couldn’t. The world around them had made that perfectly clear.

The breeze spiraled a tendril of her hair over her face, and she brushed it back and sighed. If she could somehow get herself to be Sage Hollywood, she’d already have him on the sand under her spell. She knew how to do that. She’d done it before with other guys. But this felt nothing like that. Nothing.

Instead, he just kept walking, not talking, not yelling. Just walking. And that was about to send her sanity right over the edge.

Finally, she could take it no longer. She glanced up at him though she was still curled in her protective shell. “Look, I’m really sorry.”

Strangely, he looked surprised by that. “’Bout what?”

What else could she say? “Me? About how I am.”

His gaze came over to hers, and he squinted at her. “How are you?”

“Come on, Luke.” She sighed, praying the tears wouldn’t come up. “We’ve been through this.”

“That’s what I can’t figure out, you know?” He glanced over at her but kept walking just the same.

Hating how much hurt was in his voice, she asked, “What?”

Step and then another, and his gaze traveled past hers, out to the lapping of the waves. “Well.” He put his hands up on his beltline and shook his head. “I know the whole thing about your dad and everything. I get that. And I get how your folks and Jaycee and everybody treats you. What I can’t figure out is if this is the real Sage or if that one is.”

His words sliced through her heart, and she let her own gaze jump to the waves.

Still walking, he put his hands up and under his armpits. “Because this Sage is someone I want to be with more than I can even let myself think, but then…”

She felt his disappointment as it knifed into her heart. “I know.”

With that, he stopped, and in one step he was face-to-face with her. “If you know, then why do you do that?”

Sage couldn’t get her gaze up to his. She couldn’t see what he really thought of her. It would hurt too much. “I don’t… I don’t know how to be… this.” Finally, she managed to look at him. In frustration and anger, she spread her arms out. “Look at me, Luke. Look. This isn’t what anybody wants. This, me. I don’t want to be this me.”

He looked right at her. “Why not?”

A second and she couldn’t do it anymore. She stepped past him and tromped down the sand, not really caring about being rude or making him mad.

“Sage?” Never had he been so frustrated with anyone. Luke turned and headed after her, and when he caught up with her, he knew she was crying, which was not what he’d wanted to do, but it happened just the same. “Why don’t you want to be this Sage? Why? What is so wrong with her?”

“Because she’s not good enough, okay? Because all she does is embarrass everyone.”

With that, Luke reached out and snagged her movement, stopping them both in one step. “What do you mean, she’s not good enough? She’s amazing.”

Pleading raked through her eyes that were filled with tears. “You don’t get it. You just don’t get it.”

“You’re right I don’t. So explain it to me.”

A second and she shook her head and let her gaze drop between them. Another and he gently put his finger under her chin and lifted it until her gaze, pain-filled and aching met his.

Sage is broken. It was all his heart could think as he looked at her then, and standing there, he could see it more clearly than he ever had before. “Sage, it’s okay. Just tell me. Explain it to me. I want to know.”

Her tears came for real, slipping over her lashes and streaming onto her face. The cool breeze brushed across them, making her shiver. She shook with the emotions and the cold and the memories she wanted no part of remembering. His stability was gentle as he came to her and gathered her into him.

“Come here.” And then his arms were around her, holding her as she let the pieces of her heart fall from her grasp. They left her hands ripped and bleeding as she had always known they would if she ever let them go. The pain was unbelievable, and it came up in vats of harshness and tears.

However, the longer he held her, the more her tears began soaking into his shirt, the plaid one that was kind of teal. She liked that one, it brought out the green of his eyes. And now, he was holding her next to it. It was softer than she had thought it would be, like a warm blanket on a cold, dark night, and then she realized she was gripping the back of his shirt tail until it would surely be hopelessly wrinkled for all eternity. Slowly with all her willpower, she released her grip and let it go, smoothed it out, and shook her head, still sniffing into the security of his embrace. It felt better than any place had a right to, but she was taking advantage of it, of him, and she knew it.

Never taking his arms from her, Luke backed up just slightly and looked down at her, the questions trailing through his eyes. Sage looked up at him and smiled softly, the effort of which snapped off a few more pieces of her shredded heart.

“So are you going to tell me?” he asked, his eyes burrowing deeper and deeper into her.

A breath and with both hands, she raked her hair over her ears, fighting back another onslaught of tears she hadn’t known were right there ready to pounce. It was incredible how many of them there were, and how unrelenting they were when she stupidly let them get started. Swiping at them with both hands, she sniffed. “I’m not sure how. I just… I… This is how I am.”

“This?” he asked, his voice so gentle it pulled her gaze up to his.

More tears even as she beat them back. “It’s not who I’m supposed to be.”

Instead of asking, he just nodded.

“It’s not. This is pitiful and disappointing.” She sniffed again and swiped at her eyes. “Sage the drama-queen. Get over yourself already. The world doesn’t revolve around you. Not everyone can just drop stuff and come running because you think they should.” The words she had heard her whole life came tumbling out of her heart and her mouth. “And they were right.” She looked up at him as if trying to convince him. “They were. I’m not the center of the universe, and being a big baby about stuff all the time is just not attractive.”

With everything in him, Luke wanted to contradict her, to explain how she was wrong because these pieces hurt him to see, but she was showing him them now, like the artwork his mother put on her fridge when he was a first-grader because it was the best he could do. She’s broken, Luke. Sage is broken.

“Letting them see… this.” She backed up, put her arms out, and sniffed. Then she laughed. “They’d all be horrified.”

“Who’s they?”

With a sniff, she laughed again. “Everybody.”

He nodded. “Your mom?”

The emotions left her face like a board being swiped clean. “Yeah.”

“And your friends?”

“Oh, man.” This laugh sounded like it started in the pit of hell as she put her hand up to her nose. “They would totally disown me.”

Luke was nodding now, his heart putting the pieces together as she handed them to him. “This Sage isn’t good enough for them.”

“No,” she breathed the word as a fresh batch of tears wrenched across her features, but she beat them back, and he wondered how many times she had done that in her lifetime. Beat them back, denied them, pushed them down, refused to give in to them. “This Sage is a pathetic, weak, disaster waiting to happen.”

Then his mind spiraled back to other things she had said. “She gets lost a lot,” he said gently as understanding began to overtake the confusion.

A moment and she nodded as this set of tears became too much for her to hold back.

“And she makes a mess of things?”

The words were crumpling her soft face, and Luke’s heart broke for her—for all the hurt she had carried for so long. A breath and he gathered her back into his arms. “Oh, baby.” His hands went up and over her hair, stroking her head and her back. “Darlin’. Darlin’. Darlin.” He let out a breath, feeling her sobs next to him as he kissed her hair.

If he would have been close enough, he would have smashed the people who had done this to her. How could anyone be so cruel?

Slowly then, as the emotions began to let go of her, Sage began to feel something else, something wholly unexpected. It was something about how he was holding her, how his hand was rubbing softly across her back, how in this moment he had nothing better in the world to do than to give her himself. One small breath at a time, she let herself simply get lost in that feeling, wondering if it could be for real. Each step into it that she took felt fraught with danger, and some part of her was screaming that this wasn’t safe. That he wasn’t safe, that he would be just like all the rest of them, that he would use her and then just disappear.

But she was so tired, so tired of being alone, so tired of trying so hard to please everyone and never even getting close. So tired of hearing their disapproval and condemnations. So, so tired of the masks and the games. And now here he was, holding her when she was falling apart. “I’m sorry,” she whispered. “I’m so sorry.”

However, Luke now knew the lie in that. Not her lie. The lie. He slipped backward and let his gaze lock on hers. “You have nothing to be sorry for, darlin’. Nothing at all.” Then he put his arms around her again and pressed her even closer to him, wanting only to absorb all of her pain into himself. “You are amazing, and you always have been. I knew it the first time I saw you, but now…”

A long breath and once again he backed away from her to be able to look at her. Her gaze that came up to his carried in it worry and confusion and hope and defeat all at the same time. “Thank you,” she whispered, her eyes searching his.

But he shook his head and smiled gently. “No, thank you.”

The understanding of how he was looking at her clutched Sage’s senses about the same second she realized that he was moving toward her. Even as his eyes asked hers the question, she could only ask them back. Was this real? Was he really holding her like he loved her, like he wanted her—not for the moment but for forever?

And then his eyes fell closed and he leaned toward her, so close he was only a breath away. In that moment her heart released its hold on life as her own eyes fell closed, her entire being surrendering to the stability of his strength. Yet she didn’t fall, didn’t plummet and shatter, because he was holding her, and in his arms, she was perfectly and utterly safe.

That sensation swept over her just as his soft, gentle, warm lips brushed across hers scattering sanity with it. As the sea breeze swept over them, her remaining defenses melted into his presence. She let out the breath she’d been holding her whole life as her balance swayed, dangling beneath her. Her senses shifted, suddenly completely untrustworthy. Without her realizing it, her arms came up to his back, pulling him to her lest he try to back away. Nothing in her ever wanted him to leave her again. Ever.

The first kiss melted into a second, and Sage had the distinct impression that she was losing herself in him, and that she wanted nothing more than to do just that. Gasps grabbed her and pulled her down into them as she relinquished control and gave it to him, willingly, pleadingly. She didn’t care about anything anymore, what someone else might think of him, of her. If it made sense or not. His station, her life. None of that mattered anymore. None of it even existed. It all just dropped away and disappeared into the hunger of his kisses. In fact, if this was the last moment she ever lived, she would have never had need to ask for another.

Then as he began to fight to regain reality for both of them, she felt his thumb sliding up and down her spine, slowly, gently, and all she wanted was more of him as he buried his face into her shoulder.

“Luke…”

He was swaying now too, back and forth on the whims of the breeze, and he clutched her like a dying man clinging to a life preserver, hugging her to him, not letting go. “I know, darlin’. I know.”

Even as he fought to get himself under control, Luke held her there in the fullness of his embrace, unwilling to let her go even if he might drown in the feel of her. Never before had he been this overwhelmed, this engulfed with desire such that he could hardly be responsible for his own actions. Inside him, his heart was racing and his breathing was barely gasps. He was completely out-of-control, and he knew it.

Yes, he had wanted to kiss her, but this was something he hadn’t anticipated—this full-on mega-rush of insanity when his being connected with hers. What was that anyway? It was so overpowering, he was almost scared to acknowledge it lest it take hold of him again.

Finally, with every bit of willpower he had left, he forced his arms to stop clenching her, gripping her, crushing her to him. It was not easy to get his muscles to relax. They did so only with coercion. He exhaled in a whoosh that sent him swaying again, and he shook his head in disbelief. “Holy smokes, girl. What was that?”

She looked up at him, innocence and playfulness meeting in a dangerous mix in her eyes. “That? That was your fault.”

Because dizzying joy was splashing through him, Luke pulled her back to him and laughed. He blinked, forcing his eyes to once again see the seascape beyond. “Goodness gracious. You are dangerous. You know that?”

Her laugh was soft like a breath, and she reached up and danced her finger over his chest which did not help his skittering attempts at restraint. “Hey, I didn’t start this.”

He arched his back so he could look down at her. “Okay. If I try to defend myself from that comment, I’m afraid what might come out of my mouth.” This time, he laughed too, the rush giving way to amazing peacefulness as he held her. “Whoa. I’m telling you, darlin’ I’ve gotta be the luckiest guy that ever lived.”

As Sage let herself simply be held by him, she couldn’t think of another moment that had ever been so right or so real. For once, it was wonderful just to be accepted and loved, no games, no masks as she stood there with him by the sea, wondering if anywhere else would ever feel like this again.

Chapter 21

Hand-in-hand they walked to her parents’ back door, and Sage felt how vulnerable and exposed she had suddenly become. Although her hand was in his, her other one came up and raked across her forearm, holding there as if preparing to face the world falling apart on her own again. She slowed her steps, wanting just one more minute with him and then another and then another. How she would ever be okay when he walked away, she had no clue.

“So, are you working on calf hutches tomorrow?” she asked, wondering who this was walking around in her body, asking this kind of thing. Calf hutches? Really?

He reached up and put his other hand to the back of his head. “Yeah, I’ve only got about six more. Shouldn’t take me too long.”

She nodded, hating how close that door was getting with every step they took while simultaneously loving how his hand felt in hers. She never wanted to let it go. “Well, when you take a break, or if you get bored…” At the step, she stopped and he was right there when she turned to him.

With no pretense, he took her in his arms and gazed down at her. “If I get bored… what?”

Holy smokes was right. How was a girl supposed to keep her heart from falling completely and madly in love with him? She shrugged as she put her arms up over his shoulders. “If you get bored…” Closing her eyes, she arched her face up to his, hoping he wouldn’t think her impetuous or desperate.

She felt his gaze rake across her upturned face and then gently his lips came down onto hers. It wasn’t the passionate kiss from the beach. This one was softer, almost heartbreakingly tender as if he was afraid to hurt her.

When it ended, he wrapped her into his gentle embrace and held her there. “I love you.”

All the air scattered from her body, and suddenly her hand was clutching the teal plaid of his sleeve. Emotions crashed through feelings until she had no idea what any of them were. Closing her eyes, she burrowed into his embrace tighter, only wanting him to absorb all of her. “I love you too.”

“Did you have a good time?”

Sage had hardly had time for her eyes to adjust to the light or her heart to adjust to his departure when she made it into the kitchen. “Uh, yeah. It was fun.”

Arms twined, face set in a scowl, Emily stared her down from five steps away. She shook her head slowly and then dipped her gaze in disgust.

Some part of her wanted to be angry and ask what she had done that was so incredibly wrong, but that part was buried under the mountain of hurt that crashed down over her. It was a battle she would never win, so why even fight it? “I guess I’ll just…”

“So you’re really going to do this?” her stepmother asked. “You’re really going to set him up like this.”

“I’m not setting him up.”

“Give me a break, Sage. I’ve seen how he looks at you, and I have seen how you treat him.”

Okay, so that much was kind of true, but she didn’t want it to be. And after today…

“I don’t know what it is about you, why you think other people’s feelings don’t matter so long as you get what you want.”

“What I want?” Anger tilted off center. “What I want is to be able to like a guy, a really, really nice guy without everyone and their dog thinking that I’m playing him.”

“You’re not?”

“No.” The word was laced with pleadingly. “I’m not. I love him.”

The second the words came out of her mouth, Sage regretted them and fought to pull them back. Horror slashed through her just as her gaze lit on her father who had entered from the other doorway.

“You what?” Emily asked, abject revulsion dripping from the word.

“I…” Sage looked from her stepmother to her father and back again, knowing she couldn’t say it again.

“Love? You wouldn’t know the first thing about loving someone, you…”

“Emily!” The name was so harsh that it yanked both of their attentions over to her father.

Her stepmother recoiled away from her for a second as her gaze snapped over to her husband. Then it bounced back and forth once before she shook her head, turned, and strode past him into the darkness beyond.

Sage felt like she’d just gone ten rounds with Satan, and she let out a long, hard breath that threatened to send her spiraling back down into the depths of why even try. A moment and she knew she had to apologize to him, for everything. She dragged her gaze up to his and found only hurt and pain staring back at her. “I’m sorry, Dad. I never meant…”

As he looked at her, her father’s eyes changed just slightly. “I know.” He shook his head, barely moving it. “I’m sorry too.”

More than anything, Sage wanted him to hug her, to hold her, to take away all the bad stuff, but she knew he couldn’t do that. Doing that would be betraying those he really loved, and she could never ask that of him. “I’m going to bed.”

He nodded. “Okay.”

When he got home, Luke went to his room and texted her. He couldn’t believe all that had happened, that she had kissed him and let him kiss her, that he had held her and told her he loved her. He never in his life had felt like this—like he was flying and floating and falling all at the same time. Loving this feeling, he sent another text and went to get something to eat. Suddenly, he was starving.

Sitting on her rumpled bed in the dark with the door closed, Sage looked down at her phone lying there on the desk, his message staring up at her. Who was she trying to kid? Yes, she loved being with him, being in his arms, on the beach, feeling like he really loved her and wanted to be with her. But that wasn’t life. That was a fantasy. Even if he didn’t know that, she did. And every time she forgot, someone was always right there to remind her.

Not knowing what to say to him because her heart was in such a jumbled up mess, she buried herself in the covers and wished that he would never have come close enough to get burned by the horror that always seemed to catch up with her no matter what she did.

The next morning, Luke texted her twice before he left for Randy’s and once more when he got there. She was probably tired when they got home, and this morning, she was probably sewing or reading. He couldn’t wait to see her again, to hold her, and tell her how much he’d missed her. Another text at noon and one more at two when he finished up. It was only when he realized she still hadn’t sent him a message back that worry started its slow, steady creep over his heart.

She hadn’t texted back. He didn’t like that feeling at all. It said very bad things to his consciousness. So as he headed home, he thought that maybe stopping in just to check on things might be a good idea.

“Sage, do you think you can stop moping around for like two minutes and help us carry these groceries in?” Emily could make her feel like a slug without even trying.

“Uh, sure.” Sage unglued herself from the den couch where she had been all day, trying to read but getting nowhere. She had read the same page five times and still she had no clue what it said.

“I cannot believe how expensive things are getting these days,” her stepmother said to Jaycee in the kitchen as they unloaded the bags. “This used to be fifty cents. I remember when it was.”

Fighting not to listen to them or notice how much they were in their own little mommy-daughter world, Sage went out the back step to the van. At the back hatch, Ryder was bent over trying to reach more bags. “Here, let me help.” Sage went over to him and reached in, retrieving two bags and giving them to him before going for more.

When he was standing there, bags in hand, he looked up at her but did not move.

“What’s wrong?” she asked, tipping her head in confusion. “You need more?”

However, he just looked at her, his face falling into sadness. “I’m really going to miss you.”

Sage’s hands kept moving, kept pulling up bags. “Miss me?”

“When you leave.” He stepped over to her and gave her a hug, banging the bags against her legs.

“Oh. Well…”

“And I don’t care what they say, I really like you.” With that, he let her go and ran into the house.

Nothing in her liked any part of that. Yes, she was leaving. In a month.

Unless…

Trying not to think those thoughts though they attacked her just the same, she gathered up several bags, hiked them up, and headed into the house. She wanted to ask, needed to ask, needed to know. But Emily and Jaycee were discussing chicken and rice recipes as if Sage didn’t even exist. She set the bags on the counter, her heart spilling over with the questions. Ducking, she headed back out to the van. The sun beat down on the earth and on her. After having been in the air conditioning all day, she felt it all the more.

She was bent over, struggling to get the last of the groceries out when she heard the crunch of the tires behind her. Half-turning, she straightened as she squinted into the harsh, blinding sun. Another second and she recognized the car. Her heart fell. How many times would she have to disappoint him before he simply gave up? Reaching up she scratched the top of her head, knowing she couldn’t lie but knowing he would never accept the truth.

“Hey, there, darlin’,” Luke said, getting out of the car and shutting his door. He was in a gray T-shirt, stained with the dirt and hard work of his day. It and he looked amazing. However, she couldn’t, wouldn’t let herself dwell on that or on him. Nor would she think about why he was here or what it all meant. All she could think was how to get him back in that car and out of here before her sister and stepmom saw.

“Oh, hey.” Purposely she kept the bags in her hands between them.

He came right up to her, a smile playing on his lips. “Hey.” A second and he leaned in and pecked her cheek. Then he looked down at the bags. “You need some help with those?”

“No. I’ve got them.” Sage swung them away in case he tried to take them. “Um, you didn’t say you were coming over.”

He lifted his eyebrows and put his hands on the back of his beltline. “You didn’t answer my texts.”

Why hadn’t she? Sage knew now that was a crucial mistake. “I’ve been…” Her gaze slipped up to the house, to the kitchen window, and then fell to between their feet “busy.”

That narrowed his eyes. “Too busy to say hey?”

Her head started to feel like a vice grip was bearing down on it. She glanced at the kitchen window again and hated her life with everything in her.

At that look, his face changed, and he seemed to suddenly understand. Without any notice, he reached for the bags. “Here, let me get those.”

“Luke, no, you don’t have to.”

But he was too fast for her, and he had them before she even got the protest all the way out. “Come on. Let’s go get these put away.”

He knew the game now, not the one she was playing but the one they were playing on her. Isolate and destroy, and they were good at it. At the door even as she continued to protest quietly behind him, he swung it open and went on in ahead of her. In some situations it might not be the gentlemanly thing to do, in this one, he wouldn’t have done it any different had someone paid him.

“Afternoon, everyone,” he said to the two she-wolves standing there. They had clearly already seen him, and he had no intention of letting them anywhere near Sage. “Hope y’all don’t mind my stopping by like this.”

“What?” Mrs. Lawrence said. “Oh, no. Of course not. But you don’t have to carry the groceries in. I’m sure Sage could have gotten them.”

“I was…” she started, but Luke cut her off when he swung the bags to the counter with a thwack, causing her to jump. He felt it, and he knew if he gave her half a chance she would be singing the sweet songs of fake wonderment just like she always did.

“It’s really no problem.” He smiled at them as he stepped back to her and put his arm around her shoulders, a move which evaporated all the air from the entire room. “I’ll take any excuse to come and visit.”

“Um, visit?” her stepmother asked as Jaycee shot daggers at the two of them from the corner of the sink. “You’re… you’re staying?”

“I thought I might for a little bit. Catch up. See what I’ve missed.”

Sage was somewhere between a heart attack and a laughing hysterically. He was sure smooth when he wanted to be. She wasn’t sure if the other two were buying this, but she saw right through his act. For some reason it made her love him even more.

“Why don’t we put these groceries away?” Sage asked him. “We don’t mind, do we?” And she turned and put her hand on his chest. Funny how right that felt.

“Oh, well…” Emily said, her eyes saying things her mouth never would.

“I’ll help,” Jaycee said, jumping in and striding for a bag.

“I can do it.” Sage reached for another one, but Luke stopped her before the fight even got started.

“I think there’s enough groceries here for everybody to help,” he said, letting his drawl come all the way to the surface. “Here you go, Jaycee. A bag for you.” Then he turned to Sage. “And one for me and Sage. See, that wasn’t so hard, was it?”

Jaycee let out a frustrated growl and glared at them before heading for the refrigerator, nearly ripping the door off the hinges when she opened the thing. He tipped his head and smirked so that only Sage could see him, and they went to work putting the rest of the groceries away.

It didn’t take nearly as long as Luke had wanted it to, and in no time, they were back out on the back step with no excuse to prolong the visit. He stuck his hands in his back pockets, feeling the eyes watching them even if he couldn’t see them. “You okay?” he asked, now truly worried for her well-being.

Sage shrugged as if to say she was now, but in five minutes he would be gone, and at that point odds were she wouldn’t be.

“They still busting your chops?”

She shrugged again and shook her head. “They just… they want me gone. It is what it is.”

He couldn’t take the distance any longer. Collecting her into his arms, Luke exhaled as his mind worked through this vexing problem. Every time he left her alone, they attacked, but he couldn’t stay with her 24/7. Then his mind traced over why he had really come.

When he backed up, he leveled his gaze at her. “Is that why you didn’t text?”

Her gaze dropped between them, and she wound her arms in front of her. “I just hate… thinking about what this is doing to you.”

“To me?” He reached over and brushed the hair from her shoulder. “Darlin’, I’m a whole lot more worried about you than I am about me.”

She shook her head. “They always say stuff about how I’m using you and what I’m doing to your reputation in town.”

At that, he laughed. “My reputation? What? Being the biggest loser on the block?”

Angrily, she swatted at his shoulder.

“What?” he asked in surprise. “I am.” He lifted his hand and his gaze to the house beyond. “You go ask Jaycee. She thought I was wasting my potential.”

“You’re not a loser.”

He lowered his gaze at her. “And neither are you.”

Slowly she came back into his arms, melting there.

“Now, you listen to me,” he said as he held her, “not texting me over what they’re telling you is not an option. Got it? Don’t let them talk you out of us. Okay? Don’t. Nothing they can say will ever make me run the other direction.”

Sadness cloaked her eyes when she looked at him. “I just hate…”

“And I hate what they’re doing to you. So we’re even on the hate thing.” His eyes grew even more serious. “Now I don’t care—good, bad, ugly, whatever. You let me know how things are going, or I’m just going to have to keep showing up over here for no reason.”

That brought a mischievous smile to her face. “And that’s a bad thing?”

Luke grinned at that. “Good point.” Then he took a long breath and simply held her there a long moment. “We’ll get through this. I promise you.”

It was a promise he was determined to keep.

“So Dad’s finally going to talk to them about her,” Jaycee was saying when Sage slipped back into the house. “He’s going to tell them she can’t stay anymore, right?”

“He’s going to try. We talked about it again last night. She just isn’t always reasonable. Half the time we think we’re all on the same page and then zap. Who ever knows with her? She’s just like her daughter.”

“But Dad’s serious this time? He’s going to talk to her about it?”

“Yeah, I think this time, one way or the other, she’s out of here.”

“Good. It’s about time. I hate watching what she’s doing to Luke.”

Their conversation faded off into the living room, and Sage forced herself to breathe. She was leaving. They would make sure of it. She wound a strand of hair over her ear, fighting not to cry or freak out. If they knew she’d heard…

But they didn’t.

Softly, slowly, she looked around the corner. The coast was clear, and she hurried into her room. The first thing she saw when she closed the door was the cell phone. Her head spun. He had told her to call. Then again, he had just left. How could panic have set in that quickly?

Trying not to think about it, she picked the thing up, sat on her bed, and wound her hair over her ear again as she fought the tears from falling in her heart. Did he really want her to send an S.O.S. every time they said something like that? Could she really go to him with this stuff?

She closed her eyes and forced the air from her lungs before she started typing on the little keypad with her thumbs.

They’re sending me home.

Luke had just pulled into his place when the cell phone in his pocket buzzed. He parked, dug it out, and swiped it on. A smile played on his lips when he saw it was from her, but it disappeared like dew in the sun when he read the message.

Home? He typed out like his thumbs were on fire. Now?

She hated hurting him like this, hated knowing what her life was doing to him.

Yeah. Em and Jaycee were talking about it. Dad’s calling Mom tonight. Ryder said something earlier about it too. Apparently they all know…

He put his hand on his chin and rubbed it there hard, trying to think, to sort out what they should do and how. A moment and he put his thumbs on the keys, not really wanting to hear this answer.

Do you want to go home?

The message sat there, staring at her, waiting for an answer. But what was the answer? Yes, she wanted out of here, but she would die if she had to leave him now. She raised her thumbs and then lowered them again. What was the answer to that question?

Waiting was about to kill him, so Luke tried again.

Sage, do you want to go back to California?

It seemed like such a simple question. A week ago, she knew what her answer would be. Why had that suddenly become so incredibly complicated?

Pushing her heart ahead of her, she typed out the message very, very slowly.

I don’t know.

That was like a whack to his chest, but Luke absorbed it, knowing she wasn’t trying to be mean, merely honest. He had asked that of her, begged for it even. He couldn’t throw her overboard now that he was getting it.

Her next text came in before he could reply.

I’m sorry.

Hurt wrapped around his gut as he typed back. Don’t be. I get it. I know how hard it is for you there right now. Can I call you? Can we talk about this?

Panic seized her because she knew how easily someone could walk by that door. Can we just talk like this? I don’t want anyone to hear me.

Maybe he had never really understood the condition of her life. Maybe it was just easier not to think about it. Whatever, Luke realized then that her closing off from everyone else was both a choice and her only real option. If they couldn’t kill her physically, then they were going to do it emotionally. Isolate and destroy. Yes. They were very, very good at it. He breathed down the desire to go and tell them all off. Right now, that wouldn’t help anyone.

Okay. Then like this. But we’ll figure it out, okay? Don’t go shutting that thing off again.

Why that brought up so many tears, Sage had no idea, but it did just the same.

Okay. No shutting it off.

They talked like that for over an hour, sorting through everything—that she would be alone in California if she went back, that she was trapped in her room, that every time she made a move someone was there to cut the knees out from under her. Luke was beginning to see this picture in ways he had never imagined. No wonder she tried so hard to be two different people. If she hadn’t, they would already have taken her out.

At six he told her he needed to shower, and he did, thinking things through and through again as the water pounded over him. One thing was becoming crystal clear—he had no idea how to deal with this. He considered his options. His parents might listen, but his mom might well figure Sage going home was a good thing. Talking with her parents sounded even more desperate and frightening.

Her stepmom wanted her out, and her dad… Well, that was a question Luke couldn’t quite sort out. When he had asked to take her to the beach, her stepmom had nearly pitched an outright hissy fit, but her dad… Her dad. He just said, “Have her home by ten.”

It was the absence of any feeling that bothered Luke. Didn’t he even care? Didn’t he see what they were doing to her?

And that led to more unsettling thoughts. Namely her mother. The one in California or Kalamazoo. Or wherever she was now. Sage had told him about hearing her dad say someone had cheated on someone. She didn’t seem overly sure of the details, and he hadn’t pressed. Could the adults in her life not get it together enough to see what all of this was doing to her? That frustrated him as much as anything. How could he care so much and they care not at all? What sense did that make?

Out of the shower and back in his room, he grabbed up the cell, wishing they could talk, knowing why they couldn’t.

Suppertime, she had written. Pray for me.

Oh, he was. He definitely was.

The tension over the table was suffocating. The others talked—about Ryder’s bicycle and helmet. He needed new ones. He had grown. Jaycee said he should get a job, and they all laughed. Sage stayed in her well-worn shell, gazing down on her plate, being as invisible as possible without actually disappearing.

Maybe going home and eating alone on the couch like she normally did wouldn’t be so bad after all. It was quieter there, safer.

When supper was over, she stood and took her dishes and a pan to the sink. How could someone stand right there and be so incredibly invisible? And how could that same person wish to be seen all the while praying no one would notice her? The thoughts took over for one second too long, and the plate in her hand dropped with a clank onto the counter, making her stepmother jump.

“Honestly, Sage, can you not transfer the plates without busting all of them?”

“Sorry.”

She seemed to be saying that a lot these days.

How are you?

The message was waiting for her when she got to her room, door closed. How was she? Good question.

Trying to be all right. I think Dad’s going to call her tonight.

From all the way down the road, Luke heard the despondency in those few words. We could talk to them…

What would be the point of that? So they can yell at me and tell me that I’m destroying your life?

I hate this.

Me too.

It was truly strange how every minute of the next three days seemed fraught with danger. Sage showed up for meals and chores. Besides that, she barricaded herself in her room and prayed no one would knock. If her flight was imminent, she would never have known it. Part of her wondered what was keeping them from just putting her on the first plane out and shipping her back marked Return to Sender. Part of her just wanted to enjoy talking to him on the cell, even his texts could make her feel special, and right now, special was in very short supply in her life.

On Friday when he told her he was going shopping for the community meal, Sage felt the incredible distance between them. He could go out, do normal things. She wouldn’t dare show her face in public and certainly not with him. That bothered her, ate at her, but he kept telling her it was okay, and she hardly had the heart to make him let go. He would have to, of course, when the announcement came. But for now, she was holding onto the only thing that still made some sense in her life. Luke Baker.

As Luke stacked cans of tomato sauce in the cart, he wondered at Ms. P’s sanity. Spaghetti again? Had she learned nothing the last time? He pushed the cart down the aisle, feeling how much he had learned since then. Jaycee wasn’t along for the ride anymore, and although he was sad about that, he knew they were on vastly different sides of the fence on this one.

His thoughts traveled as they always did to Sage. He had asked if she wanted to come shopping with him. Of course, she had declined. She always would, he knew because she was afraid for him, for his reputation if he was seen with her. That still made him laugh in a way that hurt. He had told himself for so long that he didn’t care what anyone else thought that he had convinced himself it was true.

He put the noodles in the cart. Still, he didn’t care for him, but he cared immensely for her. He hated what the others thought about her, the things they said, and the things they thought when they looked at her. He had seen it, had heard it. They callously crushed her, thinking she deserved it, thinking she didn’t feel every snide glance and sideways comment. He couldn’t imagine how much awfulness she’d had to cope with since coming here, and maybe even before.

His heart turned over when he thought about her going back to California. She would, eventually, no matter what they did. But what happened if that eventuality came tomorrow? What then? Would she go back to her fabulous life and forget all about him and here? The beach? That thought could still do things to him he would never admit.

The rest of the groceries were now in the cart, and he pushed it to the front, the melancholy thoughts trailing his every step.

“Oh, Luke,” Mrs. Thompson at the checkout counter said. “Shopping for the church?”

“Yep.” He stacked the stuff on the little belt that took it to her.

“You are such a dear to help out with that like you do. So much good for so many people.”

“Uh, thanks.” The spaghetti sauce cans landed on the belt.

“So many of our young people today, all they do is think about themselves. Don’t even think about going to church much less helping out with things.”

He kept stacking, wishing she would quit talking.

“Everything is about themselves all the time.”

“Yeah.” He scratched his ear.

“It’s like they don’t even see what other people are going through, like they don’t even care.”

He dug the church’s debit card out of his wallet, hoping she would hurry.

“It wasn’t like that back in the day,” she said. “My mama and daddy would’ve tanned my hide if I’d have up and not gone to church. Yes, they would have. But these days, parents just let their kids do any whichever thing they want to do. Wear anything. Go anywhere. Do things that would’ve had me in the county jail or worse if you want to know the real truth.”

Could she not ring things up any faster? Luke held the sigh down and fought not to look at his watch.

“It’s just amazing to me, but I’m so glad you’ve turned out to be such a wonderful young man. I’m sure you’re parents are very proud.”

He let his eyes go wide, lest the words in his mind come out.

She smiled at him sweetly, told him the total and swiped the card. In minutes he was pushing the cart out to his car and loading the groceries in. Thank You, God for getting me out of there.

In the sanctuary of her room, Sage was reading the rancher book again, not because it was great but because it now held a special place in her heart because it made her think about him. He hadn’t texted in a while, and she had learned that meant he was busy. That was okay. She was glad he was busy, out living his life just as he had before she had shown up. Her gaze chanced on the calendar. The 16th of July.

Looking back so many things had changed. Looking forward even more would. “God, please be with Luke, no matter where we go from here.”

“You needing any help?” Pastor Steve entered the kitchen and held the door so it wouldn’t snap closed behind him. “I saw you over here thought I’d come check.”

“Oh.” Luke dug himself back out of the depths of the smaller refrigerator and stood. “Hey. No. I’m just putting stuff up. Thanks though.”

The pastor looked over the kitchen. “Jaycee not helping today?”

That stabbed into Luke’s heart, and he managed to keep his gaze down as he went back to the bags stacked on the long counter. “Uh, no. She was… She had other things to do.”

Pastor Steve raised his chin and lowered it. “So how are things with Jaycee and her sister? They seem kind of…”

“Like enemies?” Why make up things that they both knew were not true?

“Yeah. That’s one way to say it.”

Luke took the sauce and put it next to the stove. “Yeah, well, not great. They’ve pretty much been at each other’s throats since Sage got here.” And then a thought hit him. He stopped the unloading, turned, and leaned on the unlit stove. “You mind if I ask you something?”

The pastor shrugged. “Not at all. What’s up?”

Nodding, Luke narrowed his gaze as he thought through the question. “How long does someone have to pay for a sin? Like, you know, lying or something. I mean, do you get like ten days of guilt for that, or is it twenty?”

“No, it’s doesn’t quite work like that. I think you feel guilty so long as you think that you haven’t gotten right with God about it.”

“And how do you do that? How do you get right with God about something?”

“Well, it’s different for everyone. Sometimes you ask for forgiveness, and you feel it, and you go on. Sometimes, with some things, it’s a lot harder process. Not that it has to be. Sometimes it just is.”

Luke nodded again. “And what if it’s not something you can ask for forgiveness for? Like what if you feel guilty about being you?”

Confusion crossed the Pastor’s face. “Okay, that’s not guilt. That’s called shame, when you think there’s something wrong with you, not just your behavior.”

“Okay.”

“I think a lot of times we try to change people’s behavior by calling their worth into question over whatever they’re doing. We try to shame them into behaving how we want them to. But a person’s worth comes from God. It’s not ours to give or to take.”

“But it works, right? Telling someone they aren’t worth it makes them change what they’re doing.”

“Well, that depends on what you mean by ‘works.’ Can it change the behavior for the short term? Yes, I think it can. But I don’t think it works very well long term.”

“Why not?”

“Because for a person to make a real, lasting change in their lives—for the positive—they have to begin to see their worth as coming from a God who loves them, not as the shifting sand of what everyone else thinks. I mean, they already believe in their shame or they wouldn’t be doing what they’re doing, right? We all do very unhealthy things for ourselves and other people when we get mired in shame and the fear that comes with it.”

The groceries could have rotted on the counter for all Luke remembered them. “Fear? Like what?”

“Oh, you know, the fear that says you’re not good enough, the fear that says others’ judgment of you is right, the fear of what they will say about you. Even doing good things so people will think good of you and not say bad things is a form of shame controlling us.”

“And this shame thing, it can happen to anybody. Like even someone we think has it all together?”

Pastor Steve smiled knowingly. “It happens to all of us. We all get taught early on that who we really are isn’t good enough. Our parents say things like, ‘Be a good boy. People don’t like mean little boys.’ ‘Be a good girl. No one wants to be around a bad girl.’ Those statements aren’t about our behavior. They are about us, who we are, and we learn not to be mean, not to be bad, but we also learn not to let anyone see what we’re really feeling because if they do, they won’t like us anymore.”

Taking it all in, Luke thought through the last week. “Mind if I ask you something else?”

“Go for it.”

“What if the whole world has decided you should be ashamed of yourself, and they keep telling you that you should no matter what you do? What then?”

A second and the pastor lifted an eyebrow. “That’s a tough one. I’m not going to tell you any different because it is. I think you eventually have to bring all of that to God and let Him show you that what they’re saying isn’t the truth of you, that what really matters, all that really matters is what He thinks—not what other people say.”

Luke thought it through and through again. Could he trust the pastor with this? Could he ask for help, or would it only make things that much worse? He didn’t want that for Sage. He only wanted to help her, but he didn’t know who knew and who didn’t, and what those who didn’t would do with the information if they had it. Finally he nodded. “Thanks.”

“Anytime.” The pastor’s gaze said he knew there was more. “Anytime.”

They texted all throughout Friday night. He had asked to come over, but Jaycee was home, and Sage said she wanted nothing to do with those kinds of fireworks. She was still waiting for the guillotine to drop on her life, and Luke hated that for her.

Her mother had texted earlier in the day to say they were having a wonderful time in the sun, and beyond his ability to fathom it that she “wished Sage could see this.” Sage blew it off as if it meant nothing, but he knew it hurt her just the same.

He wished he understood the shame thing the pastor had talked about better, so he could tell her, and they could discuss it and find an answer. But the one time they got close to discussing her and her worth, she skirted the subject and told him the same could be said about him. As he lay on his bed late into the night, Luke thought about it all—about her and how the world told her who to be and how to be and then judged her for that and smacked her down because of it. He wondered just how many times that had happened. Enough, he finally decided.

It would be nice if he knew the answer to any of it, so he could somehow convince her to just be the Sage he was growing to know and love. He was sure the world would love her if they would just give her a chance to show them. Falling asleep, he dreamed about her and shifting stairs and sand that blew this way and that. It was a world he had never before inhabited, but one he now felt he could not leave her in alone. However, no matter where he looked even as he held her searching for a way to get her out, all he saw was confusion and chaos, and he didn’t know how to make any of it stop.

Chapter 22

He had come up with no solid answers the whole night, so the next morning when Luke showed up at the community kitchen, he was hardly in the mood for more problems.

“That refrigerator is 25 years old, Pastor,” Ms. P was lamenting when he came in. “It was bound to let us down sooner or later.”

“What’s up?” Luke asked, putting his hand on his head and hoping it wasn’t as dire as it sounded.

“The fridge done up and died on us. All that meat you bought yesterday is spoiled.” Ms. P threw up her hands and shook her head. “Now what are we going to feed all these folks? I know there ain’t money in the budget for this, not to mention a whole new refrigerator. And three hours ‘til it’s supposed to be out on that line too.”

Luke walked up to where the pastor’s legs were sticking out from between the big freezer and the fridge. “I would’ve put the meat in the freezer if I’d have known this…”

“Now, this ain’t your fault, Luke. It ain’t. We’ve known that fridge was on its last legs since last September. Remember, Pastor? It did this same thing back then.”

“I remember.” He didn’t sound pleased, and Luke wasn’t sure it was about the refrigerator or the whole general stack of problems confronting them.

“I can run down and get some more meat if we need it,” Luke said. “I got my check from Randy yesterday. I got enough to cover it.”

“Laws a mercy, boy. You don’t have to go and do that. That meat is expensive.”

She didn’t have to tell him. He’d seen the tab. However, as he surveyed the problem, that was the first issue that presented itself and the one most dire one needing to be fixed.

“Do we need new lettuce too?” he asked.

“Pastor, would you tell this boy that he don’t have to go and feed the whole neighborhood?”

The pastor scooted back out of the little crawl space looking utterly defeated.

Luke took one look at him and shook his head before looking at her. “Do we need lettuce too?”

Ms. P sighed and put her hands on her hips as she pursed her lips and said nothing.

“Okay. Then I’ll get lettuce too.”

“I guess you’re going to help with the meal,” Emily said to Jaycee as they sat at breakfast, the four of them, each immersed in their own world.

“Yeah.”

“You didn’t go help Luke with the groceries yesterday.”

Jaycee’s gaze did that sideways glance thing that she always did when she wished Sage would disappear but she hadn’t. “No.”

Her stepmother nodded. “Will you be home afterward?”

“Probably.”

There was no mention of Sage going, and she certainly wasn’t about to ask.

The hamburger meat hit the belt followed by the lettuce and a few tomatoes. At this rate, Luke wasn’t even sure they would get it all cut up, but he couldn’t think about that now. All he could focus on was getting the items back to the kitchen and cooked as fast as possible.

When the clerk told him the total, he let out a breath and counted out the cash. So much for getting something nice for Sage.

His text came in a little after ten, and Sage grabbed up her phone.

Hope your day’s going better than mine. Hope you’re coming ‘cause I could sure use a hug.

Oh. Her heart hurt as she sent her reply. Sorry. Not coming. You’ll have to have fun doing dishes without me.

Luke’s gaze snagged on the big red pickup sitting cattycorner to all the parking lines in the lot, and he grabbed his nerves up by the collar. “Not today, Harris. I don’t have time.”

He spun into the lot, making sure to go all the way around the red pickup and the driver of which. Just as he crossed past it, however, he saw the lone car sitting in the area where most everyone else parked, and his heart did a little dance in his chest. Jaycee was here and that meant Sage was too. Finally, something would go right.

At the parking spot closest to the back door, he parked and crawled out from behind the wheel, his attention suddenly homing to the figure leaning on the driver’s door of the red pickup. Sage?

Anger and hate bled through him, and then he realized his mistake. It wasn’t Sage. It was Jaycee.

“Hey, Baker!” Rory yelled with a backward bob of his head, and Luke shook his head as if he had to have some nerve showing up like this.

Jaycee turned halfway and looked over at Luke before turning back to Rory. Rory took one more look at him and then as if he’d practiced it a thousand times, he put his hand out of the window and onto her. In the next second Luke stood, paralyzed in place as Rory kissed her until Luke wasn’t sure how she could even keep breathing.

When the kiss ended, Rory pounded on the side of his truck door and let out a whoop. Then he saluted Luke. “Later.”

And with that he hit the gas and left Jaycee standing right there. She put her hands up on her arms before turning on one foot, looking happier than Luke had ever seen her. When she got to him, she simply smiled and went right on in, never asking if she could help or doing more than laughing at the horrified look he was sure was plastered all over his face.

Rage poured into him as he felt the buzz of his phone. Yanking it out, he swiped it on as he opened the trunk for the groceries. One look at the message, and he uttered the most ironic word of the day. “Perfect.”

Sage hoped he wouldn’t be mad. It stunk that he was having a bad day. He didn’t deserve a bad day. “Dear Jesus, please help Luke’s day get better.”

“Do you want to tell me what that was?” Luke swung the bags onto the counter heedless of the other two people in the kitchen listening.

Jaycee was at the sink, washing her hands, and she shrugged. “What do you care?”

“What do I…?” Luke could well have throttled her. “Rory Harris? Rory. Harris? Are you kidding me?”

“What?” She bobbed her head as she wiped her hands on the dishtowel. “We’ve been going out a few times.”

Livid didn’t touch it. “Seriously. You have got to be joking.” He put his hands to his head, knowing he was making a scene but not really caring. “Did you not see what he did to your sister?”

But Jaycee rolled her eyes. “My sister is a tramp.”

“Why you…”

Thankfully Pastor Steve had heard and known this was about to come to blows. “Luke, would you help me get the line in place?” He took one look at both of them. “Now? Please?”

Luke glared at her, shook his head and headed out to the line.

“Jaycee, you help Ms. P,” the pastor said.

Outside the kitchen Luke was already struggling with the long metal and wood line. It was on wheels but in his current state of mind, that wasn’t helping much. The pastor came out and positioned himself on the other side so that together, they slid the thing out and into place.

“Mind telling me what that was about?” he asked Luke, coming over as Luke made the final adjustments to the placement of the thing.

“Jaycee’s being a jerk. That’s what.” The heat in him hadn’t dissipated a molecule. “She is bound and determined to run Sage right into the ground, and I’ll be honest, it’s working.” He hadn’t thought anything through, and the anger was making his normal filters short-circuit. “And now she’s going out with Rory? What is she thinking?”

“Jealousy will do that to someone,” the pastor said albeit quietly.

“Jealousy?”

“Of Sage.” The pastor sounded so calm about all of it. “She’s been angry ever since Sage got here.”

That much was true, but it was more than that now. “Sage didn’t even come today.”

“I noticed that.”

“Yeah. I mean I’ve been over to see her, but she isn’t going anywhere where she can be seen—not to normal stuff.”

“Like church?” And there was more to that than the question.

Luke exhaled. “I know what you think… about last week. But that wasn’t Sage, not the real Sage. She just… she has this…” He couldn’t even put it into words. “She’s so hurt, and I don’t blame her, and Jaycee isn’t helping, and neither are her folks.”

“Sounds serious.”

He nodded. “And I can’t make heads or tails of any of it. I mean, I want to help her, them—even Jaycee, but I just… I don’t know how.” The emotions started to catch up to him. “I mean I go to church every weekend, and I try to listen and stuff, but it’s not doing me any good out here, in the real world, with this, with them. I just feel so incredibly helpless.”

Pastor Steve nodded. His gaze checked back into the kitchen and he let out a breath. “Tell you what, after we get done today, why don’t you come by my office? Maybe we can sort some of this out together?”

For the first time in a week, Luke’s spirit relaxed. “You wouldn’t mind?”

“Not at all.”

For the rest of the afternoon, Luke and Jaycee acted like the other wasn’t even there. He helped, filled the line, refilled it, cooked the sauce, did the dishes, and she did whatever he wasn’t doing at the moment. They apparently had agreed without consulting the other that staying out of each other’s way was better than having a screaming match for the whole world to hear.

After the last dish was washed and Luke’s heart hurt from missing Sage so much he could hardly take another breath, he locked up and headed across the parking lot to the parsonage. The parking lot was empty once again, and he was glad to see the little blue car gone as well. He didn’t want to fight with her, but how in the world could he save her from herself?

With that question and half a million others swirling around in his head, he went up the three steps and rang the doorbell. Standing there, he felt incredibly exposed to all the world for no reason he could articulate, and he put his hand up to the back of his head hoping someone would hurry.

“Oh, Luke,” Mrs. Mitchell said. “Steve said you’d be by. Come on in.”

“Uh, thanks.” Luke ducked inside suddenly feeling like he was hopelessly underdressed and out-of-place. He put his fingers to his hair and raked there three times trying to get himself presentable, which was both hopeless and pointless. He smelled like spaghetti and had stains from his bout with the dishes all over him. Presentable wasn’t happening any time soon.

“I know, Ericka, believe me, I know.”

Sage was on her way to the den when the voice, her father’s, at the bend in the hallway stopped her. She should keep going, shouldn’t listen, but her feet weren’t moving and neither was her heart.

“I know we talked about her being here all summer, and I really wanted it to work, but…”

Every pause felt like flipping her over the rocky side of a cliff. Even breathing hurt.

“Yeah. I’ve already looked at the flights, and I think we could swing the one on Wednesday.”

Tears sprang to her eyes as Sage ducked her head and fought to make them stop stinging so badly.

“I just don’t want her to be alone when she gets back. You don’t have anybody? A neighbor? A friend?”

How thoughtful, how caring. Bitterness bit into her, and she exhaled hard.

“Yeah. Yeah. I know. We’ve tried to make it work. It’s just with Jaycee and everything. Thing’s have really gotten complicated.”

Complicated. There was a good word.

“Okay. Well, see if they can do it, and let me know so I can get this flight booked. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Bye.”

She had to move, had to get out of here. How she did it, she could never have said, but in the next breath she was back in her room, the door closed, with her pressed up against it lest he show up to actually tell her every plan he’d made for her life without so much as talking to her.

Luke was surprised when Pastor Steve sat not at his desk but in the small sitting area by the window. The pastor sat in the wing-backed chair and Luke on the threadbare couch, wondering why in the world he had thought this a good idea. What was he supposed to say? Everything he wanted to, he couldn’t. Everything he could would make no difference. He folded his fingers together and looked down at them, thinking he should never have agreed to this.

“Before we start,” Pastor Steve said, “I wanted to tell you how grateful we are to you. Your work with the kitchen and the community meals…”

However, Luke waved that off. “It’s not a big deal. I like to help.”

“I know, and I appreciate that.” Sitting for a moment, the pastor twined his own fingers. “And if I don’t miss my guess, that’s also why you’re here because you like to help. Am I right?”

Luke couldn’t argue so he didn’t. “Yeah, pretty much I guess. I just… I don’t know what to do with this one, you know? I mean there’s Sage, and she’s great, and… well, you know. And then there’s Jaycee. And if it was just that, okay, whatever, teenage drama, get over it. But it’s not. There’s this stuff with Sage’s folks, and Jaycee’s all throwing herself at guys who are not healthy for her to be with, and…” He let out a hard breath. “I just feel so…”

“Helpless?”

He shrugged slightly.

However, Pastor Steve nodded. “There are a lot of things in this world, things that happen, things we can’t control that bother us deeply. It’s easy to get caught up in those things and not know what to do or how to do it.”

That brought Luke’s gaze up. “Really? I mean, you get like that too?”

Pastor Steve smiled softly. “Yes. Especially when I see people I really care about hurting so badly.” He sat forward. “So why don’t you tell me what’s going on, and we’ll see if we can’t figure it out together?”

Wednesday. Wednesday. The word kept going through her like a radio you can’t get to shut off. She was leaving Wednesday. In one breath the tears pooled in her eyes again. Knowing nothing else to do, she grabbed up her phone and sent him a text. Yes, he was probably still washing dishes or cleaning up. No, she didn’t want to bother him or burden him, but she needed help, and she needed it now.

The phone in his pocket buzzed and then buzzed again. Embarrassed, Luke stopped trying to explain and reached into his pocket. “I’m sorry. It’s probably my mom telling me to pick up bread.” He pulled it out with every intention of shutting the thing off, but when his gaze read the words, his heart froze.

I’m leaving Wednesday.

Air slid from his lungs as Luke stared at it, knowing what it meant but wondering everything else about it. Had they just told her? Were the tickets purchased? Was this a done deal? It sure sounded like one. He shook his head, turned the phone, and texted back quickly.

“Something wrong?” the pastor asked, indicating the phone.

When Luke looked up at him, the truth was he just couldn’t hold this any longer. “She’s leaving.”

Understanding went through the older man’s eyes. “Sage you mean?”

Hurt crumpled over all the pain he’d been crushing inside of him, and he barely managed to beat it back. “They’re sending her home on Wednesday.”

“And this is a new development? It wasn’t expected?”

“No. She was supposed to go in August before school starts. Her parents aren’t even going to be home when she gets there.” Frustration punched out of him. “This is such an unbelievable mess, and it’s killing her.” He let out a breath as he finished the text and put the phone back into his pocket. “I don’t know. Maybe it’s better if she goes back. Maybe I’m just being selfish for wanting her to stay.” He looked to the pastor for some confirmation of that. “Am I? Am I just being selfish?”

“Well, I don’t know. You said she is having a hard time here.”

“She is. They treat her like…” At the last second he swallowed the word. “Not very good. She’s in her room all day long unless she’s doing chores or going with them somewhere so everyone thinks they’re this big happy family. It’s all such an act. I mean, even her. She’s like this fantasy girl until you get to know her, and then you realize that she’s real, that she has real feelings and that she bleeds real blood.”

The pastor never said anything, just sat there nodding.

“And then there’s this whole act thing she’s got going on when she’s not at home. And everyone, that’s what they expect her to be, but we were finally starting to get through that, under that, to something that was real, or I thought was real, and now, they’re sending her home because none of them want to deal with what having her here really means.”

“What does it mean?”

“That they’ve got problems. That they’re not perfect. That Sage was conceived and born out of wedlock even though Mr. Lawrence was already married to Mrs. Lawrence.”

Understanding began to dawn in the pastor’s eyes.

One part of Luke realized that he had just completely ruined their reputation. He wanted to feel bad about that, but honestly, he could hardly care about them. “And Sage is the result of that. I mean how do you get past that? How do you forgive and forget something like that and move on? She can’t move on. They can’t move on. So maybe it is better for her to just go back and forget North Carolina ever existed.”

“Do you really think that’s better?”

“What’s the other option? Cage match here to the death? Last person standing keep the secret forever? What?” He shook his head. “I mean, you should see them with her. They talk about her behind her back, ream her out for every little mistake. She can’t do anything right. Nothing.”

“Does she want to go back home?”

That stopped him, and he studied his fingernails without seeing them. “No. Well, probably part of her does, but…”

“But?”

Luke glanced up at him. “Well, honestly, we just started like going out and stuff—her and me, and I felt like we were making a real connection, you know?”

“And the others don’t like this connection?”

“Oh, my gosh, no. They hate it. They hate me, but they hate her even more. They keep telling her she is going to ruin my reputation.”

“Just like she ruined her father’s.”

That one was hard to hear though he knew that’s what they thought. “But that wasn’t her fault.”

“I’m not saying it was. I’m saying that her being here is a direct reflection of the fact that the family has issues, problems, that it isn’t perfect.”

“Yeah. Something like that.”

“Let me ask you a question.”

“Okay.”

“Where is love in any of this?”

Luke raised his eyebrows. “Um, well…”

“Or is it all fear?”

That was easier. “Fear. Yeah. Mostly fear. I mean I think they took her in because maybe they thought she would fit right in or something, but when she didn’t… so…. yeah, lots of fear.” He was nodding now, thinking back through everything. “Especially Jayc. She hated the idea from minute one. I about had to talk her off the ledge when she found out.”

“Because…?”

“Because she’s jealous and because she just wishes Sage would not even be in the picture at all.”

“So she is making it hard for Sage to be in the picture.”

“Impossible. You can’t hardly have the two of them in the same room without someone completely losing it.”

“And Sage hates Jaycee as well?”

That stopped him. He hadn’t considered that question. “No, but nothing she does is ever good enough. And now Jaycee and her mom have teamed up so it’s two on one, and Sage doesn’t stand a chance. It’s drama, drama, drama all the time.”

“Do you know where all that drama comes from?” the pastor asked.

“Uh, no. Hadn’t really thought about it. Where?”

“When we humans do not feel loved, worth it, or connected, that’s when the drama starts. Drama is a sign that someone is hurting. We lash out or turn that disconnection we feel in on ourselves, thinking it must be our fault we aren’t connecting. Remember when we talked about shame?”

Luke nodded.

“Well, shame is this thing that gets in us and tells us we’re not good enough, that the world is judging us and that we have a right to judge ourselves. We take all this stuff we’re supposed to be, expectations that we know we can’t live up to, and we beat ourselves over the head with them. We kill our spirits over it, and then we start to turn that out into the world.

“We become angry and bitter. We blame everyone else while all the while truly tearing ourselves down. Would you not agree that everyone we’re discussing has some of these traits? Fear? Anger? Bitterness? Jealousy? Hatred?”

Yes, he could see that, and Luke nodded. “But how do you ever untangle all of that? How can you ever get past it?”

“Well, what you don’t do is throw gold paint on it and hope nobody notices. That will never work.”

“So what does?”

“Ultimately love if you can ever get to it. Don’t you see? They are all hurt, and they all need love—desperately. Out of curiosity, do you know what shame’s number one rule is?”

He hadn’t realized shame had rules. “Uh, no.”

“Don’t talk.”

Why he was expecting something much longer, he didn’t know, but that surprised him. “Don’t talk?”

“Don’t talk. Don’t talk about it. Keep the secret. Lock it in a closet and hope no one ever goes in there or finds out. Why? Because talking about it does something to you. It allows you to open your heart to another person which is…?”

“Connection.”

“Right. And connection is one of shame’s worst enemies. When we really connect, shame has nowhere to hide.”

Luke’s thoughts traced back to the beach and her yelling at him that this was who she was and how she was. “That’s why Sage is different with me?”

“Because?”

“We connected. We got to know each other. Not the plastic thing she was trying to be, but the real Sage. I mean, we’ve talked about stuff, stuff I know she didn’t want to talk about, but we did.”

Pastor Steve nodded. “There are three keys to unlocking shame’s hold—courage, compassion, and connection. Courage because doing this work is not easy, and people are going to freak out on you completely when you try.”

Luke could attest to that.

“Compassion which is when we really allow each other to be real and love even the parts that are not perfect or very pretty. And connection. Not this judgmental, I’ll love you if you meet my checklist criteria. But real, deep, abiding love that says, ‘I’m in your corner. I’m here for you. No matter what.’”

Thinking it all through, Luke nodded. “I get that that’s the answer for Sage. I can see that, or some of it. But Jaycee and her folks? They would run the other direction from connecting and working through this.”

“They already are.”

“Well, that’s true.” Luke sat back and heaved a breath. “Wednesday. So do you think they all think everything is going to go back to how it was before once she’s gone?”

“Probably. Will it?”

There was no other answer. “No.”

Chapter 23

“Rory should be here in a little while,” Jaycee said as they all sat, eating a very quiet Saturday evening meal.

Instantly father and stepmother exchanged glances as Sage’s spoon froze over her soup and refused to move. Rory? Worry hit her with two fists. Oh, Jaycee. No.

“Oh?” Emily asked as if she was just learning the word.

“Yeah, he said he’d pick me up.” Jaycee shrugged. “We’re just going out to the bonfire. No biggie.”

Clearly the parents questioned that, and Sage couldn’t say she blamed them. Her stomach had suddenly lost what little appetite it had. Between Wednesday and this news, she was surprised she had eaten anything at all. Luke was positively going to freak out.

The talk with the pastor had given Luke so much to think about his head was spinning by the time he drove by their house on the way to his. Don’t talk. Don’t talk. Don’t talk. The little house seemed to whisper just that phrase.

He had seen real underneath the facade, but he wondered as he drove what he would know if he had only seen the outside. A perfect family, yes. Really they were. They had been. Until…

His heart hurt to think that way, that Sage’s arrival had marked the end of their perfection, but it was true. If she hadn’t come, then none of this would have happened. He would still be pining over Jaycee who would never love him back, and Sage would be off in California living her wonderful…

Midway through that thought, he stopped. He knew enough to know Sage’s life hadn’t been perfect. No, he didn’t know all of the details, but maybe he could ask.

He put his hand to his mouth because the very thought of asking drove an irrational fear right through him. Don’t ask. She doesn’t want to talk about that. You don’t want to hurt her…

And then, for the first time in maybe forever, he stopped long enough to hear what he was thinking. As if he was having a conversation with himself, he let the thoughts come but instead of thinking them, he listened to them.

Don’t ask her. She doesn’t want to talk…

Don’t ask.

Don’t talk.

Don’t go there.

It was the same thing Pastor Steve had talked about. Shame’s Number One rule. Don’t talk. Can’t talk about that. Don’t say that. Don’t ask that.

Wow. He was right.

And what had he said about courage being needed to break out of that? Luke let out a long breath. He felt to the core of him how much courage this was going to take.

However, they only had until Wednesday. That wasn’t enough time for all of this. Why even start when they would never…. Or was that just more of the shame and fear talking?

He parked in front of his parents’ house and shut the car off, sitting there in the fading light for another few minutes. His mom would probably think he was crazy, but he had to ask someone.

More than anything in the world, Sage wanted to go down to her sister’s room and talk her out of this horrible, awful, no-good idea of going out with Rory Harris. Why couldn’t Jaycee see that Rory was just using her to get back at Luke and probably at her as well? And Jaycee was just mad enough at all of them to let him do it and never see the train wreck coming her way.

Sage shook her head as she sat on her bed. “Why do I even care? I’m leaving Wednesday. What does it even matter?”

But it did, and she couldn’t explain that.

“Luke? You’re home late,” his mother said when he came into the kitchen. “Everything okay?”

How many times had he said yes when the real answer was no? Connection. Courage. Good idea or bad, he was going for it. “Yeah, but I’m not staying.”

His mother sighed like she knew what he wasn’t saying. Except this time, he was.

“I’m going over to Sage’s.”

More disappointment slid onto her face, the face he so loved so much and did not ever want to disappoint. “Luke. Are you sure that’s a good idea?”

“Have you ever made a mistake, Mom?”

Surprise jumped through the disappointment. “A mistake? Of course.”

“No. A big mistake, a really big one that you couldn’t fix.”

Softness began overtaking the surprise. “A few of them.”

“Did you deserve to be forgiven for that mistake?”

Clearly she didn’t want to answer. “No.”

“But God forgave you anyway, didn’t He?”

She nodded.

“Sometimes the only way to fix something is to forgive and love anyway.”

“Luke…”

“They need to know that about Sage. She needs to know it too.”

“Are you sure that’s possible?”

“No. I’m not.”

Sage made it all the way down the hall to the bathroom, telling herself that she had to say something, something to stop Jaycee. However, when her sister came out of her room, nearly bumping into her, all Sage could get out was, “Oh, excuse me.”

Without even making eye contact, Jaycee brushed past her and swept out into the kitchen. “Later gaters.”

This wasn’t her problem. So why did it hurt so badly to see Jaycee making such a huge mistake?

At their back door, Luke reached up and knocked. Just being here took every atom of courage he possessed. When no one came, he knocked again, and then Mrs. Lawrence appeared.

Love anyway, his spirit whispered.

“Luke?” she asked, not sounding overly pleased.

“Hi, Mrs. Lawrence. I know this is unexpected, but could I talk with Sage?”

She set her jaw, and it was clear she wanted to tell him no. At that moment the sound of a monster invaded the stillness, and Mrs. Lawrence looked past him out to it. Something very close to despair crossed her face.

“See y’all,” Jaycee said, whisking through the door and past both of them.

Luke had to take a step back to avoid being run over. Then he understood both the look and the situation. The red Dodge pulled into the driveway, and Jaycee never so much as slowed down as she went around it and hopped in. When Luke turned back, Mrs. Lawrence’s face was awash in pain and hopelessness. She looked at him, sighed, and shook her head.

“Come on in.”

“Knock. Knock,” Luke said as he stood at Sage’s open bedroom door.

She looked up but couldn’t be surprised. She had known he was coming even if he hadn’t said it outright. “Hey.” The greeting was soft and knowing.

“Hey.”

Strange how he just stood there, taking her in as she let him.

“You up for a drive?” he finally asked, and she looked down at herself.

“Sure.”

As Luke drove only out to the little inlet between his house and hers, he wondered how even to start the conversation. She seemed so different tonight, kind of like she had given up, but softer than that or just different, he couldn’t tell. At the crest of the little hill, he guided the car just over it and stopped.

Sage looked around in confusion. “Well, that was a long drive.”

Longer than she knew.

“Come on.” He got out of the car and went around to help her out.

She didn’t look any less skeptical when she got out. “You brought me out to a field?”

“Bet nobody’s ever done that before,” he said with a laugh.

“Well, you’re right about that.”

He took her hand and walked to the side of the hood of the car where he turned to her.

She arched her eyebrows. “Is there a reason we’re standing in a field?”

“Kinda.” Facing her, he lifted her and set her on the hood of the car as interest and skepticism crossed her face.

“Okay?”

“Don’t move,” he said and he sprinted to the front where he launched himself up onto the hood in one bound. It didn’t matter. The thing was dented anyway. He went all the way up to the windshield and sat back down. Then he tipped his head. “Come here.”

Still looking uncertain, Sage did as instructed, scooting over the warm car hood to his side. When she was there, he put his arm out and she settled down into it.

At that moment, the world opened up into a panorama before them. The gentle hills rolling out before them left the sky above exposed just as twilight began to take over in earnest.

“Oh, wow.” Sage could hardly believe the simple beauty of the spot.

“I thought you’d like it,” he said, settling back.

However, as peaceful as it should have been, the second she was silent all of the bad stuff came rushing back. “Jaycee…”

“I know.”

Sage nodded, feeling worried enough for the both of them. “And Wednesday….”

“I know,” he said again, shifting once on his other forearm behind his head before growing still.

“I’m worried for her,” Sage said softly.

Luke nodded. “You care about her, don’t you?”

The question threw Sage for a moment. “Should I not?”

“No. You should. Does it surprise you that you do?”

“Kind of, I guess. I mean, I get it, you know. I get why she’s been so mean. I’m not happy about it, but I get it.” She snuggled deeper. “I get why they all hate me, why everything’s been so hard. That’s why I think Wednesday might not be such a bad idea. At least then, everyone can go on with their lives without me messing everything up.”

“Do you want to leave?”

Tears she hadn’t known were there slipped from her heart onto her lashes, but she said nothing.

“You don’t, do you?”

Slowly she shook her head next to his shoulder. “Isn’t that stupid?”

“No,” he breathed. “But I am curious about why you want to stay.”

That question was harder to answer, much harder because she didn’t want to be that honest. She shook her head again. “When I think about here and then I think about going home, back to California…” Looking deep into the nothingness that was slowly enveloping them, she put her arms over herself. “I mean, I’m sure I can find something to entertain myself there, but it’s just not going to be the same.”

“As?”

She looked up at him. “Here.”

Luke felt what she was telling him. “Have you talked… to your dad… about staying?”

“My dad?” She sounded positively petrified at the suggestion.

“Yeah. Maybe he’d let you stay if he knew you wanted to.”

For a long moment she said nothing. “I don’t… we don’t… really… talk like that. Like actual conversations. I wouldn’t even know what to say to him.”

“Do you talk about anything? Sports? School? Fashion?”

Sage laughed at that. “Have you seen his ties? Those are not my fault.”

He angled his gaze down to her. “What, are they bad?”

“Hideous! They look like second hand thrift store knock-offs.”

“You ever think about getting him one?”

“A tie?”

“Yeah.”

“Uh. No. First off, Emily would skin me alive if I gave him something like that. Second of all, where am I going to get a tie? I haven’t seen a mall in months. Third of all, no, that is a very bad idea.”

Luke considered that as a different thought hit him. “So what is the weirdest thing about being here—in North Carolina, I mean?”

She didn’t answer right away, but Luke was learning, don’t press, just listen. “How different everything is. It’s like… it’s like looking in a mirror almost. Like everything in California is all glamor and image. Out here it still is, but in a different way. Here the image is about being a certain way. Like you, being a good guy who goes out and does good things. I don’t know, it’s hard to explain.”

And then she fell silent.

“Well, I thought you were doing a pretty good job of it.”

This sigh was long and slow. “I just… it’s like everything is so different. Almost like I’m different.”

She was, and he knew it, but he wasn’t going to tell her that.

“Like going to the beach the other day. I mean, who was that? I was not dressed for a day at the beach at all, and my hair ugh, and I haven’t done my nails in a week.” Putting them out for his inspection, she shook her head. “Back home, I would never have done that in a million-gazillion years.” Then she sighed again. “Even just being here with you, like this. I’d have never done this with a guy back home. We’d have to make plans on Monday for what we were doing Friday. I didn’t just go out for no reason. There had to be a party or somewhere to at least go. We didn’t go and park out in a field and talk.”

“I’m kind of liking talking.”

Her smile was soft with a slight smirk on the edge of it. “Don’t tell anyone but so do I. Although if anyone ever found out, it would totally ruin my reputation.”

“So what was your reputation? Back home? Good girl? Bad girl?”

“Somewhere in between. Mostly I was mid-tier money. More than most, not as much as some.” She shook her head. “But enough to have an attitude about it.” She shivered.

“You cold?”

“A little.”

He gathered her closer to him.

Memories slid over other memories until Sage could hardly tell what was what. “We weren’t always rich. Not when I was little.”

Luke’s easy casualness melted slightly into concern or deep pensiveness, she couldn’t tell which. Still he got even quieter if that was possible.

“I remember our old apartment. It was real dingy, kind of brown. Lots of brown. The carpet, the furniture. Mom was probably renting that place. I don’t think we owned it. No, I’m sure we didn’t.” She squinted into the memories, trying to see them more clearly. “She was gone a lot, to work and school. But on Saturdays…” Light and life suddenly filled her whole spirit in ways she couldn’t put into words. It was like opening a window after the place had been shut up too long. “We would go on adventures. That’s what she called them. To the park or the zoo.

“We’d go to the pottery place and make bowls.” Sage laughed. “Mine were always horrible. I could never get them to end up in one piece. Or we’d get out the paints and spread things out on the coffee table and the carpet. I was terrible at it, but she was amazing.”

Crazy how long it had been since she had thought about that. “She was an amazing artist.” Then the nice memories dimmed. “But art doesn’t pay the bills. She worked super hard and eventually became a lawyer. And then one day, she met Jason. He was a client or a lawyer-banker person, something or other. They met, fell in love, and we moved.”

True melancholy invaded her spirit as if the window had suddenly slammed closed. “We didn’t paint after that. The furniture was all white, and it was too easy to make a mess. Jason hates messes.” She pushed a strand of hair over her ear, sinking into the memories. “I remember one time, one of the nannies was telling me I was being such a baby about everything, and she said, ‘Your mama works very hard to give you these nice things. You should be grateful.’” She sniffed back the tears that had somehow begun sliding down her cheeks. “I didn’t care about the stuff. I just wanted my mama.”

Luke gently pulled her into him. “Oh, darlin’.”

They stayed like that, on the car, just talking until night took hold in earnest. Luke picked his wrist up and blinked at his watch. “What time are you supposed to be home?”

“I guess midnight, like it would make any difference. What’re they going to do, ground me until Wednesday?”

Still Luke rolled off his side of the car and came around as she slid off the front.

“I think we don’t take any chances, and maybe they’ll reconsider,” he said, standing right in front of her.

Sage put her arms up and over his shoulders, feeling the happiness floating through her. “I never thought I could feel like this, you know? Like just totally real, and that you would look at me like that.”

He tipped his head to the side. “Like what?”

Sly mischievousness slid to her face. “Like you want to kiss me ‘til my toes curl.”

His eyebrows bounced up. “’Til your toes curl?”

“Yeah, and you’re good at it,” she said as he slid down so her arm came all the way around his shoulder and he picked her up.

“Like this?”

“Yeah,” she breathed, “something like that.”

She would never get used to this feeling—his lips on hers. Caressing. Searching. Melding until her mind shut off completely and life no longer even mattered.

When he broke the kiss and simply looked down at her, all she could do was melt into his arms and his warmth. “How am I ever going to get on that plane?”

“You’re home early,” Emily said when Sage came in the back door after leaving him in the driveway. Floating was so very easy to do with him around. It was so much harder when he left.

“Oh, yeah. We didn’t go out to the bonfire,” Sage said, knowing she should censor what information she gave her stepmother and what she shouldn’t, but it was all so amazing that trying to figure out what might get her into trouble and what wouldn’t simply no longer computed. “We just sat and talked for a while.”

“You’ve been gone two hours.”

Sage nodded. “I know. It was nice.”

Emily looked somewhere between screaming at her and not believing a word she said.

“Well, I’m going to bed.” Sage headed to the little hallway where she turned. “Oh, and Luke asked me to go to his grandparents’ tomorrow? Something about chicken?”

Getting ready for church had never been so arduous a task as it was the next morning. Each thing Sage pulled out of the suitcases looked wrong. Too serious. Not serious enough. Too casual. Not casual enough. Too flashy. Way too flashy. How she wished there was a mall within driving distance. When she was almost out of options, she came upon a soft chiffon satin, blue and green maxi dress she’d gotten on a whim on a shopping trip with Patelyn. Holding it up, she asked herself what the world would think of it, what Luke would think of it, if it would give anyone a reason to gossip if he was standing next to her in it.

Suddenly, that mattered in ways it never had before. Standing there, at the mirror, Sage only wanted to be good enough to stand by him. He deserved better than the best. The question was, could she ever hope to be that for him.

The middle of Luke’s heart lifted off and soared the second his gaze brushed hers when she entered the church, and he couldn’t stop the grin. From the other side of the lobby by his mother, he left the conversation and strode right over to her. Hair down in soft waves over the modest but incredible green, white, and blue flowing dress. He’d never seen anything as beautiful as she was at that moment. Containing his heart and his happiness was going to be a real challenge. “Hey.”

“Hey,” she breathed, her gaze touching his before falling between them. How could she look so unsure of herself? She was spellbinding. Magical. Mind-blowing.

He tilted his head, looking only at her. “You got a minute?”

Both of her parents watched, clearly wanting to say something but getting nothing out.

“Uh.” She looked back at them. “Um, sure.”

Carefully between them he took her hand, and he just couldn’t stop the grin or the soaring of his heart. “Come on. I want you to meet some people.”

Meet some people? Sage hadn’t counted on this. What was he doing? Didn’t he know about other people and what they thought of her? Didn’t he know they could tell him he was being an idiot for being with her? Didn’t he feel all the others looking at them as the crossed the lobby? Clutching his arm, lest she get lost on the trip from one side of the lobby to the other, she followed him, nearly hiding behind him. On the other side of the lobby, he stepped up to a small knot of women, and Sage thought she might seriously pass out because the blood had gone to her head and stopped there.

“Hi, everyone. I’d like you to meet Sage.” Luke carefully extracted her from behind him and brought her to his side, holding her there in case she decided to run.

When Sage looked up in trepidation, she was relieved to see that one of the women was his mother. However, she couldn’t tell if she should be thankful or not because nothing was making much sense.

“Oh, Sage?” his mother said, glancing beyond her to the other side of the lobby where her parents were. “It’s nice to see you again.”

“It’s nice to see you too, Mrs. Baker.” It was fully possible that she was going to pull his hand and arm apart from the rest of him because even with him right there, she was in full panic mode.

“And this is my mother,” Mrs. Baker said. “Mrs. Cameron.”

Forcing her hand to detach from his, Sage offered her hand to the very small older lady. “It’s nice to meet you, Ma’am.”

“Well.” The first words that went through the lady’s eyes were not what she ended with. “It’s lovely to meet you too, my dear.”

“And this,” Luke said, “is my sister, Priscilla. She’s here from Virginia.”

Sage extended her hand to the rather tall young lady with the nice handbag and professional dress. Maybe she should have worn something more formal. She felt hopelessly underdressed. “Nice to meet you.”

“You too, Sage.” And inexplicably the young woman’s face broke into a broad smile. “Will you be joining us this afternoon?”

Air jammed into the top of Sage’s lungs. They had talked about it, but she wasn’t at all sure it had been cleared with the others—his mother, her parents. At that moment, she felt the warmth of his hand settle on her back, and what was left of her sanity scattered from her body and soul.

“We talked about it,” Luke said, and his gaze came down to hers drawing hers up into his.

And everything upon everything disappeared from her consciousness. Oh, no! What were they talking about? What planet was she on? She suddenly had no clue, and part of her really didn’t care. She could look into his eyes forever and never so much as miss the rest of the world.

“Did you ask your parents?” Luke asked, looking right at her.

Her eyes widened because she could hardly tell what language he was speaking. “My… Oh!” She jerked hard to get the trance to let go, but it never really did. “Uh, um. Yes. I mean, I asked but…”

Help! Her gaze said when it came back up to his, and his smile lifted only one side of his mouth as his eyes meshed with hers.

After a moment, his gaze went to the others, and Sage felt like she’d fallen into another dimension with no hope of getting back to reality.

“We’ll talk with them after the service,” he said. “Maybe Mom can talk to them.” He looked at his mother as did everyone else in the group.

“Oh, of… of course,” his mother said.

Then he looked at his watch. “I’d better get Sage back with her folks.”

Great. Yeah, no danger at all in doing that. Still, she managed to nod at the others. “It was wonderful to meet you all.”

He turned her, which was good because she wasn’t really anchored to space and time any longer. Halfway across to her family, he leaned down. “Don’t worry, Mom will talk your stepmom into it. She’s good at that.”

Into what? Sage wanted to ask, knowing she should know, but having an amazing amount of trouble figuring out what was happening. Had she really just met his grandmother and his sister? Crazy how much that felt like a dream.

“Priscilla wanted to meet Sage,” Luke said when they made it back to her family. He felt the ice of Jaycee’s stare, but he was done with living to please her. She was a big girl, and she would get over it. “She’s down for the weekend.”

“Oh, how nice,” Mrs. Lawrence said, glancing at Sage. It was unbelievable how much displeasure the woman could convey with a single look. “Well, we’d better get inside or we’ll be late.”

“Sure thing.” Luke lifted his head and nodded. Then as they all started for the door, he snagged Sage’s movement for one second as he ducked down to her. “I’ll see ya after.”

Tears came to her eyes as she gazed up at him in that moment. Pouring from him was total acceptance, total love, and total joy at just being with her. She had never felt anything like it. “K.”

Chapter 24

The service passed in a blur for Sage. At one point, Luke came down the aisle with the basket, and whole parts of her said not to look at him, but the part that counted smiled at him, and he smiled back. Her heart could hardly hold that moment. Over and over again, she tried to think through it all, to think how someone like him had taken her hand and led her into being this person. Someone she remembered but had thought was gone forever.

When the last prayer was said, she waited with the others to exit, hanging back just enough so they went on without her. He was at the back of that aisle, handing out the little white papers. White shirt, black jacket, black tie slightly askew. He was a fashion disaster who could not have pulled it off better if he was trying. Sage wondered if she was allowed to talk with him in here. It seemed somehow wrong, and she was still supremely conscious of the others, watching and assessing.

Ten more steps and it was just the two of them at the back pew. He grinned at her, and her heart flipped.

“You finished?” she asked, not at all sure what his duties entailed.

“Sure. Hang on, just a sec. K?”

“K.” It was unbelievable how one little syllable could do that to a girl—hope, apprehension, and joy all rolled into one sound. She stood there and watched him go over to the little table where he spoke to an older gentleman who looked over to her.

“Can I help you?” he asked, but Luke stopped him.

“She’s with me.”

“Oh.” Surprise and then more surprise lit the man’s eyes. “Okay. Well, you’re done here. Go on. Have a great day.”

“You too.” With that Luke came over to her. “You ready?”

Why she couldn’t get the anxiety to leave her alone, she had no accounting for. She’d been to the Prom with Alex Patterson and had been crowned Homecoming Princess in front of a roomful of gawking teenagers. However, even those experiences had not prepared her for the level of scrutiny that slithered their way when they stepped out of the main church into the lobby together. On that top step, it was like they were making a statement, a statement Sage desperately wanted to make with him but one she still wasn’t sure she should let him make with her.

“Come on,” Luke said, clearly not feeling the gravity of the situation like she did. And then as if he had completely lost his mind, he took her hand. Right there in front of everyone.

In fact, Sage felt the gasp of judgment and astonishment that washed across the room. How he did not, she would never know. Getting her feet to cooperate and not pitch her down the last two brick stairs was challenging her balancing abilities and sanity.

Everyone was now looking at them. Right at them. She couldn’t breathe. She was going to pass out. And then Luke was headed toward the pastor and Mrs. Mitchell who were standing over by the fireplace. Why did he not stop? Why did he not realize this was a very bad idea?

“Morning, Pastor, Mrs. Mitchell.” Luke used his free hand to shake theirs.

“Morning, Luke. Sage,” Pastor Steve said, and his smile almost seemed genuine. “We’re so glad you could both join us this morning.” He turned to Sage. “We missed you at the community meal yesterday.”

“Oh.” Her eyes went wide in the panic. The lie was right there. “I’m sorry.”

However, his smile softened. “No need to be sorry. Just know that you’re always welcome.”

Sage nodded as if she had forgotten how. “Oh. Okay.”

“Excuse us,” Luke said, nodding to them.

“Certainly.”

He loved having her near him, and Luke was finding it imminently amusing how closely she shadowed his every move. “Let’s go make sure you can come.”

“Okay.” She looked stricken with a bad case of the nerves.

“Mom,” he said, ducking closer to his mother’s shoulder. “Did you talk to them?”

His mother turned, and he hoped Sage didn’t see the fading of her smile or the look as her eyes asked him if this was a good idea. However, Luke was not backing down. Finally his mother acquiesced. “I’ll go talk with Emily.”

“We’ll go with you.”

Sage seriously wanted to argue or to disappear. Back across the lobby they went. If he was trying to make a point that they were together, it was clearly working. Halfway across, she caught the disapproving look of one of the older ladies. The woman corkscrewed her mouth and shook her head. Sage wanted to abandon this whole crazy idea, but her hand was in his, and he wasn’t letting go or stopping.

As they approached her stepmother, Sage began to get lightheaded. They couldn’t be doing this, shouldn’t be doing this. It was hopeless, pointless. Her stepmother would never let her go. Not to Luke’s. Not with his parents. And she might very well make a scene right here just to make a point.

“Hi, Em.” Luke’s mother embraced Emily, and Sage knew she was done. They were done. No way would her stepmother submit her friendship to the threat of what her stepdaughter could do to it.

“Oh, hi, Felicia,” Emily said, tipping her head to indicate she knew something was up and she probably was not going to like it. “What’s going on?”

“We were wondering,” Felicia said, looking at the two of them, “if Sage might be able to join us for lunch at my mom and dad’s today.”

“Oh.” Emily let out a sad breath. “I don’t…”

At that moment, Mr. Lawrence remarkably appeared just behind his wife and put his hands on her shoulders. She swiveled around in surprise. He smiled at the group, a smile that dragged Sage’s gaze to the ground. It was always so hard to be around him.

“Hello, Felicia,” he said.

“Greg,” she said in return. Then she looked over at Luke who widened his eyes as if to say Go on. Say it. She licked her lips and started again, this time directing the question to Sage’s dad rather than her stepmother. “We were wondering if Sage could come with us to my parents’ house for the afternoon.”

“Oh.” Her father glanced down at her stepmom. “I don’t see why not. We’re not doing anything this afternoon, are we?”

“Oh. Uh. No,” her stepmother finally ground out. “We’re not doing anything special.”

“Great,” Felicia said.

Luke wanted to shout his luck to the world as he exited the church with Sage right there beside him. They went to his car, and he helped her in. Running around, he waved to the Lawrence clan but only Mr. Lawrence waved back. Once in the car, he looked over at Sage. “Whew.”

She looked at him and raised her eyebrows. “No kidding. You have got to be insane.”

“What? Why’s that?”

“Asking my parents right there in front of God and everybody? Are you crazy?”

“Yeah.” And he grinned at her. “About you. Does it show?”

Sage shook her head as he started the car and backed out. “You know they are plotting about how to get me on that plane.”

His gaze turned serious. “Did they tell you yet?”

“No. I think they’re afraid I might run away.”

Reaching over he took her hand. “That could be arranged.”

“What has gotten into you today?”

“Well, I’ve heard that love can make you do some crazy things. Maybe that’s it.”

Her cheeks tinted pink.

“Now listen,” he said as serious returned, “you should know, Hannah’s going to be there today and Priscilla.”

“Hannah?” There was that light-headed thing again. What if Hannah hated her? She held such a sway with her brother. Two sisters, parents, and grandparents? How had she gotten talked into this?

“Hannah’s cool. Just don’t say she looks like me and she’ll love you as much as I do.” He lifted her hand in his and kissed it. “Promise.”

Okay, she wanted to believe him, but when they got to his grandparents’ house, a small farmhouse so far from civilization there wasn’t another house to even be seen, Sage began to seriously doubt the intelligence of this outing. “Are you sure about this?”

“Eh. They’re cool.” He got out of the car, swiped off his jacket and the tie and pitched both of them without ceremony into the front seat.

From her vantage point, Sage watched him unbutton the top button and the sleeve buttons before rolling them up. Could he just not look so handsome standing in the sunlight like that? Really. It was doing very bad things to her insides, things she was pretty sure you were not supposed to be thinking and feeling when sitting in grandparents’ driveways.

At that moment a small black car pulled in and came right alongside of them on her side of the car. Luke grinned. “Well, look who showed up.” He waved and shut his door, coming around the car.

Where had all the air on the planet gone? It couldn’t have disappeared that quickly, could it? Next to the other car, Luke slid around the open door to the young lady standing. He threw his arms around her and gave her a monster hug before straightening.

Sage could almost hear him say, “Hey, there’s someone I want you to meet.”

If the planet had pitched her off of it, she wouldn’t have been at all surprised. And then somehow he was standing there with her door open, offering his hand. She glanced at him warily, but he grinned that sideways thing he always did.

“Come on. Hannah’s only bitten me once, and that was because I flushed her favorite toy down the toilet.”

Sage let out on the small laugh as Hannah hit his elbow and barely got her breathing going again as she put her hand in his.

“You seriously deserved that one,” Hannah said. “Poor little scooter baby.”

Careful to bring her mask with her, Sage got out of the car, coming to a standstill with the car door and him behind her and Hannah in front of her.

Hannah was small, much smaller than Priscilla. Younger too. With longish brown hair and a nose that looked like a smaller copy of Luke’s. She put out her hand, professional but incredibly friendly. “I’m Hannah, and whatever he’s told you about me is a total lie.”

“Oh. I’m Sage.” Sage giggled softly. “It’s all been good. I promise.” The two of them shook hands as Luke made room to shut the door. At that, the three of them headed to the back door. It was so strange out here how everyone used the back door rather than the front.

Back home that would have had people calling the police.

“So Sage, Luke says you’re here for the summer,” Hannah said, opening the door to let them pass, but only Sage went in. Luke stopped to hold the door for both of them.

That left Sage leading, Hannah behind her, and Luke feeling like he was a million miles away from her. Her courage began to threaten mutiny. However, together the three of them tracked through the back room and into the kitchen. The layout was quite similar to her parents’ house, and she wondered if all houses here were like that.

Then miraculously, he was right by her side again along with the feeling she was beginning to really like.

“I am. Only a little while longer though.”

“I guess out here is way different, huh?”

Content to follow them even as he waved to his mother, Luke did so, shadowing Sage lest any bad thing get near enough to threaten damage. Somehow she had gotten more beautiful on the ride over. Maybe that was because they were now in the comfortable environs he had grown up in. He’d always seen them one way, but he had the feeling from this point forward he would never see them that way again.

They continued to talk on into the living room where his father and grandfather were watching the game.

“Oh, baseball,” Sage said over the familiar sounds.

“The Sox,” Hannah said, rolling her eyes and sitting down on the couch. “If they have baseball in Heaven, you’ll never see these people for a whole eternity.”

Sage smiled but didn’t laugh, and Luke could feel her trepidation holding her spirit in check as she sat down next to him. Right or wrong, he put his arm around her and gathered her closer, absolutely loving how right that felt. He didn’t miss the fraction of an inch Hannah’s eyebrow went up when he did that, but she smiled so he knew she wasn’t going to say anything.

“And you’re from California?” Hannah asked.

“Yes.”

The meal was wonderful as usual. Although Luke tried to include her as much as possible, he noticed how quiet Sage was. It was as if she was feeling them out, figuring out how to fit in or if she did. Long about the time the chocolate pie was served, he hit on something that might draw her out of her shell.

“Hey, Hannah-banana, did Mom tell you she’s going to repaint your room?” he asked, slicing into his pie, and Sage’s gaze turned to his with wide-eyed panic. That’s when he realized so had everyone else’s. He shrugged. “What? Isn’t that what you said the other night?”

“I… well… uh…” his mother stuttered.

“Well, hallelujah! It’s about time!” Hannah said in relief. “I have lived with that awful pink thing forever.”

“Awful?” her mother asked in concern and disbelief.

“Yes, horrible. Have you seen that paint?”

“I thought you liked that paint.”

“Pepto-Bismal pink? Who would like that?”

“But you never said anything.”

“I was afraid you’d take me shopping for a new bedspread.”

Priscilla laughed. “That is a fate worse than death.” She shook her head. “Hannah and shopping. No. Never, ever a good idea.”

Their mother leaned on the table to look at her youngest daughter. “Are you serious, you don’t like that color?”

“Mom, it’s me. Me and pink? When have I ever liked pink?”

As they talked, Sage watched them. They didn’t yell, didn’t even really raise their voices past amusement and chagrin. No one was saying the other was an idiot or why could they never do anything right.

“She’s got a point,” Priscilla said. “I don’t think she owns a single thing that’s pink.”

“I don’t,” Hannah said, “and there’s a reason for that.”

“You’re serious?” Their mother shook her head again. “Then why did we do your room in pink?”

Hannah shrugged. “Because Kara wanted it pink.”

“Our room is green,” Priscilla said as if green was akin to the black hole.

“Right,” Hannah said. “Your room was green. Kara wanted pink, so she talked Mom into painting mine and Maddie’s room pink because Mom wouldn’t repaint your room.”

Priscilla lowered her fork. “You remember this?”

Hannah shrugged. “When you’re the youngest, you learn to pick your battles.”

“Amen to that,” Luke said, forking another bite into his mouth.

Sage was becoming as amused as fascinated. She had never before watched a family like this one unless they were on TV or in a movie.

“So you’ve got a pink room that you don’t want,” their mother said, “and you don’t like the green, Priscilla?”

“Neither does Kara.”

Felicia threw up her hands. “Then why are those rooms that color?”

Both girls shrugged.

“I don’t believe this. I didn’t want to repaint them because I didn’t want to upset you all, and here nobody liked them the color they were.”

“Luke liked his room,” Hannah offered.

“My room is brown. Brown is good. It looks like chocolate and never gets dirty,” Luke said.

“Have you seen your room?” Priscilla asked. “They would send the hazmat team in from the Pentagon, but they’d be afraid the poor guys would never make it out again.”

“It is not that bad.” He grinned. “Okay, it used to be that bad, but you’d be impressed now.”

“No pizza under the bed?”

“Only one slice.”

She exhaled and shook her head.

“What? I have to have something for when I’m studying at midnight.”

“You? Studying?” Hannah asked. “That I’d pay to see.”

It was truly amazing how they were together. Sage had always thought of having siblings as the worst nightmare. Then she got two, and although one was sweet to her, the other one made her realize why she was glad she’d never had them. Now, however, watching them discuss new room colors and growing up in their house, a pang of longing touched her heart. What it must be like to fit like that.

They were lucky. She wondered if they knew just how much.

In minutes the pie was gone, and his grandmother stood to collect the dishes. Just like that Sage was on her feet.

“Oh, Mrs. Cameron, please. You cooked. We can clean.”

Why every single person looked up and at her, Sage couldn’t at all tell. Her eyes went wide as she looked around at them.

“Can’t we?” she finally asked as if somehow she had somehow inadvertently smashed a secret code of tradition or something.

And then, suddenly everyone was moving, grabbing up dishes and glasses and pans.

“The meal was wonderful,” Luke’s grandfather said. “The cooks are to be commended.”

Feeling like she had likely made a major faux pas, Sage took her handful of dishes to the sink where everyone was crowding around.

“Oh, here, Sage,” Hannah said, reaching for the plates. “You don’t have to do that.”

Sage smiled softly. “It’s okay. I’ve kind of gotten used to it.”

“Yeah, Sage helps us out with the community meal,” Luke said, swaggering up beside her.

“The community meal?” Priscilla said as she tilted her head. “For the disadvantaged?”

“That’s the one.” He set his dishes next to the sink were Hannah had set up shop.

“You still do that?”

“Every other week.” He went back for more from the table. “’Bout had a major disaster this week though.”

“Oh, how’s that?” Priscilla asked, and as Sage gathered the potato pan and the corn bowl, her attention attached to the conversation. Disaster? She hadn’t heard about any disaster.

“Yeah, the fridge went out in the center. The little one, not the walk-in thank goodness, but all the meat was in there.” Shaking his head, he put the rest of the dishes he was carrying on the counter and then came for Sage’s. His wink and half grin about did her heart in. “Pastor Steve tried to fix it, but I think it’s officially done for.”

“That’s too bad,” his mother said. “That’s such a great cause. Maybe some of us could chip in and get a new one.”

“Or a new used one,” Hannah offered. “They have some down at the warehouse. Don’t know how expensive they are or anything.”

Without being asked, Sage went to the other side and grabbed a dish towel. Hannah and Priscilla were already down to the pans as all the dishes were in the washer.

“Oh, Sage,” Priscilla said. “Let Luke do that. You’re a guest.”

However, Sage wasn’t about to not be a part of this. “The table needs washed. Luke can do that.”

“Sounds like you’ve got marching orders, Little Bro,” Hannah said and handed him a wet dishcloth.

“When have I ever not had marching orders?” However, when he looked at Sage, it was clear he was not unhappy about the situation. “Besides, doing dishes is dangerous.”

Priscilla leaned over to Sage. “Don’t let him fool you. He is not allergic to doing dishes.”

Luke started laughing at that. “I had forgotten about that. Achoo!”

“Mom!” Priscilla said. “Luke is trying to get out of dishes again!”

“There are some perks to being the youngest.”

“Yes, and you found and exploited every single one of them.”

“You’re right about that,” he said, coming between them to shake out the dishrag. “I’m not stupid.”

No, Sage thought as she watched him turn, her whole concentration on him. He was not stupid. Far from it. But she was also realizing how very little she really knew about him, and in that moment, she determined that before she left for California, she was going to do some hardcore Luke Baker research.

When they left at six-thirty, the others all gave Sage a hug, and it was hard not to let their love and graciousness touch her heart. It hurt to remember that she would never be back in this kitchen, with them, just doing dishes and laughing about old times. They weren’t her old times, but she loved hearing about them just the same. Like when Luke climbed up on the roof because his sisters were babysitting and he got mad at them. Or the time Hannah and Luke were found playing in the mud hole. Or when Luke fell asleep on the school bus, and nobody noticed he was missing until he woke up back at the school.

Yes, she loved the old stories, and as they headed out, she was determined to hear more of them. Only now from him rather than his family.

At the car, he went to her side and helped her in, and she couldn’t help but smile at the figure he cut crossing in front of the car, still in that white buttoned down but totally casual in how he wore it. He got in, and Sage couldn’t hold all she was feeling inside. Just as he went to start the car, he caught her gaze.

“What?” he asked as if he was worried.

She eyed him as she shook her head. “You.”

Luke raised his eyebrows at her. “That don’t sound good.”

“No, it is.”

“Uh, huh. Okay.” He started the car. “Mind tellin’ me what’s going through that pretty little head of yours?”

True contemplation took over her being. “I will if you’ll stop on the hill.”

“The hill?” He glanced over at her. “From the other night?”

“Yeah. I think the sunset’s probably amazing from there.”

Like he wasn’t sure he trusted her, Luke looked over and then rescued her hand from her lap. “It is that.”

When they were parked on the hill, Luke had just enough presence of mind to retrieve the old blanket from his trunk. It was there in case he ever had car trouble in bad weather, and it wasn’t exactly in mint condition, but it was better than making her sit on the dirty hood. He worked to get the thing spread out and stable before helping her up onto it. That took more work than he had anticipated, but he knew it would be more than worth it.

Finally, leaning back on the windshield, he collected her to him, and he had to admit, she was going to be right about that sunset.

“So,” she said softly after a minute. “Luke Baker, who are you?”

That dragged his gaze down to her and fastened it there. “Who am I?”

“Yeah.” Sage tipped her head to be able to see up into his eyes as her fingers played tag with the top button he hadn’t undone. “Who are you? What is it about you… every time I’m around you, I just feel this… like you care so much, like you’ll do anything for anybody, and yet, you come off like this spontaneous guy who floats through life without really thinking you’re doing anything special.”

The assessment was a bit overwhelming, and Luke shrugged it off. “I don’t know. I just, I guess I figure I’ll do what I can to help. Not that it’s all that glamorous or exciting or anything.”

“That’s what I mean. It’s like you’re all substance, no show.”

His eyebrows nearly went off the top of his head he raised them so high. “And that’s a good thing?”

Sage’s face fell into seriousness. “Yes, it’s a good thing. What? You don’t think it is?”

He shrugged again. “Most people don’t think so.”

“Most people… who? Everybody thinks you’re incredible.”

That was worse and he scrunched his face. “Nobody thinks that.”

She shook her head in disbelief. “Are you kidding me? Your parents, my parents, your sisters, Pastor Steve, Ms. P…”

However, he wasn’t buying it. “That’s just ‘cause I do stuff.”

Frustration was beginning to creep onto her lovely face. “You do stuff? Yeah. You do stuff that nobody else will do, and you do it as if it’s no big deal.”

“It isn’t.”

“Yes.” This time she came up on her elbow and smacked his chest. “It is.” Now she was hovering over him, her hair glinting in the fading sunlight. “You are completely amazing, and I can’t for the life of me figure out why you can’t see that.”

Luke looked at her, studying her, wondering at the thoughts sifting through him. Then, gently, he pulled her down into his arms before exhaling. “I’m just a guy. I’m nothing really special. I don’t play sports. I don’t sing in the choir. I don’t even read all that great. I’m just me, and…” He shrugged as the feelings of worthlessness surfaced in his heart. He shook his head. “The truth is, I don’t even know if I’m going to make it into college.”

It was the first time he had ever admitted that even to himself.

“I don’t really have the grades for it. I’m a solid C-student, and thinking about four more years of school…” The sigh went all the way through him. “I don’t know. Maybe this is all I’m ever going to be, a handy guy who’s good with a hammer and some nails.”

Once again, she twisted so she could see him. “But you’re so much more than that.”

The black hole of his inadequacy opened up in his heart, dragging him down into it. “It would sure be nice to believe that.”

Sage exhaled as she looked at him. “Then maybe I’m going to have to show you.”

“Oh, yeah? And how do you plan to do that?”

It was a good question, but Sage felt the deep need to do it sink into her just the same. However, the calendar stared back at her, telling her she was running out of time. “Do you think about Wednesday? What it’s going to be like when I go home?”

His gaze swept out to the horizon beyond. “I’m trying not to.”

But she couldn’t let that go, couldn’t let him go so easily. “I don’t want you to ever think this was just some summer thing, that I was just using you ‘til I could go home.”

Luke said nothing, and after a minute, Sage picked herself up again.

“I’m serious.” Her eyes drilled into him, willing him to hear what she was saying because she never wanted him to think otherwise. “I think you are so crazy incredible, and I can’t imagine life without you. I mean, I’ve gone out with a lot of guys. Most of them I’m ready to dump by the time the appetizer is on the table. But you… I can’t figure out how it is that you make me want to be… better, to love, to help, to just let go and not care what everyone else thinks or says.”

Her eyes searched his. “Like this morning at church. It was like you didn’t care who saw us together, like you didn’t care what they thought.”

“What they thought was, ‘How’d that poor schlub get so lucky to be standing by her?’”

“They did not!”

He laughed. “They did too.”

“No.” Sage knew he was wrong. “They were thinking what in the world is he going out with someone like her for?” She lay down on his chest, liking the sound of his heartbeat and the feel of his thumb rubbing up and down her back slowly.

“Well, if they were thinking that, they were completely wrong.” He resettled on the car. “Sometimes I can’t figure it out, you know?”

“What’s that?”

“This. Why you’re here, with me.”

“Because, I’ve never felt this safe and this loved with anyone else in my whole life.” She tightened her grip on him. “You give without asking for anything in return. You show up and you make the bad stuff go away. No one’s ever done that for me before. I don’t want Wednesday to come.”

He hugged her to him. “Neither do I.”

Back at her house, Luke held her hand from the car to the back door. Sage never wanted to let him go. At the step he stopped and gathered her in. The white shirt was no longer pressed, but she didn’t care. Clothes, cars, image, none of that mattered anymore. She was losing him, and that’s all her heart could think.

He breathed her in as he held her. “Can I come see you tomorrow?”

Sage sniffed back the growing well of emotions. “You better.”

“K. I’ll be here.” Carefully he tipped her chin up in his fingers. “I promise.”

“Well, it’s about time you get here,” Emily said when Sage made it into the kitchen. Why did that light always have to be so bright?

“It’s only ten.”

“Well, we’ve been waiting all day. Hang on.” She went into the living room. “Greg, Sage is here.”

Greg, Sage is here? This was not going to be good. Sage picked her hand up to her opposite elbow, suddenly feeling a chill go through the room and down her spirit.

“Yes.” Her stepmother came back. She looked at Sage. “You should come. Sit. Your father has something he wants to tell you.”

Sage knew what that something was. She was already preparing her heart for the blow. Across the room, her father came in, and when he looked at her, his smile was soft and sad. Feeling the weight of every step she took, she crossed over to the table where Emily stood like the Cheshire Cat trying to hide its smile. Why did she have to look so very pleased about Sage’s coming banishment?

“Sit, please,” her father said, indicating the chairs with an upturned hand.

If Sage had had just a little more moxie, she would have made him do this standing up, but as it was, her knees might give out at any time. So she sat, slowly, carefully, on the edge of the chair, taking a small breath and praying it wouldn’t bring up the tears.

“Sage,” her father said, and the melancholy from his smile was evident in his eyes, “I know being here hasn’t been easy for you.”

Don’t shift. Don’t fidget. Don’t swallow. Sit still. Stay very, very still.

“I really wanted this to work when we offered to take you for the summer.”

Don’t move. Don’t breathe too hard. Don’t react.

“It’s not that we don’t want you here. It’s just that… Well, I think you can see this isn’t working out like we thought it would.”

Chin up. No tears, Sage. Do not even think about crying.

“Emily and I have discussed it, and we’ve talked it over with your mom.”

Sage, hold it together. Hold. It. Together. No emotions. Be strong.

His gaze jumped over to Emily’s before he continued, and it clearly took him effort to gather the words. “I’ve booked a plane ticket for you on Wednesday morning.”

Blink. Blink slowly. Do not cry. Do. Not. Cry.

“The plane leaves here at eight in the morning, and you’ll get back to L.A. late that evening.”

She wanted to nod, but any movement was going to throw her into a fit on the floor.

“I hope you understand that we really wanted this to work, but we think in the best interests of all of us.”

Us. She was sure she was not included in that calculation. The blink and the swallow did nothing to get her voice stable. “Who will I…” She had to clear her throat, and she hated herself for being so weak. “Who will I stay with when I get there?”

Once again, his gaze went to his wife’s. “Your mother said there are friends who could check in on you if you needed anything.” His gaze came straggling up to hers. “You’re almost 18 now, so we figured it wouldn’t hurt for you to be there for a while by yourself.”

By yourself. Wow. Did she feel those words all the way into the softest middle of her heart. Finally getting herself to nod, she tried to get her gaze to stay on his, but it didn’t. Instead it bounced around even as she fought to get it to stop and hold steady. “Okay.”

“You know, we really wanted this to work….”

Now she was nodding, praying she wouldn’t start crying, knowing she was about to and having no way to stop it. “I know. It’s my fault, and I’m sorry.” She said the last two words to Emily, and then desperately fighting not to let her face crumple, she brought her gaze back to her father’s. “May I go now? I have some packing to do.”

A moment and he nodded.

Gathering up all of her courage and what little dignity she had left, Sage stood, lifted her chin, and battled not to let her eyes fall closed as she exited the room.

“I don’t know, Em,” her father said. “Maybe…”

“It’s an act, Greg. She’s good at it. Trust me. It’s all just one big act.”

How she was even able to breathe when she got into her room with the door closed, Sage had no idea. The tears didn’t come gently, peacefully sliding down her cheeks like they normally did. Instead, they pitched her onto the bed and wrenched across her like the ferocity of a black storm at sea.

She had known this was coming, thought she was braced for it, thought she had already accepted it. It wasn’t like she didn’t know, and still, the lashing of the emotions set so hard on her spirit that thinking straight was impossible. Her heart heaved and pitched and constricted, hurling her into a pit of pain she would never have thought possible.

Back home. L.A. Beverly Hills. Never had she hated them more.

How was she ever going to stuff herself back into that mold? How was she ever going to become Sage Hollywood again? It felt more impossible than it ever had.

On the desk her phone buzzed, and drawing herself upward, she reached for it. It was Luke. Who else would it be?

I love you was all he had written.

Sage shook her head and through the onrush of tears, she typed her reply.

I love you too.

The suitcases were scattered about the small room the next morning. Monday. Forty-eight hours at the most and she would be sprung from this small dungeon. She should be happy, Sage told herself. This was what she had so desperately wanted.

And three weeks alone at the mansion? What teenager in their right mind wouldn’t kill for a set up like that? She should really text Mac and Patelyn, tell them the deets, and have them set something up for Friday. Her heart bounced back and forth from the bonfire here to the fabulous party they would have there. The best clothes, catered of course, maybe Alex would show up. Her heart panged at that thought, but she beat it down. She was going home.

She might as well figure out how to live with that because getting hysterical about it wasn’t going to fix anything. Carefully, one-by-one she took the makeup containers off the little desk, purposely ignoring the mirror. If she could somehow do this, just stay outside of herself, not really think about what she was doing, numb herself to the movement and the memories, then she could get through it, and in no time she was sure she would be on that plane headed back to the life she was destined to live.

It was, she told herself over and over. This life was a fantasy, an illusion. She wasn’t this person. She wasn’t someone who cared about things like family and bonfires. She wasn’t this person who wore her hair natural to church and kind of liked it that way. No. This person was a ghost, an illusion that never really was and needed to disappear and never bother her again.

Sniffing, she folded the navy top and the white jeans. The heels and the lesson of not wearing them on gravel sliced into her well-staged act. Sage shook her head at the vision of Luke in that ditch over Rory, and her heart whispered that it hoped he would get busy today and not come. If he would just stay away, she could do this without making a scene. However, every thought of him jerked her emotions loose, and the harder she tried to put them back in their little cages, the more they refused to cooperate.

She closed her eyes, willing them all down as she sniffed again. “Don’t think about that, Sage. Don’t. It won’t do any good to be a crybaby about this. You know better than that.”

But knowing and doing were about as far apart in her soul as they had ever been.

All morning Luke had thought about her, about her coming departure. He had gone over and over and over it so many times in his mind that by the time he crossed through town at noon, he could hardly make sense of any of it. He didn’t want her to go. She didn’t want to go. Those two things he knew for certain. As for the rest of it…

He drove by the pastor’s house, and his gaze slipped over to it. The car was there. Blinking, he breathed down the crazy thought of stopping. The pastor would think he’d lost his mind. Then again, they did need to talk about that broken fridge. And the sooner the better too, so they could get it fixed or get a new one. Convincing himself that that was why he was turning around, he did a U-turn in the middle of the street and headed back to the little enclave set back in the trees.

It was astonishingly simply to tell himself that he was only going to talk about the fridge. All the way up to the doorbell and pushing it that lie worked. Only when Mrs. Mitchell appeared did he question if he could lie long enough to get back out of here without mentioning that his heart was ripping in two and he was about to bleed to death.

“Luke?” she asked in surprise. “We weren’t expecting you. Come on in.”

“Yeah.” He put one thumb up to his eyebrow and scratched there. “I’m sorry for just dropping in like this. I thought maybe we should figure out what we’re doing with that busted fridge.”

“Oh, of course. Steve is in here.” She led him to the little office. “Steve, Luke’s here.”

He wished she would tell him why so that he didn’t have to lie to the pastor. This was not a good idea. Lying to the pastor? Didn’t they send people straight to hell for something like that?

“Luke.” Pastor Steve stood and offered his hand. “Please have a seat.”

When they were both down, Pastor Steve folded his hands on the little desk, but instead of saying anything, he just waited. That threw Luke into the dark side of the pit, and he couldn’t figure out which way was out.

“Uh.” He bent and scratched his eyebrow again. Lifting himself on his elbows and shifting in the chair, he glanced up, thought better of that, and shook his head. “I’m sorry for showing up… like this. I was driving by, and…”

The pastor’s eyes were soft and knowing.

“I… um…” Yes. This was a bad idea, a horrible idea, a horrible, horrible, very bad idea. Why did he suddenly feel like he wanted to cry? What was that? He was a guy. He didn’t cry. The fridge. The fridge! His mind was yelling at him to say something about the fridge. This was business, not personal. Start there and keep it there.

“Let me guess.” Pastor Steve stood, went to the door, and shut it. “They haven’t changed their minds.”

Luke blinked up at him. About the fridge? Now his thoughts were swirling like a Cat-5 hurricane, lashing the boarded up windows of his soul until he knew it was about to collapse the entire structure.

“Sage is leaving?” Pastor Steve sat in the chair next to Luke rather than the one across the desk.

After a second, Luke nodded. He squeezed his eyes closed as the pain slashed into him. “And it’s killing me.”

“I can see that.”

Then he gave up pretending this had anything to do with the stupid fridge. “I can’t for the life of me understand it. She’s so great, and they’re just tossing her out like yesterday’s garbage.” Luke reshifted himself in the chair. “Nobody’s even going to be there when she gets home. Her folks are still out on their little adventure in Europe, and she’s going to be sitting there all alone for like three weeks.”

“And you’re worried for her safety?”

“That’s part of it.”

“What’s the other part?”

“That she’s going to leave believing she doesn’t deserve good, that nobody wants her, that she’s not good enough for anybody to love her or want her around.” He looked right at the pastor. “She really believes that, you know? She really thinks that she deserves jerks pawing her and treating her like trash. She is not trash!” The words lifted him right out of the chair, and he took a step toward the window and dug his fingers into his hair. “They’re wrong about that, about her. All of them are. But it’s like they are so dead-set on judging her or being jealous of her that they don’t even bother to see her as a real person.”

He turned, angry at the world and willing to take it out on whoever happened to be there. “What kind of a man would do that to his daughter? I don’t get it.” Luke shook his head. “I always admired him. Mr. Lawrence. But it’s like he’s willing to throw her into the volcano to appease the gods or something. She does not deserve to be pitched into this hell. She doesn’t.”

The pastor’s eyes never moved from soft. “Have you told him this? Have you talked to him about it?”

That deflated Luke, and he collapsed into the chair. “No.” He shrugged slightly. “I don’t think it would do any good.”

“Why not?”

“Because. It’s like he doesn’t even want to be around her. He’s her father in name only, if that.”

Pastor Steve nodded. “And what does a real father look like in this situation?”

“Well, he definitely doesn’t do what’s easiest for him if that’s going to cause his child pain. He gets in the middle of things, and he fights death itself to keep it away from his child.” Then he lifted his gaze. “I’ve seen my dad with my sisters. They don’t always see eye-to-eye on stuff, but they know he’s on their side. They know if worst comes to worst, Dad’s going to be there to give them a hug or just be a shoulder to cry on. He’s got their back and their best interests at heart even if they don’t always agree on what that means.” His thoughts were slowing down now. “Sage doesn’t have that. I don’t think she ever has.

“She told me, about her family in California, and there’s no connection there, no sense that they’re ever there for her. She’s like this doll.” And then, he began to see it. “This perfect, flawless object, who’s not allowed to have feelings or to want anything more than this month’s newest shoe style. She doesn’t talk about her dad from back home much, but when she does, it’s like she’s trying not to mess anything up, trying not to get in the way, trying not to need him or anybody else.

“I think she’s convinced herself that needing somebody is a bad thing, that wanting to be a part of a family who loves you is not real or not something she deserves.” He shook his head. “I don’t know. The more I think about it, the more I think it goes back to her dads and how completely cut off they’ve been with her. But how do you reconnect with someone who doesn’t want to be connected to you? How do you get them to see that they’re killing you?”

Once again, he was on his feet and walking slowly to the window where he looked out. “If you would see her when she’s trying to be who I think she really is… It’s so hard to watch because she’s that person and then she yanks herself back, and then she dips a toe in the water and then runs back away from it. She can’t just be who she is. They won’t let her. Trying to be who she is not is killing her, and it’s killing me to watch it and not be able to do anything to fix any of it. And now, she’s going back to California, and I’m probably never going to see her again, and how in the world is that right? Why would God put us together so that we make this incredible connection only to yank us apart and put 3,000 miles between us? How does that many any sense?”

Coming back, Luke sat down in a heap. “Sometimes I think this is just not a fight I can even hope to win, so why even fight it? Just do like everybody else does, have a few laughs and some fun, and then let go and go on with life as if it never happened.” Even saying it felt impossible.

“Or…” the pastor said slowly, and Luke’s gaze jumped up to him. He hadn’t realized there was an or.

“Or?” he asked in confusion.

Pastor Steve tilted his head. “Let me ask you this. Do you really think God does things randomly, for no reason at all?”

Luke was so tired he didn’t know what to think.

“Do you think God has no plan for Sage or for you for that matter? Do you think He’s just sitting up there watching all this drama before shutting off His TV to go to bed?”

“Maybe. I don’t know what I think anymore.”

“Well, I’ll tell you what I think. I think that God has a very definite reason for bringing the two of you together, and I don’t think it has anything to do with just giving you something to do this summer. I think He’s working things out for the good of everyone in this situation.”

“By sending her back to California? I don’t see how that’s going to help.”

“Maybe He’s not sending her back. Maybe He’s asking you to get proactive here and do something to stand up for her.”

Bending forward, Luke laced his fingers and looked only at them. “I don’t know if you’ve noticed this, but I’m not exactly the knight in shining armor type, Pastor. I wouldn’t even know how to do that.”

“Yes you do.”

When Luke looked up, the pastor nodded.

“You do. It’s just terrifying to think about loving someone enough to take the battle to the enemy on their behalf.”

“Talking to her dad?” It came out as a question. “That’s what you mean, isn’t it? Talking to her dad.”

Slowly the pastor nodded. “And not just about California, but about what he’s doing to her.”

The sigh pulled Luke up and out of the chair again, but this time it was with very little energy. “I wouldn’t even know what to say to him.”

“Then say what you’ve told me. That you don’t want her to go, and she doesn’t want to go.”

“He knows that.”

“Does he?”

Luke considered that and while one part of him was saying yes, how could he possibly not know, the other part was admitting they’d never really talked about it. “I just don’t think we could talk with Mrs. Lawrence right there.”

“Then maybe you try talking where she isn’t.” The pastor’s gaze grew more serious. “Has Sage talked with him about how she feels?”

Terror seized him. “With her dad? Uh, no. When he’s around, she shuts down completely.” And there was just enough pause for him to hear those words.

“Sometimes when we feel we are not being heard, we stop talking.” Pastor Steve exhaled slowly. “Sage strikes me as a young woman who has been told that feeling is a bad thing, so she doesn’t. I’ve seen her in church, sitting there with her family. Dad’s right next to her with the Gulf of Mexico between them. Jaycee’s on the other side with the Grand Canyon between them. It’s like she’s one of them but separate, and she knows it.”

Luke nodded. “She does.” He shrugged. “She is.”

“I wish there were words to give you that would wave a magic wand over all this and make it better. I don’t have them. What I can tell you is that God is definitely here. He is working in your heart. He’s working in Sage’s heart. If you ask Him, He can do miraculous things that you can’t think or imagine. But you’re going to have to be willing to get out of this boat and out onto those waves because you can’t fix this thing on your own. You need His help.”

Of that and no more, Luke was one-hundred percent sure.

Chapter 25

All day long Sage had rehearsed what she would say and how she would say it when he showed up. He was going to show up. Sooner or later he would. How she would ever hold herself together when he did was less than certain.

She was working to get the sewing stuff back in the closet when she heard his voice in the kitchen talking to Jaycee. Even that much brought up the flood of tears, and she beat it back as she stuffed and held and stuffed some more. “Stop it, Sage. Just stop it. Don’t ruin the time you have left with him.”

“Knock. Knock.” And suddenly he was standing there at her door, jeans, blue T-shirt, that smile.

Sage was in the corner, fighting with the sewing machine when Luke found her, his heart on his sleeve as he fought the wind and the waves threatening from every side. He’d even been unfortunate enough to meet up with Jaycee in the kitchen. Just what he needed to convince him this whole thing was a very bad idea.

“Oh, hey,” Sage said with that bright, syrupy voice stunning him to the core. She smiled and shook her head as she rolled her eyes. “Of course this wouldn’t fit again. Is anybody surprised?”

He let go of the doorframe and came all the way into the room. That’s when he noticed the suitcases stacked neatly at the edge of the bed, and his heart sank. “You need help?”

She angled damsel in distress eyes up at him. “As usual, right?” Her giggle didn’t help.

Not happy at all with the turn in her mood, he took the thing from her and went to work, picking up the stuff that had fallen down in its place.

“Yeah, just right there,” she said, and that voice was threatening his sanity. “Second shelf. I should have looked how to stack the stuff before I took it out, you know? But what do you expect? Me being Brilliant Sage as usual.”

With a scowl, Luke glanced back at her, and she seemed to shrink behind her arms that were twined in the middle of her.

“Oh. Do you want me to help? I can help.” Surging forward, she tried to angle herself into a position to hold the avalanching stuff up. However, with the small end table right there, it wasn’t working at all. “Here.” Carefully sliding under his arms, she twined herself under and around him to push the stuff back up. “There. I think you can get it now.”

With the last molecule of control left in him, Luke finally got the sewing machine back in its rightful place.

“There,” Sage said brightly.

As he backed up and watched her, she took hold of both folding doors and forced them into place with a tug and a shove. A second when the task was done, and she turned to him.

Sage could hardly breathe he was standing so close, but she forced the smile onto her face and refused to let it fall. “Thanks. I didn’t know how I was ever going to get that thing back in there.” Going over to the suitcases, she folded the piece of clothing on the bed. “It’s crazy that it’s this hard, you know? I mean everything fit in here the first time. Why should it be so hard to get it all back in, right?”

If she just kept talking, kept the mask on, kept him from knowing…

“Sage,” he said, and she felt his presence mesh with hers as he stepped up right behind her.

“It’s just I can’t believe how much stuff I brought, you know? I mean, come on. Who needs this many clothes?”

“Come here,” he said gently, and the mask jerked painfully as he put his strong, firm, warm hands on both of her arms to turn her toward him.

In the next breath she was looking up into his eyes, and sheer panic split through her. “I… Um… I’m….”

But he didn’t give her a chance to say that. One heartbeat and he pulled her into his arms. Her restraint faltered, and she scrambled to keep it together. However, every piece of her was falling apart, scattering from her grasp so that she had no hope of holding it all. Don’t. Don’t cry, Sage. Don’t be a crybaby. Don’t…

The voice in her grew more frantic because he didn’t let go.

He’s going to think you are weak. He’s going to think you’re an idiot. You need to get it together. Stop already!

“Luke?” she breathed, knowing he should let her go but never wanting him to.

“I know,” he said, never relaxing the gentle embrace as he held her.

And then, like a dam breaking up the mountain, the tears gushed from her heart over her eyelids and down her cheeks. She grabbed onto him lest she drown in them.

“Oh, baby,” he whispered into her hair. “I know. I know.”

And he did. Every emotion she felt, he absorbed. She was crying now, sobbing uncontrollably. No, Luke didn’t know how to get the tears to stop or what to do to make them stop, but he wasn’t going to abandon her like this. No way. No how.

He held her until the tears began to ebb, and she stood there just letting him hold her.

“I guess this means they really did it,” he said softly, and she nodded. “Wednesday?”

She nodded again and sniffed hard, and he heard the harsh intake of air. “I’ve been trying to get ready.”

No way was she going to like his next suggestion, but Pastor Steve had said listen to what God tells you, and Luke was convinced this was God. “What if we go talk to him? To your dad? Tell him you don’t want to go?”

Instantly she was shaking her head and dragging herself backward out of his grasp. Luke put his hands at his beltline in frustration as she left his embrace.

“No, Luke,” she said, sniffing and swiping and fighting to get back under control. “I don’t want to make it any worse.”

“How could you possibly make it any worse? You’re leaving, Sage. Leaving. Like John Denver on an airplane. That is not going to make anything any better.”

“Yes.” She swiped at her eyes again as she turned to face him. “Yes, it will. For them. It will make it better for them.”

But Luke was no longer convinced of that. “He needs to know, Sage. He needs to know what this is doing to you.”

Then her gaze, sad and accepting, met his. “Don’t you get it? He doesn’t care. He doesn’t care what happens to me. He never has.”

“Okay. That’s it. Come on.” Luke took her hand and started for the door.

“What?” Panic set into her voice. “We’re we going? Luke, what are you doing?”

“Something I should have done three weeks ago.”

“Three…? What?”

They went through the kitchen, him practically dragging her.

“We’ll be back,” Luke said to Jaycee.

She glanced over and scowled. “Don’t hurry on my account.”

He never even slowed down all the way out to his car where he opened the door and deposited Sage into the passenger’s seat. Striding around, he climbed inside and hit the ignition. In seconds they were on the road.

Sage anchored her arms in front of her. “Are you going to tell me where we’re going or not?”

Luke glanced over at her. “I’m tired of pretending there’s nothing we can do.”

“What does that mean?”

“It means I’m not letting you go without a fight.”

“A fight?” Worry crept into her voice and heart. “With who?”

Luke’s glance at her sank deep knowing into her.

“Oh, Luke, no…”

“He needs to know.”

Panic replaced the worry. “This won’t help. He doesn’t care.”

“Then we make him see why he should.”

With effort Sage got reasonableness latched down over the panic. “Let’s just go back. Seriously. I’m sure he’s really busy. We can’t just show up at his work unannounced. What if he won’t even see us?”

“He will,” Luke said, banking on the hope that they would be dealing with the man he had known his whole life and not the one she was terrified of offending. He reached across the seat and took her hand. “Trust me. Okay?”

But she didn’t say okay. She didn’t say anything, and he knew he had just dragged her out of that boat and onto the waves with him. The last thing he could let happen was for her to drown out there. God, help us. Please.

By the time they pulled up at the three-story building marked Whitaker Design, Sage was in full run-the-other-direction mode. Even as Luke found a parking place, she tried to convince him what she knew in her heart—that this was a horrible idea. “Let’s just go. He might not even be here.”

“He’s here. That’s his car.”

Lightheaded had never meant what it did at that moment. “I’m not… This is not a good idea. It’s not, Luke. It’s not.”

He parked and shut the car off. “Don’t move.”

Like she could have if she had wanted to. At her door, he opened it and offered her his hand. Moving was supremely difficult. Breathing was impossible. The sunshine beat down on them bursting little beads of sweat out all over her body. Sage looked down at herself. She wasn’t dressed for this… whatever this was. Appointment. Confrontation. Sneak attack. Ambush.

What does one wear to such a thing? Her mind began traipsing off into environs she had a feeling had no connection to reality. Somehow she was moving. Somehow her hand was in his and they were walking. On the sidewalk. In the door. Up to a reception desk inside. “Luke,” Sage pleaded in barely a whisper. “This is….”

“Yes,” he said to the receptionist who looked up, “we’re looking for Mr. Gregory Lawrence please.”

“Greg… He’s in 216.”

“Thank you.”

Never letting her go, Luke stepped away from the desk and headed for the elevators. Sage felt every glance they attracted, and she latched onto his arm rather than just his hand, trying to get close enough to his ear so she could make him understand. “Really, Luke. Let’s just go home. This is a bad idea.”

At the elevator, he punched the button and stepped back to wait, his other hand going to his beltline as his gaze slid up to the numbers. Another gentleman in a full suit stepped up beside them, and she felt his harsh, judgmental, and dismissive glance. She clutched Luke’s arm even tighter. “Seriously, Luke…”

The elevator dinged, and they boarded with the gentleman. Sage didn’t dare say anything on the little car. Instead, she ducked and tried very hard to hide behind Luke. When the elevator dinged again, he let the gentleman off first and then pulled her forward.

Nothing in Sage was going forward. It was all screaming to go backward, to somewhere that didn’t feel like her insides might explode. “Luke, please.”

“216. Here it is.”

The deep rich wooden door was open slightly, and Luke knocked.

“Knock. Knock.”

Was this what a swoon was like? Did the room start swinging and swaying and then go dark? If so, then she was swooning like a lady on a fainting couch.

“Come in.”

Oh, no. Her heart jerked painfully in her chest. It was him, and he was there, and now they were walking in. Once again Sage ducked behind Luke, fighting to disappear altogether.

“Luke?” her father asked in surprise, his gaze coming up to them from the small desk he sat at. He reached up and swiped the glasses from his face.

Sage didn’t remember he wore glasses. Did she? Had she ever seen him in them? Then he caught sight of her.

“Sage?” he asked in even more surprise. “What are you two doing here?”

“Do you have a minute?” Luke asked as if he was dropping off plans or coming to shoot the breeze.

“Oh. Uh. Sure. Come on in. Have a seat.”

She didn’t want to have a seat. She wanted to run or to go through the floor-to-ceiling window beyond. Either or both would’ve been fine by her. Instead, somehow she was sitting in the chair, watching her father close the door behind them. Don’t cry, Sage. Don’t cry. Just keep it together. Don’t go getting all hysterical here.

But the effort was about to fold her willpower into a crumpled mess and fling it out that window.

“I’m sorry,” her father said as he came back around them to lean on the corner of his desk. “I didn’t know you were coming.”

Luke knew that, but he wasn’t going to take the bait. “We need to talk to you.”

Concern dripped onto the older man’s face. “Okay.”

Still holding her hand, Luke glanced over at her and realized she wasn’t even going to look up much less say anything. So he gathered up his courage and faced her father again. “We thought you should know that Sage doesn’t want to go back to California.”

“Oh.” With that her father slid off the desk and went back around where he put the glasses back on. “Well, the ticket’s already been purchased…”

“Then cancel it.”

Both gazes jumped to him, and he felt her panic and her father’s displeasure.

“Luke,” she breathed, shaking her head with only her eyes.

But he wasn’t backing down now. “Look, you and I both know it’s not a good idea to send her back with no one there. She doesn’t need to be fending for herself for a month. You can’t possibly think that’s a good idea.”

Her father sighed slowly. “We’ve been over this…”

“No. You’ve been over this. You’ve talked about it. You’ve discussed it. We haven’t talked about anything.”

That she wasn’t breathing anymore was imminently evident to Luke, and he hated doing this to her, but it had to be done.

The older man scratched the top of his eyebrow. “And you think this is the way to have this conversation?”

“I think if we don’t have it like this, we aren’t going to have it.”

Another breath and her father put his hands on the desk. “Okay, then talk. I’m listening.”

“Okay. Well, first of all, it’s not fair for you to send her back. She hasn’t done anything…”

“Hasn’t done anything?” Her father rose from the chair, dragging Luke’s gaze up with him. “What do you call showing up after curfew? Drinking and no telling what else? And then there’s that whole getting you into fights. You’ve never been like this in all the time we’ve known you. You’ve always been such a level-headed kid, and now all of a sudden, you’re someone I don’t even recognize.”

Anger was starting to boil through Luke, but he held it down. “Okay, first of all. If you had ever bothered to ask any questions at all, the curfew thing was far more Rory Harris’s fault than Sage’s. And as for the drinking thing, Sage wasn’t drinking. She didn’t even know what kind of party it was going to be until she got there.”

Her father started to protest, but Luke cut him off.

“No. Did you know she texted me that night? Did you know she was scared out of her mind because she was going to have to drive Rory home because he was too drunk to know his head from a hole in the ground? And she did it too.”

“Luke,” Sage pleaded, tugging on his arm. “It’s okay. Really…”

“She was out there. At night. By herself. Driving a guy who could’ve gotten them both killed if he had taken the wheel. Why? Because there was nobody to call to come and get her. Nobody to have her back when she really could’ve used someone. And what does she get for her trouble? Grounded. Cut off from the only people she has to lean on. And you’re going to talk to me about not doing anything? You know what? Save the lecture, okay?”

He glanced at her, knowing what his next statement would do to her. “As for the fight.” Luke turned then and looked right at her father. “For your information, Rory Harris was pawing all over your daughter in front of everyone at that party. He was acting like she was his whore if not worse.”

Sage gasped like she’d been slapped.

Her father straightened. “Listen, there’s no need…”

“If he had done that to Jaycee, and you found out, you would have had him for breakfast and fed what was left of him to the wolves,” Luke said, barreling into the man’s eyes like a semi stuck on full-throttle. “And don’t tell me you wouldn’t have either because I remember standing in that living room getting that talk when I took her to Homecoming Freshman year. I don’t know if you remember that, but I sure do.”

Her father ducked his head and shook it. “This is different.”

“Different?” Luke nearly came out of his skin as he vaulted from the chair. “You’ve got to be kidding me. I’ll tell you what, you may not like it, but you have two daughters, Mr. Lawrence. Two. And they are both special, and they both need a father.”

Now Sage was actually standing, trying to pull him away. “Come on, Luke. Really. Don’t do this. Don’t. Please.”

“Do what?” he asked, facing her. “Defend you? Make you important? What?”

Her eyes came up to his, her lashes brimming with tears. “Please. I’m not… It’s not worth this. Let’s just go.”

With everything in him Luke wanted to lash out at her, to scream at her to stop running herself into the ground for the family that he was beginning to increasingly see didn’t deserve her sacrifice.

“Please, let’s just go. Okay? We should just go,” she continued to plead, pulling him, dragging him to the door. “Please.”

Luke looked back at the man now head down, not even watching them go, and he had never been more disappointed in his life. “Yeah. I guess we should.”

There wasn’t one part of her that felt whole or stable, not one. Her heart was heaving. Her breathing was fighting for every shred of air. Her mind wasn’t even functioning anymore. And then they were on the elevator and then out of the glass doors and back in the parking lot.

“Sage,” he said, trying to start a conversation she didn’t want to have.

“No. Luke. Don’t. Okay. Just don’t.” The tears slipped down her cheeks, and she swiped at them angrily. “I get it. I know what you’re trying to do, but you just don’t understand.”

“You’re right. I don’t. I don’t understand any of this.”

She came over to him then, and she put her arms around him. “I know. I know you don’t, and I love you for that. But this… this is not something you can fix. It’s not. It’s just too broken.”

“He’s wrong.” Luke looked down at her as he held her there in his arms. “He is. He’s wrong about you and about sending you home. He’s wrong about everything.”

How her heart could hold so much love and so much hurt at the same time, Sage couldn’t comprehend. But both were in her in overflowing measures. “Please, can we just go home now? I want to go home.”

The only question was if she even had a home to go to anymore.

“Yeah. We’ll go home.”

From the window, two stories up, Greg Lawrence pulled the slats of the blinds apart and watched them leave. He sighed and shook his head. The kid had guts, he would give him that.

Did he remember the lecture about Jaycee? Like it was yesterday. Seeing his little girl go out on her first official date? He would remember it forever. What he didn’t remember was Sage’s first date or her first boyfriend or her first anything for that matter.

He sat down in his chair, exhausted from the struggle. Yes, he was her father, but he hadn’t been there like he had been for Jaycee. It was incredibly hard to have a relationship with someone 3,000 miles away. Especially a growing daughter who specializes in high heels and high fashion. He had always thought she didn’t need him, didn’t need anything he had to offer. What was he, a struggling architect from backwoods North Carolina? He didn’t have money or prestige or a pedigreed name.

His mind traced back to those days out in California to the mega-firm he’d been hired into. It was his dream job that very quickly turned into an unbelievable nightmare. He remembered with guilt staining the edges meeting Ericka for the first time. She was lovely, just like Sage was now. Small and sweet with a light in her eyes that spoke to his tired, overwhelmed, and desperately needy spirit. The connection was almost instant, and in no time he was taking her out and bringing her flowers.

His own marriage was in shambles anyway. Separated. That’s what they called it. He was separated, and therefore, in his mind he was only one small step away from being single. So he hadn’t told her. Hadn’t mentioned he was anything other than single. But he wasn’t single. He had known it then, and he knew it even deeper now. Swiping the glasses off, he pitched them to the desk. How things had gone so far off the rails he still wasn’t sure.

Then Em had called and wanted to talk, and he finally had to admit that moving to California was about running away when the whole idea of being a husband had gotten too big for him to deal with. Running. That was a good word for him. How many hours, how many days had he run from who he was and the sins he had committed in the name of what was best for himself at the moment?

The weight of them dropped on his shoulders, none so heavy as the look in her eyes, his daughter’s eyes, Sage’s eyes, pleading with Luke to just go because she wasn’t worth it. Greg’s heart turned over inside him, and he closed his eyes to the pain he had caused her, was causing her. Why did he think it his right to banish her when things got rough? Would he ever even think of doing such a thing to Jaycee? Heaven forbid. No. Never.

So why was it so easy to get talked into doing it to Sage? Was she so much less worthy of his love? Was she really any less worthy of his protection and care? Or was he just trying to punish her for…? His head snapped up as he both searched through that thought and beat it backward.

Punishing her for his sins? His mind repeated the phrase, turning it over and punching him in the gut with it. And it was so easy to do because she deserved it, right? She was out with boys doing who knew what, drinking and partying? She didn’t have morals and values. She was from the fast life where anything went. She deserved to be judged, to be kept under thumb and grounded.

But the thought he couldn’t escape from was what would he have done if that had been Jaycee that night? He sat back and exhaled. Luke was right. He was. About all of it. Every single word.

Would he have left Jaycee in a vehicle with a kid who was three sheets to the wind, or would he have told her she could call him? Ache sliced through him. He had told her that. In his mind, he watched himself utter those very words when he gave her that cell phone when she turned 15. “So you can call me if you ever need me.”

He would have moved heaven and earth to get to her if she had needed him. Somehow that thought smashed into the one asking if he had ever even bothered to give Sage his number. Searching and searching, he couldn’t find that memory. Maybe Em had, but then again, as Greg began to release his death grip on what he had been living with, he knew. Em was just like him or maybe worse.

All those years of hurt and pain he had caused her were now being unleased on the most innocent of all of them. Why? Because she was an easy target, because she didn’t fight back.

The memory of her sitting at that table as he pronounced her banishment went through him like a dull serrated knife. She accepted it. She didn’t scream about the unfairness of it all. No. Just like before. She had accepted the grounding, closed herself in her room, disappeared because her presence was too much for the others to deal with civilly much less lovingly.

Love. He smashed up against that word hard.

Grudging acceptance maybe, forced responsibility yes, but he had never opened his heart to love her. It was better that way, he had reasoned. He had his wife and his real kids to think about…

Horror struck him leaving gaping gashes in his spirit. He leaned back and put his hand on his mouth, squinting into that thought. His real kids?

Real kids? What does that even mean?

Why had he never seen this before? Maybe because he didn’t want to look. Maybe because, like Sage, he didn’t think her worth it or worthy of being his “real kid.” The chair crashed forward, and he heaved a hard breath. “Oh, my…” He let out another breath. “He was right. Luke was right. What’ve I done?”

All the way to her house, Luke just held her hand and beat himself up for thinking this would help anything. She wasn’t crying anymore, not sniffing, not moving—just sitting there, accepting her fate and all that came with it.

He glanced over at her. “I’m sorry.”

She smiled that soft, sad smile that tore his heart out. “I know.”

When they pulled up in her parents’ driveway, Sage sighed. Not only was she still leaving, but now Luke looked like someone had run over him. He parked and sat there, staring out of the windshield.

“Thank you,” she finally said softly. He needed to know that even though his heroics hadn’t fixed anything, she was grateful for the effort.

Never really lifting it, his gaze came over and he shook his head.

Somehow she knew how he felt, the ache of defeat even when defeat was a given was hard to take. Gently she put her hand over onto his face. “Hey.”

Slowly his gaze picked up to hers, and she had never seen someone look so shredded. Then without warning, he reached over and pulled her into his arms, holding her there awkwardly over the console between them. Sage twined her arm through his and then up onto his shoulder, letting him hold her but also holding him back now.

After a minute, he sniffed and sat back. “You know I’m still going to text you, right? I’m not just going to forget about you.”

She understood the desire, but she also knew that once she was gone, he would eventually go on with his life. “I’m not going to forget about you either. But…”

“No,” he said as if she was planning to rip out his heart and stomp on it. “This is not the end of the story. It’s not.”

No part of Sage could crush the last of the hope he still held. He would learn in a week or a month or six months, and he would let go then. For now, she couldn’t do that to him even though she more than anyone knew how this story would play out.

He heaved a long sigh and looked at her, reaching over to take her hand. “Will I see you tomorrow?”

It was crazy to want it so badly and yet know it would make no difference in the face of what was coming. Somehow she got soft happiness over all the hurt. “Yeah. Maybe we can go to the beach?”

His face twitched as if the emotion in him was fighting to get out. “Okay.”

They sat like that for a while longer, not really talking just acclimating themselves to this new reality.

“Well,” Sage said, glancing past him at the kitchen window beyond, “I’d better get in there before they come out here with the tar and feathers.”

“Oh, yeah? Who’re they going to get? You or me?”

Sage smiled. “You’d look cute in feathers.”

A second and Luke smiled too. “Let’s not go there.”

One sigh, and she knew it was time to get back to reality. Instantly he knew what her movement meant and he jumped.

“Don’t move.” And with that, he was out of the car, striding around it. Man, she was going to miss that and this car and his arms and his kiss… He opened her door and offered her his hand.

Shaking her head in awe of the deep honor of that simple act, she put her hand in his and let him help her out. It wasn’t for a show. It was him being right there so she didn’t have to do it all on her own. He put his arm around her and shut the door before they started around the car to the back door.

Sage put her hand up onto his, absorbing his warmth and love deep into her soul. Neither was moving quickly. Their steps ambled up the walk, swaying this way and that, together but not entirely graceful. His gaze slid out to the trees beyond and then fell down to her.

“So what time tomorrow?”

Ache traced through her at the vulnerability of the question. “Early if you want. I’m not doing anything.”

“We could bring something to eat. Spend the day out there.” The raw pain seeped through his attempt at being strong. “If you want.”

Answering took all of her concentration. “Okay.”

At the step he turned to her, and in that breath, she was in his arms again, fully, and he was pressing her to him, holding her as if she really might just walk out of his life and be gone forever. His embrace was at once tender and desperate, and Sage rubbed her hand up and down his back, absorbing the pain he never put into words.

He had been so strong for her, and now, as the one of the two who had lived through letting go before, she had to be strong for him. And she would be. She would be strong and hold him and love him until he, just like all the others, let her go and walked away. That’s what love was, learning to let go when the other no longer needs the relationship as much as you do.

Then he released her just a fraction, and she backed up to look at him. His gaze bore down into hers, deeper and deeper, and she let him because she was no longer afraid of what he would find in her heart. There was only love and gratefulness for all he had done for her.

Softly, slowly, he put both hands on her jawline, and watching every inch he subtracted between them, he laid his lips on hers. Their touch drew a deep gasp from her because in his kiss was only unshakable love and permeating gentleness. Sage had thought she could do this. That she could go through the motions, keep him and his love at arm’s length so she wouldn’t get hurt when it ended. Now, as his kisses swept her breath and sanity away, she reached for the last of her resolve to not believe this was real and just like that, it slid through her fingers and dissolved from the scroll of eternity.

Her arms slid up to his back, tightening and locking there. It had nothing to do with thinking and everything to do with letting herself fall into the feeling of him. She never wanted anything else in the world. Just him and his lips on hers, the feel of his hands gripping, grasping, greedy in their need for her, the knowing his love was safe and had no intention of ever hurting her. In that space, in that unwavering safety, she could let go and love him with all of her and be loved by all of him with no holding back.

Gasping and fighting to rein the desire in, he finally tore himself up from her. Sage knew the effort it took to keep himself from her, she felt it too, and she lunged into the protectiveness of his arms, not caring if she seemed impetuous or impulsive, desperate or needy. She was. She was all of those. In him, with him, she could be all that she had never let herself be before, and still he would love her and accept her and hold her. She knew that and how she would ever let that go, let him go…

“I love you,” he whispered into her hair, and Sage fell even harder.

“I know.” Her own voice was a breath. “I love you too.”

Chapter 26

Sage let herself in the back door, knowing what was coming. After all, they surely wouldn’t be satisfied with ripping her from the only love she’d ever known. Oh, no. That would be much too easy and good for someone like her.

Someone like her. The thought pressed in, trying to hurt her like it always had, but this time the sharp-tip only dealt a glancing blow. Someone like her would never be loved like that by someone like Luke Baker. Never.

So, collecting her courage, she stepped into the kitchen where the others were preparing supper. When she looked at the clock, she was surprised to see it was well after five-thirty. Where had that much time gone?

“It’s about time you come in.” Her stepmother shook the water from the tomatoes she was holding as she looked out and watched Luke’s car turn and leave the driveway. She turned then, took one look at her stepdaughter, shook her head with a scowl on her face, and then she pursed her lips and turned back for the sink. “Well, the table needs set. It’s not like the rest of us are on vacation.”

Vacation. Somehow that wasn’t the term Sage would have used for this. “Okay.”

Jaycee came in the other way, grabbed up a piece of celery from the plate and crunched into it. “Rory called.”

“Oh really?” Why did her stepmother sound so incredibly happy about that?

Sage buried the knowing disgust and went to the cabinet to retrieve the plates.

“Yeah. He wants to go to the baseball game in Wilmington on Thursday. Are we doing anything?”

“Uh. Not that I know of.”

“Great!” Jaycee turned and then turned back. “Oh, and it’s a night game, so we might be out late.”

Sage felt both of their glances, but she would not give them what they wanted. She would not react. Instead, she went to the table and distributed the plates. Now for the silverware.

“How late do you think you’ll be?”

“Well, the game starts at seven. It’s a two-hour drive, so it’s definitely going to be after midnight when we get back.”

The hesitation was evident even though Sage was trying not to watch.

“We’ll have to ask your dad, but since it’s Rory…”

One fork. One spoon. One fork. One spoon. Focus on the details. Don’t take the bait.

“He said we could get Trey and Bethany to go with us if it’s a problem.” Jaycee continued to crunch on the celery, obviously trying to be as obnoxious as possible so she could get a rise out of Sage.

“That might be better. You know how your dad can be about these things.”

“It’s baseball,” Jaycee said with a shrug. “It’s not like we’re out parking somewhere.” And Sage felt the glance slice through her.

“I know. But we’ll just have to see.”

At the cabinet, Sage got out the five blue glasses, balancing them in the hands she was trying very hard to keep steady. They’re just trying to rattle you, Sage. Don’t let them shake your cage.

“Oh, and I’m sure we’ll go to the bonfire together on Friday. I can’t wait to see everybody. I think this next month is definitely going to be the best part of the whole summer.”

The glass in Sage’s hand slipped mid-transfer to the table. She jumped, trying to catch it, but only managed to make it hit harder, sending it crashing down in a hail of shards right at her feet. The sound reverberated through the kitchen, shaking everything including her resolve to keep the pain locked inside her.

“What in the…?” Emily spun. “For the love of… Sage! Good grief! Can you not carry out one simple task without it turning into a complete catastrophe?”

“I’m sorry.” Fighting not to cry, Sage looked at her. “It slipped.”

“It slipped? Everything just slips with you, doesn’t it? Why is it that everything is such a disaster with you around?”

Sage backed up heedless of the danger, swallowing the insults down, the shattered glass now scattered on the table and all over the floor around her. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean…”

“Well, clean it up already. It’s not like we’re your servants.”

Blinking and knowing she had no other choice, Sage nodded and reached for one shard lying on the table.

“Sage!”

She had heard the thump of the backdoor but hadn’t processed what it meant in the midst of her stepmother’s harsh judgment and demands. But now, sensing this was where what was left of her worth died, she looked over and gasped the crushing tears back. Don’t cry, Sage. Not now. Please don’t cry now.

Face hard, her father came into the kitchen, walking toward her, his eyes flashing.

“Don’t touch it,” he demanded, and then his gaze snapped to his wife’s as she stood there, arms crossed anger slashing across her face.

“What do you mean, ‘Don’t touch it’? She made the mess,” her stepmother said. “She should clean it up.”

Her father stood, hands on beltline, looking right at Sage, and then slowly the anger dissipated from his face. “No. She doesn’t.”

Disbelief drained down her stepmother’s face. “What do you mean she doesn’t?” She pointed to Sage. “She dropped the glass. She needs to clean it up!”

However, instead of fighting, her father dragged in a breath. “She made a mistake. She didn’t do it on purpose.”

“Those are our good glasses!”

He only glanced at his wife. “And we can get another one.” A half-shake of his head and he stepped over to Sage. His eyes were full of remorse and love as he put his hand on her head. “We can’t get another Sage.”

“I don’t believe…” With a shake of her head, Emily stomped from the room passing Jaycee who stood there with hate bleeding from her gaze.

A moment and she shook her head as well before following her mother out.

Sage couldn’t look at them. She was lost in his gaze. “I’m really sorry. It… it slipped.”

“I know.” His smile was soft. “You know.” He dropped his hand from her, turned and grabbed the trashcan before heading for the clear blue shards. “I’ve made a few mistakes in my life too.” Bending he started picking up the glass as Sage watched him, trying to process what had just happened. “But we’re only defined by those if we let ourselves be.”

Feeling the help but knowing this really was her mess to clean up, Sage bent to help him. However, just as she reached for the pieces, he put his hand out and stopped her.

“Don’t, okay?” His eyes came up to hers, and there was an amazing mix of firmness and gentleness. “Dads need to be good for something.”

Although she was grateful for the gesture, Sage knew it meant very bad things for the stability of the family. The family she would no longer be a part of by Wednesday night. Feeling helpless for him, she watched her father clean up the glass and then finish up making supper. When he called for the others, Sage knew he was taking a million bullets for her. She hated that for him. He didn’t deserve them, and she wished she could tell him that. But talking to him? About this? About anything? The very thought sent her spiraling back into her own little corner of the world.

She wondered as they ate their very quiet meal if he was thinking about Luke and what he had said in the office. She knew she surely was.

When the meal was over, Sage stood to clear the dishes, not making any big show of it. At the sink, she started the water, determined not to play the part of the no-dish-hands debutante they thought she was. She’d just started washing the first pan when she heard her father moving behind her. He set a glass next to her on the cabinet.

“Why don’t you all go on?” he said to the others. “We can get this.”

Fear and panic jerked into Sage. What was he doing? He was going to make it a thousand times worse! She wanted to tell him that, to tell him he didn’t have to do this for her. He was going to stay. She wasn’t. Without seeing the pan, she washed it and put it into the other sink.

Coming up next to her, he flipped his tie over his shoulder and picked up the pan. “I never took you for someone who did dishes.”

She smiled at what she perceived was a compliment. “Neither did I.” Around and around the sponge in her hand went on the little pot. “You don’t have to help me.”

He nodded and smiled with tight lips. “I know.”

“She’s leaving, huh?” Luke’s mother said as he sat at the table, pushing the ravioli around the plate, never seeing it and certainly not eating it.

He felt like he might never eat again. He’d been there for an hour, and still he’d only gotten one bite into him, and that one he still felt like he was going to throw up. His whole body hurt—inside and out. How would he ever watch her get on that plane? He would never live through it. He nodded and then let his head shake as his eyes closed on the searing pain.

She let out a breath and put her hand on his head and then her arms around him. “Sometimes you go all in, and it doesn’t work out. But I love how much you care. You’re so much like your dad.”

That surprised Luke. “Dad?”

“Oh, you know, he doesn’t act like it sometimes.” Coming around, she sat down at the table with him. “But I’ve seen him out there, working for us, caring about us, loving us—even when it was so incredibly hard on him to keep going.” She reached up and ruffled his hair. “You’ve got a good heart in you, kid. Don’t let this convince you not to use it.”

Back in her room, Sage was sitting on the bed, cell phone in hand. She wanted to text him, to tell him what a difference he had made, to thank him for everything he had done. But how do you put something like that into a few words on a screen?

The knock on the door brought her up and scooting across the bed. “Uh, who is it?”

An answer didn’t come immediately, and when it did, it shocked her. “Sage, it’s Dad, can I come in?”

Dad? Panic slammed into her, thoroughly unraveling every remaining frazzled edge of her spirit. “Uh, oh, yeah, just… just a second!”

Perfect. Her room needed to be perfect. She fluffed the pillows and lined them up by the wall. The suitcases still stood at the edge of the bed, a stoic reminder that she was just passing through. However, she could do nothing about them now.

“Uh. Um.” She smoothed out her hair and her clothing, standing there, knowing she wasn’t at all presentable but utterly helpless to change that.

He knocked again. “Sage?”

“Uh, yeah, yes. Come… come on in.”

When he opened the door and peered inside, she could hardly keep herself in one piece. Her breathing constricted to nearly nothing. Was he going to ream her out now? Tell her she was leaving tomorrow instead of Wednesday? Tell her how she and Luke had no right to say the things he had? She knew that now, deeper than she had even at the time.

“Can I…?” he asked, tipping his head into the room.

“Oh, yes. Yes. Of course. Please.” She put out her hand like a lady at tea. Why did her mind say she should ask him if he would like anything to drink, some tea or coffee maybe? She didn’t know, but her mind asked it just the same.

He came in and took the little chair she had used when she was sewing. The thing would probably break under his weight, but he spun it around and sat down on it backwards before realizing she was still standing for inspection.

“Oh, please, Sage. Sit. No need to stand there on my account.”

Sit. Okay. She could do that. He told her to sit. So sitting was all right. Carefully she lowered herself to the edge of the bed because other than the floor, there was no other option.

Her father watched her, his arms crossed on the back of the chair. When she was down, Sage smoothed out her jeans and then her hair, knowing she shouldn’t be fidgeting but also knowing he was scrutinizing her like she was under a microscope. Look up. Look at him. Sage, get your eyes up.

“Hm,” she cleared her throat, wondering what she was supposed to say. Did he want her to apologize about before—the glass and the office? Heat started to fill her body, radiating outward so she knew he could feel it too.

“I think we need to talk,” he finally said quietly. “About a lot of things.”

Her giggle was only two soft, nervous sounds, and she reached up and spun her fingers through her hair as she nodded, gaze still on the carpet. “Okay.”

His face dropped an emotional octave. “First of all, I need you to know that none of this is your fault.”

That statement slammed into her, and she moved to protest, but he held up his hand to stop her.

“I know. You think it is, and it’s my fault because I let you think that.” He let his gaze fall to the floor. “After you two left today, I went over and talked with the pastor.”

Panic hit her hard. She was sure her reputation at the church was already set in stone. That it could conceivably sink any lower was not welcome news. Then reality knocked into that thought. What did it matter? She wasn’t going back there anyway. Oh, to stop the thoughts because every one wrenched up more troubling emotions. Somehow she kept them all from her face, but he needed to stop now because she might not be able to do so much longer.

“We talked a little bit, and he set me straight about a few things. Like the fact that I haven’t been the dad you’ve needed me to be. I guess in a way I knew that. I just didn’t want to admit it.”

“It’s okay,” she said, pushing the words from her heart and forcing her gaze to hold onto his. “I understand.”

“Do you?” His eyes questioned that. “Do you really?” He let out a breath. “Because I don’t. I want to, but it all gets jumbled up in my head so even if I know what to do, I don’t do it because… well, because of a lot things.”

Sage nodded, hearing him, knowing he needed to say these things, and that she needed to be strong and let him.

“That’s why I think it would be a really good idea if we went to talk with the pastor tomorrow. Just the two of us and then the others can come later on.”

The pastor? No, her heart screamed, but she hacked that protest in half before it could even come out or trace across her features. “T—tomorrow?” Her hand went up to her hair and spiraled there. “Um.” She cleared her throat because she was squeaking, and she hated that. With force, she put her hand on her lap and made it stay there. “Um, Luke and I were… well, we were thinking about… going to the beach tomorrow.”

Her father nodded slowly. “Well, maybe you can go with him on Wednesday.”

Wednesday? She wanted to scream the word at him. Didn’t he realize she would be gone by Wednesday? “Oh. Uh, well…”

He dropped his gaze and took a deep breath before lifting it back to hers. “I canceled the plane ticket, Sage. The one for Wednesday.”

Her eyes went wide. “You… what?”

“I canceled it. I called your mom a little bit ago and told her you’ll be staying here for the rest of the summer.”

Joy followed instantly by terror surged in her heart. “The rest… Oh. Are you sure about that? I mean, I know how much… I know how hard this has been on everyone.”

“Especially you,” he said softly. “And I’m sorry about that. But we’re going to work on it. I promise you, we will. What I don’t want is for you to get on that plane and ever think that this family isn’t your family.”

She heard what he was saying, and she wanted to be happy about that, but… Her gaze slipped from his back to the carpet. “They hate me.”

He tipped his head as if that statement had hurt him. “They hate the situation.”

But she shook her head. “No. They hate me. They wish I had never been born. They think I’m just one big mistake that never should have happened.”

At that, and looking imminently helpless, he stood and came over to her. When he sat on the bed, Sage cringed away from his presence. However, after only a second’s pause, he put his arm around her and then put his hand on her head and pulled it to his shoulder. “I’m so sorry about all of this, sweetheart.” He shook his head. “I should have seen what this was doing to you.”

Sage gasped the emotion down though it overtook her like a flash flood. Somehow she had to keep it together because falling apart was not allowed. “I’m… okay. I am.” She pulled herself away from him, but she couldn’t get the lies solid enough in her heart to look at him.

“I don’t think that’s true, Sage, and I don’t think it’s been true for a long time.”

Why wouldn’t he just let it go? She was trying to. However, she sniffed and nodded, forcing all the tears back into their cell and slamming the door on them. She would not cry. It would help nothing.

“Tell you what, why don’t you call Luke,” he finally said. “See if he’s free to come over tonight. The Sox are playing. Maybe he can help us cheer them on. They need all the help they can get at this point.”

Complete shock washed over her when she looked up at him, and her hand went up to her hair as if a windstorm had wrecked her hairstyle in the last five minutes. “Luke?”

“Yeah.” Her father stood and took a step away before he turned with a smile. “I’m betting he wants to hear about your change of plans.” He walked to the door but stopped there. “And if you can, keep tomorrow open for me. Okay?”

A second and a small smile, and she nodded not at all trusting this feeling of hope.

Softly he smiled at her acceptance. “Great.” And with that he stepped out and closed the door softly.

Sage’s thoughts spiraled through the entire conversation and really the entire day. In the next heartbeat, she grabbed up the cell phone and dialed it. One ring. Two. Three. “Come on, Luke.” Completely on its own, her knee started bouncing. “Answer your phone already.”

“Hello?” It was incredible the amount of pain that single greeting could hold.

“Hey,” she said softly, her heart wanting nothing more than to hold him.

“Hey,” he said, sounding like he had no energy left.

“Um.” She barely stopped the giggle of joy. “Do you have a minute?”

“Sure. What’s up?”

She almost laughed out loud because finally the news was catching up with her heart. “No. I mean do you have a minute to come over?”

Confusion washed through his voice. “Over? Now?”

“Yeah.”

“Right now? To your house?”

“Yeah.”

“Uh, I… can. Is something wrong?”

“No. I just need to see you.”

“Okay.”

“Great. Then I’ll see you in a couple.”

“Uh. Yeah. Okay. A couple.”

When she hung up, Sage took a real, actual, deep breath. The first of the day. It felt so good. She stood and looked down at herself. Then her gaze came up and found her looking right into the mirror. “Wow,” she said softly. “He really must love me because I’m a mess!”

Reaching up, she fingered her hair one way and then the other. There was no time for a shower or a curling iron, all her make-up and every stitch of clothing other than what she was wearing was packed. She picked her hands up and shook her head at her own reflection, knowing he was going to be here any minute. “Wow. Who would have ever believed this? Sage Wentworth in all her glory.”

Somehow that he wasn’t even going to notice or mind made her feel loved until it practically curled her toes. “I blame this on, you, Luke Baker.” And then she smiled the happiest smile she’d had in two months.

Luke braced himself as best he could spiritually, mentally, emotionally, and physically on the short drive to her house. It was already getting dark out, and he couldn’t help but think how well that matched his mood. Dimmer and dimmer the world was slowly shutting off around him and inside him. When he rounded the corner into their driveway, his head did the count of vehicles while his heart told him it was better not to.

He, of all people, knew she didn’t make random hey-come-see-me-for-no-reason phone calls. This had to be big, and if it was big, it was bad. The car stopped nearly on its own, and he threw it into park and killed the engine. However, he’d barely had a chance to take a breath to settle his nerves and gather his bravery than out the back door she came.

She was in the same thing she’d been in before. Nice jeans and an off-white blouse, only now she had thrown on a peach-colored knit thing with holes all over on it. Her hands were in her pockets as she came to the car, and he got out, swimmy-headed at the sight of her, but trying very hard to keep himself in check so he could deal with whatever this SOS was about.

“Hey,” she said, her gaze sliding from his to the sidewalk.

Holding the door for balance and stability, he looked at her, trying to figure out where this was going. “Hey.”

Then, with effort, her gaze came up to his and held there. Luke was having major trouble deciphering all that she wasn’t staying.

“You interested in going for a walk?” she finally asked, swaying up on her toes and back down onto her heels.

“Uh.” He slammed his mouth closed so he wouldn’t ask the desperate questions in his heart. “Sure.”

Sage nodded and came over to him at the car as he shut the door. A second and she reached over and took his hand before lifting his arm up and over her shoulders. There were so many questions jamming into him, Luke couldn’t figure out which one to ask first.

“I wanted to tell you thank you,” Sage said as their steps wound around the back of the car and went off into the fading light beyond.

“For what?”

“For what you did with my dad, standing up like that, for me.”

He wanted to say a lot of things but defeat kept them from coming out.

“We talked just now, Dad and me.” She nodded, and he began to sense something had changed. “We’re going to see the pastor tomorrow, see if we can work some things out.”

How he could feel so happy for her and so very disappointed for himself, Luke didn’t know, but instantly both cascaded into him.

Step, step, step, and then she looked up at him and smiled. “So maybe we can go do the beach thing on Wednesday? It’s not supposed to rain or anything, is it?”

“Wednesday?” His spirit rammed hard into that word. “But…”

And then he saw the sparkle in her eyes and the smile she was trying very hard not to smile. His eyes went wide, and his steps stopped.

“Wait.” Luke turned to her, scanning her face, and suddenly he knew. “Are you saying what I think you’re saying?”

Her smile came on full-wattage, and it blew him away. “Yeah, I’m staying. No California on Wednesday.”

“Oh.” How could a guy be reduced to knee-buckling joy by such a few little words? In the next breath, he had her up in his arms, and they were spinning together in time and space. Then, slowly, carefully, sensing that maybe he was imagining all of this, he let her slide to the ground. “Are you serious? I mean, you’re not messing with me?”

“Serious as a heart attack.” Then she came to him and her fingers played with his collar. “But we could discuss the messing with you part.”

The breath of relief went all the way through him, jerking up hope and amazement and joy. However, before he could process any of that, she pressed her fingers into the hair at his neckline, pulling his lips down to hers. The taste of her was as sweet as honey and warm as sunshine. Luke could feel that somehow inexplicably Sage Hollywood and the Sage he was coming to know and love could in fact be a dangerous combination in the right measures of hot and homey.

She ended the kiss first, backing up, staring up at him with daring and seduction etched on the whole of her. “So, how brave are you feeling?”

That shot his eyebrows up. “Uh? Brave?”

Then the seduction fled as she melded herself into his arms, and he held her there not wholly sure he could withstand whatever she had in mind.

“Yeah, the Sox are playing tonight, and I really need someone to explain this whole baseball thing to me because I am so not getting the fascination.”

Luke laughed out loud and hugged her to him tightly, loving how every curve meshed with him. “Okay, see, the guys in the red, those are the good guys.”

She nodded. “And the guys in the white with blue pinstripes are Satan.”

He laughed again. “Hey, you’re getting it.”

One more hug, and Sage let herself drift off into the dreamland of simply being with him. “So, you interested in watching with us then?” She knew the untenable position this could put him in as if the sword of Damocles was bearing down from above.

The breath was soft but there. “And they won’t tar and feather me?”

A moment and she shook her head. “Dad said to invite you, but I don’t know about the others. I’m guessing they are going to be non-too-pleased with the change of plans.”

After a breath of a pause, he looked down at her. “You don’t want to be alone?”

Although she really wanted to protest the assumption, it jerked her head down so fast she couldn’t. “That’s bad, huh?”

However, he simply tightened his grip on her. “Well, under the circumstances, I’d call it smart.”

They turned for the house, now shining in the darkness beyond, and Sage managed to wrap his arm up and around her shoulders as she held onto his hand. She loved that hand. It was warm and real and safe.

“So, you and your dad are going to talk with the pastor?” Luke asked after only a few steps.

“Yeah.”

He nodded. “And how are you with that? You good?”

The steps continued. The words did not. Sage didn’t know how to put into words all the conflicting things that thought brought up. It would be just the two of them, just the three of them actually, and she wasn’t at all sure who she was the most intimidated by.

“The pastor’s a good guy,” Luke tried again. “He’s real smart about stuff like this. Not demanding or sending you to hell over anything.”

Nodding, she gripped his hand even harder, feeling the terror grip the middle of her soul.

“Hey,” he finally said softly. “Talk to me. Tell me what’s going on in that head of yours.”

Sage glanced up, and as usual, she didn’t want to be honest with him. Why that always felt so close to death, she couldn’t say, but it did.

At the car, they stopped, and Luke leaned on it and drew her to him. She loved being here in his arms, safe and protected from all the horrible things that sought to take her down.

“I’m not…” she started and then shook her head. “I don’t…” This was getting worse because it was now dragging up tears she hadn’t known were there and had no defense against.

“Don’t…?”

The lack of oxygen was making her head feel like an unstable fish tank full of water teetering on the edge of a table. “Um. It’s just that… Well, um, I’m not real good with guys around.”

His laugh slipped out before he could stop it. “Um, okay. What does that mean?”

She shook her head into his chest and sniffed, hating herself for being so incredibly weak. “When… when I have to ask for something or say something, I never go to Jason. I always go to my mom.”

Luke nodded, his demeanor now falling into serious. “That makes sense.”

“Does it?” She was so surprised by his answer that she jerked up to look at him. “It makes sense?”

He looked like he was puzzled by the question, and he shrugged. “Well, yeah. She’s your mom.”

However, gazing into his soft, gentle eyes, Sage knew it was more than that. A moment and she dove back into the protectiveness of his embrace. She had to say this, to get it out because it was clawing its way from inside her chest. “When I was little, really little, Jason used to babysit me.”

Luke never said anything, but he tightened his grip on her just the same.

“He didn’t like it if I was playing or doing anything where he was. If he came into the room and I was there, he’d tell me to go find somewhere else to play.”

The breaths under her temple had slowed. “Did he ever hit you?”

“No.” She shook her head slowly as the tears came up. “But he yelled a lot. About everything.” A swallow and a breath as the memories came up. “One day, he was working on something at home. I don’t know what it was, but when he left, I wanted to give him a picture I was drawing so I got up on his chair. I was putting the picture on his desk when he came back in and completely freaked out. He started screaming at me that I was messing everything up, that I was just impossible to deal with, and then he took my picture and mashed it up and threw it in the trash.

“My mom came running in and picked me up. She said she was sorry that she hadn’t been watching me, that I was supposed to be in the other room, and she didn’t know I’d gotten into his office, and it wouldn’t happen again. Then she took me out and gave me swats and told me to never, ever disturb Jason again because he was a busy and important man.” Sage sniffed and shook her head, trying to corral the tears. “I’m afraid I’m going to start crying tomorrow, that I’m not going to be able to help it, and I can’t do that with them, but I don’t know how not to.”

The words were gushing out of her again like a torrent she couldn’t stop. “I mean, what if they ask me like, something like about this, and I can’t make myself not?”

“Okay, wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait.” He waved his hands as if desperately trying to get her to stop. “I’m a little confused here. Why are you not supposed to cry?”

Why had she started down this path again? Why hadn’t she just shut up, done the meeting, gotten through it, and gone on with life? Why couldn’t she just shut up as she always had, put the little giggling, smiley face on, and kept all the junk in her heart where it belonged?

“Sage?” Luke said when she didn’t answer. “What’s wrong with crying?”

She sniffed, which she hated because that was like putting a stamp on her utter ineptness. As dates went, this one had to rank right down on the bottom for him. What was she doing? She was being the sniveling little brat Jason had always said she was. All these years she had tried to tell him differently, tried to not be this pathetic excuse for the female species, tried to prove him wrong, and now, all her lies were exposed for the truth that had always been. She really was exactly what he’d always said she was.

“Hey,” Luke said, breaking into her thoughts as he pulled her backward from him and gazed down at her in concern. “Okay. Seriously. What’s up with the no crying rule? I thought that one was only for boys.”

Pulling her gaze up to his, she got ironic on her face. “Or girls who want any boy to ever think they’re not completely pathetic.”

“Wow.” That backed him up another inch. “Pathetic?” He nodded three times and then squinted. “Let me guess, Jason?”

She tipped her head, shrugged, and sniffed. “And every other guy on the planet.”

This nod went down only. “What about this guy? The one standing here right now.” He looked down at himself. “I don’t see him running for the hills over a few tears.”

Sage shook her head and dropped her gaze. “Give it time.”

The knife of that statement sliced right through Luke, and he sighed, holding it back so she wouldn’t think it was about her. So much hurt stored in that tiny body. He pulled her to him again, thinking about the coming challenges. “What if I go with you tomorrow?”

That yanked her up, head and body away from him, and she stared at him with wide, disbelieving eyes. “With me?” She reached up and swiped one of the tears off her cheek with her wrist. “To the pastor’s?”

Luke put nonchalance on his face and shrugged.

“You would do that?” She swiped at more tears, sniffing and shaking her head. “I’m sure you’ve got better things to do.”

“Eh.” A second and he put his arm around her. “I did, but I think my plans just changed.”

Now next to him on the car, she put her hand on his chest and looked up at him. “You’re serious? You would really go with me.”

Rather than laughing it off because he could feel how important this was to her, he looked down at her. “Yeah, I’d really go with you.”

Sage let out a long breath, never breaking the connection with his eyes. Then she nodded, barely moving her head as she lifted her lips to his and closed her eyes. Love in colors he had never seen before cascaded over him, and he smiled at the simple yet complete trust in her whole being. Gently he lowered his lips to hers and brushed there, an act which ignited his soul with a myriad of white-hot fireworks. One more kiss and he pulled her to him. “We should go inside, or we’re going to miss the game.”

Although Sage wanted to say something snarky to keep him out there, she nodded, held onto him, and walked inside with him. Into and through the kitchen they went all the way to the living room where Jaycee sat in one chair with a magazine in her lap and Ryder lay sprawled on the floor by the television. On the screen, the game was in progress.

Sage wished she knew more about the game so she could tell if it was almost over or just starting. Alas, her baseball knowledge was only eclipsed by her understanding of rocket science.

Next to her Luke hesitated at the doorway, and Sage knew she was asking him to enter the lions’ den with her. She looked up at him, knowing she shouldn’t make him do this. At that moment voices from down the other way split into the room, and all three gazes went that way.

“No, I don’t understand! I told you, Greg, it’s her or us!”

Ryder rolled to the side and joined their confusion. “What’s going on?”

“It’s nothing,” Jaycee said, her gaze suddenly jumping over to the two figures hovering in the darkness of the doorway, and her gaze became a glare.

“Reasonable? You want me to be reasonable about this? I’m the only reasonable one in this whole mess! When you asked me if she could come, I reasonably said, ‘Yes’ because that’s what a good person would do. When she showed up all high-and-mighty, I tried to work around it because that’s what a reasonable person would do!”

It was completely amazing how unreasonable Emily could make the word reasonable sound.

“Why are Mom and Daddy fighting?” Ryder asked, presumably to Jaycee because he didn’t seem to notice the others standing there.

Jaycee, however, looked right at them instead of at him. “You want to take this one, Sage? You want to tell Ryder why Mom and Dad are screaming at each other?”

The breath threatened to take her right down with it, but Sage released it, knowing she couldn’t run, couldn’t fight, couldn’t fix any of it. A moment and she looked up at Luke who stood there, frozen to the spot. She rubbed his chest once and put her head down, fighting the tears and hopelessness even as both overtook her.

“I have had it! I. Have. Had. It!” Emily screamed, coming out of their room and stomping down the hallway. “I am not…”

When she broke into the living room, every gaze save for Sage’s met her, and she stopped like she’d been hit by a train going the other direction. She dragged in a breath that halted the words but did nothing to calm the rage on her face. Just like that she turned and ran right into her husband who was following her.

“Em, can’t we talk about this?” he asked, his hands on her. “Please.”

But she shook her head and pushed past him. “I’m done.” She slipped through his grip and fled down the hallway. “I’m going to my sister’s.”

“Em, come on. Em. Stop. Wait. Please.”

“No, Greg! This is not my fault, and I’m tired of feeling like it is.”

Their argument went through the back hallway and came out in the kitchen. Slowly Ryder scrunched up from the floor, his eyes wide with panic and fear.

“Don’t, Greg! Don’t follow me! I’m not kidding. Don’t!”

“Why’s Mom leaving?” Ryder asked with fear twining through the question.

Jaycee let out a hard breath as the back door slammed shut. “Well, that’s just great.” She stood from the chair and slammed the magazine into it. “You couldn’t just leave, could you? You had to go and completely wreck everything! Way to go, Sage. Mission accomplished.” And with that, she fled down the back hallway, presumably to her room where the door slammed, jolting right through Sage.

The emotions were whipsawing through Sage like an out-of-control wildfire. What had she done? She should have just left, like Jaycee said. She should never have thought this would fix anything. Lifting her gaze, she saw Ryder staring at her, tears in his eyes, and Luke’s comment about boys not crying slashed through her. She had to do something, something to calm the fear in her little brother’s stricken eyes.

“Ryder,” she said, the name squeaking out of her. “I’m so sorry.”

“Why is everybody so mad?” He pleaded for her to explain the unexplainable.

“They’re just trying to work some things out,” Luke said at her side, and the solidity of his voice jolted her even harder.

She looked up at him, and although he didn’t look unfazed, at least he wasn’t freaking out like she was.

“Here.” Luke took her hand and pulled her into the room and over to the couch where he sat and held his hand out for Ryder. It took a second for the child to accept the invitation. When he sat on the other side of Luke on the couch, Luke put his arm around the boy. “Sometimes Moms and Dads fight. Doesn’t mean they don’t love each other. Just means they have things they’re working out.”

“Are they going to get a divorce?” Ryder asked, the fear overwhelming the statement.

Luke backed up. “Now where would you get an idea like that?”

“’Cause I heard them talking about it the other day, that somebody had cheated on a test or something.”

Sage’s heart turned over in her chest, knowing the fear that was Ryder all too well. A second and she stood, pulled her top down, and went to sit on the other side of her little brother. Knowing she had no frame of reference for how to do this, she put her arms around him, feeling incredibly awkward and self-conscious. “I know, baby. I know.”

And at that, he curled into her arms and his tears streamed out. “I don’t want them to get a divorce. I don’t want Daddy to leave.”

Her own tears burst to the surface, and she looked up to Luke for help. His gaze and small smile told her he understood her plight all the way to the bottom of it.

“You know what,” Luke said, rubbing the child’s back between them.

“What?” Ryder managed, backing up and wiping his eyes.

“You know Pastor Steve, right?”

Ryder was looking at him as if he was the Oracle at Delphi and held all the answers to life’s most vexing problems. The child nodded seriously.

“Okay,” Luke continued. “Well, Pastor Steve told me the other day that God does miracles, right? Like not just back in the Bible days but right here and now. So maybe.” His gaze came up to hers as if requesting permission to continue. “Maybe we need to ask for a miracle. Maybe God knows how to fix this.”

Sage sure hoped so because she had no clue. However, she jumped in, sensing a second to the motion might help. “Luke’s right, Ryder. Remember when you told me you didn’t want me to leave?”

His gaze came over to hers, glistening with the tears on his lashes.

“Yeah, well.” She smiled softly. “I’m not leaving.”

“You’re not?” Ryder’s eyes went wide.

“Nope, not until August.” At least she hoped that was still the case.

Ryder lunged at her, and the hug caught her off-guard. She hugged him back, at first not wholly graceful, but then, melting into the feel of holding him as he gripped her.

“We’re going to get through this,” she whispered. “We are.”

“Hm.”

The noise from behind them jerked Sage’s gaze up and over to it, and she found her father standing there looking a million years older as he ran his hand over his head and stared down at them.

“Oh, Mr. Lawrence,” Luke said, scrambling up off the couch.

“Don’t.” Her father held up his hand and shook his head as if he could take no more.

“Dad?” Ryder asked, sliding off the couch and standing there as if his father might explode if he moved another muscle.

Sage’s heart snagged and held right there, dangling over the cliff of what her father would do.

The flash of a moment and he opened his arms to his son, and with only that Ryder rushed to him and latched on. Holding the child to him, her father looked over to them. Sage looked over to Luke for what to do next as he stood there, hands on beltline.

A moment and her father let out a long breath, and his face crumpled. “I don’t think she’s coming back.”

That statement ripped through Sage. If she had just left, none of this would have happened. She stood, slowly, wrapping her arms in front of her. “Dad, I…”

“No.” He held up a hand to stop her. “This is not your fault.”

Oh, but it was. She so knew it was. Every member of her family was torn and shredded, and they wouldn’t be if…

Her father bent down then before kneeling on one knee to hold his son. If there were words, no one found them, and after a moment, Luke stepped up behind Sage and put his hands on her arms. The guilt and grief dragged her eyelids down. What now? She had no idea.

Chapter 27

“Do you want me to come here in the morning?” Luke somehow asked as Sage walked him out. How could he still think straight about anything? Her thoughts were so jumbled, nothing was coming out with any sense attached to it at all.

“I don’t know,” she breathed. “I should probably go with Dad. If he’s still going…”

At the car, Luke wrapped her in his arms and held her. “I think he will.”

She melted there into his arms and closed her eyes. “I hope so.”

When Sage awoke the next morning, her heart said she should be grateful, but her spirit couldn’t quite get there. They were scheduled to be at the good pastor’s house at nine. Letting out a sigh as she looked at the clock, all she wanted to do was roll over, pull the covers over her head, and call in sick. Did nervous stomach count? How about a panic headache that was already gnawing on her brain? Or maybe she could fake an injury. Run her finger through the sewing machine or slam it in a drawer or something. Nothing horrible. Just enough to have to go to the ER rather than the church. Anything but the church.

Luke threw on the only clean pair of jeans from his closet, a yellow T-shirt, and one of the darker plaid shirts. It would be hot again, but he didn’t want to show up looking like the lawn boy. He considered texting her, thought better of it, then rethought that thought. It couldn’t hurt.

His fingers flew over the keys, telling her he would be there, and that he was praying. Knowing no more he could do, he hit send and headed for breakfast.

Sage had just applied the deep red lipstick and was in final-preparation mode when the knock sounded on her door. “Come in,” she called as if she and sunshine were one in the same.

Her father poked his head around the door and stopped when he saw her as she turned from the little vanity. “Well, I was going to ask if you’re ready, but…”

Standing regally, Sage put on her brightest smile. “All done.”

His gaze slid all the way down her and then back up again, and he smiled, kind of. “Um, Jaycee’s going to be watching Ryder. So I guess when you’re ready.”

She lifted her shoulders and squeaked a giggle. “Ready as I’ll ever be.”

Why this walk was so incredibly intimidating, Luke would never understand, but from the parking lot to the pastor’s door, he felt like a marathon runner with ten miles to go. Steeling his nerves and his courage, he climbed the steps and rang the doorbell. Now if God would just help him keep breathing for however long this took, he would be great.

“Oh, Luke,” Mrs. Mitchell said when she opened the door. Her hesitation told him she was trying to protect those inside.

“Hi, Mrs. Mitchell.” What to say and how to say it? “I came to be with Sage if that’s okay.”

Soft understanding drifted into her eyes. “Certainly. Come on in.”

Stepping inside, he followed her not to the office as he had anticipated but down the long hallway beyond.

“They’re in the living room. Would you like something? Water, tea, lemonade?”

“No. I’m…” However with one step into the living room and one glance at her, all of the words in him fled for their lives. Satiny silk, cream-colored blouse that actually shone in the soft light, black slacks that were somehow at once fitted and flared, hair up in a bun that had angry librarian written all over it, and make-up looking ready for a runway or Paris, Sage stood there flanked by the two older men. Luke’s heart did a perfect swan dive into his shoes. Square-one was starting to get really frustrating.

When she looked over at him and her gaze fell to the floor, Luke squelched the frustration rising in him. This wasn’t a test. It was her navigating intimidating waters the only way she knew how. He just wished he could get through to her that she didn’t have to retreat into perfect to deal with the world.

“Luke?” Pastor Steve asked, looking to the others in concern.

“Pastor.” Luke stepped up and shook each hand in turn.

“We… This…” the pastor started only to be interrupted by Sage.

“I… I’m sorry, Pastor.” She looked first at the one and then the other. “Dad. I hope you don’t mind. I asked Luke to come.” Suddenly she seemed to hesitate at their puzzled and concerned faces.

Luke could see the ship tipping, and he scrambled for something to say to right it. “I know this is about the family stuff, but I also know that Sage could really use a friend. I hope you don’t mind if I just stay out here while you all talk. I promise I won’t be no bother.”

The two men exchanged glances and finally nodded.

Her father put out his hand again. “Thanks for coming. I know Sage appreciates it.”

At that moment, Luke sure hoped so.

“Well,” the pastor said, “as I was saying, I’d like to speak with you, Gregory, first. Maybe 20 or 30 minutes, and then I’d like to speak with Sage.”

Feeling it more than hearing it or seeing it, Luke noticed her swallow and shrink back even as she forced her head upward. He stepped closer to her and put his arm around her as he bent to her ear. “Nothing to worry about. I brought my brass knuckles in case he gets out of line.”

That caused her to laugh despite the palpable fear surrounding her, and once again she was breathing.

“And then, finally, I’d like to do a session with all three of us. Just to see where we are and where we would like to go from here.”

No one protested, so after a minute, the pastor nodded. “Okay. Then we can get started.”

However, before they moved more than an inch, Luke spoke up. “Uh, Pastor, not to, you know, step on any toes or anything, but could you maybe say some words, a prayer, you know, so we know God’s here with us?”

He felt the look she gave him, but he didn’t look down just held the pastor’s gaze with his sincerity.

“I think that’s a great idea.”

A breath and all five of them came together.

“Lord,” Pastor Steve said, “we come before You today humbly and in need of miracles. Miracles in our thinking and in our hearts, in ourselves and between each other. We ask that You guide us in the path of healing and wholeness so that all those whose lives intertwine with ours will be profoundly affected for the good from this day forward. Amen.”

“Amen,” they all said.

Backing up, the pastor looked at her father. “Gregory?”

One nod and they headed off to the office.

Why the swimmy headed thing had to attack Sage at all the worst moments, she would never know, but it hit now with a vengeance. Carefully she sat on the blue couch with the small pink flowers but just on the edge and making sure to keep her chin up and her hands perfectly still in her lap. Thinking through, blinking through the situation, part of her said she should not have asked Luke. Her dad and the pastor were clearly taken off guard by his arrival, and he wasn’t even going to be allowed into the discussions. More to the point, she should have been able to handle this on her own. Why had she thought otherwise?

“If you two don’t mind,” Mrs. Mitchell said, “I have some dishes to do.”

“Oh, no,” Luke said. “Don’t mind us. We’ll be fine.”

“Okay.” With one more look, she went through the other doorway.

When she was gone, Sage fought against the swimmy-headedness swirling around her. It was getting much worse.

“So,” Luke finally said from the spot he had chosen both behind and to the side of her on the couch, “wanna tell me what’s up with this whole get-up?”

Anger slashed into her as she spun on him. “Get-up? My outfit?”

Face open and questioning, he nodded. “You look like you’re going to negotiate world peace or something.”

That angered her further. “If you haven’t noticed, this is an important meeting. I could hardly show up looking like a sea monkey.”

He lifted his chin and his eyebrows. “A sea monkey, huh? Okay.” That settled between them as he scratched his chin, and then slowly he sat forward and rubbed his hands together. “You know, I get it.”

“Get what?” Defensive annoyance crawled out of her. “What do you get?”

“You.” And his gaze came over to hers reading the whole story in her eyes with one glance.

Sage ducked, but she knew it was too late.

“And I guess I don’t blame you none, hiding like that. I mean it’s a good con.”

The anger was starting to mix with the swimmy-headed thing in a dangerous, precarious combination.

“It is,” he continued as he rubbed his hands together, “puts you up here.” He lifted one hand to eye level. “And it puts everybody else down here.” He put the other hand near waist level. “Tells everybody loud and clear that you’re important and special, and it totally keeps them at arms’ length.”

Sage gritted her teeth, determined that he would not make her cry here. He of all people knew how important that was to her, how afraid she was of breaking down. Why was he doing this now?

“And everybody buys it,” he said as if he had no clue what he was doing to her. “Everybody falls for Sage Hollywood, and as long as that pedestal stays standing, it works.”

“I don’t want to be on a pedestal. You know that.”

“Do I?” His eyes dug into hers. “More importantly, do you?”

She had no answer for that other than wanting to scream at him, but she would not do that here. There were people here, important people, people she would not disappoint. “I don’t see anything wrong with wanting to look nice.”

“Nice, yes.” He nodded. “Princess of Iceland? Not so much.”

“You have got some nerve.” Spinning, she stood and took a step away from him, going nowhere because there was nowhere to go. The satin blouse was in severe danger of becoming hopelessly and forever wrinkled by her arms latched in front of her, but she couldn’t get herself to care enough about that to release them. Her arms and her spirit wouldn’t let her.

His breath behind her was soft but audible. “Sage, I love you. You know that, but this isn’t you. This is an act. A very good act. One I know you’re holding onto for really good reasons.” And then he was right there beside her, turning her, and lifting her gaze to meet his. “But it’s not you.”

As the tears stung her eyes, the anger returned. “I’m trying here. I’m doing my best. Why can you not see that?”

The laugh and smile were breath soft. “Oh, I see that perfectly.” Then his face softened even more. “Believe me, I know how hard you’re trying.” He pulled her into his arms although she never unwrenched her arms from in front of her. A second, a breath, and he released her, putting his hands on her arms. “Do you like… being this?” His gaze slid up and over her before coming back to rest on hers.

There were those tears again, and she exhaled them down with force. “I know you don’t understand, but this is me. This is who I’m supposed to be.”

Frustration poured across his face as he put his head down and shook it. “Darlin’…”

“No. Luke.” She squeezed her eyes closed, forcing the tears not to fall. When she opened them again, it was with hard determination. “I can’t be the other Sage, not today, not here, not like this.”

“Like what?”

“Like.” She picked her hand up. “In there, with them. I might not be able to do it anyway. If they thought…”

“If they thought what, Sage? What do you think people think of the real you?”

Her gaze came up to his, and she let go of the fight to hold the tears. “That she’s a total disappointment.” She shook her head and dropped her gaze. “I want Dad to be proud of me. I mean, I know, he’ll never be proud of me like he is of Jaycee. I get that, but I at least don’t want him to have to apologize for me. Oh, that’s Sage. She’s not very bright, but at least she looks okay.”

Luke let out the air in one whoosh and put his hand to his head. “That’s really what you think, isn’t it?”

Petulant annoyance spread across her face. “It’s the truth.”

“No. It’s not, Sage. It’s not in any way, shape, or form even a distant relative of the truth.” He took her hand and led her back to the couch only this time he chose to sit right next to her. “Ice Princess or not, you are the most gorgeous girl I’ve ever laid eyes on. And Ice Princess or not, you could go in there and blow them away with your smarts and your kindness and your spirit.” His gaze swept over her again, and he knew then. “And you know what? I don’t even care. If the Ice Princess thing makes you feel less vulnerable, then I guess I’ll just have to put on my gloves and deal with it.”

Taking her in his arms, he pulled her back with him against the couch. “But just so you know, either way, you are completely amazing. And as for your dad, I think he’s starting to figure that out.”

At that moment the two older men came through the doorway, still talking softly. A nod and her father went to sit in one of the chairs flanking the couch. The pastor stood in the doorway as she sat up, swiping at her eyes and fighting to get back into perfect mode.

“Sage?”

Her gaze jumped to the other two there, and fear snaked through her. Pushing that down, she wobbled to her feet, wishing she hadn’t worn the high heels. They might well pitch her into the floor as unsteady as she felt. “Sir,” she said, and it squeaked out.

“Please.” He held his hand out in front of him for her to pass.

Licking her lips, she fought to stay vertical because dizzy was taking over. The inside of her heart thudded to life, and her breathing clawed its way out of her chest. Settle, Sage. Settle down. Just stay calm.

They had been sitting there in silence for several minutes with Luke saying every prayer he knew and many he didn’t, hoping she was all right and that she hadn’t already run out the front door. He knew her nerves were one wrong move away from fraying completely, and really he couldn’t blame her. He couldn’t imagine being back there, in that room, expected to spill your guts out because everyone else thought you should.

Suddenly he began to beg forgiveness for putting her in this position. First talking with the pastor and then her dad... If he had just kept his mouth shut, she wouldn’t be going through this right now.

“I wanted to tell you thanks,” her father said, cracking through the silence like a shot, and Luke sat forward in surprise.

“Thanks?”

“For last night. I know you weren’t expecting to walk in on World War III.”

Luke shrugged. “Never know what I’m going to get when I come over anymore. It’s World War III more than it isn’t.”

Across the way, her father shook his head. “I should have done something right away. I knew Em… I knew it wasn’t going well.”

This one piece had always baffled Luke. “If you don’t mind my asking, why didn’t you?”

Her father regarded him and then dropped his gaze. “Because I’m a coward, because I’d already hurt her so much and I knew how much this was killing her.”

“Mrs. Lawrence? You’re talking about Mrs. Lawrence?”

“Yeah. About Em.” The older man couldn’t hold his gaze though he tried. “I think after we patched things up, we both just buried this stuff. A couple times we had Sage out, but she was really little. Tiny little thing. And we only had her for a week or so at a time. The last time she came… I don’t know, it was like it was so hard on everyone. It just seemed easier to stop having her.”

Luke squinted into that information. “Was that before or after her mom got married?”

Her father exhaled. “After, I think. Why?”

The question spun in Luke’s head, around and around as fear told him he was crazy to ask it. “Have you ever met him? Her stepdad I mean?”

For a moment, her father didn’t move. Then he shook his head. “We always said we should get together, meet each other, but it never happened. They were all the way out in California, and… Not that any of us probably even wanted to, to be honest with you. I don’t know. It never happened, and it wasn’t until now that I thought that was a bad thing.”

“Why now?”

“Because I just wonder if it would’ve made this easier, if we could’ve handled this better.”

“This… meaning?”

“This visit, having her here.”

“She’s trying, you know,” Luke said in her defense.

Her father nodded but said nothing.

Luke knew there was a line here somewhere, but it was fuzzy and kept moving in front of him. “She doesn’t know how to be around you.”

Her father’s gaze came up to his. “Be? What do you mean?”

“I mean, she doesn’t know how to be around you, who to be around you.”

“I’m not following.”

Right or wrong, he was going for broke because someone needed to say it. “She needs you, Sir. She doesn’t always know it, but she does. That other guy, Jason. He must be a real piece of work. I don’t know the whole story, but he’s got her all tied up in knots about being this perfect little porcelain figurine. So she puts on the make-up and the clothes…”

“Trying to be perfect.”

Luke nodded. “When the truth is, she’s scared out of her mind about what everyone is thinking about her and saying about her.”

“And she’s right.”

He couldn’t disagree. “Some of them. But she can’t live like this. It’s not living. It’s trying desperately not to get smashed. I know when you look at her, it’s easy to think she’s this put-together egotistical brat, but none of that is real. I’ve never seen anybody as good at hiding what’s real as she is.”

A shake of his head and her father sat back. “This is all so frustrating. I want to help her. I do. And I want to help Em. I want to help Jaycee and Ryder. But I don’t know how to fix any of it.” He sat forward and put his head in his hands. “It’s just such a mess.”

Although he had wanted to be mad at the man, Luke found he just couldn’t be. He really was a good guy, a little mixed up, but Luke couldn’t fault him for that. He wasn’t exactly the most together guy on the planet either. “You know, when I talked to the pastor the other day, he said that God can do miracles. If this mess needs a miracle, then maybe only God can fix it.”

“Man, I sure hope so because I’m hitting a brick wall every time I try. No matter what I do, it’s wrong.”

“Well, at least you’re doing something. Who knows, maybe it’s doing more good than you realize.”

“So you didn’t know about your mom and dad, how that all happened until recently?” Pastor Steve asked, his pen touched to the little yellow notepad.

“No, Sir.” Sage kept her gaze on her fingers on her lap. It was safer that way. So far, they’d covered her general living situation in California—Mom and Jason, no siblings, her high school experience—senior, not sure where she would go to college, her perception of why she had come here, her life since she’d been living with the Lawrences, and only now were they getting into the truly intimidating part of the story.

“You never asked, were never curious?”

She felt like the ditzy blonde she knew he thought she was. “Mom just said my dad had gone back home when I was little. I guess I never thought to question it.”

He made a note of that, which she didn’t like at all. She was failing this test, miserably.

“But you came here, when you were small?”

“I did, but it was more like visiting your second cousin from the other side of the family.”

“So the concept of them being your family…”

She lifted both shoulders. “They were my family. He was my dad. I never really thought about it.” Anger and panic were coming up, and she let out a long breath to silence them.

“And how have things been since you found out? Good, bad, difficult?”

“Oh.” She giggled softly. “Well, I think we were all trying to make it work, keep walking and hope we make it to August in one piece.”

“And you were happy with that? With the arrangement? You didn’t want to go back home?”

The maze forked in two different directions, and Sage couldn’t tell which way was the safest. “I… Well,… I mean…”

“It’s okay, Sage, there are no right and wrong answers here. I’m just trying to figure out where we are so we can formulate a plan for how to go forward.”

If she said she had wanted to go home, they might send her there now. If she said she hadn’t ever wanted to go home, she would be lying. Lying was bad. She knew that. Lying to a preacher was worse. She knew that even more. Her nerves started taking over the conversations colliding in her head. “I’m sorry. Um, what was the question again?” She reached up and splayed her fingers onto the slicked back hairstyle and a flash of Luke holding her and telling her it was going to be all right surged into her consciousness. He was wrong. Oh, so very wrong. Her heart told her that now, slamming into her ribs like a bass drum gone mad.

Pastor Steve regarded her for a long moment, and Sage began to feel the sweat beads form under her blouse. No way would she pull it away from her, but doing that would surely feel good. She knew now how a microbe felt under a microscope—exposed and unprotected. It was a horrible feeling.

“Sage, this is not an interrogation. No one is on trial or guilty here. We’re just trying to figure out who is where with this thing.”

She nodded, hearing him but not at all believing him. “I know. And I want to help. I do. They’re a nice family. I want to help them.”

“They’re your family, Sage.”

The words smacked her spirit like a punch, and it took her breath away. She squeezed her eyes closed both to keep the scream and the tears inside of her. If she just took in small breaths, that would help.

“They are. Your dad…”

Buzzing started in her ears, blocking out everything else. She didn’t want to hear what he was saying. He didn’t know, didn’t understand. Why had she come? Why couldn’t she just leave? She wanted to leave, but leaving meant going back, and going back meant...

The talking, his talking stopped.

“I’ll tell you what, why don’t we take a little break? Get something to drink. Stretch our legs a bit.” He stood, and Sage did too, and the wobbly thing was now much worse. She held onto the chair arm to keep from meeting up unceremoniously with the floor.

Afraid of the sentence he was about to pronounce on her when they went into the living room, Sage forced herself upright, lifted her chin and beat back the tears. Small breaths, Sage. Small breaths. She followed him to the door and out into the hallway. “I’m sorry, Pastor,” she said softly. “Truly.”

“There’s nothing to be sorry about.” He let her go first, and she broke into the living room once again feeling like that microbe when her father and Luke looked up.

Luke stood instantly and came over to her, gazing at her with incredible volumes of concern. “What happened?”

She looked up at him and very, very nearly cracked. Just like that, he put his arms around her and she latched onto him, praying he would never make her stand on her own again. Squashing it all down was becoming impossible, but she sniffed trying very hard to do just that. However, Luke backed up and his gaze asked questions his mouth didn’t.

“Would you like something to drink before we start again, Greg?” the pastor asked her father who stumbled through an answer Sage didn’t hear.

More? They were going to do more? She couldn’t take any more. No. She wanted out now.

“Come here.” Luke took her hand and together they turned and went back down the hallway. Nearly to the office he stopped, turned to her and leveled his gaze on her. “Okay, talk to me, Sage. What’s going on?”

“I… can’t,” she squeezed out of her heart. “I can’t do this.”

“Why not?”

“I can’t talk… to them.” Now she was shaking her head as if she could dislodge it from her shoulders. “Not like this. Not the two of them. Not together.” Her eyes came up to his and suddenly she knew if she could convince him, she wouldn’t have to. “Don’t make me. Please. Don’t make me talk to them, not like this, not alone. Please.”

In an all-out battle with himself to figure out what was going on and what to do about it, Luke spun through the options in his mind. “Listen, I know you don’t want to, darlin’, but…”

“No. No, I don’t. I don’t want to. I can’t.” She was clutching his collar now, quietly slipping off into hysteria.

“Why not? Sage. Stop.” He took hold of both her shoulders and shook her gently. “Just stop.”

However, when her gaze came up to his, fear like he’d never seen twisted there. “They can’t know.”

“Can’t know what?”

Her eyes pleaded with him to do something, but Luke couldn’t tell what monster they were facing anymore. They seemed to be everywhere, one more dangerous than the last.

“Okay, come here,” he finally said, and gently he took her into the pastor’s office and over to the couch where he sat down and pulled her down with him. Once down, she huddled into his arms, like a turtle in a shell when it’s threatened. He reached for something solid in his heart. “Look, I know this is scary for you. I get that, but they need to know what’s going on so they can help you.”

One sniff. That’s all it took to tell him they were once again treading in the shards of her brokenness. “Don’t you get it? They can’t help. No one can.”

“Well, they surely can’t if you won’t even let them try.”

She picked her head up, and it frightened him to the core that there were no tears there. “You have a family, right?”

He couldn’t argue with that. “Yeah, I do.”

“Well, I don’t. Okay? Not like yours.” She sat forward away from him. Her head fell, and she shook it slowly. “My families… one doesn’t want me, and the other one…”

Twice now, Luke had gotten the feeling that this was about more than the Lawrences’ situation. He slowed his breathing, preparing for whatever she was going to tell him because he knew it was bad, deep bad, the kind of bad that makes you know you shouldn’t ever talk to anyone about it. “Sage, darlin’, whatever it is, you can say it. I want to know.”

She let out a long breath and nodded. “Things haven’t…” The words yanked to a stop, and she mashed her lips together and shook her head violently. Putting her hand to her head, she rubbed it there like she could press whatever it was out of her brain.

Helplessly Luke watched her falling apart. It was killing him, but he knew no other way than to go through it.

“At home, in California.” She yanked her hand down to her lap and exhaled very slowly. “Things at home are not… They’re not the way they’re supposed to be.”

Lifting his hand, he put it gently on her back. “Okay. Then how are they?”

“My mom.” It was crazy how slowly words could come.

With each and every one he wondered if he would ever get to hear another.

“She…” Sage sat there, just breathing, closing her eyes as if imagining whatever she wasn’t saying. “When I was little, it was just parties and things. Lots of parties. All the time. They went out a lot. Like a lot, a lot. And then she started drinking at home, like wine for dinner, and something when she got home, and then before dinner and then sometimes in the morning.”

Understanding came over him, and Luke’s hand drifted over her. “Does Jason know?”

This laugh was bitter and ironic, and she wiped her nose with her wrist. “Jason doesn’t care about anyone but Jason.”

That much Luke had already surmised.

Then her gaze fell, dragging her neck along with it. She hunched over, her elbows now on her thighs. He watched her, praying she would finally put this down whatever it was.

“One time.” And once again the words slowed to a stop-and-go crawl. “When I was 15…” Her whole body bobbed forward and back, swaying there in the sunshine streaming in from the window. “Mom was gone on a trip. She did that a lot. She… does that… a lot. I was staying at Pate’s house for the weekend, and I’d forgotten something… my swimsuit or some shoes or something. I don’t even remember anymore.”

This breath was hard and ragged, and she sniffed again. Her head shook slowly, barely, side-to-side. “I had a key, of course, and I know he didn’t know I was coming home.” The words were getting slower, the memories harder to remember. “I came in the front door, and there was this trail… of clothes. It went right from the front door into the living room. I heard them in there, and I knew it wasn’t Mom. I knew…”

Luke’s eyes fell closed as he processed the unbelievable moment she had somehow survived.

“When Mom got home, I told her everything, what he was doing, what I heard, what I saw. I told her, and she said that she wasn’t stupid. That’s what she said to me, ‘I’m not stupid, Sage.’ I couldn’t believe it. It was like she didn’t even care… She told me to never tell anybody, that they wouldn’t understand. I wanted to leave. I told her I wanted to leave, that I didn’t want to be there anymore. I didn’t want to be there when she was gone, and I didn’t want to be there when she wasn’t gone…” Sage lowered her head all the way into her hands. “One time I came home from school, and I found her passed out in the kitchen. I didn’t know what to do. I thought she was dead. But she wasn’t.” Sage collapsed forward, putting her face into her hands. “If anybody ever found out… If anybody knew…”

“So you never told anyone?”

She tipped her head and stopped there like a raging hurricane that someone just paused. “Only once. One night I told Mac when we were up real late telling secrets. I told her about Jason, about finding him that night.” Then the fight left her, and Luke heard the breath of acceptance. “She told me I should’ve joined them I might have learned something.”

“Oh, my… Sage, darlin’.” Luke pulled her back into his arms and held her there. “Darlin’ none of that was your fault. None of it.”

However, she nodded, bumping into his shoulder. “Yes. Yes, it was.”

“What? How? How could that possibly have had anything to do with you?”

Looking up at him with those same hysterical eyes, Sage’s gaze drilled into his soul. “Because Mom told me it was. She said we had to stay, we couldn’t leave because she wanted me to have everything she never did. She wanted me to have the life she never had, and the only way we could do that was if we stayed.”

“Everything okay in here?” The pastor appeared at the door, and horrified, Sage dove into Luke’s embrace and huddled there.

He let his gaze fall to her, and he thought through everything. They had to tell them, to figure out how to get her out of there, how to protect her. “Uh, yeah,” he finally said to the pastor. “Can you give us another minute?”

Pastor Steve nodded. “Sure. We’ll just be in here.”

“Okay.”

When he left, Luke held her as he thought through everything she had told him. “Sage? Darlin’?”

She was breathing. That was good. But that was also it.

“We have to tell them. Okay? They need to know.”

The intake of air was six jerky breaths followed by gasps and pauses.

“Sage, they aren’t going to judge you. They want to help.”

Her head shook slowly. “I’m not supposed to tell. I’m not supposed to say anything.”

That pulled up his fighting spirit, and it crushed the fear in him. “Don’t talk. Don’t tell. Don’t say anything. Don’t you see, Sage? It’s a trap. If you don’t talk about this, if you don’t tell somebody, you’re stuck.”

“They don’t want anyone to know.”

“Of course they don’t. Would you?”

“No.” The word was soft, nearly inaudible.

“But we can’t fix this by pretending it doesn’t exist.”

“It’s okay. It is. I’ve only got one more year. By next year…”

The thought shook him to the core. “No. Sage. We’ve got to tell them. We’ve got to get you out of there. I don’t want you going back…”

Pulling herself up, she shivered and shrugged away from him. “I shouldn’t have said anything. I shouldn’t have told you.”

Slowly and carefully, Luke slid off the couch and knelt in front of her, taking her hands in his. “I love you. You know that, right?”

A second and she nodded.

“Okay, that means I’m not going to sit here and watch you get thrown to the wolves. Not the wolves here, and definitely not the ones back in California.”

Sage tipped her head clearly fighting the tears.

“I’m not.” He gripped her hands tighter. “This whole don’t tell anyone thing, it dies here. Right here. Right now. Today. Now, we’re going to go in there, you and me, and we’re going to face this thing, and we’re going to get help.”

Her gaze came up to his, confusion clawing there.

However, solid had never felt so unbreakable as it did in his chest at that moment. “Do you trust me?” He wasn’t at all sure how she would answer that question.

She blinked, searched his eyes, and blinked again before she nodded.

“Okay. Good.” He leveled his gaze on her so she would have no doubt of his sincerity. “And I trust them.”

A tiny gasp in, but she never let go of his eyes.

“Can we do this together? You and me?”

The nearly imperceptible nod never made it an inch, but he would take it.

Chapter 28

Sage held onto him as they went from the office into the living room. She couldn’t look up, couldn’t face anyone. It was him and him alone that was keeping her walking and in one piece. She trusted him. Everything else was a blur.

“Sweetheart?” her father said, standing from his chair, and the pastor stood from the couch.

Luke held up his hand to stop their questions, and then he looked down at her, huddled in his arms. “You okay?”

Slowly she nodded as the emotions swayed like a rope bridge in the wind, dangling beneath her.

“Okay. Let’s sit here.” Taking the pastor’s place as he went around to the other chair, Luke led her over to the couch.

“Do we want to do this in my office?” Pastor Steve asked.

But Luke looked up at him never faltering in his movement as he got them both onto the couch. “No. I think this is good.”

The two older men exchanged glances and acquiesced.

Breathe, Sage. Just breathe.

“There are some things I think you both need to know,” Luke said, his voice far more stable than Sage’s would ever have been.

I trust you, Luke. I trust you. Dear God, please let this be the right thing to do.

“You both know about all the issues here.” He looked from one man to the other. “And I think those have to be dealt with too. But there are some things, things I didn’t know until just now, that I think we really need your help with.”

This exchange of glances contained even more concern.

“Okay,” Pastor Steve said for both of them.

Her life was now in his hands. He could trash it, crush it, destroy it. Tears stung her eyes as she rewound through everything she had told him. She let her eyes go closed. Life after this moment would be over.

“Well,” Luke started and glanced down at her, “the whole California thing is pretty much a mess too.”

“How do you mean?” the pastor asked.

Once more Luke looked down at her, and Sage knew he was going to say no more without her permission. She had to let go and trust him. Finally, she nodded with a sigh. Right or wrong, she was going to trust him with even this.

Luke’s gaze came up and went over to her father’s. “Did you know that Sage’s mom has a drinking problem?”

Her father’s eyes jumped in surprise. “Drinking? I mean, I knew she drank some.”

“No. I’m not talking social drinking. I’m talking about passing out in the kitchen. I’m talking Sage gets there from school and can’t wake her up.”

“Sage?” The worry in her father’s eyes took hold of her. “Is that true?”

What would be the point of lying? She lifted her chin and nodded even as she lowered her eyes. What they would think of her from now on. It hurt to even think about that.

“And there’s more,” Luke said, charging through the army surrounding them. “Her stepdad, Jason. He has women over to the house. She’s walked in on them before.”

“Wh…?” the pastor said, the surprise overtaking his decorum.

They knew now. It was pointless to hide. Eyes closed, Sage sat up from Luke’s side, but his arm never left from around her.

“Mom goes on trips,” she said, slowly with broken edges surrounding the words. “She’s gone a lot. When she goes, Jason has… Well, he has girlfriends come over. I don’t know them. I’ve never really met them.”

“While you’re there?” her father asked, shifting in his chair in concern.

Sage shrugged. “He thought I wasn’t.” She glanced at Luke. “But I’ve driven by, after he thought I was gone. There’s always a car. A different car.”

Stricken, her father looked to the pastor, and he shook his head. A second and his gaze traced back over to hers. “Sage, I never knew…”

“No,” she cut him off. “I know. You didn’t. Nobody did. I wasn’t supposed to say anything.”

“Don’t tell,” the pastor said, and he looked at Luke who nodded. A pause, and the pastor sat forward on the chair. “Sage, I want you to know that there are a lot of people who live with shame just like this their whole lives. What you’ve done today, telling us, reaching out like this, it’s very, very brave.” He glanced at her father. “And I can assure you that we will do whatever we can in order to protect you. You have my word on that.”

She nodded, not at all sure she believed him, but tired of fighting.

The pastor thought through some things and then sighed. “Well, at least we know where we are now.” He looked at her father. “We might not like it much, but it’s really hard to do something about something that no one will face.” The words stopped for a moment. “If you don’t mind, I’d like to share a few things with y’all that won’t fix anything but might be a place to start.”

When he didn’t continue, her father said, “Please, Pastor. We want to hear whatever you have to say.”

“Okay, then.” Pastor Steve sat forward, no pen, no paper, not even a Bible or a therapy manual. “Well, I have been doing this minister thing for a while now, and one thing I can tell you with no reservations is that God specializes in broken people. He’s not here to judge you or to condemn you or to throw you into hell. In fact, I think He’s here to rescue you from the hell you’re already in.”

Her father laughed softly at that. “Good luck with that.”

“Believe me, I hear where you’re coming from, Gregory, but this is going to take something a lot more powerful than luck.” He sat back. “Remember that reading, the one Luke read that day.” He looked over. “That was you, right? The Corinthians one about love?”

Luke nodded.

“Yeah, I thought so. You know the one that goes, ‘Love is patient. Love is kind. Love is not jealous, it does not put on airs’?” He said the words as if he was reading them though he had nothing in his hands. “I think it’s important to understand that God doesn’t rely on luck. He relies on what He is… love. God’s love is amazing, incredible, all-powerful. It has the power to heal and to forgive and to mend those places in us that we thought no one would ever want to even see much less work with.

“The world says, ‘Don’t tell.’  God says, ‘Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.’ The world says, what we see is what is real. God says, ‘Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see.’ The world says this situation is hopeless. God says, ‘For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.’ Those aren’t random promises. Those are promises from the God who is love, the God Who wants to heal us with His love because He wants us to live not just survive. He wants us to be so forgiven so that we go out and sing from the rooftops about what He’s done for us, no longer chained to the ground by our sin or by the sins of others around us.”

“Those are all nice words, Reverend,” her father said. “But how do we do that?”

The pastor nodded and smiled. “Well, why don’t you ask Luke that question?”

“Me?” Luke sat up in panic. “Why would you ask me?”

When Pastor Steve’s gaze came to him, it showed up with a smile. “Because that’s exactly what you’ve been doing, isn’t it?” He nodded at Sage, still ensconced in Luke’s arms. “You’ve been loving Sage.”

“Well, yeah, but…”

“So many people today, young and old, get love mixed up. Maybe it’s the movies they watch or the books they read. I don’t know. But they think of love as something they’re supposed to feel—like rainbows and bunny rabbits and clouds all mixed together. They think it’s what puts a man and a woman in bed together because it feels good. But that’s not love at all. That’s lust if anything. Wanting another person for your own pleasure, using them to satisfy your own flesh. But that’s not love, is it, Luke?”

He tightened his grip on her. “No.”

“Then what is it?”

As Luke looked down at her, he knew it was so, so much more than that. “It’s wanting what’s best for them and doing whatever you have to to make that happen. It’s working through all the bad stuff, even if it’s not fun, even if they want to scratch your eyes out for even going there.” His smile brought a small one of hers out as he gazed at her, diving into a love he had never known possible. “It’s knowing everything about them and wanting only to fix the bad stuff and hurt because there’s so much good stuff there if they could only see themselves like you do.”

The pastor nodded. “Right. And that’s the kind of love God wants to give to all of us. It’s the kind of love that can fix things and heal people. It’s the kind of love that doesn’t sit back and hope that things change, but it gets in there and it works for that change—as hard and as uncomfortable as that is sometimes. It’s walking with someone through their tragedies and through their struggles and pain, sometimes not even so you can fix them, but sometimes just because you can’t imagine leaving them alone to have to deal with something like that.”

And then like a butterfly emerging from a cocoon, Sage sat forward, sniffed, and lifted her gaze. “Can I say something?”

Deep gentleness touched the pastor’s eyes and Luke’s heart. “Sure, Sage. Please.”

She let out a breath and thought through the words. “When I came here, I had this image of myself, and I thought it was perfect. I thought I was so much better than everyone else because I was from California, and I had money and nice clothes. But the longer I was here and the more I was with Luke.” She reached over and put her hand on his knee as she half-laughed. “The more I started to see that that image was just that an image—like a mirage, or like looking into a mirror at a reflection that wasn’t even real. And that scared me to death because I started realizing I didn’t want anyone to know what was real.

“Because real meant the truth, and I didn’t want anyone to know the truth about me, about my life, about anything.” Her gaze went over to her father’s. “Yesterday, in your office, I didn’t want you to know the truth. I didn’t want anyone to know the truth about me, about how things are in my life, but I’m starting to see the lie that really is. When I got up this morning and put this on …” She floated her hand down over herself. “It was about going back there, into the lies, into the image so you wouldn’t…”

“See what was real,” her father finished for her, and she nodded.

“The truth is I’m not proud of what I am. I’m not,” she said slowly. “I know what people say about me. I know what you all thought about me. But I also know that’s not real.” The breath raised and released her shoulders. “What’s real is I just want everyone to love me. I want them to think I’m a good person who is worth something more than taking out on Friday night or showing off to their buddies. I want to wear jeans with rips in them if I want and go to the thrift store just because it’s fun, and I want to go hiking and fishing. Okay, maybe not fishing, but I want to go out with the family and do things together. I want to sit on the blanket at the fireworks with y’all and watch Ryder chase the girls. I want…” Her words slowed as the tears came. “I want to be a part of a real family. I want my picture up on the mantel and to be in the one above it.” The tears twined through her words. “And I want you to yell at Luke about he’d better bring me home safely or you’ll eat him alive.”

“Ha. Ha.” Luke’s fingers brushed her back. “Okay. Let’s not get carried away there.”

But she just looked back at him, feeling the chains fall from her spirit. “I want it all. I’m tired of living in the mirror and trying to convince myself that’s all I deserve. I know I’m messed up. I get that. But I don’t want to be anymore.”

“You’re broken,” the pastor said softly, and her gaze went over to him. “We all are. We all have chips and dings and imperfections. But God doesn’t see us for those things. He sees those things as what makes us priceless. You know, you mentioned the discount store.”

Sage nodded.

“I love to go antiquing. It’s one of my favorite hobbies. My wife would tell you it’s one of my vices.” He smiled at that. “There are a lot of people who look for stuff in the antique shops, stuff that’s in pristine condition, things they think the world will want to buy from them—things that are worth something.” The pastor stood from his seat and walked over to the small shelf on the side. He lifted something off and brought it over. “When I go antiquing, and I don’t go very often because I can’t afford all the stuff I seem to want to bring home, I get things like this.”

He handed the item to Sage.

“It’s a tea cup,” she said in surprise and confusion.

He smiled at that and nodded down to it. “What else?”

As she examined it, her finger brushed rough spots on the bottom and the side. She turned it and found two small chips where someone had obviously dropped it. “It’s chipped.”

“Yes. It is. Okay, so here’s the question I ask myself every time I see that chipped tea cup sitting up there.” He looked right at her. “Why did whoever owned it not just throw it away? It wasn’t part of a set. It was just one, lone, chipped tea cup.”

She gulped, wanting to give him the right answer but not fully understanding the point he was getting at. “Because they thought they could get something for it?”

The pastor shrugged, nodded, and retrieved it from her. “Maybe.” He went back over and placed it just so on the shelf. “Or maybe, they couldn’t bear to throw it away. Maybe they loved it so much, they thought, ‘Someone else might still see the value we see in it.’  You see, I think God is like those owners. I think He refuses to throw us away, no matter how many chips, and how many cracks, and how many damages we get in this life. I think He’s determined to hold onto us because we are valuable to Him. He doesn’t throw us away because of the chips, and what He wants most of all is for us to start seeing each other with the love He sees us with. He wants us to value ourselves the way He values us—chips and all. So I keep that up there to remind me. People are cracked. They are messy, and often to the world, they really aren’t worth much of anything. But to God…” He pointed and looked up. “God doesn’t give up on us. He loves us with a love that is patient enough to walk with us through the things that have chipped us; He is kind enough to lovingly keep us and hold us even when the world says we’re not worth it.”

“Even when we’ve done really stupid things that have hurt a lot of people?” her father asked, and Sage realized he was hearing these words on the same level she was.

“The chips and cracks happen in a lot of ways,” the pastor said. “Sometimes they are our own doing; sometimes they are what others have done to us. How they got there doesn’t matter as much as knowing that God loves all of us in spite of, or maybe even because of those chips. He doesn’t turn His face from the chips and the cracks. He knows those things have taught us more than perfection ever could.”

“I don’t… I don’t understand,” her father said.

The pastor came and sat back on the chair. “Gregory, do you know the story of King David?”

“Uh, yeah… David and Goliath, Saul, the guy who wrote the psalms.”

“Right.” The pastor nodded and glanced at the two on the couch. “And he’s also the one who slept with Bathsheba.”

That sent her father back into the chair. “Bathsheba. The guy’s wife.”

“Yes, Uriah’s wife, the one David then sent to the front lines so he would be killed. Why?”

Her father’s glance was hesitant. “Because she was pregnant with David’s child.”

“Yes.” The pastor nodded and folded his hands in front of him. “First, David ordered Uriah to come home, thinking nature would take its course and no one would ever know what he had done. But Uriah was following orders, and he refused to sleep with her. So when David ordered him back to the front lines, Uriah was killed, and David’s sin was exposed.”

“Sounds familiar.”

“Oh, yeah, the Bible’s really good at that. See we think of the Bible as a book of exceptions. That these people were paragons of virtue and holiness. The truth is the Bible is filled with people just like us—struggling, mistake-prone sinners who get it wrong a whole lot more than we ever get it right. Moses killed someone. Peter had major anger issues. Jonah denied God’s calling and fled to get away from Him. Judas betrayed Jesus. Job lost everything. Rebekah lied. And David, the one God had hand-chosen to lead His people, sinned with a woman who was not his wife.

“But see, here’s where the story gets interesting because in our view we know what should come next. We think that God would smite David down, send him out of the palace to go live with the sheep again, but when we read it, we find out He didn’t do that at all. In fact, God actually did something quite surprising.”

Sage’s whole spirit said, What?

“If we follow the genealogy, we learn that Solomon, the one who took over the throne from his father David was a child of…”

It couldn’t be!

The pastor nodded as recognition traced across the faces there. “Solomon, the great and wise king was the son of David and Bathsheba. They had gotten married, and they had Solomon. And it gets even better. The lineage of Jesus traces back to David through the linage of King Solomon. So that means, God took what David had done, and in His abundant forgiveness and love, brought ultimate good, Jesus Christ, into the world. Now, that says to me that God’s love can undo and redo and fix and right and heal things that to us bring us nothing but shame and reproach and disgrace. His grace can cover and does cover our disgrace. And then, we are allowed and freed to tell the world what He’s done in our lives—how He set us free so that others can see what He’s done and maybe inspire them to take a step to bringing into the light their own chips and cracks and failures.”

Luke wasn’t sure what anyone else felt, but his whole being relaxed as if the storm was finally passing. “So I guess that’s the answer then. Give it to God and let Him love us through this.”

Pastor Steve nodded. “And we do our best to keep loving each other like that chipped teacup.”

Well, that part would be easy.

Leaving the pastor’s house, Sage kept her arm around Luke’s waist in case he had any thought of getting away. They needed to talk, and she didn’t want to do it with witnesses.

“Can Luke bring me home?” she asked her father who stopped by his car door.

A second and a small smile, and he put out his hand, which Luke took to shake. “Drive safely, you hear me? No hot-rodding or drag-racing. Have her home at a reasonable hour, and don’t even think about doing anything you wouldn’t want me and God to see you do.”

Sage wound her lips under her teeth and bit them hard to keep from laughing as she looked up at Luke who looked like he’d been punched.

“Uh, yes, Sir. No problem, Sir. We’ll go right home. I promise.”

Her father nodded and gripped Luke’s hand. “Just want to make sure we’re clear on that.”

Luke nodded as well. “Yes, Sir. Fully and one-hundred percent clear.”

“Good.” Then he leaned over to Sage and gave her a kiss on the forehead. When he backed up, he leveled his gaze on her. “You have my number?”

“Your…? Oh. Uh. N-no. I don’t think I do.”

He nodded seriously and stood there, waiting, hands on hips. “Well, do you want it…?”

“Oh! Y-yeah.” She dug into her small bag and pulled her cell phone free. “Daaaad.” She typed it in slowly. “K.”

In quick succession, he gave her his numbers—house phone, cell phone, work phone, direct line and office line.

“Got it.”

“Good.” His glance went over to and up Luke, who looked like he really was about to get eaten. “Call me if you need anything.”

Sage nodded. “I will.”

When they were safely in the car, Luke looked over at her with wide eyes. “Okay, just for the record, he scares me.”

Funny how safe that made her feel. She reached over and twined her fingers through his. “Have I ever told you how much I love you?”

He quirked his mouth in a smile. “Not half as much as I love you, darlin’. Now what do you say we go and make everyone some supper? After that marathon, I think we could all use some TLC.”

The humor left her, but what remained wasn’t sadness or fear, just a wondering about the unknown now stretched before them. “I sure wish Jaycee and Em could’ve been there today.”

Surprise jumped over to her. “Why’s that?”

“I just see it, you know? I see how hurt they are. I don’t want them to feel like that, like everyone is watching and judging and condemning them because of me.”

“It’s not…”

“No, Luke. It’s okay. I’m not carrying that anymore, but I know they are. And it’s weird because I don’t want this even for me. I don’t want them to be healed or whatever because then maybe they’ll let me into their family. I want them to be free, to feel like God really is on their side and something good really can come out of all of this.”

He glanced over at her. “You believe that now, don’t you?”

She dragged in a breath. “It’s still a mess, don’t get me wrong, and I know my mom is going to go completely ballistic if she ever finds out about today. But yeah, I really believe that God has something in mind. I mean, He has to be on my side, right? He gave me you. What more proof do I need?”

Two bags of groceries in one hand and her hand in the other, and Luke made his way up to their back door. Inside, to announce their arrival, he called, “Knock. Knock.”

The house beyond was quiet. Very quiet. Too quiet.

“Wasn’t Jaycee’s car out there?”

“Yeah,” Sage said, sensing the same thing he was.

Luke put the groceries on the cabinet with a thunk, let go of her hand and headed into the living room. “Jayc? Ryder? Hey! Is anybody here?” A second to listen and he turned back for her. “Nobody’s here.”

“Where are they?”

“I don’t know. Let’s go check out back.”

“I’m right behind you.”

Together, they raced into the yard, Sage heedless of the fact that she was still in her perfection clothes and heels.

“Jaycee!” she called.

“Jayc!” Luke yelled in front of her. “Ryder!” He twisted around. “Her car’s still here.”

The heels hardly slowed her down as she went to the car, opened the driver’s side and came back out. “The keys are here.”

“Jayc!” Luke spun heading back to the house.

“Dad.” Sage ran for the house. “I’m gonna call Dad.”

Luke didn’t look exactly thrilled about the decision, but he didn’t protest either. “Jaycee! Ryder!”

Sage skidded to a stop where she’d left her purse on the cabinet. In one swipe she had the bag in hand, in two more, she had the phone on and it was dialing. “Come on. Come on. Come on.”

“This is Greg.”

“Greg. Dad. Hi. This is Sage.”

“Sage? What’s wrong?”

“Uh.” How do you tell your father that his two children are AWOL? “We just got home, and…”

“I found Ryder!”

The backdoor banged, causing her to jump so hard she nearly dropped the phone. With no pretense, Luke came in, carrying Ryder, and relief poured through Sage.

“How is he? Where was he? Where’s Jaycee?”

“Sage! What is going on?” her father demanded.

“I… I don’t know. We just got home, and…” Her attention whipsawed between the conversation at her ear and the very quiet one going on two feet from her. “We couldn’t find Ryder or Jaycee. But Ryder’s here. He’s fine.” At least she hoped he was fine. He didn’t look exactly fine, arms and legs all draped over Luke and his head down over Luke’s shoulder like that.

“Where’s Jaycee?”

“I don’t… I’m not sure.”

“They did?” Luke was asking Ryder. “Are you sure? How long ago? She left?”

“Left?” Sage asked. “Left where?”

“Sage, what is going on?”

“Hang on, Dad, we’re trying to figure it out.” Her gaze went to Luke who stepped back, looking like someone had hit him with a stun gun. “Luke…?”

His eyes locked with hers. “She’s with Rory.”

Okay, whatever Sage thought he was going to say, that was not it. “Rory? Are you sure?”

“Rory? What about Rory?” her father asked in her ear.

Turning so he shielded Ryder from the conversation, Luke put his hand on his beltline. “He said a red pickup came, and Jaycee got in it and left.”

Horror pounced on Sage. “She left him here alone?” Then she remembered the other conversation. Wow. She did not want to deliver this news. “Um, Dad, it looks like Jaycee went somewhere with Rory Harris.”

“What? Why?”

“I don’t know exactly, but Ryder’s here, and he said she got in a red pickup. We’re guessing it was Rory’s.”

“Let me talk to Luke.”

“Here he is.” She handed the phone to Luke who couldn’t have looked more worried or upset had he tried.

“Hello?” Luke put his hand over his head and walked off into the living room.

It was then that Sage’s attention went to the child, sitting on the counter with his head down. She had no idea how to do this or even what to do, but she had to do something. Lord, show me how. Stepping over to him, she reached up and flipped at his hair. “Hey, buddy. You had us worried there for a minute.”

His eyes came up, big pools of brown sadness. “Is Jaycee in trouble?”

Sage couldn’t help the soft laugh or the smile. “Just like my little brother to be worried about his big sisters.” With that, she lifted him not really making that work so that he more scooted off the cabinet to the floor. “Wow, bro. What are you made of, bricks? I’m gonna have to go work out if you keep growing like that.”

Together they went to the table, and Sage sat there, knowing her lame jokes weren’t going to change the subject.

“Jaycee said I could make a sandwich if I was hungry.”

How many pieces of Sage wanted to use that information against her sister, but she just put a tight smile on her face and looked at him. “I’m not great at anything more challenging than peanut butter and jelly. How does that sound?”

The sadness wafted out of his eyes, replaced by a small light of hope. “Can we do honey?”

Sage tipped her head. “Jelly and honey? That sounds…”

But Ryder laughed. “Not jelly and honey. Peanut butter and honey.”

She wrinkled her nose. “Eek! That sounds positively…” Squelching that, she tried to get the revulsion down in her to stay there. “Hm. Is that any good?”

“It’s awesome.”

“Okay, well, then peanut butter and honey it is.” Getting up, she went over to the refrigerator to search for the ingredients. “Peanut butter? Peanut butter?”

“It’s in the door.”

“Oh, well, so it is.” She retrieved it and turned. “And the honey?”

“In the cabinet.” He pointed to it, just watching her.

“Cabinet and… honey. Boy, you’re good at this. Are you sure I’m supposed to make this for you? Maybe you should be making one for me.”

At that Ryder stood and came over to the counter. They were busily crafting the best peanut butter and honey sandwich ever when Luke strode back in. Not wanting to alarm Ryder who seemed to be returning to normal, Sage caught Luke’s gaze. He looked down at her brother and nodded that he knew.

“I’m just going to…” Luke pointed to the door.

“You okay?”

“Yeah.”

Her eyes searched his, and she felt his worry.

He laid her phone on the counter. “I’ll be back.”

“K. I’ll be praying.”

Luke went out to his car and grabbed up his own phone off the console. They’d mapped out a plan to find her. The first task of which he was not looking forward to, but he did it anyway. “Jayc,” he said under his breath, “you knew everybody was going to freak out, didn’t you? Well, that worked.” He picked the phone up to his ear, wondering if her dad had already gotten through.

“This is Jaycee, please leave a mes…”

He clicked off. Voicemail. Of course.

“Plan B.” His fingers flew over the keys all the way to SEND. “This isn’t a game, Jayc, answer your phone.”

One heartbeat. Three.

“Fine. If you wanna play that way…” He dialed the anger down as he punched in the last number on his short list. It wasn’t a great option, and it certainly wasn’t one he wanted to take, but… “Hello, Mrs. Harris? This is Luke Baker.”

“So where were you?” Sage asked Ryder as he sat devouring the sandwich and milk. “What’d you do when Jaycee left?”

He munched three times, formulating his answer. “At first I was in here, but then it got kind of weird. So I went out in my treehouse.”

“The treehouse, huh? I’ve never been in your treehouse.”

“That’s ‘cause you’re a girl.” He wrinkled up his nose. “No girls.”

“Oh, yeah? Well, girls can be fun too, ya know?”

“No. Girls are all into their hair and their clothes and stuff.”

Sage couldn’t argue, but she was intrigued. Coming over to the table, she sat and watched him. “What else you know about girls?”

“Lots of stuff.”

“Name one.”

“They stink up the bathroom with all the junk they spray so if you don’t use it first, it’s like…” He stuck out his tongue and rolled his eyes back as if he was dying a horrible death.

“Oh, yeah? What else?”

“They never wanna do anything fun like hiking and fishing and baseball.”

She picked her chin up off her hand. “Hey, I like baseball.”

He twisted his mouth. “No, you don’t. You just pretend ‘cause everybody else does.”

“Well, maybe I can learn.”

“No, you’re a girl. Besides, you’d look weird in a baseball cap.”

Strange how she took that as a personal challenge.

The APB worked. Subject found. Major crisis averted.

Father was on his way to pick up his wayward daughter, and Luke was pretty sure at that point, Armageddon would be upon them. He figured he’d better go and warn Sage, but when he went into the back door, he heard the quiet conversation.

“So if I get a baseball hat….”

“Cap.”

“If I get a baseball cap and a bat thingy.”

“Bat. It’s called a bat. Just a bat. Not a bat thingy.”

Luke stifled the laugh as he stood just outside of line of sight and listened.

“I’m guessing you’ve got a ball,” Sage said.

“Of course. Duh.” And Luke could almost hear Ryder’s eyes rolling. “And a glove.”

“Oh, okay. So we’ve got the whole thing then. The bat, the ball, a glove. So you can throw it to me.”

“Pitch.”

“Pitch it to me, and I can hit it.”

“Someone’s going to have to show you. I already know, you’re gonna swing like a girl.”

Crazy how much Luke wanted to be the one to show her. He couldn’t justify listening in without making his presence known, so he stepped in and Ryder looked over at him.

“Tell Sage this is never gonna work.”

“What’s never gonna work?” Luke asked, coming over to the table.

“Her and baseball. She doesn’t even have a cap!”

Sage turned and some of the perfection of the outfit had rubbed off. He loved that.

Luke looked down at her, and he loved the vision. “Well, I have a cap. She can borrow mine.”

Going over to her, Luke stood behind her and put his hands on her shoulders. She put her hands up on his.

“Oh, no!” Ryder squealed, waving his hands. “No mushy stuff in the kitchen!”

Pointing at his sandwich, Sage stood and turned. “Eat.” Then she laced her fingers in Luke’s and they went over to the sink. “Did you find her?”

“She was at Rory’s.”

Concern slid into her eyes. “Doing what?”

He lifted his eyebrows but didn’t fill in any of the details.

“Good point,” she said. “Did you tell Dad?”

“He’s on his way over there. They should be home pretty soon.”

“That should be fun.”

“My thoughts exactly.”

Tipping her head over to the grocery sacks, she shrugged. “You start supper. I’m going to go find something that I can play baseball in.”

When he angled questioning eyes on her, she smiled ruefully. “Hey, it’s better than fishing.”

Sage had three suitcases open and was rummaging through a fourth when she heard the first slam of the door.

“Jayc,” she heard Luke say and then the second slam just down the hall.

“Dear Lord,” Sage prayed, holding the only shirt that wasn’t silk, satin, or appropriate for a night out at the ballet, “I know Jaycee’s hurting, and I know You know too. Please, please, show us what to do because she doesn’t deserve to be in this much pain.”

“Yeah,” Mr. Lawrence said as he and Luke had a very quiet conversation in the kitchen over the potatoes Luke was cutting up. “I guess I underestimated that.”

Luke nodded and glanced behind him, knowing either or both could walk in any second. “Jayc has been freaked out about this whole thing since she found out.” He sliced one potato in half and went to quartering it. “I knew we were headed for trouble, but I never expected this.”

“She’s always been the level-headed one. I could’ve rented out the Space Shuttle to her, and she’d have brought it back with a full tank of gas and the computer systems updated.”

“I hear you there. It’s just something about Sage that makes her lose her ever-lovin’ mind. I couldn’t believe the stuff she’s said to her. I mean, mean stuff, cruel stuff, stuff I’m still having a hard time believing Jaycee would even say to anybody.”

That piqued her father’s interest. “Like?”

Another glance and Luke gave up the secrets. “Like that Sage was a mistake that never should have happened.”

Her father shook his head. “She said that?”

“Had Sage in tears for most of an afternoon, and I’m not sure she’s still gotten past it.” Luke knew they both loved both girls. He also knew they were going to have to get on the same page with this thing if they had any hope of untangling it. “I think Sage pretty much tried to stay out of Jayc’s way to begin with. But then that kind of got to be impossible.” He sliced, thought, and sliced again. “Crazy thing is I can’t even really blame Jaycee. This whole thing kind of freaked me out too.”

The older man didn’t say anything.

“Mind if I ask you a question?” Luke asked as if he might shatter the whole situation even further. “And you can say no if you want.”

What secrets were left to keep? “Sure.”

Luke nodded. “Okay, I get that you and Mrs. Lawrence were fightin’ about the whole job thing, and I get why you went out there. What I can’t really figure out is if you actually loved Sage’s mom or if that was just a rebound thing, like a one-night-stand kind of a deal. But then that don’t make any sense either because how would she have known how to contact you?”

“You’re asking if I loved her.”

A second and he looked right at him. “Yeah, I guess that’s what I’m asking.”

Her father nodded slowly. “There are a lot of things about that time that I’m fuzzy about, but Ericka was truly something else. She worked in the office where I was, and she had this personality like she was creative and fun-loving, and she just loved life so much.” He shrugged. “So yeah, I think I thought I was in love with her. You know, like the kind the pastor was talking about today where a guy falls for a girl, and he really doesn’t think past getting her to like him.”

The slicing slowed. “But you left her?”

“We’d only been together a few times, and then Em called, and she wanted to work things out.” He put his hand on his head. “The crazy thing is, I’m not even sure I thought much about Ericka’s feelings over the situation. I mean, I was so wound up in my own stuff…” His words stopped, and he glanced back to the hallway which Luke did as well. There was no one there.

“What?” Luke finally asked in confusion.

“It’s just like now. I’ve been so wound up in my own stuff, I never really thought about them.” He shrugged. “I knew, for me, this was going to be hard. I never thought about what it was going to be like for Jaycee. Em, yes. But not Jaycee. Wow. That sounds bad.”

“I’m realizing we all do stupid things when we’re hurting.” Luke put the potatoes in the oven and set it. “I’ll be honest with you, Jayc has been my best friend for… forever. This isn’t her. This isn’t the Jaycee I knew. I got mad about that to begin with, but I’m beginning to think it’s not my anger and judgment she needs. She’s not that different than Sage. She’s hurt, and she’s angry, and maybe she needs some love like the preacher said.”

At that moment Luke felt Sage enter the room, and his gaze snapped that direction. Jeans, a buttoned-down shirt that looked like something most girls around here would and could wear to church and feel dressed-up. But the hair was down, the make-up gone. She put her hands in the air as if for inspection. “All done.”

“Woo-wee,” Luke said, whistling softly. “Them’s the nicest baseball clothes I’ve ever seen.”

“Baseball?” her dad asked.

“Yes.” Sage’s hands fell to her sides. “Apparently I have been challenged because Ryder thinks I hit like a girl.”

“You and baseball?” her father asked, raising his eyebrows.

“Yes. Me and baseball. I know all about the bats and balls and gloves.” She ticked them off her fingers. “And Luke here’s going to teach me to hit.”

Her father looked imminently amused. “This I’ve got to see.”

As it turned out her father had a baseball cap, and as it turned out, minus Jaycee, they all went into the small yard along the side of the house where there were no trees after supper.

Sage resettled the cap on her head. With her hair in a ponytail out the back of it, she had to say she was rocking this outfit.

“Okay, Sage,” her father said as he held the little ball up for her to see.

“Swing batter-batter-batter. Swing,” Ryder called behind him, putting his fist into his glove.

“No crazy stuff,” her father said. “Just slow and easy.” He tossed it her direction, and Sage cringed, lowering the bat and backing away from the ball.

“Ugh. I told you,” Ryder said. “That was worse than a girl!”

“It’s okay.” Luke retrieved the ball and threw it back to her father. “Here.” He came up behind her, and she glanced back at him.

“Hey, watch it,” she said, squirming.

“Well, I’m watching something, darlin’, but it ain’t gonna work like that. Here.” He picked up the bat and laid it onto her shoulder before putting his arms around her and his hands on hers.

Seriously. Who could think about baseball like this?

“Now, keep your eye on the ball,” Luke said right in her ear, and the butterflies in her stomach took off in a flurry. “Swing it like this.”

Together, they took a couple of practice swings.

“Don’t be afraid of it,” Luke said. “Your dad pitched my little league for years. He’s not going to hurt you.”

Well, that was comforting. She hadn’t even thought about him throwing it at her.

“Hello, people!” Ryder called. “We don’t have all day here!”

“Ready, Sage?” her father asked, holding up the ball.

She wasn’t even sure anymore, but she wasn’t going to say no. “Yeah. Throw it. Pitch it. Toss it. Whatever.”

He smiled at her as he tossed the ball to her. Together, they reached out for it, and connected with the ball.

Ryder went into hysterics in the mock-outfield. “Get it! Get it! Throw it! Tag her! Throw it!”

Luke looked at her and smiled. “Run.”

And she did even though there was no base to run to. The other two were having a very good time chasing her with the ball as she darted this way and that on the grass.

However, Ryder pulled his glove off and threw it to the ground. “What is this? Tag? I thought we were playing baseball here, people!”

“Maybe it’s tag ball,” Luke said, and with that, they were off, chasing each other all over the yard.

From the kitchen window, Jaycee watched them, having never felt so alone. It was like watching her worst nightmare come true. Sage had won. She had finally and totally taken Jaycee’s place.

Chapter 29

They didn’t go to the beach on Wednesday. Sage was too concerned about a repeat of Jaycee leaving Ryder, so she stayed home and made him another peanut butter and honey sandwich. Jaycee mostly stayed in her room, and the few times she came out, Sage was careful to watch her back—literally.

In the morning and afternoon, Sage was also careful to give plenty of time for Jaycee to go into the kitchen alone, and at night she made a plate, and her dad took it to Jaycee. Sage hated that, but she couldn’t figure out a way around it. Jaycee had no intention of rejoining them, and short of dragging her out of that room, Sage had no way of remedying that.

Emily was still at her sister’s, somewhere down south. She knew her dad had talked with her on the phone. She also knew she wasn’t coming home. Her mother and Jason were now in Monaco and headed in the next week to Spain. Sage knew they needed to talk about August, but two quick texts and that was all she got.

While Ryder played with his circuit set on the living room floor, Sage pulled the large Bible from the shelf. She’d never really read the Bible, heard it a few times mostly, but she wanted to find the parts the pastor had talked about—the one about the tea cup and David.

As she thumbed through the thing, she realized there was a lot more than that in there, and with no other thought, curled up on the couch, she spent the rest of the afternoon trying to get a grasp on God and how He really felt about her.

Luke had wanted to go to the beach with her. Who wouldn’t? But he also understood why she didn’t want to go. She needed to be there, and he needed to let her. So as he worked sorting and organizing his work shed, he prayed for her, for them, for Jaycee, even for Mr. and Mrs. Lawrence. Truth be known, it was much harder to pray for the parents on both coasts than for the kids, but Luke made himself anyway. They were once kids too, and though they had made some horrendous decisions to get here, he couldn’t condemn them because like it or not, there were reasons they were acting like they were.

He pulled up a large box of tools he’d gotten from his grandparents’ house one time. He’d never gone through them, and now was as good a time as any. Besides, it was nice to just have some time away from the storm to think and figure things out. He’d never been the fastest thinker on the planet, so letting his mind have some time to process was a very good thing.

The thing was, no matter how deep into the muck and the mess he went, he always came back to how much he had fallen in love with the girl from California. He didn’t know how this could ever work, but he wanted it to more than anything he’d ever wanted in his life. “God,” he whispered. “Show me the Plan, and if it’s not in Your plan that we end up together, help me accept that and love her enough to let her go.”

“Sage, you got a minute?” her father asked on Wednesday evening as she sat in the den still engrossed in the Bible. She’d found the part about David, but she was still searching for the tea cup part.

“Uh, yeah, sure.” She moved her feet off the couch and closed the book.

He came over, surveyed her and sat down. “Listen, I know you’ve been taking care of Ryder, and I really appreciate that.”

A ‘but’ was coming. She heard it, and she hated that word.

Rubbing his hands together, her father watched only them. When he finally looked up at her, there was sadness and struggle in the depths of his eyes. “There’s no easy way to say this.”

He’s sending me back. Panic at that thought ripped through her, but she held that down with both hands and her heart. “It’s okay, Dad, whatever…” Be strong, Sage. Be strong.

“You know there are a lot of moving pieces here. This can’t just work for a couple of people. It has to work for everyone.”

She nodded, fighting the fear. “I know that.”

“Good. Okay. Well, Emily and I have talked, and well…” He put his hand on the back of his head. “I can’t just let that go. I mean, marriage is…”

“I know, Dad. I’m not asking…”

“I know you’re not.” His gaze came to hers, fell and rose back again.

“But she is,” Sage finished for him.

“She’s hurting and confused.”

Sage nodded, hating the having to. “So you’re sending me home then.”

Home. It had become such a strange word.

“No.” When he looked at her, the skirmish in his soul was clear. “I’m not sure what to do about all of that yet, but I know you going back is not what’s best for you.”

Tears started threading their way up through the panic. If she couldn’t go home and she couldn’t stay here, what was she supposed to do? “I’m not sure…”

He nodded slowly twice. “What would you think about going to stay with Pastor Steve and Jane? Just for a few nights. A week maybe. Until we can get this straightened out and get everyone on the same page.”

She was inconvenient, a piece that could be removed at will because it made things easier for everyone else. The tears were hard to blink back, but what choice did she have? “When?”

“Tomorrow. Em’s ready to come back, but only if you’re not…”

The knife went through her heart, piercing and demolishing the single small ray of hope that had started to grow there. “Okay.”

That night, Luke was not at all prepared for the phone call. She so rarely did that, and he had it answered before he even thought to worry. “Hey.”

“Um, hey,” she said, and the flat, scared tone in her voice yanked him straight up. “I’m sorry to bother you.”

“Bother me? It ain’t no bother. What’s up?”

Two things told him it was bad—that she said nothing and then that she had called in the first place.

“Sage? What’s going on?”

She had thought she could do this without crying. She had thought she could be strong. She was wrong on both counts. His gentle voice did this to her every time, and she couldn’t corral enough tears to make him believe she was handling this well. “Em’s coming home.”

Nodding into that, knowing there was more, Luke forced the panic in him down. “Okay. And…?” He knew there was an ‘and.’ Kind of like knowing fall is coming just because it always follows summer.

“And, I guess, I’m… leaving.”

“Leaving? Wait. What?” he almost yelled and then dialed that back, knowing he was going to freak her out. “What do you mean, you’re leaving? We talked about this.”

“No. I know that. I do. It’s not California.”

His eyes searched wildly for the other alternative, and for the life of him, he couldn’t find it. “Then where are you leaving to?”

“Apparently, I’m going to the pastor’s house.” She laughed and sniffed. “Crazy, huh? I’ve never really seen myself as a pastor’s kid. My friends would never let me hear the end of this one.”

“They’re sending you to live with the pastor? Why?”

This sniff was more to keep down the tears than to let them out politely. “I told you. Em’s coming home.”

“So they’re sending you away so she can come home? What does that solve?”

She laughed softly. “The problem of Sage I guess.”

Luke wanted to come over, to tell her dad what a stupid idea this was, but Sage talked him out of that. She was tired of fighting, tired of thinking there might be a chance for her not to get crushed by this only to turn around and be smashed. He couldn’t fault her for that. She was right on all counts.

So the next morning, he was up with the sun, drinking coffee and trying to get this right in his head. It wasn’t. Even after twelve long hours of fighting it, it still wasn’t right. Why couldn’t they just… just what? Patch it up and pretend it had never happened?

Clearly no one in the situation could do that.

He let out a sigh as his mother came in from the hallway.

“Wow. You’re up early? You got a job somewhere?”

It was a job, but not one he wanted any part of doing. He lowered the cup and held it there. “I’m going to help Sage move.”

“Move?” his mother stopped with worry. “Where is she moving to?”

“The pastor’s.”

Her eyebrows shot up. “She’s moving in with the pastor?”

“Apparently.”

“Okay. Why?”

He shrugged, wanting to make it seem like the no-big-deal everyone else thought it was. “Her stepmom is coming home, so I guess that means Sage is homeless.”

Target hit. His mother let out a slow stream of air. “Oh, no, I can’t believe it.”

Anger slashed through him. “Yeah? Well, that makes two of us.”

Three suitcases. Sage couldn’t carry anymore, and her heart kept saying if she could just get out of here, maybe it would stop hurting so badly.

“Oh, Sage,” her father said, meeting her in the hall. “Do you need some help with that?”

“No. I’ve got it.” She turned, ramming the suitcase and herself into the wall.

“Really. I could help.”

“No!” She reined that in but barely. “I’ve got it. Really. I do.” She crossed out into the kitchen where Jaycee sat munching on a bowl of yellow flakes. Her sister didn’t bother to look up, but Ryder did, and his eyes went wide.

“Sage? Where’re you…”

Brave face, Sage. Brave and happy face. “I’m going on a little trip,” she said, lifting her chin. “I’m going to stay with some friends for a couple days.”

“But I thought you weren’t leaving anymore.”

“I’m not,” she said, fighting back against the onslaught of tears. “I’m just going to be gone a couple of days. I’ll be back.”

He came over to her then and put his thin arms all the way around her, and heedless of the suitcases dangling on her arms, Sage returned the hug.

“I’m gonna miss you,” he said, burrowing into her.

The crunching at the table got much louder.

“Aw. I’m gonna miss you too, buddy. But you keep working on that swing, okay?”

He nodded and backed up, and Sage couldn’t bear to look into those grief-stricken eyes.

“Knock. Knock.”

All four gazes snapped up, and Sage had to beat all the emotions back with a stick as Luke strode into the room. His gaze swept them, a message for each one, and finally landed on hers.

“This it?” he asked, nodding to the suitcases.

“Uh, y-yeah.”

His face said how badly he wanted to scream at everyone there, but somehow he said nothing as he calmly took the three bags from her.

Sage took one look at him, steeled her courage and turned back for her father. “Well.” Words, Sage. Say something. Don’t just stand here like an idiot. “Thank you.” She had no idea how to finish that sentence or if there even was a finish.

As if he had no idea what to do next, her father held out his arms, and Sage stepped into them. “I’ll be in touch,” he said softly.

In touch. The words stripped the rest of her dignity away from her, and she nodded before backing up. “Okay.” Her gaze went over to Luke’s. “I’m ready.”

They got in the car, and Luke was having all kinds of trouble keeping his emotions from boiling over—at her father, at Mrs. Lawrence, at her. How could any of them think this was a good idea? He looked over at her as he started the car, and he knew to the depths of his being that she didn’t think it was. Somehow he had to say something to keep her from completely giving up hope. Reaching across to her, he took her hand in his. “The pastor’s a good man. He and Mrs. Mitchell are good people.”

But Sage didn’t even look at him. “I know.”

When they got to the pastor’s house, Mrs. Mitchell was waiting for them on the front steps. “Sage, honey,” she said as Sage followed Luke, who had the suitcases, up the steps. “We’re so glad you came.” And then she did the unexplainable and put her arms around Sage.

It wasn’t expected and maybe that’s why it dragged the tears out of her skull so forcefully. “Thank you.”

“Oh, absolutely.” She backed up and took Sage’s face in her hands. “You are welcome here any time.”

More tears. And they were getting much harder to keep down.

Once Sage was settled in the dusty-gray guest bedroom with the double bed and the wine-red accents, Luke knew he couldn’t just leave her here. That wasn’t right no matter how he sliced it. Taking her hand in his, he lowered his gaze on her. “What do you say we go out?”

“Out?” She looked up at him in panic. “It’s Thursday morning. Where would we go?”

He shrugged. “Doesn’t matter long as I’m with you.”

At first he thought her answer looked to be a solid yes. Then her gaze fell and fled, and he could tell she was about to cry. “I don’t… They…”

He took a breath and gathered her to him. “It’s okay. I’ll talk to Mrs. Mitchell.”

A breath and Sage nodded, and he was pretty sure this was going to be the quietest day he’d ever spent with somebody.

Sage knew she should talk him out of this little trip to wherever, but the truth was, she didn’t have any fight left in her. Mrs. Mitchell would surely think her a whore going out before she had even been here, but then again, she probably thought that already anyway. So what was the point of putting on an act to revise a judgment that was already set? Sage had no answer for that nor for any of the other million questions twining through her.

“Oh, Mrs. Mitchell,” Luke said, leading Sage out where they found the pastor’s wife dusting the living room.

“Oh, good. Luke, did you get Sage squared away?” Inexplicably her gaze went to Sage rather than to Luke, and she smiled with a light in her eyes Sage knew she didn’t deserve.

“Yes, Ma’am, we did, but we were wondering.” He glanced down at Sage who cowered behind him. “Well, unless you have something for Sage to do today. I was wondering if we could go out for a while, get out of your hair.”

“Well, there’s no need for that,” she said, but then she smiled. “But I don’t see any harm in you two spending the day together. Why don’t I give you my number, and you can just check in and let me know what you’re doing?”

Luke let out a breath and reached for his phone. “Yes, Ma’am.”

Back in his car, Luke looked over at her. “God’s got a plan.”

She arched her eyebrows. “You sure about that?”

“Well, He got us this far, right?”

“What? To the edge of nowhere?”

He couldn’t argue, so he didn’t. “So what do you want to do? We could drive over to Wilmington, go to the mall.” The look she sent him made him laugh. “What? I thought you liked the mall.”

“I do, but something tells me you’ve never stepped foot in one.”

Luke backed up, offended. “I have too. I had to go there once with my mom and sisters. Longest four hours of my life.”

Sage laughed out loud, and he liked that. “I don’t know. What do you want to do?”

He sat for a moment, sizing her up. “Okay, you can totally say no if you want, but I’ve got this here drawer handle.” Reaching across her, he popped the glove box open and took out an ornate swing handle. “I’m trying to fix a dresser for my grandma, but I can’t find any of these things anywhere.”

She lifted her eyebrows in incomprehension. “So, what’re you planning to do about that?”

“Well, it’s clearly not new.” He held it up between them. “So I’ve been thinking about hitting the antique shop over in Greely, except I never seem to have enough time to get over there.”

Half a smile slid onto her face. “Then Greely it is.”

The drive to Greely was remarkably scenic. A lake and a stone bridge ushered them into the small town which was lined with houses straight out of the history books. It felt so different than the night she had come with Rory.

“It’s right down one of these streets,” Luke said, craning his neck as they went through each intersection.

Sage was really glad that there wasn’t much traffic seeing how it was just after ten o’clock on a Thursday morning. For her, she was content to ride and let the little town wrap around her. In fact, she realized as they got deeper into it that one reason she didn’t remember any of this was because on her excursion with Rory, they had never made it across the bridge.

“There it is.” Waiting for the old pickup truck to pass, Luke turned onto the little street that lay perpendicular to the main road and all the way up to what looked like a small house at the very end of what would normally be called a cul de sac, but out here it was just called a dead end.

As she looked at the place, antique was the perfect word for it. They sold antiques. The place was antique, and so was the little old man who greeted them from the front door of the establishment.

“Good morning!” he said as chipper as the birds singing in the trees above them. “Fine morning, isn’t it?” He moved a large Pepsico sign to the side and out of the walkway.

“It is that,” Luke said as he met Sage at the front of the car and put his hand at her back.

She wasn’t being rude, just intensely curious. It had been years since she’d been to a place like this though in California, they were often draped in beads and playing mood music. Out here, she wouldn’t have been at all surprised to hear a banjo and fiddle.

“What can I do you for?” The man came all the way to the edge of the sidewalk and tipped his head. The wrinkles said he was at least 80, but the spring in his step made her question that.

“Well, I’ve got this handle.” Luke held it up. “It’s from a dresser my grandma has. I’m looking for something to either match it or at least compliment it.”

“Hmm.” The man eyed the piece for several long seconds.

“If I can find a few like it, I can even mix and match them,” Luke offered.

“Well, why don’t you come on in here and let’s take a look-see.”

Taking her hand, Luke led her into the dimly lit place. The dark wooden floorboards squeaked as they walked in, and Sage was surprised to find they were made of real wood. Not wooden slats, but actual timbers. She wondered how long the “Rhorbach Antique Shop” had been operating.

“Okay. Here’s all the handles I’ve got,” the old man said, and he and Luke went to work, pouring through the old metal cabinet with the little drawers full of stuff.

As they talked, Sage at first off-handedly and then with more curiosity started looking around. Everything was old. As in truly antique. There were signs from the fifties, and paintings in gold frames. Slowly the shop’s wonders overtook her need to stay with him, and she drifted away, going from one set of offerings to another. There was a glass set that was yellowish orange, and an old iron—the kind that they stuck in the fire to heat up. On one shelf there was a watch on a chain and a knife that had honestly seen better days.

Just drifting, she let the place show her what it wanted to. Porcelain dolls with hair that was matted and dirty. Pots and pans and a wheel from a baby’s carriage. Life—old and new—embraced her. These things, these old things, why were they here? What had they survived, and why had they survived when so many other things hadn’t? To one side there was an old piano, its keys clearly not in working condition. She stepped over to it and pinged one, having no idea if what it played was the right note or not. Above the piano was a pair of lady’s black riding boots. Sage was sure the woman who had first worn them must have thought the world at her feet. They were beautiful, even now.

A washboard. A lamp. A set of porcelain angels. She reached out to touch the wing of one, and it was almost as soft as it was smooth. Still drifting as the world receded into memory behind her, she turned a corner and found three large mismatched vases standing sentinel over a small jewelry box. Inside it, someone had placed a single strand of pearls and the matching earrings. She couldn’t resist, didn’t even think to. Instead, she went over to it and lifted out the pearls. Next to the little menagerie, on the shelf lining the wall was a small set of silver tea service pitchers.

Holding the necklace up to her, she gazed at her reflection in the pitchers and smiled softly. So regal. So classy. She could imagine Jackie O or Princess Grace wearing such a thing. To be classy like them. To walk into a room and have everyone turn and be inspired and awestruck.

Lowering the pearls, Sage went back over to the little jewelry box and laid them there. She would never be like that, not on the inside anyway, and certainly not on the outside either.

“There you are,” Luke said, and Sage nearly dropped the strand when she spun.

“Oh, yeah. Just admiring.” She let her hand drift over the black velvet of the case, and then she lifted her hand from the dreams she knew would never be hers.

“Some pretty cool stuff, don’t you think?”

“Absolutely. I love these angels and this watch is cool.” She went back over to where she had come from and lifted the gold timepiece for his inspection.

“Totally. Does it still work?”

She tilted her head as she snapped it open. “Doesn’t seem to be.”

Luke leaned on the old radio sitting there, watching her. “I think my grandpa has one like that. It’s in his top drawer. He showed it to me once. I think his grandpa gave it to him or something. He said some day maybe that one would be mine.” Straightening as he reached over, Luke took the watch from her and looped it into his jacket pocket. “What do you think?” He whipped it out and clicked it open. “Well, certainly I have the time for you, darlin’, how much do you need?”

Laughing at him, Sage put her hand on his arm. “You’re insane.”

“What? You found the watch.” He took it out and put it back on the shelf. “But there is some pretty cool stuff in here. Like that old phonograph in the corner. Did you see it?”

“I must’ve missed that.”

“Oh, you’ve got to see it.” He reached down and took her hand, pulling her back through the maze through which she had come. Halfway to whatever he was going to show her, however, she pulled up short.

“Aww. Look at this butterfly.” Carefully she lifted the vintage piece from the little table. It was pewter or bronze with little pink gemstones down the front forming the butterfly’s body. “It’s a hairclip.” She put it in her hand, amazed at the detail of it.

He was standing over her, shoulder-to-shoulder, his hands on his beltline, examining the thing. “It’s so tiny.”

“Oh.” Then she saw it. “It’s for a little girl to wear in her hair.” Lifting it, she put it to her hair and pulled one strand back and finally found a small reflection in one of the gold frames circling a painting of a lady to kind of see herself. “Man, if I was four, I would so get this.”

“You know.” Luke reached over and took it from her. “I’m not the greatest with colors.” He held it up. “But I think this is the same pink as that lace you put on Alyssa’s jacket.”

“Oh, you’re right. That would go perfectly with the jacket.”

He turned the piece over and without another thought, he closed his hand around it. “We’re so getting this.”

Surprise lit through Sage, and she smiled as she looped her arm through his. “What are you going for, the best uncle ever prize?”

Turning stunned eyes down on her, he shrugged. “Best uncle ever? That’s some high praise there.”

She tipped her shoulder. “You give her that, they’ll give you a crown and everything.”

Together they walked then, through the shop, back and forth. They even ventured outside where they found an old Ford pickup that somehow had a real tree growing out of where the engine once was.

Shaking his head, Luke laughed. “Now I’ve gotta say, I’ve never seen anything like that before.”

“Oh! Oh! Here.” She whipped out her cell phone, gave it to him, and jumped on the fender. “You’ve got to take my picture.”

Luke laughed with a grin as she posed. “Oh, yeah. That is totally Sage Hollywood.”

She lifted her hair and smiled for the camera as he clicked three pictures. Then she jumped off, dusted her hands off, and came over to him.

“Okay. Now, you’re turn.”

“Me?”

“Yes, you.” Pushing him over, she took her cell phone camera from him and angled it that direction, knowing above all else she wanted photographic proof of this day.

He raised his eyebrows and lowered his gaze at her. “Okay. I ain’t posing.”

Sage lifted her chin and backhanded, waved at him. “Lean up against that windshield frame and look all serious.”

At first, he just looked confused, but then he put his foot up on the running board, crossed his arms, and scowled. “Like this?”

She hardly caught the laugh before it jumped from her. “Oh, yeah. That’s great. You look like Clyde from Bonnie and Clyde.”

Skepticism took over his face. “Didn’t he kill someone?”

That dragged a laugh right out of Sage. “We’ll be sure to avoid the jail on the way out of town.”

“Oh, that’s comforting.” Pulling his foot down, he picked up his hand. “Come here, you.” He pulled her over to him, took the camera from her, and angled it toward them but at arms’ length. “Say best day ever!”

“Best day ever!” And she had no doubt at all that it was.

“K. So I’ve been thinking,” Luke said as he held her hand in his as they headed back through the country side to the pastor’s house.

“That’s frightening.” She grinned over at him, and he loved the new light in her spirit. “Just teasing. What were you thinking?” It didn’t help him that she wound her other hand over the top of his because the more of her that was touching him, the less his self-discipline seemed to work.

“Well, two things actually.”

“Two things? Wow. Didn’t know you were becoming such an overachiever.”

“Hey, smart aleck.”

She quirked a grin at him and batted her eyelashes. “Yes, Sir?”

He shook his head, seeing he wasn’t going to talk her out of the sass. “Well, I’ve been thinking. Alyssa’s birthday’s on Sunday, and the party’s at Mom and Dad’s after church.” Glancing over, his heart flipped at how open and happy she looked. When had this happened again? How was there this beautiful, awe-inspiring girl sitting in his car looking like she wouldn’t breathe again until she heard the next word he said? Luke fought not to shake his head to wake up from this dream because he was absolutely convinced at that moment that nothing else could explain the feeling. “So, I guess the first question is, what’re you doing on Sunday?”

Some of the happiness slipped from her face. “Good question. I don’t know. Everything’s so complicated…”

“Not if you say yes it isn’t.”

Her eyes asked his if it was really that easy.

“You should be there.” He looked over at her again. “I want you to come.”

Sage sighed long and slow. “Well, if you put it like that.”

“Is that a yes?”

“That’s a yes if there’s any way, I’ll be there.”

Luke squeezed her hand. “Good. And now for the second thing.”

She let out a hard exhale. “There’s more?”

“Just one more.” He looked over at her, knowing what it was to ask this one. “Will you go with me to the bonfire tomorrow night?”

The rest of the happiness slid from her face. “Luke…”

“No. Now, darlin’, I know what you’re going to say, and part of me agrees with that. But the real truth is that it’s a decent bet you might still be here come August, and starting to get to know people now would not be a bad thing.”

Sliding around in her seat, she put her head back on the headrest as she crossed her arms in front of her. “They don’t want me there.”

“They don’t even know you.”

“They think they do.”

He scrunched his face. “Well, you’re never going to convince them otherwise if you don’t at least try.”

When she said nothing, Luke shook his head. “Look, I’m not going to make you, and I really do get why you don’t want to, but we’ve got to start somewhere.”

“And you think the bonfire is a good place to do that?”

Luke shrugged. “I don’t know. I just think we’ve got to start somewhere.”

When they got back to the pastor’s house, Sage wanted to have him stay, but she also knew he couldn’t stay every minute of every day. Still he walked her to the door, and she let him because life was just so much better with him right there.

At the door, he walked up two of the three steps and stopped, putting his hand up on the brick opening. “So, tomorrow night then?”

Sage leaned her head and shoulder on the bricks of the entrance. “Do you really think that’s a good idea?”

A second of looking at her and he tilted his head the other way. “Tell you what, we’ll go out there, but if it’s way weird, we can always do something else.”

She loved that about him—how he thought about her and what was best for her. The way he was looking at her screamed how much he wanted to kiss her, and Sage jerked her gaze away from his and up to the little porch light above them. Somehow kissing guys on the front steps of the preacher's house didn’t say proper. “Okay.” Her heart simply couldn’t let him just walk away. “Will you call me?”

His face broke into a grin. “Do you want me to?”

However, considering what she was about to face, she couldn’t quite match his teasing. Instead, she just nodded.

“Come here.” He folded her into his arms and she laid her head on his shoulder. “It’s going to be okay. I promise.”

Strange how that promise always felt so solid when he was holding her.

Letting her go took all of Luke’s willpower, but finally he did and backed up. “Just be you. Okay?”

She nodded, her gaze on the ground between them, and gently he lifted the edge of her hair and replaced it over her shoulder. When her gaze came up, it was laced with melancholy. “You’d better go before they see you.”

He hated how wary she looked, but he did understand. “K.” Then with superhuman strength he got himself to back up. “I’ll call you.”

This nod was accompanied by a tight-lipped smile as she backed from him toward the front door. In seconds she had turned and fled inside, and Luke sent up a silent prayer for God to keep and protect her until he could be with her again.

Chapter 30

“Oh, hello,” Pastor Steve said, coming down the hall the other way when Sage was safely in the door.

Instantly she straightened, tossing her shoulders back and raising her chin. “I’m… hello, Pastor. I didn’t see you there.”

He smiled softly, the reading glasses perched on his nose and the papers in his hands. “Tell you what, why don’t you call me Steve?”

Sage’s eyes went wide and she took in a small gasp. “Oh, uh.”

His smile just increased. “Unless you prefer Pastor.”

She didn’t have a clue what to say to that, and her tongue felt like it was made of concrete.

A second and he glanced back down the hall. “I think Jane’s in the living room reading.”

Why did nodding feel like it was going to break her in two? “Okay.”

Carefully as he stepped over into his office, she hugged the wall and started to the living room. There was no way to get to her room from here without going through there, and at that moment, digging a hole to go through China sounded like the better option. Knowing the questions, comments, and accusations were coming, she steeled her nerves and stepped into the little room with the mismatched furniture.

“Oh, Sage.” Mrs. Mitchell whipped the glasses off of her face and smiled. “I wondered if that was you.”

“It’s me,” she squeaked out, fighting not to pass out from the blood rushing to her head.

Mrs. Mitchell smiled wider and patted the couch beside her. “Why don’t you sit down?”

Because I want to run? “O… kay.” Every move was calculated with care as Sage sat on the edge of the couch, feeling how she was dressed or not dressed which was more the point. This was not what one wore to visit the pastor’s wife.

“So how was your day?” Mrs. Mitchell closed the book in her lap as her full gaze came over to Sage.

The nod somehow betrayed her before she could draw it back. “Good.”

However, Mrs. Mitchell seemed to drill into that word with her gaze. “Good-good? Or just good?”

Sage chanced one glance that direction as she smoothed out her jeans. “Good-good. We went over to Greely, to the antique stop there.”

That piqued her hostess’s attention. “Antiques? I didn’t know you were a fan of antiques.”

“Oh.” Real and not real battled for control, reaching through the mirror in hand-to-hand combat for how to answer that. “Um, I don’t do much of it anymore, but my mom and I…” Don’t say it, Sage. Don’t let her know you were poor.

“You and your mom?” Mrs. Mitchell tipped her head in question.

“I…” Sage let her gaze drop to her hands. No polish on her nails. She was a mess. “When I was little, sometimes we would go. She always found really cool stuff.”

“What a neat way to spend a day.”

The nod was overtaken by the sadness. “I haven’t done that in a really long time though.”

“But it was nice to do it again?”

She couldn’t stop the softness from touching her heart. “Yeah, it was.”

All afternoon as he fixed his grandmother’s dresser in the little shed, Luke thought about her, prayed for her, and tried to game out what happened from here. She couldn’t stay at the pastor’s forever, and going home didn’t seem an option—either home. No, the more he thought about it, the more he came to the conclusion that if God didn’t show up, there just wasn’t a good option to be found, and that was frightening him to the core.

Supper was quiet. Chicken noodle soup and grilled cheese sandwiches, which Mrs. Mitchell apologized for about 32 million times. However, Sage didn’t care. She was thankful she wasn’t out on the street.

They discussed the coming church services, some lady who had gotten sick over the last week, how the pastor needed to get over to the nursing home in Greely to visit a long-time church member, and the desperate need for a new refrigerator. Sage remembered Luke mentioning that, but rather than participate in the conversation by saying that, she simply sat, ate, and tried to blend in to the wall.

At the end of supper when Mrs. Mitchell stood to do the dishes, Sage bolted to her feet. “I’ll get these. It’s the least I can do.”

Both of them looked at her in shock.

“Sage, you don’t have to…” Mrs. Mitchell started.

“No. Please. I want to.” She lifted her eyes open farther. “Please.”

Finally with one glance exchange between them, Mrs. Mitchell nodded. “I guess that would be okay.”

As Sage washed the dishes, she thought about the arrangement, she thought about home and who was doing the dishes there, she thought about her mother and Jason. At some point she was going back there. She knew it though she knew what they had promised. Sometimes promises weren’t worth the air they traveled on.

The phone in her pocket vibrated, and she dried her hands to dig it out, glad her hosts had gone to other parts of the house. She swiped it on.

Just thought I’d tell you I’m thinking about you.

Sage shook her head and sighed. How could he make her feel so wanted and loved with one sentence? She typed her reply that she’d text him later because she was doing the dishes, and she hit send. It was nice to be loved.

They had texted back and forth most of Thursday evening, and Friday Luke had to deliver the dresser and go help Mr. Conrad fix the loose shingles on his barn. Sage knew that and figuring it wasn’t a great idea to have him texting on the roof, she mostly kept herself busy dusting everything in sight. The pastor and his wife had gone to Greely to visit Mrs. Sullivan though they had both expressed concern about leaving her home alone.

Sage had finally convinced them she was fine, and she would try very hard not to burn the house down in their absence. With a laugh, they relented and left. So she found a rag in the kitchen and set about dusting. Dusting had turned out to be something of a nice pastime. She wasn’t locked in her room, and it gave her a subtle way of getting to know those she was staying with.

Plus, she had learned some things about how to dust with the intent to learn. No longer did she do the task just to get through it. Now as she picked each piece up or dusted each picture on the wall, she took the time to notice it, to study it, to see what it could teach her about those who lived here. One thing she was learning was that those who wanted to remember did so with pictures. The Mitchells were no different. There was the picture of their wedding and a couple of them in the church. There was one of Mrs. Mitchell wrinkling her nose into the camera as she stood on the beach, and one of the pastor holding a small boy.

That’s when Sage began to wonder about them. They clearly loved each other and the Lord. Had they chosen not to have children, or had life somehow chosen that for them? She wished she could ask, but she would never dare.

Picking up the little tea cup, she plotted out what she would do once she finished with the dusting. Surely there was a Bible around here somewhere. She could do a search on her phone for the elusive passage about the tea cup. She wanted to find it. She needed to find it. And she floated on that thought for the next two hours.

When Luke took a break at three, he sent her a text. He hoped she had asked them, but just in case, he figured reminding her couldn’t hurt.

Sage was sitting on the couch, the Bible she had found in the living room end table on her lap and her phone in her hands when the pastor and his wife came home. He stopped in his office, she didn’t.

“Oh, Sage,” Mrs. Mitchell said as if she was surprised to see her.

Instantly Sage was moving, closing the book as if she’d been caught robbing a jewelry store. “I’m sorry. I was just…”

“No,” Mrs. Mitchell said, holding up her hand to stop her. “No, honey. I didn’t mean you have to leave. Just surprised to see you out here.”

Sage tugged on her blouse. “I’m sorry. I can go.”

Mrs. Mitchell laughed out loud at that. “Really, you don’t have to hole up in your room. You’re welcome to be out here.”

“Oh.” Then Sage looked down at the book in her hands, realizing she should explain that too. “Um, I was just… reading a little.”

“Good book to start with,” Mrs. Mitchell said with a light in her eyes. “Do you have a favorite passage?” Coming over, she sat in one of the chairs, and very carefully Sage sat back on the couch.

“Um, well, actually, I’ve been trying to find the tea cup passage, but I must not be very good at this because I haven’t been able to find it.”

“The tea cup passage?” Mrs. Mitchell held her hand out for the book, and Sage handed it to her. “I’m not familiar with that one.”

“Oh. Hm.” Wow was it a challenge to not shrink in total embarrassment. “It’s the one Pastor Steve was telling us about the other day, about the tea cup and how it’s chipped and all.”

That drove even more confusion to Mrs. Mitchell’s face as she fanned through the Bible. A second and she ducked backward. “Steve?”

“Yeah?”

“Can you come here a minute?”

Oh, no. Sage wanted to dissolve under the sofa. What was Mrs. Mitchell doing? Didn’t she know he was the pastor? He was busy. He was important. He didn’t have time for this.

“What’s up?” he asked, coming into the living room.

“Sage has been looking for the tea cup passage,” his wife said. “But that’s not one I’m familiar with. She said you were telling her about it?”

“Tea cup…? Oh. The tea cup.” Pastor Steve laughed, and Sage really considered running. However, there was mirth not disappointment when he looked at her. He sat down on the armrest of his wife’s chair. “No. That wasn’t from the Bible. That was something…” He stood, went over to the tea cup on the shelf, picked it up, brought it over, and sat down on the opposite side of the couch with her. “I was telling them that God’s love for us is like my love for this tea cup. It’s mis-matched and it’s chipped, but that someone, somewhere thought it valuable enough not to throw away, and how that reminds me about how God values us even though we’re chipped and mis-matched and not perfect.”

“Oh.” Mrs. Mitchell nodded and laughed as well. “I should have known.” She closed the Bible. “Sage, if you’re going to hang around here very long, you’re going to have to get used to Steve finding some lesson about God in everything.”

That tipped Sage’s head in confusion though she wanted to understand.

“It was one of the first things that made me fall in love with him,” Mrs. Mitchell continued. “Remember the one about the salt shaker?”

He laughed. “Oh, no. Don’t remind me.” He stood and replaced the tea cup on the shelf as his wife burst out laughing.

Sage wasn’t quite following, and she was sure her face registered that fact.

“We were just out of college, living on a penny and a prayer. I’m not even sure you’d gotten your first placement.” She looked at her husband.

“No. We were living in that little dump of an apartment at that point.” Coming back, he sat back down. “That one over the garage.”

“That’s right. We were.” His wife smiled at him lovingly. “Well, one night he was studying something about the salt of the earth and how it flavors food but if it goes flat, then you just throw it out. He got all into this sermon as we were eating, and he picks up the salt shaker, and…” She was about in tears, she was laughing so hard. “He flipped it over, and…”

Her husband shook his head though there was a smile on his face as well. “The lid wasn’t on good, and the salt went everywhere, all over my meal and the table and the floor.”

“Talk about a lot of flavor!”

Sage had never seen anyone laugh that hard, and she was trying to figure out what to do with it. Should she laugh as well? She wanted to, but was that appropriate?

Pastor Steve leaned over to Sage. “And she has never let me forget that one either.”

Finally, wiping her eyes, Mrs. Mitchell came back to the present, still quaking with the laugher. “There’s never a dull moment with Steve around.” Her laughter was coming back down to the ground, and she looked at him. “But that’s why I love him. He keeps life interesting.”

And then, Sage began to really feel the love that was in that room. The room was literally nothing special. Bland walls, mis-matched furniture, flattened shag carpet, and yet… She looked at them, individually and as a couple. They were simple people. A lot like the others she had met upon coming here. No fancy clothes, cars or shoes. But they were getting something right. Something important. Something she could feel when she let herself though it still felt just out of her reach.

“Okay, well now that you got that out of your system.” The pastor stood, walked over to his wife, kissed her head as she grasped his hand with hers, and he nodded to Sage. “If you need me to find any more passage—real or imagined—I’ll just be down here.”

And with that he walked off.

Sage wasn’t sure she shouldn’t be offended by the imagined comment. It didn’t sound like an insult, but she was pretty good at giving those subtle digs herself.

However, when he was gone, Mrs. Mitchell looked at her, her eyes shining and happy. “So what was it about the tea cup story that got you?”

Oh, wow. Sage hadn’t realized she would be quizzed. Her eyes went wide with the fear of interrogation. “Oh, I don’t…”

But the softness of Mrs. Mitchell’s face went with her when she shook her head. “I know things have been tough since you got here, and by here, I mean to town. I can only imagine how it’s been.” She folded her hands and leaned back, her gaze going only to her fingers. “I’m sure you’ve got lots of stuff to do, but if you’re interested, I have a little story for you.”

Something about her tone dragged Sage’s interest out. “Sure.”

A moment and a nod, and Mrs. Mitchell looked at her. “I may not know exactly how you feel, but I remember how it felt, how I felt when Steve and I first started going together. I was quite young and honestly from the wrong side of the tracks. My dad was a drunk, and my mom worked two jobs trying to keep me and my two brothers fed with a roof over our heads.”

Why that surprised Sage so very much, she didn’t know, but it did.

“Steve’s daddy was a preacher, and completely against stereotype, Steve was a really good guy. He and his mom would come over sometimes and bring Steve’s old clothes for the boys to wear. They’d bring casseroles and stuff too when Daddy wasn’t there. Nicest people you’d ever want to meet.” She sighed. “When we got into high school, there was this guy who was always pestering me to go out. He was really creepy, and one day he was hanging around my locker trying to get me to go out with him, and he would not take no for an answer. Steve was just a couple lockers down, and he heard the guy.

“Course Steve wasn’t some weight lifter who could beat the guy up to make him stay away from me, so he came over and asked why the guy was hitting on his girlfriend. I’m not sure who was more surprised, the guy or me.” She giggled softly, and then her gaze dropped. “After the guy left, I told Steve he shouldn’t be telling lies like that, and he said it wouldn’t be a lie if I really did go out with him.”

Sage’s heart melted. She knew a guy exactly like that. “So you went out with him?”

“Eventually.” Mrs. Mitchell’s eyes were soft and laced with moisture when they came up. “But it took me a long time to figure out he really was serious about loving those chipped tea cups.”

At that, Sage’s heart and gaze fell.

“I’m not a preacher,” Mrs. Mitchell said. “I don’t have the degrees on the wall or anything like that, but if you ever want to talk, I’m here.”

Without lifting her gaze, Sage nodded.

Luke typed another message when he headed home, determined that if she didn’t text back, he was personally going to go find out what was going on before the sun went down.

The phone in her pocket buzzed, and Sage jumped, her eyes going wide as she dug it out. “Um.”

“No. No. Don’t mind me. I have some dishes to put away.” And with that, Mrs. Mitchell excused herself.

Sage read the text. Are we still on for tonight?

Tonight. The bonfire.

Even the thought sent shivers running the wrong way down her spine. Uh, I haven’t asked yet.

You want me to?

She let out a breath. He didn’t give up. She sighed. No. I’ll go ask.

Knowing she had no choice, she stood and tried to smooth herself out from the living room to the kitchen where she found Mrs. Mitchell who turned at the motion by the door.

“Oh, Sage. Do you need something, honey?”

A swallow and Sage picked up her phone and tipped it in the air. “That was Luke. He was… well, he was wondering if we could go to the bonfire tonight.”

“I don’t see why not.”

Really? Sage could give her a catalog of good reasons why not. “You don’t mind?”

“Well,” Mrs. Mitchell seemed to question her own decision. “Hang on, let me ask Steve.”

Sage held the phone in front of her, knowing he was going to text again if she didn’t answer. Two minutes and Mrs. Mitchell came back in.

“Steve said to invite Luke over for supper first. Then y’all can go out for a while.”

Oh, how could it have gotten worse? “Oh. Okay.”

And so, Luke showed back up at the pastor’s on Friday night as the sun was starting its decent from the sky. He raked his hair back, adjusted his jacket, and reached up to knock. Tamping his fear down, he let his gaze go out to the street. Surely by now everyone knew the situation, so why did his heart rev up when a car went down the street beyond? “Don’t think about them. They’re going to say what they’re going to say.”

“Oh, hi, Luke,” Mrs. Mitchell said, opening the door. “Come on in.”

“Luke,” Pastor Steve said as he helped Sage set the table. He put out his hand.

“Thanks for having me.” Luke shook the pastor’s hand, looking really overdressed for the bonfire, and more nervous than Sage had ever seen him.

She was across the way, pulling out silverware, and suddenly her fingers felt like butter. Her gaze slipped up over to him, and he half-smiled at her as if merely looking at each other might get them both in serious trouble.

“Sorry we’re not more fancy,” the pastor said, putting out the plates.

“Oh, no, no, that’s fine,” Luke said, holding up his hands. “Uh, what can I help with?”

And just like that, they were all bringing things to the table. In minutes they were seated around it, and the pastor offered grace.

Strangely, Sage got the same feeling she’d had earlier in the living room, of comfortable, nobody-has-to-impress-anybody love. She wished she could capture it somehow, bottle it, and bring it with her everywhere.

“So, you’re going out to the bonfire tonight,” the pastor said as they each filled their plates. “Is it at Chester’s?”

“Yes,” Luke said formally. “It should only be the kids from around here though. I think there’s a dance in Greely.”

The pastor nodded. “What goes on at these bonfires anyway?”

Luke shrugged. “Just a bunch of kids hanging out mostly.”

“And the fighting thing, was that from people drinking?”

His glance was surprised and quick. Sage put her head down, feeling their judgment. “Uh, no, sir. Actually, there was a guy there—Rory Harris. You might know him. They come to the church sometimes.”

“I know the Harrises,” the pastor confirmed.

“Well, let’s just say Rory didn’t exactly know how to take Sage’s no for an answer.”

Her head was down now, and although her gaze was on her food, she never saw it.

“So I was just helping him with his vocabulary skills is all,” Luke continued, and he forked potatoes into his mouth as if he hadn’t just set off a bombshell at the table.

“Oh.” The pastor nodded three times and then looked to his wife who raised her eyebrows. “Well, sometimes those things happen.”

His wife smiled at him softly. “Yes, they do.”

“I can’t believe they let me come,” Sage said as they headed out an hour later.

Luke looked across at her and smiled. “I sure am glad because I’d hate to have to go to jail for busting you out of the pastor’s house.” His hand tightened around hers. “How’s that going anyway?”

She pulled in a long breath. “Good actually. I’m learning a lot.”

“Oh, yeah? Like what?”

“Like tea cups aren’t in the Bible, and people aren’t always what you think they are at first.”

He lifted his chin and lowered it slowly. “Sounds like good lessons.”

“They are.”

He didn’t want to admit it, but Luke was bracing himself for what happened when they got to the bonfire. However, he didn’t want her to get more nervous because of him, so he forced his own jitters down as he helped her from the car. The party was already in full swing with music and people here, there, and everywhere. Together, they walked into the small but boisterous crowd, and the closer they got, the closer Sage got to him.

“If you want to go,” he said, ducking so only she could hear him, “just say the word.”

She looked up at him with fear in her eyes. “Word?”

The laugh probably didn’t help, but it was out before he could stop it. He pulled her to him and kissed her hair. “That would be that creative thing I keep hearing about.”

At that, she smiled too. “Something like that.”

“Hey, Luke,” Rachel said, coming over. Her gaze slid from him to Sage. “Hi. It’s Sage, right?”

“Yeah.” Sage shrugged from behind him, her oversized dusty rose crocheted top came with her small hand when she put it out to Rachel. “Rachel, right?”

“Yeah.” Rachel shook her hand and then looked up to Luke. “I haven’t seen Jaycee. Is she coming?”

He wanted to deck Rachel, but it wasn’t her fault. “Oh. I’m not sure. Haven’t talked to her in a couple of days.” Then he looked down at Sage and put his arm around her, casually but pointedly. “Come on. Let’s go get a Coke. See ya, Rach.”

“Yeah,” Rachel said with no hint of happiness.

Luke steered Sage over to one of the coolers and got himself a Coke. “What do you want?”

She stayed back and put her arms over herself. “Oh, I’m fine.”

“There’s Coke, Sprite, Dr. Pepper, some tea things. How about Gatorade?”

“Uh. You really don’t have to.”

“Darlin’, my hand is going to freeze off my body here if you don’t tell me what you want.”

Sage lifted her eyebrows at that. “Fine. Coke.”

He came back up, two Cokes in hand. “There. Now was that so hard?”

Opening one, he handed it to her.

“Oh!” she said under her breath just as she took a drink.

“What? You didn’t want the Coke?”

“No. I love this song. I haven’t heard this in months.”

Song. Somehow Luke hadn’t realized there were actual songs being played just general music to fill in the gaps. He opened his own Coke and took a drink as he listened. “What is it?”

“Baby,” she sang. “You don’t have to call me. You don’t have to…” She swayed with the music and did a little bopping thing with her knees.

Fascinated, Luke backed up and looked at her. “I didn’t know you dance.”

“Only when nobody can see me.” She smiled up at him as she did a circle around herself. Then she took another drink and kept bopping. “How about you? Do you dance?”

“As little as possible.” He took a drink. “I think Homecoming my freshman year scarred me for life.”

Her bopping slowed. “When you went with Jaycee?” Funny how they could have an entire conversation hiding behind sips of soda.

“That would be the one.” He shrugged. “Mostly the girls did the mob dancing thing, and us guys hung out in the corner and prayed they wouldn’t remember we were there.”

“Brave. Very brave.”

“Smart. Very smart.”

She turned wide, doe-eyes up at him. “So then you wouldn’t dance with me if I asked?”

That was a trick question and he knew it, so instead of answering, he took a drink. “You don’t want to dance with me. Trust me on that one.”

However, he knew with one look that he was going to get talked into doing just that. “I dare you.”

“No, now, come on. That’s not fair and you know it.”

“I double-dog, triple-cat dare you.”

“Triple-cat? That’s not even a thing.” He took a sip. “It’s like prunicated. It only exists in your mind.”

“If it exists in my mind, then it exists.” With that she set her can on the road and came up, putting her hands on her hips in challenge. “One dance.”

“No.”

“It’s one dance.”

He took a sip. “No.”

“One dance and I’ll wash all the dishes at the next meal.”

The offer took him one second too long to decipher.

“I’ll take that as a yes,” she said, taking his can and setting it beside hers on the road. Her song had melted into another song, a slower one, and Luke knew he was not getting out of this. She took his hands in hers, and the thought of the strand of her that really was Sage Hollywood came over him. Persuasive, beautiful, and seductive. It was not a comforting combination when you were trying to keep a polite distance. “Now, this is real easy.”

His hands in hers, she put them onto her hips. “Your hands go here. Like this.”

And then, completely caught in her web, he gave in and let her start them swaying together. She brushed her hair that hung in loose waves across her shoulders back. “And I put my hands up here like this.”

Lands, she could lead him anywhere like this, and he knew it. When she looked up at him, her eyes brushed across his and held. He glanced at her lips and shook himself out of that thought. Too many people. Too many watching eyes. But why was that so incredibly hard to remember with her looking at him like this?

“See,” she finally said, “it’s not so hard.”

No but it was about to make him completely insane. He had no more had the thought than she came closer and laid her head on his shoulder drawing him to her, swaying gently. Oh, boy. He was a goner for sure.

Chapter 31

Back at the pastor’s house at 11:30, they sat in the car, neither wanting to say good night.

“The light’s on,” Sage said, her gaze going over to Luke. “Do you think they’re waiting up?”

He nodded. “I would be.”

Somehow that touched her heart. “Why?”

“Just wanting to make sure you were safe.”

She dragged in a sigh and let it out. “Just so you know, no matter what happens, this has been the best summer of my life.”

His gaze was soft. “Mine too.” Moving to her then, he laid his lips on hers for one brief moment. “Now. Let’s get you inside so they don’t freak.”

Strange how even that made her like him more. He thought about things like that, and they were important to him. He got out and came around to help her, and she loved that about him too. On the way to the door he put his arm around her, and she loved that too. How was it possible to love every single thing about someone?

“So, I’ll be up on the roof again tomorrow, so if I don’t answer your texts right away, that’s why.”

“Oh,” she said, holding his hand around her, “roof work again? Isn’t that dangerous?”

He shrugged. “Been doing it since I was 15. You get used to it after a while.” At the steps, he suddenly slowed. “Oh, hey, I was going to say. Alyssa’s party is on Sunday. Do you think they’ll let you go?”

Sage wasn’t sure, but she was pretty sure they would if he asked. “Why don’t you come tomorrow evening, and you can ask them?”

His eyes widened. “Eat with you again?”

“Sure. They love you.”

“I’d hate to just barge in.”

On the top step, they stopped and turned so they were facing each other, her leaning back against the bricks. “Then I’ll ask and text you. Just don’t reply ‘til you’re off the roof.”

“Deal,” he said, and then he lowered his lips to hers, and all of life once again for that moment made complete sense.

Traipsing through the dark hallway, Sage made her way from the front door to the living room where she found the Mitchells on the couch watching television.

“Oh, Sage,” Mrs. Mitchell said, sitting up and hitting the mute button. “How was the bonfire?”

“Good.”

“No drama?” Pastor Steve asked.

“No. I think everybody pretty much had a good time.”

They both seemed to let out a sigh of relief. For a second Sage stood there and then realized they were missing their movie.

“I’m just going to go on to bed if that’s okay.” She pointed to the other side of the house.

“Sure. No problem,” Pastor Steve said, and he reached for the remote in his wife’s hand.

At the other hallway, Sage stopped and turned. “Oh, and I was wondering if Luke could come over tomorrow night… if that would be okay.”

The two of them looked at each other, and Sage saw the small smiles.

Mrs. Mitchell nodded. “I think that would be fine.”

And so the next night, Sage took extra care with her appearance without going overboard. She wanted them to like him. She wanted them to like her. Their opinion was becoming increasingly important to her. The rust colored top that had lace at the neckline, no sleeves, and a bell-shaped unfitted bottom looked better than she had remembered. If she stayed much longer, she was going to have to go back to the Lawrences’ to get the rest of her luggage. However, she didn’t want to think about that right now.

Flipping off the light, she went to help Mrs. Mitchell in the kitchen. It wasn’t a very big kitchen. Two people could hardly cook in there at the same time. Thankfully the pastor was out on a preacher call, so it was just the two of them. “What can I help with?”

Mrs. Mitchell turned and appraised her. “Poor Luke.”

That brought out Sage’s confusion. “Poor Luke?”

“Yeah, he’s going to take one look at you in that, and we’re going to have to wheel him out of here from the heart attack.”

Sage laughed. “I’d hardly call this heart attack material.”

Her hostess shook her head. “Here. You can stir this cream.”

Coming over and standing shoulder-to-shoulder with the woman, Sage did as instructed.

“You know what I like most about that outfit?” Mrs. Mitchell asked, carefully dumping the vegetables she’d cut up into the pot.

“What’s that?”

“It brings out your natural beauty.”

That was intriguing and confusing. “How’s that?”

Pot lid on, Mrs. Mitchell turned to her. “I’ve seen your really super-dressy clothes. The suits I couldn’t afford if I saved my nickels for six years. The heels. The hair. And it’s impressive. No doubt about that. But this…?” She stepped back and put her fingers to her mouth before kissing them and popping them up. “Mmmwah. Bellissima.”

Funny. Out of all the compliments she’d ever gotten in her lifetime, this one went far deeper than she realized it would. “Thank you.”

Mrs. Mitchell put her hand out and traced it down Sage’s back. “Sweetheart, you have such a rare beauty. I don’t think you even realize how special it is. But it’s not about the clothes and the hair and all of that. It’s a softness, a radiance. I saw it the first time we met when you were covered in the horrible spaghetti sauce.”

“Ugh.” Sage sighed. “That was awful.”

“But even so.” Mrs. Mitchell shook her head. “You have an innocence about you, which I know is remarkable because you’ve dealt with so much. But it’s something that… it draws people to you, to want to protect you.”

“Or to rip you apart,” Sage said, stirring slowly.

Mrs. Mitchell nodded. “That too.” She stood there a second and then tipped her head. “Can I be honest with you?”

“Please,” Sage said though she wasn’t sure she could withstand what was coming.

“For a long time after Steve and I got together, I fought because I thought I wasn’t good enough for him. Then one night he told me that he had a theory.”

“Did it involve salt?”

Mrs. Mitchell smiled. “Not exactly. He told me that all that bad stuff that had happened to me early on was just Satan trying to take me out of the game because he knew how much difference I could make in the world. He said that Satan tries to take everyone out. It’s not a luck-of-the-draw thing, but some he tries even harder because he knows if he ever lets them get through his bony little fingers, he’s sunk because they will turn the world on fire for God if they ever really get it.” She never moved, barely blinked as she looked over at Sage. “That’s what I see when I look at you. Someone that God has great and wonderful plans for, plans you wouldn’t believe if He told you. And Satan is trying everything in his power to take you out before you figure that out.”

Sage shrugged. “I’m nothing special, not really.”

“Oh, I wouldn’t be so sure about that.”

“Why not?”

“Because I see it in your eyes.”

“What? That I think I’m better than everyone else?”

“No. That you know you’re not.”

She shook her head as she continued to stir. “That makes no sense.”

“Doesn’t it?” Mrs. Mitchell narrowed her eyes. “God can’t use someone who is stuffed full of themselves, but someone who is empty, someone who is humble? He can do all kinds of miracles through that person.”

“But I was…”

“Conceited? Arrogant? Proud?”

“Yeah.”

“And now?”

Thinking through her spirit now hurt.

“Blessed are the poor in spirit, Sage. Blessed are the ones who know they have to rely on God and God alone. I’m not trying to preach a sermon here, but when I look at you, I see someone who is so close to getting it, and I just want to explain it so you hear it. You are a beautiful young woman, on the outside, yes. But you are also so very beautiful on the inside. You don’t know that yet, you don’t trust it yet, but you are.”

“Everyone else…”

Mrs. Mitchell waved that away. “Gosh, if I listened to what everyone else says, I wouldn’t even be standing here. I wouldn’t be married to the man of my dreams. In fact, I’d probably be stoned out in some drug house or dead. Everyone else doesn’t get to make your decisions. You do. You and God. In fact, only two people get a vote on your worth—you and God. And your vote doesn’t even count.” She laughed. “That’s another one Steve told me about sixty-two gajillion times before I started believing him.

“Oh, honey, when I first became the preacher’s wife, I was so freaked out, I couldn’t put two sentences together to save my life. I just knew everyone was looking at me and judging me. I knew they were saying, ‘Now why on earth would a good preacher like him marry a loser like her?’”

“You’re not a loser.”

“No. But I sure thought I was. Satan had me convinced I was, and so that’s how I lived. For the first five years of our marriage, I lived in mortal fear that they would find out the truth about me.”

“Did they?”

“No. But I finally did. One day the senior pastor’s wife at our first church took me aside. She was an amazing lady, had lived in the church most of her life. She knew I was struggling something awful and that Steve was worried sick about me. So she took me out to lunch one day, just the two of us, and she told me a little about her story, which had a whole bunch of bumps and bruises too. I guess I needed that, to know I wasn’t the only one trying to live up to an image that was impossible to meet. I always remember her saying this because it shocked me so badly at the time that a senior pastor’s wife would say such a thing, but I remember her saying, ‘Jane, the baseline, hardcore truth about you is that you are a Child of the King. Nothing else in Heaven or on earth can touch that or change that or diminish that. The only thing that can keep you from walking in it is if you refuse to claim it, but that’s your choice, not His.’

“I had held myself back from accepting the grace God was trying to give me. It was like I would accept salvation but not the freedom that came with it. Freedom from my past, from my parents’ mistakes, from who I was and who everyone thought I was. He didn’t care about any of that. All He wanted was for me to accept the love and acceptance and worth that came from being His child. That was His choice to give it to me. All I had to do was accept the offer.

“I can’t say it was easy because the truth is it was a mighty long and bumpy road, but it has been the best thing I’ve ever done. Today, I’m a different person, or maybe I’m the me I really always was. Now, I reach out to help even if I don’t always know what the outcome might be. I listen and I give hugs because I know that God is trying to give other people what He’s already given me. But you’ve got to accept it. Not because you deserve it. None of us deserve it but because you really get what He’s done for you, what He’s offering you.”

“Smells wonderful,” Pastor Steve said from the doorway, and they both jumped. “You two needing any help?”

Mrs. Mitchell looked at Sage and smiled. “No. I think we’re good.”

How many times could one visit the pastor’s house, and did it ever become something that felt natural? Luke had no answers to those questions as he climbed those steps and knocked. He’d left the jacket at home tonight, so his hand went up to his other arm because he felt incredibly underdressed. However, underdressed became the least of his problems when Sage showed up to open the door.

“Hey,” she said with a light in her eyes and a smile on her lips. Dark jeans and a reddish top that showed off her arms and her hair yanked his willpower to its knees.

“Hey.” He ducked feeling every bit the sloppy-copy next to her easy perfection. Strangely, she didn’t even seem to notice as she dove into his arms for a hug.

“I’m glad to see you’re still in one piece.”

Luke lifted his arms in verification of that fact. “Me too.”

“Come on. I hope you like meatloaf.”

“Sounds great.”

In no time they were back around that little table saying grace and digging in.

“Sage tells me you’ve been shingling,” Pastor Steve said.

“Yeah, Mr. Conrad’s barn, except today he had me fixing most everything else too.”

“Oh?”

“The slats on his shed, the roof on the doghouse, the window in his hay barn.” Luke shook his head. “Not that I mind. Made some good money, but it’s crazy how many things can fall apart when you’re not watching them.”

“So you enjoy that kind of work?” Pastor Steve asked.

Luke shrugged. “Sometimes it’s tough. Being up on the roof when it’s crazy hot, that can be a pain. But mostly, it’s not really work. I like doing stuff like that. It’s a whole lot better than school that’s for sure.”

“Are you ready for school?” Mrs. Mitchell asked, and Luke’s gaze tripped over to Sage’s and then fell.

“I’m kind of enjoying the summer.”

As the meal wound down, Sage noticed how calm her spirit was. Even though Luke hadn’t asked them yet and that was still up in the air, she wasn’t fidgety or nervous. He would get to it, and it was almost a sure bet they would say yes. It was strange how unstrange everything felt. She couldn’t remember being in a space in life that felt like this.

When Mrs. Mitchell got the bucket of ice cream from the freezer, Sage got the bowls and handed them out. Ice cream with the preacher on a Saturday night. When had this happened? And yet, as she thought about it, there were so many far worse options.

“Hm.” Luke cleared his throat before putting his spoon to the Rocky Road. “I was going to ask you both.”

And all gazes save for Sage’s went over to him.

“My niece’s birthday is tomorrow, and well, we’re having a party for her at my folks’ house. I was wondering.” His gaze came over to Sage. “Well, I’d love to take Sage to it if you all don’t mind.”

“Mind?” Mrs. Mitchell said as she looked at her husband. “I think that sounds wonderful.”

“Is it after services?” her husband asked.

“Oh, yes,” Luke said quickly. “Around noon.”

“I don’t see why not,” he said, and then he looked at Sage. “That is if Sage wants to.”

Her gaze came up in complete shock. They were all looking at her. “Yeah-yes. Of course, I want to.”

The pastor smiled and nodded. “Then it’s settled.”

Half a second after Mrs. Mitchell declared herself full, Luke was on his feet gathering the dishes.

“Oh, Luke, you don’t have to,” she protested.

“Oh, I’m not,” he said, and he grinned at Sage. “Sage owes me.”

She looked up at him, puzzled and then realizing. “I didn’t mean this meal.”

“You said the meal. This was a meal.”

Sage opened her mouth to protest.

Mrs. Mitchell put her hands in the air. “I’m not asking. If you need help, let me know.”

Standing as she shook her head, Sage gathered more dishes and went to the sink as the Mitchells vacated the kitchen. There was no dishwasher, so without comment, she turned on the water and went under the sink looking for the dish soap. By the time she came back up, Luke had brought even more over to her, stacking them all next to the sink. “It was worth it, Sage,” she muttered to herself. “It was worth it.”

He stepped up beside her, glancing back to make sure the others were gone. “You talking to yourself?”

“Trying to remember what I got out of this.” She squirted the liquid soap into the rising water.

“Oh, yeah? What was that?”

Her gaze trailed up to his. “Dancing with you.” She shrugged and then smiled. “Totally worth it.”

That pushed Luke’s heart off a cliff and set it to soaring. “You know you’re getting good at this.”

“What’s that? Washing dishes?”

“No. Making me think you actually mean stuff like that.”

This time her gaze held more concern. “What does that mean?”

He shrugged. “You’re you. I’m me. I’m trying to remember that someday, you’re going to figure that out.”

Hands already in the suds, Sage turned to him and tipped her head as she surveyed him. Her hands never moved until he finally looked down at her, and his movement stopped.

“What?” he asked as if he really didn’t know.

A second and she looked down at the dishwater. “No lying over dishes, right?”

The reply didn’t come immediately.

“Right?” she repeated, looking up at him.

He sighed. “Yeah. No lying over dishes.”

She pulled her hands out and leaned her hip on the sink. “Okay. So I’m just curious why you think that. What makes you think I would be the one to drop you, that I would even think about it?”

Without really looking at her, Luke grabbed a dishtowel. “Well, I think that’s kind of obvious, don’t you?”

“Uh, no. Actually, I don’t.” She wound her gaze down and up again until it connected with his. “Want to explain it to me?”

He shrugged. “It’s just… It would be easy to believe this was going to last, but then I look at you, and I remember who I am, and…”

Reaching over, she dried her hands on the towel in his. His gaze was still nowhere near hers, so she put her hands on his face and angled it upward until it connected with hers.

“Who you are?” she asked softly, tenderly. “You mean the guy who came and rescued me from the pit? The guy who has never let me get by with all the lies everyone else believed without question? The guy who has stood by me and protected me and fought for me—no matter what showed up? That guy?”

However, his gaze was full of vulnerability when it searched hers. “Look, the truth is, I’m never going to be the guy who gets dressed up in a suit and goes in to the office. I’m not, Sage. I wear this to work.” He held out his hands from his clothes. “I carry a hammer and nails, not a Blackberry and computer printouts.”

“And this matters why?”

“Because you deserve that guy, Sage. You deserve to go to the best restaurants and have your husband show up with diamonds for your anniversary.”

“Seriously?” Sage couldn’t believe what she was hearing. “A month ago, I thought I deserved a guy like Rory Harris who only liked me so he could show me off to his friends.” She tipped her head again. “Where is this coming from?”

“Nowhere. Forget I said anything.”

But it wasn’t that easy. She never wanted him to feel inferior. Inferior? Like he was…

Suddenly she had a thought. “Just a second.”

“Where’re you…?” he asked as she headed out the door. “Hey, there’s still dishes.”

Sage marched out into the living room where a very surprised Mrs. Mitchell looked up from her reading. “Can I borrow this for a sec?” She pointed to the tea cup.

Mrs. Mitchell raised her eyebrows. “Uh, sure. Just be careful with it.”

If she hadn’t been so serious, Sage would have laughed. She picked it up and bracing it against her ribs took it back to him.

In her absence, Luke had started washing the dishes. He already had three plates in the sink.

She went right around him and held the tiny porcelain cup up. “You see this?”

He looked over and put the fourth plate in. “Yeah. It’s the tea cup the pastor was showing us.”

“No. It’s you.”

Hands in the suds, he tilted his head. “Me?”

“Yep. You see this?” Expertly she tipped it up to show the base. “What’s that?”

“A chip.”

“You see this?” She turned it. “What’s that?”

“Another chip.”

“Right. So I guess that means this isn’t worth keeping. I’ll just go pitch it.”

“Sage! What’re you…?” He gasped in horror as she headed for the trash where she turned, the tea cup poised over the bin.

“What?” she asked as if she had no comprehension of his panic. “It’s not worth anything. You said so yourself. It’s chipped. Why would we want to keep something that’s chipped? Really, we should just pitch it.” She made as if she was going to drop the thing.

Without wiping his hands on anything other than his jeans, Luke got to her in three steps. “Have you lost your mind? Pastor Steve would kill you if you trashed that.”

But she wasn’t backing down as she held the thing over the trash. “Why?”

“Because he loves it. That’s why.”

“But it has chips.”

Now he was both confused and worried. “Didn’t you hear him? It’s the chips that make it… Oh.” Nodding as his gaze fell, and Luke stepped back and put his hand on the back of his head. Another second and he pulled both arms up to cross them at his chest. Then he shrugged. “But that’s just a tea cup. It’s not…”

“You’re right. This is just a tea cup, and you are so much more than a tea cup.” Sage carefully set the thing on the table and put her arms up over his shoulders even as his gaze stayed on the floor. A second and his fists went to his hips as he looked up and away from her.

“Now you listen to me,” she said firmly. “I love that you work with your hands. I like how much people trust you with their stuff. It makes me feel like I can trust you too.”

His gaze was everywhere but on her. “But I’m not…”

“Not what? Perfect?” She smiled and then laughed. “Join the club. Besides, I’ll be honest, I’ve been with a lot of guys, Luke Baker, and let me tell you, you blow every one of them out of the water. I don’t care about all that stuff—college and offices. I don’t care about business suits and Blackberries. I care about you. You, Luke Baker, just like you are.”

His gaze slid down to hers then, and it asked questions he never voiced.

“You are truly an amazing guy, and I only hope that someday, we can have a kitchen like this one, and we can be standing in it doing our own dishes.” Tip-toeing, she kissed him lightly. “Because let me tell you, I like how you handle a dish towel.” With this kiss, she lingered on his lips until finally, he came to her and returned it.

In the next heartbeat, his arms came around her and she knew the fragile, vulnerable, pricelessness of the soul she now held. It was a responsibility and a privilege she would never again take for granted.

After the dishes were finished, Luke and Sage went for a walk to the little park just a few blocks from the pastor’s house. The evening had turned cool, so it was the perfect excuse for him to put his arm around her.

“Did you get your grandma’s dresser fixed?” she asked, just ambling. She liked this. A car here, a car there. Nobody rushing to get anywhere. Slow and calming. She’d never really felt that before.

“Fixed and delivered. You’d never know those handles weren’t original.”

“So what’re you working on now?”

“Couple of things. I need to get Mrs. Iverson’s chairs done, and Randy’s got a few more calf hutches to fix.”

At the park, Sage climbed up onto one the half barrels that was buried in the dirt and swung her legs so they were on either side of the thing. When Luke did the same behind her, she leaned back into the solidity of him, liking how perfectly safe his arms felt. “So, I’m curious. What do you want to do… after next year I mean?”

He sighed, and she felt it go all the way through her. “My uncle owns a construction company in Greely. I’ve thought about seeing if he needs help, or if he knows somebody who does.”

“So like what? Houses and things?”

“Mostly I think he does commercial stuff—businesses, schools, that kind of thing.”

“What do your parents think?”

“Dad’s cool with it, but I think Mom would really like me to go to school somewhere. I don’t know. Part of me says, I should go to school, and part of me says I will hate it as much as I do now, that it will be a complete waste of time, and that when I get out, what I want to do is this anyway.”

Gently Sage traced her hand down his resting on her ribs. “It wouldn’t hurt to ask, would it? Just find out from your uncle. Have you ever done that?”

This sigh told her no, he hadn’t. “I kept thinking I would have more time, but now, it’s like all of a sudden, I have to make a decision. I’m trying not to freak out, but sometimes…”

Sage thought through everything he was telling her. “So why today? Why’s this coming up now?”

It was almost as if he had completely stopped breathing. “You want the truth?”

“Please.”

Then he let out that breath. “I wanted to get you something, something one of your boyfriends in Hollywood would get you.”

That picked her up off of him, and she spun so that her knee touched his thigh. “I don’t have any boyfriends in Hollywood. Those guys are jerks.”

However, Luke was no longer looking at her. “I know, but you’re used to fancy cars and restaurants. I pick you up and we go to a bonfire and drink someone else’s Cokes.” He shrugged. “I just wanted to be able to give you something nice, something special.”

Very nearly slipping off the edge of the barrel, Sage scooted closer to him. “You already have.”

When his gaze came up to hers, she couldn’t fathom the depth of helplessness there.

“That stuff?” she said. “It’s just stuff.”

“But the necklaces and earrings…”

“Do you know what my mother would do to me if she saw me like this?” Sage picked up her hands and splayed them up in front of him. “She’d probably shoot me. Not a bracelet or an earring to be found. Gasp!” She put her hands to her open mouth and then dropped them to the cool yellow metal. “And you know what? I couldn’t care less. Do I love a simple pearl string that makes me feel like Audrey Hepburn? What girl doesn’t? But I don’t need a drawer full of diamonds to know you love me. I know it when you look at me and when you hold me.”

“But…”

“No. Luke. Seriously.” She shook herself because she couldn’t believe she would ever tell him this. “Okay, when I got here, I thought it was insane to eat in the kitchen. I couldn’t believe no one had maids. I had never done a dish in my life. But now I’m realizing, this is real.” She put her hand on his. “You are real. I’m real. This is real. Do I want to starve? No. But I’d much rather have you than some guy who could buy me something that I’ll put in the drawer and never wear twice.”

His gaze came up, but he didn’t look like he believed her.

“Love isn’t about the things. It’s about this.” She picked his hand up in hers and held it between them. “Am I getting it all right? No. Will I ever? Probably not. But this is real, no mirrors. In fact, today when I was reading the Bible, I asked the pastor to show me that verse you read that time again, and it says, ‘For now we see a reflection like in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.’ Something like that. And I get it now. I see it now. Before I was just this reflection. I wasn’t real. Now, with you, I can be me. This me. No necklace. No earrings. No diamonds. Just me. And the crazy thing is, right here, where I feel most known, I also feel the most loved. Ugh.”

She put her head back because she could tell if she wasn’t putting this so he would hear it and understand it or not.

“I get it,” he said softly. “For you, but you’re amazing. Underneath all that stuff is amazing. With me…” He shrugged. “I’m just me.”

Sage had never wanted to hug someone or to smack someone more in her life. “And that’s who you should be. Just you. Whatever that means.” She let out a breath. “And as far as the restaurant thing goes, believe me, I had way more fun at the antique shop.”

“Yeah, right.”

“I did, and I have the pictures to prove it. You want to see?” Reaching into her pocket, she went for her phone.

“Your parents are going to hate me.”

That stopped her. “My parents love you.”

But he shook his head, and his shoulders slumped even further. “Not the ones here although I’m probably not on the top of their list at the moment either.”

It killed her to see what her life was doing to him. She stopped the phone search. “Well, if it makes you feel any better, they hate me too.”

His gaze came over to her in concern, but she shrugged.

“What? They do.” Then she narrowed her eyes thinking things through. “Look, I’m not going to try to be Miss Merry Sunshine over all of this, but I’m also not going to keep letting them decide what is best and right for me. They’ve done that my whole life, and I’ve let them because I thought they knew best. Jason was a successful businessman with untold millions in some off-shore bank account. Mom was this high-powered lawyer. Except I don’t even know if any of that was even real. For all I know, Jason’s in debt up to his eyeballs, and Mom’s about to have a meltdown.

Her gaze fell then, and she took a breath and shook her head. “What I do know is that I like myself like this. I like having you over for supper and not having to call the caterer to impress you. I like just sitting out here talking. Okay, granted before I came here, I would have thought this was death itself. I would’ve said it was lame and made fun of anyone who did it. But now… here… I don’t know.”

“What happens if you go back?”

A knife went through her heart at even the thought. “I don’t know. I really don’t. I wish I could tell you I’ll never leave, but… I look into the future, and it’s all just kind of blurry right now. The scary thing is I don’t even have any control over any of it. They could send me back tomorrow if they wanted.”

His gaze jerked up and she nodded.

“I know. Right? I try not to think about it, but they could.”

“But they said…” he started.

She nodded again. “They say a lot of things.” Then she realized making him hold on when she had no guarantee wasn’t fair. Yes, she loved him, but maybe that included having to let him go. Her heart jerked at the very thought of saying the words, but she had to say them. This had to be his choice. “Look, I don’t have any answers, Luke. I don’t. I don’t have a map for where this goes or a clue of what’s going to happen in the next month or the next year, or even the next week. I love you. You know that, but if you need someone who is stable and permanent. Right now, that’s not me, and I’m not sure it ever will be.”

Luke heard what she was saying. He wanted something she simply could not give him. “Do you ever get scared… about the future?”

“When I think about it? Yeah. I do.”

“Do you ever wonder if you’ll be able to do it? The wife, the kids, the job, the white picket fence?”

“Other than the wife… yeah.” She smiled at that and laughed when he did.

“It just all feels so overwhelming.” His words were so soft almost drown out by the breeze. “What you’re going to do? Are you going to college? Where? To do what?” He shrugged and pulled his arms up to his chest. “Sometimes I just feel so small, like I’m six and I want to go crawl in bed with Mom and Dad because they can make it all go away.”

Sage tipped her head. “Did you do that? Go crawl in bed with them?”

“Sometimes when I was little.” He leaned back. “Why?”

“I want my kids to be able to do that, to come crawl in bed with me and know they’re safe, that they don’t have to face everything on their own.”

He smiled at that. “What else do you want?” Then he put his hands between them and pushed himself up straight.

And for the next hour, Sage told him everything her heart had ever whispered, things she had never told Pate or Mac, things she hadn’t even admitted to herself. What Luke noticed the most was how very similar her dreams were to his and how simple hers seemed in the face of everything she had grown up with. He didn’t know how they would make it work or if life would even let them try, but as they sat and talked, he couldn’t deny how deeply he had fallen for her.

When the clock said it was time to go, Luke helped her off the barrel and waited for her to situate herself on planet Earth again. As they turned back for the preacher’s, he put his arm around her, and as much as he had tried to talk himself out of it, he couldn’t deny how right that felt. “I know there aren’t any guarantees,” he said, his gaze sliding far out to the horizon. “And I know God’s got a plan.”

Sage nodded as she walked alongside him, holding his hand on her shoulder like she always did.

“And maybe that’s the answer—to trust Him and not freak out.”

She laughed. “Easier said than done, huh?”

He smiled down at her. “Oh, yeah. Definitely. I don’t know, I guess most of all, I’m just afraid of losing you, like I’m going to wake up and this was all a dream or something.”

“For what it’s worth, I worry about that too. I’m trying not to, but sometimes…”

Pulling her closer, he kissed her hair. “I hear you, girl. I hear you.”

Chapter 32

“Sage, sweetheart,” Mrs. Mitchell said the next morning as Sage sat at the little mirror telling herself it would be okay. Hair down, minimal make-up, the blue and green watercolor dress she’d worn two weeks before gracing her body. How could one be so incredibly nervous about something as simple as church?

“Yeah… yes?” She faltered on the word, swallowing down the panic.

“We have oatmeal if you want breakfast.”

“Oh, boy,” Sage breathed less than excited about the food choice, then she called, “I’ll be there in a minute.”

Gazing at herself, she closed her eyes and willed the panic down. “You told him you could do no jewelry. You told him that would be all right.” So why did she feel like she was stripped naked and about to be burned at the stake for violating some critical rule? “You can do this, Sage. You can do this.”

Luke got to the church early, but of course, he didn’t beat the Mitchells. If ever Sage had felt on display, this would be it. There was no running from the situation, no way to mask it from the congregation. Surely they all knew by now, but if they didn’t before, they certainly would by the time they left. His heart dipped at the knowledge that she would be in full Sage Hollywood mode this morning. Bracing himself for just that, he walked into the lobby and nearly stopped breathing altogether. Whoa. She was not Sage Hollywood, and he was pretty sure no one in the church was going to miss that fact.

She stood next to Mrs. Mitchell by the fireplace, shaking hands with those who came in greeting. She looked like a regal princess—100 percent poise, charm, and graciousness. Zero percent fake. Amazing didn’t even come close.

From next to Mrs. Mitchell, Sage saw him come in, but she didn’t know the protocol for the situation. Should she wave to him? Indicate that she had seen him? Pretend like she hadn’t? As Mr. Conrad stepped over to Mrs. Mitchell, Sage took the opportunity to catch Luke’s eye and smile. She ducked because the gleam in his eyes told her he very much approved.

Just then the outside door opened, and four faces she loved walked in. Not one of them, save for Ryder looked at all happy about being there. One look and Ryder pushed past Luke to come over to her. Heedless of who saw or why, Ryder put his arms around her and hugged her to him. With no trouble or hesitation, Sage returned the hug.

“Hey, there, big guy,” she said. “How’s it going?”

“They said you hadn’t left. I’m so glad you’re still here.” He backed up. “Can you come play ball again today?”

Sage’s heart broke for the fragile hope in his eyes that she was required to crush. Reaching up, she tousled his hair. “Probably not today, but maybe next week sometime.”

“Okay.” Ryder scuffed the toe of his shoes into the tiles.

“Hi, Ryder,” Mrs. Mitchell said, and he greeted her.

It was clear when Sage looked up that no one else in her family would dare to make the trek across the lobby to say hi. Not that she expected anything different, but it hurt knowing everyone in the whole room saw her for the outcast she was.

“We should be going in soon.” Mrs. Mitchell leaned over to her, lowering her voice to the point of nearly nothing. “We’ll sit up front.”

Up front? Sage barely kept herself standing. She had to be joking. She was joking, right? Somebody say she was joking!

Firmly tucked away by Trent as they made the final preparations for the service in the back, Luke’s gaze snapped to her and Mrs. Mitchell when they walked in and all the way down to the front. How Sage didn’t melt from the gazes turning her way and the whispers that accompanied them, he would never know. Still, she kept her head up and her steps measured.

“God,” he prayed softly, bending his head when she sat down in the front pew, “You and I both know she needs You. Please, please be with her. Don’t let any evil near her. Guard her heart from believing what the others say.”

“Ready?” Trent said, indicating the back pew, and Luke thought as he sat that he would far rather be back here than up there.

“Yeah.”

Breathe, Sage. Just breathe. It was astounding how difficult that was. Even as the woman came forward to read, Sage willed the panic and anxiety down. Somehow she had never envisioned being the cracked tea cup on display for everyone, but somehow, that’s exactly where she had ended up.

The woman opened the book and began.

“From 1 Peter, Chapter 5. ‘Therefore, I exhort the elders among you, as your fellow elder and witness of the sufferings of Christ, and a partaker also of the glory that is to be revealed, shepherd the flock of God among you, exercising oversight not under compulsion, but voluntarily, according to the will of God; and not for sordid gain, but with eagerness; nor yet as lording it over those allotted to your charge, but proving to be examples to the flock. And when the Chief Shepherd appears, you will receive the unfading crown of glory. You younger men, likewise, be subject to your elders; and all of you, clothe yourselves with humility toward one another, for God is opposed to the proud, but gives grace to the humble.

Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you at the proper time, casting all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you. Be of sober spirit, be on the alert. Your adversary, the devil, prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. But resist him, firm in your faith, knowing that the same experiences of suffering are being accomplished by your brethren who are in the world. After you have suffered for a little while, the God of all grace, who called you to His eternal glory in Christ, will Himself perfect, confirm, strengthen and establish you. To Him be dominion forever and ever. Amen.”

The Amen stuck in Sage’s throat, and it was impossible not to squirm. Breathe, Sage. Breathe.

A moment and the pastor stood. He read a short reading from John and then closed the book, preparing for the sermon. In the back Luke’s prayers for her continued.

“Dominion,” Pastor Steve said slowly. “Strange word. An old word perhaps. We don’t use it much anymore, and we think we know what it means. ‘Domin’ is Latin for master or lord, and as we remember, in the Garden of Eden, Adam was given dominion over all that God had created. The problem with this word is we tend to think of it in the world’s terms so that a master or lord is over whatever is being dominated.

“But you cannot take Scripture and slice it up, and say, ‘It means this.’ You have to look at it as a whole to understand the fullness of what God intended. So if Jesus is the new Adam, and Jesus was there at creation and all things were made through Him, then He is rightly our Lord and our Master. In fact, you can’t see it, but in the reading that Eilene read, the words ‘Chief Shepherd’ are capitalized, clearly indicating it is referring to Jesus who is our shepherd and our master. Those two images come together in the Person of Jesus Christ.” Pastor Steve laced his fingers in front of himself. “They are not two facets of Jesus. They are intertwined, and when we view them as such, we begin to see just what God is calling us to.”

He shifted and took hold of the podium. “You see, Jesus Christ is at once our Shepherd and our Master, but here’s where you have to be very careful. Jesus clearly does not consider Himself a Master in the world’s sense. He does not take the position of dominating when He exercises authority over those in His dominion. Instead, He is like a Shepherd, caring for the flock, guiding the flock, defending the flock. The flock does not serve Him, rather He serves the flock.

“You see, most religions of the world are designed with the god at the top and everyone else serves that god. Jesus Christ came and He absolutely flipped that paradigm on its head so that those who would have dominion over something become the servants, not the one served. To become a master in Jesus’ model, the elders of the church become those who willingly lay down their lives and become humble examples for those in their charge.

“Notice here what Peter, the one who would help to establish Jesus’ church says, ‘humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you at the proper time, casting all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you. Be of sober spirit, be on the alert. Your adversary, the devil, prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. But resist him, firm in your faith, knowing that the same experiences of suffering are being accomplished by your brethren who are in the world. After you have suffered for a little while, the God of all grace, who called you to His eternal glory in Christ, will Himself perfect, confirm, strengthen and establish you.

“My brothers and sisters in Christ, we are to recognize that God has dominion over all, and He is on our side. He wants your life to count for something, to mean something. He is working for that to happen. Think about it. The God of the Universe is on our sides, and He wants to have dominion over your life—not so He can lord it over you, but so He can be your Shepherd, your guide, your protector from the enemy who seeks to devour you. Yes, in this life we suffer. Yes, in this life there are trials, but God Who is our Master, Who is our Shepherd, is right here with us to bring us through those trials so that He can perfect us, confirm us, strengthen us, and establish us as a part of His Kingdom, yes in Heaven but even more so, here on earth.

“Accepting Jesus as your savior is a great first step, but then you’ve got to decide what do to with that. The next step is to learn to walk with Him in humility and grace. You’ve got to reach your roots down into Him, into His love for you and His strength and wisdom, and then you reach out to your world and bring Him wholeheartedly into the situations where there is suffering and hopelessness and oppression. Those situations where the enemy thinks he has a foothold or a stronghold, where darkness has taken over. You step into those situations and you let God Who is working through your life begin to be the light in that darkness. Having Jesus in your life is not a license to lord anything over anyone. It is a calling to learn to shepherd those in your care, to be a Jesus-model master to those He has entrusted to you.

“This is not a small calling. It is not a calling to take lightly or to let get lost in the hurry of life. It is sacred. In fact, it is so sacred that if you really understand it, it will truly drive you to your knees because you know you cannot accomplish it on your own. But God set you in dominion over your piece of this world, His world, as a steward for those and of those who are your responsibility, and He will perfect that which He has given to you. He wants to perfect it, He longs to perfect it in His love. And He will… if you will let Him.”

After the service, Sage waited with Mrs. Mitchell as she talked to each and every member who stopped to talk with her. Over and over, her hostess introduced her, and each time Sage noticed how the person would put the pieces together, react without reacting and then smile in deference to Mrs. Mitchell. It hurt that she was dragging her hosts down, but she could think of nothing to do other than shake the offered hands and be as polite as possible.

However, the other thing that she began to notice as they got to the back and out to the lobby was how thoroughly Mrs. Mitchell seemed not to be at all bothered by the situation or by Sage or by the confused and knowing looks they received. Seemingly perfectly at ease with all of it, Mrs. Mitchell neither made it look like an act nor like a chore. She seemed genuinely kind without even a hint of embarrassment or apology.

Of course, her family didn’t make any attempt to acknowledge her, but the free-flowing acceptance of first Mrs. Mitchell and then of the Pastor himself almost made her feel as if she belonged. She was helping Mrs. Mitchell straighten the front desk when Luke came bounding down the steps, and she couldn’t stop the smile.

“Hey, you about ready?” he asked, clapping his hands, a light of excitement in his eyes.

Although Sage’s nerves weren’t anywhere near his excitement, she lifted her shoulders and looked at Mrs. Mitchell. “Do you need anything else?”

“Oh, no. Of course not. Go on. And tell Alyssa happy birthday for us.”

Sage looked back at him. “Then I guess I’m ready.”

With a smile, he reached over and took her hand although there were still others milling about. Heading to the door, he waved at the pastor.

“Have her home at a decent hour,” the pastor said with a smile.

“Will do.”

And together, they broke out into the sunshine beyond. Sage loved this space in life. Just being with him was always so easy. He helped her in and came around to get in himself. However, before he started the car, he angled his gaze over to her.

“How was that?”

Sage let her eyes go wide. “Intimidating.”

He laughed and took her hand again. “You did great. Oh, and I love the outfit.” With a wink he started the car and off they went to their next overwhelming adventure.

Luke had thought the day would be mostly low-key, but when they walked into the kitchen, worry slapped into him. His mother was cooking, her best Sunday clothes still on, calling instructions to Hannah and Priscilla who were in the living room.

“The streamers are in the pantry,” his mother yelled. “Top right corner. Use the white and pink ones.”

“Hey,” Luke said in concern.

“Oh, Luke. Thank goodness.” His mother clanked a lid on something. “Can you help your sisters? I was going to decorate the table and the living room, but the cake was late and now dinner’s behind. Your dad got called out on a job. He was going to help me.”

“I don’t see them!” Hannah yelled.

“Top right!” her mother yelled back. “By the red and black ones from your graduation!”

At Luke’s elbow, Sage cowered, and although Luke had been a part of the craziness his whole life, he knew she hadn’t. He took her hand. “We’ll go help them.”

“Thank you.”

Following him, hoping no one would yell at her, Sage fully understood the panic when they stepped into the living room. A huge bouquet of balloons verily blocked the doorway, and it looked like a pink clown had thrown up in the room itself.

“Wow,” Luke said when he saw the place.

“We don’t need any critiques,” Priscilla said in the middle of a sea of fuchsia pink tissue swirls.

“I don’t see it!” Hannah yelled again from the back hallway, making Sage jump.

“It’s right…”

“I’ll get it,” Luke said and let Sage’s hand go to help his sister.

Standing there, she felt both in the way and completely useless.

“Ugh! If I never see pink again, it will be too soon.” Priscilla arched her neck and rolled it around her shoulders.

“Do… do you need some help?” Sage asked, not at all sure that her help would be welcome.

“How are you with tissue paper?”

“Uh. Good?” Sage ventured one small step over to the piano where Priscilla was seated. Gingerly folding herself onto the floor, she picked up one of the packages stacked there. “What’re we doing with these?”

“Mom wanted them hung from the ceiling with the streamers going out from them, but I don’t think we’re even going to get them pulled apart at this rate.”

“She said to the right, not behind,” Hannah said. “Besides how was I supposed to even see it back there?” Coming into the room, she stopped short when her gaze snagged on Sage, now sitting in the middle of the floor studiously separating the accordion-like tissue paper. “Oh. Hey, Sage.”

“Hey,” Sage said barely looking up.

“URGH!” Priscilla moaned. “This stuff is impossible. I ripped another one.”

“How hard can it be?” Without pretense, Luke sat down right next to Sage and grabbed a pack.

“Maybe you should help Hannah,” Sage said without really looking up. “This stuff is kind of delicate.”

“Delicate? I can be delicate.” He ripped into a bag.

“Yeah,” Priscilla said, standing. “Good luck with that. I’ll help Hannah. You two can have fun with that stuff.”

“Gee thanks,” Sage said, pursing her lips together willing the paper not to tear.

“Now how do you do this anyway?” Luke asked. He flipped the thing over and then pulled the two small pieces of cardboard around. “Oh, cool.”

“Leave it to Luke to be excited by something like that,” Hannah said as she climbed the ladder, pink streamer in hand. “Here?”

“Looks good.” Priscilla handed her some tape.

“Oh, rats.” Luke stopped his work just as Sage got hers finished, fluffed it and set it aside. She grabbed another package as she glanced over at him, a torn piece now lying next to him.

“I told you. It’s not as easy as it looks.”

In minutes she had a second one done. She fluffed it and grabbed for another package.

“How do you do that?” he asked, and she fought not to laugh when she saw the anti-creation he was laboring over.

“You’ve got to go side-to-side and then back again.” She demonstrated as he watched shaking his head.

“That’s what I was doing.”

“No. You’ve got to do it evenly.”

“That looks like a sick ostrich,” Hannah said of the thing in his hand as she hung a streamer right over them.

“Thank you very much,” he retorted and held his work up. “There.”

Sage wound her lips under her teeth and fought not to say what she was thinking. A dead ostrich would be a step up from that thing.

“Wow. Do not put him on decorating duty at my wedding,” Priscilla said.

“Wedding? I didn’t know you were getting hitched.” Luke looked up at her. “Who’s the sucker?”

She reached down and whacked him with a full roll of streamer right on the top of the head.

“Here, darlin’,” Sage said as nicely as she could, using the endearment he always used with her. “Why don’t you help hang the streamers? I’ll get these.” She took the thing from him and lifted her eyebrows as she turned it around and around trying to figure out how to fix it. “Yikes.”

Hannah’s cell phone beeped, and standing on the ladder, she pulled it out. “Oh, man, they’re going to be here in 20 minutes.”

“Turbo time.” Luke jumped to his feet and took the streamer from Hannah. “Here, shorty. Give me that.”

“Ha. Ha.” But she didn’t have much of a choice, and with that all of them went into pink-decorating overdrive.

Even Sage was amazed when both the living room and the table looked perfectly perfect pink by the time Luke’s little niece and her family came through the door at noon-thirty.

“Happy Birthday!” they all called, and hugs went all around.

The young woman Sage decided must be Kara had sandy-blonde hair just a shade or two lighter than Luke’s. She was short like Hannah and obviously pregnant once again. Two kids for Luke to spoil. Sage smiled at that. If it was a boy, he could teach him to play baseball. Lucky kid.

“This is Sage,” Luke said after picking up Alyssa and giving his sister a hug. He stepped over to Sage, and when she looked up at him, with Alyssa in his arms, she wanted that to be her future so badly it made her heart jerk.

“It’s nice to meet you, Sage,” Kara said, a smile lighting her eyes.

“You too.” And then before she had the chance to prepare for it, Luke put his arm around her, and nothing in the world had ever, ever felt so right.

“Okay. This one is from your uncle Luke,” Luke said later as they all sat around the living room, Alyssa in the middle opening presents. His father had shown up right before dinner which was, of course, fabulous. The only way it could have been better was if Maddie had been able to make it. Graduate school two states away would do that to a person.

He smiled from his seat next to Sage on the couch as he wound an arm around her. She had been right at his side all afternoon, and he had come to the conclusion that his family was liking her almost as much as he did.

“Oh, Luke,” Kara said as she helped her daughter pull the little vest out. “It’s gorgeous! Where did you get it?”

Alyssa hopped up and down for her mother to put the item on her, and when it was on, it was, in fact, abundantly adorable.

“Sage made it,” he said, and every person in the room stopped to look at them.

“You made this?” Kara asked.

“Well, not made-made.” Sage shrunk next to him. “I just added the lace part.”

“It’s so cute,” Priscilla said. “I have the most adorable Godchild in the whole world.”

Spinning one way and the other Alyssa modeled it for them all.

“And this,” Luke said, leaning over and snatching the little box from the table to hand it to his sister, “is from Sage.”

“Oh, Sage,” Kara said.

“I…” Sage turned disbelieving eyes up at him.

“What?” He shrugged. “It was your idea.”

Sitting in her mother’s lap, Alyssa opened the small present and squealed when the little butterfly headpiece came into view.

“Oh!”

“It’s perfect.”

“Oh, Sage.”

Luke let the back of the couch catch him as he pulled Sage to him. “Told you they’d love it.” And right there with everyone watching, he pulled her closer and kissed her head.

She angled her gaze down and then picked it back up. “I hope you like it.”

“Put it on me. Put it on me. Put it on me,” Alyssa chorused, and they all laughed.

Luke grinned. “I think she likes it.”

“Seriously,” Hannah said as they all sat around talking later. “Mom never knew.”

Kara laughed from her place in the chair their mother had brought from the back bedroom. “I think Mom’s the one who likes pink.”

“And green,” Pricilla said. She looked at her sister and they both said, “Green!” and busted up laughing.

“I really don’t see how this is so funny,” their mother said, and Sage felt sorry for her.

“So, if you don’t like pink,” Sage said, “what color would you paint it?”

And just like that, the girls went into a painting color frenzy.

“You do know this means I’ll be stuck painting the rest of the summer,” Luke said, ducking to her.

Sage laughed and put her hand on his thigh. “Well, at least you’ll finally be good for something.”

“I love your family,” Sage said as they drove back to the pastor’s house long after the sun had gone down.

He smiled over at her. “I think the feeling is mutual.”

“It’s so weird because they don’t agree about everything, but you know they’re going to work it out. They really care about each other.”

“That’s what being a family is about.”

She smiled sadly. “Not where I come from.”

On the front porch Luke kissed her, telling her if his mother got paint, he was coming to get her the next morning. Sage laughed, half-hoping his mother would in fact show up with ten gallons or more. After one more kiss, she told him good night and let herself into the house.

It was dark in the front part, but in the living room, she found her hosts. Both on the couch watching some talent show and arguing about who should have gotten what score.

“So, how was the party?” Mrs. Mitchell asked a half-second after Sage came in the doorway, the argument forgotten, and somehow Sage heard underlying notes in that question she had never noticed before. She wasn’t asking just to ask or to find some fault with Sage’s use of the day, she was genuinely interested.

Feeling just two steps on the right side of completely safe, Sage sat down in the chair, fully prepared to bolt if either of them so much as looked at her funny. “Great. Everyone but Maddie was there. Alyssa was darling. They’re such a great family.” She sounded wistful even to her own ears.

A second, a glance, and Mrs. Mitchell turned down the volume on the television. “You okay?”

Another second and Sage put her head down. She hadn’t realized she was holding the thoughts in so tight a rein. “I guess it just makes me wonder, you know? I never really thought that kind of family was real, like it was just some fantasy. But they’re real. They’re not perfect. But they don’t hold that against each other either.” She shook her head. “Even the parents. It’s like they’re all a team, working together. Like we got there today, and poor Mrs. Baker was trying to cook, and Hannah and Priscilla were putting up the decorations, and we just… helped, and they let us, and we all worked together and had fun even though we were all freaked out that we might not get it all done in time. It was really nice.”

She was talking, trying to sort it all out as she did so. Finally she stopped and looked up. “I’m rambling.”

“No.” Pastor Steve sat up. “I think you’re learning. Keep going. What else have you noticed?”

Thinking for a second, Sage smiled. “Well, they include everyone. Even Kara’s husband, Chris, who’s really quiet and kind of shy even. It’s like he’s him, and everyone’s okay with that. They don’t get mad if he doesn’t join in, but when he does, they include him.” She squinted into the thoughts. “It’s like you’re part of something that’s real. It’s not fake at all, none of it. It’s kind of like…” Sage trailed off as she looked up at them and thought better of saying that.

“Kind of like?” Mrs. Mitchell asked gently.

“It’s kind of like what I feel when I’m around you,” Sage said, looking only at Mrs. Mitchell and knowing this was probably revealing far too much about her thoughts about them and the situation. “Like today, at church.”

“How so?”

“You talk to everyone, and I’m sure there are people you don’t like or people who have been like mean to you or something. I mean, I know what they think of you for…”

Neither of them looked shocked or even concerned.

“For?” Pastor Steve finally said.

Sage played with her fingernails. “I know what they say about me, what they think about me, and I know what they’re probably saying about you for letting me stay here.”

A second and completely unbelievably Mrs. Mitchell smiled. “I learned a long time ago not to base my feelings and my actions on what others might think about me. They are going to think and say and do things that I have no control over. What I do have control over is where I’m standing in life, where I choose to be, who I choose to be, who I choose to help, and how I choose to help them. If they want to say something about it, that’s their deal not mine.”

For some reason, Sage wouldn’t have been surprised to hear that from the pastor, from Mrs. Mitchell, it was a surprise because she sounded so firm about it.

“Do you remember what Steve preached about today?”

Slowly Sage nodded. “About the master stuff and the shepherd stuff.”

“That’s right. See, I’ve learned that Jesus has called me to be a master and a shepherd too. I have a flock, the people at church that we minister to and my family and the people we work with outside the church like those who come for the meals. All of them are who God has given me to work with and to let Him work through me with them. So in a sense, I have dominion over them because God has given me those people as the ground I am supposed to tend for Him or with Him while I’m here. And so that’s what I do. I let Him love them through me. It’s not always easy, and without Him it would be impossible. But with Him, I’m learning more and more that people just want and need love. They don’t need my judgment or criticism. Their loads are heavy enough without me adding to it.”

“I never thought about it like that—like I have dominion over anything,” Sage said. “I always thought everyone had dominion over me. I mean isn’t the man supposed to do that?”

They looked at each other as if to ask who should answer that.

“Each of us,” Pastor Steve said, “is given areas to tend, things that only we can tend. Jane has hers. I have mine, and we each support and help the other with tending what we’ve been given.”

“You work as a team.”

He nodded. “Yes. Not that that’s always easy. She has her moments.”

Jane’s mouth fell open, and she hit his arm.

“See what I’m saying?” he asked and pointed at her, but he laughed and then put his arm around her. “We make a good team.”

His wife smiled and snuggled closer to him. “Yes we do.”

“So I have dominion over things in my life?” Sage asked, digging deeper. “I don’t just have to be dominated?”

Next to her husband, Jane laughed softly. “I prefer to take the dominated thing out of the equation. I prefer to say that I have people that God sends me to love, they are my flock, if you will. And together,” She took her husband’s hand. “we do our best to guide and keep and help and bless and love each and every one of them.”

Suddenly, Sage began to understand. “That’s why you took me in.”

A second and they both nodded.

“Your dad loves you very much,” Pastor Steve said. “He wanted you safe and well taken care of while he works some other things out in his own dominion.”

Sage put her head down. “He didn’t even say hello today.”

Pastor Steve pursed his lips. “I know, and we’re going to talk about that.”

“It scares me,” Sage said softly. “I don’t even really have a home right now.” She sniffed and ran her hand under her nose. “I think I’m the richest homeless girl in America.”

“For what it’s worth,” Jane said, “we’re all just lost little sheep until we find the Shepherd. It’s not the things or the money or even the people on this earth that define our identity. It’s God. Until you get Him, whatever you have will never be enough. Once you’re with Him, whatever you have—a lot or a little—will be plenty. I know that sounds crazy, but I can so remember growing up in the trailer park. I felt like I had nothing back then, that I was nothing, and then…” She picked her hand up and put it on her husband’s thigh. “God sent someone to my pasture who finally convinced me that because I was worth something just because I am a Child of the King, and none of that other stuff even matters. The truth is, once I accepted that, I was free. I was free of what my friends thought, I was free of what the world said about me, I was even free to marry this man who takes such good care of his flock, that I am so blessed to be a part of.” She leaned over, and he smiled and kissed her.

Pastor Steve’s gaze came over to Sage. “Sage, you are a Child of the King. He is the ultimate Shepherd of your pasture. The question is, what are you going to do with that? Are you going to brush it off and not treasure it, or are you going to embrace it and start living like it?”

“So today,” she said, strength, courage, and understanding building in her, “when we were at church, you stood by me because…”

Jane shrugged. “Any Child of my Father’s is worthy in my book.”

“And when you took me to sit up front, you weren’t embarrassed?”

“No.”

“Even though…”

“Sage, honey.” Jane sat forward. “If I was going to withhold my love and esteem from everyone who didn’t deserve it, there would be no one to give it to. We’re all sinners. We’ve all done stupid things and had stupid things done to us. The point is, my God is bigger than all of that. He can make all things new, and I know, whether you see it or believe it or not, He is working in your life, He is asking you to come to Him, to believe that He’s offering you Himself and through Him freedom. Not so you can do whatever you want but so that you are free to cling to Him and never let go because you see that His way, His love for you, works.”

“You know,” Sage said slowly, quietly. “I thought I was being punished getting sent here.”

They both smiled.

“And what do you think now?” Pastor Steve asked.

“I think I’m glad to be part of your pasture.”

Chapter 33

“I told you,” Luke said on Tuesday night as they talked over the phone. “She’s getting the paint tomorrow.”

Sage laughed at the dire notes in his voice. “Well, tell her to get some Killz for that pink, or we’ll never get it covered up.”

“We’ll?” he asked, and she laughed again.

“Yes, we’ll. Do you really think I would trust you painting your sisters’ rooms alone?”

“I can’t believe you agreed to this.” Luke stood over the buckets of paint in the garage on Wednesday morning, hands on hips, shaking his head.

Looking over the project, Sage pointed to the Killz. “We need to start with that on the pink. I don’t think we’ll need it on the green.” She lifted a paint can. “Did she say which color she wanted on which room?”

“She said something about a red accent wall in the green room?” He put his hand to his head and rubbed it there.

Sage nodded, thinking. “She’ll be back by noon, right?”

“That’s what she said.”

“Okay. Then we start with the Killz. Get that done first. Then we’ll call her if she’s not back yet.”

Strange, Luke thought as he watched her, how very solid she looked today. No giggles and shrinking back. More like she was leading an army, and he was the only soldier.

“So you get that,” she said, “and I’ll get the brushes, pans, and the roller.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

The first task was covering everything with plastic, which was much more challenging than it sounded. Sage was glad she hadn’t dressed up for the occasion. In fact, that morning when Jane saw what she was planning to wear, she had graciously loaned her a T-shirt and some old jeans. Knowing she was only out to impress Luke and his mother, Sage had accepted the gift, put her hair up, and told herself she was going for the grunge look. It was working.

“Okay, lift it real careful,” Luke instructed as they fought to position the thin plastic over the bed and dresser which were now planted in the middle of the room. “Up. Watch that side.”

“I got it.”

“Good, now get it as even as we can.” He put his side down, and she followed. When he stood, he put his hands on his hips. “Now to cover the edges. Mom says to tape it down. She said otherwise you make a mess on the baseboards.”

Sage wasn’t arguing as she ripped into the next plastic bundle. “You got the tape?”

“Right here.” He held it up and spun it around his finger.

“What’re you trying out for the rifle show?”

“That could be arranged.” Picking it up, he aimed it at the wall. “I would be good at it.” He spun the tape ‘gun’ on her. “Hands up, woman.”

“Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.” She pulled out the plastic. “Here.” And with that, she tossed him a package that he barely caught.

“Wow.”

Ripping into the bag she held, she extracted the plastic. “Here’s the way I figure it. You’re not going to kill me because if you did, you’d have to paint everything by yourself.”

He laughed as he put the tape down and tore into his own bag. “A very good point.”

She smiled at him and tipped her head. “I thought you’d see it my way. Now come on, let’s get this stuff down so we can have some fun with that paint.”

Three hours later, they were indeed having fun with the paint. Luke wasn’t totally sure what had come over her, but whatever it was, he liked it. Sometime around eleven, she had started singing. When he knew the words, he joined in; however, music and lyrics were clearly not his forte.

“… you’re making me!” she sang.

“… you’re baking me!” he sang.

She stopped, roller in hand and looked over at him with a scowl. “Baking? You’re baking me? What was that?”

“That’s what they say.”

“No, it’s not.” Sage went for more taupe-color paint. They had in fact had to call his mother after the Killz was up, and they were making very good progress. If this kept up, they’d be in the next room in no time. “It’s mmmmaking me. Making. Like MMMaybelline.” She rolled some more paint on the wall, stepped back, and then rolled some more.

“Maybelline? What does that have to do with anything?”

“The m sound. Not b, like baking. Baking me. That doesn’t even make any sense.”

Part of him was enjoying seeing her so serious about something so incredibly irrelevant. Just getting to spend so much time with her was an answer to prayers, and she was so laid back today. He was sure her friends wouldn’t even recognize her.

“You’re making me,” she sang and continued on with the song as he watched her, hand on hip rolling the paint up and down over the white.

She could make him do about anything these days.

His mother came home around 2:30 and went first to Hannah’s room. “Oh, it’s so beautiful!”

That brought both of them up from their brushes in the second room.

“You like it?” Sage asked as Luke followed her down the hall to where his mother stood on the threshold of the room.

“It’s so peaceful. So much better than the pink.” She turned. “How’s the other one coming?”

“Come see.” Sage led the little parade down the hall and turned in, splaying her arms out. “Ta-da!”

When his mother came in, Luke really thought she was about to start crying. “Oh. It’s wonderful. Are you going to do the red over there?”

“We are, and I was thinking.” Sage went to the window. “I don’t know what you were thinking for furniture, but a little bench seat right here with a cushion just lighter than the wall color.”

“Oh, that would be amazing.”

With a soft smile, Sage sidled up to Luke and wound her arms under his and around his waist. “And I bet I know someone who could even make it for you.”

When he looked down, her eyes were sparkling up at his. “Oh, yeah? Who’s that?”

However, Sage just shook her head and looked over at his mother. “If you approve of the bench, we’ll do it.”

And the look of love and acceptance on his mother’s face as she looked at them made his heart dance. “I’d love it.”

Everything was drying by the time the two of them went out hand-in-hand to the little work shed. Sage had never felt more at peace in her life. His mother loved the rooms, and she could feel that she was warming up to her as well. That was nice beyond words.

“So I’m hoping you have a plan for this bench,” Luke said, putting his hand on the back of his head.

“Well, of course. Is there paper out here? I can sketch it out for you.”

At the door, he opened it and held it. “I think so. Dad’s always got a stash of scratch paper. How are you with a carpenter’s pencil?”

They were talking with him following her as they went deeper into the near pitch blackness.

“Never used one. Are you sure this is?” The clunk that wasn’t him followed by the ouch that wasn’t him kind of answered her question. “Yow! What was that?”

He clicked on the little light. “Miter table.”

“Man, that… hurt.” She picked up her foot and did a little dance.

Trying not to laugh, he raised his eyebrows. “You okay?”

“Next time, I let you go first.” She put her foot on the ground and limped gingerly before looking up. Her gaze swept the small room. “So this is where the magic happens, huh?”

Luke lifted his eyebrows even further. “Magic? I wouldn’t call it that.” It was then that he thought about the name, her name, sitting in the corner. He glanced over at it and air lodged in his chest. It was slightly behind two other pieces, but there was no real way to cover it up or hide it, so his best bet was to keep her attention away from it. “Music. You like music, right?” He reached up to the little shelf on the other side and clicked on the radio. “Hang on. I’ll get the paper.”

His heart was slamming now with worry about leaving her there for more than seconds. “Here you go.” He came back and put it on the miter table. “Why don’t you draw it out, and I’ll see if it’s even something I can do?”

“It’s not like it’s baroque.” She took the paper and the funny, stubbed, squared off pencil with a smile and a saucy shrug. “I promise. I’ll go easy on you.”

As soon as she bent over the paper, Luke backed slowly, carefully into the corner, and tossed a rag onto the thing. Finally he could breathe.

“And then I was thinking like a little…” Realizing he wasn’t right here watching, Sage turned. “Are you not going to look at this?”

“What? Oh, yeah.” And Luke strode away from the wall back over to her, knowing his secret was safe. “Nice artwork.” He meant it too. The little bench was clearly drawn, and from the look of it, it wouldn’t be too hard to build. Only problem was if she was planning to stay here while he built it.

“Just like that,” she said, putting the pencil down. “The little lip will keep the cushions on it, and the armrests will be a nice touch to the sides.”

Right in front of him, she looked up, angling her gaze both up and behind her. “What do you think?”

“It doesn’t look too hard. What’re you planning on staining it with?” So that he could concentrate on something other than his proximity to her, Luke backed up and leaned on the scroll saw.

“I think go dark. It would contrast with the lighter cushions and stand out on that red wall.”

He nodded, thinking the plan through. “We’ll have to make a trip to Greely for the stain.”

“Cool,” she said with a bounce. “How soon can you have it done?”

Luke put his hand on the back of his head. “Tomorrow if I get some time tonight. Friday at the latest. But Friday I have to do the shopping for the meal, so if I don’t get it done by Friday, it’ll be next week.”

Sage nodded. “So bench, stain, meal.” She waved her hand in the air. “Psh. No problem.” She put her hands on her hips. “So where do we start?”

A second and Luke pushed up. “We? I didn’t know you do woodwork.”

She shrugged. “I don’t, but that doesn’t mean I can’t learn.”

Sometimes it was so strange to him that she was even the same girl who had stepped foot in this town two months before. “Okay, then. Let’s get to work.”

The craziest thing about the whole day was how incredibly much Sage enjoyed it. Doing creative things, thinking through how to do the design and making it come to life. It was more fun than anything had a right to be and even more so because she got to do it with him.

“You know,” she said as he carefully nailed the legs of the bench in place. “I think I could do a swirl on the wall on each side of it, kind of a 3-D thing with the light paint and a darker paint like the stain color. That would be fab-oo. Your mom would love it.”

Luke shook his head. “Swirly paint? Uh. Yeah. That’s your department.” He put his free hand up. “I’m not touching that one.”

She twisted her shoulders at him. “Okay, Mr. Courageous. Then leave it to me.”

“And we’re doing this bench for Kara and Priscilla’s room,” Sage babbled on as they ate supper. She hardly tasted anything as she talked, telling them all about her day and the painting and the bench. “We’re going tomorrow to Greely to get the stain.”

The pastor and his wife exchanged glances.

“Oh. If that’s okay.” Lowering her bread, Sage prayed they wouldn’t say no. They wouldn’t, would they?

“I think that would be fine,” the pastor finally said.

“Great! Eep! I’m so excited!”

The next morning Luke picked her up just after eight, and they headed to Greely.

“I got it all nailed together last night.” He glanced over at her. “I think you’re right. Mom’s going to fall in love with it.”

Sage lifted her shoulders with excitement. “You know, I was thinking.”

“Uh, oh.”

“No. This is good.” She squinted into the idea. “I want to do something nice for the Mitchells. They’ve been so great about everything.”

“What did you have in mind?”

“Well, I was noticing their end tables last night. The ones on either side of the couch. They’re really old and kind of wobbly.”

Somehow Luke got the feeling she was going to find plenty of jobs for him to do.

He glanced over at her. “So you want to fix them?”

She twisted her lips under her teeth for a second. “Actually, I was thinking about making them new ones.” Her hand went up. “That I would totally pay for. Wood, stain, all of it.”

“You don’t have to…”

“Nope. I’m not arguing here. My gift. I pay for it.” Then she dropped her hand as she melted off into some dream world he couldn’t see. “I was thinking about it last night, and I think…” With that, she launched into a ten-minute explanation of end tables with drawers and a shelf with legs that came down both sides.

Luke was having a hard time keeping up, but he knew they were going to have a blast putting the things together. “Tell you what, you draw me a picture, and I’ll see what I can do.”

She grinned up at him. “Absaposilutely.”

At the hardware store, Luke followed her around, dizzy from her excitement. It was like someone had turned on a moving generator inside her that made her bounce rather than walk.

“These would be perfect, don’t you think?” She lifted handles out of the tiny drawers for his inspection.

Luke smiled. She had very good taste and an exquisite eye for putting things together just so. “Perfect.”

Later in the little workshop, Sage took the bench to his father’s side to work on staining it while Luke cut and pieced the end tables together on the other side. She had never been happier. Amazing all these years hanging out in the mall, who knew it was the creating not the buying that would be so much fun. Dabbing and then rubbing the stain in and off, she swayed to the music he had on the little radio.

Country music. She smiled at that thought. Life made such interesting turns. Stepping back, she examined her project from every side and decided she was finished. She set the stain and rag to the side and went to find him for the instructions on the next step.

When she crossed over into the little room beyond, he was busy scroll-cutting the decorative braces they had decided to use in the corners of the end tables. Jane was going to love them. However, it was then that Sage noticed Luke hadn’t seen her enter and rather than disturb him, she simply stood and watched him, his back to her, head bent over the project. She couldn’t help it, love for him cascaded right over her, sweeping every doubt and hesitation away. Quietly she stepped up behind him and carefully ran her hands around his waist to latch in front of him.

In one instant he snapped up and hit the off switch. “Hey, woman. What do you think you’re doing?”

She laid her head on his back and pushed him into swaying with her to the music. “Not my fault. You just look too inviting.”

With that he turned, leaned on the saw and dragged her into his arms. Still swaying with him, Sage closed her eyes and let herself be held as if on the wings of an eagle soaring high above the earth. “Hmm…” She’d never felt such contentment, such overpowering tranquility. It was as if the rest of the world suddenly didn’t even exist anymore.

And he just held her, not pushing for more, no tumble into desire or passion. Their souls simply meshed and mingled, entwined as if a single spirit rather than two separate people.

“How did I ever live before I found you?” she asked.

“I ask myself that every single day, darlin’. Every. Single. Day.”

The bench was finished, shining with the lacquer like a new penny. The dark ash stain she had chosen over his protest was, of course, perfect. Luke stepped back into his father’s side of the workshop and shook his head at the vision. His mother was going to love it.

Sage had been back in the house painting her swirls for an hour. How it could take an hour to paint swirls, Luke had no idea. However, it was probably better because thinking straight with her out here with him was proving to be more of a challenge than he had bargained on.

He went out into the nearly-August sunshine and blinked it back as it assaulted his eyes. Tomorrow they would have to be shopping and Saturday was the community meal, so if they didn’t get these done today, it would be Monday before either of them had time again.

Into the house he went and on his way through the kitchen, he grabbed some water, liking how the house felt knowing she was in it. Water in hand, he went to find her in Kara’s room, but he stopped short when he came to the doorframe.

At the window, she was sitting cross-legged, her whole concentration on the wall and the final part of the swirl in front of her. Its match was already finished on the other side. Luke leaned on the doorframe and just watched her as he took a drink. He could do that forever.

Another minute and she made one final touch and then sat back.

“Very nice,” he said, pushing up from the frame and coming into the room as she jumped backward.

“Luke Baker!” she said with a squeak. “Don’t do that to me.”

“What?” He shrugged. “You did it to me.” With a smile, he lifted his chin. “Very nice. That bench is going to look awesome with this.”

She lifted both shoulders in excitement, and Luke had to admit he really liked that about her. How she could look so young and innocent and yet amazing and sophisticated. If she hadn’t fallen in love with him, he’d have never thought he could keep up. At the window next to her, he sat on his heels and admired her artwork.

“Wow. I thought you were going to do some cheap stencil thing. This is incredible.”

Her smile practically lifted her right off the floor. “You really like it?”

How could she even ask that question? He looked right at her and the smile couldn’t be stopped. “I love it. Let’s go get the bench.”

“Eek!” And with that she was off the floor. “I can’t wait to see it all done. I was thinking last night, I think Jane has a sewing machine. How hard can a couple cushions be…”

For Luke, he was just having fun watching her. Living seemed so much better the way she did it.

She was right. The bench, the swirls, the color—it made the room look classy and modern, so unlike the horrific green of its former life.

“So?” Sage asked as they stepped back from placing the bench.

“Mom may never let you leave.” Luke reached over and put his arms around Sage as they admired their handiwork. “You’re amazing, you know that?” He leaned over and put a kiss on her head.

She put her hand on his chest. “Hey, I didn’t do this alone.”

And he couldn’t help but plant a sweet kiss on her lips.

The back door banged, and they let go of each other to turn.

“That’s Mom.” Luke grabbed her hand. “Come on.”

In tandem, they went into the kitchen.

“Oh,” his mother said. “I was wondering where you two were.”

“We have a surprise for you,” Sage sing-songed, and the soft jingling of her tone made Luke love her even more.

“A surprise?”

“A big surprise.” And Sage squealed unable to quell the excitement as she bounced from foot-to-foot.

His mother lifted her eyebrows at him.

“You’re gonna love it,” he said to her unspoken question. “Come on.”

She followed them down the hall to the bedroom and stopped dead when she saw it. For a full ten seconds nothing moved. “Who…? How…?” Then she turned and looked at them. “Did you do this?”

Luke let his gaze fall to the floor as Sage put her hand on his chest again.

“Luke did,” she said, looking up at him.

He tilted his head. “Well, I had a little help.”

“It’s… oh, it’s fabulous.”

“I thought about making some cushions for it,” Sage said, following his mother who went over to the piece. “I was thinking red or maybe even white.”

And with that, they talked finishing touches so long that Sage ended up staying for supper. If she kept this up, she’d have their whole house redecorated in no time. Strangely, Luke would be okay with that.

Chapter 34

The end tables for the Mitchells would have to wait. Duty called. Luke picked her up on Friday, and they headed to the grocery store.

“So what’s Mrs. P making this week?” Sage asked.

“Ham and potatoes, green beans, salad, and rolls.”

She quirked her face. “What is this, Christmas?”

He laughed. “We’re not getting cranberry sauce.”

“Thank goodness.”

Ham for 250 people proved to be a bigger order than Sage had anticipated when he’d said it. It took them three grocery carts to get everything.

“And one more.” Luke took down another giant can of green beans and handed it to her to stack in the third cart.

“Are you sure we need this much?” she asked, looking at the pile with a skeptical shake of her head.

“When Mrs. P puts a number on the list.” He held it up for her to see. “You get that number.”

“Then Mrs. P wins.” She went around and shoved the cart with the ham forward as he navigated between the other two. “Is that everything?”

“I hope so.”

“Did they get a new refrigerator?” she asked as her thoughts turned to the next task at hand. Dragging all this stuff in was going to be no easy job; having no place to put it would be worse.

“Not new. I think Pastor Steve borrowed one from somebody for this weekend.”

At the checkout, Luke started unloading the first cart.

“Oh, Luke,” the stout lady with the black hair at the counter said. “Is it that time again already?”

“’Fraid so.” He was busy stacking cans and bags of potatoes on the conveyor belt. “How are you today?”

It was then that Sage first felt the woman’s glance hit her and snag. Over the two carts ahead of her, Sage smiled and twisted a stray piece of hair over her ear because suddenly she had a really bad case of the nerves.

“Oh. Good. Good.” Distracted, the lady continued to beep the merchandise. She fought to look at the carts and not at Sage. “Looks like Christmas.”

Luke laughed and glanced back at Sage. “That’s exactly what Sage said.”

“Oh?” the lady asked, beeping the bag of potatoes as her gaze came firmly onto Sage and stuck there.

It was clear to Sage how unwelcome she was in this conversation. Equally clear was that Luke hadn’t realized it.

“Yeah, I told her we weren’t getting cranberry sauce.” He laughed, and the lady did a short laugh as well, obviously humoring him.

One cart was now unloaded, and he started on the next one, pushing the first forward and putting the sacked groceries into it—somehow all at the same time.

“Oh, here, I’ll get these,” Sage said, coming forward to the second cart. She reached in and pulled a can out. “I sure hope somebody likes green beans more than I do.” It was supposed to be a joke, but it must not have been funny because the lady suddenly looked like she’d sucked a rotten lemon. Putting her head down, Sage took the hint and said no more as she lifted and set, lifted and set until all the cans were rolling down the conveyor.

Beep. Beep. Beep. The little tallier was the only sound between them. Luke was still gathering sacks on the other end, and although Sage would have liked to be friendly with the lady, it was very clear that would not be welcome. So she stacked and piled and worked wordlessly, praying they could get out of here with minimal damage to Luke’s reputation.

The hams were heavier than they looked, and one ca-thunked awkwardly onto the conveyor earning her an especially unhappy look from the lady. Sage quickly brushed her hair back and smiled a grimace of apology.

Ten more beeps and thankfully, shopping was finished but for the exchange of funds. Very careful not to touch him, Sage crossed behind Luke to take over his job as he paid the lady.

“Now you be careful with this set,” the lady said with only a glance at Sage, “I’d hate for you to have to spend more of your own money again.”

With one bag hovering between the checkout place and the basket, Sage stopped, intrigued and concerned. But quickly she regathered her presence of mind and finished the job.

“I’m sure we’ll be fine,” Luke said. “They got a fridge that works now.”

“Well, thank the Lord for small favors.” The lady swiped the card and handed it back. “Do you need any help getting these out to the car?”

He signed the paper as Sage fought to ask what she looked like chopped cheese? “Uh, no thanks. I think we’ve got it.”

The lady’s glance at her questioned that with an uh-huh in her eyes, but she completed the transaction and bid Luke a nice day with a God bless tacked onto the end. Without bothering to wait for a friendly good-bye Sage knew would never come her way, she turned and shoved on one cart while dragging the other behind her.

In the next heartbeat, Luke was with her wrangling the little caravan out to the car. There, they stowed the groceries in the trunk and backseat, and Luke put the baskets together and took them back in. When he came back, he looked over at her.

“Well, that was pleasant,” she said, raking the hair from her face.

“I don’t know what her problem was. She’s normally a real sweetheart.” He reached down and started the car.

But Sage knew very well what the problem was. The name started with an S and ended with age.

Thankfully there was no one around when they got to the community center and teaming up from car to refrigerator, they got the groceries put away in no time. Luke still felt bad about Mrs. Thompson. It was so strange to him how normally kind, nice people just lost their minds when Sage showed up. What was that anyway?

He tried to be goofy enough to take her mind off of it, and the fact that she was smiling by the time he dropped her off was a good sign. “So, I’ll be here around eight for supper and then the bonfire?” he asked, and she looked up at him.

The hurt was in her eyes, but she chose not to speak it. “I’ll be here.”

“So the two of you got the groceries in?” Jane asked as she sat at the kitchen table, bills spread before her.

“We did.” Sage went to the refrigerator and got water. The standoff with the clerk was doing very unhealthy things to her heart, and although she knew Jane wouldn’t be able to fix it, she needed someone to sort it out with. “Um, do you have a minute?”

At that, Jane turned. “Sure, what’s up?”

Sage ran her finger around and around the top of her glass. “Well, I know you said about how you came from like… nothing, right?”

Jane nodded as worry crossed her face.

“I’m sure that was really tough. That people judged you for it.”

“That they did.”

Nodding, Sage tried to figure out how to ask this without sounding like she was whining. “Do you think… I mean, is it possible to be judged if you have money, or is it only if you don’t?”

A moment and a light went on behind Jane’s eyes. She reached over and pushed a chair out. “Have a seat.”

Seeing no reason not to, Sage sat but kept her gaze down.

“Want to tell me what happened?”

After only a moment’s pause, Sage lifted her gaze. “People don’t like me very much. They look at me like I’m pond scum, and it doesn’t seem to matter what I do. When I was with Rory, they whispered about us, about me, and I guess I thought I kind of had that coming because… well, they thought I was fast and easy and all of that even though that wasn’t really true. But now that I’m with Luke, they still do that, they still look like they’d rather throw me off a bridge than be friendly or nice to me.”

Jane set her pencil down. “Sage, honey, people are so busy comparing themselves with you, they don’t take the time to think about what those judgments do to you.”

“Yeah, but I didn’t… I mean, I wasn’t trying to act all better than anybody. It was just us, getting groceries.” She shrugged. “And it’s bad enough that it’s me, but now they’re starting to look at Luke like that too, like why would someone like him want to be with someone like me.”

Her hostess sighed. “I know all of this has to be so hard on you, but you have to know, when they look at you like that and try to make you feel bad just for being who you are, you’re the only one who can decide if they really have that power. And the thing I’ve learned is they only have the power you choose to give them. If you choose to think of yourself however they think of you or however they happen to treat you, then you’ve built your life on sand. People’s opinions and approval are not something to build your worth on because even if they love you, they’re going to let you down, they’re going to get upset with you, and sooner or later, that house is going to crumble.

“That’s why you’ve got to learn to build on the Rock, on God Himself Who loves you more than you will ever know.” She turned all the way to Sage. “I remember something Steve told me a long time ago, ‘Only two people get a vote about your worth and acceptance, you and God, and your vote doesn’t count.’”

That brought out a half smile from Sage who remembered her hostess saying that once before. “But how do you do that? How do you remember that when they’re making you feel like you are worthless.”

“You go to God. And you get really good at going to Him long before they ever start those judgments. Remember the tea cup?”

Sage smiled and nodded. How could she forget?

“Well, sometimes other people don’t see the worth of that tea cup the same way God does. That doesn’t take away its worth to God. It only means they are looking at it from a worldly perspective, not a Godly one. And I’ll be honest, I’ve learned to say what Jesus said on the cross, ‘Father, forgive them. They don’t know what they’re doing.’” Jane shook her head. “They really don’t, Sage. They don’t grasp even for a moment how eternally important it is to be encouraging and bring people up rather than tearing them down.

“One of my favorite Scriptures says that God sent me here on a mission to put people together, not to take them apart. That’s what I try to do, as much as I can.”

Gratefulness touched Sage’s heart. “Well, you’re good at it.”

Jane nodded. “And so are you. I’ve seen how much Luke has grown over the summer. He’s always been a great guy, but now… there’s a confidence there that wasn’t there before.” She stopped and seemed to listen to the air. “Sometimes I get things on a different level than most people. I can see things that others just don’t, and I think that Satan is terribly afraid of you.”

“Of me?” Sage backed up. “What does that mean? Why would he be afraid of me?”

“Because He knows what a difference you could make in this world if he ever let you out of his grasp. That’s why he’s done so much to keep you down. You have a gift of beauty and of strength, Sage, and if you ever harnessed those gifts, you could change the world.”

Sage still wasn’t sure about that even as she dressed later for supper and the bonfire, but one part of Jane’s words resonated with her. “Father,” she spoke the words softly as she gazed into her mirror, “forgive them, they really don’t know what they’re doing.”

For the first time, she let the hurt find her heart, and she let herself feel what they were doing to her. Putting her down, shunning her, condemning her for decisions she had no part in making. Yes, the townspeople but that included her family as well. Jaycee.

Wow, did that thought hurt, cutting deeply into her spirit. Words, tones, looks. They all came back at Sage like knives intent on slicing her to ribbons. “Father,” she prayed, reaching out as though she was drowning, “forgive Jaycee. She doesn’t know. She doesn’t. She doesn’t know what this is like to not have a real family, to feel like such a freak and an outcast. But God, I know, she’s hurting too. She’s angry at me. I get that, but I don’t know how to fix it.”

Her thoughts were spiraling now. “And Dad, God, please show me how to be his daughter or to not be if he doesn’t want me. Help me to forgive him and be okay with whatever he decides.”

And then her spirit snagged on another face. “Emily.” It took breathing to get the tears not to overwhelm her. “God, please help…”

The conversation over supper centered around the meal the next morning, peeling or not peeling potatoes, and what to do about the refrigerator. For her part, Sage mostly listened, glad the adults and Luke were so comfortable together. When they went out to the car, however, it took nearly no time at all for Luke to look at her. In fact, he hadn’t even started the car yet.

“Okay. What’s up?”

Sage had hoped he wouldn’t notice. She should have known better. “I’m sorry about today, at the grocery store.”

He lowered his gaze and lifted his eyebrows. “You’re sorry? What do you have to be sorry about?”

Her gaze stayed on her fingers. “I just know what everyone thinks about me, and I didn’t want that to rub off on you.”

To her surprise, he laughed. “You’re seriously worried what they think about me?”

Anger bumped into her. “Yes. Why is that strange?”

He laughed again and started the car. “Darlin’, if I cared about what they thought, I’d already be someone else entirely.”

“What does that mean?”

“‘Luke, why don’t you play football?’ ‘Luke, you are a good height. Why don’t you join the basketball team? They could sure use you.’ ‘Luke, why aren’t you doing the stock shows this year?’ ‘Luke, we need more people in the band, and you’re not doing anything…’” He swung his gaze over to her. “You really have to ask?”

“But…”

“No, Sage.” He reached over and took her hand. “I love you, but if you change who you are for them, you won’t even recognize yourself by the time you’re done. You’ve got to figure out where you’re standing and be there. If they love you, they will understand. If they don’t, that’s their problem, not yours.” Once again, he glanced at her. “I’ve had so much fun with you this week, doing the furniture and painting. You’re so much happier when you let yourself be you.”

It was pointless to deny. “But they hate me for being me.”

“No. They hate who they think you are, but that you isn’t even really you. It’s who you think you’re supposed to be, or who they want you to be. Be you. Let that be good enough.”

She’d never heard a more daunting challenge.

Shadows and figures were dancing in the firelight by the time they arrived, and Luke was glad for the anonymity. He didn’t need to be seen by everyone to be happy about being there with her. In her soft pink top that floated in layers, she looked like casual perfection. He loved that about her, how simply stylish she was no matter what she decided to wear.

Walking up to the fire, she matched his steps, his arm around her, hers around his waist as together as they had ever before been, and he loved that most of anything.

“Well, if it isn’t Luke and Sage,” Jessica said, and she smiled at them.

“Hey, Jess.” Luke stopped their forward progress but never removed his arm. “How’re you?”

“Ugh. So not ready for school to start. You?”

Luke laughed. “When have I ever been ready for school to start?”

Jessica joined in his laugh. “Have you finished the reading?”

“Uh… sure,” he said with a grin. Then his gaze slipped down to Sage. “Sage, do you know Jess?”

“Oh. I don’t think so.” Sage offered her hand.

“I’ve seen you around,” Jessica said, and the words held nothing but kindness. “I love that top. Where’d you get it?”

And remarkably, as he watched her, Sage opened like a rose after a rain. She and Jessica talked about clothes and classes, and Luke was amazed at how easy it all seemed. He loved watching her like this. Not fighting. Not struggling. Just being… her. It was all he’d ever hoped for and more.

Sage was actually beginning to feel like part of the group. She and Jessica had talked so much Luke had excused himself to get them something to drink. By the time he got back, Jessica and Ashlyn were sharing embarrassing Luke-from-kindergarten stories, and he wished he hadn’t left.

“Remember when the boys all dressed up with our dresses?” Jessica said.

Ashlyn laughed. “My mom still has that picture. Luke has this cute blond wig on. You should see it.”

“I’ll have to sometime,” Sage said, looking up at him, loving the pink tint of his ears.

“Don’t listen to them.” He ducked behind his Coke and took a drink. “It wasn’t as funny as they’re making it out to be.”

“The best part was the dress,” Jessica said, and they dissolved into gales of laughter. “That thing was awful. It was orange, and then he had these pearls on.”

“Okay. Okay,” Luke said. “I think Sage has heard enough.”

“No.” She batted his hand away and turned for her new friends. “Single strand or double?”

“Those long ones,” Ashlyn said. “You know the ones you loop and loop around your neck. He was so cute!”

Their laugher joined with the happiness of those around the campfire, and Sage smiled. It was nice to finally be a part of the party.

“Oh, great.” Luke ducked behind his Coke an hour later and tipped his head to Sage.

“What?” she asked, concerned but wholly unsure why.

He lifted his eyes and nodded to the other side of the fire, and with one glance, she completely understood. The red pickup had joined the others on the edge of the ditch, and up the road came none other than Rory Harris and Jaycee Lawrence. His arm was around her shoulders, and with one look, Sage knew the show was about to start. From each side of them, they greeted their worshippers.

“Ugh. Did I look that nauseating?” Sage asked him, tipping her own head. Their friends had drifted off, so it wasn’t like they needed to hide their conversation, but they did so anyway. “He is a disgusting human being.”

Luke appraised her. “That’s exactly what I’ve been saying my whole entire life.”

She smiled up at him. “Well, clearly you have good taste.”

Turning to her, he set the can on the ground, put his back to the others and lifted his chin. “What do you say we just have fun tonight together? Forget them.” He took her drink and set it with his. Then gently he put his hands at her waist and push-started the two of them dancing under the moonlight.

“You know.” She put her wrists up and around his neck, “I think that’s a great idea.”

He laid his head against hers. “I thought so, too.”

However, it wasn’t long and the noise of the others cracked through their bubble of happiness and peace, and Luke reluctantly picked his head up to glance over to the other side of the fire. Sure enough, Rory and Jaycee were right there, framed by the crowd. It wasn’t so much the sight of them as the look on Jaycee’s face that stopped his body cold. She looked… frightened.

When he stopped swaying, Sage did too, and she looked up at him in confusion. Then her gaze traced with his across the fire to the scene now dancing in the flickering light beyond. Jaycee stood there, Rory’s arm nearly encircling her neck. He said something and the knot of people around them laughed. The look of trying to think it was funny as she tried not to cry crossed Jaycee’s face, and Luke knew she wasn’t at all comfortable with this little sideshow.

He was completely unprepared, however, for Sage coming right out of his arms and starting that direction. “Sage!” Luke barely snagged her trajectory. “What are you doing?”

Fury bled through her as Sage spun to face Luke. “Look, I don’t care what she’s done, Jaycee is my sister, and I’m not about to let him treat her like that.”

Panic flooded Luke, and he tilted his head, trying to get her to be reasonable. “Sage…”

However, she didn’t even let him get it out. “No. Luke. No. Jaycee is my sister, and whether she likes it or not, she’s in my pasture.”

His eyebrows hiked. “Your pasture? What does that mean?”

Just then another whoop went up from the crowd, and when Sage turned, no protests Luke could come up with would’ve stopped her. “Now let go!” She shook out of his hold and let the anger infuse every molecule of her being deeper and deeper with every step she took. On the other side of the fire, right in front of them, she stopped and planted her hands on her hips. “Let her go, Rory.”

“Sage,” Jaycee said plaintively pleading for her not to get involved.

But Sage simply raised her eyebrows as if in warning. “I said, ‘Let my sister GO!’”

“Oh, yeah? And what’re you going to do about it?” Rory asked, his face contorting into an evil, sadistic laugh.

“You wanna know?” With a nod, she took a step toward him, and every single person there took a full step back. “You see this?” From her pocket she pulled out her cell phone and held it up.

“Your phone? What’re you going to do, call Mommy and Daddy?” he retorted. “Oh, I’m so scared.”

She took another step toward him, and everyone else had now backed so far away he didn’t even have to worry about tripping on anyone when he backed up.

“Sage,” Jaycee said again, her eyes worried, her face full of fear. “This…”

“Nine,” Sage said, her gaze only on his as she pressed the button. “Let her go, Rory.”

“Nine?” he asked with a laugh.

“One.” She narrowed her eyes so that he knew she meant business. “Harassment? Assault? Drinking and driving? Underage drinking? Wonder where they’ll start with the charges.”

Understanding and horror met right in the middle of his face, and he blanched. “The cops?”

A gasp went across the crowd.

Resolve drained through her as she dared him to keep playing chicken. “What’s it gonna be, Loverboy? Let her go, or I will press one.”

The next second expanded to an eternity, and then Rory spitefully yanked his arm from her and pushed Jaycee from his side. With one hand still on the phone, Sage took hold of Jaycee and pulled her behind her toward Luke. “Good choice.” However, she never dropped the gravity of her gaze. “Don’t you ever come near her again, or I will bury you, and that’s a promise.” With that, she spun on her heel. “Come on. Let’s go home.”

With Jaycee under the protection of his arm, they went in tandem through the crowd to his car. Luke’s mind was spinning with disparate pieces of what had just happened. He’d never seen Sage like that, and he was 100 percent convinced she would’ve hit one as easily as not.

“Here, Jayc,” Sage said when they got to his car. “You get in front. I’ll get in back.”

“Sage?” Jaycee asked, clearly shell-shocked.

“No. It’s okay.” At the car when Luke let go of Jaycee, Sage enfolded her in her arms for one second before pulling the seat forward and getting in. “I’m fine back here.”

Luke had so many words jumbling in his head, he had no idea where to start with them all. So he chose to simply get in next to Jaycee and drive to their parents’ house. However, when they got there, he had no idea what to do next. “Uh, …?”

“I can…” Jaycee started.

“Luke, why don’t you go in with her?” Sage asked quickly from the back. “Make sure she gets in okay and that somebody knows she’s okay.”

He had no idea how to accomplish all of that, but he nodded just the same, got out and opened Jaycee’s door.

“Are you… are you coming?” Jaycee asked Sage when she got out, but Sage just got out, smiled softly and shook her head.

“You go on. They don’t want to see me.”

And then, as if moving in a dream, Jaycee stepped forward and put her arms around her sister. “Thank you.”

Sage smiled and patted her sister’s back. “Any time.”

“Jaycee?” her mother said when they entered the kitchen. Then her face fell even further. “And Luke? You’re home early.” There were more questions she didn’t voice.

“There was some trouble at the party.” Luke took her right in and then looked down at her. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

“Trouble? What kind of trouble? Jaycee, what happened? Are you okay?” Her mother was right there, checking every inch of her daughter.

“I’m fine, Mom.” She turned to Luke, her arms crossed, and it took her effort to get her gaze up to his. “Thank you.”

He said nothing, just mashed his lips together and nodded. “I’d better get back.”

She half-smiled and nodded. With that he started out but had only made it to the door.

“You need help tomorrow?” Jaycee called, and she sniffed.

Luke turned, took one look at her, standing there in the protective arms of her mother. “Sure. I always need help.”

Jaycee didn’t say more, but her eyes spoke of gratefulness and guilt. “K. I’ll be there.”

With that, Luke headed back out. He strode down the sidewalk to the car and in one motion he was inside. His emotions were zinging in so many directions, he could hardly decipher all of them.

“Is Jaycee okay?” Sage, who was now in the passenger seat, asked, and her concern was clearly no act.

“Yeah. She’s okay.” He reached down and started the car before looking over at her. “You’re something else, you know that?”

For the first time since she’d headed into battle at the bonfire, she looked slightly less than unstoppable. “So I’ve heard.”

He drank her in even as he headed back out to the road. “That took guts.”

“Or stupidity. I’m not sure which.”

“Were you really going to call the cops?”

She let out a long sigh. “If he hadn’t let her go, yeah. I would have.”

“I thought so.” Luke nodded slowly. “Remind me never to cross you.”

Her smile held a challenge. “I think you’re safe.”

He was glad of that.

At the preacher’s house, Sage said goodnight to him with an “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Bright and early to peel potatoes.” He pointed at her as he got back to his car. “And don’t be late.”

“How late can I be? It’s right across the parking lot.” She laughed, having never looked forward to manual labor so much in her life.

All night Luke had prayed for both of them. He couldn’t shake the look in Jaycee’s eyes when he had left their kitchen. She had been far more shaken than he had at first believed. Somehow Sage knew that and despite everything that said she should just mind her own business, she had gone charging in like the only armed knight in a jousting match. “Dear Lord, we both know the deck is stacked against Sage here, and as mad as I am at Jayce, she doesn’t deserve to be treated like Rory was treating her. Please help her to see that, and help both of them to just know You love them. Amen.”

“Father,” Sage said, far more solidly as she applied a light layer of make-up the next morning at her mirror, “forgive them. They don’t know what they do. Forgive and help Jaycee see that this is not a competition. I don’t want to beat her. I just want to get to know her, to see if I can be a sister. Be with Ryder.” His name always brought a smile to her face. “Protect him from all of this stuff. And for Dad and Em, just for peace, God. For peace for both of them.”

“Okay, troops,” Mrs. P said as they stood in the kitchen. “I need potato peelers.” She eyed Sage on one side and Jaycee on the other. “Mrs. Mitchell, will you help Sage?”

“I’d be happy to.”

Sage breathed a huge sigh of relief. She had spent her ten minutes since arriving diligently avoiding her stepsister.

“Luke, you and the pastor can cut up this here ham, and Jaycee, you can open the green beans and get them in the pots.”

“We’re on it,” Luke said, and with that, they all went to their own stations.

The potato peelers turned out to be small shiny instruments that Sage was smart enough to watch Jane use first. Knowing she was going to be hopelessly bad at this, she picked up a potato and ran the silver thing over it. It wasn’t nearly as easy as it looked. Down the potato. Down the potato. Down the…

Mrs. Mitchell already had three of them done.

“What’re we supposed to do with the bones?” the pastor asked, holding up a large bone, pink still clinging to it.

“Oh, we’re gonna save those,” Mrs. P said. “They make excellent soup bones. That’s what my family survived on when I was little. That and rock soup.”

“Rock soup?” Luke asked. “That sounds awful.”

Mrs. P let out a raucous laugh. “That it was, my boy. That it was. My mama would put a few vegetables in a pot and then go out and get the biggest rock she could find, wash it off, and put it right there in the pot with them vegetables and cook it. When it was done, she took out the rock and fed all of us kids. It wasn’t much more than glorified water, but Mama swore the rock gave it minerals and stuff we needed. Yep, I sure enough ate my share of rock soup growing up.”

Sage was torn between fighting to peel and trying to imagine eating rock soup. Somehow she had never considered that people would do such a thing to feed their children.

“Is that why you help out here?” Jaycee asked, dumping another can of green beans into a pot.

Mrs. P smiled a tight, sad smile. “Well, I guess I’m a little like St. Paul. I know what it’s like to have a little and I know what it’s like to have a lot. The Lord’s taught me good lessons in both places.”

“Like what?” Luke asked, and Sage leaned back so as not to miss a word.

“Well, that folks is folks no matter where you go, what you have or don’t. Some folks is nice. Some folks would rather tear you down than offer a hand to help you up. But the key ain’t never them. It’s you. If you can be at peace with the nice ones and with the nasty ones, if you can keep your eyes on Him instead of on who’s doing what to who.” She stopped chopping and pointed upward with her knife. “Then it really don’t matter what the people you’re around are like, you can weather it.”

The kitchen grew quiet as if God Himself had just entered their midst.

“God ain’t a God of circumstance. Isn’t that right, Pastor? He’s a God of personal, getting right down there in the rock soup with you if you let Him. He wants to because He knows you be a different person when you let Him in. You be kinder and gentler, and you stop listening to all those people trying to make you sit down and shut up about Him and what He’s done for you. For me, I’ve seen what God can do. I’ve seen my mama a-readin’ her Bible even when she didn’t know what them words meant. She read it because she believed God was a-talkin’ to her when she did. And He got us through some mighty big scrapes when I was growing up too.

“So, doin’ this, feedin’ other people because of all the good God’s done in my life, it ain’t charity. It’s gratitude. I’m grateful for what God’s done in my life, and I want to pass that good on. I love them because God loved me first. What’d you say that time about overflow?” she asked the pastor.

“We give from the overflow of what God’s doing in our lives,” the pastor said, slowly cutting the slices of ham.

“That’s right.” She pointed the knife at him. “You give out of the overflow, and what I’ve found is when I let Him pour some blessings on me—like being here with you all—then I’ve got more than enough to give out to other folks. It ain’t hard. It’s just doing for others what God’s already done for me.” Stopping, she shook her head. “Ah, now listen to me, a-goin’ on. What’s an old woman like me even talking about such things like I know what life’s all about?”

Jane scoffed. “You’re not old, Mrs. P.”

“No.”

“Not at all.”

“Of course not.”

Sniffing back the emotion in her eyes, Sage smiled. “You’re not old, Mrs. P. You’re vintage.”

The smile that came to the woman’s face lit up the whole room. “Vintage?” She let out a whoop of laughter. “Now, I like that, Miss Sage.” Squaring her shoulders, she threw them backward. “I’m gonna have to tell Mr. P that one. We ain’t old, Mr. P. We’re vintage.” And she let out another laugh, one that made Sage’s heart soar for the happiness in it.

For some reason, Sage’s heart glued to Mrs. P’s happiness and stuck there the rest of the day. One word, that’s all it took to put a smile on her face and a joy in her spirit that never dimmed. One word. And Sage remembered all Mrs. P had said as well. Could it be that she was the key? Could it be that no matter what the others were doing, it was her that determined what happened in the situation? Could keeping her eyes on God and what He had given her give her the space to let go of what the others did to her? Forgive them, Lord. For they don’t know what they do. And show me how to let the love and blessings You’ve given me be used to love others. Help me do that.

With the potatoes peeled, she worked with Luke to get them all into the pots before helping to set up the line. Focus on Him. God’s blessings. All He had given her. As Sage looked around, she couldn’t help but count them. The pastor and Jane, Luke, Mrs. P. Even Jaycee who didn’t seem to have the edge of ice on her today. Yes, Sage was grateful for them all.

And so when the people started showing up at noon, and the pastor thanked God for the bounty of His love, they weren’t just words anymore. She felt them digging down into her spirit, into her being, so much so that when she lifted her head, she felt different.

“Good afternoon,” she said to the first man in line as she gave him the ham with a sincere smile. “It sure is a nice day, isn’t it?”

“That it is, Missus. That it is.”

“Well, hi there,” she said to the next one, putting the ham onto his plate. “We’re so glad you came to join us today.”

“Thank you so much, Ma’am. Thank you.”

It was all Sage could do to hold back the tears. They were thanking her. She hadn’t cooked all of this. She was just handing it out, and yet she was getting the thanks.

“You need any help?” Luke asked, appearing at her shoulder, his hands on his beltline as he surveyed the line.

The smile she beamed up at him could’ve been no brighter. “I think I’ve got this.” Then she turned to the woman who came up next. “Ham?”

“Why, yes. Thank you.”

Thank you. Why had she never heard those words quite the same way before?

She should have been bone tired by the time 2 o’clock rolled around, and yet it was like she had found a whole reservoir of energy. “Last of the green beans coming through.” Sage set the pot on the stove and stepped back. “What do you want me to do with these, Mrs. P?”

The woman came over and examined the leftovers. “Why don’t you scoop them out and put them in these bags, Miss Sage? That way we can take them home and use them in the ham bone soup.”

Lifting her eyebrow, Sage smiled with a challenge. “No rock soup tonight?”

Mrs. P let out a hearty laugh. “Not tonight, baby doll. Not tonight!”

Luke couldn’t help but be amazed at how happy Sage seemed. No longer was she hiding out, trying to get out of the tough assignments. No, she was right in the middle of everything. As he worked on the dishes, his only wish was that she would come over and help him, not because he needed the help but because he so wanted to be near her.

“What’s next?” she asked Mrs. P when the four bags of green beans were stacked neatly on the counter.

“Well, Luke could use some help.”

He shook his head at her wording, knowing that wasn’t going to go un-commented upon.

Sage rolled her sweet eyes. “Tell me about it. Luke could always use some help.”

Mrs. P laughed. “Truer words were never spoken, child.”

With a laugh of her own, Sage crossed the kitchen to his side where she leaned on the sink on her elbows. “Mrs. P and I agree, you need help.”

Looking down at her, he corkscrewed his face. “Oh, yeah?”

“Yep, and Mrs. P knows everything about everything.”

Like he was going to argue with that. “Well, you know where the dish towels are. Get to work, woman.”

She flounced over to the drawer and lifted her shoulder. “Since you asked so nicely.”

When they walked out at a quarter-to-four, Luke took her hand to walk with her over to the pastor’s house. Jaycee had already left, and Sage felt badly about that. It was like her sister didn’t know how to be around them. Not that Sage blamed her for that. She didn’t know how to be around her sister either. But at least no spaghetti sauce had been spilled. Maybe the best it would ever be with them was just staying out of each other’s way, but even that was better than things had been before.

“So, ham soup with green beans,” Luke said as they walked, letting their hands swing in the sunshine between them.

“Mmmm.” Sage lifted her eyebrows. “Not sure I want more ham after today, but it sounds a lot better than rock soup.”

“No kidding.” He took three more steps. “You know, sometimes I get down about life, sometimes I think it’s being really unfair about things, but then I hear that, and I think, ‘What do I have to complain about?’”

“I know.” Her spirit dropped deeper into the thoughts she’d been thinking all day. “Mrs. P is awesome. She’s so happy all the time, and then to find out she survived that. It makes me think about all I’ve got and how I’ve wasted it, complaining and whining because I didn’t have more.”

At the pastor’s house, they sat down on the outside steps, neither ready to go inside just yet.

“Jaycee was sure quiet today,” Luke said, putting his hand behind her on the step rather than around her.

“I know. I hope she doesn’t hate me for last night.”

“Hate you?” His gaze jumped over to her. “I don’t think that’s why she was quiet.”

“Oh, yeah? Why?”

He thought about it a minute. “Well, I know Jaycee, and she’s pretty independent. I think she’s grateful, but she doesn’t know how to be. It’s like she doesn’t know what to say, so she doesn’t say anything at all.”

Sage considered that. “Isn’t it weird how much we misjudge each other? I mean, like Jaycee. I thought she was the meanest person on earth for the longest time. Now, I think she’s just hurting and I feel bad for her.”

Leaning forward, he put his hands together as his elbows rested on his knees. “Can I ask you a question?”

“Sure?”

“Last night, you said Jaycee was in your pasture. What’d you mean by that?”

Her laugh was soft. “Just what Pastor Steve was saying about the sheep God’s put in our pasture for us to be responsible for. I’m starting to realize that my life isn’t just about me.” She copied him, putting her elbows on her knees. “It’s like Mrs. P said today, ‘You’re the key. Not them.’ I was always so worried about what everyone else thought about me, I never really bothered to think that I could maybe make a difference to them in their lives.”

“My mom loves the room. She’s been telling everyone who will listen about it.”

That touched Sage’s heart. “It was fun, doing that for her. Like the end tables for the Mitchells. I think they’re going to love them. Which reminds me are we working on them tomorrow?”

“Oh. No can do. Mom’s got Alyssa for the weekend, and we’re all going over to Grandma’s. In fact, she told me this morning to make sure you were coming.”

Sage twisted her face. “She did not.”

“Did too.” He quirked his gaze at her. “I think she’s falling in love with you. Not that I blame her or anything. You’re pretty irresistible when you want to be.” Leaning over, he planted a quick kiss on her cheek that made Sage blush all the way down to her toes. “So, what do you say? Ham soup tonight, Grandma’s chicken tomorrow?”

“Sounds heavenly.”

Chapter 35

Ham soup had actually been quite good, and together with the Mitchells they had eaten and then watched a movie Sage fell asleep halfway through. It wasn’t that the movie was bad, but lying on the floor with Luke’s arm as a pillow, she just couldn’t help it.

The next morning she dressed in her white palazzo pants and simple white top. She added a gold belt to the middle that hung down slightly. It was a nice touch. Light make-up. Hair in casual waves. Even Sage couldn’t be disappointed in the final outcome.

Luke was seriously going to have to get some nitroglycerin because if she kept showing up like that, he was bound to have a heart attack. While dressed to the nines she was stunning. Casual sent her right off the charts. He smiled at her, hoping she remembered his name as he came out of the church before the service to find her and Mrs. Mitchell over by the fireplace.

Her grin back at him told him that illogically, she remembered him very well. Striding over to them, he checked his heart once more as he bent and kissed her cheek. “Morning.”

“Morning to you too,” Sage said, putting her hand on his chest and not taking the other from around his waist when he tried to step back.

“Good morning, Luke,” Mrs. Mitchell said, and her smile was knowing and demure.

“Morning,” he said with a nod. Then he looked down at Sage, and she was more beautiful up close than she was from a distance. His heart sped up, and he had to take a breath to keep it in his chest. “You’re waiting after church, right?”

“Absolutely,” Sage said just as Mrs. P and her husband stepped up.

“Well, laws a mercy, child, don’t you look just heavenly. An angel sent right down here into our very midst.” Mrs. P enveloped Sage in a hug she even had to let Luke go to accept. When she stepped back, Mrs. P smiled as if someone had just flipped a light on inside of her. “This is Miss Sage, Clarence. The one I’ve been telling you about.”

“Why, Miss Sage. It is a pleasure.” The slight man with the graying hair took her hand and bowed. “My Patty Ann hasn’t stopped talking about you the whole night.”

Sage smiled but ducked in embarrassment over the compliment. “Hope it was all good.”

“All good. All very good,” he said, and for one second, Luke thought she might start crying right there.

“Well, I think she’s pretty special too.” Sage’s gaze went over to Mrs. P who suddenly looked like she might start crying too.

Quickly Luke ducked. “I’d better get back inside.”

However, before he got away, Sage snagged his hand. “Wait for me after.”

“I will.”

Sage was still flying on the look in his eye when her gaze flitted to the opening of the outside church doors. The sunlight streamed in, preceding the entrance of her father, Jaycee, her brother, and her stepmom. This was the hardest moment. As much as she wanted life to be wonderful, their entrance always had a way of reminding her that it wasn’t.

Next to her, Jane surveyed her. “Are you all right?”

Glancing her direction, Sage smiled. “I just wish they wanted me around.” It was difficult to keep the tears in her heart from finding her lashes.

“Well, they don’t know what they’re missing.”

Part of her wished she believed that, but the other part watched them circle the other direction, staying as far away from the fireplace and her as they could get. Father, the mantra began as it did every time she thought of them now, forgive them. They don’t know what they’re doing.

Then, like a surprise raindrop from a cloudless sky, Jaycee’s gaze chanced across and met hers, and the softest, tiniest smile traced across her sister’s face and through her eyes. For a second, Sage didn’t know what to do. After a moment she let her heart make the decision as she let a soft smile go onto her own face. It wasn’t a huge breakthrough. In fact, in the next second it was like nothing had even changed, but Sage remembered and knew it was a step. One step. And that was far better than nothing.

As Sage sat in the front by Jane, she watched as Pastor Steve laid the book he had just read from aside and faced the congregation. “For in this hope we were saved. But hope that is seen is no hope at all. Who hopes for what they already have? But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently.

“In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans. And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for God’s people in accordance with the will of God.

“The words of St. Paul that Sister Phillis read so eloquently,” Pastor Steve said. “We hope for what we do not see, what we cannot see. Who hopes for something they already have, right? St. Paul, the man of wisdom, tells us that hope must be ours especially when we cannot see how something will work out. And he goes on to tell us how to have hope. It’s not about knowing what we can do to fix things. It is about having hope in our weakness, in our frailty, in the midst of our human suffering and trials. Hope is not about when things are going well. Hope is about when we’re stuck in yuck, and there doesn’t seem to be a way out of it.

“Hope is what says, ‘God has a way even when there seems to be no way.’ In fact, the Scriptures today tell us that even when we don’t know what to pray for, the Holy Spirit will step in and pray for what we most need. This is being in the middle of God’s grace. Seeing our circumstance and knowing we don’t know how to fix it but knowing that even if we don’t, He does.”

Sage smiled, wondering if he had written these words for her. If so, she was thankful.

“I want you to understand that just as we cannot be faithful enough in our own faith. We also cannot be hopeful enough in our own hope. There will come a time and a place where we’re going to want to give up because we don’t see how this is ever going to get any better. That’s when we have to stop relying on our own hope and start grabbing onto His hope. God’s hope, just like His grace and His mercy, does not end. He never gives up on us. Ever. He doesn’t say, ‘Well, okay, I’ve wasted enough time on him or on her. I give up.’ God never gives up. He is constantly working to set things right in our lives, in your life, in a very up-close-and-personal way. Why?

“Because He made you with a purpose. He set you where you are, as you are so that the world can see Him working in your life. So when things go wrong and we make bad choices or wind up on the downside of the up ladder, remember that God is not finished with you. If you will let Him, He can take even this and show you Him and by doing so, He will show the world Himself as well. With this in mind, we strive forward, forgetting what has gone before, reaching for that prize of faith, which is Jesus Christ Himself standing before us ready to welcome us home—not some day in Heaven. Right now. If we will let Him. He hopes for us as He never gives up. Let our hope begin to be found in Him as we reach up and let Him take hold of our lives in a powerful, real way today. So that His life, His love, His faith, His mercy, and His hope will be channeled through our lives into a world that needs Him so desperately. Amen.”

Closing her eyes, Sage breathed a sigh of peace. God had a plan, and if He hadn’t given up on them, then she wasn’t going to either. “Amen.”

In her nightly reading, Sage had stumbled upon the Scripture passage be good to those who hate you, and the first time she read it, she thought of the lady at the grocery store. Black hair, stout, with a disapproving look that would shatter glass, the woman made Sage’s skin crawl with the revulsion pouring from her. So when she stepped from the church into the lobby, it was a shock to find just that woman staring up at her from the midst of the crowd who had just exited the church.

And she didn’t look appreciably happier today either. Her eyes narrowed as if to say, You are not welcome here.

With a breath and a lift of her chin, Sage put a smile on her face as she descended the steps. God loved her, chips and all. That was all that mattered. As she started across the lobby to the fireplace, her gaze locked with the woman’s once again and this time, there was an imperceptible earthquake in her heart. Be good to those who hate you. Be good?

Be. Good.

So simple. Yet so incredibly difficult.

Only that thought propelled her right over to where the lady stood, and with a smile, Sage put out her hand. “Hi, I’m Sage. I believe we met the other day at the grocery.”

The look of horror and confusion that drained right onto the woman’s face could have been no more panicked.

“But I don’t think I got your name,” Sage continued as if meeting the queen.

The woman’s eyes widened to saucer-size. “Oh. Uh. It’s Amelia. Amelia Thompson.”

“Well, Amelia Thompson, it’s very nice to meet you.”

“You… too?” There was a lift to the last syllable as if Amelia Thompson had no idea what had just happened.

“Oh, look,” Sage said, and she laid her hand on Amelia’s. “It’s my little brother. Would you excuse me?” She stepped away and heedless of the looks of all of those around her, she let the smile of happiness come to her whole spirit. “Ryder!”

He took one look and nearly knocked three people down to get to her. She knelt on one knee and collected him to her. He smelled like pine trees and little boy. “Sage!”

“Oh, I have missed you.” She bent her head into him and then pulled back to look at him. “What have you been up to? Are you behaving yourself?”

“I learned the backstroke this week.”

“You did? I don’t even know the backstroke.”

“You’ll have to come see me sometime. You have to. You have to.”

Sage laughed. “You’re right. I’ll have to.”

When she stood, her gaze chanced to where her father stood, talking to others but looking right at them, at her. Feeling the risk, she gave him a small smile and then let her gaze fall. Yes, she wanted to have the courage to go over there and talk to him, but it was not yet in her possession.

“Are you coming home?” Ryder asked at her side, and Sage looked down at him, sad that she would have to break his heart yet again.

“Not yet, but maybe some time.”

He put his head down and nodded. “I miss you.”

“Oh, sweetheart. I miss you too.” She bent again and hugged him. “Hey,” she said, and his gaze came up hers. “I’ve been praying for you. Have you been praying for me?”

She could tell the answer by his eyes.

“Tell you what,” she said quickly. “I’ll pray for you. You pray for me and then maybe we won’t miss each other so much. Deal?”

A smile jumped back to his face. “Deal.”

They shared a high-five, and Sage felt the bond between them strengthen.

“Gotta go,” Ryder said, and he headed for the door with his family. Sage turned and watched him join them. For right now, this is where God had her, and she would be okay with that. She looked up into the glowing face of her Savior in the artwork on the wall. “You’re my Hope, Jesus. I don’t know how to make this right, but I know You do. Please help me.”

“Sage?” Luke said, suddenly standing right next to her, and she turned. “You ready?”

Her smile was soft and sad. “Yeah.”

“My hero!” Hannah said from the couch, getting up to come hug Sage.

Accepting the hug with a question and a confused pat, Sage looked at Luke who just grinned at her. “What did I do?”

“What did you do? Are you kidding me?” Hannah pulled back and put her hands on Sage’s arms. “You obliterated the pink! The only bad thing is I don’t get to sleep in there more often. That room is gorgeous.”

The compliments hit her, and Sage giggled just a bit in embarrassment. “Oh, thanks.”

“Luke!” their mother called from the kitchen.

“Yo!” He went that direction and came back with Alyssa’s hand tucked firmly in his. The little jacket was set off with a frilly pink skirt and the butterfly in her hair. “And look who we have here.”

“Oooh, Alyssa. Look at you.” Hannah held her hands out. “Come on over here, and let’s have some girl talk.”

Alyssa let go of Luke and bounced up between them.

“Look at this jacket you are sporting,” Hannah said. “My. My. My. Aren’t we stylin’ today.”

The little girl beamed her a smile.

“And the shoes,” Sage squealed. “Ugh. Where do you shop? I have to get me some of these.”

From above them, Luke laughed. “I think I’ll go help them cook.” And with that he started out.

“Chicken!” Sage called after him.

“You got that right.” And he disappeared as she laughed and went back to her girls’ moment with Alyssa and Hannah.

After the lunch dishes were finished, Luke suggested they go out to the backyard and let his mother take a little rest. Alyssa was as sweet as she could be, but she was not one to want to play alone. No. She wanted someone right there, and Uncle Luke was as good a choice as any.

“So your mom is keeping Alyssa?” Sage asked as they went over to the swing.

Alyssa got on, and Luke pushed her gently. For her part, Sage just sat down on the little bench and watched them.

“Higher!” Alyssa called. “Higher!”

Luke obliged, pushing just a bit harder. “Friday was Kara and Chris’s fifth anniversary. They went to some bed and breakfast on the coast. Mom offered to keep Alyssa, and here we are.”

“Wheee!” The little girl’s smile was enough to make anybody’s day.

“You’re good with her,” Sage said, watching them. “She trusts you.”

He shrugged. “When Kara first had her, she spent a lot of time at our house before they moved away. It was kinda cool being an uncle, and I guess that never left.”

Sage nodded. “You’re a good uncle.” She heard the words in her heart before she said them. “And a really good guy.”

A half-smirk came to his face. “You have to say that ‘cause you’re my girlfriend.”

“No. I’m your girlfriend because I can say that.”

When Luke dropped her off later, he couldn’t help but feel the simple pleasure in just being with her. They had watched the Sox win with his whole family, and she fit right in. Hannah, his mother, Alyssa—they all loved her, and so did he.

“So,” he said, leaning his arm up onto the bricks of the entrance as she leaned back on them and looked at him. “Tomorrow?”

“Do you think we can get them finished?”

He smiled. “Long as I’m with you, I think I can do about anything.” Softly, tenderly, he bent down and captured her lips with his. In all his life he would never be able to account for what that did to him. He straightened and took both of her hands in his. “I love you, you know that?”

Her smile danced across his heart. “Not half as much as I love you.”

“Eep!” Sage bounced up and down clapping. “They’re going to love them!”

From his spot sitting on his heels spraying the final coat of polyurethane on the last end table, he looked up, took one look at her bouncing there, shook his head, smiled and went back to his spraying.

“What?” she asked, pouting when she saw his look. “I’m excited. I can’t be excited?”

Luke stood and put his arm around her. “You can be as excited as you want, darlin’. I’m not stopping you.”

“Eep!” With no pause she went right back into uncontrollable squealing cheerleader mode.

He took a breath and stepped back. “Well, we’ve got to let that dry for about an hour before we start moving it.” Shaking the can of spray, he turned and went back into his shop. “Oh, Mom told me to tell you she loves the cushions.”

“Oh, well, thanks. I thought they turned out pretty well. I wish I could’ve gotten some edging for them, but that was special order and well…” She picked both hands up like jazz hands. “No time.”

“I thought they turned out great too. Mrs. Mitchell didn’t mind you borrowing her sewing machine?”

“She helped me some last night. We were up way too late.” Sage smiled that smile only she could. “Did you know she’s sewn all the costumes for the Christmas play? She’s really talented.” Over in the corner, Sage hoisted herself up onto the work bench and crossed her legs.

Luke took one look at her and the thought that she could be a tool model any day went through his head. The radio hummed from the other side as he went about sucking up the wood shavings into the shop vac. The place was too small to let it get too out-of-hand dirty. For her part, Sage simply sat and watched him.

The hose slipped down and around the legs of the miter saw and bumped right into an old can of Coke someone had left there.

“Ah, man.”

“Oop. No worries.” In one heartbeat, Sage jumped off the workbench and grabbed the rag lying there to sop up the sticky brown substance. “This is what you get for trying to clean up.”

Luke accepted the rag from her and put it down to sop up the liquid. “Tell me about it. Who leaves Coke laying around?”

It was then that Sage turned, and heart, body and soul she stopped, blinking. Curious, she tipped her head to the side because just behind the black and red toolbox she saw the Sa and part of what looked like a g. But it couldn’t be a g.

As he continued to work on the mess on the floor, she walked over to the thing and gently pulled out from the dark of its hiding spot. Her name in delicate scrolling letters carved out of wood and adorn with a flower set perfectly into the S stared back at her. Her heart jammed into the words to ask. “Is…?”

A second, and when she turned holding the thing, he was standing right there in the middle of the workshop, the rag at his foot totally forgotten. He had his hand on his beltline drowning in what looked like embarrassment as he looked at her. Bumping the shop vac off, he lifted his hand and put it to the back of his head. “I’m sorry. You weren’t supposed to see that.” And with that, he came over to her and took the thing from her.

Her hands felt instantly empty. “What? Why not?”

“It’s just… It’s something. I wasn’t…” He was at the workbench, moving things around not really to a better spot just to different ones.

It took only a second to decide, and gently Sage stepped over to him. Just a breath away, she stopped. “What if I love it?”

At that his breath caught, and he looked down at her.

She saw it under the plaid of one of the rags he had flipped over it on the bench, and her heart snagged on his hurt. “Why would you not want me to see it?”

Luke turned then, crossed his feet as he leaned against the workbench, his head down. When he said nothing, Sage came over to him, put her hands on his crossed arms and gazed up into his face.

“You have an amazing talent. It shouldn’t be locked up in here, hidden away like something you’re embarrassed about.”

“It’s just… it’s so stupid. Wood? Who even cares about wood?”

“You do.” Her gaze was right there waiting when his came up. “And there’s a reason God made you love it. You can build things, Luke. Amazing things. Things that make the world a better place. Things that are beautiful that make other people happy.”

His eyes felt as though they wanted to tear from her gaze, but she wouldn’t let them.

“Don’t let anybody ever tell you that’s not special, that it’s not worth something.”

“I was just messing around.”

“Well, imagine what you could do if you took it seriously then.” She smiled at the trying-to-stay-mad look he gave her. “You can do things other people could never dream of doing. I mean I could see the bench, but I couldn’t make the bench. And I love…” Reaching over, she picked up the little name plate and tossed the rag off of it. “…this.”

He put his hand on the back of his head. “You really don’t think it’s stupid?”

“Hey.” Taking one step back she kicked him and then held it up. “It’s my name. You callin’ my name stupid?” But she smiled to take the edge off the question. Then her eyes lit up. “Eep!”

His eyes dropped further. “Uh-oh.”

“No!” Her eyes went wider. “I totally know what I could do with this. I’m thinking yellow and white, with kind of a blue vine and green down here. Eep! It will be epi-licious.”

Luke couldn’t stop the laugh. “Why do I think I’m going to be making 4,000 of these for Christmas?”

“Oh!” Her mouth dropped open. “You are so right! We can start now. Hannah and Kara, and Priscilla, and Alyssa, and one for your mom…”

An hour later, Sage had every name plate she wanted made drawn out, and Luke was beginning to think he might never see the light of day again.

“Okay, so there’s only one small problem in this plan of yours,” he said, not wanting to douse her enthusiasm but knowing he needed to point out the obvious.

“What’s that?”

“Well, first of all, how are you going to paint them all? You’re going to be in California?”

The word dimmed her excitement instantly.

“And… you’re going to do all this work, and you probably won’t even be here for Christmas.”

That took the rest of her energy. Sage sat down on the little stool over by the radio, and her shoulders slumped. “Doesn’t mean I don’t want them to have something nice from us.”

Us. Even in the face of everything, she still thought of them as a couple.

“Well,” Luke said, picking up one small block of wood and glancing at her drawings. “I guess I could always ship them to you when I got them done.”

A sad smile came up to him. “True. And we have three weeks before I leave. Maybe we could get a lot of them done now.”

Three weeks. Crazy how that sounded like tomorrow.

When they pulled up at the pastor’s house in his dad’s pickup with the two end tables tied down in the back, Luke took one look at the little parking lot and panicked. He glanced over at her, and her wide eyes told him she had seen as well.

“Dad.” She exhaled on the word like a pin had pricked her and let all the air out. Sage looked over at Luke who had no idea what to do next.

“You want to come back?” he asked. “We could go home and swing back by in a little while.”

Serious consideration crossed her face, but then she shook her head. “No. He’s avoiding me. I’m not avoiding him.”

That didn’t settle anything in Luke, but he swung into the parking lot and pulled up next to her father’s vehicle. This was going to be a study in awkward he really didn’t want to take. Getting out, he went to the back where she joined him, and he carefully unlatched the tie-downs. With each release, he checked the pieces of the end tables, almost hoping one would be damaged so they would have a reason to go home.

He vaulted himself up into the pickup bed. “Just help me get it down.”

“K.” She stood at the end of the tailgate and eased the piece of furniture down as he carefully lowered it to her. One down, he went back and got the other one.

He wished she could be her normal bubbly self over the deal, but he knew why she wasn’t. He wasn’t particularly looking forward to this either. “K. You get that side. We’ll take one up to the door and then the other. Then we can at least semi-surprise them.”

Without a single protest, Sage did her part, and in no time, the end tables were on the front porch.

Luke looked over at her. “You ready?”

As if “ready” meant being thrown into a volcano, Sage nodded, and wishing there was some other way, Luke reached over and rang the doorbell. Hands on beltline, he waited, thinking he might have to catch Sage if she actually passed out like she looked like she might.

Just as his nerves hit hyper-overload, the door swung open.

“Luke?” Mrs. Mitchell asked in surprise. “And Sage…?” However, her gaze went not just to them but to the two tables.

“Surprise,” Sage said, putting her hands out and shaking them jazz-hand style although she sounded decidedly low-key.

“Surprise? What…?” Mrs. Mitchell looked at Sage. “I don’t understand.”

Sage wound her lips under her teeth, a little of the excitement finally coming back. “A thank you present for all you’ve done for me.”

“A…? You don’t have to do that.”

However, Sage smiled. “Well, we just did.”

“Who is it?” Pastor Steve came out of his office and right to the door with his wife.

She pushed the door open wider. “It’s Luke and Sage. They brought us a present.”

“A…” and with that he joined his wife on the front porch.

Luke was beginning to doubt the wisdom in this little surprise as both recipients appeared quite perplexed.

“I didn’t… Where did you get these?” the pastor asked as if they were now wanted for grand theft end table.

“We made them,” Sage said. Then she reached over and put her hand on his arm. “Well, Luke did most of the making. I just supervised.”

“You… made these?” Mrs. Mitchell asked, glancing at her husband.

“We did.” Sage’s spirit was starting to dip again, and Luke had no idea how to catch it.

“Sage wanted to do something nice for the two of you,” Luke said. “She noticed that your end tables needed some help, so rather than try to steal them and fix them, we decided to make you new ones.”

A breath and Pastor Steve shook his head with a smile. “Well, I don’t know what to say. Sage, you didn’t have to do that.”

“I know,” and her eyes turned misty. “I wanted to.”

“Hm. Well, look, sweetheart,” Pastor Steve said, turning to his wife. “Apparently we have a new set of end tables.”

Jane’s smile went up and ended in a stream of tears. “They’re beautiful.”

“Oh. Oh. No. Only happiness,” Sage said, going over to wipe away her tears.

Mrs. Mitchell laughed. “Oh, believe me, these are definitely happy tears.”

“Here, Luke.” Pastor Steve came over and lifted the other side of one. “Nice and sturdy. Wow, honey, our place is going to look like a palace with these.”

Together with Jane, Sage went up and into the door, holding it just long enough for the pastor to catch it with his foot. “Careful.” However, it was when she turned into the dim hallway that reality and life came back to her with a snap.

There, standing in the pastor’s office doorway stood her father. Hands in pockets, head down. Then he lifted his gaze and looked right at her. For one second, she had no idea what to do. Then suddenly Mrs. P said right in her ear, You are the key. Your love don’t have nothing to do with them. “Hi, Dad,” Sage said, stepping up to him. For a split second no one and nothing moved, even the movers behind them stopped completely.

Dropping her gaze, Sage picked up her hands a fraction of an inch, unsure of going any farther.

A second of recognition and her father’s eyes turned liquid. “Hi, Sage.”

“Hi,” she squeaked out just before he stepped to her and put his arms around her. In that instant her eyes filled with tears, and she had to sniff them back. The hug was quick and slightly awkward, and when Sage let go and looked at him, he ducked, swiped at his nose, and stepped back.

“Uh, here,” her father suddenly said, striding past her for the end table, “I can help.”

As she stood there, the three of them muscled the furniture into the living room and then had a time of rearranging to get it in place.

“Here,” Jane said, “I’ll clean this one off. You can bring the other one in.”

Sage felt hopelessly useless in all the activity, so she mostly stood out of the way in the corner and watched. In no time they had the second one placed as well.

“I think we can take these over to the church later,” Pastor Steve said. “I’m sure someone would love to have them.”

“Oh, aren’t they beautiful?” Jane said next to his side, and she folded her hands to her mouth as if she might cry again. “Thank you both so much.” She hugged Luke first and then headed for Sage.

“Don’t thank me,” Luke said. “It was all Sage’s idea. She drew them up and everything.”

“Yeah, but Luke put them together.”

Her father went over to one and examined it. “These are really well made. I’m impressed.” He straightened and shook Luke’s hand. “How are you with fixing furniture? I’ve got a dresser that the drawers are just a nightmare.”

“He’s great.” Sage jumped into the conversation. “He fixed his grandparents’ dresser and even went to Greely to get just the right handles.”

Luke shrugged. “It wasn’t that big of a deal.”

Narrowing his eyes, her father surveyed him. “I’ll talk to Emily. I bet she’d love to have that thing fixed.”

A pause enveloped the room for a moment.

“Well,” Pastor Steve said, “why don’t we leave them to this and finish up, Gregory?”

“Oh. Yes. Wonderful.” However, her father cut his gaze over to hers, and Sage read the message loud and clear. He wanted her nowhere near that conversation.

She giggled softly. “I think Luke and I will just take these old end tables to the church.”

“Oh,” Jane started.

“No.” Sage held up her hand. “We can handle it. Can’t we, Luke?”

He looked as if he’d just been shot with an arrow. “Oh, yeah. Of course. We can.”

And in no time, her father and the good pastor were back behind closed doors, and Sage was wrangling furniture across a parking lot. How she had gotten here, she had no accounting for. This thing was heavier and far more awkward than she had guessed.

“What do you think they’re talking about?” Luke asked, honestly carrying most of the table even though she really was trying.

“What else? What to do about the problem of Sage.” She shrugged. “It’s like that Sound of Music song. ‘How do you solve a problem like Sage?’ Same song, fifteenth verse.”

Luke hated seeing her like this. Beaten down, defeated, accepting her fate—whatever they decided that would be. It was crazy because no matter how far they came from that space, her family had a way of slamming her right back there with seemingly no effort at all. “Do you think they’re even going to ask you? What you want I mean?”

“What I want?” She snorted as she opened the doors to the church and held them with her back and outstretched arms. “When has that ever mattered to anyone?”

Wrestling the piece in, Luke stopped to explain to Mildred what their plan was, and she acquiesced and let them into the small hallway off to the side of the church and then into one of the back offices that was only ever used for storage. Once inside, Luke set the table by the wall and turned, only to find Sage already in and the door shutting behind her. In the dim light that was coming from under the door, he let out a breath and stopped his movement afraid he would run into something or her if he took even a step.

“Oh. Um. Light… switch?” Sage laughed, going back to the wall and trailing her hand over it to find one.

“Don’t.” With a step around the end table, Luke stopped her search.

“Don’t?” She sounded breathless and a little afraid as she turned back to him. “Why not?”

Gently he put his hands on her arms. “You know I love you, right?”

Breathless suddenly sounded panicked. “Luke?”

“You know I love you, right?” Thankfully the light began to grow with the adjusting of their eyes to it, and Luke could now see her now, looking at him wild and worried. He breathed down his own nerves. “Look, I think you have to tell them. You have to tell them what you want.”

“What I…?”

“Listen to me, Sage. None of this is fair to you. Not being banished to the pastor’s…”

“That hasn’t been…”

“Not even being banished here to North Carolina in the first place. But Mrs. P was right the other day when she said you’re the key.” He shook her softly. “You are, Sage. Just like the other night with Jaycee. You stood up to Rory and got her out of there. You did that. None of us expected that. But it was because you made a decision and went for it. You need to do that with this. You need to step up and say, ‘This is what I want.’”

Her head fell and then shook. “But I don’t even know what that is.”

Luke’s heart went out to her as he collected her into his arms. He felt her fear and confusion in his own soul. “Do you really not know, or are you afraid to ask?”

Summoning her courage, Sage backed up and dragged her gaze up to his. “You know, all my life I’ve been told what I want, what I should want. I should want a bigger house. I should want nice cars and fancy clothes. I should want to go to all the right parties and be seen with the right people. I should want all this stuff. And I did. I wanted it because I was supposed to. I did all those things because those were what I should want to do.”

His eyes searched hers, and although there was concern, Sage knew in that moment she could tell him anything, and he would never condemn her or trash her for it. “And now?”

“Now…?” Liquid filled her eyes. “Now, I can’t imagine going back to that, to being that person. I hated it. I hated being that. I mean I can’t even imagine dissing Barbara Morris for driving a last year model car like we used to. I mean, who even cares? There are these people, people who stood in that line the other day and thanked me for giving them a little ham. They don’t care about last year’s car or this year’s car. They go home and they feed their kids rock soup, and…”

Slowly her gaze came up to his and held there. “I don’t want to go back to how it was before, but I don’t want to hurt my mom and Jason either. They’re expecting me to come home. And then there’s school and Pate and Mac.” She shrugged. “I mean, sure I haven’t heard from them in a while, but just not going home again? I can’t imagine doing that.”

She closed her eyes, fighting back the tears. “But then I think about leaving here, leaving you, and…” This time the tears really did take over, and Luke pulled her back into the safety of his arms. “How can I make everyone happy when whatever I do is going to be wrong?”

“Sage. Darlin’…”

“Luke? Sage?” the pastor’s voice cut through their conversation as he opened the door and snapped on the light.

Just like that, they stepped apart, and Sage brushed and swiped at her eyes, embarrassed enough for all of them. Luke took a step back from her, put his gaze on the carpet and his fists on his beltline.

“What’re you doing in the dark?” The pastor’s foot held the door open just enough, and Sage wanted to hide under the ratty sofa the light had uncovered.

Stepping even further back from her, Luke glanced at her once and then faced down the firing squad. “We were talking.”

“Talking?” The pastor didn’t sound too sure of that as he lifted one side of the table and her father lifted the other to bring it in. “I thought y’all were coming back for this one.”

Feeling like the last mismatched pair of Prada shoes on the sale rack, Sage kept her head down and held onto her heart and her breathing with both hands. She was sure this had just confirmed her reputation in both of the older men’s eyes.

“Actually.” Luke wound his arms at his chest, never so much as moving. “I was trying to help Sage sort out what she should tell y’all when we went back.”

“Tell us?” her father asked with both worry and concern lacing the statement. “About what?”

“About what comes next for her.”

Both men looked at her.

“See.” Luke uncurled and went over to her, and although she had misgivings about letting him, he put his arm around her and eyed both of them. “I’m guessing you’ve probably noticed she’s gotten to be real important to me, and well, I hope I’ve gotten to be real important to her too. But every time we get on something that feels like solid ground with all of this, all of a sudden you all start rearranging everything around us.”

Her father moved to protest, but Luke cut him off.

“Look, I know we’ve talked about this before, about how leaving her life dangling over a cliff ain’t fair. Well, I’ll be honest with you, I’m tired of seeing her run over by you all thinking you can just put her in limbo and leave her there.” He glanced down at her. “So I was just trying to do what I think you all should have done a long time ago… ask her what she wants in all of this.”

The two men glanced at each other.

“Have either of you ever even bothered to do that?” he asked. “Have you ever asked her what she wants?”

“I know this hasn’t been easy… on any of us,” her father said. “But she’s not the only…” Although he chose not to finish that, it didn’t take much to figure out where he was going with it.

“Not the only one you have to think about? Well, does she factor into the decision at all?” Luke bit out the words. “Does she?”

“Of course she does. What kind of question is that?”

“Luke,” Sage said softly, “it’s okay.”

He looked down at her and then right at her father. “Did you hear that?”

She put her hand on his chest to stop him. “Luke, please.”

“What?” her father asked.

“That. It’s the sound of someone trying to talk someone out of saying the truth. Do you know who the last one I heard say something like that was?”

“Luke, don’t,” she pleaded. “Just let it go.”

“Jaycee on Friday night when Rory was pawing all over her for everybody to see at the bonfire,” Luke said, and anger split across her father’s face. “And do you know who stepped in to keep your daughter from that wolf?” His gaze traced down to Sage’s, and she saw in them his no-holds-barred determination. “Sage did. That’s who.” Then his gaze went back to her father. “She stepped up because your family was in trouble, and family means something to her. She stepped in to save Jaycee from herself because your family is her family whether you want that to be the case or not.”

In quiet desperation, Sage shook her head. “It’s okay, Luke. Really. You don’t have to…”

“Do you hear her?” He never removed his eyes from her father’s. “Do you? She’s trying to tell me that it’s okay if you treat her like trash and make her feel like garbage. It’s okay if you toss her out like yesterday’s moldy pizza. It’s okay if you put her on a shelf and act like she doesn’t even exist when it’s not convenient for you.”

“Luke, really…” she said, knowing he was just making it worse.

“So, is it? Is that all she can ever hope to get from you? A few scraps thrown her way so she’ll feel grateful enough to go away and stop complicating your life?”

“Luke!” the pastor said in alarm.

“What?” Without fear, he looked right at them both. “That’s what he’s doing, isn’t it? You want me to lie and say, ‘Oh, everything is perfect. Everything is just peachy. He’s not toying with Sage and making her feel like trash’? Is that what you want, or do you want the truth? Because the truth is, she doesn’t deserve this, any of it. And I think she deserves to have a say in what happens to her. And she deserves for her father to want her in his life.”

“I do… want her.”

“Well, you sure have a weird way of showing that.”

At that her father sat down heavily on the frayed gray couch and put his head in his hands. “I don’t know. I don’t know how to fix any of this.” His gaze came up to hers. “I’m sorry, Sage. I really am. I thought… I thought I could do this. Be the dad you needed me to be, but trying to be that hurt other people that I really care about.”

The words knifed through her, but Sage completely understood. “Emily.”

He nodded. “She can’t forgive me for what I did, and she blames you for it. I get that. I just don’t know how to fix it.” His grieving eyes came up to hers. “I know it’s not your fault. I know it’s all mine, but when we talked, you and I, before, Em… well, she…. It got really ugly. Everywhere I look, there’s just more questions and more hurt and more pain, and I know I’m the one who caused all of it, but I can’t figure out how to fix it… for any of you.” Ache screeched across his face as he shook his head. “I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry about everything. I never meant for this…”

Leaving Luke, Sage stepped over to the sofa and sat down. Carefully, gently, she put her hand on her father’s shoulder. “I wish I could wave a magic wand and make all of this go away. Part of me even says I should just go back to California and maybe that would make everything better.”

Luke dropped his gaze and swung it away from her, more hurt than she had ever seen him. It killed her to do that to him, but if she was being honest, she had to admit the thought had crossed her mind. “But I also know running isn’t going to fix this.” She looked up at the pastor. “You said God could do the impossible. Do you really believe that?”

A second and the pastor nodded though he looked just slightly unsure of that himself.

“Well,” Sage said as she looked back down at her father, “maybe you can’t fix it, but maybe that’s because only God can. I know the other night when Rory was acting like an idiot, I didn’t know how to make him quit. All I knew was I had to do something. So I did something and God filled in the blanks.” She looked up at Luke and held her hand out to him. A second and he accepted the offer. “It’s what Luke’s been doing with me. He didn’t know how to fix this mess either, but that didn’t stop him from trying. Not that everything he did worked or seemed to work at the time, but he didn’t give up. He hasn’t. He keeps trying and keeps talking and keeps loving me—even when from the outside that looked about as promising as the ocean running dry tomorrow.”

Carefully Luke sat down beside her, and she knew God had a plan even if she didn’t see all of it.

“I don’t know everything or really even much of anything, but what I do know is I don’t want to be away from him. I need him because I don’t know how to be me without him around. It’s like without him, I’m on the wrong side of the mirror, acting like Sage but not really being her.” She let her gaze go back to her father. “And I know Emily is the same for you.

“I don’t want to come between you even though I know I have. What I want is for us to find a way that this can be okay for everybody. So I guess we’re on the same side with that, huh?”

Her father nodded as his gaze fell back to his lap.

The pastor let out a long breath. “You know, maybe it’s time to do some family counseling about this. Do you think Emily would be amenable to that, Greg?”

He shook his head in desolation. “I don’t even know at this point.”

However, this time Sage wasn’t going to just give in. “Well, then maybe we all need to start praying for her. I know praying for Jayc helped me, even if it hasn’t exactly brought her around. Maybe if we can we pray together, Pastor?”

“Sure.”

And then they did. All together in that small, shabby, mismatched room, they bent their heads and prayed for everyone in the situation. And Sage continued that prayer for the next three days.

“Okay, I’m officially freaking out here,” Sage said on Wednesday night as she lay on her bed at the pastor’s house talking to Luke on the phone. “They just told me Dad and Em are coming tomorrow to talk.”

“Really? That’s great.”

“I don’t know, Luke. I don’t. What if they decide to send me back? I’ve only got two weeks the way it is, but…”

“So you are going back in two weeks?” He sounded worried.

“What choice do I have? I can’t camp out here with the pastor and Jane forever. They have their own lives, and this was never meant to be a permanent solution. Besides, it’s like I said, Mom and Jason will be home by the 20th. They’re going to expect me to come home.” She was trying to get all right with that idea, and she really hoped he was too. The very last thing she wanted to do was smash his heart.

Why did everything she said have to sound so logical? And if it was so logical, why did it feel so soul-splitting? The rest of the night, Luke spent in prayer, not even sure what he was praying for anymore. He wanted to pray for her to stay, but was that the right thing? He thought about praying for the right thing, but what if that meant her going back to California?

Finally, deep into the night, he quit fighting, got up, grabbed a Dr. Pepper from the refrigerator and went out to sit on the porch. He put his head back on the siding and stared up at the deepening night sky. “Why does life have to be so confusing, God?” He took a drink and wiped his mouth. “I just want what’s best for her.” And even saying it, threatened to tear him in two. “Show us what that is. And whatever it is, help me to be able to deal with it.”

Chapter 36

In her soft gray crosshatch blazer and miniskirt with her white shell top, Sage sat in Pastor Steve’s office, praying that Luke was praying for her as she had asked him to. She needed all of the prayers she could get.

“Although I think we’re all aware that this meeting is simply a beginning,” Pastor Steve said, “I do think there are issues we need to get on the table so everyone is aware of them. So, Sage, if you don’t mind, I’d like to start with you.”

She nodded and her own prayers ramped up.

“I’d like to hear your thoughts on the current living arrangements and what you think should change and how.”

Considering everything, it was a downright miracle she didn’t run. “Well, Pastor.” She managed to look right at him, and in his eyes, she found only compassion. “I really, really appreciate everything you and Ja… I mean, Mrs. Mitchell have done for me. You’ve taught me so much, and I love being here.” Letting out a breath, she closed her eyes to gather her courage. “But the truth is, when I came here to North Carolina, I didn’t expect to be living with people I didn’t even know.” The shrug was like that of a small child. “I’m sure it’s naïve and everything, but I had this… this fantasy about coming and meeting my family, what it would be like to have a brother and a sister, and a dad and a mom.

“But then I think when I’m over there, I’m just in the way. I know I’m not wanted there, and so that makes me feel like it’s better if I stay here. But then I know I’m in the way here too because you and Mrs. Mitchell have your own lives and you don’t have the time to be worrying about me all the time. I guess I just feel in the way no matter where I am, which makes me think I should just go back home, but the truth is, I’m pretty much in the way there too.” Sage, keep it together. Breathing down the tears took a long, slow almost inhuman breath, but just saying the words was akin to treason, crying would surely betray her upbringing all the way down.

“Sage,” her father said, “you’re not in the…” Then his gaze snagged on his wife who sat bolt upright, a scowl on her face.

With one look at her stepmother, Sage gave up the fight. “But I am. And you and I both know it.” Her eyes blinked closed on the pain. “Maybe I should just call Mom and tell her I’m coming home…”

“Okay, now hold on there.” The pastor held up his hand. “I don’t think going back is any kind of solution to this—not without some major discussion with your mother anyway. Sending you back into a home where there is alcoholism and the kind of behavior you’ve been exposed to… Well, I’m not willing to watch that happen, and I know Jane is not either.” He let out a breath and looked at her parents. “Jane and I have talked about this, and we’re willing to let Sage stay here through the school year if necessary.”

Sage’s eyes jerked open wide. “Wh…? Stay here?” Shaking herself, she sat back in shock.

“Pastor,” Emily said. “Don’t misunderstand, we’re very grateful, but we can’t just dump our problems on your doorstep and expect you to…”

“Sage is my daughter,” her father said. “I don’t think I would feel right…”

The pastor held up his hands to stop them, and after a moment they all stopped. Slowly he lowered his hands. “In my experience when there is a wound, you do certain things in order. First, you get the bleeding to stop. Then you assess the next steps needed for healing and take the appropriate action.” He glanced at Sage. “For the last couple of weeks, we have slowed the bleeding, but I think all of us recognize that this solution was only temporary. I think it’s time to assess and see what our next steps should be to find a permanent solution.”

A breath and the pastor continued, “When I look at the situation, I see that Emily is not ready for Sage to come back to your home. I couldn’t in good conscience send Sage back to California although I’m practical enough to know that is going to take some frank, rational conversations about what is truly best for her.”

Emily swept her hand back over her hair and shook her head. “I just don’t see why she can’t go back where she came from. She should be her mother’s problem. Not ours.”

Problem. Crazy how often Emily referred to her as that. Sage breathed that understanding down into her heart and clamped it there.

“I don’t know how much Gregory has shared with you,” the pastor said evenly, “but the things Sage has shared with us about her mother and alcohol and her stepfather and other women…”

Squaring her shoulders and lifting her head, Emily looked as if she was sniffing at something that smelled awful. “Well, what more could you expect from that woman?”

“That…” all three of them said at the same time.

Her father was the first to recover. “Em? If this was Jaycee, would you say the same thing?”

That seemed to shake Emily from the self-righteousness a miniscule bit.

“If we were talking about sending Jaycee to California to live with them like this, would you really put her on that plane and say, ‘Good luck’? Come on, Em. This isn’t you. It isn’t. You can’t think this is right. You can’t just throw her out and be okay with that.”

Emily bit her lip. “But this isn’t about us. It’s not Jaycee.”

“It is though. Sage is every bit my daughter as Jaycee is, and I can’t do that to either one of them.” He turned to her and took her hands in his. “Look, I know you think this is some kind of contest, Sage or you, but I can’t think like that. It has to be Sage and you and Jaycee and Ryder. I’m responsible for all of you, and I can’t keep pushing Sage away like she doesn’t exist because she does.” Standing, he came over to where Sage sat. “And if you let yourself look for just one second, you’d see that she’s a beautiful, amazing young woman that we should be proud to call our daughter.”

That looked like Emily had just swallowed something rotten and painful. “She’s not our daughter.”

“No,” Sage said softly, and she stood and went over to sit at her stepmother’s feet. “I’m not your daughter, but I don’t want to be your enemy either.” Tears sprang to her eyes. “I’m sorry about what my mom did to you. I am. If I could go back and change it, I would, but I can’t. I don’t know why this happened, but it did. I’m not asking you to love me because I know you probably never will. All I’m asking is that you don’t completely hate me forever because the truth is, I love our family. I love Ryder. He’s so awesome. And Jaycee. Well, she has her moments, but then again, so do I, right? And I want to get to know Dad and you, but I can’t do that like this.”

Sage thought it through, and she knew her fate rested in this woman’s hands. “The truth is, if you won’t let me, then I guess… well, I guess it really was just all a little girl’s dream about what being in a real family might be like.” Letting go of that dream hurt more than she had thought it would, but as she looked into Emily’s stone-cold face, she knew there really was no other option. “For what it’s worth, Jaycee and Ryder are really lucky to have a mom like you. You fight for them, for your family… I really wish I had that.”

Sniffing, Sage rocked up to her feet and then stood. She went over to the pastor’s desk where she put out her hand though she could hardly hold his gaze. “Thank you for everything you’ve done for me, Pastor Steve. I won’t forget that tea cup. I promise.” With a nod, she turned to her father, walked over to him, and gave him a short hug. “I think I should call Mom and see when they’re going to be home.”

“Sage…” he and the pastor said.

“No.” She turned to both of them and sighed. One glance at Emily confirmed her decision. “It’s time for me to go home.”

“But…” the pastor said.

“It’s okay. I can handle it. What’s one more year, right?” And with that, she lowered her gaze, turned and walked out.

Gregory’s heart walked out with her, and when he turned, he knew Steve was no different. They looked at each other. “We can’t let that happen, you know.”

“I know.” Steve glanced at Emily helplessly.

“Mom.” Sage forced bright and cheerful over the tears and prayed her mother didn’t hear the sniff.

“Oh, Sage? Um, where are you?”

Looking around the room at the pastor’s, Sage wondered how much she should tell her mother. “Still in North Carolina. Where else would I be?”

“Oh, good.” Her mother sounded incredibly relieved about that. “Well, how’s it going?”

“Uh. Great. Listen, Dad and I were just talking about when I’m supposed to be going back.”

“Back? Oh, back. Of course. Did he not schedule that already? I thought we talked about that.”

Anger boiled up inside of Sage. Maybe they had talked about it, but no one had mentioned any details to her. Surprise. Surprise. “Oh, well, we were just wanting to confirm, you know, firm up plans from this end.” Her voice got that excited little-girl squeak into it, and she was proud of herself for how easily the act came back to her. “So where are you anyway?”

“Me?” It was as if her mother had forgotten she was supposed to be somewhere. “Oh, in… uh, Tuscany.”

Sage quirked her head. “Tuscany? I thought you already did Tuscany?”

“Did we…? Oh, well, of course. But it was so beautiful, we decided to come back. Listen, sweetheart, I’ve really got to go. Can we finish this some other time?”

“But Mom, I really need….”

“I know, sweetheart. I know. Tomorrow. I promise. I’ll call you. Take care of yourself, and be good. Okay?”

Before she got another protest out, her mother was gone.

Letting the phone fall to her lap but determined not to let the tears fall, Sage shifted into Plan B. Her fingers flew over the keys. Hey, Patelyn. How’s life, girl? What have you been up to?

The reply came in almost immediately. Oh, girl! I thought you fell off the planet.

Sage sniffed, reaching for Sage Hollywood though it was a good thing she only had to be that over text. No. Just got a couple of terminal cases of grounded, but I’m back. What’s going on with you?

Luke waited until nearly four when the silence was killing him. He texted and then texted her again. Finally he tried to call, but it went straight to voicemail.

“Hi, this is Sage,” her perky voice said. “Talk to me.”

“Sage, this is Luke. I’m wondering what’s going on, how things went. Let me know.” He waited another second before hanging up. If she was trying to drive him crazy, it was working.

Long after the house had grown quiet, Sage lay on her bed and stared up at the ceiling. No one wanted her. Not really. The pastor said they would keep her. That was something, wasn’t it? But what did it say about her that it wasn’t her parents standing up to say they wanted her to live with them? Sure, her mother would if she would stay on the phone for more than a couple of minutes at a time. Even Patelyn had something else to get to.

Of course, Sage had seen the messages from Luke, but what could she say to him? He would just get upset and that wouldn’t help anything—including him. No, the sad fact was her life made everyone else’s so much more complicated. That was the only real way to see it, and for the life of her, she couldn’t figure out how to make that stop.

It was bad. By six-thirty Luke could convince himself of nothing else. Heading out, he met his mother coming in.

“Where’re you going?” she asked in surprise.

“Sage isn’t answering. I’m going to see what’s going on.”

“Is she still at the pastor’s?”

“Who even knows at this point? They were supposed to talk with her folks today. I thought that was going to do some good, but now she’s not answering, and that’s never a good sign.”

His mother sighed. “You know, when she first came… Well, let’s just say I hope she’s not answering because she went home.”

Luke’s heart smashed into the word.

“No,” his mother laughed softly. “Her home. With Greg and Em.”

“Oh.”

“Maybe that’s why she’s not answering. Maybe she’s moving back.”

He would have loved to hope that, but Luke knew bad news around Sage stayed very, very quiet. And right now, it was as silent as a tomb. “I’ll be back.”

“Good luck. I’ll be praying!” she called as he went down the walk.

Luke waved in acknowledgement, got in the car, and pulled out. Maybe his mom was right. Maybe she wasn’t answering because she was moving home. Home. Here home. Not California home. Why did his spirit keep shrieking that correction? He couldn’t account for it, but when his car got to the Lawrences’ turn, he decided it couldn’t hurt to just check. It would save him a trip into town and showing up at the pastor’s as if he was playing hide-and-seek.

In the driveway, he set his focus, parked, and went up to the door where he knocked. A few seconds and the door squeaked. He blinked, suddenly remembering all the reasons he should not have come. “Jayc?”

“Luke?” She sounded surprised and looked even more so.

“Uh.” He put his hand up to his head. “Is… Is Sage here?”

“Sage?” Jaycee asked as if she had no idea who that was.

His patience snapped. “Yeah. Sage. You know, your stepsister? About yea-high. Blonde hair.”

For one second Jaycee looked like she was about to let him have it; however, she sucked that back in. “She’s not here. I… I think she’s going back to California.”

The word hit him like a punch. His eyes fell closed on the pain that surged into him. “I knew it.” Turning he slammed his foot into the porch post. “Dang it.” He put his hands up onto his head and raked them there before jerking them down to the railing where his fingers turned white for the ache tearing through him. It took effort to drag control over the whipsawing emotions. “Just like that. They’re just going to send her back.”

Coming out onto the porch, Jaycee looked slightly terrified but also worried. “Mom said they talked about it and decided…”

“They.” He spun on her. “Let me guess. Your mom and your gutless father.”

“Hey.” She came out of the fear and readied for attack.

“What?” he asked as if even she had to see that what they were doing was wrong. “First they banish her to the pastor’s, and now they’re going to send her back to that hell-on-earth in California.”

“It’s California,” Jaycee said, letting the sarcasm drip from the words. “It’s so tragic.”

“You know, if you would step outside of your pity party for like two seconds, you might actually learn that there are other people who are hurting here too.”

“What? Ms. Perfect Princess? Yeah, I’m sure things are so horrible in her world.”

“Well, let’s see. She’s got a stepsister who hates her. A stepmom who wishes she’d never been born. A mother who’s a drunk, a stepfather who’s bringing in tramps, and then there’s your dad who is perfectly willing to feed her to the wolves because helping her is too likely to shatter his perfect little family image.”

Jaycee’s face twisted. “She’s just a drama queen.”

“And you’re not?”

“That’s not fair.”

“Fair? You’re going to stand there and talk to me about what’s fair? Was it fair to turn everyone against her? Was it fair to trash her in front of your friends and me before she even got here? You have had nothing but horrible things to say about her, and you went so far as to say them to her face. And now you’re going to stand there and talk to me about fair? Try again, Jayc, because that dog don’t hunt.”

“Look, okay. I admit, I didn’t give her a chance, but look at her, she is everything I said she was. She’s rich and stuck-up and arrogant. She thinks she’s all that and everyone else is beneath her.”

He leaned on the porch railing and just watched her.

“You’ve seen how she dresses, what she’s like.”

“Oh, yeah? What’s she like?”

“She’s always got her nose in the air like she’s better than everyone else.”

“Hmm. That’s interesting because it seemed to me like you’re the one who’s trying point out how much better you are.”

“Me?”

“Yeah.” He shrugged. “You go out without her, won’t take her places. You make sure everyone knows what a burden it is to be seen with her. You do your level best to act like she’s not even alive. What if you were in her place? You think you wouldn’t keep to yourself, try not to make too many waves.”

“Waves? That girl’s like a tsunami.”

“The craziest thing is,” he said slowly as he looked at her, “that she stood up for you. She could have gotten pummeled trying to protect you. You know that, right?”

Jaycee wound her arms over themselves. “You know, that’s what I can’t figure out. Why did she do that? Why would she stand up for me like that? She knows I don’t even like her.”

Luke shrugged and snorted softly. “Who knows? Maybe in spite everything, she actually likes you and wants you to be safe. Maybe she was worried about her sister. What a concept, huh?” He kicked away from the porch posts. “Well, I’ve got to go see if she’s okay. Not that you would care about that or anything.”

“Luke…?”

“No, Jayc. We’re done here.”

“Sage, honey.” Jane was at the door, knocking softly.

“Uh, yeah.” Sage rolled over and swiped at her eyes, knowing she must be a complete mess. “Just a minute.”

Hurriedly she jumped up and straightened her horribly rumpled suit. It had seen better days. Her make-up was a disaster, running down her cheeks like the dam had burst upstream. Quickly, she grabbed remover tissues and swiped at her face, seeing the events of the day etched there in permanent ink. The wiping added more red than it took anything away.

“Sage?”

“Uh. Yeah. Hold… hold on.” Grief was taking over again even as she wiped and washed. Why wouldn’t her heart hold it all? Stop it already, Sage. Don’t cry. Don’t. Don’t be such a baby. Don’t start.

The door creaked and then came open.

Her hair was as much a mess as her make-up. No one could see her like this.

“There’s someone here,” Jane said, and Sage looked up into the silver of the mirror.

Without thinking, she turned to them and then thought better of that move. Frantic to cover up what she knew they could both see, she spun back for the mirror. “Luke? I didn’t know…” Yanking, smoothing, fixing, she curled over herself to keep him from seeing.

However, he didn’t so much as wait for more, just came right in and over to her. Without so much as a word, he turned her to him and drew her up into his embrace, strong and steady with no hesitation at all.

“Luke? What? Don’t. I’m a mess.”

But he held her there, arching over her now quaking body.

“Luke…” She picked up her hand to push him away, but it didn’t make it that far, instead it landed on his arm as the tears beat their way to the surface. “Don’t…” And with that, the dam burst open. “I didn’t… I’m sorry. I should have called… I didn’t mean to…” Tears upon tears washed over her, trekking down her face in gushing rivers. “You didn’t have to…”

“Shhh.” He soothed, running his hand over her head and down her back, gently holding her to him.

“Did you hear?” she finally asked.

“I didn’t have to. I knew when you didn’t text back.”

She had to tell him so he would quit like everyone else had. “I’m going back.”

He nodded but did not let her go.

“Did you hear me? I said I’m going back to California.”

“I heard you.” But he didn’t remove himself from around her.

“I thought you would be mad.”

“Darlin’, I know you’re working things out. That ain’t always easy. But I’m right here no matter what you decide.”

Confusion and hurt dripped over her lashes. “Nobody wants me.”

“Oh, come on now. That ain’t true. I want you more than the next breath. Why do you think I’m here?”

“They don’t want me. They don’t. I’m just one big problem to all of them.”

“Well, then they’re wrong. All of them. If they can’t see how awesome you are,” he said, backing up just enough to be able to look down at her, “how amazing and kind and wonderful, then they’re the one that has the problem.”

She looked up at him, not at all trying to hide the sorrow anymore. “Do you want me to go to California?”

He laughed softly and brushed back her hair. “Now what kind of question is that? You know as well as I do that you leaving is going to split me in half like firewood.”

“But you said…”

“I said, I’m right here no matter what you decide.” Then he lowered his gaze and drank her in. “And I am.”

Letting her gaze fall, Sage knew she had to be honest with him. “Emily hates me.”

“And this is different how?”

“No. She really hates me, Luke. She wants me to go back.”

Luke nodded as he watched her. “What do you want?”

“I’m making Dad’s life miserable.”

“I don’t think that one’s on you.”

“Yes. It is. You should have seen him today.”

“I saw him the other day, but I don’t think he’s laying this at your doorstep.”

“But if I leave, then they can go on and be the perfect, happy little family. It’s what they all want.”

“And you get no say in this? None. Even though it’s your life.”

She stepped out of his arms and sat on the edge of the bed. “Don’t you get it? Me leaving would solve so many problems for them.”

A second and he joined her, sitting next to her but making no move to put his arm around her. “And it would create so many for you.”

“But that’s just it. I’ve been there. I can do it. Just put Sage Hollywood back on.” She put out her jazz hands and shook them with a smile on her face before dropping them to her lap and crushing back the tears. “It’s what everyone wants.”

“But is it what you want?”

Her eyes traced over to his, and she shrugged. “When has that ever made any difference?”

“Supper,” Jane called just later when she knocked on the door. “Ham soup.”

Next to him, Sage sighed. “I’d better try to get this” she waved her hand over her face “presentable. You mind?”

Luke stood, bent down to kiss her on the forehead and then lowered his eyes to hold hers. “Do me a favor. Okay? Lighten up on the mascara. You look like a raccoon.”

What she had thought was coming, she had no idea, but that was not it. Her mouth dropped open, and before she could really recover, she laughed. Reaching up she punched his arm. “Now that wasn’t very nice.”

He bobbed his head side-to-side. “You want nice or honest?”

A second and still laughing, she looked right at him. “Honest.”

The mirth dissipated from his eyes and his mouth, leaving only seriousness in their wake. “I love you, Sage.”

And swept up in the honesty of that comment, the tears jumped into her heart. She lowered her gaze and nodded. “I know.”

“Okay. You know what?” Jane asked as they all sat around the table, spoons making about the only noise in the room. “I’m just going to say it.”

Her husband looked at her with panic.

“No,” she said firmly. “I am. Now we’re all sitting here traipsing around this elephant sitting in the middle of this table, and I’m tired of it.”

“Jane?” her husband warned.

“No. Steve.” She looked right at him and scowled. “Now look, I know we’re all knocking this thing around in our heads, but I think it’s about time we talk about it.” Laying her spoon down, she put her hands one atop the other on the table and looked right at Sage. “Now I know Steve talked to you today about you staying.”

Instantly Sage’s head lowered.

“Not just through the summer but when school starts too.”

She didn’t dare look at Luke. He was probably bewildered by the fact that they had even offered.

“And I know all about you thinking you need to go back. I get that. I understand. I really do. I mean, just leaving home, even when the situation is horrendous, that’s not an easy call. But I want you to know we are serious, Sage. If you want to stay, our door is open, and that room is yours.”

Pastor Steve let out a breath. “Jane is right. I didn’t push it today because I knew how much you were dealing with, but I just can’t get right with you going back. I made a vow to make a difference in this world, to do what was right in the face of evil, and the more I think about it, the more not at peace I am with the thought of you going back.”

“I think,” Luke said, and she felt his gaze on her, “it’s not so much about her wanting to go back. I think it’s more thinking if she goes, it would make things better here.”

With that Pastor Steve set his spoon all the way down. “You know, we get taught not to be selfish, and that’s a good thing. We get taught self-sacrifice and doing what we have to for those we love, and all of those are good things too. But putting yourself into a situation that is both dangerous and unhealthy just to try to make it so others don’t have to face their own stuff is not the answer. That’s called enabling, and it doesn’t fix anything. Jesus didn’t die for us on the cross so we wouldn’t have to work through the consequences of our actions and face things. He died so we wouldn’t have to work through them alone. Those consequences don’t go away with that magic wand you talked about. They only go away when we face them, deal with them, and put them behind us. Running away, going back especially like this is not the answer.”

“But they don’t want me.”

“Maybe not, but we do,” Jane said, and Sage’s gaze snapped to her. A second and she looked at her husband who with a breath nodded, hardly moving his head. She looked back at Sage. “There’s something we haven’t told you. Something… well, something I didn’t really think was pertinent until now.” She glanced at her husband again and then reached over and took Sage’s hands in hers. “Steve and I… well, we were never able to have children of our own. When we were younger, that was our dream. We wanted a big family. Five, eight, ten kids.”

Sage had a hard time picturing ten kids in this tiny house, but she kept her focus on the woman rather than the image.

Jane let her gaze fall to the table for a second. “We got pregnant several times, but I always lost the child about 12 weeks into the pregnancy. We never really knew why. So after a while, I put how much I wanted kids in a little box and I buried it in my heart. It wasn’t easy, but it was all I could think to do. This last month, having you here. It’s made me see that maybe I couldn’t be a mom the way I’d always thought I would, but maybe God had a different kind of being a mom in mind for me.” She shook her head. “I’m not your mother, and I’m not trying to take anyone’s place. But if you need me, if you need us, we want to be here for you.”

What to say? How to say it? Sage was spinning on the questions. “I just… I don’t know. I don’t know what to do. I’m just so confused.”

Pastor Steve nodded. “Where is God?”

Sage looked up at him. “In Heaven?”

He laughed. “No, Sage. Jesus said, ‘I have told you these things, so that in Me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.’ In Jesus we have peace. Where He is, we have peace. In the world, you will have trouble, trials, tribulation, but in God, when we’re really with Him, there we have peace. So where is God? In this whole situation, where do you have peace?”

Crazy as that sounded, Sage knew the answer instantly. Her gaze went over to Luke, and she couldn’t deny what she felt. “With Luke,” she said softly, and he smiled at her. “I definitely feel at peace with Luke.” Then she took another breath and looked over at them. “And here.” She shrugged. “I keep telling myself I’m supposed to be with the Lawrences or back home in California, but neither of those feel like peace to me. They just… don’t.” Lifting her shoulders, she grimaced at them. “I can’t explain that.”

“You don’t have to,” Pastor Steve said. “Sometimes there is no explanation other than God knows, and you’ve got to trust that.” He sat back and stared at his bowl. “You know, today, when you said you were going back to California, I can’t explain it, but I would’ve fought a tiger to keep that from happening.”

“And when Steve told me that’s what you’d decided.” Jane sat back and shook her head. “I’ve been praying all day that God would let me be okay with that. But I’m not. No matter how much I try to get myself to think that’s what’s for the best, I just know it’s not.”

Sage knew well how they both felt because she felt the same way. “But how… how does this work? How does this look? I mean, my mom, the Lawrences…?”

“I think your dad would be on board with it in a heartbeat if we just talk with him,” Pastor Steve said. “He’s beside himself with worry about you. I can’t speak to your mom though, and obviously, she would have to agree as well.”

The logistics were starting to drop on her like weights. “I haven’t even told her I’m living here.” She sighed softly before raising her eyes to see their reactions. Strangely they were nodding at her. “I kept thinking I should, but then, I just… didn’t.” Sage shook her head. “She’s going to completely freak out on me if I say I’m not coming home.”

“Doing something you know is wrong for you to make someone else happy…,” Pastor Steve said.

“I know. But doing what’s right for you when they aren’t going to be happy about it…”

He nodded. “I know.”

“How’s Sage?” Luke’s mom asked when he came in from the darkened kitchen to find her, feet propped up, reading in the living room. His father sat, snoring in the chair, the Sox game flashing on the television.

With a long sigh, Luke sat down on the couch in a heap. He needed someone to process with, and she had asked. “I sure wish I knew.”

That pulled the magazine down. “You didn’t find her?”

“Oh, I found her all right. She’s still at the pastor’s.”

“So she didn’t go home then?” Sadness and concern washed across his mother’s face.

“Nope. And that don’t look too likely either.” He shook his head. “You know, I can’t figure it. I always thought Mrs. Lawrence was so great. She was like a second mom to me. I mean, she picked us up after school, she fed us cookies. I always felt so welcome at their house.”

A tinge of anger settled over his mother’s face as she listened. “And now?”

“It ain’t about me.” He shrugged and sighed. “Sage pret-near got busted up the other night defending Jaycee.”

Worry overtook the anger. “What?”

Luke pursed his lips together. “It was a thing, with Rory, but it’s not about that.” He waved that off. “Point is, she stuck her neck out for them, and now she’s ready to pack up and go back to California just to make Mrs. Lawrence happy.” Letting out a breath, he shook head again. “It’s like everyone else is important in the whole world but her. She’ll put herself in harm’s way just so they can be happy.”

Now his mother folded the magazine and laid it aside. “Harm’s way? I don’t understand.”

“It’s just that back in California, things aren’t… well, they’re not all sunshine and happiness. Her mom’s a drunk. Her stepdad’s… well, he’s a tramp magnet if you want to know the real truth. They take off to Europe and send Sage all the way across the country to live with folks she hasn’t seen in 11 years. Then she gets here, and all she gets from the Lawrences is grief about everything. And now, she thinks going back to California is the way to fix things. Course that won’t fix anything for her, but…”

“Does the pastor know all of this?”

With a lift of his eyebrows, Luke sat forward. “Yeah. They know. They want Sage to stay with them even after school starts, but who knows if that would even work? She’s sure her mom would freak, and the truth is, Mrs. Lawrence ain’t going to let her have a minute’s peace if she stays. And I can’t even imagine her and Jaycee in the same school. They’d tear the place apart.” He sat forward and put his head in his hands. “Not to even mention that Jaycee will totally shred her before she steps a foot in that school, and Sage will never stand up to defend herself. She’d just let it happen. It’s like she cares about everybody else but herself.”

His mother looked at him softly. “You’re a good guy, Luke Baker, to care so much.”

“Yeah? Well, a fat lotta good that’s doing me now.”

Peace. It was such a strange word in Sage’s world. Image. Appearance. Perfection. Yes.

But not peace. Peace was a foreign concept. In fact, when the pastor had asked, Sage wasn’t sure she would even know what peace would feel like. What does something feel like if you’ve never felt it before? So it was crazy that she knew. How she knew, she still wasn’t sure. But when she thought about peace, things that let her spirit settle, she knew exactly what they were.

Lying on her bed later with the little reading light still on, she let her mind search and sort, and it was easy. Being at the beach with Luke? Peace. Sewing the little jacket? Peace. Painting? Outside swinging Alyssa? Peace. The second hand shop? Peace.

Then her mind spiraled backward to before she had come.

Sitting on her floor cutting the magazines to put together her perfect room? Peace. Pretty much everything else? Not peace.

Just letting go of forcing her feelings one way or the other, she continued backward. The old apartment? Strangely, there was peace in that memory. She hadn’t expected that at all. Her mother had assured her that life would be so much better when they got to Jason’s, but the second her thoughts tripped on that thought, no peace reached up and seized her entire being. Nothing about that new house had ever been peace. Nothing.

Only now, actually letting herself think through it, did she give herself permission to feel what was really there. Fear? Yes. Unworthiness? Yes. Effort and a bleak, all-encompassing white nothingness that filled everything about that vision? Yes. Empty.

When she gave herself permission to be brutally honest, empty was the word that floated to the surface at the thought of her home in California. It was a shell, a nice façade, whitewashed to cover all the hideousness that lurked just beneath the surface. That’s why it felt so utterly devoid of peace, because it was devoid of everything, including life itself.

Was that what her mother was running from in the alcohol? The total emptiness? As Sage thought about it, she realized that yes, that was a lot of it. If she would just numb herself to it, she wouldn’t have to see it, wouldn’t have to face it, to do anything about it. And Sage had done the same thing with parties and a social life that kept her out and away as much as possible. They were all running, all trying to find something to fill the emptiness that was swallowing them whole.

Her mind slid to her current living arrangements, and despite everything, she smiled. It wasn’t flashy or fancy, but it was full to the brim with love. Mismatched furniture, save for two gleaming new end tables, this house had a way of wrapping itself around you and giving you a much-needed hug.

As she let her spiritual eyes go where they wanted, they slid to the Lawrences’, and she heaved a sigh. It was weird how even here she could feel the malicious atmosphere that hung in the air there. No wonder there was no peace when she thought about the place. Peace did not reside there, and she wondered how long it had been gone.

“Knock. Knock,” the pastor said, and Sage sat up.

“Come in.”

He opened the door slowly, carefully before peering in. “You still awake?”

“Yeah.” She smoothed her hair down. “What’s up?”

Coming in, he gazed at her. “Quite a day, huh?”

She smiled softly. “Yeah.”

With a nod, he matched her smile. “I just wanted to make sure you’re all right.”

“All…?” she asked in surprise and then her smile softened even more as his concern for her touched her heart. “Can I ask you a question?”

“Absolutely.” Reaching over, he pulled a chair over and sat down. “What’s up?”

“A lot of things,” she said honestly. “But I’m kind of curious about the whole peace thing. I mean I’ve been thinking about everything, and some things, I know they’re peace, and some things, I know why I’ve been having such a hard time because they’re so not.”

He nodded but said nothing.

“Like Dad. He makes me crazy sometimes, but I really do feel like he’s trying to make this right for me.”

“That’s good because I agree with you. He doesn’t always know how to do that, but I think he’s trying.”

Sage absorbed that. “And then I think about my mom, and… well, this is going to sound awful, but I’m not even sure she thinks much about me at all anymore.”

“Oh? How so?”

“She used to, when I was little, but the last few years, not so much. It’s like she’s marking time to get me out of school, hoping we’ll get to that finish line sooner rather than later. I can’t remember the last time she even asked about things, how things were in my life. I think as long as I’m not pregnant or in jail, she assumes everything is fine. Or maybe she just hopes it is.”

“And how do you feel about that?”

The feeling yanked her head down. “Alone. Like I’m on my own figuring things out.” She lifted her shoulders. “I hate that. It scares me because I don’t feel like there’s anyone that has my back, that I can talk to about… well, anything. Boys and school and life.” That she was freaking him out was imminently apparent when she looked up at him. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t…”

“No.” He stopped her with one hand. “You need someone to talk to. I’ll live through it. I can almost guarantee it.”

The smile started small and then grew. “You sure about that?”

He laughed. “Trying to be. So back to what you were saying, ‘Boys, school, life…’?”

Sage pulled her shoulders up. “Sometimes it just all feels so big, so overwhelming. I mean I’ve talked with my friends, but they don’t have any answers either. And sometimes I wonder about the answers they do have.”

“Like?”

“Well, like boys. I mean, back home, the topic every Monday morning was who had been with who over the weekend. Who passed out at whose house. L.A. Housewives High School Edition.” She shook her head. “I grew up hearing how doing that had messed up my mom’s life. How she fell for a guy who talked a good game but when push came to shove, he left, and she had me to try to navigate. I didn’t want that. I still don’t. But it was never easy. Trust me, that wasn’t a very popular way of being.”

“I can imagine.”

“Lot of times I felt like a complete freak if you want to know the real truth. My friends made fun of me. The guys always pushed. They called me names, but…” She lifted her chin. “I promised myself I’d never let them get to me, that I knew what I wanted, and they weren’t talking me out of that, though some of them tried awful hard.

“When they told me I was coming here, I thought, ‘Finally. A clean slate’ you know? But the only thing that changed was adding a family that hated me and wanted me to disappear. Plus, it was pretty clear what everyone here thought about me.” The tears shimmered on her lashes, and she carefully brushed them away. The last thing she wanted to do was to return to the raccoon look. “I guess… I guess I’m asking for advice. How do I do this so I don’t feel so incredibly worthless and like I’m in everybody else’s way? Like I’m a freak from a foreign planet? Or is that even possible?”

He pursed his lips for a second and let out a sigh.

“I know, right?” she asked with a giggle. “No pressure there.”

“No.” The pastor shook his head. “I think that’s a question every one of us struggles with at some point. When you read about men and women who have changed the world—Ghandi, Mother Teresa, those kinds of people. When you read the things that they wrote, you begin to understand that in the midst of the struggle, they had doubts about life and even about God in Mother Teresa’s case. I think that life is kind of set up to make us feel like freaks, like we’re all alone in the face of life. Me? I was the son of a preacher, a good, Godly man who raised us kids right. That meant I caught a lot of flak for not drinking and for keeping the rules. I felt very alone and even lost a lot of the time. I would lie awake at night and talk to my ceiling.”

Sage laughed. “You too?”

“Oh, yeah. God and I had a lot of long discussions about the rules and how unfair it was that I had to keep them when seemingly everyone else didn’t.”

“So what did He say? What did God tell you?”

“Well, it wasn’t one conversation exactly. It was more watching what happened when other kids took the other paths. I saw a friend of mine killed in a drunk driving accident. I saw kids throw away their lives and their futures on drugs and parties. And the longer I went, the more I started to see that God’s way works. It’s not always fun in the moment, but in the end, God knows what He’s doing.” He pulled forward. “What I think is so interesting about your story is that you seem to have come to that conclusion from a completely different angle than most people get there. You grew up in the consequences of someone going outside the rules. You’ve seen firsthand the heartache that causes.”

She nodded. “I don’t think my mom ever got over Dad leaving. Not really. I think that’s why I understand what Emily must be feeling because I lived with my mom feeling the same stuff all those years. That she wasn’t worth it, that she didn’t know how to do this life as a single mom, that she was so scared…” Suddenly Sage stopped, thought through what she was saying and narrowed her eyes into it. “That’s the way I feel, the way I’ve felt.”

“We absorb emotions from our environment. That’s very common. Plus, we fear disconnection and we’ll do very unhealthy things to not feel that.”

“Or to stop feeling it.”

“What do you mean?”

Sage pulled her feet up under her and crossed her legs. “Well, I was just thinking about it, and it’s like we’re all trying to do things to make us stop feeling what we’re feeling. Mom feels alone and afraid. She tried to get Jason to fill that, and when that didn’t work, she started drinking to stop feeling it.”

The pastor angled his arms up into a triangle, putting his fingers to his mouth as he nodded.

“Jason was doing the same thing with his flings. I was doing it with parties and going out. Dad does it with work. Emily… well, she couldn’t deal with me, so she just sent me away, like ‘out of sight, out of mind.’ Nobody is dealing with any of this. It’s like everyone is doing everything they can think of to not feel, to pretend everything’s all right when we all know it’s not.”

He kept nodding. “And what about you?”

She laughed. “Oh, I tried. Believe me I tried. I don’t know if you’ve been around Luke much, but beating around the bush is not his forte. He kind of confronts things with a sledgehammer and ax.”

Pastor Steve joined her laugh. “Yeah, I’ve kind of noticed that.”

“And he doesn’t give up either.” Her gaze fell to her lap. “At least he hasn’t given up on me, and that was a tall order.” She let herself think the thought that seemed more overwhelming than any other she’d ever had. “I wish I could do that for them—my family. Not give up like Luke did with me, but I don’t think it’s working.”

“I think you might be surprised about that. I think your dad is a lot closer to your side of the fence than you think.”

“But he can’t. Emily won’t let him.”

The pastor shifted just slightly. “Do you know the term unconditional love?”

Thinking it through, Sage bobbed her head. “Yeah, like loving no matter what?”

“Right. It’s not something we can do without God’s help, but with God’s help, it can change our world in really dramatic ways. You know that. It’s what’s changed yours.”

“Luke.”

“Right. What has he done with you that’s truly unconditional love?”

She lifted her eyebrows. “Well, he doesn’t let me get away with acting like I’m not hurting. Like today. He knew things weren’t good, and he showed up and just held me. That didn’t fix anything, not like we think of, but it told me he was here.

“And he challenges me to be me whether anyone else would think that was a good thing or not. Like the end tables we did for you guys or the rooms we painted for his mom. When I’m with Luke, I feel free to be creative and imagine the world as it could be.”

The good pastor smiled. “You even look different when you talk about who you are with him.”

“I know.” Her eyes came down to his in amazement. “I think that’s what unconditional love has done. When I feel it, when it’s like all wrapped around me, I stop being so afraid. I feel like I can take on anything and do something to really make a difference. It makes me feel worth it and… powerful.” She shook her head. “That’s a bad word.”

“Why?”

“Because, powerful means you step on other people to get what you want.”

“No. Powerful means you are able to effect change in your world. That’s not a bad thing.”

“Okay, so powerful. It makes me feel powerful. And it makes me feel open and like I want to give it to other people. I’m not all cowering in the corner, hoping no one notices the mask is about to crack at any moment.” She laughed. “Tsh. I’m not even wearing a mask. I’m just me. Good, bad, whatever.”

“You’re happy.”

She grinned. “I’m happy. But it’s more than that. I’m peaceful. I’m at peace. I’m not running after something I know I’ll never catch. I’m okay with who I am and how I am. No need to try to figure out who other people want me to be. And I can be honest.” Leaning her head back, she exhaled. “I can be so honest, and I don’t have to worry about him being mad or hurt or whatever. I just know whatever it is, he’s going to be right there to help me and to work it out with me and to get through it… together.”

The pastor’s eyes had softened into smiles. “It’s the same way God is with us. He’s not out to find a reason to pitch us into hell. He loves us with unconditional love that does all those things you just described and so much more. His love changes us. It changes the way we see ourselves. It challenges us to become our best selves, but it also helps us do that.”

Strangely, she understood exactly what he meant. “I know. That’s what I feel like in church when you’re talking about Him. I guess I’ve just never thought of Him like that, like I can talk to Him and stuff.”

“He’s right here, and He wants you to talk to Him about the stuff that’s going on, to let Him love you through all the gyrations of life. Up, down, spinning, stopped, whatever. The more you hook into that and believe in His love for you, the more able you’ll be to walk through this stuff, even in the storms.”

“Because He’s always going to be right there to give me a hug and just love me no matter what.” Her eyes both clouded and came open to the wonderful new possibility. “You know, I’ve been praying for my family.” The admission both scared her and yanked her back. Why had she even said that?

“Oh, yeah? And what’s God saying?”

That stopped her. “No. I mean, I’ve been telling God about them.”

“I know. What’s He saying?”

Sage quirked her head. “Um, I don’t know. I guess I haven’t really been listening.”

He nodded and stood, putting the chair back. “Maybe it’s time to start.”

Chapter 37

For the next two days Sage listened for God, to God. Most of the time she was convinced He wasn’t talking, other times she was convinced she was making up the stuff she was hearing. However, she had helped Jane with the meals and the dishes rather than sulking in her room. She had even decided to take a walk on Saturday, and it felt good to get out of the house.

At the grocery store, she said hello to Mrs. Thompson who still looked at her like she had fallen out of the treehouse and smacked her head too hard, but she was cordial enough and even half-smiled at her this time.

It was on her way back that she found the pastor wrangling the old refrigerator out of the community hall doors, and she ran over to help. “Here, Pastor. Let me hold that for you.”

“Oh, thanks.”

With the door now staying open, he tipped the dolly up and angled it out through the door.

“Aw. Did it go to refrigerator heaven?” Sage asked, the sunshine making her a little more bubbly than normal.

“I’m afraid so. I was hoping one of the men could fix it, but I think we’ve got to face facts. It’s done.”

Together with the refrigerator, they started across the parking lot. “The new one is good though, right?”

“Oh, it’s not new, and it’s not even ours. Mac Parnell is letting us use it until we can get another one.” At the edge of the road where she had followed him to, he suddenly stopped.

Sage stopped with him, confused as to where they were going and why they had stopped. She looked one way down the street with no traffic and then the other way, shielding her eyes from the blinding sun. “So we’re just putting it out here for the refrigerator fairies to pick up?”

He laughed. “No. The guys from the Greely food bank are coming. They can use it to store food even if it doesn’t work for cold stuff.”

“Oh.” She lifted her head and nodded. “Is that where the dead refrigerators go? To the Greely food bank?”

“I don’t know about all of them, but that’s where this one is going.” He slapped the side of it just as a very large, old pickup came down the street. “Right on time.”

Stepping back because she knew she would be no help, Sage watched as they loaded the refrigerator and the pastor thanked the two men who had come for it. When they drove off, she followed the pastor back to the hall.

“So what’s the plan to get a new one?”

The pastor glanced back at her. “Plan?”

“Yeah. We can’t keep the one good Mr. Parnell is lending us forever, so that means we need a new one.”

At the door, the pastor tipped his head. “Well, unfortunately, we didn’t have money in the budget for one. I’m hoping maybe by November when some of the harvest donations start showing up…”

Sage twisted her mouth and put her hands on her hips. “Surely there’s a better plan than that.”

He laughed as he shrugged. “Sometimes you’ve got to just do what you can with what you’ve got and deal with it, make the best of things and all of that.”

Yes, and sometimes you do something and God fills in the pieces.

I need your help. Sage didn’t even think about how that would sound when she hit send, but the fact that Luke answered back in five seconds should have tipped her off to how panicked he was.

Are you okay? What’s wrong?

She laughed, not so much at him, but at how happy and light she felt. Not like that. I need help figuring out how to raise some money.

Money?

Yeah, you know, little green pieces of paper you trade for stuff?

I know what money is. Why?

Well, the pastor and I sent the refrigerator to its new home at the food bank. It was a very sad send-off, and it will be greatly missed, but now we are relying on the good graces of Mr. Parnell who lent us his.

You need money for a refrigerator?

Yes. Now how are we going to get it?

“I got everything you asked for.” Luke came banging his way into the Mitchell’s at four o’clock. “There’s more in the car.”

“I’m on it.” Sage headed out just as the pastor came out of his office.

“What’s all this?”

Luke raised three of the bags in his hands. “Sage’s idea. I’m just the messenger or the errand boy or something like that. Don’t ask me. When you’re around Sage, you never can quite tell what projects you’re going to get into.”

With no warning, she came in behind him, her arms loaded down with bags as well. “Hello. What are we standing around for? We’ve got cookies to bake.”

“Cookies?” Pastor Steve raised his eyebrows.

For a second, Sage’s light dimmed. “I know, I should have asked you, but I kind of wanted it to be a surprise.”

“Well, that worked. Why, may I ask are we baking cookies for what looks like a whole army?”

“Bake sale.” How she could look so excited, Luke had no accounting for; however, he was immensely enjoying watching the pastor try to keep up with her. When she got like this, no one could.

“A bake sale?”

She reached back and closed the door. “Yeah, we used to have them a lot when I was little. ‘Course I can’t make cakes and things like they did, but surely cookies can’t be too hard, right?”

“And where are we having this bake sale?”

With a shrug, she tipped her head. “I don’t know. The street? Oh, did you get the lemonade too?”

“Okay. Hold on.” Putting up his hands, the pastor waved them. “Let me get this straight. You’re going to set up a lemonade and cookie stand on the street… why?”

Sage shrugged. “To pay for the new refrigerator of course.” Then she pushed past them. “Come on, Luke. These eggs are going to go bad if we stand here yip-yapping all day.”

The second she was by, Luke looked at the pastor and raised his eyebrows. “I’m not asking.”

“How hard can this be, right?” Sage held up the little recipe on the side of the bag of chocolate morsels. “You did get everything, right?”

“Three of everything. Just like you said.”

“Good. Okay. We’re going to need flour…”

An hour later, with flour all over Jane’s kitchen and them, the batches of cookies started coming out of the oven.

“These are cool enough,” Sage said, waving her hand over the second pan to come out. “Why don’t you find something we can put them in?”

“Will this work?” He held up a plastic bowl.

“It’ll have to.” Sage went to work carefully but efficiently transferring the cookies.

The front door banged closed, and there were voices in the hallway. They didn’t have time, however, to worry about that. If they didn’t hurry, they were going to miss five o’clock traffic.

“I… wow.” Jane stopped at the little entrance. “Um…”

“We’ll clean it up. I promise,” Sage said. “Do you have the lemonade and the cups?”

“All ready,” Luke said.

“Awesome. You grab those, and I’ll get these.” She picked up the plastic bowl and the little hand-made sign. “We’ll be out front,” she said to Jane as they went past her. “Oh, and don’t worry about the cookies. I’ll be back to take them out.”

With both eyebrows up, Jane stood there and watched them depart.

The truth was Sage didn’t make it back in for more cookies. Somehow, word had gotten out that there were cookies and lemonade on the corner, and they got so busy, she completely forgot until Jane came out to replenish their stock.

Cars came. People walked over to see what was going on, and one glass and one cookie at a time, they spent the next three hours collecting money for the new refrigerator.

“You know my kitchen is never going to be the same,” Jane said although it was clear she wasn’t mad.

“We’re going to clean it up,” Sage said as they folded up shop just as the sun went down. “Luke said he’d wash all the dishes.”

“Oh, Luke said, did he?” He picked up the bowl and the bucket of donations. “As I recall, this was Sage’s idea.”

“I cooked, you clean.”

“You cooked? I cooked.” They headed back inside. “I’ll have you know those cookies were edible because of me.”

“Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Just keep telling yourself that.”

Up and into the house they went with Jane tagging along behind them.

“How’d cookie sales go?” Pastor Steve asked, coming out of his office.

Sage glanced back at Luke. “We got donations. I think we even did pretty good. Course we’ll have to pay Luke back for the groceries.”

“Nope Grandma paid me for the dresser. I got it covered.”

Together they all went to the kitchen, but Sage stopped short when she turned the corner. “Wow.”

“Uh-huh,” he said, stopping behind her and turning to the Mitchells. “Don’t come any closer. Save yourselves.”

“He’s not lying,” Sage said from in front of him. “No. The boy is not lying.”

Pan by pan, they washed until every cooking utensil and item in the entire kitchen was cleaned. Luke stood at the sink, wiping it down from all the water that had mysteriously migrated from the sink onto his clothes. “Remind me to say no next time you get a hair-brained idea like this.”

“You are such a wimp.” Sage wiped off the table of the last of the crumbs. “What? You afraid of a little water and a few cookies?” Coming alongside him, she bumped her hip into his. “Besides it was for a good cause. For your good cause I might add.” She flipped her rag over his wiping and dusted it out. “So tomorrow? Same time, same place.”

“Are you kidding me, woman? I am about cookied out.”

“How much you think we made?”

“Hard telling. I saw a couple guys flip more than a few bucks in, so maybe we made a good amount.”

She sighed as she leaned on the sink next to him. “I hope so. It sure would be nice to get a good fridge for over there.”

“Well, whatever we made, it was more than we had before.” Reaching over, he tweaked her nose and then kissed her for good measure. With a step back he surveyed the once again clean kitchen. “I’m thinking sandwiches.”

“Ugh.” Sage put her head all the way back. “Can’t we just skip eating tonight?”

“Well, maybe you can, but I’m betting the Mitchells are going to want something.”

“Maybe if we don’t say anything, they won’t notice.”

Leaving his hand so it trailed across her midsection, Luke crossed past her to the refrigerator. He perused their choices. “Okay. Here’s pickles and mayo and…”

He was right. They needed to eat. That’s what her brain kept saying, and somehow she got her feet and body to move. Bed was going to feel really good tonight.

“How much?” Sage asked nervously as Luke carefully counted out the money later. He had it all laid out on the floor in little stacks. Dimes, quarters, nickels—they all had their own little area.

“And carry the three,” he said, pouring over the math. “One hundred and twenty-three dollars and seventy-five cents.”

That completely deflated Sage. “That’s all?”

“Hey, that’s one hundred and twenty-three more than we had this morning.”

Swinging her leg around to start putting it all back in the bucket, she sighed. “Yeah, but a good fridge is going to cost like ten times that.”

Luke looked over at her. “So, who’s up for another bake sale?”

Pastor Steve had been thrilled with the amount although Sage couldn’t tell how much of that was an act. As she walked Luke out to his car later, she put her arms around him and breathed in the scent that was him. She loved everything about him. How he held her, his sense of humor, his easy way, his ability to pull off even her craziest scheme. “Thank you,” she whispered into the softness of the night air.

“Anytime.”

Luke caught sight of her the second he made it in the door of the church Sunday morning. It would be hard to miss her in the white palazzo pants and ice blue silk top. He remembered the pants from the week before, and that brought a smile to his heart.

“Hey, there,” she said at her place next to Jane at the fireplace, “you ushering?”

He lifted the edge of his gray jacket to reveal the plaid blue of his shirt. “As usual.”

“Hi, Luke,” Jane said, and he waved at her.

“So, afterward,” Sage continued, “are we doing anything? I was thinking maybe we could get started on those Christmas presents.”

“I think we’re going to Grandma’s, but I’ll have to ask Mom.”

“Oh. Yeah. Of course.”

“By we, that means you too.”

She smiled. “Count me in.”

“Sage!”

They both turned, and Sage bent to hug Ryder.

“Guess what?” he said as if he knew the password to a bank account in Switzerland.

“What?” she asked just as excited.

“Billy and I built a treehouse yesterday all by ourselves. You should see it. It’s awesome.”

Watching the two of them together, Luke sent up yet another prayer that God was working things out even if there was no outward evidence of that. The two of them deserved the chance to get to know each other. When his gaze traced from them up, he found Jaycee looking at him, and the expression on her face both worried and puzzled him. She looked almost apologetic. But that couldn’t be. This was Jaycee. Wonder Woman and Super Girl all tied up together. She didn’t show emotion like that. No, she would rather eat nails and spit them out for breakfast. Then again, it was hard to argue with what was in her eyes.

He ran his hand over Sage’s back and nodded as if he was going into the church, which he would. “See you afterward.”

She waved and then turned back for Ryder, choosing finally to sit on the small hearth because Ryder’s story was clearly not short.

“Hey,” Luke said when he made it to Jaycee, and after a second Jaycee lifted her eyes and the edge of her glasses.

“Hey.”

He tipped his head. “You okay?”

She let out a long breath and then dragged her gaze up to his. “Do you hate me?”

Luke felt the words like a punch, and he stepped back and put his hands on his belt. “Hate? Nah. I could never hate you.”

Jaycee’s glance traced over to Sage and Ryder. “You sure about that?”

“Yeah.” Knowing everyone would surely see but not really caring, he pulled her into a hug. “Everybody’s entitled to one mistake.”

“I’ve made more than one.”

“So have we all.”

Sage saw the hug. It would have been hard to miss. However, she more than anyone knew Luke’s big heart, and she could hardly expect him to drop Jaycee. In fact, as she thought about it, she would expect no less from him.

However, when he headed into the church, she hadn’t realized her eyes hadn’t moved from the scene until her sister’s gaze turned and found her looking. Quickly Sage dropped hers to focus on Ryder. “I’m going to have to come see it sometime.”

“How about today?”

“Oh.” She hated this, hated breaking his little heart. “Probably not, but we’ll see.”

“Hey.”

Sage’s heart jumped into her throat, and she had to blink to keep her eyes in check. Slowly she looked over and then up, and it took a prayer to get her to her feet. “Hey.”

Breathing became a real issue as she stood only a couple of feet from her sister, and it wasn’t until she realized that Ryder had taken her hand that her senses began to register that this was really happening. Sage brushed her hair back from her face. “I’m sorry. Did you need something?”

Jaycee lifted her chin and then half-smiled. “Ryder. I came to get Ryder. It’s time to go in.”

And then Sage glanced across the lobby to their parents, standing at the bottom of the steps waiting for their children to join them. “Oh. Of… course.” She pushed Ryder gently. “It’s time for you to go, Bud. We’ll talk afterward.”

He didn’t let go for the first three steps, and when he turned to look at her, there was pain in his sad little eyes.

“It’s okay,” she said softly, and she got herself to smile.

When they walked off, she put her head down and let out a breath just as Jane put her arm around her. Sage looked up at her but only got one side of her mouth to come up. She was pretty sure she would never get used to how badly this hurt.

Luke sat in the back, praying for her. He wasn’t at all sure why things had to be so tough. Couldn’t her parents see what they were doing to her? Why couldn’t the people who were supposed to love her the most see they were killing her like this?

Between them sat the Lawrences, and it was physically difficult not to feel the hate every time he looked at them. Time and again his eyes would go there, and his heart would begin the long list of grievances against them. It was almost disconcerting how easy it was to make that list against people he had once considered family. Shaking his head, he closed his eyes to try to stop the thoughts, but even in the darkness, they were there. “God, I can’t do this,” he whispered. “I can’t forgive them. They don’t deserve it. Not after how they’ve treated Sage.”

He put his head down, and it took a long breath to get it to come back up again. “And they just sit there, smack dab in the middle of everyone as if their hearts aren’t black with the sins they have committed against her.” His gaze slipped past them and onto her, and this shake of his head was hard and pain-filled. “She doesn’t deserve this, God. You’ve got to know that. You’ve got to see it. Please do something so she’s not being shredded by them, so she can maybe find some peace and a place to belong with people who really love her.”

Sadie Ellis stepped up to the podium and smoothed out the book. She took in the first words and then looked up. “A Reading from St. Paul to the Colossians. Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.” Her soft, Southern lilt wafted under the words. “Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.”

“Lord,” Luke breathed the short laugh, “seriously, this ain’t funny, and You know it.”

“And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.

Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. Let the message of Christ dwell among you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom through psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit, singing to God with gratitude in your hearts. And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.”

By the time she was finished, Luke was hunched over in abject discouragement. How could God expect him to forgive them? What did He want, all of them to hug and sing Kumbaya around a campfire? Jaycee? Yes. Maybe he could forgive her for some of it, but Sage’s parents? No way. No how. That was simply a bridge too far. Of that much Luke was one-hundred percent convinced.

The pastor stepped up then, and it took everything in Luke not to glare his displeasure at the man’s choice for the readings. Of all people, the pastor had to know that was patently unfair to do to her sitting right there in front. In fact, he might just have to tell him that himself after the service. So with arms wrapped like an anaconda in front of him, Luke listened to the Gospel but heard none of it. When it was over, he dug in, trench like, for the battle against all the niceties of being a Christian he was sure were fixing to start pouring out of the good pastor, whom he also hated at the moment. After all, how were you supposed to live something that was completely impossible while simultaneously feeling guilty because you never could get it all right? That was a circle that would never be squared in his mind. Ever.

“This morning, God issued me a challenge,” Pastor Steve said as he gripped the podium, “and if you were listening, He just issued you one as well. Oh, yes, the reading sounded completely wonderful.” He let go of the podium and took a step back. “‘Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.’ Hear that? It sounds great, right? We’re Christians, so of course we’re supposed to be all of these things—compassionate, kind, humble, holy. In fact, these are the very things that non-Christians love to point out that we fail at… repeatedly.

“Over and over again, we, as Christians, fail to be compassionate. We are not always kind or patient. We yell at our children, get frustrated with bills, gossip, and tear each other down. Right? Or am I the only one? Yes, we are sinners saved by grace, but doesn’t it frustrate anybody else how truly sinful our lives look sometimes? Is it any wonder that non-Christians call us hypocrites and want nothing to do with the church or God? After all, you can go off and do the stuff we do to ourselves and to each other and without the label ‘Christian,’ at least we’re not hypocrites too.

“But then as if that wasn’t bad enough, St. Paul has to add this little zinger:  ‘Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.’ Forgive. Oh, that’s a nice word.” Sarcasm dripped from the edges of the statement, and Luke had to at least give the pastor credit for being honest.

“Right? It’s a nice word. Forgiveness. It is. Until we are called to do it. Then, I don’t know about you, but I think if I looked up the word ‘forgiveness’ in the dictionary, the synonyms for it would be things like ‘impossible,’ ‘unbearable,’ ‘unachievable,’ and yes, sometimes even ‘excruciating.’ Because the truth is, when I am really hurt and hurting, forgiveness is the last thing I want someone to bring up.” He tilted his head and used a cute little voice. “But you’re a Christian, Pastor Steve, you’re supposed to forgive.” He snapped back into pastor mode. “Right? And we get trapped in that, don’t we? We get trapped in what we’re supposed to do? I’m supposed to be loving, so I put on a loving face and hope nobody notices what’s really in my heart. I’m supposed to be joyful, so I sing and serve when the real truth maybe is I’m sick of all of it and all I want to do is quit because I’m sick of the mask. I’m sick of trying to make everyone think I’m Christian when in my heart, I know I’m carrying anger and hurt and resentment and a whole bunch of weariness and anger at God because He’s not making any of this stuff go away.

“And I think no other word encapsulates the challenge of the Gospel, the challenge of being a Christian, like the word forgive does. It just feels undoable. But then…” He stopped and held up one finger. “St. Paul in his infinite and annoying ability to cut right to the quick of the challenge takes that impossible challenge one step further. See, listen to this: ‘And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.’ Love.” The pastor let out a breath. “You see, he is not just calling us, challenging us to the impossibility of forgiving those who hurt us, but then he trumps even that by saying we are called to love them.

“Say what? I can’t love them. I can’t even forgive them for what they did. Are you kidding me? I’m supposed to love them. That is insane. That is… not going to happen. That’s impossible.”

Luke almost laughed because it seemed the preacher was having the same conversation with God that he was.

“Oh, and then, it gets better,” Pastor Steve continued, “here listen to this one: ‘Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful.’ Okay, I don’t know about you, but by the time I got to that verse, I was ready to give up completely. I even told the Lord, ‘Nope. Not possible. Can’t do it. I can’t. I don’t have it in me to be at peace, and to be thankful for those who have hurt me. I don’t.’ And do you know what God said?” He laughed and ran his thumb down the side of his nose. “As I live and breathe, God said to me, ‘You’re right, Steve. You don’t. On your own, you cannot forgive them, not for real, not like I’m asking you to. On your own, you cannot love them. On your own, you are trapped because you know it’s the right thing to do, but you can’t do it. And that’s right where Satan wants you.

“Satan wants nothing more than for you to read that reading and realize the enormity of what I’m asking you to do. My standard is impossible. It’s like Peter in the Gospel. Peter was a fisherman. The Bible doesn’t tell us if he was successful or not, just that he was. And the night Jesus was arrested and condemned, Peter, who said he would never abandon Jesus, did just that. He denied he even knew Jesus, and then he ran. So here we are, flash forward to the Gospel today. Jesus has arisen and the Apostles have seen Him alive, and what does Peter do?”

“Goes fishing,” someone said, and the pastor nodded.

“That’s right. Peter goes fishing. Jesus Christ has arisen from the dead, and Peter, the rock, the leader, decides to go fishing. Why?” Pastor Steve shook his head. “Because just like me, Peter knew. He knew what was really in his heart, and he couldn’t pretend anymore. He couldn’t act like everything was great, because he knew in his heart it wasn’t. On the night Jesus was condemned, Peter’s true heart was revealed to him and to Jesus, and he knew it. So, he did what we all do… he gave up. He basically said, ‘I can’t do this. I can’t be this perfect person Jesus wants me to be or thought I was, so I’m out of here.’ And he went back to how things always were before Jesus showed up. He couldn’t face Jesus after what He had done. Here was Peter, the guy who got that Jesus was the Son of God. He got it right. But then he got it so, so wrong, and he knew after that, there was no hope for him.

“And then.” Pastor Steve smiled as if he was about to start crying. “What does Jesus do?”

“He goes fishing too.”

“That’s right. He goes fishing too—not for a meal, but for Peter. He tells Peter and the others to cast their nets over to the other side of the boat, and they haul in all of these fish, so many they can’t even get them all into the boat. And when John recognizes Jesus, it’s Peter who jumps out of the boat to run to Him. Did you catch that? What did Peter do? After he had done all of this stuff wrong, he finally did the one thing that made all the difference. He got out of the boat of himself and he ran to Jesus.

“You see, we might be Christians, but we’re human first. Just like Peter, we’re going to get it wrong. We’re going to get into situations that doing the Christian thing is going to be harder than anything we’ve ever been called to do, and at that point, it is not about putting on a nice face or doing it because we’re supposed to… it’s about running to Him, to Jesus, and asking Him to do for us what we could never do ourselves.

“And then, I love this part: ‘as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved.’ Holy. Not because of us, but because of Him. We are holy even as God is holy not because we’re trying to be but because of Him, because of what Jesus Christ did for us, yes, but moreover because of Who He is to us right now in this moment. We are not Christians because we get everything right. We are Christians because when we don’t get something right, when something is just too hard to do, we know where we can go with that, Who we can go to. And He Who is perfectly holy will impart His holiness into our lives as we trust in Him to be the perfection and the love He is calling us to.

“That’s why this reading is like a personal challenge to me. When I look at things in life and hear myself saying, ‘Well, that sounds nice and all God, but…’ what I now see is that is a window into my own heart, and sometimes I’m like Peter. I don’t much like what I see there. But it is a point that I most need God to step in and give me His grace and His mercy and His love, to heal me of my unholiness in that place. It is the point at which I need to get out of the boat of myself and run to where Jesus is. It is the point at which I truly become a Christian, not out of my own strength but out of the acknowledgement of my weakness. And over all of these things, holiness, compassion, kindness, and forgiveness, I ask You, my Lord and my Savior, to put on love which perfects all in unity. Amen.”

Luke could hardly believe his own whispered, “Amen.”

As he stood with the others, his mind whipsawed through the emotions and debate scrolling across his mind and heart. Look at your heart, God whispered, not at their sin. You are not to judge, only to love. He had to breathe that down. How much easier it would be to judge, to tear down, to condemn. How much he wanted to do just that. Look at your own heart…

And when he did, he knew as God had, that he needed as much forgiveness for his hardened heart as whatever sins they had committed. Maybe they weren’t hitting the target, but neither was he. Maybe they weren’t perfect, but his self-righteousness and judgments weren’t helping or healing anyone either. “Okay, God,” he finally whispered in his heart as he stood to gather the collection. “I’m giving it to You, all of it. The pastor’s right, I can’t forgive them on my own. I can’t. I need You, and I’m asking You to help me.”

At the front, he passed the plate around the choir and then turned to start up the aisle. In the very first pew, he met up with his first challenge. Her soft, sad smile brushed his heart. God, be with Sage, protect her from all evil. A row and another, and then his gaze locked for one second on that of Mr. Lawrence, and he saw the apology go through the older man’s eyes. Apparently he hadn’t been the only one listening to Pastor Steve.

Taking the basket to the next row, he breathed in the lesson and shook his head. What good is it to call yourself a Christian without Christ in the middle of it? The words from some long-forgotten youth group meeting with Mrs. Mitchell floated through him, and he smiled. At the thought of the tea cups, Luke almost laughed out loud. He’d never heard God speak quite so clearly before. His gaze swept across those sitting there, and he saw them with new eyes. No. They weren’t perfect. None of them were. But they were here, and they were trying, and maybe, just maybe it was time to stop sorting them into worthy and unworthy, and just give them all grace.

It was only when he picked up the basket the last time and looked down at it that the odd appearance of the things in there struck him. For one thing, the basket was fuller than normal, and there were little envelopes of various colors mixed in among the normal offerings of bills and checks. Not having time to work on understanding that, he went over to Trent and dumped his two baskets with the others before going back to his seat.

He wasn’t sure if the pastor had meant to ignite a firestorm inside of him or not, but that was the result. When he looked up at the Lawrences, it was now through a prism that hadn’t been there before. Carefully kneeling because he so needed to, he bent his head. “God, please help me. Please…”

Chapter 38

When the service blessedly ended, Luke stood at the back handing out bulletins. He felt like he’d survived a tornado rain-wrapped in a hurricane, and it was completely unclear to him if the experience had changed anything at all. As he watched Mrs. Lawrence and Jaycee coming toward him, he thought his blood pressure might peg out. How could he face them? What would he say? Should he say anything? Oh, God, please do this because I can’t.

“Good morning, Luke,” Mrs. Lawrence said with a smile.

“Morning.” He nodded. “Bulletin?”

“Sure. How’s your mom?”

“Oh.” Surprise pounced on him. “She’s good. I’m sure she’s down there.” He bobbed his head toward the lobby.

“Great. I’m going to have to catch up with her. We haven’t talked in a while.”

“I’m sure she would love that.”

And then she stepped past him, and Luke barely recovered from that before finding himself face to face with Jaycee.

She smiled, but hers was much more timid and contrite. “Are you going to your grandma’s afterward?”

“Uh. Yeah.” He handed a bulletin past her to Mr. Parnell.

A nod and her gaze fell from his. “Well, have fun.”

“O… kay. You too.” His gaze followed her past him and out the door even as he continued to hand out bulletins. One part of him said that should have been harder; one part said she should have said more and been more apologetic. Another part said that was just beyond weird. And all the parts agreed, this was the very definition of surreal.

It was clear as the crowd dwindled that Mrs. Mitchell and Sage had gone down one of the side aisles and out because he never actually saw them exit. However, as he stacked the remaining bulletins together, he glanced out into the lobby and there they were, right by the fireplace, greeting people and smiling as if they were meant to be nowhere else.

“Uh, Luke,” Trent said from the other side. “Can you go get the pastor?”

“Why? What’s wrong?”

“I don’t… well, look at this.”

Mrs. P had just wrapped Sage in a hug only she could give when Luke stepped up to them.

He and Pastor Steve ducked into a quiet conversation and then walked off, and Sage’s gaze went with them. That was odd. But she shook that off and smiled at the next person.

“Good morning.”

“No,” Trent said. “I don’t understand it either. We just picked up the collection. But see, they all say something like this. Refrigerator fund. Or For the refrigerator.”

“How many of them are there?” Pastor Steve asked, and for some unknown reason it looked as if he had no intention of touching them.

“I have no idea.” Trent ran his hand through the collection. “Fifty?”

Pastor Steve exhaled and nodded. “I think I’m going to go catch Mac. He’s on the finance council.”

“Okay.”

When the pastor left, Luke looked at Trent who scratched his thin beard.

“You know.” Trent reached in and picked up a check. “Some of these checks say the same thing on the bottom. There might be more than fifty.”

Hands on his beltline, Luke looked from the basket out to the lobby. She might not know it yet, but it was very likely that Sage was not going to have to make any more cookies.

Standing there in the lobby with Jane, Sage knew she was safe if she just stayed where she was, but when she saw her father glance at her from across the room, she couldn’t lie and tell herself she could just ignore him. Especially when the glance became a look which became an apologetic gaze.

Go, God whispered in the depths of her spirit, and she knew it was Him because she’d learned very well over the past couple of days what His voice sounded like, and for some unknown reason, it always asked the impossible of her.

“Okay, God,” she whispered because she was quaking in her cute white boots, “if we’re going to do this, then I’m going to need all the help I can get here. You know that, right?”

Go.

With a breath and lift of her chin, she started across the lobby; however, before she got halfway to her father, Mrs. Thompson stepped up to stop her.

“Miss Sage,” she said, sounding like Ms. P who was the only other person who called her that. Mrs. Thompson put her hand on Sage’s arm, which left no question of her intentions to talk with her. “Listen, I know, this is a little out of the ordinary, but well, Luke told me what the two of you were up to last night with the cookies and everything.”

That’s when Sage let go of her mission long enough to realize Mrs. Thompson was holding out a small piece of paper.

“Well, the truth is, I just think the world of Luke, and I know how much good he does for this community. But I also know he won’t take help from nobody.” She pressed the paper into Sage’s hand. “He said he was buying all of them groceries for your cookie sale ‘cause of that busted refrigerator, and well, I just don’t think the two of you should have to pay for all those groceries on your own. So here’s a little something…”

“Oh, Mrs. Thompson,” Sage started as she took a step backward.

“No, Dear, now don’t go telling me you can’t accept it. If nothing else, do something nice for Luke and we’ll call it our little secret. Okay?”

How could Sage say no to that? Do something nice for Luke. The request touched her heart. “Okay. I will.”

Mrs. Thompson squeezed her arm and ducked her head even further. “Be good to him, you hear me? He’s one of a kind.”

Sage nodded. “That he is.”

“I don’t know,” Pastor Steve said.

“There’s checks too,” Trent said, and he held one up. “See? Refrigerator donation.”

“Well, I’ll be,” Mac said. He considered and scratched his nose. “Well, we meet tomorrow night to count. Will that be soon enough, Pastor?”

With everything in him, Luke wanted to scream No. But he held his tongue. This was not his call.

“Uh, sure, Mac.” Pastor Steve nodded. “Tomorrow will be fine. We’ll put this all in the safe just like always and see what we’ve got.”

“Oh,” Luke said as if he’d just been jumpstarted. “I forgot. Sage and I had a cookie sale last night. We’ve got another hundred and twenty-three and some change to add to this.”

“Wow.” Mac shook his head. “Well, Pastor, maybe your miracle showed up after all.”

The pastor smiled. “Looks like it might have.”

And with that, they busted up and went back to life.

When Mrs. Thompson let her go, Sage looked up and the challenge had become far more fearsome than when she had last beheld it. There stood not only her father and her stepmother but now Luke’s parents as well.

“Oh, Lord,” she said maybe louder than she even realized, “I don’t think so. You can’t be serious.”

The split second before she turned to beat it away from them, none other than Mrs. Baker called out to her. “Oh, there she is. Sage! Sage!”

This was not going to be good. She let out a long, slow breath because if she didn’t, she would have totally run the other direction. When she got her gaze up, she forced a smile to her face. Wow. She might pass out if her lungs didn’t start cooperating. With a hard push, she got her feet moving in that direction, and only God and her willpower kept her moving.

Once there, she stepped into the full-on sunshine from the windows beyond.

“Sage,” her stepmother said, and there was so much fake there, she was surprised the others seemed unfazed by it. “Felicia tells me you redecorated some of the rooms at their house.”

“Oh. That.” Sage ducked in embarrassment. “It was mostly Luke.”

“Oh, come on now,” Felicia said, and she turned to Emily. “You should see the swirls Sage painted on the wall, and the bench they made. It’s amazing.”

“Amazing? Really?” Her stepmother sounded both confused and uncertain she had heard that correctly.

“It doesn’t surprise me,” her father said, putting his hand on her shoulder. He smiled at her, and Sage wanted to ask but she knew better.

“You should see it,” Felicia continued. “It’s so much better than the pink.” She leaned over to Emily. “Don’t tell John, but I’m thinking about letting them see what they can do with our bedroom next.”

John’s eyebrows shot for the ceiling. “What if I like our bedroom the way it is?”

She grinned at him. “Maybe you’ll like the new one even better.”

When Luke came out of the church, still trying to get his mind wrapped around all those envelopes and if he should say anything to her about them, it took him more than one glance to even locate her in the lobby. No one was by the fireplace. Mrs. Mitchell was over by the double doors speaking with a young couple with a baby. That was odd. Where was…?

And then just as he stepped down the first stair, he saw her and he very nearly forgot all about the rest of the stairs. She was talking to his parents… and hers!

It took a shake to get himself moving reliably again, and when he did, it was not without trepidation that he went over to see what was going on.

“The bench is just so perfect,” his mother was saying, and Luke looked at Sage and asked the question with his eyes.

Wide-eyed, she answered it and lifted her shoulders without moving them.

“There’s the superstar builder now.” His father put out his hand and shook it, which was odd. Then Mr. Lawrence did the same, which was even stranger.

Luke fought not to look behind him and above him. Surely there was a rabbit hole he had somehow fallen down.

“They did end tables for the Mitchells,” Mr. Lawrence said. “You should see them. Very fine work.”

“Well, where have you been hiding him?” Mrs. Lawrence asked. “Do you do drawers? I have a couple of drawers in my kitchen that just… ugh… will not cooperate.”

Surreal. Why did that word keep following him around this morning?

“Sage!” Ryder raced up, his friends now gone, and he went right to her and stood in the protectiveness of her body as she put her hands on his shoulders. “Can you come and see my birdhouse? Please. Please. Please! Please, can she, Dad?”

One small glance at his wife and Mr. Lawrence looked at her and almost smiled. “I don’t see why not. Are you two out and about today?” The question was directed at Luke.

“Oh.” He glanced at his mom. “I think we’re going over to Grandma’s, right?”

“Lunch won’t be until one,” his mother said, a strange glow in her eyes. “I think you have time for a little stop.”

“Oh.” That freaked him out more than he wanted to admit. “Okay. Well, then let’s go see that birdhouse, Ryder-My-Man.”

“Can I go with them?” Ryder asked his father. “Please. Please. Please.”

Mr. Lawrence laughed. “This is getting to be a pattern.” Then he shrugged. “Go on. We’ll be right behind you.”

“YAY! Come on, Sage. Let’s go!”

Luke caught her eye again as Ryder grabbed her hand and they headed for the door. She asked the question without voicing it. He raised his eyebrows at her in answer. He did notice Jaycee with one of her friends standing at the fireplace, and it took next to nothing at all to see the strange, confused look on her face. He couldn’t explain, and he wasn’t going to try.

Sage made a quick stop to tell Mrs. Mitchell their plans, and then all three of them stepped out into the hot, humidity of the North Carolina August.

The sunshine. Luke. Whatever it was, Sage felt like she was flying as they headed out to the Lawrence house. Crazy as it sounded, she could almost imagine going with the family out to the lake. Sage barely held back the grin when she thought about fishing. Of course, she would stay on the rocks and scream, “Eww” at everything, but she could so easily see Luke helping Ryder, and the laughter, even in her imagination it felt incredible.

“Guess what, Sage?” Ryder said from the back.

“What’s that?”

“I’m learning to do the butterfly. The coach says I’m a natural. He’s trying to get Mom to let me try out for the junior team in the Fall.”

“No kidding,” Sage said.

“That’s awesome,” Luke said, glancing into the rearview mirror, and Sage loved that. There seemed to be such a connection between the two, and that made her heart sing just a little happier.

“Do you think you can come for one of my meets, Sage?” Ryder asked, and Luke squeezed her hand, clearly knowing the tough spot that put her into.

“I’ll have to see, but I would love to be up in those bleachers cheering you on. Go, Ryder! Swim fast! Yay!”

Ryder sat up even straighter. “It’s going to be so awesome.”

Luke glanced over at her, and Sage gave him a forced smile. The unknowns were still so murky. She had no idea where she would even be in two weeks, much less in a month or more. In that moment she hoped that she would, in fact, get to see her brother stand on a podium and raise his medal someday. Nothing would make her happier.

When they got to the house, Luke let Ryder out and went around to open her door. Getting out, Sage had to check her panic. This house seemed to do that to her without even trying.

“It’s in the backyard.” Ryder took off that direction, leaving them standing together at the car.

“I hate lying to him,” Sage said, brushing the hair from her eyes.

Luke picked his head up higher and looked down at her. “Who says it was a lie? God’s not finished with this story yet.”

That brought a sad smile to her face. He could be so positive even in the face of what she saw as complete hopelessness.

“Nooo!” The scream yanked both of their gazes that direction, and with only that, they took off.

Luke got there first, but Sage was only steps behind, and as she came up, the magnitude of the tragedy became undeniable.

Ryder sat under the tree, the small boards in a heap at his feet. Slowly he picked one up. “It’s ruined.” Devastation screamed through Ryder’s voice. “It’s wrecked!” He pitched the boards onto the ground, and Sage’s heart fell with them.

At that second Ryder turned to run for the house, but Luke arrested his flight.

“Hey. Hold up there, bud.” With a glance at her, he transferred the child’s care to Sage, and she took hold of the little shoulders.

“It’s trashed,” Ryder lamented, head down as he kicked at the grass.

“No, now hang on there,” Sage said, bending down to him. “Maybe not.”

“What do you mean? Look at it. It’s wrecked.”

But Sage knew the look on Luke’s face, so she held onto Ryder. “Just wait a second.”

Luke turned though he was sitting on his heels, spinning so his feet twisted at a weird angle. He held up two of the broken pieces. “Did you just use glue on this?”

“Yeah. We didn’t have any nails.”

Picking up three more pieces, Luke stood. “Tell you what, hand me some more of it. I think we can fix it at my shop.”

Ryder’s eyes went wide. “Really?”

“Eep!” Sage squealed and clapped her hands. “I told you. Come on.” She gathered up some of the little pieces of wood and stacked them on Luke’s outstretched arms and then she gave some to Ryder. When she looked at Luke, she couldn’t deny the happiness. He was amazing.

“Ah, what happened to it?” Jaycee asked, coming up from behind them, and Sage spun as if she was about to be shot.

“The wind wrecked my birdhouse, but Luke’s gonna fix it,” Ryder said.

Jaycee wound her arms at her middle. “Don’t you think you should change first?”

“Ugh. But…”

“Go change,” Luke said. “We’ll put this in the car and wait for you.”

“Don’t leave.” With that, Ryder took off.

“Ryde!” Sage called, and he laughed and came back to hand her the pieces he was holding.

“I’ll be back!” And he ran to the house.

Tension and awkwardness descended into the shade, dancing between them. Jaycee put her gaze down as her toe drifted back and forth on the ground.

Not knowing what else to do, Sage glanced over at Luke. “I guess we’d better get this in the car.”

“Yeah.” He took a step to follow Sage past Jaycee. However, two more, and Jaycee turned.

“Sage?” she said as if she thought she might be killed for it.

In surprise Sage turned back. “Did we forget something?” She looked on the ground but saw nothing.

“Uh, no.” Jaycee shook her hair back as she looked at her sister. “I wanted to say thank you for the other night.” With one finger, she wound the hair back out of her eyes. “Um, and I’m sorry… about everything.”

“Oh.” The surprise dragged Sage’s gaze from Jaycee up to Luke mostly because she needed affirmation that he had heard that too. “Um, well, you’re welcome, and yeah… I’m sorry too.”

Jaycee’s gaze came up. “I should’ve given you a chance.”

“No. I was way too stuck-up. I’m sure I had it coming.”

“No, you weren’t. I was just so jealous of you I couldn’t see straight.”

“Jealous? Why? You’ve got such a great life here. All your friends…”

“I’m so sorry. I was so mad at you, I never even thought what coming here must’ve been like for you.”

“I never thought what coming would be like for you either. I mean, ‘Hello sister you hardly remember.’” Sage’s heart softened more than it had since she’d stepped through that door the first day. “I mean, what were you supposed to do, right?”

“Well, I could’ve been a little less schizo that’s for sure.”

“Hey!” Ryder called from the side of the house. “What happened to my birdhouse? Aren’t you guys coming?”

Luke laughed even as he took in the awkward-but-getting-better reunion. “We’re right here.”

Sage tipped her head. “We’ve got to go do some emergency surgery on Ryder’s project.” Then a crazy thought attacked her. “You want to come along?”

Instantly Jaycee looked up at Luke and shrank back. “Oh. I’m sure y’all don’t want me hanging around.”

“Sure we do,” Luke said easily, and Sage smiled. “Besides, I need someone to hold the nails.”

Jaycee’s face corkscrewed into concern. “Gee, thanks.”

They let Jaycee explain to their parents where they were going as Luke and Sage put the birdhouse pieces into the car. In no time the four of them were on the road to Luke’s, and Sage suddenly wasn’t at all sure how to be around him. Could she hold his hand? Should she? What was the protocol in this situation? She had no earthly idea.

Dating was one thing. Dating with siblings right there was another matter altogether.

At Luke’s, he called his mom to let her know, and then he let them all into the workshop. In her white pants, Sage was super careful not to touch anything. They went through and to the back where Luke turned on the little light.

“Okay,” he said, laying the pieces out on the bench, “Ryder, you’re going to have to show me how this goes.”

Ryder came forward, looking very much like a surgeon on a tough case. “This was the roof. And this part was the front where they could get in.”

The two of them went to work on the puzzle as Sage and Jaycee watched. After only a few minutes, Sage looked over at her sister, who looked back, and Sage smiled. Remarkably Jaycee smiled back, and it almost even looked real.

It was two o’clock before they got the thing back together. There was no telling how many nails they had put in it, and it was glued within an inch of its life. If the wind tried to take it apart again, the wind would surely lose that battle.

“You know,” Sage said. “I think we should get some paint. We could do it in yellow and pink. This part right here…”

“Pink?” Ryder stepped back as if he’d been shot. “This is a boy birdhouse. Not a girl birdhouse.”

“What? You’re not going to let the little girl birds in it?” Sage asked. “What about when it rains? You’re going to leave them outside?”

“I call discrimination,” Jaycee said, coming shoulder-to-shoulder with her sister.

Ryder stepped back to Luke and angled his mouth as if only Luke could hear him. “I don’t know what that is, but it doesn’t sound good.”

Luke laughed. “Tell me about it.” He stepped over to a small pile of wood in the corner. “Tell you what, why don’t we put together a girl birdhouse? We can put it over on the other tree, and they won’t know the real action is across the way.”

“Great idea!” Ryder said. “I think the boy birdhouse should have a big screen TV and some nice chairs. The girl birdhouse can just have some dumb ol’ dolls.”

“Dolls?” Jaycee asked in horror. “How about a basketball goal?”

“And paints,” Sage said, coming forward, “don’t forget those.”

The two guys exchanged a look and shook their heads.

“We could do it in pink and green,” Sage said.

“And purple,” Jaycee added. “Don’t forget the purple.”

“Pink, green, and purple?” Luke asked, shaking his head. “Wow.”

The second birdhouse didn’t take nearly as long to put together because Luke used only a few pieces, one for each wall, one for the floor and two for the roof. It was together in no time.

“Now we just have to paint it,” Jaycee said in triumph as she picked it up.

However, Sage looked down at herself. “I think you’re going to have to do that. I’m not exactly dressed for painting today.”

Pulling the project down to her hip like a basketball, Jaycee surveyed her sister. “Well, maybe you can come tomorrow and we can paint it.”

Sage could hardly believe her ears. “Really?”

“Sure. But I ain’t touching the pink.” Jaycee half-grinned at her.

“Pink,” Ryder said. “Yeach.”

“High five on that one, buddy.” Luke lifted his hand, and Ryder slapped it. Then Luke looked at his watch. “As much as I hate to, we better get. I told Mom we’d be there by now.”

“Oh. Right!” Sage panicked in one second. “We should go.”

“You can just drop us off,” Jaycee said, leading the way out, still carrying her birdhouse.

“Thanks, Luke,” Ryder said when he got out of the car, holding his pieced-back-together birdhouse. It was a small miracle they’d rescued all of it.

“You got it, dude.” Luke held out his fist, and Ryder bumped it.

“Seriously,” Jaycee said to Sage. “Come tomorrow. I’ve got basketball in the morning, but around one I’m free.”

“Uh. Okay,” Sage said from inside the car, and Luke could hear her uncertainty. He didn’t blame her. He was having a hard time processing this new version of Jaycee as well.

She got out of the car and stood there, right in front of him, for two seconds. “Take care.” Reaching out, she put her hand on his arm. “And behave yourself with my sister, or you’ll have me to answer to.”

That slammed into him, and it took a minute to get anything out. “Oh. Uh. Yeah. Got it. No problem.”

Then Jaycee bent down to wave at Sage. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“K.” Sage waved back, and Luke got back in.

When the door closed, he looked over at her with raised eyebrows. “What was that?”

Her eyes were wide with surprise. “You tell me. Did she fall out of the tree with the birdhouse?”

“I was wondering the same thing.” He put the car into drive and extracted them from the driveway. “You okay?”

“Uh, yeah. Yeah. I think so.” She let out a breath. “Sometimes it’s so easy.”

“What’s that?”

“Believing.”

Sage was very glad for his arm as they walked into his grandmother’s house because with it around her and him right next to her, she felt like anything was possible. It felt so incredibly right. Like it was made to be there. Like he was made to be there and nowhere else. “I sure hope they’re not mad we missed lunch.”

“It’s okay. I let Mom know we were going to be a little late. I think they already ate. Our chicken might be cold though.” He opened and held the door for her.

Walking forward into the house, she let her gaze stay up and on him as their hands caught and held. “I think it was worth it.”

“I know it was.” With that, he arrested her forward progress just shy of the door and pulled her back to him.

“Luke?” Bewilderment attacked her as she slid easily right into his arms. “Your family’s right in there. What’re you doing?”

However, his gaze said it all. “Something I’ve wanted to do ever since I walked into church this morning.” And with that, he slipped his fingers onto her jawline and tangled them into her hair. “I love you… in case you ever wonder about that.”

His presence was so overwhelming that even smiling was impossible.

She laughed in a way that almost made her cry. “I don’t think I’ll ever wonder about that.”

He nodded, never letting go of her eyes. “Good.”

And then her eyes fell closed as he came toward her, softly, until their lips met, his not taking but giving only, and she fell into that kiss like she’d never fallen before. It was mind-blowingly sweet so much so that she lost any protest she might have considered making. He was so warm and safe, so tender and yet intensely solid. And he loved her. He had said it, but the kiss said it more. His arms slid down and around her and then one trailed up her back so that his palm splayed out between her shoulder blades, keeping her from falling but dangling her there as she surrendered and let him lead.

All breath and sanity vanished from her grasp, and when he pulled back to assess her, she couldn’t have protested if she’d have wanted to. Swaying there in his grasp, she could hardly find her breath or any of her senses. Blinking, she held his gaze with hers. Then, probably because she willed him to, he licked his lips and lowered them to hers once more, so soft, warm, and gentle that time itself ceased to exist. Spinning, falling, flying. What was happening, she couldn’t honestly be sure anymore as the world acquiesced its hold on her and yielded it over to his care.

When he let her go again, they were both gasping and gripping onto each other. As she dove into his embrace, she felt the rest of life drop away and float into oblivion at her feet. If she dared let him go, she would surely drift right off the earth itself.

“Darlin’, you’re worth cold chicken any day,” he whispered into her hair as his arms tightened around her.

She looked up at him, still swinging and swaying on the feel of him next to her. “Who cares about chicken?”

His smile and laugh broke some of the spell, and she was glad of that because he could have talked her into about anything at that moment. “Come on. Let’s go eat. I’m starving.”

It wasn’t her fault that Sage blushed every time she thought about that kiss, and in his grandparents’ house no less. By nightfall when he let her off at the preacher’s house, she was desperately hoping for a repeat, but this kiss held only sweetness as they stood on the front porch.

“You know, sometimes I really wonder how I’m ever going to let you go,” he whispered, holding her to him. “I keep telling myself we’re young, and we’ve got a long way to go before we could even think about making this permanent.”

Permanent. The word rocked her world.

“But I really don’t know how I’m going to live ‘til then. You make me crazy sometimes.” Gently he kissed her hair, and she giggled softly.

“Um, so you’ve… thought about this?” she asked, hoping she didn’t sound like a child but knowing she did.

“What? The making it permanent thing?”

She nodded.

“Darlin’, every time I’m around you, every time I see you, every time I dream about you, which is most nights and some afternoons... It’s not my fault. When I think about life, my life, I just can’t imagine it without you in it.”

She knew the feeling, but she didn’t know he did. “Luke…”

“I know. Believe me, I know. I’ve told myself every reason in the book that this might not work forever, that I shouldn’t think like that or hope it because it might not happen, but the truth is, no matter what happens, I’m always going to go right back here and know this was the most perfect time of my life. Just being here, with you.”

Sage heard him to the depths of her soul, and every chord he touched in her sang in harmony with the melody of her own feelings. “I love you, you know that?”

“Not half as much as I love you, darlin’. Not even close.”

The next day Sage was glad for the fact that the silver van wasn’t in the driveway when Jane dropped her off at the Lawrences’ house. She had texted Jaycee and half-expected her not to reply about coming out to paint. When she did, a whole new set of worries beset her. What would they talk about? Would Jaycee be the Jaycee from yesterday or the one from the past three months? And without Luke there, she would have no buffer against any of the hostility of her stepsister if it devolved into something ugly.

On the strength of a prayer only, she went up to the door and knocked, very thankful that Jane had seen fit to wait to leave until she got inside.

It was Ryder who came screaming from the inside of the house. “She’s here!”

Sage was sure they heard him on the moon, and then he opened the door and plunged into her arms.

“Come on.” He grabbed her hand and dragged her inside barely giving her a chance to wave at Jane. “We’ve got it all set up. Mom even got some paints out of the garage.”

When Sage broke past the mud room into the kitchen, she found Jaycee standing there, waiting. A second of awkwardness, and Jaycee shifted feet and reached up to scratch the back of her head.

“We couldn’t find much pink,” her stepsister said. “Only some in this little tube, and I think it’s hot pink not light pink.”

That her stepsister was as nervous as she was about this softened Sage’s panic. “That’s okay. A little pink can go a long way.”

“We got blue for mine,” Ryder said at her side, his demeanor ultra-serious. “And I’ll go up to yellow, but no green, and definitely no pink.”

Sage smiled at her little brother. “Oh, absolutely. We wouldn’t want to send the wrong message about girl birds being welcome.”

“That’s right.” He pointed at her and nodded.

She had to bite back the laugh, and when she looked over to her sister, she found her doing the exact same thing. “Well, what do you say we get started? Those birds aren’t going to wait forever.”

An hour later with paints all over the newspaper spread on the table, Sage sat on one side of the table and the other two were on the other side. She would paint for a little while with Jaycee and then switch and help Ryder. The girls’ birdhouse was now green and purple alternating, and Ryder’s was a solid royal blue with little yellow embellishments on it.

“So, how’s Luke?” Jaycee asked as Sage worked on Ryder’s project, and the blue paintbrush nearly skipped out of her hand.

“Oh.” Sage’s eyes went wide as fight or flight took hold of her and squeezed the air right out. “Uh. Okay. We went out to his grandma’s yesterday.” The blush followed like the day following night, and she ducked not to let her sister see it.

“They’re really nice.” Jaycee swirled on some green paint.

“Yeah.” It would be nice to breathe. Yes, yes, it would.

“Hannah’s sweet. You’ve met her, right?”

Talking without breathing was more challenging than it sounded, and Sage started to get light-headed. “Uh, yeah. I’ve met everyone except Maddie, I think.”

Jaycee smiled and nodded. “Maddie moved out to Texas a few years ago. She was really sweet too. She used to babysit us when Luke and I were little.”

Luke little. Oh, what Sage wouldn’t have given to see that. “Really?”

“It’s so weird. I remember their house almost as much as ours. We’d go over there like two or three times a week in the summer.” Jaycee put her chin on her hand that was resting on the table to get a straight on view of her creation. “I think maybe that’s why…”

Sage waited for the rest, but when it didn’t come, she glanced over. “Why what?”

The shrug bounced once. “It was so weird.”

That didn’t clear anything up. “What was weird?”

“Him with you.” Jaycee’s gaze came across the table, an apology couched there. “You’re good for him.”

The no-breathing thing attacked her again but for a completely different reason.

With a smile, Jaycee shook her head. “He needed someone to believe in him. He’s always been all… what do I have to offer anybody, and he’d never believe me when I tried to tell him. But then, I’d always say if he just did this or that, then…” She shook her head. “That’s not what I should have said.”

Holding the paintbrush above the birdhouse, Sage looked at her sister with compassion. “What should you have said?”

“Luke, you’re perfect just like you are. Don’t ever change.”

Their eyes met, and Sage knew she would never feel like fleeing from her sister again.

“That’s what you tell him,” Jaycee said. “Maybe not with words, but I see it.” Her gaze yanked down, and she let out a breath. “I’m… happy for both of you.”

Softness and compassion for how hard that had been to say went all the way down into Sage. “Thank you.”

This smile was only half. “You’re welcome.”

Luke had been out at Evan Woodall’s most of the morning. The railroad-tie lean-to barn was coming along nicely. Of course, Evan had never been one to plan very far ahead, so of course they ran out of tin halfway around the thing. With a shake of his head at how interesting people could be to work for and with, he turned up the radio and headed home for lunch.

It would be nice to have some of the afternoon to work on his own projects. Evan had said they could probably start again at three, and Luke wondered at the sanity of working on a tin roof with the sun full-up in the sky. He thought about calling Evan back and asking if they could just finish up the next day because he’d been considering working on a special project in his workshop but had about given up on having time to. A few hours in the workshop just might do the trick. However, when he turned into his driveway, worry smacked into him and he forgot all about the project and the tin roof. There sat the little silver minivan he hadn’t thought to look for when he’d passed the Lawrences. Mrs. Lawrence. What was she doing here, and what agony had she brought with her?

The two little birdhouses stood sentinel on the porch, drying in the sunshine, and Sage figured it was probably time to let Jane know she was ready.

“You hungry?” Jaycee asked from the cabinet.

“Oh. I don’t… you don’t have to feed me.”

However, Jaycee wound her lips into an off-kilter pucker. “Yeah. Like you eat so much.” Reaching into the cabinet to retrieve three plates, Jaycee glanced over her shoulder. “We could do sandwiches.” She shrugged. “I don’t think we have any caviar.”

The arrow hit Sage before she was ready for it, and she gasped.

But before she could feel the hurt, Jaycee turned to her and set the plates on the counter. “I’m sorry.” She shook her head. “Sometimes my mouth talks before my head thinks.”

Blinking back the tears, Sage nodded. “That’s okay. I don’t even like caviar.” She wrinkled her nose in disgust. “Nastiest stuff I’ve ever tasted.”

Jaycee’s eyes went wide. “You’ve really had caviar?”

“And foie gras.” Sage shivered and really thought she might throw up at the memory.

Her eyebrows lifted for the ceiling as Jayce arched her shoulders on the push of her hands on the cabinet. “Do I even want to know what that is?”

“Probably not. Do you like liver?”

“Ugh!” Jaycee shook her head. “No way.”

“Yeah. Then you don’t want to know.”

“Why would you eat that stuff?” Jaycee asked, the sandwiches forgotten for a moment.

Sage shrugged. “Because you do a lot of things you really don’t want to… to impress everybody else.”

Jaycee’s face and eyes softened with compassion. “Guess I never thought about that.”

This smile was more of a forced grimace. “Most people don’t.” Her gaze fell from her sister’s, and then she pulled it back up. “And sometimes, even when you’re doing it, you just do because that’s just how it is.”

Curiosity won out as Luke went not to the workshop but up the steps and into the house. He was hungry, and it was almost one o’clock. That should give him enough of an excuse.

Stepping into the kitchen, he found his mother and Mrs. Lawrence, sitting at the table, coffee cups between them.

“Oh, Luke,” his mother said, standing. “I thought that was going to take all day.”

“It was, but Evan ran out of tin. Surprise. Surprise.” He went to the refrigerator and took out the leftover casserole from three days before. “I’m headed out to the shop for a little bit.”

“Oh. That’s good.”

Because he was so intent on figuring out what was going on, he felt the look pass between the two women.

“Your mom showed me the new rooms,” Mrs. Lawrence said. “You did a wonderful job on them.”

The microwave beeped, and he retrieved his lunch. “That was mostly Sage, all I did was hold the brush and do what she told me.” He laughed at that as he forked through the noodles and meat. “Um, I think I’ll just take this out there.” Now that he was pretty sure his mother might be making some headway, he figured making himself scarce was a better idea than hanging around.

“Bring my dish back!” his mother called as he got to the doorway, and he waved.

“Will do!”

Sage hadn’t counted on Jane being called out on a mercy mission. When she called at almost three and found out her ride was at least two hours away from showing up, panic once again seized her. Five o’clock could mean very bad things—like people showing up she definitely did not want to meet up with.

In her old room, she sized up the suitcases still stacked there from before her banishment. As much as she didn’t want to think about it, she needed to get them ready in case this was her last chance. One at a time, she opened each one and refolded the clothing she found there. Each piece chimed ever louder just why Jaycee had hated her so much. Chiffon and cashmere, silk and linen. How much style, how much arrogance in one small pile. She sighed that thought down and kept folding until all but the bottom suitcase of clothes remained.

It was when she pulled it out and put it on the bed that she heard the back door slam, and with everything in her, she hoped that was Jaycee leaving and not someone coming in. That hope lasted about ten seconds before she heard Emily’s voice talking with Jaycee in the kitchen. “Oh, Lord,” Sage said, closing her eyes, “help.”

Holding one blush pink blouse to her heart, she breathed the prayer a second time just as her phone beeped in her pocket. She wished she could close the door, but she knew better so she dug out the little phone and swiped it on to find the text waiting.

Seriously? Have you been here the whole summer and not told me?

Confusion hit Sage like a left hook, and she tipped her head at the strange message. It was Patelyn, and Patelyn very well might have hit the wrong button. She had been known to do such things in the past.

And MOVING?!!!!!! How could you not tell me?

The next text came in before Sage could figure out how reply to the first one. And then a third blinked in.

When were you going to tell me you’re moving to Pasadena?

“Pasadena?” At that Sage really shook her head. “Patelyn, honey. You’re texting the wrong person, dear.” She texted it as she said it. “This is SAGE.” Hitting send, she let out a small laugh. Her goofy friend. Whoever knew with Patelyn.

I KNOW who this is. Why do you think I’m completely freaking out here? Did you really NOT LEAVE?!  What’s up with that?

Although it was a strange message, Sage shook her head because her friend was clearly confused. “Okay, Pate. What in the world are you talking about?” She dialed the number and put the phone to her ear. They could text all night and not get this straight.

“Sage?” Patelyn sounded as if she thought Sage was on the moon rather than on the other side of the phone.

“Pate? Yes, this is Sage. What is going on?”

“Sage.” Patelyn let out a breath. “Oh, thank goodness! I thought you were just going to disappear on us. Just POOF and evaporation-city.”

Sitting down on the bed, Sage was careful not to crush any of the items lying there. “No. I’m right here. What’s going on? What’s this about Pasadena?”

“My mom just came in, and she said she ran into your mom today. She said you’re moving to Pasadena? What, were you not going to tell us that? I thought you were coming back here for school. Mom made it sound like you’d never even left.”

Reality began to swirl around her as Sage tried to catch back onto it. “Pasadena? But we’re not… I’m not… Wait. Pasadena? That’s where Aunt Anna… Hold on. When did you say your mom talked to my mom?”

“At lunch. She said your mom was eating lunch with some lawyer.”

The room started spinning and tilting. “A lawyer? Are you sure?”

“She said you guys had been out in Pasadena for a while, that you’re moving there for school in the fall.”

Where had all the air gone? “Pate, are you… are you sure?”

“Yeees. That’s why I texted you freaking out. That’s not right, is it? It can’t be right. You’re not leaving, are you?”

Sage had absolutely no idea how to answer that. “When I talked to Mom, what was that a couple days ago, she said they were in Tuscany.”

“Well, if Tuscany is close to Pasadena, maybe, but she isn’t in Italy, that’s for sure.”

So that was why her mother had sounded so strange on the phone. She wasn’t in Tuscany at all. The question was, had she ever been in Tuscany? Sage’s heart pounded through and over and around that question like a swarming army getting ready for the attack.

“Listen, Pate, I’m going to have to call you back.”

“Okay. Are you okay?”

“What?” She hadn’t even heard the question. Then she shook out of that. “Uh, yeah, sure. I’m fine. I’ll call you later. I’m sure it’s just a misunderstanding.”

“Okay. Well, I want to know the second you get here.”

At that moment, Sage wondered if she would ever “get here” again. “I’ll let you know.”

“K. TTFN.”

“Yeah. Bye.” Sage pulled the phone from her ear, hit off, and the contacts. In three beeps she had the phone ringing again.

“Hello?” Her mother sounded asleep or drunk or both.

“Mom?” Sage asked in barely disguised panic.

“Sage? Ugh. What time is it?”

“Almost four my time. What time is it there?”

“I…” There was a loud crash. “Ugh. Stupid clock. Uh…. Um… It’s…”

“Mom, where are you?” The question was hard, and Sage stood from the bed, turned her back to the door as she sank her fingers into her hair as all-out panic engulfed her. “Are you at Aunt Anna’s? Mom…? Mom! Focus! Are you at Aunt Anna’s?”

“Is everything all right?” Emily stopped at the threshold of the door and looked inside.

When Sage spun, she had no time to get herself together, and there was too much worry coursing through her for her to even reply.

“Aunt Anna’s…?” The words were slurring now. “No, of course not, baby. Why would I be there? I’m in… I’m in London.”

“London? Mom, you weren’t going to London.” And then she knew with one-hundred percent clarity. “Where’s Jason?”

“Jason?” her mother asked as if she’d never heard that name.

“Jason. Mom. Where’s Jason. I want to talk to him. Now!”

It was then that she felt Emily step into the room, but she didn’t have the head-space to deal with that too. She turned, digging to find solid ground and finding none.

“Ericka!” someone said in the background. “What happened? Are you okay?”

“Aunt Anna,” Sage said as if she’d been shot, and she sat down heavily on the bed. The sigh took the rest of the fight right out of her. “You are at Aunt Anna’s, aren’t you?”

“Sage, wait, baby. I can explain…”

“I’m sure you can, Mom.” As the tears came up, she sniffed them down but that did no good. “Tell you what. I’ve got to go.” She looked up and Emily was standing right there in front of her, worry scrawled across her face. “I’ll call you later.”

“Sage! Please, baby…”

“Bye.” Taking the phone from her ear, she looked at it, sighed, and clicked the off button and then held it to disconnect the phone from her life.

Silence settled in the room broken only by the sounds of a television playing somewhere else in the house.

Emily looked like she’d rather be shipped to Jupiter than to be standing there, and she shifted uneasily still assessing her stepdaughter. “Is everything okay?”

There was no way to even get an act over the ache. Sage glanced up but couldn’t hold Emily’s gaze. After this, the condemnation by her stepmother would be completely justified and wholly deserved. Yes. They deserved to be trashed. They were trash.

“That was Mom,” Sage squeaked out, and tears of hurt and humiliation flooded over her. “She’s… not in Europe.”

Confusion layered over the concern on Emily’s face. “What do you mean she’s not in Europe?”

Sage shrugged and beat back the tears. “I don’t even know if she went to Europe.”

Nothing moved for a long minute as Emily tried to process that. “Then where is she?”

Trying to process it all herself, Sage blinked slowly, purse her lips, and shook her head. “I think she’s at my Aunt Anna’s, in Pasadena.”

“California?” Emily asked as if suffering from a lack of air.

“Yeah.” Sage got a sad smile to her face. “Great, huh?”

Coming over to the bed, Emily sat down on it near Sage but not really next to her. A second and then another and she put her hand over onto Sage’s shoulder. “Are you okay?”

One look at her stepmom, and Sage couldn’t hold the heartache back. “Not really.”

“Oh, sweetheart.” And remarkably it didn’t sound harsh, sarcastic or ironic.

“She lied to me.” The words came out as if she needed them on the record somewhere. “She’s… been lying to me. All summer.”

Emily sighed but said nothing.

“I don’t understand. Why would she do that?” Sage stood and took a step before turning. “Do you think…” Then other pieces started falling into place. Patelyn. The lawyer. Pasadena. “Are they getting a divorce?”

“I honestly don’t know. Your dad’s been trying…”

“That’s why they sent me here, isn’t it? It wasn’t for a second honeymoon. It was to get me out of the way.”

“I think they really were trying, sweetheart. I know that’s what she’s told your dad.”

“I’m such an idiot.” The swirling started again. “What am I going to tell my friends?” She stopped. “My friends? What friends? I live in Pasadena now. They don’t live in Pasadena. I do. I don’t want to live in Pasadena. Who wants to live in Pasadena?”

“Come here.” Emily stood, put her arm around Sage and led her out the door and into the den where she sat her on the couch. “Here. Sit down for a minute. Let me call your dad. Maybe he knows something we don’t.”

Looking up through vision streaked with tears, Sage’s spirit flipped into freak-out mode. “Tell him I don’t want to live in Pasadena.”

“I’ll be sure to tell him.”

It wasn’t long after her stepmother had gone out to make the call that Jaycee found her way into the den. Sheepishly, she lifted her shoulders. “Is something wrong?”

Sage took one look at her and laughed softly. “Yeah, my whole life. Everything was a lie. Yay me.” She put her hands up jazz-style and shook her head. “You were right though. Looks like we’re back to me being one big, giant mistake. Can’t get away from being that for long, can I?”

“Sage,” Jaycee said, and she looked as if she might start crying. “I’m so sorry about saying that. I didn’t mean it.”

However, Sage knew better. “Yes you did, and it’s the truth. I’m just not sure which is more true, the mistake or the lie.”

Jaycee came all the way over to the couch then and stood there, hands in her back pockets looking down. “Can I do anything?”

Swiping at the tears that didn’t seem to be getting the message she didn’t want nor need them, Sage looked up. “Rewind back to sometime that things actually made some sense.” But even as she said it, the harsh part of her asked when that would be. Before her father left for California 19 years ago? Yes, at least back that far.

“Your dad is on his way,” Emily said, sweeping into the room but stopping when she saw her daughter standing there.

With everything in her, Sage hated seeing only their thighs as they stood shoulder-to-shoulder in front of her. A judge and jury pronouncing sentence couldn’t have felt any worse. Finally, Emily sank and sat on the couch.

“I don’t want to go to Pasadena,” Sage said, her voice breaking on the thought. “I don’t even know anyone in Pasadena.”

“We’ll think of something,” her stepmother said, but Sage knew just like the rest of her life, that was a lie too. Her stepmother didn’t care if she moved to Mars so long as she wasn’t there.

“Yeah.” Jaycee sat down on the other side of her, slightly behind her. “Dad’ll know what to do. He will.”

Don’t cry, Sage. The thought was barely a whisper, drowned out by the bleeding of her heart. Do not break down now. Not like this. Not in front of them. They will only use it against you. She sniffed and picked up her head, shaking it and fighting to remain stable. “I just can’t believe it, you know?” The shaking became slower as her head went back and forth. “All this time. I thought she was in Europe. How could I have been so gullible?”

“We all did,” Emily said. “We all believed her, and why wouldn’t we? Why would she ever have lied about this?”

Sage wasn’t sure if she was asking for an answer or not, but she felt obliged to make one for the both of them. “I don’t know. Maybe she just wanted some peace and quiet for a change. Maybe I was in the way.” The words crumpled her face, and she bit her lips to keep the tears from falling.

“Oh, Sage, no,” Jaycee said. “I’m sure this has nothing to do with you.”

But Sage knew better, and she knew they did too. Pasadena. She wondered what it was like this time of year.

Chapter 39

The second her father showed up, Jaycee vacated the den and headed to the living room. Sage was in tears, and she had no idea how to fix that. She hoped her dad would. It was strange how just last week, she would have gladly sent her stepsister back with a one-way ticket, but now… now, she was beginning to think that Sage had never been the put-together pristine princess she had made her out to be when she’d arrived.

Taking out her cell phone, she knew someone who would want to know, and she typed in a quick message and hit SEND. She didn’t know what to do, but she had a suspicion that Luke would. The craziest thing was how her heart felt when she thought about him now. He was a good guy, good for her sister. A stand-up guy who did the right thing even when his best friend was being a lunatic about everything.

He had forgiven her just for the asking, and Jaycee vowed right then that if they needed her, she would do whatever it took to be there for them. They were right together, and she smiled softly at that. “Luke, Sage needs you,” Jaycee whispered. “Please don’t bail on her now.”

“What happened?” Her father sat carefully on the couch between Sage and his wife, looking at her like she was fragile glass that might shatter at any moment.

“I…” Sage dipped her gaze to keep it from his. “Patelyn texted me that Mom’s been in California all summer. ‘Course Pate didn’t know I didn’t know that.” She sniffed a laugh. “What should I expect, right? Mom lies to everyone else. Why should I think I was any different?”

His eyes never lost the concern. “She’s in Pasadena?”

Sage nodded. “With Aunt Anna. Pate said her mom saw her talking to a lawyer. I guess you were right. They are getting a divorce.”

Her father glanced back at his wife. “We were hoping it wouldn’t come to that.”

However, Sage shrugged. “Crazy thing is, I’ve been begging her to leave him for years. Now that she is…” She turned her head because the tears were getting harder and harder to hold back. With a sniff, she determinedly brought her head back around, refusing to lose it even now. “I don’t think they went to Europe either. Nice, huh? She lied to you guys. She lied to me. She lied to everybody.”

“Sage…” her father said.

“No.” Pulling her eyes up to his, she put on her smiley face. “I’m okay. Really I am.”

“But you’re not,” her stepmother said. “Sage, this would be hard for anybody…”

“I just don’t want you to think I can’t…” Sage’s bravado failed for one second, and she crushed back the tears. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry about ruining your summer. I’m sorry about coming. I’m sorry about everything.” With tears lacing her lashes, she looked up at them. “I know Mom put you guys in a really bad place. I guess I never thought about what it would be like for you if I came here.” She lifted her eyebrows. “I didn’t think about a lot of things back then.” This sniff was harder, harsher, more heart-cracking. “I know what you said, what the pastor and Jane said about me staying, but I don’t want to make it harder on you, any of you.”

“Sage,” both of them said at the same time.

Her father tipped his head to look into her eyes. “You’re not making it harder on us. Yes, we’ve had some things to work out and work through, but that wasn’t your fault.”

“But if I’d never come. If I wasn’t here…”

“Those things would still be here because of us,” he said. “Not because of you.”

She put her elbow on the back of the couch and her fingers to her hair. “I just don’t want to be in everybody’s way.”

“You’re not…” her stepmother started and then stopped when they both looked at her. For a second, she dropped her gaze and then dragged it back up again. “Look, Sage, I know I haven’t been very kind to you. Fact, the truth is, I’ve been a lot like the evil stepmother to be really honest. I guess I just thought you were judging me, so I had the right to judge you.”

“But I wasn’t judging you,” Sage said, her gaze coming up. “At least I didn’t think I was. Maybe I was.” Her eyes fell. “I just… I thought… I don’t know.”

“That’s okay,” her father said. “I think all of us have been spinning in I don’t know. I know I have.” He looked back at his wife who nodded. “But the thing I do know is that I want to be here for you, Sage. I want to be your dad even though a lot of times, I feel like I don’t know how to do that. You’re so worldly and grown up. What do you even need me for? It’s like I missed the time I could actually be useful, if I ever could have.”

These tears were wistful. “I never really had a dad.” She shrugged. “I had Jason, but with him I was so much better out-of-sight-out-of-mind. He didn’t care who I went out with or who I was going with or where I was going. He was just glad I was leaving. I knew that, so I made it a point to be anywhere but home.” She laughed a short, sarcastic little laugh. “It was so much better when I was Sage Hollywood, out on the town and out of everyone’s way. I hated going home.”

Sniffing, she pursed her lips together. “I never told anybody that. But I did. I hated being at home. I hated going back home at night after I’d been out. I never knew what I was going to find.” She nodded slowly. “And I couldn’t tell anybody because they all thought I lived this perfect, wonderful, glamorous life in this beautiful mansion up on the hill.” Even the tears dried then. “But it was all a lie. A lie I hated with everything in me. But I didn’t know how to get out of it. And then I got shipped out here, and I thought things would be different. One small, little part of me actually hoped things would be different, and it was, I guess. At home the hate was silent. Here, not so much.”

“Oh, Sage,” her stepmother said. “I’m so sorry.”

“No,” Sage said quickly, realizing what she had just said. “It wasn’t your fault.”

“You know,” her father said, “that’s what Luke was saying, wasn’t it?”

Sage looked up. “What?”

Her father shook his head. “That. That whole trying to talk someone out of saying the truth about things. Maybe it’s time we stop tip-toeing around this and meet it head-on.”

Sage recoiled at the idea. That sounded like a good way to get smashed. “Oh, I don’t think…”

“Are you sure about that?” Emily asked even over her stepdaughter’s protest.

“Look,” he said, “the truth is, I love you both. I do. Differently, yes. But with all my heart. Just like I love Jaycee and Ryder. I’m not sure how to fix this, but what I want more than anything is for us to be a family. A real family. Yes, a family who is going to make mistakes and get things wrong, but a family who works things out together and is honest with each other and above everything else, loves each other so much that we’d be willing to fight the world to the death to protect each other if need be.” He turned and looked at his wife. “That’s what I want more than anything, but I can’t do that alone. I can’t fix this alone.” His gaze went back to Sage. “And we sure can’t fix it if we’re not brave enough to be honest with each other.

“Now, I’m no Pastor Steve, but I do know the truth is not always pretty and it’s not going to be easy to say or to hear, but we need to be honest with each other about this stuff. We need to know where we are with things. We need to be on the same page with things, and that’s impossible to know and be if we’re not at the base of things really honest with each other.”

As she sat there, Sage swallowed down the fear because it was threatening to drown her in its depths. However, she knew her father was right. They couldn’t fix it if they didn’t have all the pieces. She opened her eyes and let out a long breath. “I don’t want to go to Pasadena.”

He smiled at her and took a breath. “I think that’s a good place to start.”

Their living room was looking like a Bible study meet-up when they came out. Jane and Pastor Steve were both there as was Luke. Her father had his arm around Sage who was still battling the tears but was at least better now.

“Oh. Pastor,” her father said in surprise, and he stepped over to shake the man’s hand.

Jane took one look at Sage and stepped forward to wrap her arms around her. “Are you okay? Jaycee called us and told us what happened.”

“She did?” Sage’s eyes went wide as she looked over to her sister who put her hands in her back pockets as if in fear she was about to get reamed.

“I thought they should know.”

Sage smiled at her sister. “Thank you.” And she tightened her hold on Jane. “Thank you for coming.”

Taking one step back, Jane put her hands on Sage’s face. “Are you okay?”

A small nod and Sage sighed. “Getting there.”

Surprisingly Emily suggested they all stay for supper, and one-by-one they agreed. It was when the others had gone into the kitchen that Sage and Luke met in the middle of the living room. Her head was down, and he knew why. Gently he put his arms around her and simply held her there. There were no words, so he didn’t try to complicate the moment with them. Instead, he only sent up a few silent ones drifting to Heaven from his heart for her, and he hoped that was enough.

“Jaycee,” their father said at the conclusion of the meal, “why don’t you take Ryder in and watch some baseball? I think the Sox are playing tonight.”

A second and her sister nodded. “Okay.”

With that, her siblings vacated the table. It took a solid ten seconds before anyone said anything.

“Pastor,” her father finally started, “we will be forever grateful to you and Jane for taking Sage in like you did.”

“It was our pleasure,” Jane said with a smile at Sage.

“While I’m not sure of a lot of things right now, what I do know is that Sage belongs out here with us, not up town with you all.” He paused to let that sink in, and when he looked over at Emily, her short smile and the acceptance that traced through her eyes spurred him to continue. “I also think that Pasadena is not where she should be.” With those words, he looked right at Sage who huddled into Luke’s protective embrace. “So tomorrow I’m going to call her mom, and we’re going to work out how she can stay here at least for her senior year because that’s what she wants.”

With a soft smile, Sage nodded, and Luke leaned over and kissed her hair.

“Now I know, I’ve gotten a lot of things wrong in this mess,” her father continued and he dipped his head. “A lot of things. But right here, right now, I’m promising you all that things are going to change.” He sat forward, dragging his hand out of Emily’s and folding it with his other. “But the truth is, I’m going to need your help with this one.” His gaze swept the table. “All of you. I’m going to need you to be honest with me and to hold me accountable because I have this bad habit of running when things get tough.” He sat back and put his hand on Emily’s. “In fact, I think that’s what started this whole thing in the first place.”

Letting out a long breath, he nodded. “We’re here, and how we got here isn’t nearly as important as what we decide to do from here on out.”

Just behind him, Jaycee appeared in the doorway, and he swung his attention that way. With a smile, he reached back for her hand and drew her around and onto his lap. “The truth is, I have two daughters and one son who I love more than I ever realized was possible.” His gaze came over and held on Sage. “And they all deserve to have a father.” Then he glanced at Emily. “And I have a wife who challenges me and loves me even though, honestly, I don’t deserve her love.” A swallow and a nod, and he looked around at all of them. “I guess what I’m just trying to say is that I’m sorry to all of you about the mistakes I’ve made, and from now on, I’m going to try to do better.”

Pastor Steve nodded. “I think that’s a really good place to start.”

Luke agreed to take Sage to get her things from the pastor’s house, and as they drove back to town, he looked over at her. “How’re you doing?” Most of the time he could at least get a quick read of her. Tonight, she just looked exhausted.

“I don’t know.” She had her head back on the headrest, and she didn’t move it. “What if going back is a bad idea? What if it’s like it was before?”

“Do you think it will be?”

“I’m not sure what to think anymore. Every time I think I know what to think it turns out completely wrong.”

Gently he reached over, took her hand and kissed it. “Everything?”

That made her smile a little bit. “Okay. Not everything.” She sighed. “What do you think?”

He considered how to answer that. “Jaycee was really worried about you.” When she didn’t answer, he glanced at her. “I’m not sure I’ve ever seen her that worried before. She texted me, you know, and then she called when I didn’t answer right away.”

“Why didn’t you answer?”

“’Cause I was on top of a tin roof in August, answering texts wasn’t exactly on my most important things to do list at that moment. But after the thing rang like six times in two minutes, I gave up thinking it was nothing.” Flitting his gaze her direction, he smiled. “I’m glad I did.”

“Me too.”

They pulled up to the pastor’s house, and sadness cloaked her eyes. “Is it crazy that I’m going to miss this place?”

Luke smiled. “No, but something tells me you can always come back if you need to.”

Sage nodded slowly. “I’m lucky, huh?”

“That you are.” He shut off the car and got out to go get her. “Let’s go get you moved back home where you belong.”

Taking her hand so she wouldn’t run like it looked like she wanted to, Luke led her up the steps and into the house without bothering to ring the doorbell. Once inside, he called, “Knock. Knock.” Just so they would know someone had come in.

“Are you sure?” Pastor Steve came out of his office, reading glasses on, and cell phone at his ear. He looked at them with something of a scowl, stopping them both in one step.

Luke looked down at her, and Sage let her eyes go wide with undisguised panic.

“Okay. Yeah. Okay.” He looked at them again. “I’ll tell them. Thanks, Mac.” With that, he beeped off the phone and stood there for a second before he shook his head. “Well, that was an interesting phone call.”

Neither one moved for fear of breaking the next bad thing that hovered over them free.

“Remember those envelopes on Sunday?” Pastor Steve asked Luke who nodded slowly. Then his gaze slid to Sage, and he let out a small, disbelieving laugh. “All those envelopes?”

“Yyyyeah?” Luke asked in concern. “What about them?”

“Well, it looks like we took in enough to get a brand new refrigerator and maybe even do some upgrades to the line warmers.”

“What?” That sent Luke backward. “How?”

“Well,” the pastor said and then his face broke into a wide grin, “it seems that someone has been doing some inspiring these days.” He grinned at Sage who looked completely bewildered.

“I didn’t do anything,” she replied weakly.

However, Luke’s gaze followed his grin. “I think you might be wrong about that, darlin’.”

“I can’t believe it,” Sage said when they headed back to the Lawrences’. “I thought for sure we were going to be doing bake sales until Jesus came back again to pay for that thing.”

“You and me both.” Luke lifted her hand and kissed it. “I always knew you were amazing.”

Her spirit dipped. “I feel bad for Jane and the pastor though. They were so nice to me.”

Luke nodded. “Well, maybe God’s got something good in store for them too.”

“I sure hope so.”

“Me too.”

Back at her home, her dad met them at the back door to help carry her three bags back inside. No one mentioned the heap of clothes still piled in the middle of the bed, and Sage was glad for that.

“Um, Sage,” her dad said, “if you have a minute…”

“Oh.” She glanced up at Luke. “Sure.”

“Don’t mind me,” Luke said. “I was needing to get home anyway. Gotta be up on that roof before the sun comes up tomorrow, or I’m gonna fry.”

Before she could think for him to do otherwise, Luke leaned down and gave her a peck. Then he snagged her gaze. “Let me know if you need anything.”

Never letting his eyes go, she nodded. “I will.”

And with that, he ducked past her dad and headed out.

When he was gone, she didn’t know what came next, or how to make the next minutes less awkward.

“Do you mind if we go outside for a few minutes?” her dad asked.

“Oh. Uh, no. That’s fine.”

He nodded and brushed his hand in front of him for her to exit first. Through the darkened kitchen and out to the porch they went.

“Uh, where?” she asked, turning just as her gaze snagged on the two little mismatched birdhouses sitting there.

“Here if you don’t mine,” he said, indicating the porch steps, and gracefully Sage lowered herself to the little wooden planks and waited for him to do the same.

The moon was already coming up over the field beyond, and she watched it, afraid to look over at him.

“I called your mom,” he finally said after a few seconds. “She feels terrible about what happened.”

Sage nodded, not wanting to let even a crack appear in the dam again.

“We talked, and she agreed that for now, it’s better if you stay out here with us.”

The nodding continued though it hurt more now. Torn. It was a great word for this feeling.

“Just so you know, your mom’s problems and choices were not your fault.” He pulled his foot up closer to him, making a scraping sound on the wood. “I know it’s hard to believe sometimes, but we adults don’t really have a lot of things together. We’re as lost as anyone. I know my leaving hurt your mom a lot. I know what I did wasn’t fair to her, and she was just trying to navigate a really tough situation.” His gaze slid out to the moon and then dropped back to his hands. “I never meant for this to happen, for you and her to get so hurt over my selfishness and stupidity. And then I think if it wasn’t for me going out there, I wouldn’t have you, and… well, that’s not a trade I’m willing to make either. And I know your mom feels the same way.”

Absorbing only, Sage listened.

“I realize it’s a long time coming, but if you’ll let me, I want to learn to be the dad I never was to you. I know that’s asking a lot, and that things haven’t gone real smoothly when we tried before, but if you’ll give me another chance, I’ll try to do it better this time around.”

She wanted to believe him. She just wasn’t sure about the rest of the family. “And Emily?”

He breathed that question down. “Emily is working through her own stuff, but we’ve talked a lot in the last few days, and she’s willing to work on being a family, you included. Not that we’re going to get everything right. Trust me, if I’ve learned nothing else, it’s that we’re not perfect, and we’re going to make our share of mistakes. But if you’re willing to help us, maybe we can find some space that we can all be okay with things.”

She nodded. It wasn’t everything, but it was a start. The question went through her mind and then over her heart three times before she got anything out. “Do you mind if I ask you a question?”

“Don’t mind at all. What’s the question?”

“Did you love her?” Her gaze traced across and over to him. “My mom, I mean? Did you love her when you were together?”

Instead of pulling it toward him, her dad let his foot go out, and it did that scraping thing again. “You know, I thought I did. Really and truly. Your mom…” He smiled and then shook his head. “She was a fascinating person.” He looked over at her. “A lot like you actually. She was super creative and just this free-spirit, imaginative, amazing young woman. I remember her showing me some of her work once, pottery and painting. She was like that, your mom, just artistic as all get-out.

“Of course, art doesn’t pay the bills, so she was working, and that’s where we met. I was taken with her about half-a-second after she said hello.” Shaking his head, he put his gaze on his shoes. “Truth is, I fell head-over-heels for her, and I was so amazed she actually liked me.” He let out a breath. “I knew it was wrong. Em and I were only separated at the time, but as bad as that sounds, I didn’t really care. I thought Ericka’s attention and affection proved I didn’t need Em, that I could be fine all on my own without her. That sounds terrible, I know, but that’s how I thought back then. I was hurt, and this was a way to hurt Em, to prove she didn’t own me.”

He put his head down. “I guess, when I really think about it, the answer to your question is no, I didn’t really love your mom. Not real love anyway. I know now that real love does what’s best for the other person, it doesn’t use the other person to make yourself feel better or for your own entertainment. Your mom was an awesome person, and she didn’t deserve what I did to her. None of you did. You. Your mom. Em. Jaycee. Even Ryder. You all deserved a whole lot better than me.”

Strangely, Sage knew exactly how he felt. “Mom loved you.” Sage nodded, as sure of the words as she was of anything else in her life. “She talked about you all the time when I was little, how handsome you were, how nice you were, how much she loved you.” Sitting forward, Sage put her wrists on her knees. “Then one day, she stopped talking about you, and I never really understood why. It wasn’t long, and she married Jason, and everything changed for all of us. She stopped doing art because it would make a mess, and Jason couldn’t stand for anyone to do that. We never went to the Pottery House again. Just stopped going. She traded out all of her funky clothes for business suits and silks, and all of my old clothes went in the dumpster.”

Her father looked over at her, and she managed a smile.

“She said everything would be better because Jason would take care of us now, but we both know how that turned out.” Sage let out a long breath. “For years, I dreamt about you, what you were like, that you were coming to get me, that you would show up looking for me.” She let her gaze go over to his and then dropped the connection. “Mom always said your home was more important than she was, and I guess I finally decided she was right. It was more important than me too.”

“I’m so sorry, Sage.”

“I know.” She nodded. “But you said about being honest.”

“I did.”

She nodded again. “That’s what I’m being… honest.”

It was almost midnight when they finally got up and went inside, and for the first time, the house didn’t feel vindictive and frightening anymore. Of that, she was imminently thankful.

Luke had just put in the last of the screws into the tin roof when his cell phone beeped in his pocket. Carefully he crawled down the ladder and jumped to the ground before he answered it. Sweating and feeling rather dehydrated, he put the phone to his ear and went over to the pickup to get some water.

“This is Luke. Talk to me.” At the pickup, he retrieved a cup and ran the water from the cooler, grateful for the drink as he leaned against the hot metal of the truck and swiped at his forehead.

“Luke. Oh, good. I’m glad I caught you. This is Pastor Steve. Listen. Mac found us a fridge, but we’re going to have to get his out of here first. Do you have any time this afternoon or evening to help me?”

Squinting up at his just completed project, he let out a sigh. So much for getting to that special project after this one. “Sure thing, Pastor. When do you want me to come?”

“Just whenever you can. I think Mac’s going to pick this one up after work and drop the other one off.”

“So four?”

“Four sounds perfect.”

“I’ll be there.”

“Great. Thanks so much.”

“No problem.”

Not bothering to go home and change after inspecting the cattle shed from top-to-bottom, Luke met the pastor at just past four o’clock.

“Looks like you’ve been working,” Pastor Steve said.

“No rest for the weary.”

The pastor held out his hand, and Luke shook it. “Thanks for meeting me. Mac helped me last time, and between you, me, and that fence post over there, that’s not a job for a 70 year old man to be tackling.”

Luke smiled his agreement as he followed the pastor inside the community center and held the door, liking the rush of cool air that blasted him. Inside, the pastor found the lights and flipped them on.

“Has Mrs. P turned in the grocery list for Saturday yet?” Luke asked as they went over to the borrowed refrigerator. He knew enough to know why he had been summoned, and it wasn’t so the pastor could do all the work. Sitting down on his heels, he reached back and around the thing, realizing they were going to have to pull it out so he could get to the plug.

“Not yet. I figure I’ll have it by tomorrow. You mind getting the groceries?”

“Nah.” Standing, Luke opened the doors of the refrigerator to make sure nothing was going to shift when he repositioned it. “I’m sure Sage will come and help. It gives her a reason to shop.” He set his feet and took hold of the refrigerator, sliding it forward just enough to give him room between it and the wall.

“How is Sage?”

Luke tipped his head as he went digging for the cord again. “Far as I know okay. I texted her this morning, and she said they hadn’t thrown her out yet.” Finally, he got a hand on the thing and yanked it from the wall.

“I sure hope all of that works out. I sure have been doing a lot of praying over it.”

Hopping back to his feet, Luke nodded. “Me too.” He shook his head with a grin as he retrieved the dolly from near the door. “You know, that was some sermon on Sunday. I didn’t take you for the fearless sort.”

Pastor Steve laughed and rubbed his hand across the back of his neck. “Believe me, that was not my idea.” He stepped forward to help with the awkward appliance as Luke got the dolly under it and tipped it backward.

“Oh, yeah? Then whose was it?” Carefully, he angled the thing into the walking space between the other appliances and the counter.

“God’s. And trust me, I did everything I could think of to talk Him out of it.”

That snapped Luke’s gaze over to the pastor who looked positively stunned. “I don’t think I’m getting you.”

The pastor laughed. “I wasn’t getting me either.” At the door, they let the thing down carefully. There was no use to go out and stand in the hot sun if they didn’t have to. “For three days I argued about not wanting to give that. I kept telling Him that wasn’t a good idea, people knew too much, people were going to talk more than normal if I did that.”

Luke leaned on the stove and crossed his arms and ankles. “Wait. You actually argued with God?”

Across the walkway, the pastor pulled himself up to the counter and sat down. “I did.” He nodded. “Not a very pastorly thing to do, huh?”

Not sure how to not agree with that, Luke tipped his head. “So why didn’t you just do it on something else?”

At that the pastor leaned forward, his elbows on his knees, his head down. “Believe me, I wanted to, but every time I tried to come up with something different, nothing came. I mean nothing. Like dry ice in a black hole. My mind would just go completely blank. I think I finished that one about four a.m. on Sunday, and even when I got up there, I still didn’t want to give it. I didn’t want to say those words. There were too many I knew were going to hit people square where they were.” He laughed. “Half of them hit me like that, and I wrote the thing.” His gaze came up, and there was an apology in it. “And I knew how Sage would probably hear it too. I knew she didn’t need beaten down any more than she already was, and to stand up there and talk about forgiveness after what she’s been through…” Shaking his head, he sat back. “I felt like Satan himself accusing her.”

“But it wasn’t about her.”

“Maybe not.” Pastor Steve rubbed his hands together. “But I can never be sure what people are going to take away from one, and that one was about as hard-hitting as any one I’ve ever given. It gave me some sleepless nights even after I gave it.”

“Seriously?” Strange how Luke had never considered this side of all the words he’d heard in church. He’d never considered the pastor wrestling with God until the early morning hours about what he was going to say and how to say it.

“Seriously.”

The door came open with a snap, and both of them jerked toward it.

“Well, looks like you fellas have been busy,” Mac said as they jumped back into action. He swung the doors open and made them stay that way. “What do you say you come say hello to your brand new refrigerator?”

When Luke stepped out, he couldn’t stop the smile. He only wished she could be here to share in this moment.

“Oh, wow,” the pastor said. “Looks mighty fine to me. How about you, Luke?”

“I don’t think we’re going to have any trouble breaking this one in. Let’s get it down and into its new home.”

The whole day Sage had fought against holing up in her room. It wasn’t easy, but she had accomplished it. She, Jaycee, and Ryder had hung up the birdhouses—in two separate trees of course. Emily had gone into town afterward to take Ryder to swimming. That left the two girls to fill the afternoon, and after a short discussion about upcoming classes in the new school, Jaycee had suggested that Sage get the summer reading so she wouldn’t be completely behind when she started.

Summer reading turned out to be more challenging than Sage had thought, and with her only option her phone, she spent the rest of the afternoon hunkered down over it in the den. By five o’clock she needed a break because she could feel the pupils in her eyes, and she had the sneaking suspicion that wasn’t a good thing.

Blinking, she walked into the kitchen and found Jaycee at the refrigerator. “Peanut butter and jelly? I’m telling you,” Sage said, “anything sounds good right about now.” She reached up and swiped at her eyes that had commenced running in protest.

Jaycee laughed softly. “How’s the reading going?”

“Oh, fab. It would be nice, however, if they would tell me who is actually telling me this story.”

Coming to the counter with three round bricks of ground beef, Jaycee laughed again. “You should call Luke. Maybe he knows.”

Sage slumped against the sink. “I might have to. I sure wish someone had told me to start this in June. I can’t even tell how many pages it is because my dumb phone just says eight more hours. Eight more hours. Eight more hours.”

“Eight hours? Yikes.”

“Yeah, double yikes because I read for two and it only went down like 30 minutes.” She bent and rested her chin in her hands watching her sister. “Whatcha making?”

“Tacos. Mom’s not going to be home until six. She wanted me to start them.”

“Mmmm.” Sage remembered her last bout with taco meat at the community center. “I wonder what they’re serving for the meal this weekend. I sure hope it’s not ham again.”

“Or spaghetti,” Jaycee said, and her smile dragged out Sage’s.

Pulling on a strand of hair gently, Sage shrugged. “I can’t believe Mrs. P even let us back in that kitchen.”

“I can’t believe Luke got all that stuff off the walls.”

“No kidding. Sometimes I think he must be Spiderman or something.”

Jaycee hit the microwave buttons to send the thing whirling and turned to her sister. “So I guess you two are a thing then?”

That made Sage giggled, and she shrugged again. “I hope so. He sure is great. I just hope he’s not making a mistake going out with me.”

The comment made Jaycee mash her lips together with guilt and her gaze dropped to her shoes. A second and she lifted her head and brushed the hair from her eyes. “Not possible. You’re not a mistake.”

For the smallest of seconds, Sage thought she hadn’t heard correctly, and then she realized she had. Tears sprang to her eyes. “Are you sure about that?”

With a sad, sorrow-filled smile, Jaycee nodded. “Absolutely.”

“You should see this thing,” Luke said on Friday as he and Sage pulled up with the groceries for Bar-B-Que chicken, potato salad, pinto beans, and lettuce. “It’s huge. It has dual-temp, turbo air, and it’s on casters, so I don’t have to break my back to move the thing.”

“Where are you going to move it to?” Sage asked as she got out.

“Who cares? It moves.” He sounded so happy, she couldn’t not absorb his joy.

“It just too bad we don’t have lots to put in it this time. I was looking forward to seeing what it would really do.” Luke dragged five grocery bags out of the trunk, and she took three. At the door, he unlocked it and held it with his foot for her.

Once inside, he reached over and turned on the light to illuminate his new toy. “See, what I’m talking about?” He dropped the groceries to the counter and went over to the refrigerator where he hugged the thing. “Oh, I missed you.”

“Hello,” Sage called, “jealous girlfriend over here.” But she wasn’t mad because she knew he wasn’t serious. At least she hoped he wasn’t serious.

“I’ll be back, baby,” he said to the stainless steel appliance. “Don’t miss me too much.”

Sage shook her head. “You need therapy.”

“Actually, what I need is help. You do realize we’ve got to cook this chicken and start all these beans tonight, by ourselves, right?”

“Mrs. P isn’t coming in?”

“Nope. She’s in Greely. Her son’s daughter just had a baby.”

“Awww.”

“Yeah. Aww all you want, that still leaves us here to cook.” He bent down and retrieved a slow cooker. “She said to wash the beans and put them all in these.” Out came another one. “We’re supposed to cut up the jalapenos and put them in one, and leave the other two with just salt and pepper.”

Sage lifted her eyebrows. “And you know how to do all of this?”

“I was kinda hopin’ you did.”

She laughed a short laugh. “That’s funny. You’re so funny.”

“But first off, why don’t we get the rest of the groceries in? We can let these two things heat up.”

“Wish you would have told me to be practicing the weights. I’ve been reading on my phone all week.” Unloading the groceries on the counter, she sighed. “By the way, have you figured out who’s talking in that book Jaycee made me get? The one for the summer reading?”

It was at that moment that she realized he wasn’t moving, and she looked up. “What?”

His half-grin etched on his face. “Do you know how impossible it is going to be to think about class with you sitting right there with me? I am not going to get anything done.”

“Even less than usual?” she teased.

“Far less than usual.” He went back to work, filling the slow cookers with water.

“That’s not good. You do that, and they might send me home.”

Just then, there was a knock on the door, and Sage looked up at him in surprise and concern because she was the closest to the thing. “Who would that be?”

Luke picked up his hand to keep her where she was as he went over to the door and opened it.

“Oh, Luke, good. You’re here.” The little woman who looked like a strong wind would land her in Tennessee came in on Luke’s push carrying two bags filled to the brim.

Instantly he reached for them and took them. “Mrs. Ellis?” Luke asked. “What’s this?”

“Just some extras from my garden. I hoped you might use them tomorrow for your meal.”

Curiously, Sage peered over at the bags that were filled with green things and yellow things and red things.

“Bell peppers,” Luke said, pulling two of them out. “This will be perfect with the bar-b-que.

Mrs. Ellis smiled. “Oh, good. I was hoping you could use them.”

However, before she got that out, there was another knock on the door. Seeing Luke preoccupied with Mrs. Ellis, Sage went and opened it.

“Oh. Good. I was hoping someone was here. I saw the cars.”

What Sage saw were the grocery bags in the woman’s hands.

“We’re here. Can I help you?”

“I sure hope so. We’ve had a great year with our garden, and I had some extra cucumbers.” The lady came in, took one look at the others, and laughed. “Looks like I’m not the only one with the good idea. “Hi, Edna.”

“Why Frances,” Edna said. “Oh, don’t those cucumbers just look divine.”

Luke glanced over the two women’s heads at Sage who was fighting not to laugh at their chatter.

She had no more shrugged than another knock came at the door. With surprise plastered on her face, she went to it.

“Looks like you all are having a party,” the man in the cowboy hat boomed, and he came in without her doing one single thing more.

“Hey, Mac.” Luke came over to shake the man’s hand. “Looks like that refrigerator is going to be put to some good use.”

“That’s what I like to hear.” Mac handed over the bags in his hands. “Were you needing help with the rest of those groceries out there?”

“Uh. Absolutely. We were just saying we’re going to be up here for a while. Mrs. P left us to make bar-b-que, beans, and potato salad. Not sure what she was thinking.”

“Oh, do you kids need some help?” Mrs. Ellis asked, keying in to Luke’s conversation. “I don’t mind washing out some beans if you need.”

“Oh, well, we wouldn’t…” Luke started.

“Uh, Luke.” Sage came up beside him and put her hand on his arm. “These nice ladies have offered to help us.” She raised her eyebrows at him. “Don’t you think it would be rude to not be grateful about that?”

It took him a minute, and then he smiled. “You know what, Sage here has a point. We would love some help if you all are interested.”

“You know,” Mac said, “I can call Connie. I’m sure she’d love to get out of the house. And her potato salad is to die for.”

“That is true,” Mrs. Ellis said. “She makes it for every Ladies meeting we have.”

Luke looked stunned and finally he shrugged. “Then call Connie. We’d love to have all the help we can get.”

He’d had no idea what he’d done. Sage was sure of that an hour later when the two of them could hardly find each other in the large kitchen. Around the counter, stood a row of women, some cutting up vegetables that somehow just kept showing up, others putting the chicken into pans to cook. Mac and Luke seemed to be everywhere at once, supervising the beans and the potatoes that were now cooking in the big pots along the wall.

“You run a pretty tight kitchen,” Mac said, putting his hand on Luke’s shoulder. “I worked in the Navy mess for years. I’m impressed.”

Just then the outside door swung open, and Pastor Steve stepped in from the sunshine followed by Jane. Seeing them all, he looked positively stunned.

“I thought we were cooking for tomorrow,” he said to Luke as Sage went and hugged Jane.

“We are,” Luke said, shaking his hand. “Looks like the community showed up to help.”

In all his time working the community meals, Luke had never seen so many people helping. They got finished in record time on Friday night, and Saturday morning, he showed up to find three people standing outside the back doors waiting for him. Even Mrs. P hadn’t shown up yet.

“I’m not sure what I can help with,” Lynn Collins said as Luke unlocked the door, “but you show me what to do, and I’ll get it done.”

“Me too,” Debbie Smith said.

“Um, I don’t know how much we can do before Mrs. P gets here.” Luke’s gaze snapped up to the arrival of yet another vehicle, and this one held his attention a bit longer. Knowing he couldn’t just stand there and wait, he let the others inside. “I do know the beans probably need stirred and the chicken will need to be reheated.”

“We’re on it,” Debbie said, and with that, they left him standing there watching as Jaycee got out on one side and Sage on the other. It was only then he thought he should have gone over and helped her out. Too late, she had stunned him immobile. He really hadn’t been kidding about getting no homework done with her around. She was still as gorgeous as the first day she’d stepped out of that car.

“What’re you standing around for?” Jaycee asked as they walked up. “Are we feeding people today or what?”

“Just need a hug to get me started,” he said, pulling Sage in. He let his eyes go closed to soak in her love. It always made him feel like anything was possible.

“Yeah. Yeah. Yeah,” Jaycee said. “Enough with the mushy stuff.” She clapped hard. “Let’s get a move on. We’ve got people to feed, people. Chop. Chop. Move it, people!”

Luke looked down at Sage. “She’s such a drill-sergeant.”

“Hey.” Sage hit him on the chest lightly. “That’s my sister you’re talking about. Watch what you say.”

He smiled at her. “Yes, Ma’am.”

They worked all day, making, filling, refilling, and cleaning. Sage had never felt like she belonged anywhere so much in her life. Even when Luke or Jaycee asked for her help with things like washing the potato salad warmers and the bar-be-que that smelled wonderful but was a really big pain to clean, she laughed right along with them at the jobs they were asked to do.

She most loved her time on the line, helping to fill plates and carry cups. The people were so nice, treating her as if she was an angel just for taking a little time out to feed them. Mrs. P’s rock soup comment had never gone very far from her heart, and she knew it never would. These were people, and they deserved to be treated with kindness, respect, and dignity.

“Good job, Sage,” the pastor said as she stood filling more cups with ice and tea.

“Thanks. We’ve had quite a crowd today.”

He nodded. “And thanks to you lots of extra people to help with it.”

“Me?” Sage finished one cup and set it to the side. “What did I do?”

“That impromptu bake sale of yours seems to have spurred the whole church community to want to help. I don’t know how many people who have said they never considered helping until they saw you out there taking dimes and quarters so we could get that frig.”

“I guess a little inspiration can go a long way.”

“Yes. It surely can.”

When the day was over, Luke took her home even though Jaycee was going the same direction. In fact, Jaycee seemed as though the driving arrangements were pre-set as she got in her car and told them she’d see them back at the house.

Sliding into his seat, Luke looked over at Sage. “Crazy day.”

She let her gaze drift over to him. “The craziest.”

Then picking up her hand, he kissed it. “And one of the best.”

The smile came without effort. “That too.”

They played cards at the Lawrences’ until nearly midnight when Luke headed home completely exhausted by the day but in a very good way. Being around her was like being plugged in to a 1,000 watt light bulb so that he didn’t even realize how tired he was until he dropped into bed.

Just as he drifted off, he heard the sound, and when his eyes pushed open, he saw the light. With a yawn that came from his toes, he reached for the cell phone and ran his hand down his face, blinking to see the message.

Night, darlin’. See ya in the mornin’.

Despite the exhaustion, he smiled and typed back. Night to you too, darlin’. I love you.

Not half as much as I love you. ‘Night.

How it was possible to be so happy and so tired, he had no idea. But he fell asleep with them wrapped around him as he dreamed about her and how different his life was with her in it.

The next morning when Sage got to church, the first thing she did was find Luke and give him a hug. The second thing she did was find Jane and give her a hug. In fact, she had hugged about half the people who showed up by the start of the service before she went in and took her seat with her family. Jane sat up front, alone again, and Sage sent up a silent prayer for her. Please, Lord, send Jane someone to love.

When the pastor stepped to the podium after the readings, Sage settled in next to her dad and cleared the world from around her so she wouldn’t miss anything.

“We are made in the likeness and image of God,” Pastor Steve said, and he paused to let that sink in. “The likeness and image of God. What does that mean? Well, first of all, it means we are to love because as 1 John 4:8 points out, ‘God is love.’  Not God loves, but God is love. Love is the essence of God. And we know that, right? As Christians we are called to love one another. We are even called to love our enemies and to do good to those who hate us.

“But I think we make a fundamental error when we fail to understand that God is love because God loves and lives in a relationship. God has always been in relationship—God the Father, God the Son, God the Holy Spirit. Three persons, so closely knit together in love that they are, in fact, One.” He put his hands together, lacing his fingers. “One God. In relationship. And we were made in His likeness and image. That means we were made for relationship. We were not made for independence.”

He pulled his hands apart and gripped the podium. “We were made to depend on each other. You are not weak for needing other people. Needing other people is how you were made. But we get this idea that we’re supposed to be strong and need no one. We get the idea that our worth is determined by how independent we are, but nothing could be further from the teachings of the Gospel. Jesus went off, yes, to our eyes, by Himself but so that He could spend time with His Father. In fact, Jesus tells the disciples that if they have seen Him, then they have seen the Father because He and the Father are One.”

Once again, he entwined his fingers. “It’s the same idea when a man marries a woman. The two of them become one. God is showing us in the love of a Godly couple His ideal of relationship. Notice, I did not say the relationship is ideal, at least here on earth. All couples have their ups and downs, but they commit to facing them as one. They raise their family as one. They knit their lives so closely together that they are no longer two individuals but one together in relationship.”

Stepping back, he thought through the next part. “In fact, when you get right down to our core, our essence of who we are in God, relationship is built into the system. Just like the Father cannot be a Father without a Son, so a Son can’t be a Son without the Father. And the knitting that holds them together is the love they have for each other which is called the Holy Spirit. It’s the same way it is with us. God, you, others—living and moving in a holy relationship. Learning together, being together, working together—to do something and be something bigger and greater than we could each ever be alone or separate.

“That’s why when we feel disconnected, we are in such pain. We are not designed to be disconnected. We are designed to be together. When St. Paul speaks about reconciliation.” Pastor Steve brought his hands together again. “That literally means to bring back together. To reconnect. And that is our call today and every day of our Christian lives, to bring people who are disconnected in, into the embrace of God with us. As we do that and the more we do that, the more we live out the call to be more Christlike, to live like Jesus did. He came to call sinners home. He came that we might be reconciled to God and to each other. So today, let us heed this call and surrender those things that keep us apart from others in our hearts. Let go of pettiness and jealousy and anger, hatred, and shame. Let us step into real love and real relationship because we are made in the image and likeness of God Himself—three persons, in one, living forever in an eternal bond of loving relationship.”

When they stood with the pastor, Sage’s heart swelled with the hope of the pastor’s words, the hope of being in a relationship with those she loved and was learning to love with all her heart. At that moment and before she realized what was happening, her father reached over and put his arm around her, drawing her to him, and she returned the hug. Maybe it wasn’t just the Father who needed a Son to be in a relationship. Maybe it was a father who needed a daughter, and a daughter who needed a father. With tears sliding down her face, she hugged him once more, really liking how that connection felt.

Gently he kissed the top of her head, and Sage knew she had just stepped out forever and for always from the reflection of the mirror into something new and wonderful, a place she had always and eternally been meant to stand. Right there, in the arms of a father who loved her no matter the paths and trials it had taken to get here. This was finally home.

Epilogue

“Go, Ryder! Go! Yeah!” Sage jumped up and down on the bleachers, her own safety not even a thought. “Go!”

“Swim!” Jaycee yelled right next to her. “Yes! Yes! You got it! Go!”

At the other end of the pool, Ryder hit the wall on the turn and headed back the other way. The entire stands erupted in cheers and screams so much so that Sage could hardly hear her own. It didn’t matter though because she had left sanity behind when Ryder had first come off the blocks. “Yes! Go! Go!”

With three strokes to go, Sage knew he had it. She put her hands in the air in victory. “YAY!”

When he touched and came up to whip his goggles off, Sage nearly knocked Jaycee off the stands in her enthusiasm. They grabbed each other and bounced even as they pounded their fists in the air.              “He did it!”

“That was amazing!” Emily said from the other side of Sage. “Wow! That boy can swim!”

It was then that Ryder looked up in the stands. His first place finish now finalized on the scoreboard. He smiled and waved at them, and right there in the midst of her family, Sage whooped and hollered her approval and love. She loved that kid with all her heart.

When the five of them headed back to the van, Jaycee reached over to try to snag the blue ribboned medal from around Ryder’s neck.

“Hey, hey, hey,” he said, “no touching the merchandise.”

“I just wanted to see it,” Jaycee said.

“Don’t listen to her Ryder,” Sage said, leaning down to his ear. “She will totally take it if you let her get close.”

He angled his steps toward Sage, and she put her arm around him protectively.

“Oh. Oh. I see how it is,” Jaycee said, but she clearly wasn’t mad. “Man, you wiped out the competition on that one. No one else was even close.”

“Must be those eggs I made for him this morning,” Emily said. “They gave him some extra go-power!”

“I think it was all the screaming you two did in the stands,” their father said. “My ears may never recover.”

“Oh, yeah, like you weren’t screaming too,” Jaycee said.

At the van, they all piled in.

“Okay, guilty as charged,” he said. When they were all in, he looked over at his wife. “Where to?”

She checked her watch. “We’d better get on home. The girls have to get ready for tonight. I think Hannah’s coming around four to help me with their hair.”

“Eep!” Sage squealed and clapped from her place in the back. “Little brother wins gold medal, check. Homecoming game, check. Dancing all night, check.”

Her father’s gaze found hers in the rearview mirror, and he lowered it at her.

“Okay. Okay. Dancing until midnight when Cinderella’s coach turns back into a pumpkin, check.”

He nodded and started out into traffic.

“What time is Kevin picking you up, Jaycee?” Emily asked.

“About five-thirty. We’re supposed to be there early for the homecoming court thing.”

“You’re going to be so gorgeous in your dress,” Sage said. “We may have to put you behind the bleachers so Kevin can actually play.”

Jaycee smiled at the compliment. “Well, I may have to hog-tie Luke to keep his hands off of you.”

Sage’s eyebrows went up at the fact her sister would say such a thing with their parents right there.

“And I may not let either of you go if you keep this up,” their father said, his gaze warning both of them.

“Pssh,” Jaycee said. “I’m sure both of them will be too freaked out by ‘the lecture.’” She put air quotes around the words. “I’m not sure Luke has ever recovered from freshman year.”

Sitting back, Sage smiled to herself. He hadn’t, but she wasn’t going to tell them that. Her thoughts went to the magical night ahead of them. As a junior Jaycee was sure to get Homecoming Princess, and Sage couldn’t be happier for her sister. Intense and so driven and focused, Jaycee sometimes scared her with the passion she brought to school events and activities. She couldn’t imagine what she would be like in basketball season. In fact, Luke had already warned her to lay low and speak softly—especially if and when they ever lost. Sage prayed even now that wouldn’t be often, and then she smiled to herself. Who would have thought she would be praying for such a thing four months ago?

At home, they all tumbled out with Emily calling out directions about lunch and who should get ready first and dresses and hair. Sage wondered what Luke was up to, if he was half as nervous as she was. So when she got into her room that was now devoid of the suitcases that had been put away in the attic, she laid down across her bed to text him.

How’d Ryder do? So wish I could have been there.

She smiled. He won. You freaking out yet?

Hannah got here an hour ago. She wants to know when you want her over there. Oh, and she brought your corsage thingy. She said she hopes it’s the right color.

Cream. How badly could you mess up cream?

Hey, darlin’, I don’t know cream from green, remember? It looks fine to me, but Hannah’s worried.

Tell her I’m sure it will be great. So I’ll see you in a few hours?

Can’t wait.

Me either. The conversation over, Sage flipped over and held the phone to her chest for a second. Then she bounced up. “Eep! Time to get ready!”

“When you girls get finished,” Emily called down the hall, “come on out here. I want pictures.”

“Ugh.” Sage put her head back, and Hannah yelped.

“No pictures!” Jaycee called from her room.

“Hey, don’t do that,” Hannah warned, “unless you want a nice burn mark right here across the top of your forehead.”

“Sorry. I’ll be good.” Pulling herself back up, Sage looked in the mirror and smiled. “Eee! I love it, Hannah. It’s amazing!”

“Well, sit still. It’s not done yet.”

“Yes, Ma’am.” But that was a tall order because her whole body was set on massive excitement mode.

“You girls almost finished? Mom’s getting antsy,” her dad said from the doorway.

“Two more,” Hannah said, unclipping the top of Sage’s hair and spinning one piece around and around the curling iron.

Coming in, her father gazed at her in the depths of the mirror. “Wow. You look so much like your mom.”

Sage smiled as her eyes went misty. “You think?”

“Yeah.” His eyes didn’t look exactly clear. “Beautiful. Absolutely gorgeous.”

“Stop,” Sage said, knowing she couldn’t wipe her eyes or she would destroy her make-up.

“Just let me get this in and we’re done.” Hannah swept the top layer over to the side and carefully but with some effort snapped the little clip into place. “There! All done.”

“Oh, Hannah!” Sage squealed. “It’s amazing!”

Hannah smiled as she stepped back to let Sage get up. When she did, she had to be extra careful with the yards and yards of soft ivory satin-chiffon that trailed from the intricately gold-beaded waistline all the way down to the floor.

“Perfect,” Hannah proclaimed. “My brother is not going to know what hit him.”

“Hey! Hello! Picture time or we’re going to miss this!” Emily called from the living room again.

“Guess it’s time,” Sage said with a lift of her shoulders.

“We’re coming.” Her father offered her his arm, and she took it with one look up at him. He didn’t say anything, just lifted his head and nodded to her. Sage ducked on the acceptance in his eyes and let him lead her out to the living room.

There, they found Jaycee, equally gorgeous in an emerald chiffon hi-low dress accented with gold-toned shoes and her hair upswept.

“Oh, Jaycee.” Sage let go of her father to go to her sister. “You’re gorgeous.”

“So are you!”

Without thinking, they hugged as the first camera flash went off. Then, pulling back, they each laughed as they touched their hair.

“Watch the hair,” they said simultaneously and then laughed.

“Okay, heads together,” Emily said and picked up the camera. However, instead of snapping the picture, she nearly dropped the thing. “Oh. I almost forgot. Here, Greg, hold this.”

In surprise he accepted the camera, barely catching it because both hands had been in his pockets.

“Mom!” they both whined.

“No. No. This is worth it. Just stay right there.” And she disappeared down the hallway.

“Well no use wasting good photo time,” their dad said. “Heads together.” And he snapped their picture. “You know who we need? Ryder! Bud! Get out here.”

Ryder came out, still wearing his medal.

“Get in the picture, hotshot.”

And their brother came between them. Each sister put an arm around him, and their dad started snapping away. Over the top of Ryder’s head, Jaycee got her sister’s attention and puckered her lips. Sage smiled, barely able to keep the laugh in as she nodded.

One. Two. Jaycee mouthed. “Three.”

From either side of him, Ryder’s sisters planted a kiss on his cheeks as the camera went snap, capturing his surprise for all the rest of history.

“Here they are,” Emily said as Ryder tried to recover and wipe the lipstick off. He went to the couch as she came over to them. Right in front of them, she stopped. “Now, girls. When we went through some of the stuff for the garage sale back in June, I came across these pearls. Now I know girls don’t do the pearl thing as much as they used to, and to be honest, I don’t even think these are real. But when I used to go to my grandma’s house when I was a little girl, she let me play with her pearls. So when she passed away, my mom agreed I should have them.” Emily held them up with more than mist in her eyes. “I don’t know who wants which ones. There’s one that’s a single strand and one that’s a double.”

Sage’s heart turned over at the offer, and make-up or not, she didn’t get the first tear caught.

“Oh, Mom,” Jaycee said. “Are you sure?”

“Yes. I’m sure. I want the two of you to have them.” She held them up just higher. “Now who wants which one?”

No one moved for a long moment.

“How about I take the double-strand,” Jaycee finally said. “Second daughter. Sage, you can have the single.”

“Oh, Jaycee.” Now the tears really were ruining her make-up. “I couldn’t.”

Jaycee took the single strand from her mom. “Yes. You can. I want you to have them.” Sniffing, she put on her best commanding face. “Now turn around and don’t argue or we’re going to miss our dates.”

Sage did as she was told, picking the fall of wavy hair off her neck so Jaycee could latch the necklace. When she was finished, Sage did the same for her sister.

“Okay. Okay,” their father said, “heads together.”

And with that, they leaned in as the camera captured a moment that was destined to have its own special place on the mantel.

As Luke pulled into the Lawrences’ driveway, he waved at Kevin and Jaycee, thinking it looked quite odd for the star cornerback to be picking up his date in a T-shirt and football pants. But some things couldn’t be helped and in a small town, pulling double duty with things was one of them. When he parked, he checked himself twice in the mirror and barely remembered the corsage in the passenger seat. He had been with Sage half-a-million times it seemed, so why were his nerves about to jump out of his skin now?

Heading up the back walk, he only barely caught himself before he knocked. This was no time to show up at the back door. Willing his breathing to actually start before he passed out, he went around and knocked on the front door. The wait nearly killed him.

“Luke,” her father said, finally opening the door and putting out a hand in greeting.

“Mr. Lawrence.” Why did this suddenly feel like freshman year all over again? Somehow he got his hand out though the nerves threatened absolute revolt.

“Come on in. Come on in.”

Luke stepped in, realizing that only Ryder was in the room, playing on a game device on the couch. “Uh, is Sage ready?”

“They’re making final gown adjustments. Come on in.”

The farther into that room he went, the more Luke had the feeling he was about to be eaten. Still, he forced his feet forward.

“Well,” Mr. Lawrence said, stopping in the middle of the room and putting his hands on his belt. “So here we are again.”

Luke’s gaze found the floor, bounced to the corsage in his hand, and then back to the floor. “Yes, Sir.”

With a slow nod, Mr. Lawrence appraised him. “Lot of water under the bridge since the last time.”

Not lifting his gaze, Luke nodded, afraid of what he would see if he looked up.

Mr. Lawrence knotted his arms in front of him. “You’re going to take care of her, right?”

It took effort but he finally got his gaze up. “Yes, Sir, I will.”

“And you’re going to love her enough to do what’s right for her, right?”

This nod was easier. “Yes, Sir. I always have.”

At that the older man smiled. He put out his hand again. “Okay. Just so we understand each other.”

“That we do, Sir.” Luke shook hands just as his gaze snagged on the entrance of every dream he’d ever had. The blood drained from his face with about the same velocity as the racing of his heart ramped up. “Oh…” Dropping her father’s hand, he stepped over to her, and asking with his eyes only, he laid the corsage in the chair and put his hands up to her arms. “Wow.”

Her smile was as bright as a diamond. “Is that it? Just wow?”

Taking all of her beauty in, he shook his head though it barely moved. “Yeah. Just wow.”

She laughed, and Luke couldn’t help himself as he pulled her in to his embrace and held her there, oblivious of everyone else in the room. “You look amazing.”

“Okay. Okay. Enough of that, you two,” Emily said, swiping at her eyes and grabbing up the camera.

“Yeah,” Hannah agreed, coming all the way into the room just as a knock sounded on the door.

“Who in the world is that?” Emily asked, spinning to it.

“Oh.” Luke ducked and ran his thumb down the side of his nose. “That’s my mom. She came to take pictures too.”

Greeting his mother at the door, Emily dragged her into a hug. “Hurry. Hurry. He’s about to give her the corsage!”

“I’m so glad I didn’t miss it,” Felicia said, coming in with her own camera. She took one look at them and swooned. “Oh, Sage, that dress is gorgeous, and look at you. Ohhh. I may melt.”

“Yeah. Yeah. Yeah,” Luke said as embarrassment crawled into his chest. “Can we get on with this so we don’t miss the game?” Of course, the game was the least of his concerns.

“Okay. Here, stand right here.” Emily took hold of him and dragged him to the other side of the room. “Yes. Right there. Yep. Perfect. That’s great. Now, Sage, pin his boutonniere on. But be careful, we don’t want blood on the dress.”

Luke looked down at her dubiously. “Or on me.”

“Or on him,” Felicia agreed as the cameras started flashing.

“Okay. I’ll try.” Sage took the little cream-colored flower from the side table. “Just yell if I poke you.”

“Ahh!” he said and then laughed when she jumped back.

Looking up at him, she shook her head. “Ha. Ha. Funny man. Now stand still or I really will jab you.”

It took her a minute, but she finally got the flower secure.

“Well, look at that. She’s almost as good at doing that as she is at doing dishes,” Luke said, appraising her handiwork.

“And now the corsage,” his mother coached.

Luke retrieved the flowers from the chair and went back to her. He was pretty sure the difficulty he had getting the plastic covering thing open was because of the shaking of his hands. Once open, he took the flowers out and looked at them to figure out how to put them on her.

“It’s a wrist corsage, dummy,” Hannah said from the side. “They just go on her wrist.”

“Oh.” He was too grateful to his sister for thinking of something like that he didn’t have the presence of mind to make a retort. Taking hold of the small band of elastic, he stopped. Before he lifted the flowers up, he waited a second for Sage’s gaze to come up to his.

When it did, he saw the joy and hope sparkling there. “The first of many.”

A soft smile split across her face, and holding her carefully with his eyes, he put the corsage on her wrist. In the next second, she was where she had always been meant to be—wrapped in his arms.

“Thank you. It’s perfect.”

Closing his eyes, he kissed her hair and whispered, “I love you, you know that?”

She tightened her grip around his waist. “Not half as much as I love you.” Then she looked up into his eyes and smiled.

Snap went the camera, and even without the photographic evidence, Luke knew he would remember that moment forever.

The game was never in question. They won by 21 points, and Jaycee even ended up with her princess crown. By the time they made it to the dance, Sage was spinning on a cloud of happiness so all-encompassing that she thought she might never come down again.

“Eep!” she said, catching up with her sister and giving her a hug. “Love the crown. It. Is. Fab-oo.”

“Ugh. I was so nervous. I about came out of this dress.” Jaycee did a pull on the top of the dress clearly not used to formalwear.

“Congrats, Jayc.” Luke came up behind Sage, stepped around her, and gave Jaycee a quick hug. “You looked like a million out there.”

“I wish I felt like a million. These shoes are about to snap my last nerve.” She reached down and tried to adjust them. “Have you guys seen Kevin? I think I lost him somewhere between the field and the dance floor.”

“He was over by the snacks last I saw him,” Luke said, putting his arm around Sage who snuggled in to his embrace.

“Okay. Thanks.” And Jaycee, with a very small limp, headed that direction.

A slow song started on the DJ’s speakers, and Luke turned to look down at Sage. “May I have this dance?”

“I’d be delighted,” she said, matching the fake formal quality of his request and batting her eyelashes in case he didn’t believe her. As the soft guitar began to play, she followed him, her hand tucked into his, out to the dimly lit floor. However, surprise jumped to her when instead of simply taking her in his arms, he spun her under his arm and out. She lowered her gaze on him. “What’s this? Has someone been taking dancing lessons?”

“Hannah.” He stepped toward her and pulled her close in to his embrace before pushing them gently into a slow waltz, going first one way and then the other on the cloud-like music. “And she’s about to kill my feet over the deal too.”

Sage giggled, ducking into his arm before pulling her gaze back up to his. “Well, I’ll try to be kind and not bruise your feet too badly.”

“That would be very much appreciated.” His gaze slid down to her as they glided across the dance floor, and Sage was imminently taken with how smooth he was at that. He grinned at her. “But I’d be a whole lot more worried about your feet than mine.”

Snagged by his gaze and the look therein, she laughed. Happiness didn’t begin to touch the feeling. “I’ll keep that in mind.”

As they danced, he took her hand and spun her under his arm and then out again, and bliss twirled her back to his embrace.

“Not too bad,” she said as joy danced through her.

“I’m learning.”

“I like this learning thing.”

“Me too.”

The song had gone from a soft lilting beat to a definite easy sway as the artist sang about not giving up no matter what happened. Drifting on the words and his touch and the way he was holding her and looking at her, Sage just let herself breathe. Back and forth. Back and forth until the movement and the moment were all she could concentrate on. And then, slowly, she began to let go of all the struggles, all the trials, all the heartache, all the obstacles that had tried so hard to make this moment never come into existence. Those were gone now, and all that remained was his love for her.

With each sway, they came closer together until he was pressing her into him.

“Hey,” Luke said, his hand wrapped protectively around hers as they moved together. “You know, you’re pretty good at this.”

However, instead of a laugh, Sage looked up at him and sank even deeper into the feeling of being surrounded by his love, by him. Never before had she felt so rock-solid safe, and as he pulled her back to him, she knew she could trust him with anything even the once-broken pieces of her heart. No, he hadn’t given up on them, on her, no matter what, and she felt the absolute certainty that he never would detach her feet from gravity. One way and then the other they swayed, and she let him lead, knowing she could just let go and let him with no thought that he would ever let harm come to her while he had a breath in his body.

“No, I won’t give up no matter what,” he sang as if he was making the pledge to her rather than just singing the words of some random song.

Sage tightened her grip on him, loving him as much in that moment as she had ever loved any other person ever. Coming back just a bit, she pulled her gaze up to his. “How did I ever get so lucky to find you?”

He grinned down at her. “Darlin’, I ask myself that same question every single day.”

Then, caught in the gentle, irresistible vortex of his presence and gaze, Sage relinquished the last shreds of control, moving only as her spirit and happiness took over everything else. Wrapping her hand in his gently, he spun her out again and then let her spin in to him so they were dancing not face-to-face but with her back to him.

“No, I won’t give up no matter what,” she sang, gazing up at him now swaying behind her, and soft understanding drifted into and through his eyes at the words she had sung. Even as she moved there with him, Sage wanted him to know that they weren’t just some words in a song. She meant them with all her heart. “You know that, right?”

The music continued as the dancers swirled around them though neither even noticed the others. He let her go so she slowly came back around and into his arms, not fancy, just right. Her wrists wrapped up and around his neck as his hands came to rest on her waist.

Arms, hands, and gaze he held her as gently as she had ever been held. “I was sure hoping you would say that.”

Now it was her holding his gaze, gently, tenderly, steadfastly. “I mean it, you know? I won’t give up on this, on us, no matter what.”

“I know. Believe me, darlin’, I know.” Then right there in the middle of the dance floor, his gaze turned liquid, and he tenderly lowered his lips to hers as their swaying stopped.

Tilting her head just enough, Sage accepted his kiss. It was gentle and soft, gone but not in a heartbeat. And then he was looking at her again.

“I love you.”

“Not half as much as I love you.” Breathing him in, she pulled him to her and put her head on his chest, easily releasing herself into the arms of his unbreakable, unrelenting, unconditional love.

No space had ever been so right or so unquestionably perfect, and finally she knew without a doubt that the perfection of love really was what would bind them in unity. From this moment into God’s eternity. And that was exactly the way it had always been meant to be. No more mirrors. No more struggle. Only love, and love, real love would be enough no matter what.

Did you LOVE Luke and Sage?

Wait ‘til you meet Jaycee and Derek!

When I’m Weak

Coming August 2016!

Sneak Peak

Chapter 1

From “When I’m Weak”

“And that’s a wrap! Thanks, everyone!” Jaycee Lawrence called over the crowded front lawn. Cameras, boom mics, and cords snaked in all directions, save for the direction where Derek West stood, hugging the grateful homeowners one last time.

“Thank you so much, Derek,” John Walters said, shaking her star’s hand like an old-time pump he was trying to get water from.

Derek. Smooth, cool, easy-going Derek just smiled under that thick scruff of whiskers that got all the girls’ hearts a-flutter. “It really did turn out beautifully.”

June Walters gave Derek a hug. “You are so amazing. I still can’t believe how incredible the kitchen is. I might never leave.”

“Well, I hope you leave sometimes,” Derek said with a laugh. “John here might get lonely.”

“Are you kidding? I’ll be in there with her!” John put his arm around his wife and hugged her to him. “We, really… we’re so grateful.”

Staying just slightly to the side and back out of the way, Jaycee waited. Soon enough Derek would tear himself away from the adulation and rejoin reality. She used to worry about that, jumping in to tell him they needed to go right away. Now she knew he knew that well enough, but he also understood the value of spending just a few more minutes after the cameras stopped rolling so the homeowners didn’t feel like they were just one more stop on his agenda.

“Thank you, too, Jaycee.” John came over and shook her hand though maybe not as enthusiastically.

“You’re so welcome. We hope you love it.”

“Oh, we will,” his wife said. “In fact, I already know what I’m going to make tonight.”

John looked at her. “Let’s go get started.”

They turned and waved their good-byes. With one more wave back at them, Jaycee looked up at Derek and patted him on the back. “Another miracle makeover. The ratings people are going to love it.”

He shrugged and smiled that smile that almost wasn’t as they started for the cars. The crew had already started the cleaning job that would take most of the next two hours. “Making dreams come true. That’s what we’re all about, right?”

She liked that about him. His focus. He got a job, did the job incredibly well, and was happy just to make others happy.

“So where’re we off to next?” He accepted a bottle of water from one of the assistants to an assistant and downed half of it in one chug before they even got to the car.

“Indiana.” Jaycee slid into the driver’s seat of the little white rental car they’d been using for the past six weeks and stowed the clipboard that was never far away in the backseat with the rest of her things. “Gary. It’s a cute little two-story with a dad and his daughter. The mom passed away a couple years ago. They’re still trying to recover, move on, you know?” She started the car and headed out of the little neighborhood for the last time, bound for the airport. If they were lucky, they’d be in Gary early enough to get some decent food and maybe even a good night’s sleep.

“Kitchen? Family room?” He finished the water and eased back into the seat. She couldn’t blame him for being exhausted. He’d been working night and day on this last remodel, and like most of them it had gone right down to the wire.

“Basement and maybe the master.” Glancing both directions, she turned out onto the four-lane and checked the direction on the GPS. North. Good. At least she wouldn’t get them hopelessly lost this time. Driving had been one of the most challenging parts of this job at first, that and keeping her heart in check every time Derek West walked into the room.

Nobody had to tell her why he was such a hit on the Home & Hearth Channel. Tall, with massively good looks. Just the right amount of build. Kind. Affable. Hard-working. He was the guy every woman in America wanted in her kitchen. The fact that she got to work with him nearly round the clock and up-close-and-personal had not been lost on her heart for the first several months, but eventually, they had settled into an easy rhythm and she couldn’t be upset about that. After all, she, more than anyone, knew Derek West was not the kind of guy who would ever settle down with someone. Oh, no. He had hot dates lined up from one coast to the other, and Jaycee had finally accepted that none of those dates would ever include her. As they sped out onto the freeway, she looked over at him because he hadn’t replied, and sure enough, he was already sleeping.

She wasn’t even going to count how many hours of sleep he had missed the last three nights. The job had been going so well, and then the pipe behind the sink ruptured, and after that, well, it was all kind of a blur to her as well.

Her cell phone beeped, and she dug for it in her purse on the console between them, finally coming up with it just as another motorist honked his displeasure with her driving. “Pick a lane,” she said to the car in front of her. With Derek sleeping, she didn’t want to use the speaker phone, so she swiped it on and put it to her ear. “Jaycee Lawrence.”

“Jaycee. I’m glad I caught you. Listen, we’ve decided to bump up production on the Smith house.”

“Bump it up? Brent? You can’t be serious.” With only one hand on the wheel, she maneuvered into the split lane veering off to the right. “Derek is done for. Seriously. He needs a few days.”

“Days he doesn’t have. Tell you what. It’s Thursday. If you guys can be at the Smith house in the morning to do the initial run through, he can take Saturday and Sunday off. How’s that?”

Gee, thanks for your magnanimous generosity. She wanted to say it, but she didn’t. “Can we at least make it ten tomorrow? We’re going to be lucky to get there tonight at any decent hour.”

Another horn honked, and she struggled to keep her nerves in check.

“Fine. Ten, but don’t be late.”

“When have I ever been late, Brent? Will it be Elle or Katie?”

“Elle is setting this one up. I’ve already got Katie scouting in Nevada. I thought that would be a nice change of pace. We haven’t done anything in Nevada yet.”

Jaycee couldn’t think about Nevada. Indiana was taxing her coping mechanisms. In fact, if they made it to the airport alive, she was going to celebrate. “Okay, listen, Brent, I’ve got to go. I’ll talk to you soon.”

“All right. Have a safe flight.”

And with that, she beeped the phone off and flipped it onto her purse.

In the other seat Derek shifted and opened one eye. “Brent?”

“Yeah.” However, Jaycee shook her head as her gaze took in all the traffic. “We’ll talk about it later.” She glanced over at him. “Get some sleep.”

“Hm. Okay.” And it was clear he was already there.

The airport wasn’t much better than the traffic, and Derek was glad he had a trail guide who would chop down the Amazon to get him where he needed to be on time. It was nice not to have to worry about things like flights and schedules, tickets and when he would eat. Mostly he just worked and let her take care of the details of living.

“I figured we could grab something quick for a late lunch,” Jaycee said as they stood in the line taking off their shoes and pulling everything out of their pockets. This part had at first been awkward, but they had done it so many times, now it was just routine.

Derek flipped his wallet into the little gray plastic container and added his boots and belt too. “Okay but nothing with grease. Whatever those burgers were that the guys brought in last night… wow.”

Stepping into and then through the scanner, he collected his things back on the other side.

“That was not my fault,” Jaycee said, stepping through the scanner and being cleared to continue. “I told you we should’ve ordered Chinese.”

“And you were right as usual.” He put one terracotta-colored Chukka boot on and then the other before grabbing his belt and putting the rest of himself back together.

Jaycee was on the other side doing much the same thing except with bracelets and her watch, her clipboard, purse, tablet case and boots, she didn’t get put back together quite so easily. He was ready and waiting long before she was. Finally, she strode over to him attaché in one hand, purse in the other. “Kendall said the proofs from the photo shoot came in,” she said as he turned to follow her up the concourse. “I thought maybe we could look at them on the plane.”

“Are any of them worth anything? I still think we should have postponed that one. I felt like I was going to die that day.”

“You don’t have to remind me. I was there, remember?”

At Gate 15, they stopped to check all the pertinent information on the little board. When Jaycee was satisfied that everything was on-schedule and correct, she let out a hard sigh. “So, something to eat. A sandwich? There’s bar-be-que down the way I think.”

“How about a steak?”

She appraised him with one slow nod. “How about when we get to Gary?”

Derek put his head back. “Fine. Then I guess a sandwich.”

With no more discussion, they headed back the way they had come. “You know, I really think that last stand-up with the Walters went well,” she said as they walked. “Mrs. Walters loved that pull down faucet on her sink.”

“Oh, you noticed that too, huh?” At the door to the first little restaurant they came to, he opened it and held it for her.

Once inside she ordered up the table, and they were seated in the dimly lit area over by the bar. It was 3:15 in the afternoon, so it wasn’t like the place was hopping.

Taking his menu, Derek blinked his eyes wider. “Wow. Either they don’t want you to see the menu or the prices. What is up with the lighting in this place?” He looked up and frowned. “Well, no wonder, they’ve got three lights out, and this overhead is doing nothing but creating ambiance if you want to call it that.”

Jaycee shook her head. “Do you ever stop? Seriously? Can’t you walk into a single space without figuring out how you would redo it if you got the chance?”

His smile was sheepish. “Sorry. Habit I guess.”

She perused the menu. “What sounds good?”

“I told you. Steak.”

“And I told you we’ll do steak when we get to Gary.” She reached over and snapped her fingers in front of his face. “Focus. This is lunch. Remember?”

“Well, if I had gotten more than three hours of sleep, or if there was maybe more light on the subject…”

With that, Jaycee reached down into her purse and pulled out her cell phone. She snapped it on, the light coming on with the intensity of a backlit computer. “There.” In one motion she handed it to him. “Happy now.”

Derek angled the light at his menu. “Oh, wow, look. They have steak.”

Letting her shoulders slump, Jaycee gave up. “Fine. What do you want with your steak?”

In no time they were on the plane winging northward over corn fields and the little towns that dotted the Midwest. Destination O’Hare International in Chicago which Jaycee was still trying not to think about. She pulled out her NotePad and swiped at it to bring up the photo shoot proofs marketing had sent over.

“There were a couple of these I thought were pretty good,” she said, swiping some more. “Like this one. I like the leaning back thing.”

Derek took one look at it and grimaced.

“Bad?” she asked, gauging his reaction.

He shook his head. “You know I hate this stuff.”

“Yeah, well, I’m sorry, but Brent wants your opinion. It’s your show as you keep reminding everyone within earshot.”

“I know, but I’m a contractor not a male model. This stuff is just weird.” He took the thing from her and swiped through the pictures. Most of them he couldn’t have even seen because he went too fast. “Bad. No. Hate it. Yuck.” Holding it out, he contorted his face. “Seriously? I look like I just ate a lemon.”

Reaching for it, she took it back and went back a couple. “They are not that bad. Look. This one’s good with the sledgehammer. Makes you look all macho and tough.”

“Okay. That one’s not so bad. But these others? What is this one?” He crossed his arms like he had them in the picture and put a haughty look on his face. “I look like the unhappy librarian right before closing time.”

Jaycee laughed at his theatrics. “It’s a good thing the marketing team can’t hear you. They would fold up their tents and go home. We only spent half a day on these. Now come on. We’ve got to narrow this down to like five or six they can use for the promos.”

With a sigh, Derek took the little device back and started swiping through them again.

“That one’s okay,” Jaycee said, leaning over his shoulder to see. “I like the fence with the black background.”

“It’s not too bad I guess,” he admitted without enthusiasm.

“And I like this close up.”

“Really? I look like I’m trying out for a soap opera.”

“I guess you could be the handyman,” she teased. “I could mention it to Brent.”

Instantly Derek sat up, wide-eyed. “Don’t you dare even think about doing that. You do and I will so kill you and bury your body so no one will ever find it.”

Biting her lips to keep from laughing out loud, Jaycee ducked even as she looked around. “Shhh. Other people will hear you.”

He gave her a hard, angry look. “Yeah? Well, it would serve you right.”

“Oh.” She sat up again. “By the way, I was going to mention. They called from marketing, and one of the syndicated radio talk shows called.” With a brush, she ran her hand through the air. “Totally a fishing expedition to see if you’d like to do their show. I told marketing I’d run it by you.”

“A radio show?” he asked dubiously. “What would we talk about?”

“I’m guessing your meteoric rise to the top of the remodeling world. Either that or the host’s leaky faucet and how to fix it. Could go either way.”

“Ha. Ha.” Tiring of the task of looking at himself, Derek handed her the NotePad back. A second and he leaned back in his seat and closed his eyes.

Surprise jumped on her. “What? Aren’t you going to help me pick something?”

“You pick. I don’t care. Just not the one with the lemon face.”

Swallowing her sigh, Jaycee sat back in her own seat. Yes, she thought sarcastically to the part of her that registered frustration, she had such a hard life. Staring at a handsome guy who could sweep any girl he wanted to off her feet. Yes, yes, she had the hardest job in America.

And with that, she pulled out her notebook and set about choosing the pictures he would have chosen if he was actually choosing them himself.

O’Hare turned out to be a madhouse. Jaycee had known it would be, but still she had hoped. “I wish we could get a cab.”

“To go to Gary?” Derek followed her from the baggage claim to the car rental counter. “What would that cost like a million bucks?”

“I said I wish. Then again, it might be worth it.” She stepped up and explained what they needed to the rental car attendant. Thankfully Derek wasn’t the hard-to-please type. Four wheels that wouldn’t break down and that was good enough for him.

While the attendant punched in the information, Jaycee dragged her purse back up to her shoulder and checked her watch. “I knew that layover was a bad idea. Traffic is going to be a nightmare.”

Standing there, with the black shoulder strapped bag dangling from his shoulder, Derek put his hands in his pockets and smiled and nodded to a few people who passed by. Instantly they ducked behind their hands as they stared.

“Here we are, Ms. Lawrence,” the attendant said. “I just need your signature. Here. Here. And here. And then, here as well.”

She fought to keep the purse strap on her shoulder as she juggled the attaché. No one would ever be able to read this signature. “Done.”

The attendant nodded. “The shuttle outside will take you to the car lot.”

“Thanks.” Jaycee reached down and retrieved the handle of her rolling suitcase. “Okay. All set.” It was interesting how normal the odd looks had become from others in airports and everywhere else they went. Outside and with him trailing her, she checked one way and then the other before heading down to the little green van. Getting in, she looked at her watch again. “It’s going to be eight o’clock even if we’re lucky. I sure hope Elle has the hotel thing all ironed out. In fact…” She scooted over for him to follow. With difficulty, she dug the cell phone out and placed the call. “Elle, hey, this is Jaycee. Yeah, we just landed. Can you give me the address for the hotel? K. Yeah. Hold on.”

The juggling continued as she fished for a paper and a pen, knowing she should have had those ready. “Yeah. Okay.”

With a screech the van pulled out into traffic, sending Jaycee careening right into Derek’s shoulder.

“Ugh. Crud. Sorry,” she said and scooted farther over. “Yeah. I’m here. Okay. What is it?”

Chicago traffic proved even more challenging than Jaycee had anticipated. The GPS system on the little car kept saying, “Turn left in 500 feet” because they had sat in the exact same spot for ten minutes.

“I know that!” Jaycee finally said to the thing. “Will you shut up already?”

With concern, Derek looked over at her. “How much coffee did you have this morning?”

She glared at him. “Clearly not enough.” Coming up, she hit the horn. “Come on, people! Move already!” Frustration stacked on top of her as around the seatbelt, she put her head onto her fist that was propped there at the top of her elbow on the windowsill. “I do not believe this. We’re never going to get there.”

“So, what’s the rush?” He stretched out his long, jean-clad legs and crossed his arms. “You late for a hot date or something?”

Corralling her frustration with life so she didn’t outright growl at him, Jaycee reached down and flipped on the air. “No. I was hoping to have some time to get out of these clothes.” She angled her nose down to her shirt. “I’m not even sure I changed this morning.”

He leaned over and took a sniff as well. “Probably not.”

“Ha. Ha.”

With a tip of his head, he smiled at her. “Seriously. You should learn to chill a little. Look around. It’s a beautiful day. We’re in Chicago, the windy city on a day that’s not even windy. You don’t think that’s something to enjoy?”

Enjoy? That word was not a word in her life’s vocabulary at the moment. “I just want to get to the Interstate and out of this wall-to-wall nightmare. Is that really so much to ask? Come on!” She honked at the guy cutting right into her lane. “Are you kidding me? Where did you learn to drive?”

One eye on her, Derek reached over and hit the radio button. “Maybe some music would help.”

“Not likely.” Still she watched his arm, brushed with just the right amount of glistening hair. Masculine. Did every part of him have to scream that word so loudly? She re-anchored her gaze outside and forced a calming breath into her lungs as thankfully she made the final turn. “Yes. The Interstate. Finally.”

Next to her Derek bobbed his head to the beat. “I love this song.”

It would’ve been nice to have a song to love or to have heard a song in the past year. Unfortunately, songs in her world were few and far between.

“Two rooms for Starr Productions,” Jaycee said when she tumbled up to the extended stay hotel counter barely making it before she dropped everything. “I think Elle Peterson already booked them?”

“Let’s see here.”

It was then that Jaycee noticed Derek hadn’t followed her all the way to the counter. In fact, he was no longer even behind her. In concern, she scanned the lobby and found him, chatting up a cute blonde who sat on one of the comfortable-looking couches.

Fighting the annoyance, Jaycee tugged at the slightly-rounded bottom of her blouse and then resettled the strap of her purse on her shoulder. He’s a grown man, Jayc. He can do whatever he wants.

“Ah, yes. Here it is. Ms. Peterson is in 515 in the tower, and the other two rooms are adjacent to that. 517 and 519.”

“Excellent.” Three more signatures, and Jaycee was ready to call it a life and die. “Thank you very much.”

“We hope you enjoy your stay with us.”

“Oh, I’m sure we will.” She accepted the little credit-card looking key things, gathered up all of her belongings one last time and with a sigh to get herself moving again, headed over to the two now chatting away as if they had been friends forever. It wasn’t easy to smile at the woman, but Jaycee did so anyway. Then she looked up at Derek. “Here’s your key-card. We’re up in the tower.”

“Oh, great. Thanks.” He accepted the card and shoved it in his pocket. “Jaycee, this is…” He looked at the woman who Jaycee now saw had a small waist cinched with a tiny belt and jewelry dripping from every limb.

“Bree,” she said with a thick Wisconsin accent.

Derek smiled his approval. “Bree. Right.” Then he turned his attention solely on Bree. “Listen, I’ll be back down in about 30 minutes if you don’t mind waiting?”

Wanting to crawl into a hole somebody else had dug, Jaycee fought to not put her head down although she did wind her lips under her teeth to keep from screaming. Humiliation drained through every pore of her whole body, and she could not stop the sigh.

“Great,” Derek said, touching Bree’s arm, and Jaycee didn’t miss the wink he gave the woman. “It won’t take me long.”

“I’ll be waiting.”

I’ll be waiting, Jaycee wanted to mimic. Ugh, could the woman be any more transparently coquettish? Even Jaycee was embarrassed for her. “Are we going now?”

Derek looked down at her as if he’d forgotten she was standing there. “Ready when you are.”

It took less time than even he had thought it would, and Derek West, shined up and polished, headed out for his night on the town with Bree Whatever-Her-Last-Name-Was. She was hot. That’s really all that mattered.

Coming out of the hotel room, he glanced down the hallway at Jaycee’s door and thought about knocking to tell her where he was going and not to wait up. However, she had things to do, and he didn’t want to disturb her. With a check for his wallet and his room key, he headed out. Maybe Gary, Indiana wouldn’t be so bad after all.

When I’m Weak

Book Two in The Grace Series

Coming August 2016!

PreOrder NOW on AMAZON

Also Available from Staci Stallings

Kindle and Audiobook Editions

(click the links to read more about the books)

The Courage Series

To Protect & Serve {Kindle} {Audiobook}  She’s a control freak. He’s a firefighter with a death wish. Watch the sparks fly when these two get together.

White Knight  {Kindle} {Audiobook} The one he couldn’t save was the love of her life. How can he ever make that terrible failure right again?

For Real {Kindle} {Audiobook} She’s got issues. He’s got secrets. Can they ever learn to be “for real”?

The Friendship Series

Eternity Aaron never noticed Harmony until now. Now, it might be too late.

The Easy Way Out Drew thought he knew what love was, maybe he was wrong.

The Harmony Series

Cowboy One night Ashton Raines walked away from everything.

Lucky One man. One woman. One night that changes everything.

The Faith Series

A Work In Progress Rebecca hated “the beautiful people” until she fell for one. Now what?

A Little Piece of Heaven Emily loves God. Jeremy doesn’t believe in Him. How will this ever work?

A Light in the Darkness One night, he becomes her angel in the darkness.

The Dreams Series

Dreams by Starlight Sometimes where you are is not where you are meant to be.

Reunion 10 years later. Everything has changed. Or has it?

Single Titles

Deep in the Heart {Kindle} {Audiobook} He’s worth billions. She’s penniless. What do they have in common? Everything.
More Than This He was only looking for a cup of coffee and a quiet place to write. She helped him find himself.

Coming Undone {Kindle} {Audiobook} Ben was footloose and fancy-free until he got the call that changed his everything.

The Long Way Home Jaxton is about to learn what is really important in life, and it’s not what he thought.

If You Believed in Love He’s given up on love, but love won’t give up on him.

The Price of Silence Who can you trust when the unseen eyes are watching your every move?

Princess She hated basketball—and him. Could Heather have been wrong about everything?

Whisper If You Have To She’s got secrets. So does he.  Can they learn to be honest together?

Living in the Light Bible Studies

Theirs is the Kingdom Who is your Source? Why does it matter? Meditations on the first Beatitude.

The Two Trees In the Garden of Eden there were two trees, and those trees still present a choice for us today.

The Gifts of the Holy Spirit Seven gifts that can change your life.

Non-fiction

Something’s Not Right One family’s journey through dyslexia.

Reflections on Life 52 real life stories about struggles and victories in this life.

Reflections on Life II 83 new real life stories that challenge us all to reach for the life God truly wants for us.

Reflections on Life III Trials and pain… through it all God is there. Real life stories from the “territory.”

True Power & Real Peace How do you find True Power & Real Peace?

In Print

(click the links to read more about the books)

Eternity

Cowboy

Lucky

Deep in the Heart

Dreams by Starlight

Reunion

Reflections On Life I

Reflections On Life II

Coming Undone

To Protect & Serve

White Knight

For Real

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About the Author

A stay-at-home mom with a husband, three kids and a writing addiction on the side, Staci Stallings has numerous titles for readers to choose from. Not content to stay in one genre and write it to death, Staci’s stories run the gamut from young adult to adult, from motivational and inspirational to full-out Christian and back again. Every title is a new adventure! That’s what keeps Staci writing and you reading. Although she lives in Amarillo, Texas and her main career right now is her family, Staci touches the lives of people across the globe with her various Internet and writing endeavors.

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